Hell’s Kitty: ChainSaw Kitty Video


Y’all remember when I previewed Hell’s Kitty: Movie Preview, Review and Trailer Well, we got a bit more to see!

Actually, there is a terrifying music video to go a long with it!

ABOUT THE SONG – CHAINSAW KITTY

The writer / director Nicholas Tana (Sticky: A (Self) Love Story), who also appears in the film, worked closely with the Hell’s Kitty composer, Richard Albert (Losing Touch), to create music for the film that properly reflects the movie’s antagonist, Angel. Angel is a cute and loving cat with an evil, jealous side to her often onerous personality, both supernatural and schizophrenic. CHAINSAW KITTY, was written, performed, and recorded by Richard Albert(Losing Touch) with lyrics by Nicholas Tana (Sticky: A (Self) Love Story). The song was originally intended for a scene with Lou Ferrigno (The Incredible Hulk), in which the cat’s claws turned into chain saws. Though that particular scene was never shot, the creators, Nicholas Tana, and producer Denise Acosta, loved the music enough to include it in another scene involving Ashley C. Williams (The Human Centipede) and Barbara Nedeljakova (Hostel), rocking out to it on all fours! *via press release

Here, you can see this awesomely terrifying video:

 

BTW: Puuurrchase this movie as soon as you can! 

“Hell’s Kitty” will be available on VOD March 13th and on DVD March 27th!

Something You Should also know:

To kick of the movie release and to share their love for cats, the creators behind the film teamed with HOLLYSHORTS MONTHLY SCREENINGS and the TLC CHINESE THEATER recently hosted a premiere at the legendary theatre to raise money for FixNation.org. FixNation provides a free, full-time spay/neuter clinic with two full-time veterinarians capable of sterilizing as many as 100 cats per day. They also help hundreds of cats find suitable homes. For more info on the cause click here!  http://fixnation.org/

The Cloverfield Paradox – *Great Spoilers*


 

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It’s Superbowl Sunday!!! Better yet, it’s The Cloverfield Paradox on Netflix.

This movie is 1 part – Event Horizon, 1 Part – The Thing, and 1 Part – Boring.

We begin with a dying earth and pesky scientists have tried to create a free energy machine innnnnnnn spaaaaaaace.  Sounds Legit.

There’s British people talking in traffic and I need closed captioning.  The lady in traffic is apparently an astronaut and “Comm Officer”. However, I can’t understand anything she’s saying; so maybe, communications wasn’t the best fit?!

We’re on the space station and they’re trying to do some particle acceleratin’ …woohoo, but something is amiss. The story is really dragging.

Now, there’s nerds, foozball playing, and awkward conversation.  Are we sure this is a Space Station and not the Google Campus?  I do like that all peoples are represented and they’re all boring.  It’s about time that we embraced that most people are boring and even some Netflix films.

They’re about to turn on their Shepherd Accelerator and …… they are making particles, energy, or s’mores?  Then, the Shepherd overloads.  I’m guessing they forgot to use a surge protector. They get control, but the earth is gone- must’ve left the Earth in their other solar system’s pants.  They’re hurtling into empty space.

The crew is starting to act weird.  The Russian- I’m going to call him Boris – is playing with his face a lot and we’re getting an Event Horizon vibe mostly because JJ Abrams decided to defile the memory of another one of my favorite films.  The steel walls have screaming and they decide to open it….because sure. They reveal a woman fused to wires and the bulkhead who knows the Comm Officer’s name.  It’s pretty gross.  They try to do some ER work on her and she lives.

Meanwhile….Back on Earth. There’s explosions!!!

Back on the station…

The foozball is playing itself and things are disappearing: gyroscopes, worms, and my time.   Boris has a worm creature in his head and it’s doing gross things to his eyeball.  Boris starts talking to himself and the voices in his head ask him to make a 3d printed gun.  Boris pulls the 3d printed gun on crewmates and dies with hundreds of worms shooting out of him.

The lady they found in the bulkhead – Mina – wakes up.  She thinks that she was on the station the whole time.  Mina accuses Schmidt of sabotage.  For scientists, they are unimpressive.  These dopes haven’t figured out that they’re in another dimension?! Did they get their PhDs from University of Phoenix?!  They lock Schmidt up for sabotage and proceed to make bad choices.

Back on earth…. More explosions, but now there are screaming kids.

Back on the station: The ship’s Irish janitor is doing repairs and his arm gets detached.  The ship let’s Schmidt out of the airlock and he’s being chased by the Irishman’s arm.  The arm writes them a letter….really. It tells them to cut Boris’ corpse open.  They find the gyroscope inside Boris.  The comms come back and their current reality is pretty bad.  They watch CNN and learn that they’ve traveled to Another Dimension …. Another Dimension … Don’t … you tell me to smile….Interplanetary.   In this dimension, there’s World War III going on and everybody has goatees.  They decide to turn on the Shepherd machine again and hopefully not attract a herd of sheep as well.

Back on earth, the Comm Officer’s husband has rescued a random kid and went to a bomb shelter.

Back on the Station:  Tam figures out that condensation was messing with their calculations, but then she drowns….somehow.  In the alternate dimension, Eva’s kids are alive.  In the “Good Dimension” Eva apparently installed some bad track lighting and killed everyone, but in this “Evil Dimension” – they’re fine because she used lamps I suppose.  Eva decides to go back to warn her twin not to use track lighting…..ever.  I’ve noticed that they do A LOT of caulking in this movie to exciting music, but it’s still a guy caulking. There’s another malfunction and half the ship explodes.

The crew decides that they need to de-couple the broken part of the station, engendering a long scene of attempted space station repair.  It was really slow AND they had this crazy 8-4pm window to do it.  Then, the captain sacrifices himself to do it because why not?

Eva orders that they turn on the shepherd.  All looks well, but Mina steals the gun and starts shooting.  She needs the “firing key” for some reason.  Presumably, the Shepherd will create energy, but that really makes no sense because it doesn’t create energy as much as derivative B-Movies.  Mina manages to kill Eva in the final scene Aliens style and it’s mildly entertaining.

Schmidt lives and they start the Shepherd again, but first she warns her evil twin not to use Track Lighting and to give the ball to Marshawn Lynch in the 2015 Super Bowl.  They see earth again- the good earth and they have a stable power beam.   Eva’s husband doesnt want them to come back because—-monsters.  Then, as the escape pod enters the atmosphere, we see a monster.  So, they unleashed monsters and NBC’s Whitney.

This was a great bad movie, which is what JJ Abrams can do in his sleep. I would watch this if I had the flu or was in a B-movie place.

The Lullaby: Preview, Review and trailer


Remember that sweet song your Mother sang to you as a child?

Poster

Cast:

Reine Swart as Chloe van Heerdon

Brandon Aruret as Dr. Timothy Reed

Shayla-Rae McFarlane as young Chloe

Preview:

Chloe is overwhelmed by the birth of her first child. The incessant crying of her baby, the growing sense of guilt and paranoia sends her into depression. With a heightened urge to protect her son, Chloe sees danger in every situation. She starts to hear voices, the humming of a childhood lullaby and sees flashes of a strange entity around her child. Convinced that the entity is real, Chloe will do everything in her power to protect her son. Is she haunted by evil or is it just the baby blues?

Review:

index Oh, Child, we got so much to talk about! Your Mama is not crazy, you are! Or are you? Or was you just twisting my mind?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Or is your Mom really crazy!

 

 

 

 

pic 3 Or your Grandma?

 

That sweet little song you Mom sang to you as a child… you know… that comforting song that always puts you into dream land… yeah, this movie might make you sleep different tonight!

Credits:

Uncork’d Entertainment presents a Phoenix Film with Valhalla Productions Directed by Darrell James Roodt

 

Trailer:

 

Would I recommend this movie:

Yep, absolutely! One of the best horror/thriller movies I have seen this year!

Where can you see it?

The Lullaby is opening in theaters and on VOD March 2, 2018

Oh, BTW:

No Spoilers, but Chloe is back….

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Curse Of The Witch’s Doll: Movie preview, review, and trailer.


Director:

Lawrence Fowler

Stars:

Helen Crevel: as Adeline Grey

Michelle Archer: as Doris

Claire Carren: as The Witch

Preview:

Adeline Gray’s attempt to escape bombing in her home town leads her to a derelict, creepy manor in the woods. When Adeline’s young daughter goes missing during a game of hide-and-seek, a series of inexplicable events lead her to believe a haunted doll holds a vengeful soul; the soul of a murdered Witch. As Adeline’s desperate search for her daughter continues, it soon becomes clear; to have any hope of being reunited, she must defeat the curse of The Witch’s Doll.

Review:

Straight up, I am not going lie, this movie messed me up! It hit on everything I find scary. From a lost child, to a deranged asylum, to a possessed doll, to a demonic witch. I went into a comfortable Sunday afternoon, now, to looking around every corner at everything.

 

Should you dare watch this movie I am certain you will be just as afraid as I am right now!

While you watch, remember to look over your shoulder at all times!

 

If you dare, the trailer is right here!

 

Credits:

Curse Of The Witch’s Doll is a High Octane Pictures production, Directed by Lawrence Fowler.

And if you dare again:

Curse Of The Witch’s Doll Will be available on VOD February 6th, 2018, DVD March 6th, 2018 and SVOD June 5th, 2018

Also, remember:

“Her soul lives on”

Bad Apples: Movie preview and review


BAD APPLES-KEY ART-FLAT_preview

Stars:

Brea Grant (“Dexter”, A Ghost Story)

Graham Skipper (Beyond the Gates)

Andrea Collins (The Hospital)

Danielle Reverman (Infernal)

Plot:

It’s Halloween night, and two “bad apples” decide to play some wicked tricks on the one house in a suburban cul-de-sac that is not celebrating Halloween. They terrorize a young couple in their home and these tricks become increasingly more sinister as the night progresses, finally ending in a Halloween the entire neighborhood will never forget.

Review:

Frankly, this movie is truly “Rotten to the core” And, by that, I mean I would eat every apple seed of this movie! Don’t ‘worm’ your way out of seeing it. (ok, done with the puns!)

Actually, I had a lot of fun watching this movie! And don’t the twins look so cute!

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In all fairness, this is one of the funniest horror comedies I have seen in a while!

 

Now, let’s all sit down and have a glass of…ummm… Apple cider (last pun):

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And watch the trailer!

Would I recommend this movie?

I seriously had fun watching it. So, if your gore-humor is like mine, then yeah, absolutely see it.

Credits:

This Bryan Coyne film is distributed via Uncork’d Entertainment and will be available on VOD February 6, 2018

Warning:

It does get a bit gory at times!

Creepy Crawlies: WILLARD (Cinerama 1971)


cracked rear viewer

Rats are not cute’n’cuddly little creatures. They’re disgusting, disease-infested vermin that should be avoided at all costs. But don’t tell that to WILLARD, title character in this 1971 chiller that started a regular revolution of “animals run amok” horror movies. Bruce Davison, later to become one of his generation’s finest actors (SHORT EYES, THE LATHE OF HEAVEN, LONGTIME COMPANION), is a regular rodent Dr. Doolittle here, not only talking to the animals, but handling them fondly while he trains them to kill his enemies. Rats – yuck!

Willard Stiles is a lonely loser who shares a rambling, decrepit manse with his  domineering mother (Elsa Lanchester) and works for bullying boss Martin (Ernest Borgnine ), who stole the family business from Willard’s late father. Office temp Joan (Sondra Locke) feels sorry for Willard, but the socially awkward nerd is uncomfortable around people, preferring instead to spend time with the rats in…

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House of Salem Movie preview and Review


Ok…… get this out of your system first…. Will you come out and play? I’ll answer that question later!*

House of Salem_Key Art_preview

Plot:

A group of kidnappers become a child’s unlikely protectors after discovering they have unwittingly been set up to take part in a satanic ritual. As they begin to uncover the truth of the house they find themselves trapped, they must battle demonic forces and uncover a legacy of over a hundred years of murder in the name of the Dev

 

Review:

I am not going to argue, I love Wild Eye Releasing  movies! And whenever I get a screener I really miss the days when us #SnarkAlecs would just sit back and watch a good Sci-Fi movie! And this is one of the movies I would be proud to be associated with!

This movie is awesome in the perfect way!

Would I recommend this movie?

Nope…Unless you just want a fun, snarkable movie! Then, YES!

Take your chances and look at the trailer now!

 

*Admit it… You want to come out and play Now!

House Of Salem will be available on January 23, 2018 on all your VOD devices!