Happy Labor Day from the Shattered Lens!
I’m not sure what this holiday celebrates. I guess it celebrates hard work but I rarely see humans working that hard. There’s so many hours during the day when humans should be paying attention to their cats but instead, they’re just hanging out in some office, store, or warehouse. Meanwhile, cats work 24 hours a day, patrolling our territory, searching for little rodents to leave on porches, bathing, controlling the bird population, and most importantly, taking naps. This weekend, while humans were either grilling or watching TV, a million cats were doing their job. You’re welcome.
So, to all of our human readers: enjoy your undeserved holiday while we cats continue to work hard to make sure that we’re all still here to celebrate in 2021.
(Note: Doc Bowman’s views do not necessarily reflect the views of Through the Shattered Lens, Unobtainium-13, or the Sandoc Corporation.)
Happy Father’s Day from the humans and the cat here at the Shattered Lens!
Admittedly, most male cats do not make for good fathers. But some humans do an okay of it and today, we wish them the best!
Happy St. Patrick’s Day from the Shattered Lens!
May all the Irish humans and all the Irish cats find peace this day!
Happy Friday the 13th!
Today is the greatest Friday of the year because today is the 13th! Some people consider Friday the 13th to be unlucky but those people have obviously never been the only virgin at a weekend party up at Camp Crystal Lake. Ask any of them and they can tell you just how lucky Friday the 13th can be.
Today, we are aware that many of our readers may be locked away in their homes, practicing social distancing or freaking out because they’ve been watching the 24-hour news stations. To you, we make the following suggestion: Turn off twitter. Turn off MSNBC. Turn off Fox. Definitely turn off CNN. And why not just sit back and enjoy the antics of those fun-loving kids up at Camp Crystal Lake?
In fact, in case you need help picking which movie to watch, the flame-haired one has reviewed every single one of them here on the Shattered Lens! She personally recommends that you watch parts 1, 2, and 4 but it’s totally up to you! Here’s some links to her reviews:
Friday the 13th
Friday the 13th Part 2
Friday the 13th Part 3
Friday The 13th: The Final Chapter
Friday the 13th: A New Beginning
Friday the 13th: Jason Lives
Friday the 13th Part VII: A New Blood
Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan
Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday
Freddy vs Jason
Friday the 13th: The Pointless Remake
And then be sure to check out: 12 Thing You May Not Have Known About Friday the 13th and then read the flame-haired one’s review of Camp Crystal Lake Memories!
The world will still be here when you get back, we promise.
Happy Friday the 13th everyone!
From the humans and the cat at the Shattered Lens to all of you, happy Valentine’s Day!
Some people, like the flame-haired one, love this day while the others, like almost all of the silly humans on twitters, hate this day. Of course, if you’re a cat, every day is Valentine’s Day!
Whether you’re celebrating, observing, or denouncing this day, here’s hoping that it’s a good one for you and all of your loved ones!
Today, we wish love and happiness to every single one of you. Over the last ten years, those of us here at the Shattered Lens have talked about the movies and the TV shows and the books and the music and the performers that we love but in the end, the most important love is the love that we have for each other and for those of you who have been kind enough to read our thoughts.
From the humans and the cat here at the Shattered Lens, thanks you!
Welcome, one and all, to Oscar Sunday on the Shattered Lens!
Oscar Sunday is an official holiday at the Shattered Lens Bunker and the humans who work here have got a lot planned for today! There’s going to be a potluck dinner. There’s going to be a horseshoe tournament out back. The flame-haired one even says that she’s going to try to hire a clown to come keep everyone entertained during the commercial breaks!
Maybe a clown like this one:
As for what you’ll be seeing on this site during today’s holiday, the TSL humans have got a lot planned for today! I think there might be some reviews and maybe some Oscar trivia. Whenever the ceremony ends, someone will probably post the end results so you can see how much money you made off of your Oscar predictions. It should be fun so enjoy the day and don’t forget to watch the Oscars tonight!
By the way, Matt Smith likes the clown too!
Happy Oscar Sunday!
The Courageous Cougars by 3. The other teams are good but this is the Cougars year.
The Kitten Bowl is airing on Hallmark today, just in case you need a break from watching all the humans run around.
(Photo by Erin Nicole)
You did it!
You survived 2019!
2019 was a year when humans everywhere proved that they should just be quiet and let cats run the planet. Well, 2019 is over now. It’s 2020 and hopefully, everyone will try to do better over the upcoming 12 months….
Of course, they probably won’t. This is going to be a crazy year, because the humans in America are having an election in November and it seems like 60% of them have already climbed up to the top of the tree and decided to try to jump back down to the patio without even bothering to estimate the distance of their fall!
So you know what?
When the outside world gets too insane or annoying or whatever, we want to provide a place for you to escape. This year, the TSL is 10 years old and the Shattered Lens humans have got a lot planned! They’re going to make 2020 a great, great year!
So, remember — when things get crazy and when everything just seems to be too weird to deal with, TSL is here for you!
Here’s what we have to look forward to in 2020: the Oscars! New films from Christopher Nolan, Ridley Scott, Edgar Wright, and Paul Greengrass! The next stage of the MCU! A thousand streaming services! Baby Yoda! The Many Saints of Newark! Cannes! Sundance! Theme months! Embracing the Melodrama! Back to School! Shattered Politics! 18 Days of Paranoia!
Welcome to 2020! Let’s make it great one and, when in doubt, look to the cats for wisdom!
(Photo by Erin Nicole)