The writer Mary Shelley was born on this date in 1797. Shelley, of course, is best-known for writing Frankenstein, a book that some claim is the first science fiction novel. (That’s debatable but it was still a major literary achievement.)
In this scene from 1936’s Bride of Frankenstein, Elsa Lanchester appears as Mary Shelley, continuing her story. (Of course, Lanchester also played the Bride herself.)
4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films is all about letting the visuals do the talking.
These 4 Shots From 4 Films are dedicated to the memory of the great Maureen O’Hara.
4 Shots From 4 Maureen O’Hara Films
The Hunchback of Notre Dame (1939, dir by William Dieterle)
Dance, Girl. Dance (1940, dir by Dorothy Arzner)
Miracle on the 34th Street (1947, dir by George Seaton)
The Quiet Man (1952, dir by John Ford)
Sláinte!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!
This week, the gang joins the Glee Club!
Episode 3.3 “The Glee Club”
(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on December 23rd, 1990)
When Zack learns that the winners of a nationwide glee competition will get a trip to Hawaii, he demands that all of his friends join the Bayside Glee Club. The only problem is that Jessie is the only one who can sing, and she refuses to take off her face mask because she thinks she’ll catch COVID Lisa’s cold.
Luckily, Screech’s girlfriend Violet (Tori Spelling) can sing, but she can only do it if Screech is present and supporting her. After Screech acts like an idiot meeting her parents (he mentions that Violet’s mother looks like Arnold Schwarzenegger), Violet is told she’s no longer allowed to spend time around him. Violet will have to quit the Glee Club. Good thing Jessie can sing! Oh no! Jessie took off her face mask and caught Lisa’s cold.
This episode firmly established that Zack is not only a liar but a terrible liar, one who succeeds only because of the exaggerated stupidity of everyone around him. When Mr. Belding demands that Mr. Tuttle whip the Glee Club into shape, Zack’s solution is to tape another glee club’s performance and have Bayside lip-sync to it. Somehow, neither Belding nor Tuttle notices. Later, when the Glee Club performs at the competition, Zack plays the tape again. This time it gets screwed up. At first everyone is singing too fast, then too slow. “That was our impression of a glee club tuning up!” Zack says, and everyone buys it. You can call Zack’s behavior borderline sociopathic and you’ll have a point. But seriously: how dumb is every adult in Zack’s life?
Violet does eventually sing. Screech steps up to support her when she falters. Bayside wins the competition, even though they really should have been disqualified for all of that “tuning up” nonsense. Violet’s parents are so impressed by Screech’s support that they decide he can date their daughter. If I remember correctly, Violet disappeared after one more episode.
This episode does have one truly funny moment. When Jessie says she caught Lisa’s cold, everyone glares at Lisa. “Sorry,” Lisa says, in a tone that suggests she’s not that sorry. Lark Voorhies delivers the line perfectly. Otherwise the episode suffers because it revolves around two of the worst actors to ever grace the halls of Bayside. Any episode that features Screech’s love life is destined for cringe.
I spent this week binging Crime Story, St. Elsewhere, and Baywatch. My goal here is to write up three months worth of Retro Television Reviews over the next week so that I can devote all of September and October to horrorthon.
I also watched Big Brother 28. Thursday was the 1,000th episode of Big Brother. Since I’ve see every episode, I did the math and discovered that I have spent the equivalent of 43 days just watching Big Brother. That left me feeling very depressed.
On Friday, my friend Pat McCurry put together a tribute for Tim Curry and Dolly Parton. First, we watched a thoroughly forgettable 2000 sitcom called Bette. As you can guess from the title, it starred Bette Midler as herself. The episode that we watched featured Bette appearing on Dolly Parton’s Halloween special. Dolly was charming. The rest of the sitcom was pretty forgettable. We followed this with an episode of a 90s crime show called Wiseguy. Tim Curry played a crooked music producer. The show was serialized so I really couldn’t follow the plot but Curry gave a typically magnetic preformance.
Along with my binging, I also watched and reviewed CHiPs, Pacific Blue, 1st & Ten, Hunter, Sledge Hammer, and Saved By The Bell.
And I also watched a Republican Presidential Primary Debate from 1996! It was on YouTube. I liked that Lamar Alexander. Did he win?
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch, which ran on NBC and then in syndication from 1989 to 2001. The entire show can be viewed on Tubi.
This week, Mitch gets the bends (snicker)!
Episode 2.17 “The Chamber”
(Dir by Gregory J. Bonann, originally aired on March 2nd, 1992)
Mitch has a lot to think about. Summer is nearly over, and Gayle wants Hobie to return to Ohio for school. Craig, now living in Connecticut, sends Mitch a letter offering to help him get a job as a salesman. It would mean more money, but also a lot of traveling — and no more lifeguarding.
Mitch takes to the ocean in a kayak to clear his head. When he comes across a panicked boy on a boat, he learns that the boy’s father was scuba diving and is trapped 90 feet underwater. Mitch free-dives to free the father. Both men reach the surface, but they’ve both got …. THE BENDS!
The bends may have a silly name, but it’s a real condition, and it can be fatal. Because the father is in worse shape, he goes into the decompression chamber first. Mitch isn’t doing well either, so Baywatch rushes him back to the mainland and puts him in their own chamber. Then everyone waits for Mitch to recover.
And Mitch has flashbacks. Flashback after flashback. That’s right: this is a clip show. This is Baywatch at its cheapest. This is Baywatch showing clips that featured a totally different actor playing Hobie. Eventually, once the show runs out of clips, Mitch has a brief out-of-body experience — and then he wakes up.
This is Baywatch at its silliest, but it’s also David Hasselhoff at his most earnest. Say what you will about the show, Hasselhoff always seemed to take it very seriously. Or at least he did until Baywatch Hawaii. Luckily, that’s several seasons away.
Clip shows always feel like a wasted episode, but they’re also incredibly easy to review. This episode has that going for it.
As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We tweet our way through it.
Tonight, for #ScarySocial, I will be hosting Dario Argento’s The Cat O’Nine Tails!
If you want to join us on Saturday night, just hop onto twitter, start the film at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag! The film is available on Prime! I’ll be there co-hosting and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well. It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy!
Today’s song of the day is the orchestral theme from the 1953 sci-fi classic, War of the Worlds.
Today, the Shattered Lens observes what would have been the birthday of the great William Friedkin. As a director, William Friedkin revolutionized both the horror genre and the crime genre. The car chase from 1971’s The French Connection has been much imitated but rarely equaled.
A few years ago, I attended a showing of The French Connection at the Alamo Drafthouse. As exciting as this chase is, it’s even more amazing when viewed on a big screen.
4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!
Today, we honor director William Friedkin on what would have been his birthday.
4 Shots From 4 William Friedkin Films
The French Connection (1971, dir by William Friedkin, DP: Owen Roizman)
The Exorcist (1973, dir by William Friedkin, DP: Owen Roizman)
Sorcerer (1977, dir by William Friedkin, DP: Dick Bush and John M. Stephens)
To Live And Die In L.A. (1985, dir by William Friedkin, DP: M. Scott Smith)
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing SLEDGE HAMMER!, a cop comedy which ran on ABC from 1986 to 1988. The entire series can be found on Prime!
This week, Sledge meets the Maninotes.
Episode 1.3 “Witless”
(Dir by Jackie Cooper, originally aired on October 3rd, 1986)
Upset that crime has fallen in the city due to the insanity of just one cop, Don Phillip Souza (Al Ruscio) announces that he will pay a million dollars to anyone who can bring him Sledge Hammer in a box. When his accountant (Basil Hoffman) points out that a million dollars is a lot of money, Souza explains that he’s running a weekly special.
Fortunately for Sledge, it turns out that the city’s assassins are even dumber than he is. On his way to work, he has several close calls that he fails to notice. A knife is tossed at him but is blocked by his newspaper (which is extra thick because of the addition of several new Zodiac signs). Two hitmen accidentally shoot each other when he leans forward. Sledge spills his poisoned coffee before he can drink it. It’s not until he arrives at work and ends up juggling a lit stick of dynamite in Captain Trunk’s office that he realizes someone is after him.
Captain Trunk orders Hammer to hide out in the country. Unfortunately, the cop driving him explains that he has 12 kids and needs the money both to pay for their school and for a vasectomy. A struggle ends with Hammer getting tossed out of the car. He lands in a field, where he is discovered by farmer Jacob (Lewis Arquette) and his daughter, Isadora (Ann Ryerson).
Jacob and Isadora may ride in a buggy and eschew modern technology, but they’re not Amish. They’re not Mennonites either. Instead, they are Maninotes. Isadora insists that Hammer stay in their farmhouse until he recovers. Jacob insists that he do chores. Sledge milks a cow. Sledge tosses hay. Sledge tries and fails to build a barn.
As you probably already guessed, “Witless” is a parody of the 1985 film Witness. It’s definitely an affectionate parody. It doesn’t make fun of the movie so much as it imagines what would have happened if Harrison Ford’s sensitive and intelligent detective had been replaced by a trigger-happy lunatic. Sledge may be attracted to Isadora, but in the end his true love remains his gun. And when the assassins (led by the Don’s accountant) arrive at the farm, Jacob and Isadora appear with machine guns. When Hammer points out that Maninotes are supposed to be against violence, Jacob shrugs. “It’s the ’80s,” he says.
Eventually, Sledge gets in a box and has himself delivered to the Don so that he can collect the money. When Officer Doreau tells Sledge that he can’t take the money because it’s evidence, Sledge laughs and says that he won’t be pressing charges. Instead, he takes the money and gives it to Jacob and Isadora. Jacob says that he’s going to repair the barn and then buy a Porsche.
This is a hilarious episode, from the sight gags at the start to Sledge’s efforts to help out around the farm. The humor is cheerfully absurd. (At one point, when the accountant is slowly creeping up on Sledge, one of the other assassins walks up and takes his place so the accountant can take a break.) David Rasche plays Sledge with just the right amount of clueless enthusiasm. I laughed throughout. Sledge Hammer may be witless, but he’s also very funny.
