Late Night Retro Television Review: Sledge Hammer! 1.1 “Under the Gun”

Posted on August 14, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing SLEDGE HAMMER!, a cop comedy which ran on ABC from 1986 to 1988. The entire series can be found on Prime!

My friend Pat McCurry introduced me to Sledge Hammer earlier this year. Starring David Rasche as Detective Sledge Hammer, this show was a parody of Dirty Harry and Hunter. Since I’m currently reviewing Hunter on Thursday night, it seems only appropriate to review Sledge Hammer on Friday night!

Episode 1.1 “Under the Gun

(Dir by Martha Coolidge, originally aired on September 23rd, 1986)

“HAMMER!” shouts police Captain Trunk (Harrison Page), “YOU COULDN’T RESIST BLOWING UP A BUILDING ON YOUR WAY TO WORK THIS MORNING, COULD YOU!?”

Captain Trunk yells a lot but that’s just because he’s been put in charge of managing Detective Sledge Hammer (David Rasche), a San Francisco cop who talks to his gun and who is currently on suspension for shooting a robber at a grocery store before then buying some eggs and “those little cocktail weenies.” When asked by a reporter if his response was too violent, Hammer replied that he really needed his groceries.

For the record, Trunk is correct. Hammer did blow up a building on his way to work. There was a sniper on the roof so Hammer pulled a rocket launcher out of the back of his car and took care of the problem.

Despite all of that, the mayor (John Vernon, who previously played San Francisco’s mayor in Dirty Harry) orders that Sledge Hammer be taken off suspension. The Mayor’s daughter, Francie (Judie Aronson), has disappeared. (“She was either kidnapped or she is just very good at hiding.”) The police think that she was taken by the Allied Violent Offence Network (AVON), a terrorist group led by Weird Willy Luxley (D.W. Brown). Weird Willy is so evil that his own parents gave him up for adoption three years before he was born. The Mayor thinks that Sledge Hammer’s unapologetic embrace of violence is the way to go.

Hammer is assigned a partner, Dori Doreau (Anne-Marie Martin), an expert in negotiation and criminal psychology. At first, Hammer is uneasy about working with a woman. But, when he sees her beat up a man with a shotgun, he’s impressed. “That was excessively violent and totally unnecessary. I loved it.” Doreau mentions she was at the top of her class in hand-to-hand combat. “I’d like to fight you sometimes, Doreau,” Hammer replies.

Hammer promises to bring back “the mayor’s daughter, dead or alive.” Reasoning that it’s usually a member of the family who is to blame in cases like this, Hammer arrests and interrogates the Mayor’s wife. That gets Hammer suspended again but it turns out that Hammer was half-right. It wasn’t the Mayor’s wife. Instead, in true Patty Hearst manner, it turns out that Francie Flambo is a member of AVON and she arranged her own kidnapping!

It all leads to a shootout in a warehouse, as these things often do. When AVON makes their ransom demand, Doreau is sent to deliver the money. (She’s actually given a suitcase full of shredded paper.) Sledge Hammer crashes through a skylight and lands on a box, grinning.

“Why are you smiling!?” Weird Willie Luxley demands.

“I’m trigger happy, that’s why!” Hammer replies.

Soon, all of the members of AVON have been subdued and Francie has been arrested. The Mayor offers Doreau a promotion but Doreau refuses to accept it because she feels that Hammer is not being given the recognition that he deserves.

This seems like the start of a beautiful friendship.

The first episode of Sledge Hammer may be 40 years old but it’s still feels relevant and the laughs still feel earned. As played by David Rasche, Sledge Hammer is the perfect parody of every unapologetically violent action hero. Though there are hints of attraction between him and Doreau, the episode makes it pretty clear that Hammer’s true love is for his gun. At the same time, there’s something rather refreshing about Hammer’s total and complete lack of angst. As I watched this episode, it occurred to me that Hammer would probably get as annoyed with Daniel Craig’s self-pitying version of James Bond as I do.

This pilot was enjoyable and funny 26 minutes of pure entertainment. I look forward to reviewing the rest of the series!

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 4.6 “Lost and Found In Space”

Posted on August 14, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988. The show can be found on Daily Motion.

This week, it’s not just the patients who need to be stitched up.

Episode 4.6 “Lost and Found In Space”

(Dir by Robert Becker, originally aired on November 13th, 1985)

Bobby Caldwell lives!

Things were looking pretty bad for Bobby last week. As you may remember, he picked up a waitress, took her to his Cape Cod home, and then ended up getting slashed across the face when she pulled a razor blade out from under her tongue. This week, Bobby is wandering around the hospital with a huge bandage on his face and telling everyone that he had an “accident.” It’s only to Dr. Turner that he confesses that he was attacked by the waitress. Bobby claims that he responded by punching her and that he then called the police.

Bobby spends this episode in a truly foul mood. Not only does he have a bandage on his face but he’s also been told that the Hospital Review Board doesn’t feel that he’s performing enough surgeries for the residents to really get the training that they need. (“We’re a teaching hospital,” Dr. Craig explains.) Bobby pressures an old man into getting a face lift that he really doesn’t need. Even Victor thinks that the surgery is unethical. I mean, when you’ve lost Victor Ehrlich….

Meanwhile, Dr. Westphall is finally released from the hospital after fainting due to the Malaria that he brought back from working abroad. Westphall is depressed about the whole thing. Westphall is always depressed. Even when his daughter comes home to help out, Westphall is depressed to see her. Cheer up, Westphall!

After weeks of trying to lose weight, Elliot discovers that he’s actually gained three pounds. What’s worse is that his girlfriend, Marcy (Jeannie Elias), lost weight at the same time that Elliot was gaining weight and, when she sees that he’s just as heavy as ever, she dumps him.

Amongst the patients, Pru Dowler (Amanda Wyss) and Buddy Askew (Mark Baker) are two developmentally challenged teenagers who end up “procreating” (as Luther puts it) in Pru’s hospital room. Dr. Craig takes it upon himself to discuss what happened when Pru and it’s just as awkward as you might expect.

Col. Chuck Cochrane (David Ackroyd) is an astronaut who collapses while giving a speech. In the hospital, he has nightmares about being trapped in space. The whole storyline brought to mind The Ninth Configuration, a film that perhaps not coincidentally starred the future Donald Westphall himself, Ed Flanders.

The highlight of this episode was undoubtedly William Daniels’s performance as Dr. Craig. With Dr. Westphall recovering his illness, the day-to-day tasks of running the hospital fell on Dr. Craig and he was not at all happy about it. On this show, William Daniels is always at his best when Dr. Craig is in a bad mood. Before going on rounds, Dr. Craig predicted that Dr. Morrison would show up late and have some overly complicated excuse. Morrison did just that and it was hard not to smile at Craig’s exasperation. At the same time, it is made clear that the main reason that Craig is upset is because his granddaughter has been taken away from him. It was hard not to feel bad for him, even when he was biting everyone’s heads off.

This was not a happy episode. No one in the hospital seems to be doing well. Bobby is bitter. Dr. Craig is angry. Elliott is feeling defeated. And Westphall …. well, he’s just Westphall. Fortunately, the strong cast and the smart writing made up for the fact that St. Eligius isn’t a happy place right now.

Seriously, I could watch William Daniels yell at people all day.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Hunter 1.16 “Guilty”

Posted on August 13, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Hunter, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1991. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, it’s another violent couple of days in Los Angeles.

Episode 1.16 “Guilty”

(Dir by Michael Lange, originally aired on April 13th, 1985)

In 1979, Louis McMahon (Ken Foree) was convicted of murder and given a life sentence. Six years later, he’s been paroled and …. wait, really? He served six years for murder? What the Hell, California!?

Louis is free and working as a cook. When someone starts stalking and killing the jurors at his trial, Louis is the number one suspect. However, before the killer strikes, he always calls his victims and rasps, “Guilty.” Louis’s throat was slashed in prison and he’s now mute! Or is he? McCall suggests that Louis is faking being mute and …. well, yeah. That’s what he was doing alright.

This is the most simplistic episode of Hunter yet. McCall and Hunter figure out quickly that Louis is the murderer. All the other cops refuse to take Hunter and McCall seriously because of …. reasons, I guess? I mean, there really is no other suspect. Louis is the one person who has a reason to what to commit the murders. The only thing linking the victims is that they all voted to convict Louis. And yet, once again, Hunter and McCall find themselves being told not to bother the obvious murderer.

Of course, Hunter ends up shooting Louis. We haven’t finished the first season and I’ve already lost track of the amount of people that Hunter has shot. While I am as concerned as anyone is about trigger-happy cops, I do have to say that everyone that Hunter has shot had it coming. That’s especially true of Louis, who was an absolute monster. Ken Foree did a really good job playing him. Foree was so scary so that it kind of made up for the fact that this was one of the most predictable hours of television that I’ve ever watched.

Once again, Hunter and McCall save countless lives and they get no credit for it. Instead, they get sent to park to arrest muggers. As the episode ends, they actually catch one. I was surprised Hunter didn’t just shoot him.

Retro Television Review: Almost Heaven 1.1 “Pilot”

Posted on August 13, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! This Thursdays, I will be reviewing Almost Heaven, which aired its only episode on ABC in 1978. The show can be found on YouTube!

This week, we take a look at a pilot featuring a few familiar faces.

Episode 1.1 “Almost Heaven”

(Dir by Bill Persky, originally aired on December 28th, 1978)

After getting into an argument with his girlfriend, college student Dave Leland (Robert Hays) accidentally drives his car off of a cliff. One second, Dave is plunging to his death and the next second, he’s stepping into what appears to be a rather nondescript counseling office.

He is met by Lydia (Eva Gabor), who explains that Dave is dead. (“You’ll get used to it.”) Dave wasn’t bad enough to go to Hell but he also wasn’t good enough to win immediate entry into Heaven so for now, he’s been assigned to work at the Heavenly Crisis and Conscience Center. Lydia explains that this is where souls wait until they’ve done enough good deeds to enter Heaven. It’s Almost Heaven.

At this point, I yelled at the screen, “It’s Purgatory! Get it right!”

Dave’s job is to watch Earth on television and to counsel anyone who he sees preparing to make a bad decision. (The people who he counsels will be brought to the office but they’ll forget about it as soon as they leave, though Dave’s hopefully good advice will remain in their minds. Got it?) Dave’s coworkers are snooty Randall (Richard Roat), perky Annie (Laura Heineman), and future talk show host Danny (Jay Leno).

Okay, actually, Danny is not a talk show host. Instead, he’s the character who seems like he’s cynical but who actually has a good heart. In life, he stole cars. In death, he helps Dave learn the ropes and he has an oddly flirtatious vibe with Eva Gabor.

Once Dave gets used to being dead, it’s time for him to talk Bridgett (Ellen Regan) out of killing herself. Does he succeed? Well, it would be a really depressing sitcom if he didn’t.

Almost Heaven was a pilot that was not turned into a full series. It aired once, a few days after Christmas, and that was it. Robert Hays was likable in the lead role and the supporting cast did the best they could. (It’s obvious that he was more of a stand-up than an actor but, to the probable disappointment of Conan fans everywhere, Jay Leno is actually okay in this pilot.) The main problem with the pilot is that the script is so jokey that the moments that try to be serious — like Dave convincing Bridgett not to kill herself — feel out of place and fall flat. This is one of those pilots where you can imagine it actually developing into a good show but only if the writers eventually managed to settle on a consistent tone. As well, they really should have called this show Purgatory. Almost Heaven could mean anywhere.

Almost Heaven only ran for one episode but hopefully, Dave eventually made it into Heaven. As for Robert Hays, he went on to star in Airplane! so everything turned out for the best.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 4.12 “Duty Calls”

Posted on August 12, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

The season continues! Can the Bulls hold on to their undefeated record?

Episode 4.12 “Duty Calls”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on December 21st, 1988)

Considering all of the time that I’ve spent complaining about how there’s usually very little continuity from one 1st & Ten episode to another, I really do have to start this review by giving this show some credit. This episode actually follows up on something that happened a few episodes ago. Harley (Ken Morrison), the kid that Dr. Death befriended in “Injustice for All,” shows up at Bulls Stadium and tells Dr. Death that his mother has abandoned him yet again.

Dr. Death tracks Frankie (Beth Broderick) down at a biker bar and tells her that she needs to go home and take care of her son. It turns out that Frankie hasn’t even told her new boyfriend, Deacon (John Benjamin Martin), that she has a son. When Deacon finds out, he’s offended that Frankie wasn’t honest with him. He explains that bikers are all about family. If Frankie has a son, that means all of the other members of the motorcycle gang have a son as well.

(While it’s easy to scoff at this episode’s mawkish dialogue and its simplistic handling of what looks to be a case of massive parental neglect, I do have to say that my Dad had his share of biker friends and, underneath their admittedly rough exterior, they were some of the nicest people that I have ever met.)

While Dr. Death is fixing a family, Gail (Shanna Reed) and TD Parker (OJ Simpson) are trying to motivate the team to win their 11th game by offering them a $900,000 bonus if they secure a victory. This gets Gail in trouble with the rest of the league’s owners, all of whom are worried that Gail’s bonus is going to harm their bottom line. Gail’s boss, Mr. Medford (Monte Markham), thinks that it’s a great idea.

That said, the Bulls are going to have a tough game. Two Miami gamblers (one of whom is played by a youngish Chazz Palminteri) bribe the temperamental chef at Bubba and Jethro’s bar to give the Bulls food poisoning! On the morning of the game, all of the players are feeling sick and — ugh — flatulent. Will the Bulls still be able to win the game?

Yes, they do.

How do they win the game? I have no idea. Coach Denardo yells at them and then, one jump cut later, we see that the Bulls are ahead on the scoreboard. All of the players are still sick and constantly having to run off the field, but somehow they still crush their opponents. Maybe they were just playing a really bad team….

(For a show about a football team, it’s always interesting how little time 1st & Ten devotes to things like strategy or play calling. We’re told that Coach Denardo is one of the best, but it’s rare that we ever actually see him coaching.)

As nice as it was to see Dr. Death reuniting Harley with his mother, the rest of this episode was pretty much the epitome of everything that bothers me about this show. Who are the two gamblers who poisoned the entire team? The episode keeps things vague, and I imagine that we’ll never hear about either one of them again. The gamblers will vanish, just like the team’s female placekicker vanished after appearing in one episode. There really aren’t any stakes in 1st & Ten because most storylines get abandoned only a few minutes after they start.

Oh well. At least OJ Simpson always killed it in the role of TD Parker. This episode finds OJ — or actually, TD, but we all know TD might as well be named OJ — talking about the beauty of an undefeated season. Maybe that’s why the team won. They knew better than to get on OJ’s bad side.

Next week: The march to the championship game continues!

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 8.6 “Soap Gets in Your Eyes/A Match Made in Heaven/Tugs of the Heart”

Posted on August 12, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

Soon we’ll be making another round….

Episode 8.6 “Soap Gets in Your Eyes/A Match Made in Heaven/Tugs of the Heart”

(Dir by Bruce Bilson, originally aired on October 20th, 1984)

Years ago, Gopher asked Leslie Palmer (Dianne Kay) to marry him. Leslie turned him down, breaking his heart. At the time, she said that Gopher just wasn’t mature enough to marry. He had no direction in his life.

This week, when Leslie boards the Pacific Princess, she sees that Gopher has grown up.… well, at least a little. As Gopher explains it, he has an important job, a nice salary, and a good pension. “People call me sir,” he says, and Fred Grandy delivers the line with just enough sheepishness that one gets the feeling he’s just as surprised as anyone by the fact that he’s finally gotten his life together. When Gopher again asks Leslie to marry him, she says yes.

Oh my God! First Julie got married and now Gopher! Is there going to be anyone left on the ship?!

Well, hold on. Leslie may accept Gopher’s proposal, but later she has a breakdown and apologizes. Leslie says that she loves Gopher but, “I’m not in love with you.” It turns out that Leslie is pregnant and she accepted Gopher’s proposal so her child would not be born out of wedlock. Gopher is surprisingly forgiving.

This was actually a sweet story, largely due to Fred Grandy’s sincere performance as Gopher. At the same time, it was hard not to miss Lauren Tewes while watching this story. The Love Boat always hinted that Julie was destined to end up with either Doc or Gopher. Pat Klous is doing a good job as Julie’s replacement, but she still doesn’t have the same chemistry with the cast that Tewes did. If Julie McCoy seemed like everyone’s sister, Judy seems like everyone’s respected coworker.

While Gopher was getting his heart broken, the recently deceased Jack Davidson (Bill Macy) boarded the ship with his guardian angel, Mr. Weatherby (Fritz Weaver). In order to get into heaven, Jack would have to commit one selfless act while on the boat. Jack met and fell in love with Blair Chapman (Juliet Mills). However, knowing that he was destined to disappear into the afterlife immediately after the cruise ended, Jack gently told Blair that he couldn’t get involved with her. That counted as his selfless act. As for Blair, it turned out that she was terminally ill and had only a month or so to live. Jack leaves the boat happy, knowing that Blair will soon die and be in Heaven with him. Only The Love Boat could present dying as a happy ending.

Finally, soap opera actor David Swick (Charles Frank) plays a villain on daytime television, but he’s a nice guy in real life. Melanie (Susan Blanchard) discovers this firsthand when she meets David on the boat and they fall in love. Unfortunately, Melanie’s mother (Jayne Meadows) cannot forgive David for all the evil things his character has done on television. This story was just silly, but at least Frank and Blanchard had a likable chemistry.

Though the season overall may have gotten off to a rough start, this week’s episode of The Love Boat was actually a pretty pleasant cruise. Fred Grandy got to do something other than just be goofy. Juliet Mills died .… okay, well that wasn’t pleasant, but at least she’ll have someone waiting for her in the afterlife. As for the soap opera storyline, it took me back to those summer days when I was out of school and I watched the daytime dramas with my mom and my aunt. Those were good memories.

I enjoyed this cruise! The Love Boat truly has something for everyone.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.14 “Inferno”

Posted on August 11, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, Bobby goes undercover!

Episode 4.14 “Inferno”

(Dir by Sara Rose, originally aired on January 17th, 1999)

TC is on vacation but, before he leaves, he tasks Cory with discovering who is selling heroin at a trendy nightclub. To be honest, that sounds like a job for the Narcotics Squad but whatever. Cory tasks Bobby and Monica with going undercover. Monica starts to hang out at the club. Bobby gets a job as a bouncer. It’s amazing how the same two cops can somehow both patrol the same small stretch of land and also continually work undercover without anyone ever recognizing them. Their presence at the club still doesn’t prevent a rock star from overdosing or an actor from later shooting himself in front of Monica.

Meanwhile, Cory and Amy ride their stupid bikes around Santa Monica and harass drug addicts. Amy catches one addict and says that he hasn’t been looking too good lately. Amy has only been a member of the bike patrol for a few months so why is she acting like she’s been on this show for years? As silly as the undercover work is, Pacific Blue is still at its most ludicrous when it tries to make the bike cops look like a bunch of badasses,

Bobby’s ex-girlfriend, Rita (Heather Marie Marsden), turns up singing at the club. Despite Monica warning that Bobby is making a mistake, he allows himself to fall for Rita again despite the fact that Rita is now dating club owner Gary Fein (Scott Paetty), the man who is suspected of being Santa Monica’s biggest heroin dealer. Of course, it turns out that Rita is the drug dealer. Eventually, Bobby has to kill his ex-girlfriend to keep her from shooting his fellow bike cops. Bobby is almost as upset about that as Slater was over losing his salamander.

The episode ends with a Cory/Bobby conversation. Cory asks if Bobby was in love with Rita and Bobby admits that he had feelings for her. The scene suggests that Cory and Bobby are secretly a couple. If I was Cory, I would be hesitant about dating someone who killed his last girlfriend.

TC returns and tells Cory that she did a good job running the department. Cory thanks him and then looks sad as the episode ends. If she really felt that way about Bobby, why did she send him undercover in the first place? Why not send in Granger? Actually, is Granger still a character on this show? I haven’t seen him in a while.

This is a dumb show. You already knew that. This episode served as a reminder that, along with being dumb, no one on this show is particularly good at their job. Bobby goes undercover and allows his emotions to get the better of him …. again! Monica goes undercover and actually does a good job but Cory won’t acknowledge it because she hates Monica …. still! Amy rides around on her bicycle and harasses people like a corrupt deputy in a drive-in movie. The fact that everyone is on bicycles just makes everything all the more ridiculous.

Santa Monica, you deserve better!

Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell: The New Class 2.13 “Bayside Story”

Posted on August 11, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00. The show is currently on Prime.

Oh no, it’s another Bayside vs Valley episode!

Episode 2.13 “Bayside Story”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on October 22nd, 1994)

It’s time for Bayside and Valley to meet on the athletic field …. again!

*sigh*

Seriously, how much water can this show draw from the well of this particular rivalry? Ever since the original Saved By The Bell, there have been episodes about Bayside competing against Valley. Every episode begins with Mr. Belding complaining that Bayside never beats Valley. And yet, every episode also seems to end with Bayside defeating Valley so I’m really not sure what Belding’s problem is.

This episode, after Valley toilet papers the Bayside hallways, Mr. Belding complains that Bayside hasn’t defeated Valley since Slater graduated. Tommy D, Lindsay, Rachel, Megan, Brian, and Bobby all nod in agreement, which is odd since Slater graduated before any of them started at Bayside. Belding also mentions that Screech is in Vegas for Zack and Kelly’s wedding and, again, everyone nods as if they know who Zack and Kelly are. None of these students knew who Screech was when he first came back so how would they know Zack and Kelly? Am I just giving this too much thought? Perhaps.

As the head cheerleader, Megan is determined that the cheerleading squad (which is apparently made up of only her, Rachel, and Lindsay) is ready to declare death to Valley. But then she meets Doug (Bumper Robinson), the captain of Valley’s football team, and she ends up falling for him. Her friends are horrified that Megan would date someone from Valley but that doesn’t stop them from using Megan’s relationship to take advantage of Doug by pulling off one of those elaborate SBTB schemes where everyone dresses up in a stupid costume and distracts Doug long enough for Brian and Bobby to use a spy camera to take pictures of Valley’s playbook.

(Seriously, the whole thing is really stupid.)

Shortly afterwards, Megan ends up breaking up with Doug because she can’t handle everyone’s disapproval. The Gang feels guilty so they decide to give the pictures of the playbook back to Doug but, as opposed to just giving him the film, they instead decide to pull off another elaborate prank that involves everyone putting on costumes.

The reason why I’m not going into a lot of details about the pranks and the costumes is that it’s all really stupid. And I’m worried that if I spend too much time describing all of this, my brain might short-circuit. Let’s just say that it never occurs to anyone to just do the simplest of things, like maybe practicing really hard on the football field and trying to win the game legitimately.

That said, there a few things that work in this episode.

Amazingly, there actually is a funny running joke in this episode. Unlike most of the characters on this show, Brian knows nothing about American sports and continually has to be told the most basic facts about football. (“It’s played on a field, not a rink!”) Christian Oliver delivered his lines with the right amount of enthusiastic naivete and it was kind of nice to see Brian transformed into something more than just a stand-in for Zack.

The episode ends with the Bayside Gang meeting the Valley Gang at the Maxx and everyone crying as they realize that they’re not so different after all. That was actually kind of sweet. And then Belding ran in wearing riot gear because he was convinced a fight was about to break out. That actually made me laugh a little. So, dumb pranks aside, this episode wasn’t a total loss.

In conclusion, I should mention that my high school had a hated rival that was actually only a few blocks away from us. Our football team hated their football team and all that other stuff. Unfortunately, since my school was pretty much an art school, I don’t think we ever won a game against them. Some of that was because my school didn’t even have a football field so our team had to go over to the rival school whenever they wanted to practice.

Seriously, not even Slater could have saved them.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 6.3 “Spaceman”

Posted on August 10, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, CHiPs jumps the proverbial shark.

Episode 6.3 “The Spaceman Made Me Do It”

(Dir by Winrich Kolbe, originally aired on October 24th, 1983)

There’s three storylines in this week’s episode. Let’s start with the two that make sense.

In the episodes comedic storyline, the members of the Highway Patrol all receive a chain letter. Some continue the chain and have good luck. Others — like Ponch — do not continue the chain and wait for their bad luck. Grossie mails his letter and then gets an $800 refund from the IRS. However, at the end of the episode, it’s revealed that the Highway Patrol’s secretary failed to mail the chain letters and the IRS informs Grossie that his refund was a mistake. Everyone laughs at Grossie. Poor guy.

The B-plot features Grossie and new officer Kathy (Tina Gayle) tracking down some thieves who are robbing Japanese tourists. This was a traditional CHiPs story and it was actually kind of nice of the show to acknowledge that Ponch isn’t the only person fighting crime in California.

But then there’s the main plot. Ponch and Bobby have been assigned to night patrol. They catch a preadolescent girl named Jodi (Kyle Richards) breaking into a jewelry store. She says that an E.T. (and yes, she says “E.T.’) ordered her to break into the store because it need the diamonds to fix its spaceship. Ponch and Bobby take Jodi to the station and Ponch volunteers to serve as Jodi’s legal guardian until her parents can be found. Dr. Joyce Brothers appears as herself, talking to Jodi and announcing the Jodi is not crazy.

Having watched five seasons of CHiPs, I found myself waiting for the inevitable moment in which it would be revealed that Jodi was being manipulated by a master criminal. When Jodi ran away to meet up with the UFO, I expected that Ponch and Bobby would track her down and arrest the actual villain.

Instead, when Ponch and Bobby tracked down Jodi, I got a scene of a light shining down from the sky, Jodi being pulled towards the unseen UFO, and Ponch grabbing her and yelling that the aliens can’t have her. Ponch’s words apparently have the right effect because the lights disappear as the never-seen UFO returns to its own planet.

“What was that?” Bobby asks.

“Whatever you want it to be,” Ponch replies.

No, guys. I’m sorry. This is CHiPs. It’s a show about cops on motorcycles. It’s not a show about UFOs. You can’t just introduce an alien on this show and then have everyone shrug it off once they hear that Grossie won’t be getting his tax refund. This just isn’t the show to try that sort of thing. (Yes, Force Seven did get pretty weird but that was a backdoor pilot for a different series and Ponch and Jon didn’t actually get involved in any of the mad scientist/karate action.)

I’m going to guess this episode was an attempt to shake things up. Maybe there was a feeling that, since new star Tom Reilly lacked all credibility as a cop, the show should abandon the straight-forward approach that it used during the Larry Wilcox years. I’m sure the show had its reasons but this episode just doesn’t feel right.

Of course, some thing never change. The aliens may have been a surprise but it’s not a surprise that Ponch was the one who (somehow) made them go away. Aliens or not, this is still….

Retro Television Review: Crime Story 1.14 “Fatal Crossroads”

Posted on August 10, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Crime Story, which ran on NBC from 1986 to 1988. The entire show can be found on Tubi!

This week, guess who screws up?

Episode 1.14 “Fatal Crossroads”

(Dir by Gary Sinise, originally aired on January 9th, 1987)

As much as I want to like David Abrams — and I did like him for the first few episodes — he’s just dumb. Offended by the fact that Luca is using his legal advice to try to beat his indictment, David starts this episode out by approaching Luca in public and announcing that he’s not only quit the public defenders office but that he’s also decided to join the D.A.’s office, specifically so he can take guys like Luca down. Then, later on in the episode, David approaches Luca again and, this time, he brings along his father (Nathan Davis). David’s father, a former low-level gangster, brags about how smart David is and how he’s going to take Luca down.

So, of course, Luca has someone put a bomb underneath David’s car.

And, of course, it’s David’s father who decides to borrow the car to go to the store and who ends up getting blown up.

And yes, it’s a terrible thing that David’s father got blown up. BUT WHAT DID DAVID THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN!? He knows who Luca is! He knows that Luca will kill people without a second thought. So why the Hell is David walking up to Luca and basically daring him to try to kill him? I mean, David’s father was in the rackets! David should have known better and, for that matter, David’s father should have known better.

I’m sorry but David Abrams is a moron.

For some reason, Luca also tries to take a hit out on Torello, despite the fact that Luca’s entire legal strategy depends on Torello denying Homan’s claims that Torello is crooked. Fortunately, Torello is somehow brilliant enough to realize that Luca is going to take a hit out on him and the members of the Crime Squad are smart enough to take a look at a building and somehow figure out exactly which room a sniper would be hiding in. If only David Abrams was as smart!

This episode featured a few too many coincidences and a bit too much of David Abrams suddenly acting like an idiot. It was directed by Gary Sinise, who is one of my favorite people. Sinise does a good job of capturing the drizzly gangster movie atmosphere but the script could have used a bit more work.