Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 5.2 “The Naked Truth”

Posted on October 20, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, everyone’s going undercover!

Episode 5.2 “The Naked Truth”

(Dir by Sara Rose, originally aired on July 25th, 1999)

When a wealthy sorority girl is found dead on the beach with her head caved in, it falls to the bicycle patrol to solve the case. Where are the Homicide detectives? We know that the Santa Monica PD has a homicide division because Chris keeps talking about transferring there. I know I bring this up every episode but it simply doesn’t make sense for the bike cops to be the ones investigating all of these crimes. I mean, essentially, they’re traffic cops. In the real world, they’re job would be to secure the crime scene and wait for the real detectives to show up.

Anyway, when Monica sees that the dead girl was wearing a sequined bikini, she immediately deduces that she was working as a stripper. (I’m not sure that logic would hold hope in court but whatever.) Why would a rich sorority girl be working at a strip club? Monica and Chris go undercover to find out. Chris is the new housemother at the sorority house. Monica is a new pledge. It turns out that working at the strip club started as a hazing ritual but now, all of the girls are being blackmailed (via email, we’re specifically told) into doing it.

Who is the blackmailer? That mystery is solved when Chris catches the local handyman going through her underwear. The handyman explains that he’s not a murderer, he’s just a pervert. He also says that all of the girls have expensive underwear except for one who owns “K-mart panties.” Because that girl is poor and a computer science major, Monica and Chris decide that she’s the blackmailer. (Again, I’m not sure that logic would hope up in court but whatever. I’m too tired to argue with this stupid show.) I guess the lesson here is to spend money on quality panties. Well, don’t worry, Pacific Blue! I buy and wear only the best!

As for the murderer, it turns out to be a cowboy with a country accent who is always hanging out at the strip club and requesting a private dance. It really wasn’t that much of a shock.

Pacific Blue always talks a big game about how women shouldn’t be objectified but then every episode opens with random bikini shots and this episode looked for every possible excuse to put Monica in a school girl outfit. I’d have more respect for Pacific Blue if it was just honest about what it is was doing as opposed to having the characters constantly spouting a lot of cliches about empowerment that the show itself doesn’t seem to take all that seriously.

The good thing about this episode is that it ends with Chris telling TC that they need some time apart. I agree! You can do better, Chris!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 5.1 “Reckoning”

Posted on October 13, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, we start the fifth and final season of Pacific Blue.

Episode 5.1 “Reckoning”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on July 18th, 1999)

The fifth season begins with an episode that, even by the standards of Pacific Blue, is problematic and dumb. Where to begin?

This episode picks up from where the fourth season ended. John Patrone is dead. Bruce Best (Kevin McClatchy), the father of a teenage girl who killed herself after being raped by Patrone, has been arrested for the crime. Bobby has been arrested for tossing the rifle that Patrone used in the harbor. Because Bobby discussed his plans with Granger, Jamie, and Monica, they’ve all been suspended from the force pending the results of an Internal Affairs investigation.

When Assistant District Attorney Tucker (Michelle Clunie) meets with Bobby and TC, Bobby does the usual smug act that all of the members of the bike patrol do whenever they’re in trouble. Bobby starts making demands for a deal that will protect the other three rookies. Tucker proceeds to charge Bobby with being an accessory to first degree murder. Ha! Take that, Bobby.

TC files a formal complaint against Susan Jessop of Internal Affairs, accusing her of sexual harassment and bias. Jessop is taken off the case but Jessop’s boss, Captain Sharp (Gretchen German), turns out to be just as strange as Jessop. (If I had to guess, I’d say that Holly Gaginer had some sort of scheduling conflict that kept her from returning as Jessop and the writers just crossed out Jessop’s name in the script and substitued Sharp’s.) TC is suspended from his command. Cory is named the new temporary commander of Pacific Blue. Cory is also the union rep for the three rookies who are being investigated. How can she both be in management and the union at the same time?

Chris gets mad at TC for getting suspended. She wants to transfer to Homicide and now, being married to him could be a career liability. They have a big argument on the pier. Cory, who really should be too busy running the department to get involved in any of this, sits on her bicycle on watches.

When it’s time for Bruce and Bobby to be taken to the courthouse for their arraignment, a man fires a shot at Bruce. Bruce falls to the ground. Oh wait, that’s not Bruce. That’s TC disguised at Bruce! And luckily, he was wearing a bulletproof vest! Patrone’s lawyer, Steve Plana (Eddie Garcia), is arrested for setting up the assassination attempt.

In the courtroom, veteran television producer Steven J. Cannell shows up as the no-nonsense judge. Tucker starts to call witnesses. Things aren’t looking good for Bobby and Bruce. Suddenly, Father Crane (John Kirby) stands up in the back of the court and announces that Bobby and Bruce are innocent. Father Crane first explains that he was the one who threw the rifle into the harbor. He says he did it after Bobby came to him for advice. Father Crane then goes on to say that he was the one who shot Patrone because that was the only way to stop Patrone’s reign of terror. Bobby and Bruce have been covering for him!

Bobby and Bruce are released and exonerated. Father Crane is convicted. TC later visits Crane in jail and says that he knows Crane is lying about both killing Patrone and tossing the rifle in the harbor. TC mentions that Crane is going to be transferred to a state prison where Patrone “had a lot of friends.” What TC, who has been reinstated as commander of Pacific Blue, does not do is apparently tell anyone that Crane is obviously not guilty. For his part, Crane says that it will be a chance for him to minister to those who really need it. You know, Father Crane, you could have just applied to be a prison chaplain. You didn’t have to confess to a murder you didn’t commit.

Bobby takes the recovered rifle and gives it back to Bruce. Bobby admits that Crane lied about tossing the gun. Bruce admits that he killed Patrone. Bobby says that he still feels like Bruce did the right thing. Bruce thanks Bobby for looking out for him. Hey, guys, there’s an innocent man — A PRIEST! — going to prison for you idiots! Is that somehow not an issue?

Chris tells TC that she knows Father Crane lied about being the murderer. She also says that she doesn’t feel like TC deserves his command. He let Bobby get away with destruction of evidence. He’s letting Bruce get away with murder. Finally, someone’s speaking some sense! Not that it matters. The episode ends with the conversation. Knowing Pacific Blue, I doubt any of this will ever be brought up again.

This episode really annoyed me. Father Crane is going to prison but I guess we’re not supposed to care because at least Bobby is off the hook. Does anyone on Pacific Blue ever take responsibility for their mistakes? This is the fourth episode to feature Jamie complaining about Internal Affairs harassing her because she lied on her application to become a police officer. Gee, Jamie — MAYBE YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE LIED IN THE FIRST PLACE! And now Bobby has basically decided that some murders are okay. Where does it end with these people?

At least this is the last season.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.22 “The Right Thing”

Posted on October 6, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the fourth season comes to a close.

Episode 4.22 “The Right Thing”

(Dir by John B. Moranville, originally aired on April 25th, 1999)

Businessman John Patrone (Fred Saldone) has negotiated a peace treaty between two gangs, one black and one Latino. Finally, there will be peace in Santa Monica! However, at a rally to celebrate the treaty, a sniper shoots Patrone dead. At first, I was amazed that the police didn’t have anyone on those rooftops to prevent something like this from happening. Then I realized that security for the rally was being provided solely by Pacific Blue. Of course, the bicycle cops would screw this up.

Despite the fact that John Patrone was a major figure in Santa Monica, we never see any Homicide detectives working the case. Instead, it somehow falls to the bicycle cops to investigate. What they discover is that, despite his altruistic image, Patrone was actually a monster who sold weapons and drugs to the gangs and who raped and impregnated the daughter of Bruce Best (Kevin McClatchey). Bruce’s daughter killed herself and that’s why Bruce assassinated Patrone.

Bruce doesn’t make any effort to disguise the fact that he killed Patrone. He admits it to Bobby, Granger, Jamie, and Monica. However, the four rookie cops are convinced that Patrone deserved to die and that Bruce did “the right thing” by shooting him. In a move that is totally out-of-character for him, Bobby decides to throw all of the evidence implicating Bruce into harbor. Unfortunately, Bobby is being watched by Susan Jessup (Holly Gagnier) of Internal Affairs. Susan goes to TC and offers to let Bobby off the hook in exchange for sex. (As ludicrous a character as Susan may be, Holly Gagnier’s wonderfully unhinged performance was the highlight of the episode.) TC replies that he will arrest Bobby and Bruce personally. This episode ends with a cliffhanger as all four of our rookies pose for their mugshots.

Meanwhile, Chris and Cory deal with a teenager who wants to shoot himself out of a cannon. It’s a bit odd that the bike patrol’s two most experienced cops aren’t working the Patrone murder but whatever. I’ve given up on trying to follow Pacific Blue logic.

We’ll find out the fates of Bobby, Jamie, Granger, and Monica next week, when we start the final season of Pacific Blue. I really can’t wait for all this to be over with!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.20 “Trust”

Posted on September 22, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Cory makes another stupid mistake.

Episode 4.20 “Trust”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on April 11th, 1999)

When her best friend is murdered, Cory assumes that the killer is her friend’s ex-boyfriend, Mark (Joel Gretsch). FBI profiler Jerry Beck (Eric Scott Woods) agrees. In fact, he claims that Mark is a serial killer who has been stalking and killing blondes across the country. Cory, who blames herself for her friend’s death and who has recently broken up with Bobby Cruz, works with Jerry to try to stop Mark’s reign of terror. But what if Jerry Beck isn’t who he says he is? What if the real Jerry Beck was murdered and an imposter took on his identity?

This is one of those episodes where Monica pretty much figures out what’s going on but everyone ignores her because both the characters and the show itself seem to have a bizarre hated for her. Every episode in which Monica appears seems to feature Monica doing better detective work than everyone else on the bike patrol and getting absolutely no credit for it. In this case, Cory does eventually admit that Monica was right so I guess that’s progress.

Oh, this was a stupid episode. Having an FBI profiler turn out to actually be a serial killer isn’t a bad idea but having the killer somehow steal the identity of an actual FBI agent without anyone noticing is one of those things that just asks for too much of a suspension of disbelief. Having Cory then fall for the fake FBI agent while she’s supposed to searching for the killer of her best friend was just another example of Cory basically acting like an idiot. That’s been a frequent thing with Cory this season. It’s odd because Cory used to actually be the smart member of the bike patrol.

While Cory is trying to avenge her friend’s death, Granger hooks up with a woman that he meets online. Jamie is skeptical that CyberVixen is going to be the next Mrs. Granger. It’s always funny to me to see television shows that attempted to deal with the Internet in the 90s. You can always tell that they were written by aging boomers who weren’t quite sure what the Internet was and probably expected it to just be a brief fad.

To me, the funniest moment in this episode was the members of Pacific Blue realizing that Cory was alone with a serial killer so, instead of calling a squad car, they all just hopped on their bicycles and rode over to Cory’s apartment. I mean, would it kill them to take a car for once? I imagine they would have gotten over to the apartment quicker.

This episode was pretty dumb.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.19 “Near Death”

Posted on September 15, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week’s episode is stupid even for Pacific Blue.

Episode 4.19 “Near Death”

(Dir by Gary Winter, originally aired on April 4th, 1999)

Before I say anything else about this episode, allow me to say this: Ugh.

Okay, so check this out. A group of home invaders, led by Claire (Monica Louwerens) and her husband Milo (Matt Borlenghi), are in a van, fleeing from their latest robbery. TC, Chris, Cory, and Bobby are all chasing after them on their bikes. The van takes a sharp turn, the passenger-side door flies open, and Claire falls out. TC swerves to avoid Claire and is thrown straight into an electrical junction box. TC gets electrocuted.

Cory, Chris, and Bobby all arrive and immediately run over to TC. TC isn’t breathing. There’s no heartbeat. Cory and Bobby perform CPR. TC, meanwhile, is having a near-death experience, which means that we get a montage of old clips. They manage to bring TC back to life, but no one bothers to check on Claire. Claire ends up in a coma and subsequently dies at the hospital. Milo blames the cops for ignoring his wife while all of them gathered around TC.

…and Milo is absolutely right. Don’t get me wrong. It makes sense that Cory, Bobby, and especially Chris would be worried about TC. But it doesn’t change the fact that they basically just left another gravely injured person on the street while they gathered around TC. This is not the first time that something like this happened on Pacific Blue, and it’s yet another example of our heroes being rather selfish people.

Later, Cory announces to all the other bicycle cops that their first priority is to track down Milo and his gang because “this one is personal.” In other words, don’t worry about any of the other crimes that might be happening in Santa Monica because those crimes don’t directly involve any of the show’s stars. As is often the case with this show, it’s never really explained why the case apparently only belongs to the bicycle patrol. We don’t see any burglary detectives investigating the home invasions or anything like that. I guess the bike patrol has jurisdiction over everything.

As for TC, he reacts to his near-death experience by becoming more philosophical. He’s determined to always tell the truth. Over the course of the episode, he insults all four of the rookies: Granger, Cruz, Jamie, and Monica. Later, once TC starts to return to normal, he apologizes to Granger, Cruz, and Jamie but smirks when Monica asks if TC has anything he wants to say to her. “Nope,” he says. It’s kind of weird how this show wants its audience to hate Monica despite the fact that Monica is usually the only one of the cops who can be depended upon to do her job.

This episode really annoyed me. There was just something really annoying about a show about bicycle cops attempting to impart some sort of philosophical message about life. Did no one consider that TC is nowhere near a deep enough character to be believable as someone who worries about the larger questions of existence? Did no one consider that Jim Davidson’s limited range made him exactly the wrong actor for this type of story? In the past, TC was always dull but reliable. In this episode, he’s condescending. Since Chris and Cory were already condescending and have been for several seasons, TC joining them pushed this episode to new heights of unearned smugness.

This was an annoying episode. At least no one went undercover.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.13 “Saving Serenity”

Posted on August 4, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Del Toro returns!

Episode 4.13 “Saving Serenity”

(Dir by Michael Levine, originally aired on January 10th, 1999)

When last we saw former series regular Victor Del Toro (played by Marcos A. Ferraez), he was quitting the force after nearly being indicted for killing the man who killed his fiancée. In this episode, Victor finally returns to Santa Monica.

Victor has spent the last five months wandering. He now has bleached blonde hair and a serious drinking problem. When a robber attempts to hold up the bar where Victor is getting drunk, Victor struggles with him. The thief ends up getting shot. Victor grabs the thief’s gun and runs from the bar.

Victor is on the verge of shooting himself on the pier when he sees a woman named Carmen Rios (Angela Alvarado). Carmen reveals that she’s searching for her daughter, Serenity. Serenity was taken away by her biological father. Carmen wants to find her daughter and escape to Mexico with her. Victor agrees to help.

Victor shows up at the Pacific Blue headquarters and announces that he wants to rejoin the force. But, in reality, he just wants to steal the files concerning Serenity’s whereabouts. Later, Victor fakes a bomb threat at the main police station so that he can steal another casefile. TC, Chris, and Cory all reuses to believe that Victor could be involved in anything illegal. Bobby Cruz is convinced that Victor is the one who shot the robber at the bar.

And really, Bobby has reason to be concerned about Victor’s desire to return to Pacific Blue. Victor is a young, handsome Latino who overcame a rough childhood to become a respected bike cop and he’s extremely protective of his younger sister. Bobby, who was introduced after Victor left the show, is also a young, handsome Latino who overcame a rough childhood to become a respected bike cop and he’s also extremely protective of his younger sister. Because the show’s writers were too lazy to actually come up with a new character, Bobby basically is Victor. If Victor returns, the show won’t need Bobby around anymore.

Fortunately, for Bobby, Victor is dead by the end of this episode. He reunites Carmen and Serenity and then drags Serenity’s father out to the pier. Holding a gun to the father’s head, Victor forces the man to repeat the serenity prayer. Cory, TC, and Chris all have their guns drawn. “No!” they all shout in slow motion before opening fire. Victor plunges off the pier and hits the sand below.

OH MY GOD, THEY KILLED VICTOR!

Well, it depends on how you look at it. It turns out that none of them could actually bring themselves to shoot Victor. They just shot up in the air. And then Victor …. well, who knows? The show implies that Victor jumped but, from what I saw, it looks like he was startled and fell backwards. In other words, his friends may not have shot Victor but he might still be alive if they hadn’t fired.

Victor does indeed die at the end of this episode. Wow, Pacific Blue got dark! And I do have to admit that this is actually the best episode of Pacific Blue that I’ve watched so far. Admittedly, it’s a low bar to clear but the whole episode was just so melodramatic and over-the-top that it actually managed to hold my attention in a way that this show usually doesn’t. Those three slow motion shots of people shouting, “Noooooo!” in a row really were worth the price of admission.

So, Victor’s dead. But at least Bobby’s place on the team is secure.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.9 “Cutting Edge”

Posted on July 7, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, TC goes surfing!

Episode 4.9 “Cutting Edge”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on October 18th, 1998)

When an up-and-coming surfer named Kenny Slaughter (Reed Ferichs) is pressured by a corrupt surf board salesman named Rip Cutter (Matt Battaglia), TC befriends Kenny. He and Kenny go surfing. They discuss the philosophy of catching a great wave. “Are you sure you’re a cop?” Kenny asks.

Uhmm, Kenny …. are you kidding? TC is the most uptight guy on the beach. Everything about him screams “cop.”

This episode is an example of something that happened quite frequently with Pacific Blue. One of the bike cops would befriend someone and the viewer would be left to wonder how that could have possibly happened. Friendship usually requires a modicum of likability and that’s something that no one on this show seems to have. Whether it’s Chris saying, “Just doing my job,” after nearly running someone down with her bicycle or Cory rolling her eyes every time that she has to deal with anyone younger than her, there are literally no likable bike cops. Even this episode features Cory complaining about the attitude that Kenny gave her when she arrested him while he and Rip were having a fight on the beach. It’s hard not to notice that almost every episode features Cory complaining about someone’s attitude. It’s a bit of a cliche but it’s true. If everyone you meet is a jerk, that means that you’re the jerk.

TC assigns Monica to work undercover in Rip’s surf shop. This means that Monica has to frequently come over to TC’s apartment to give him updates. Because TC can’t tell anyone that Monica is working undercover, Chris gets suspicious about why Monica is always coming over. Chris and Cory being paranoid about Monica has been going on for nine episodes now and I think that, narratively, it might be a good idea to just move on from it. It wasn’t that interesting to begin with and, at this point, Chris and Cory are just coming across as being overage mean girls.

Anyway, this episode actually felt like an abandoned Baywatch storyline. TC’s no surfer.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.8 “Heat In The Hole”

Posted on June 23, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Chris is finally sent to prison.

Episode 4.8 “Heat In The Hole”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on October 11th, 1998)

This is the dumbest episode of Pacific Blue yet and that’s really saying something.

The incarcerated are being murdered at the local women’s prison so, of course, a bicycle cop is sent in undercover. Actually, two bicycle cops are sent in. The homicide squad wants Chris to go in and pretend to be a prisoner. TC gets jealous of the hunky homicide detective who is in charge of the case so he assigns Bobby to go undercover as a prison guard and keep an eye on Chris.

This is one of those women’s prisons where everyone is young and attractive (no meth addicts here!) and apparently the official uniform is a tank top. It doesn’t take long for Chris to establish herself as being tough and willing to fight. Every prisoner comes to respect her, which is important because, when a riot breaks out, Chris reveals she’s a cop and that she needs the help of the prisoners.

And the prisoners are cool with that.

Seriously.

“Ignore the cop part,” someone says, “Think of how she’s treated us!”

That’s the power of being a bicycle cop. You can show up in a prison, beat people up for two days, betray everyone’s confidence, and the prisoners will still forgive you for …. reasons, I guess.

Needless to say, if you’re an undercover cop in prison, do not reveal the truth in the middle of a prison riot. That might work on Pacific Blue but it’s probably the dumbest thing you can do in real life.

While TC is sitting around at home worried, Monica sees this as her chance to make a move on him. Considering that TC and Chris haven’t stopped arguing since they impulsively got married in Vegas, maybe Monica isn’t really the problem here. I know that we’re supposed to be rooting for TC and Chris but neither one of them is particularly likable. I would not want to go out on a couples date with them.

At the end of this episode, two corrupt prison guards are arrested. Chris leaves the prison. TC pretends to be happy about it.

This was a dumb episode.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.7 “Damaged Goods”

Posted on June 16, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the bike cops are it again.

Episode 4.7 “Damaged Goods”

(Dir by Michael Levine, originally aired on October 4th, 1998)

Bobby has a new girlfriend named Annie (Tracy Hutson). Bobby says that he’s in love with her. Meanwhile, Granger is in lust with Annie’s best friend, Jo (Shannon Elizabeth, in an early role). After Granger sleeps with Jo, Jo tells him that he owes her $200. It turns out that both Jo and Annie get paid to have sex. Meanwhile, Annie’s roommate is found dead below a 6-story window.

Chris is convinced that Annie’s roommate was murdered. TC and Cory disagree. TC is especially angry because he thinks Chris is spending too much time hanging out with her friends in Homicide. Oddly enough, none of those friends show up in this episode. As well. no one from the Vice Squad shows up to investigate the campus prostitution ring. Instead, this is yet another episode where it somehow all falls to the bicycle cops.

Monica goes undercover and joins Jo and Annie’s therapy group, where Dr. Alicia Alper (Joyce Hyser) teaches that prostitution is empowering. Soon, Jo recruits Monica to work as a an escort. Or, at least, I think it was Jo. This episode is edited in such a haphazard way that it was hard to keep track of what was actually going on.

This episode finds Cory worrying about how she’s going to survive as a single mom. Her ex-boyfriend, Doug (Owen McKibben), returns and says that he wants to be in the baby’s life. Cory says that it’s been over a month since Doug reacted to the news of her pregnancy by walking out on her. Doug threatens to sue for the right to be a part of the baby’s life. Cory has a miscarriage. She says it was due to the stress Doug put her under. Doug says that it was due to Cory still working a very physically demanding and rough job despite being pregnant. I felt so bad for Cory in this episode, especially since the only person (other than Doug) who bothered to visit her in the hospital was Chris, who is pretty much incapable of feeling or showing emotion.

Anyway, it turns out that Annie’s roommate was murdered by a client and then the client was murdered by Dr. Alper. However, when the bike cops arrest her, several other woman all walk up and declares that Dr. Alper is innocent because they killed the client. However, Dr. Alper confesses. Bobby breaks up with his girlfriend. That’s probably for the best. Everyone knows Bobby should be with Monica.

This episode …. oh God. I mean, it tried to liven things up a little. There were a lot of intense interrogation scenes and a lot of jump cuts that were apparently meant to create tension. We would watch Chris ask a question and then jump to someone in a totally different room answering an unrelated question. It was very showy but it wasn’t very effective. These folks aren’t hard-boiled detectives. They’re bicycle cops.

Seriously, where were the real detectives?

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.5 “Overkill”

Posted on May 26, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s time for another stupid trip to L.A.

Episode 4.5 “Overkill”

(Dir by Sara Rose, originally aired on August 23rd, 1998)

Jamie is learning martial arts from Master Soo Han (Yoshi Jenkins). When she is saved from a group of muggers by a fellow classmate named Kyle (Matty Liu), she starts to fall in love with him. Soon, he is teaching her how to be a better fighter. For some reason, Jamie doesn’t tell Kyle that she’s a cop. That makes things awkward when Kyle realizes that 1) the man who killed his mother is a student in the class and 2) Kyle is being groomed to be a government assassin.

I’ve always said that you can tell when a show has cast a professional athlete in a guest role because the athlete is always the worst actor in the episode. That was certainly the case here. At first, I was sure that Matty Liu was a professional martial artist. It turns out that he’s actually a pro surfer but still, my point stands. It doesn’t matter how many camera tricks or jump cuts the show uses to make Liu look like a badass, he’s still an amazingly stiff actor. The scenes of him and Jamie falling in love don’t work because he’s not capable of showing any emotion, let alone love.

Speaking of love, Chris is still mad that her husband didn’t select her to be promoted to sergeant. When she discovers a murder victim, she impresses Homicide Detective Thomas (Carl T. Evans) by figuring out that the victim died from a — wait for it — broken neck. WOW! Amazing deduction, Chris! I mean, how difficult is it to spot a broken neck? Even though Chris is neither a medical examiner nor a detective, Thomas invites her to fill in for a sick Homicide detective. Chris accepts.

TC’s not happy about that! Actually, TC’s never happy. He’s been in charge of Pacific Blue for five episodes now and he hasn’t smiled once. He has spent a lot of time glaring. In fact, both he and Cory spend most of their time glaring at other people now. I guess that’s what you do when you’re in charge, management by glaring.

Finally, Bobby and Spazz compete over — wait a minute, I got a name wrong there. What is Spazz’s real name? Is it Granger? Yeah, okay, sorry about that. Bobby and Granger serve as body guards for a French actress (Lydie Denier), who claims that she’s being stalked. Bobby has seen all of her films but she’s more attracted to Spazz, for some reason. Sorry, Bobby! I would have picked you.

Anyway, this was one of Pacific Blue’s dumbest episodes yet. Chris is even more whiny than usual. TC and Cory are useless. Jamie and Kyle’s fight scenes are edited in such a way that one gets dizzy trying to follow them. This episode featured bad acting and worst direction, No wonder Chris wants to transfer to Homicide.