Happy birthday, flame-haired one!
Happy birthday, flame-haired one!
Doc Bowman here with a very special holiday message!
Tomorrow is Halloween, which my owners — the flame-haired one and the nice one — says is the greatest time of the year! Usually, it’s the time when kids get candy, horror movies are on TV, and my owners get to play dress up or, if it’s anything like last year, barely get dressed at all. Thing may be a little bit different this year, though. There may not be as many people out because all the humans are supposed to be on lockdown and anyone who tries to have any sort of fun gets scolded faster than I get scolded for sharpening my claws on the living room drapes. There might not be as many trick or treaters this year but that doesn’t mean that people won[t be out and about.
That brings me to my point.
Halloween is a wonderful time but it’s also a time when stupid people do bad things. I’m a black cat so both the flame-haired and the nice-one say that I’m not going to be allowed go outside at all tomorrow. They say it doesn’t matter how much I beg, I’m staying inside. I know they’re doing the right thing but I’m still going to beg and knock things off of tables and counters because I’m a cat and that’s what I do. And they’re going to hopefully give me a lot of treats and pet me to keep me happy, even though they’ll probably have to lock me in the flame-haired one’s room to keep me from running for the front door every time they open it for a trick or treater. That’s just the way thing go at the cat’s house.
Tomorrow night, please make sure that all your pets are safely inside. It may sound like a silly concern but not everyone out there is as nice and wonderful as my owners and the people who read this site!
Have a safe and happy Halloween everyone!
Happy Labor Day from the Shattered Lens!
I’m not sure what this holiday celebrates. I guess it celebrates hard work but I rarely see humans working that hard. There’s so many hours during the day when humans should be paying attention to their cats but instead, they’re just hanging out in some office, store, or warehouse. Meanwhile, cats work 24 hours a day, patrolling our territory, searching for little rodents to leave on porches, bathing, controlling the bird population, and most importantly, taking naps. This weekend, while humans were either grilling or watching TV, a million cats were doing their job. You’re welcome.
So, to all of our human readers: enjoy your undeserved holiday while we cats continue to work hard to make sure that we’re all still here to celebrate in 2021.
(Note: Doc Bowman’s views do not necessarily reflect the views of Through the Shattered Lens, Unobtainium-13, or the Sandoc Corporation.)
Needs more cats.
Happy Friday the 13th!
Today is the greatest Friday of the year because today is the 13th! Some people consider Friday the 13th to be unlucky but those people have obviously never been the only virgin at a weekend party up at Camp Crystal Lake. Ask any of them and they can tell you just how lucky Friday the 13th can be.
Today, we are aware that many of our readers may be locked away in their homes, practicing social distancing or freaking out because they’ve been watching the 24-hour news stations. To you, we make the following suggestion: Turn off twitter. Turn off MSNBC. Turn off Fox. Definitely turn off CNN. And why not just sit back and enjoy the antics of those fun-loving kids up at Camp Crystal Lake?
In fact, in case you need help picking which movie to watch, the flame-haired one has reviewed every single one of them here on the Shattered Lens! She personally recommends that you watch parts 1, 2, and 4 but it’s totally up to you! Here’s some links to her reviews:
And then be sure to check out: 12 Thing You May Not Have Known About Friday the 13th and then read the flame-haired one’s review of Camp Crystal Lake Memories!
The world will still be here when you get back, we promise.
Happy Friday the 13th everyone!
From the humans and the cat at the Shattered Lens to all of you, happy Valentine’s Day!
Some people, like the flame-haired one, love this day while the others, like almost all of the silly humans on twitters, hate this day. Of course, if you’re a cat, every day is Valentine’s Day!
Whether you’re celebrating, observing, or denouncing this day, here’s hoping that it’s a good one for you and all of your loved ones!
Today, we wish love and happiness to every single one of you. Over the last ten years, those of us here at the Shattered Lens have talked about the movies and the TV shows and the books and the music and the performers that we love but in the end, the most important love is the love that we have for each other and for those of you who have been kind enough to read our thoughts.
From the humans and the cat here at the Shattered Lens, thanks you!
Welcome, one and all, to Oscar Sunday on the Shattered Lens!
Oscar Sunday is an official holiday at the Shattered Lens Bunker and the humans who work here have got a lot planned for today! There’s going to be a potluck dinner. There’s going to be a horseshoe tournament out back. The flame-haired one even says that she’s going to try to hire a clown to come keep everyone entertained during the commercial breaks!
Maybe a clown like this one:
As for what you’ll be seeing on this site during today’s holiday, the TSL humans have got a lot planned for today! I think there might be some reviews and maybe some Oscar trivia. Whenever the ceremony ends, someone will probably post the end results so you can see how much money you made off of your Oscar predictions. It should be fun so enjoy the day and don’t forget to watch the Oscars tonight!
Happy Oscar Sunday!