Late Night Retro Television Review: Hunter 2.4 “Rich Girl”

Posted on October 1, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Hunter, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1991. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, Hunter and McCall investigate a rich girl for murder.

Episode 2.4 “Rich Girl”

(Dir by James Whitmore, Jr., originally aired on October 19th, 1985)

When an elderly millionaire named Ralph Flagg (Robert Rockwell) is shot and nearly killed, his much younger wife, Ginger (Lois Hamilton), is arrested for the crime. Even though she’s acquitted, McCall and Hunter continue to believe Ginger tried to kill her husband for his money. When Ginger plunges off a balcony, they start to have their doubts. What if the mastermind behind the violence is actually Ralph’s daughter, Cynthia (Dorian Lopinto)? Hunter goes undercover as a former basketball player turned golf hustler and gets close to both Cynthia and her loutish boyfriend, Bradley (John Calvin).

The plot doesn’t provide as many twists as one might hope. From the start, it’s made clear that Cynthia and Bradley are the murderers. Bradley may be the more openly evil of the two, but Cynthia is definitely the mastermind. When it starts to seem as if Bradley is going to turn on her, Cynthia shoots him and then claims it was self-defense. When it appears that Cynthia is going to get away with that murder as well, Hunter and McCall convince Ralph to change his will so Cynthia must confess to her crimes if she wants to inherit his fortune. Cynthia responds by going home, grinding a couple of pills into her ice cream, and then apparently committing suicide while a tear rolls down her cheek.

Agck!

That ending really took me by surprise. Cynthia went from being the episode’s villain to an almost tragic figure. That said, I’m not really a fan of Hunter and McCall hounding people into suicide. I would much rather they just make good arrests, but that’s not their style.

At least this episode didn’t end with Hunter saying, “Works for me.”

Retro Television Review: Blood Ties (dir by Jim McBride)

Posted on October 1, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! This Thursday, I will be reviewing Blood Ties, which aired its only episode on Fox in 1991. The pilot film can be found on Tubi!

Episode 1.1 “Blood Ties”

(Directed by Jim McBride, originally aired on May 27th, 1991)

In Long Beach, California, there is a thriving community of Carpathians. Eli Chelarin (Patrick Bauchau) is the patriarch, a businessman who builds skyscrapers, makes deals, and flies into a rage whenever he learns of anti-Carpathian prejudice. Harry Martin (Harley Venton), born Harlevon Martinescu, is the reform-minded journalist who thinks it is time for the Carpathian community to start mingling with the rest of America. Celia (Michelle Johnson) is Eli’s sultry sister. While Eli is making big business deals and Harry is preaching coexistence, Celia and the younger generation are having a good time.

And then there is Cody Puckett (Jason London), who grew up in small-town Texas and was barely even aware of his Carpathian heritage. That all changed when a group of Carpathian hunters (led by Bo Hopkins) killed Cody’s parents and burned down his house. Cody flees Texas and ends up in California, where he hooks up with his distant relatives.

Harry reveals to Cody that the Carpathians are actually vampires, but that does not mean what Cody initially assumes. Yes, the Carpathians are directly descended from Lilith, and yes, they do have a taste for blood. However, they are not immortal (though they do tend to live to be at least 120). They can go out in the sunlight. They cannot turn into bats. They cannot be stopped by a cross. A wooden stake only kills them because it would kill anyone. The Carpathians are stronger than the average human, but they are not super-strong. (Cody nods and then asks if Carpathians are better at sex than average humans.) In short, the Carpathians are vampires who do not actually get to do any of the fun vampire things. To me, that defeats the whole purpose of being a vampire. Harry and his relatives spend so much time scoffing at misconceptions about vampires that they seem to miss the point: vampires are only interesting as long as they are doing vampire stuff. Vampires that turn into bats will always be more entertaining than vampires who just happen to live a long time.

Blood Ties was a made-for-TV movie that also served as a pilot for a potential series. It is easy to see the direction the series would have taken. Blood Ties mixes 90210-style teenage antics with older adults debating the best way to protect their community. Eventually the Carpathian hunters show up in Los Angeles, and the vampires make quick work of them. Presumably Bo Hopkins would not have been a series regular. Jim McBride’s direction is stylish, and the pilot is well acted, especially by Michelle Johnson. That said, it is hard not to feel that the pilot sabotaged itself by focusing on how the Carpathians were different from traditional vampires. The film rather cavalierly dismisses a lot of things that most horror fans love about vampires. Making the characters vampires who are not really vampires just feels kind of pointless.

Perhaps fortunately, Blood Ties did not become a regular series. If nothing else, that left Jason London available for Dazed and Confused. It is a fair trade.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 5.5 “Love and Marriage”

Posted on September 30, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, OJ Simpson falls for a blonde. Uh-oh.

Episode 5.5 “Love and Marriage”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on November 8th, 1989)

TD Parker (OJ Simpson) and Kristy Fullbright (Shannon Tweed) end up working closely together while searching for a new punter. Kristy is in the process of getting a divorce from her husband. TD is already divorced and has been chasing after almost every woman that he sees. Still, TD doesn’t know if he should get involved with someone with whom he works. Kristy, meanwhile, isn’t sure that she isn’t still in love with her husband….

Meanwhile, Zagreb goes on a dating show but is humiliated when his date, Colleen (Mitzi Kapture), says that he was a terrible date whose breath smelled like garlic. The entire team watches the show and starts to chant, “Colleen! Colleen!” Ha hah, everyone hates Zagreb. Later, Colleen approaches Zagreb at the bar and tells him that the show told her to say a lot of negative stuff about Zagreb but, actually, she wants to date him again. Isn’t Zagreb married? I remember that there was a huge storyline about him getting married during the third season.

Finally, Bubba and Jethro are taken to small claims court over an incident that happened at the bar. Jethro decides that he would like to get together with the plaintiff.

But let’s get back to OJ Simpson and Shannon Tweed. I don’t know if I can express just how boring it is to watch two mid actors with zero screen presence fall for each other. Because it’s impossible to look at TD Parker and not see OJ Simpson, I found myself getting very worried as I watched TD obsess on an emotionally fragile blonde. At the end of the episode, it looks like TD and Kristy are finally going to hook up but then Kristy’s husband calls and says he’s not sure if he wants a divorce. Kristy says she’s not sure either. TD leaves Kristy’s house, looking regretful.

As I’ve mentioned before, the presence of OJ Simpson add a subtext to every scene that undoubtedly was not there when this show first aired. OJ is supposed to look wistful as he leaves the house. Instead, I found myself hoping that Kristy would remember to lock all the doors that night and definitely not go out to dinner at Mezzaluna.

I guess the important thing, though, is that Bulls got a new punter.

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 8.14 “Country Blues/A Matter of Taste/Frat Brothers Forever”

Posted on September 30, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, Adam’s old fraternity brother takes a cruise. He’s got a secret!

Episode 8.14 “Country Blues/A Matter of Taste/Frat Brothers Forever”

(Dir by Jerome Courtland, originally aired on December 8th, 1984)

Simon (Farley Granger) and Valerie (Terry Moore) used to be lovers but now, they’re rival interior designers. They are competing for the chance to redesign that ship’s cabins and, of course, they both end up sabotaging each other. The Captain grows so frustrated that he decides that the cabins are fine just the way they are and I agree. The cabins are functional and bland and they encourage the passengers to spend most of their time in either the lounge or at the pool. As for Simon and Valerie, they realize that they’re still in love. It’s a win-win-win for everyone.

Country singer Billy Bodine (Matt McCoy) falls in love with Arlene Cort (Leah Ayres), little realizing that she’s been bribed by his manager, Cappy (Claude Akins), to break his heart. Billy writes his most popular songs when he’s depressed. After she lies to him about having another lover, Arlene feels terrible, especially after she learns that she’s inspired Billy to write not just one but two songs about how heartbroken he is. Arlene wants to come lean but, if Arlene confesses, she’ll lose her chance to be on the big Kenny Rogers television special. Of course, Arlene does confesse. Love is more important than Kenny. Billy fires Cappy. Cappy doesn’t care. Cappy announces that he’s going to go into the pickle-selling business and make a million dollars. Arlene finds love but she does lose her chance to be a big TV star. So, this one is a win-lose-win.

Finally, Adam’s old frat brother, Buzz (Roy Thinnes), boards the ship with Jim Dolan (Michael McGrady). Buzz says that Jim is his cousin. Adam promises to find dates for both Buzz and Jim. Uhmm, Adam, I don’t think Buzz and Jim are interested in the same dates that you are.

This was the first and only episode of The Love Boat to feature a gay couple and, to my surprise, their story was actually handled with a good deal of sensitivity. Buzz fears that Adam won’t accept that he’s gay but he also doesn’t want to spend the entire cruise living a lie. (Adam keeps trying to set Buzz and Jim up with every single woman on the cruise.) When Buzz does come out to Adam, Adam is surprised but accepting. I appreciated that this episode allowed Adam to have a realistic reaction to Buzz coming out as opposed to turning Adam into some sort of idealized perfect best friend. Instead, Adam has the reaction that you would expect a good-hearted but old-fashioned boomer to have. He’s surprised and, briefly, at a loss for words. The fact that Adam does then accept Buzz for who he is and apologizes for his earlier surprise shows that people can continue to grow and learn, regardless of how old they may be.

Two of the stories were silly but the third one made up for them. This wasn’t a bad cruise.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.21 “Lucky 13”

Posted on September 29, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, Pacific Blue explores the dark side!

Episode 4.21 “Lucky 13”

(Dir by Emily Skopov, originally aired on April 18th, 1999)

A murder at an occult shop leaves two witches dead. Another witch is found barely alive on the beach, her body branded with alchemical signs. The bike cops are dumbfounded. I’m confused as to why there aren’t any Homicide detectives around. And Granger …. well, Granger’s freaking out because he’s been having nightmares about his dead friend, Tim.

In this episode, Granger reveals that he knows a lot about occult symbols. When TC demands to know why Granger knows so much (as if it’s any of TC’s business), Granger explains that he used to be into Satanism. Obviously, this means that Granger can’t go undercover in this case. As Cory puts it, it would be like sending a junkie into a drug den. So, Jamie is the one who gets a job working at the occult shop and pretending to be into Satanism.

How bad is Jamie at working undercover? Well, let’s ignore the fact that there’s no way in Hell anyone would ever believe that bland, boring, mild-mannered Jamie is into the occult. Instead, let’s talk about the fact that, at one point, Jamie stands in the middle of an aisle of the occult store, where anyone could hear her, and she calls Granger to tell him everything that she’s overheard. Seriously, she couldn’t step outside to do that? Later, when Granger unexpectedly show’s up at the Witch’s Brew coffeehouse, Jamie confront him by loudly asking, “Are you trying to take my case!?” despite the fact that they’re surrounded by the people that Jamie is supposed to be secretly investigating.

This really is a terrible episode for Jamie. When Granger is feeling guilty over the death of Tim (who died shortly after Granger convinced him to give his soul to the Devil), Jamie tells him to stop it with the “self-pity.” Uhmm, Jamie …. didn’t we just spend two episodes listening to you going on and on about growing up in the foster system? Jamie’s not in a position to talk. Jamie then ends up sleeping with Granger, though the show suggests that Jamie’s actions were largely due to the influence of being around magic.

Anyway, it turns out the Satanists are planning on sacrificing a virgin witch on “Lucifer’s birthday.” Granger knows that he has to stop this sacrifice on his own so he gives his superiors a fake address to go to. Then Granger goes to the real sacrifice. Fortunately, Bobby Cruz follows him and shows up in time to help Granger shoot the bad Satanists and save the virgin’s life.

(For all the slut-shaming that goes on in this country, it’s not the sluts who end up getting sacrificed in stupid occult rituals. Promiscuity can save your life.)

With Bobby’s encouragement, Granger goes to Confession. “It’s been seven years since my last confession….” Uh-oh, this could take a while!

This episode deserves some credit for finally giving Granger a backstory. That said, this episode featured some of the least convincing occultists that I’ve ever seen and some of the lamest metaphysical dialogue this side of Baywatch Nights. Actually, if this had been an episode of Baywatch Nights, it would have been a lot more fun. As it is, it’s hard to buy into the idea that the forces of darkness could be defeated by a bunch of bicycle cops.

At one point, Bobby says that too many people have died because of pentagrams. Monica points at his crucifix and asks, “What about the Crusades?” I always find it funny how people seem to think that bringing up something that happened during the Middle Ages is some sort of flex. Bobby could have just as easily replied, “What about Baal worship, you heathen!?” I’m a little upset that he didn’t. That would have been fun.

Oh well. At least this episode had a horror theme. October is just a day away!

Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell: The New Class 2.20 “Drinking 101”

Posted on September 29, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00. The show is currently on Prime.

It’s time for the Bayside Gang to learn a lesson!

Episode 2.20 “Drinking 101”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 19th, 1994)

It’s school trip time! Mr. Belding, Screech, the Gang, and a bunch of anonymous Bayside students are spending a week at a ski lodge!

Rachel thinks the ski lodge is romantic but Brian doesn’t care about any of that. He just wants to ski. (“I have not skied since I lived in Switzerland,” he says and, for not the first time, I find myself wondering if the show is ever going to explain why he no longer lives in Switzerland.) Lindsay wants to go to a frat party, even if it means lying and saying that she’s a college student. And Mr. Belding …. he just wants to survive.

It won’t be easy because Belding sprains his ankle as soon as he arrives at the ski lodge. “My chief!” Screech yells in an early use of the falsetto that will define his character in later seasons. Belding is supposed to stay off his ankle so, of course, Screech keeps tripping over him and dragging him up the slopes. As a dancer, I more than know the pain of a sprained ankle and the scenes of Screech reinjuring Belding’s ankle did not make me smile.

While Screech throws a party for Mr. Belding, Lindsay, Rachel, and Megan sneak into a frat party so they can meet some boys. (Yes, Rachel is dating Brian but she’s mad because all he wants to do is ski.) Tommy, Bobby, and Brian soon end up at the same party. Lindsay gets drunk. Tommy gets drunk. Tommy rides off on a skimobile and later has an accident.

Lesson learned!

Tommy has a broken leg. His parents could totally sue the school district for not keeping an eye on him during a school trip. Screech trips over Tommy’s cast, causing Tommy incredible pain. Belding tells Lindsay and Tommy that they shouldn’t have been drinking and then he tells Rachel, Brian, Megan, and Bobby that they shouldn’t have let Lindsay and Tommy drink. Hey, Belding, maybe you should have brought along more adults so they could keep an eye on the students.

Myself, I rarely drink because my tolerance for alcohol is pathetically low. Still, I have to say that I found it funny that Lindsay woke up with the “worst hangover ever!” even though she only had two beers. Even with my low tolerance, I’ve never had a hang over. From my experience, it would have been more realistic for Lindsay to throw up and then fall asleep on a yoga mat.

Anyway, this episode ends with Belding and Tommy recovering from their injuries, the rest of the Gang “grounded for the weekend,” and Screech skiing. I was kind of hoping the episode would end with the ski lodge being revealed to be the one that Lorena’s father owned on California Dreams. That would have been a cross-over to remember!

The big problem with this episode — and really, this is something that seem to happen in every Peter Engel-produced teen sitcom — is that the actors were obviously having way too much fun pretending to be drunk. I mean, hangover or not, Lindsay seemed to be having a good time.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 6.10 “Fallout”

Posted on September 28, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, Bobby learns a lesson and the Getraer family has a crisis!

Episode 6.10 “Fallout”

(Dir by Nicholas Sgarro, originally aired on December 19th, 1982)

Ellen Getraer (Lynn-Holly Johnson), the never-before-mentioned daughter of Sgt. Getraer, has fallen in with a bunch of Episcopalians and is planning to protest a nuclear plant with them. The only problem is that the church bus has bad brakes, and it keeps causing accidents on the highway. Personally, I would have thrown that smarmy Rev. Porter (John Elerick) in prison, but instead the Highway Patrol just gives him a ticket at the first accident and, at the second, they help him and the protesters escape from their burning bus. (Ellen helps too.) At the end of the episode, both Porter and Ellen do get arrested while sitting in front of the nuclear plant, but they’re released soon afterwards. Sgt. Getraer is proud of his daughter for sticking up for what she believes in. And I’m sure he’ll probably remove the arrest from her record when no one’s watching.

This episode was actually more about Bobby Nelson learning how to control his temper while performing crowd control. At a training exercise, for instance, he throws a fit when Bruce brings up the name of his ex-girlfriend. All of this probably would have been more effective if we had previously seen any evidence of Bobby having any sort of temper. Ever since he was first introduced, Bobby has come across as something of a mellow airhead. Anyway, Bobby learns how to control that supposedly fearsome temper, and he does a good job at the nuclear protest. He makes his arrests politely and courteously. As a result, the plant workers (one of whom is played by a young Dennis “Mr. Belding” Haskins) can go to work.

The other big storyline was Ponch and Nelson arriving at the scene after young Louis Hindall (Adam Rich) is hit by a car. You would think this would be especially difficult for Ponch, seeing as how his fiancée was hit and killed by a drunk driver just two weeks ago. But Ponch never mentions her. Instead, he gets upset when he sees the bruises on Louis’s back and realizes that the boy is being abused by his mom’s new boyfriend, Hal (Paul Tulley).

Later, at the hospital, Hal overhears Ponch and Bobby talking about how Hal is an abuser, and he promptly takes off in his car. This leads to a high-speed chase and a fairly impressive stunt where Hal’s car somehow goes airborne and rolls across the top of a trailer. It’s kind of amazing that, while being chased by the cops, Hal’s first instinct was to turn into a lot full of cars that he could crash into.

Finally, upon learning that the LAPD has changed their height requirements, mechanic Harlan Arliss (played by 5’2″ Lou Wagner) puts in for a transfer. Unfortunately, he fails the physical because his eyesight isn’t 20/20. Ponch tells him that with the LAPD, he would have just been another cop. But with the Highway Patrol, he’s the world’s greatest mechanic. Awwww!

At one point, Ponch opens his locker and the inside of it is covered with pictures of women. But there’s no picture of his dead fiancée. Have you no heart, Ponch!?

Retro Television Review: Crime Story 1.21 “Ground Zero”

Posted on September 28, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Crime Story, which ran on NBC from 1986 to 1988. The entire show can be found on Tubi!

This week, the first season comes to a close.

Episode 1.21 “Gound Zero”

(Dir by Peter Medak, originally aired on March 13th, 1987)

In Las Vegas, the media is focused on two things: the upcoming atomic bomb test at Yucca Flats and the trial of Ray Luca.

Pauli, the star witness, is being kept in an underground bunker at an Air Force base. Danny comments on the fact that, if America and Russia do go to war and an atomic missile hits Nevada, Pauli would probably be the only survivor. It would be up to Pauli to repopulate the planet. Torello eventually allows Pauli’s girlfriend, Donna (Audrey Matson), to start visiting him. Donna says she loves Pauli. Torello shrugs.

Pauli keeps his end of the deal. He testifies against Luca. However, Frank Holman gives an interview outside the courtroom and tells the press that Luca was the king of organized crime in Las Vegas. The next day, the headline of the local newspaper announces that Luca was the “king of crime.” Disguising himself as the waiter assigned to deliver room service to the sequestered jury, Holman makes sure that the jurors see the headline. The trial judge has no choice but to declare a mistrial. As he walks out of the courtroom, Luca stops in front of Pauli and tells him, “You did what you had to do,” and apologizes for raping Donna.

In Vegas, Luca is upset to discover that gangster Nat Martino (James Russo) is moving in on his territory. Luca is prepared to go to war, but Manny Weisbrod informs Luca that he is to work with Martino. Weisbrod no longer has any confidence in Luca’s abilities. At the same time, Torello learns that Martino is actually an informant. Torello arranges for that information to get leaked to Luca. When Luca heads over to Martino’s favorite brothel, Torello and the other members of the MCU are waiting for him.

Breaking into Martino’s room, Luca manages to shoot and kill Martino before taking several bullets himself. Wounded, Luca escapes through a back window. Pauli, having decided that his place is with Luca, is there to pick him up and drive him out of town.

The next day, a bandaged Luca discovers that Pauli has driven him out to his latest hideout, a seemingly abandoned house in the desert. The house is full of mannequins. Luca looks at a chair and sees that it is the property of the Atomic Energy Commission. Realizing that they’re at Yucca Flats, Pauli and Luca run out to Pauli’s car. As they drive through the desert, a mushroom cloud blossoms in the distance.

And the episode ends!

Did Luca and Pauli escape the nuclear test? Hopefully, we’ll find out next week. I hope they did because it’s hard to imagine Crime Story without them. They were a great pair of villains.

The first season was good, if uneven. The pilot was outstanding, but some of the subsequent Chicago episodes seemed to lose their focus. Torello’s domestic drama was never as interesting as the show wanted it to be, and it took me a while to really warm up to David Abrams and his abrasive idealism. The other members of the MCU often felt like ciphers. (Even after 21 episodes, I still don’t feel like I know much about any of them beyond their almost cult-like loyalty to Torello.) But when the show moved to Vegas, things improved immeasurably. The glitz of Vegas worked perfectly for the show’s hyperreal style, and Stephen Lang’s performance in the role of David Abrams improved as well.

That said, Dennis Farina was the main strength of the first season. Farina played Torello as being intense, ruthless, and maybe just a little unhinged. The only real difference between Luca and Torello is that Torello carries a badge and Luca doesn’t have the Constitution holding him back. Otherwise, Luca really does represent Torello’s own dark side. In his pursuit of Luca, Torello isn’t just trying to enforce the law. He’s also trying to destroy the man that, had Torello not joined the police force, he could have become.

Next week, we’ll start the second season!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi: The Next Generation 3.12 “Holiday: Part Two”

Posted on September 27, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi: The Next Generation, which aired from 2001 to 2015! The series can be streamed on YouTube and Tubi.

This week, we finish up Christmas in Canada!

Episode 3.12 “Holiday Part Two”

(Dir by Philip Earnshaw, originally aired on December 17th, 2003)

Craig has no idea how to cheat.

It’s Christmas and he currently has two girlfriends. He’s scheduled to perform in Degrassi’s holiday pageant with Ashley. At the same time, he’s told Manny that he and Ashley have broken up. For Christmas, he buys gifts for both Ashley and Manny. Ashley gets a badass Ramones t-shirt. (Ashley reminds me a lot of myself). Manny gets a pink sweater and a skating bracelet. Foolishly, Craig leaves Ashley alone in his room and Ashley discovers the gift bags. She sees all of the gifts.

Later, at the Christmas pageant, she notices that Manny is wearing the bracelet. And she has a gift bag with the sweater in it! When Ashley asks Manny who gave her the gifts, Manny refuses to say. However, she does tell Ashley that she hopes Ashley can move on after losing Craig. Agck!

The holiday pageant does not go well for Craig. Ashley walks out on stage and slaps him. So much for their deut of All I Want For Christmas Is You. Joey later finds Craig sulking in the hallway. Joey tells him about the time that he cheated on Caitlin with Tessa Campanelli. Craig responds be telling Joey that he’s obviously still in love with Caitlin.

*sigh*

(By the way, that’s a sigh of frustration, not romance.)

Yes, this is the episode where Joey realizes that he’s still in love with Caitlin and dumps Sydney on Christmas Eve. The first time I saw this episode, I thought that the way that Joey rushed down to the airport and caught Caitlin before she left for Montreal was romantic. Rewatching it, I realized just how self-absorbed both Caitlin and Joey are. Joey treats Sydney like dirt, despite the fact that Sydney has spent months looking after his daughter, taking care of the house, and devoting almost all of her time to him. The show tries to turn Sydney into a villain but all she did was ask Joey’s ex-girlfriend to start trying to break into his house. To me, that seems pretty reasonable.

As for Caitlin, it’s hard to know where to even begin. When this show started, Caitlin was portrayed as being a largely down-to-Earth, mature human being. With this episode, Caitlin is suddenly transformed into a neurotic klutz. Suddenly, she’s slipping a love note through Joey’s mail slot and then getting stuck in the kitchen window when she tries to break in to retrieve it. That’s not the Caitlin who was previously on the show. I assume the show’s writers were trying to make her into an adorkable romantic comedy lead but, as it is, she just seems like someone who has an unhealthy hang-up on a guy who cheated on her in high school.

Oh well. I do appreciate that this was a Christmas episode. All of the snow looked lovely. That said, I will always feel bad for Ashley and Sydney. They both deserved a better holiday.

Retro Television Review: Law & Order 8.6 and Homicide 6.5 “Baby, It’s You”

Posted on September 27, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC! It can be viewed on Peacock.

This week, Homicide crosses over with Law & Order.

Law & Order 8.6 “Baby, It’s You”

(Dir by Edwin Sherin, originally aired on November 12th, 1997)

Homicide 6.5 “Baby, It’s You”

(Dir by Edwin Sherin, originally aired on November 14th, 1997)

In New York City, Lennie Briscoe (Jerry Orbach) and Rey Curtis (Benjamin Bratt) find themselves investigating the death of a 14 year-old model named Brittany Janeway. The daughter of plastic surgeon Steven Janeway (Tom Tammi) and his wife Gayle (Maureen Anderman), Brittany died after complaining to her father about abdominal pain. The medical examiner determines that, two weeks before her death, Brittany was sexually assaulted with such severity that it resulted in internal injuries that led to toxic shock.

When the detectives learn that Brittany was in Baltimore two weeks earlier, they call Lt. Giardello and ask if he can send two of his detectives to check on the family’s Maryland home. The job falls to Detective Munch, who is still angry over the fact that Briscoe once slept with his first wife. Munch asks Falsone (ugh!) to accompany him. When Munch and Falsone learn that the son of the Janeways’s New York housekeeper was seen in Baltimore on the night that Brittany was raped, they have a suspect. Danvers sends them to New York with one mission. Arrest the guy and bring him back to Baltimore to stand trial. Jack McCoy (Sam Waterston) is not happy about that. Because Brittany died in New York, he feels that it’s his case to prosecute. Because the rape that led to Brittany’s death happened in Baltimore, Danvers claims that it’s his case.

Of course, once the suspect is arrested, it turns out that he wasn’t the perpetrator. Instead, he was a witness. According to him, Brittany had already been raped by the time he arrived at the house. The suspicion immediately shifts to Dr. Janeway. When the doctor is arrested in Baltimore, McCoy heads down to Maryland to argue that the case should be tried in New York. Judge Andahl (Sagan Lewis), who was last seen getting Elijah Wood off of a murder charge, disagrees. However, she allows McCoy to be co-counsel with Danvers.

In a twist that will not surprise anyone who has ever seen an episode of Law & Order, it turns out that Brittany was not assaulted by her father. Instead, she was assaulted by her mother.

The last time Law & Order and Homicide did a cross-over, the emphasis was on Pembleton and Bayliss and their unorthodox interrogation technique running up against McCoy’s need for admissible evidence. This time, when McCoy goes down to Baltimore, he quickly befriends and starts to discuss life with — you guessed it! — Detective Paul Falsone! In fact, Pembleton and Bayliss are barely present in this cross-over. While Munch does get to engage in some fun passive-aggressive banter with Lennie Briscoe, this cross-over is ultimately all about Paul Falsone, the super detective who never makes a mistake.

Good Lord, why? WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE ABOUT FALSONE? Falsone is a boring character. We are five episodes into the sixth season and Falsone has been a major part of four of them. The veteran Homicide actors were pushed to the side so that Jon Seda could wander around and mutter his lines. I get that show was trying to appeal to fans of more action-orientated cop shows with the character of Falsone but, in what I’ve seen so far, Seda has not shown a hint of charisma in the role. The fact that Homicide keeps insisting that Falsone is the greatest detective in the history of detectives does not make the character any more intriguing.

This crossover was a disappointment, The story, which was obviously based on the JonBenet Ramsey case, was sordid simply for the sake of being sordid and the big reveal that the murderer was the mother was not quite the shocking moment that it was bult up to be. Anyone familiar with Law & Order could have guessed who the murderer was going to be. And then, on top of everything else — FALSONE!

This was not a good one.