Retro Television Review: Police Squad! 1.1 “A Substantial Gift (The Broken Promise)”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Police Squad!, which aired on ABC in 1982.  The show can be found on Netflix!

Today, we start a new show!  Produced, written, and directed by the comedy team of Jim Abrahams, David Zucker, and Jerry Zucker, Police Squad! was the group’s follow-up to Airplane!  It only aired for six episodes but it went on to inspire The Naked Gun films.  Netflix just added the show so I figured why not?  We could all use a few laughs on Thursday.

Episode 1.1 “A Substantial Gift (The Broken Promise)”

(Dir by Jim Abrahams, David Zucker, and Jerry Zucker, originally aired on March 4, 1982)

In debt to her orthodontist, credit union teller Sally Decker (Kathryn Leigh Scott) stages a robbery by shooting her boss, Mr. Johnson (Terry Wills), and customer Ralph Twice (Russell Shannon). She claims that Twice robbed the place and shot Johnson, and then she shot Twice. Sally probably would have gotten away with her scheme if not for the hard work of Lt. Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen).

Drebin, who also narrates in Nielsen’s trademark deadpan style, would rather be working the case of the naked models that someone in the city is dumping at local laundromats, but instead Drebin has been assigned to work the credit union robbery. (Drebin does still find time to pick up his laundry.) Drebin’s investigation takes him to the neighborhood “known as Little Italy,” and as Drebin and his boss, Ed Hocken (Alan North), drive to Mrs. Twice’s apartment, we spy the Colosseum in the background. (The apartment itself has a nice view of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.) After lab technician Ted Olson (Ed Williams) demonstrates the distance a bullet would travel by firing two through a stack of tapes of Barbara Walters interviews, Drebin realizes that Sally’s story doesn’t make sense. To be certain, Drebin recreates the crime from several different angles and ends up with a room full of dead bodies. Drebin also visits shoeshine boy/snitch Johnny (William Duell) and learns that Sally has a long criminal history. (After Drebin leaves, a member of the Episcopal clergy pays Johnny to explain life after death. Good luck, Anglican.)

Drebin confronts Sally and it leads to a shootout. Drebin ducks behind a bench. Two feet away, Sally ducks behind a trashcan. Sally fires her gun until she runs out of bullets. She throws the gun at Drebin. Drebin also runs out of bullets and throws his gun at Sally. Eventually, Ed Hocken arrives and arrests Sally.

Later, at the station, Drebin and Ed share a laugh over Sally’s fate and the episode ends with freeze frame! Or it would, except Ed and Drebin both struggle to hold their expressions through the end credits….

And so went the first episode of Police Squad! It’s a funny episode, one that works because of both the absurd humor (there’s an extended elevator gag in which Drebin and Ed have a deadpan conversation while the police station’s elevator door opens to reveal a ballroom and then a pool) and the way it perfectly captures the feel of the old cop shows. A few years ago, I watched every episode of the second Dragnet series on MeTV and I immediately recognized what Police Squad was satirizing with its narration and its rather simple murder case. As with most of the work of Jim Abrahams and the Zucker Brothers, it works because no one acknowledges the jokes. I should also note that there’s probably nothing more boring than trying to explain why a joke works or why it doesn’t.

Police Squad only ran for six episodes and was canceled because network executives felt that audiences were confused by the show’s style of humor. (The Naked Gun films were spun off from Police Squad and recycled many of the show’s same jokes. They were hits.) I read about the show while reading Surely You Can’t Be Serious: The True Story of Airplane! When I saw that all six episodes had been added to Netflix, I decided to make it our latest Retro Television Review.

For the next few weeks, join us every Thursday for Police Squad!

Lisa Marie Review The Amazing Race 39.8 “Million Dollar Moves”


“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

That was my reaction last night when Phil told Matt & Michelle that they had been eliminated from the race.

Now, to be clear, it was pretty obvious from the minute that Matt & Michelle got lost while trying to find the detour that they would be the last team to arrive. They spent so much time searching for the market that almost all of the other teams got an almost insurmountable lead on them. The Double U-Turn didn’t help, but I think, even without the U-turn, Matt and Michelle would have struggled to catch up. That’s actually one of the things that I like about The Amazing Race. Even the strongest team can have a bad day and get lost. Unlike a show like Big Brother, where it’s pretty obvious that production always tips the scales for certain players, The Amazing Race is a show where sometimes it really does all come down to luck.

That said, I don’t agree with doing two Double U-turns in a row. Erin & Javi U-turned Matt & Michelle, even though they knew Matt & Michelle were running far behind. Anne-Marie & Riley U-turned Daisha & Dalton because Little Miss Let’s Help Each Other is still crying because Daisha & Dalton didn’t share the solution to a roadblock in Albania. When Christie & Colin ran the race back in Season 5, they refused to U-turn anyone, and it’s one reason why they’re one of my favorite teams. I’m not a fan of kicking people while they’re down.

This episode felt like it was all about kicking Matt & Michelle while they were down. From the constant shots of the other teams chortling over Matt & Michelle being in last place to Phil once again reminding us that it’s been a long time since a team of two women has won The Amazing Race, one got the feeling that the show’s producers failed to predict that most viewers would prefer the unapologetically competitiveness of Matt & Michelle to the forced plastic positivity of Anne-Marie and Riley. At the Pit Stop, Anne-Marie pointed out that no mother-daughter team had ever won before. I’d love it if a mother-daughter team won. My mom and I used to joke about trying out for the show together, and we really should have because America would have loved my mom. But I would prefer that the first mother-daughter team to win not be made up of two totally annoying fakes who have spent the entire race begging other teams to help them.

(As soon as I saw that the teams were going to have to take part in a martial arts exhibition to receive their next clue, I said, “Riley’s going to brag about being an expert.” Two minutes later, Riley bragged about being an expert. Did you know Riley was a Marine? She tells us that every episode. I had no idea that the Marines did so many photo shoots.)

One final note: I would be happy to see a new rule put in place that teams cannot share answers with each other. It makes for boring television.

So, with Matt & Michelle gone, here is where we stand at the end of the eighth leg.

Anne-Marie & Riley came in first. I am so sick of these two, but you probably already guessed that. When Riley asked Javi to let her and her mom have first place, I nearly threw a shoe at the TV.

Erin & Javi came in second. Good for them. They’re growing on me.

Conner & Garrett came in third. With Matt & Michelle gone, these two are my new favorites. As opposed to Anne-Marie and Riley, their positivity feels genuine.

Daisha & Dalton came in fourth. I actually like these two, but the other teams seem to have it out for them. I’m just hoping that Anne-Marie & Riley get eliminated first.

Ali & Joanna came in fifth. They’re a good team, but they always seem like they should be stronger than they are. I’d probably like them more if they hadn’t taken a knee during our national anthem. If you can’t stand up for America, I really can’t root for you.

Anuar & Andrea came in sixth. This wasn’t a great showing for them, but with Matt & Michelle so far behind, it really didn’t matter.

Matt & Michelle came in last and were eliminated. They got lost and never recovered. They were still the best team this season.

Next week, I’ll be hoping for the best for Conner & Garrett. With the strongest team no longer in the race, it’s time to root for the most likable team.

Lisa Marie Takes A Look At Survivor 51.8 “Load The Ark, Two By Two”


Well, here I am. I’m a year older and I’m still watching Survivor and The Amazing Race. Jeff & I are spending this week and the next at Lake Texoma so my next few reviews might be shorter than usual but, that said, I wouldn’t miss these two shows for anything.

Last night’s episode of Survivor was everything that I love and hate about this show.

On the one hand, the show introduced one of those sudden twists that altered strategy for the day. The castaways were required to pair off and compete for immunity as a team. That meant that not only would two teammates be safe at tribal council but also that two would be voted off. This is exactly the type of twist that always annoys the heck out of me. With the amount of interesting people that the show has this season, why be in such a hurry to get rid of them?

The pairs were: Mike & Maggie, Christian & Carter, Thien An & Eric, Devin & Jelly (of course), Kilby & Kristin, and Lewis & Sharonda. Most of the players paired up strategically. Mike and Eric, who everyone wants to vote out, paired up with the relatively popular Maggie and Thien An. Lewis paired up with Sharonda because, wisely, he saw that she was a determined competitor who just needed someone to encourage her. Devin and Jelly teamed up because Jelly is in love with Devin and Devin is too stupid to realize that teaming up with her would just confirm everyone’s suspicions that they were an unbreakable pair.

The immunity challenge was a grueling, three-part competition that was ultimately won by Lewis and Sharonda. Devin & Jelly, as they always do during challenges, came on strong at the beginning but then fell apart at the very end. Eric, for his part, spent the challenge getting on everyone’s nerves. I’m sure there was some tricky editing involved but I laughed out loud at the montage of everyone getting annoyed with Eric.

At tribal council, Devin & Jelly were the obvious targets but Jelly—having been warned by Sharonda—played her immunity idol. The idol protected both her and her teammate. (This is where I get annoyed. I don’t mind the idol protecting the person who found it but allowing it to also protect their partner didn’t feel right to me.) Christian, who had an extra vote that he gave to Eric for some reason, played his Shot in the Dark and—IT WORKED! I think this is the second time that I’ve ever seen a Shot in the Dark actually work. Christian was safe and so was his teammate Carter. (Again, this just didn’t feel right to me. Christian sacrificed his Shot in the Dark while Carter did nothing but Carter was still safe from the vote.)

Devin & Jelly received ten votes but none of them counted. Carter and Christian received one vote and it didn’t count. Kristin and Kilby received one vote and became the first two jury members. (Brady, who was voted out last week, had to leave the jury due to a medical emergency.)

What I loved about this episode was that tribal council was messy and exciting. Though I don’t think either Devin or Carter should have been safe as a result, I respected that Jelly played her idol at the right time and that Christian took a risk that paid off. (That said, Carter probably would have just played his idol if Christian’s Shot in the Dark hadn’t worked.) Kristin has always struck me as being the HR Lady from Hell so I’m not sorry to see her leave. What sucks is that Kilby, one of the most genuinely interesting players on the beach, had to go down with her because of the stupid pairs twist.

But that’s Survivor!

The other big news from this episode was that Carter formed the Salt Alliance, with him, Lewis, Kilby, Thien An, Christian, and Maggie. It seems like it could be a strong alliance (even though they are now down a member) but Carter might want to be careful about coming on too strong.

We’ll see what happens next week!

Join #TubiThursday For Enter The Ninja!


Hi, everyone!  Tonight, on Mastodon, I will be hosting the #TubiThursday watch party!  Join us for Enter The Ninja!

You can find the movie on Tubi and YouTube and you can join us on Mastodon at 9 pm central time!  (That’s 10 pm for you folks on the East Coast.)  We will be using #TubiThursday hashtag!  See you then!

Song of the Day: Got To Get You Into My Life, performed by Joe Pesci


It’s often forgotten that, before he became an award-winning actor, Joe Pesci pursued careers as both a stand-up comedian and a singer.  Here he is, performing a lounge version of The Beatles’ Got To Get You Into My Life for his 1968 album, Little Joe Sure Can Sing!

Scenes I Love: How is Tommy DeVito funny from Goodfellas


Today’s scene that I love comes from 1990’s Goodfellas.  This iconic scene was largely improvised by Joe Pesci and Ray Liotta.  Reportedly, Pesci based the scene on an actual incident that he observed.

It’s also interesting to note that Tommy’s comment of “you might fold under pressure” turns out to be true.

4 Shots From 4 Odd Films


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films.  As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films is all about letting the visuals do the talking.

Today, we take a moment to honor films that leave you wondering what’s real and what’s merely a dream.  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Surreal Films

Inland Empire (2006, dir by David Lynch)

Inland Empire (2006, dir by David Lynch)

Borgman (2013, dir by  Alex van Warmerdam)

Borgman (2013, dir by Alex van Warmerdam)

A Field in England (2013, dir by Ben Wheatley)

A Field in England (2013, dir by Ben Wheatley)

Goodbye to Language (2014, dir by Jean-Luc Godard)

Goodbye to Language (2014, dir by Jean-Luc Godard)

Music Video of the Day: Your Phone’s Off The Hook But You’re Not by X (1980, dir by ????)


Look at Billy Zoom go!

This video was shot for a CBS show called No Holds Barred.  According to the video description on YouTube, the show was “short-lived.”

Enjoy!

Film Review: Warfare (dir. by Ray Mendoza & Alex Garland)


“Just hang in there. You’re not alone, man.” — Mac

In Warfare, staying alive is a full-time job, and nobody gets a moment off. Ray Mendoza and Alex Garland’s 2025 film builds its tension around that exhausting reality, stripping away most of the familiar comforts of a Hollywood war movie. There are no reassuring pauses for personal revelations, no grand speeches that suddenly make the suffering meaningful, and little room to admire the action from a safe emotional distance. Instead, the film concentrates on the relentless effort of getting through one disastrous situation. It is gripping, frequently overwhelming, and much more interested in the cost of survival than the excitement of combat.

The story follows members of two American Navy SEAL teams during a 2006 operation in Ramadi, Iraq. After occupying a civilian home and establishing surveillance positions, the men come under attack and find themselves struggling to evacuate their wounded. Mendoza participated in the actual incident, and his collaboration with Garland gives the film a tightly restricted perspective. Rather than explaining the war or constructing an elaborate military adventure, Warfare recreates what these men experienced and endured in real time. The assignment, the attack, and the effort to get out become almost the entire world of the movie.

That narrow focus takes some getting used to. The early scenes offer little of the character-building shorthand audiences might expect: nobody needs to display a family photograph or explain what brought him into the military. Instead, the men reveal themselves through routines, exchanges, and the way they work together. It can initially be difficult to tell everyone apart, which is both a deliberate feature and a genuine drawback. The film wants us to understand a functioning unit before we understand its individual members. That makes sense for its approach, although it occasionally keeps the characters at arm’s length.

What comes through clearly, however, is how much effort goes into simply maintaining control. Watching a street, monitoring a window, listening to instructions, and staying ready all become sources of tension. The quieter passages are not empty space before the “real movie” begins. They establish the concentration required before anything has visibly gone wrong. Garland and Mendoza make waiting feel active without constantly forcing suspense through obvious tricks. You start scanning the frame because the soldiers are scanning their surroundings, and the longer that continues, the more you realize that being prepared is not the same thing as being safe.

Once the attack begins, the film makes that distinction brutally clear. Training gives the men ways to respond, but it does not protect them from confusion, injury, or the limits of their own bodies. Plans become harder to carry out, information becomes difficult to process, and ordinary movements demand frightening amounts of effort. There is very little of the satisfying clarity that turns a complicated action sequence into an impressive display of competence. Here, competence matters precisely because everything is becoming unmanageable. The soldiers keep working, but the movie never suggests that doing everything correctly guarantees a good outcome.

The staging gives those struggles a physical weight. Rooms that seemed useful become cramped holding areas; doorways become dangerous thresholds; short stretches of exposed ground become enormous obstacles. The audience gradually learns enough about the location to appreciate why moving an injured person is not a simple matter of picking him up and running. Every action depends on other actions happening first. Someone has to communicate, someone has to provide cover, and someone has to make a decision with incomplete information. Survival becomes collective labor, and the film is strongest when it shows just how difficult that labor can be.

Sound does much of the heavy lifting. Gunfire, explosions, radio chatter, strained voices, and cries of pain create an atmosphere that feels crowded even when the image itself is relatively contained. Without a conventional musical score guiding every emotional shift, the audience has to sit with those sounds rather than receive an easy cue about how to process them. The wounded soldiers’ suffering is particularly hard to hear because it does not conveniently disappear between dramatic beats. Pain remains present while other people issue instructions and try to solve practical problems. That persistence makes the violence feel consequential rather than decorative.

The performances support this approach. D’Pharaoh Woon-A-Tai, playing Mendoza, provides an important point of connection without turning the film into a one-man showcase. Cosmo Jarvis, Will Poulter, Charles Melton, and the rest of the ensemble fit into the same collective rhythm. Their best moments often involve listening, struggling to respond, or concentrating on something that has suddenly become terribly difficult. The actors make cooperation believable without leaning on speeches about loyalty. Concern shows up in what the men do for each other, particularly when helping somebody requires them to stay focused through fear and distress.

The Iraqi family whose home becomes the soldiers’ position adds another layer of unease. For the Americans, the building is a place from which to carry out an assignment. For the family, it is their living space, now occupied by armed men and exposed to violence. The film does not need to step away from the central incident to make that distinction register. Their frightened presence changes how we see the rooms and the activity inside them. Although they remain less developed than the soldiers, they prevent the location from feeling like an anonymous battlefield built only to contain American suffering.

The same restraint applies to the wider political circumstances. Explaining the Iraq War is not what Warfare sets out to do, and treating that absence as a failure would mean judging it against a different film. Its purpose is to reconstruct the teams’ experience as it unfolds, not interrupt it with hindsight or historical explanation. The more useful question is whether that reconstruction feels coherent and immediate. For the most part, it does. The restricted perspective keeps us alongside the men as their options narrow, making the next instruction, movement, or decision more urgent than anything outside the moment.

Even with some emotional distance between the audience and individual characters, Warfare is an impressive piece of filmmaking. Its precision, ensemble performances, and punishing sound design make survival feel like something achieved through exhausting, imperfect effort rather than heroic inevitability. The lack of conventional backstories sometimes limits our attachment, but the men’s dependence on one another gives the film its emotional center. Mendoza and Garland refuse the easy satisfaction of turning endurance into triumph. When the fighting finally loosens its grip, the film leaves behind no comfortable sense that anyone has won. Getting out alive is the ending, not the happy ending.