Hit or Miss America”

Posted on May 20, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, the Love Boat has a few special passengers.

Episode 7.21 “Ace’s Valet/Mother Comes First/Hit or Miss America”

(Dir by Richard A. Wells, originally aired on February 25th, 1984)

Ace is back from photography school and not a minute too soon because the Love Boat is playing host to not only Miss America Vanessa Williams (playing herself) but also several former Miss Americas. Unfortunately, for Ace, his mother insists that the family valet, Finley (Jeremy Brett), accompany him. Ace decides that Finley needs a distraction …. maybe a girlfriend! Hey, at least one of the former Miss Americas is single….

Meanwhile, Vanessa Williams is getting annoyed with various men hitting on her. In order to get them to leave her alone, she tells them that she has a boyfriend and he’s on the cruise. In fact, he’s working as a bartender on the boat! Tyrone (Glynn Turman) is disappointed but Isaac is overjoyed when he hears that Vanessa is “crazy” about him. Poor Isaac! And actually, poor Vanessa as well. A few months after this episode aired, she stepped down from her position after Penthouse magazine published some risqué pictures that were taken during her modeling days.

Finally, Jenny Rhodes (Audrey Landers) wants her mother, Mrs. Rhodes (Marian Mercer), to find love on the boat. Gopher helps out by wearing bronzer and a fake beard and pretending to be a wealthy and powerful Indian named Punjab. Uhmm …. yeah, I’m not really sure what to say about that. On the one hand, this episode featured the first black Miss America. On the other hand, it also featured Fred Grandy wearing brownface and speaking in a exaggerated Indian accent. It’s as if the show was so proud of itself for not being racist in one story that it didn’t notice that it was being totally racist in another.

So, this was, overall, a pretty stupid episode. I hate to have to say that because I usually really do enjoy The Love Boat. But having Fred Grandy pretend to be Indian and then having Mrs. Rhodes not get upset about the deception just felt …. well, stupid. As for the other two stories, Jeremy Brett was amusing and Ted Lange was, as always, endearing. This could have been a good episode if not for that third story.

Oh well. Not every cruise can be a winner. That said, I know what your main question is about this episode.

Julie didn’t do much this episode. Overall, she really hasn’t done much this entire season. On a scale of one to ten, I would actually give her an 8 as far as this episode goes. I mean, she really did lose it when she saw Ace was back on the boat. For that matter, the Miss Americas all appeared to be in a surprisingly good mood as well. This was the coke cruise.

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 7.18 “Ace in the Hole/Uncle Joey’s Song/Father in the Cradle”

Posted on May 6, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the Love Boat gets a new photographer!

Episode 7.18 “Ace in the Hole/Uncle Joey’s Song/Father in the Cradle”

(Dir by Richard Kinon, originally aired on January 28th, 1984)

This episode featured the usual three story structure. One story I was indifferent too. One story kept me entertained. And one story made me cry.

The story made me cry featured Barnard Hughes as Joseph Stobble, a former kids’s show host who has retired because he feels too old for kids to relate to. Isaac grew up watching Uncle Joey and even gives Uncle Joey a replica of Flapjack, the sock puppet that served as Uncle Joey’s sidekick. Uncle Joey meets Scott Russell (David Faustino), a child who has recently lost his father. Uncle Joey helps Scott deal with his emotions by assuring him that it’s okay to cry.

I cried! Hell, I’m crying just typing this up. Now, I should clarify that I have a reason for crying. The end of May will also be the two-year anniversary of the auto accident that eventually led to my father’s passing on August 19th, 2024. To be honest, there hasn’t been a day over the past two weeks that I haven’t cried at some point. When my father died, I threw myself into taking care of my aunt. After my aunt died (and she died exactly one year after my father), I threw myself into trying to make the holidays perfect for my sisters. And, after that, I threw myself into cleaning the house. Looking back, I understand that I kept throwing myself into new activities because I was trying to outrun just how sad I was. It’s only now that it’s finally all hitting me.

Would I have cried over Uncle Joey’s story if I wasn’t currently feeling sad? I think I would have. It was a sweet story featuring good work from Hughes, Faustino, and the always reliable Ted Lange.

As for the indifferent story, it featured Larry (Michael Spound) getting upset when he meets his mother’s (Lee Meriwether) new husband (Dean-Paul Martin). It turns out the son and the stepdad are both the same age! It was kind of boring, to be honest.

Finally, the third story featured Ted McGinley — yay! — as Ashley “Ace” Covington Evans, the new ship’s photographer! Gopher hired him but he soon regrets it when all the women on board fall for Ave instead of Doc and Gopher. However, Ace has a problem. He’s a good photographer but he doesn’t know how to develop film! (My first thought was that surely someone on the ship had to have a laptop and a printer but then I realized that this was apparently before the age of even digital cameras.) The ship’s passengers and Stubing are curious as to why Ace hasn’t put up any of the pictures that he’s taken. Vicki and Julia help out by putting up a bunch of pictures from a past cruise….

(Uhmm, how would that help? I would assume that the passengers would expect to see pictures of themselves.)

Ace comes clean to the Captain and offers to spend three weeks learning how to develop film. “Then we shall see you in three weeks,” a very understanding Stubing replies. (Stubing perhaps knows that Vicki would never forgive him for firing Ace.)

Why did this story work so well? Ted McGinley, that’s why! And now, apparently, Ted’s a new cast member. YAY! The Love Boat is going to be better than ever!

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 7.3 “Bricker’s Boy/Lotions of Love/The Hustlers”

Posted on January 14, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, Doc Bricker gets a surprise!

Episode 7.3 “Bricker’s Boy/Lotions of Love/The Hustlers”

(Dir by Jerome Courtland, originally aired on October 8th, 1983)

Doc Bricker has a son!

Well, actually, it’s more a case of David (Timothy Patrick Murphy) claiming to be Doc’s son. It turns out that David’s mother was one of Doc’s ex-girlfriends. By the end of the cruise, Doc has fully accepted David as his son but then David admits that he’s been lying the whole time. Doc is not his father. However, he wishes that Doc was his father. So, Doc — who has got to be the most understanding guy on the planet — adopts him. Vicki has a crush on the loser and Captain Stubing seems to be okay with that, despite the fact that David is a liar who took a cruise without even bothering to buy a ticket. Seriously, I’m kind of worried about Vickie at this point. She’s so bereft of friends her own age that she falls in love with every teenage boy who boards the ship.

While Vicki is busy making a bad decision, gigolo Gary Thomas (Ted McGinley) is traveling with his employer, Arlene (Vera Miles). Gary falls for Fran (Constance Forslund), who is traveling with her sugar daddy, Roy (Chuck Connors). Luckily, Arlene falls for Roy, which frees Gary up to date Fran. Wow, what a sleazy story! I mean, it’s probably as close to real life as this show ever got but still….

Finally, advertising executive Andy O’Neal (Brodie Greer) works on a perfume campaign and ends up falling in love with his client’s flighty daughter (Lydia Cornell). Good for them!

Yeesh. I usually love The Love Boat but this sure was a bland episode! Not even Ted McGinley pretending to be a gigolo could liven this one up. I will say that Bernie Kopell once again proved himself to be far better than the material that he had to work with. But otherwise, this episode was pretty dull.

How coked up was Julie? Obviously nowhere near enough.

Guilty Pleasure No. 94: Revenge of the Nerds (dir. by Jeff Kanew)

Posted on December 18, 2025 by Arleigh

Revenge of the Nerds captures the wild, unfiltered spirit of 1980s college comedies, blending underdog triumph with over-the-top raunchiness that feels both nostalgic and awkwardly dated today. Released in 1984, this Jeff Melman-directed flick stars Robert Carradine and Anthony Edwards as Lewis and Gilbert, two freshmen nerds who face relentless bullying from the jock-dominated Alpha Beta fraternity at Adams College. What starts as a straightforward tale of misfits fighting back evolves into a chaotic mix of pranks, parties, and questionable morals, making it a polarizing watch that still packs a punch for fans of the era’s humor.

The story kicks off with Lewis and Gilbert arriving full of optimism, only to have their dreams torched—literally—when the Alpha Betas accidentally burn down their dorm during a hazing gone wrong. Relocated to a rundown gym with other campus outcasts, the nerds band together under the banner of Tri-Lam, turning their rejection into fuel for clever retaliation. From panty raids to talent show showdowns, the film barrels through a series of escalating antics, peaking at the Greek Games where brains battle brawn in absurd competitions like tricycle races and tug-of-war twists. It’s pure 80s escapism, with a runtime under 100 minutes that keeps the energy high and the laughs coming in rapid-fire succession, even if not every gag is a home run.

The nerd ensemble steals the show, each character a walking stereotype brought to vivid life. Carradine’s Lewis is the slick-talking instigator with a knack for schemes, while Edwards’ Gilbert provides the earnest heart, delivering a pivotal speech about acceptance that gives the movie unexpected emotional depth. Curtis Armstrong as Booger delivers unforgettable gross-out moments, from belching symphonies to shameless flirtations, and Larry B. Scott’s Lamar brings flamboyant athletic flair that subverts expectations. The jocks, led by Ted McGinley’s smug Stan, serve as perfect foils—arrogant, muscle-bound villains who embody the era’s macho excess. Supporting turns, like Julia Montgomery’s Betty navigating boyfriend drama, John Goodman’s boorish Coach Harris, or Bernie Casey’s wise U.N. Jefferson, add layers to the campus power struggle.

Humor-wise, Revenge of the Nerds leans hard into juvenile territory: fart jokes, streaking, and wild panty raid sequences filmed with hidden cameras that push boundaries even for the time. The film’s climax involves Lewis impersonating Stan to woo Betty, a plot point that plays as triumphant revenge but lands as deeply problematic through today’s lens, highlighting consent issues amid the cheers. Similarly, the sorority spying and casual objectification reflect 80s attitudes toward women and minorities that feel crass now, contributing to its mixed modern reception. Yet, these elements are balanced by genuine camaraderie among the nerds, fostering a sense of belonging that resonates as a counter to real-world bullying.

Technically, the movie holds up as a product of its time. The soundtrack, featuring the iconic title track by The Rubinoos and funky cues during party scenes, amps up the fun, while practical effects like the nerds’ gadget-filled house add quirky charm. Cinematography emphasizes the divide between polished frat row and the nerds’ scrappy turf, with wide shots of campus chaos underscoring the rebellion. Written by Tim Metcalfe, Steve Zacharias, and Jeff Buhai, the script zings with quotable lines—”We are the sons of the sons of bitches”—and smartly flips the slobs-vs-snobs formula by rooting for the geeks.

Culturally, Revenge of the Nerds helped define the “nerd pride” archetype, paving the way for films like PCU and influencing pop culture’s embrace of geek culture from The Big Bang Theory to Marvel dominance. It spawned three sequels, a musical adaptation, and endless references, cementing its place as a time capsule of Reagan-era college life—rowdy, rebellious, and unapologetically politically incorrect. For balance, its strengths lie in infectious energy, memorable characters, and a pro-outsider message, but weaknesses include uneven pacing in setup scenes and humor that too often punches down rather than up.

The film continues the trend of 80s raunchy teen comedies first popularized by Bob Clark’s Porky’s, ramping up the gross-out gags and frat-house antics while shifting the focus to nerd empowerment over sexual hijinks. The nerds’ talent show finale, uniting misfits in a joyous medley, delivers pure catharsis, proving brains and heart can topple bullies. It’s not flawless—some jokes bomb, and the ending rushes a bit—but its scrappy spirit endures for those who grew up quoting Booger’s lines or cheering Tri-Lam’s win. Fans of Animal House or Old School will find familiar thrills, while modern audiences might prefer the cleaner satire of The Good Place. Ultimately, Revenge of the Nerds earns a solid recommendation with caveats: a rowdy good time if you roll with the 80s vibe, but skip if consent gags are deal-breakers.

Previous Guilty Pleasures

Holidays on the Lens: Christmas Reservations (dir by Deanne Foley)

Posted on December 8, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Melissa Joan Hart — Sabrina! — plays the events coordinator at a ski lodge in this 2019 Christmas movie. It’s the holiday season and the everyone wants to go skiing …. including her ex-boyfriend!

I like this film. It has nice scenery, it has holiday cheer, it has Ted McGinley, and it has Melissa Joan Hart. It has all the necessary ingredients for a fun Lifetime holiday film.

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 6.29 “Fountain of Youth/Bad Luck Cabin/Uncle Daddy”

Posted on December 3, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, the sixth season of The Love Boat comes to a close.

Episode 6.29 “Fountain of Youth/Bad Luck Cabin/Uncle Daddy”

(Dir by Robert Scheerer, originally aired on May 7th,1983)

The sixth season of The Love Boat ends on a rather silly note.

A newlywed couple (David Naughton and Lynda Goodfriend) board the ship and a coked-up Julia assigns them to a cabin that is known for being cursed. Couples who stay in the cabin always break up. Gopher and Julie try to make sure that the couple doesn’t fall victim to the curse.

Henry Harper (Ted McGinley), who appears to be in his 20s, boards the boat and tells elderly Dwight Schofield (David Wayne) that he’s the same Henry Harper that Dwight went to college with. Henry claims that he’s discovered the Fountain of Youth! Actually, this Henry Harper is the grandson of the original Henry Harper and this is all an elaborate scheme to get revenge on Dwight for cheating the first Henry Harper out of an oil well. Dwight, however, falls for it and tries to buy the Fountain of Youth. Grandson Henry, meanwhile, falls in love with Dwight’s granddaughter (Michele Tobin) who is all like, “I like you but I can’t be with someone from the Twilight Zone.” Grandson Henry eventually admits the truth and all is …. forgiven? Really?

Those two stories were pretty dumb. Fortunately, the third story was an Isaac story and, as he always did whenever he got a chance in the spotlight, Ted Lange really delivered. Isaac wants to marry Gayle Davis (Tracy Reed) so he can become the stepfather of Bobby Davis (Shavar Ross). In the end, Isaac realizes that he doesn’t love Gayle and the marriage wouldn’t work. It was a pretty simple story but Lange always did such a good job of portraying Isaac’s essential decency that it was hard not to get caught up in whether or not he was actually going to leave the Love Boat crew. Fortunately, Isaac will still be pouring drinks during season 7.

This is not only the final Love Boat episode of Season 6 but it’s also my final Love Boat episode of 2025. Retro Television Reviews is taking a break for the holidays so that I can focus on both the Awards Season and Christmas movies. The Love Boat will return on January 7th, 2026.

October Positivity: Redeemed (dir by David A.R. White)

Posted on October 19, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

In 2014’s Redeemed, Ted McGinley plays Paul Tyson.

Paul is married to Beth (Teri Copley) and is a respected businessman who is in charge of a cybersecurity firm. His latest project is Jericho which, if successful, could revolutionize the way that information is protected online. A Brazilian firm is interested in buying Paul’s company, which could make Paul a very wealthy man.

However, Paul has some secrets. Work on Jericho has not gone as smoothly as one might hope and Paul suspects that it might be due to corporate espionage. Paul is several thousand dollars in debt and the bank has been sending him threatening letters. When Paul’s friend David (David A.R. White, who also directed) splits with his wife, Paul starts to wonder whether any marriage can survive the modern age. How do you keep a marriage strong in an increasingly complicated world? Paul and Beth are supposed to be renewing the vows in the near-future but Paul is preoccupied with both his job and what appears to be a massive mid-life crisis.

Temptation arrives in the form of Julia (Ana Ayora), a beautiful woman who has been sent from Brazil to check out the company. Paul finds himself attracted to Julia and they bond over many a night of corporate intrigue. Paul finds himself growing distant from Beth. Is Paul going to cheat and destroy his marriage?

(Actually, David explains that Paul is already cheating just by spending time with a woman other than this wife. David also explains that he’s not the one who cheated in his marriage. Instead, his wife met some guy in an Internet chatroom and she’s been talking to him nonstop. They haven’t even met but it’s enough for David to move out of his house and into a hotel. So, remember — if you’re married and you have any close friends of the opposite sex, you’re just a cheatin’ whore. Sorry, I didn’t make the rules.)

Will Paul remain faithful to Beth? And will he ever discover who is trying to sabotage Jericho?

On the positive side, Redeemed features Ted McGinley in a dramatic lead role and McGinley does a pretty good job with it. There are a few times when Paul is simply too naive to be believable but that’s due to the script and not due to McGinley’s performance. McGinley does the best he can with the material that he’s been given to work with. I will also point out that the stock footage of Brazil was lovely. Finally, David A.R. White is a pleasant-enough actor and his direction here gives the entire film a comfortable Lifetime sort of fell.

On the negative side …. ugh, that plot. The corporate espionage stuff was hokey and Paul’s indecision about whether or not to commit adultery made his character seem more than a little flakey. Paul’s married to a very tolerant and understanding woman and he has a beautiful family. The fact that Paul was so easily tempted to throw all that away makes it difficult to have much sympathy for his character and it also makes his eventual “redemption” a bit difficult to buy. I think most genuinely good husbands would be able to decide not to cheat on their wives without having to fly off to Brazil to think about it. In the end, the film is very forgiving of Paul but it doesn’t convince the audience to feel the same way.

Redeemed is a film that celebrates marriage and leaves one appreciating divorce.

Physical Evidence (1989, directed by Michael Crichton)

Posted on April 21, 2025 by Jedadiah Leland

Ex-cop Joe Paris (Burt Reynolds) is arrested for the murder of a small-time criminal. Joe swears that he’s being framed but his public defender, Jenny Hudson (Theresa Russell), isn’t sure that she believes him. While Jenny’s boyfriend (Ted McGinley) makes a fortune trading stocks and Joe’s former mistress (Kay Lenz) tries to keep her mobster boyfriend from finding out about the affair, Jenny tries to outsmart prosecutor James Nicks (Ned Beatty) and Joe tries to find the real killer.

Tubi sent me to this film after I finished up Raw Justice. When I saw that it was a Burt Reynolds films, I figured that I would take a chance with it but this one turned out to be one of Burt’s lesser films. Joe Paris feels like he might be distantly related to the cop that Burt played in Sharky’s Machine but Physical Evidence doesn’t have any of that movie’s style or grit. Burt doesn’t come across like he wants to be in the movie and he and a very miscast Theresa Russell have next to zero chemistry onscreen. This was Michael Crichton’s last film as a director and he directs in a stolid, made-for-television manner.

Supposedly, this was originally meant to be a sequel to the thriller Jagged Edge, with Glenn Close and Robert Loggia reprising their roles from the earlier film. When that fell through, the movie was refurbished into Physical Evidence, with Theresa Russell and Burt Reynolds replacing Close and Loggia. I think the film would have worked with Close and Loggia because, based on Jagged Edge, they were believable as people who had a close relationship and would do anything to help each other. Burt Reynolds and Theresa Russell come across like they can’t even stand to be in the same room together. Better get a new lawyer, Burt! This one seems like she might be planning on framing you herself.

I Watched Major League: Back To The Minors (1998, Dir. by John Warren)

Posted on April 8, 2025 by Dazzling Erin

Roger Dorn (Corbin Bernsen), the former third baseman for the Cleveland Indians, is the new owner of the Minnesota Twins. There’s a hotshot hitter playing for the Buzz, the Twins’s Minor League affiliate. Downtown Anderson (Walton Goggin) can hit the ball over the fences but he still needs to learn about teamwork before he’ll be ready to move up to the majors. Roger recruits an old friend, an aging pitcher named Gus Cantrell (Scott Bakula), to manage the Buzz and mentor Downtown. Under Gus’s leadership, the Buzz starts winning games. Even some former Indians, like Pedro Cerrano (Dennis Haysbert) and Taka Tanaka (Takaaki Ishibashi), are recruited to play for the Buzz. When the manager of the Twins, Leonard Huff (Ted McGinley), insults Gus and the Buzz over dinner, Gus challenges the Twins to an exhibition game, the minors against the majors. Huff accepts the challenge.

I had always heard that Major League: Back To The Minors was the worst of three Major League films but I liked it. It wasn’t as good as the first one but it wasn’t as boring as the second one. A lot of it has to do with the cast, who give it their all. Walton Goggins is great as the cocky Downtown Anderson but really, all of the actors playing entire team did a good job. They’re all misfits, of course. I especially liked Doc (Peter Mackenzie), a medical student-turned-pitcher who has the slowest fastball in the game. This movie had a little of the warmth and insider humor that made the first Major League film so special. It’s an underdog story, with the minor league players proving that they’re just as good as the spoiled players in the big leagues.

I didn’t find the idea of an exhibition game between the Twins and the Buzz to be believable. In the movie, they actually play two games against each other and they both take place during the regular season. When did they find the time to play each other? I guess they gave up one of their travel days but it still doesn’t seem like something that would happen.

I enjoyed this movie more than I thought I would. It helped that I love baseball. And I love the minor leagues, even if they don’t get the same respect as the majors. Some of the best baseball I’ve ever seen has been in minor league games. They may not have the huge contracts but they’ve got the talent, they’ve got something to prove, and they’ve got the love of the game.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 6.8 “The Kleptomaniac/Thank God I’m A Country Girl”

Posted on March 11, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites. Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week, we’re reminded that Fantasy Island is apparently the country music capitol of the world.

Episode 6.8 “The Kleptomaniac/Thank God I’m A Country Girl”

(Dir by Don Weis, originally aired on December 11th, 1982)

Fred Simpson (Sherman Hemsley) is a kleptomaniac. Whenever he sees anything shiny, he hears a bong in his head, explosions occur behind his eyes, and he has to steal it. He always returns what he steals and pays back his friends but it’s still ruining his life. No one trusts him. He comes to Fantasy Island looking to be cured. Mr. Roarke assigns Tattoo to keep an eye on Fred on the Island. Unfortunately, Fred is still driven to steal an expensive necklace from courier Emily Carlisle (Roxie Roker). Fred and Tattoo end up in jail! Poor Tattoo!

(Seriously, what did Roarke think would happen when he gave that assignment to Tattoo?)

Now, to be honest, I’m not sure that Fred actually got his fantasy. He and Emily do fall in love and he leaves the Island with her but I’m not sure his kleptomania was cured. Maybe Emily will provide whatever was missing from his life that caused him to steal. This episode is somewhat progressive in that acknowledges that kleptomania is an uncontrollable impulse, one that is usually linked to trauma. (After my parents got divorced, I went through a phase of regularly skipping school so I could shoplift makeup from Target. It was probably a cry for help on my part, though it just seemed like an adrenaline rush at the time.) Still, what happens if Fred and Emily break up? Fred’s got a serious problem and I hate to think that he spent all that money to come to Fantasy Island just so he could go home and get tossed in prison.

Meanwhile, Loretta Wentworth (Loretta Lynn) works at the local Fantasy Island diner. Lorraine Wentworth (Heather Locklear), the daughter that Loretta gave up for adoption years ago, is coming to the Island to meet her mother for the first time. Loretta’s fantasy is to be rich for the weekend. Roarke gives her a nice house and a bunch of servants. Lorraine is impressed until her jerk of a fiancé (Ted McGinley) tries to put the moves on Loretta. In the end, things work out, of course. Lorraine and Loretta grow close. Loretta and her friends board a bus and say they’re going to Nashville so that Loretta can pursue her country music career. How is anyone going to drive from Fantasy Island to Nashville? There’s a big old ocean in the way.

This episode really didn’t do much for me, despite the presence of Heather Locklear and Ted McGinley. It was nice to see Tattoo get involved in someone’s fantasy and Roarke got to give a speech about the true meaning of love but neither fantasy really worked for me. Loretta Lynn was a great singer but a very stiff actress. This trip to the Island was not as memorable as it could have been.