I’ll admit, watching the trailer for A24’s Marcel The Shell With Shoes, I was a little amused. The story of a Shell looking to find their family is cute, but once Phil Collins’ “Take Me Home” kicked in, I was hooked. A24 is known for being weird, and this doesn’t look like it’ll disappoint.
Marcel The Shell With Shoes On stars Jenny Slate (Zootopia), Rosa Salazar (Alita: Battle Angel), and Isabella Rossellini (Death Becomes Her), and will be released this June.
The Hollywood Critics Association was, up until a few days ago, known as the Los Angeles Online Film Critics Society. Perhaps realizing that HCA just plans looks better than LAOFCS, they announced yesterday that they were changing their name.
They also announced their nominees for the best of films and performances of 2019! While the HCA may not be one of the major precursors of awards season, their nominations do give a fairly good picture of which films and performances are currently being touted as possible Oscar nominees.
And here they are:
BEST PICTURE
BEST ACTOR
BEST ACTRESS
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
BEST MALE DIRECTOR
BEST FEMALE DIRECTOR
ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR OR ACTRESS 23 AND UNDER
BREAKTHROUGH PERFORMANCE
BEST CAST
BEST FIRST FEATURE
BEST INDEPENDENT FILM
BEST ACTION/WAR FILM
BEST ANIMATED FILM
BEST BLOCKBUSTER
BEST COMEDY/MUSICAL
BEST DOCUMENTARY
BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
BEST HORROR FILM
BEST ANIMATED OR VFX PERFORMANCE
BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY
BEST COSTUME DESIGN
BEST EDITING
BEST HAIR AND MAKEUP
BEST ORIGINAL SONG
BEST SCORE
BEST STUNT WORK
BEST VISUAL EFFECTS
The winners will announced in December!
Here are a few good things about Maze Runner: The Death Cure.
First off, and most importantly, Dylan O’Brien is still alive. When The Death Cure first went into production way back in 2016, O’Brien was seriously injured on the set. While it’s never really been disclosed just how serious the injuries were, they were bad enough that it took O’Brien several months to recover. There was even some speculation that his career might be over. Fortunately, that wasn’t the case. Last year, O’Brien returned to the screen and gave a superior performance as the lead in American Assassin. In The Death Cure, O’Brien returns as Thomas and even if the character is still a bit of cipher, O’Brien does a good job playing him.
Secondly, Gally lives! In the first Maze Runner, Gally was a villain but, because he was played by Will Poulter, he was also strangely likable. Maze Runner was the first film in which I ever noticed Will Poulter and I have to admit that I’ve always felt that both the actor and the character deserved better than to be casually killed off at the end of the first movie. Since Maze Runner, Poulter has given great performances in both The Revenant and Detroit. (He was also briefly cast as Pennywise in It, though the role was ultimately played by Bill Skarsgard.) In The Death Cure, it is not only revealed that Gally is still alive but he also finally gets to be one of the good guys.
Third, the Death Cure confirms what I felt when I first saw The Maze Runner. Wes Ball is a talented director. Despite whatever narrative flaws that the Maze Runner films may have, they’re always watchable. Death Cure opens with a genuinely exciting action sequence and there are more than a few visually striking shots.
Fourth, Death Cure actually ends the Maze Runner saga. That may sound like a strange or back-handed compliment but it’s not. Death Cure resists the temptation to try to milk more money out of the franchise by unnecessarily splitting the finale in two. I’ve always felt that The Hunger Games made a huge mistake with its two-part finale. (The first part was good but the second part dragged.) Divergent appears to be destined to be forever unfinished because the first part of it’s two-part finale bombed at the box office. Death Cure refuses to indulge in any of that nonsense. Unfortunately, this also means that Death Cure ends up lasting an unwieldy 142 minutes but still, that’s better than forcing the film into two parts. With the current YA dysptopia cycle winding down, now is the right time to end things.
Finally, I appreciated the fact that the bad guys in Death Cure were named WCKD. There’s nothing subtle about that but this isn’t a movie the demands subtlety. As opposed to many other films based on dystopian YA fiction, The Maze Runner films have always been aware of just how ludicrous they often are. Unlike the Divergent films or The Fifth Wave, the Maze Runner films have always been smart enough not to take themselves too seriously.
Anyway, as for Death Cure itself, it’s big and noisy and your enjoyment will largely depend on how much you remember about the first two films. It’s been nearly three years since The Scorch Trials came out, which is an eternity when it comes to a franchise like Maze Runner. Death Cure pretty much jumps right into the action and if you don’t remember all of the details from the first two films … well, good luck getting caught up! (Unfortunately, it doesn’t help that, while the first movie was fun, Scorch Trials was a lot easier to forget.) It’s pretty much a typical tale of YA dystopia, complete with tragic deaths, shocking betrayal, and a chosen one. If you’re a fan of the previous two films or the books, you’ll probably enjoy Death Cure. For the rest of us, it’s a bit of a confusing ride but at least there’s a lot of up-and-coming talent on display.
Based on the campy 70s cop show that will live on forever in syndication, CHiPs is about two unlikely partners who, after a rough beginning, work together to catch a cop’s killer and capture a gang of armed robbers.
Officer Jon Baker (Dax Shepherd) is a flaky former motocross champion who joins the California Highway Patrol to try to impress his estranged wife (Kristen Bell). Baker pops painkillers like candy, throws up whenever he enters an unfamiliar house, and has a knee that randomly goes out. Baker can’t shoot, fight, or think but he sure can ride a bike.
Officer Francis Llewelyn “Ponch” Poncherello (Michael Pena) is actually an FBI agent named Castillo who has been assigned to work undercover to investigate corruption in the CHP. Ponch is a sex addict who is obsessed with yoga pants and who keeps accidentally shooting his former partner (Adam Brody).
Both Baker and Ponch are given one identifying characteristic. Baker’s thing is that he always says the wrong thing and then apologizes. Ponch’s thing is that he always says the wrong thing and then doesn’t apologize. That is about as deep as things get.
I’m not really sure who this movie is supposed to appeal to. Michael Pena and Dax Shepard have been good in other productions but they’re both awful here, let down by a script that does not have much to offer beyond tepid bromance and dick jokes. The humor is too deliberately lowbrow and raunchy to appeal to the people who were fans of the quaintly innocent TV show but it’s also neither meta nor clever enough to appeal to the audience that made hits out of 21 and 22 Jump Street. I guess the ideal audience for this film would be people who still find gay panic jokes to be hilarious because CHiPs is full of them. If the last movie you saw was made in 1999 and starred Adam Sandler and David Spade, CHiPs might be right up your alley.
CHiPs is a terrible fucking movie but what really distinguishes it from other terrible movies is the amount of contempt that it seems to have for its source material. The Jump Street movies might have poked fun at the TV series that inspired them but it was still obvious that the films were being made by fans. CHiPs can’t even be bothered to use the original’s theme music as anything other than a way to punctuate a few cheap jokes. Erik Estrada, the original Ponch, does have a cameo but only so he and the new Ponch can talk about eating ass in Spanish. Otherwise, there is nothing that links the movie to the TV show. A more accurate title would have been Two Assholes On Motorcycles, except the motorcycles really are not that important to the film. So, I guess the title would actually just have to be Two Assholes. That sounds about right to me.
CHiPs proves that not every stupid cop show needs a movie version. Now, excuse me while I get back to work on my T.J. Hooker spec script…
Here are 6 films that I saw during the first half of 2015. Some of them are on Netflix and some of them were major studio releases. Some of them are worth seeing. Some of them most definitely are not.
Avengers Grimm (dir by Jeremy M. Inman)
Obviously made to capitalize on the popularity of Avengers: Age of Ultron, Avengers Grimm opens with a war in the world of fairy tales. Evil Rumpelstiltskin (Casper Van Dien) uses Snow White’s (Laura Parkinson) magic mirror to cross over into our world and he takes Snow White with him! It’s now up to Cinderella (Milynn Sharley), Sleeping Beauty (Marah Fairclough), and Rapunzel (Rileah Vanderbilt) to cross over into our world, save Snow White, and defeat Rumpelstiltskin. Also sneaking over is rebellious Red Riding Hood (Elizabeth Petersen) who is determined to kill Rumpelstiltskin’s henchman, The Wolf (Kimo Leopoldo).
Got all that?
Avengers Grimm is another enjoyably insane mockbuster from The Asylum. The budget’s low, the performances are intentionally melodramatic, and it’s all lot of fun. Casper Van Dien has a lot of fun playing evil, the women all get to kick ass, and Lou Ferrigno is well-cast as a labor leader named Iron John.
Avengers Grimm is currently available on Netflix.
Bad Asses On The Bayou (dir by Craig Moss)
Apparently, this is the third film in which Danny Trejo and Danny Glover have respectively played Frank Vega and Bernie Pope, two old guys who kick ass in between worrying about their prostates. I haven’t seen the previous two Bad Asses films but I imagine that it really doesn’t matter.
In this film, Trejo and Glover go to Louisiana to attend a friend’s wedding. When she’s kidnapped, they have to rescue her and impart some important life lessons to her younger brother. It’s all pretty predictable but then again, it’s also pretty good for a film called Bad Asses On The Bayou. This is a film that promises two things: Danny Trejo kicking ass and lots of bayou action. And it delivers on both counts.
In fact, I would say that Bad Asses On The Bayou is a better showcase for Danny Trejo’s unique style than the better known Machete films. Danny Trejo is a surprisingly adept comedic actor and he gives a performance here that shows his talent goes beyond mere physical presence.
Bad Asses On The Bayou is currently available on Netflix.
Hayride 2 (dir by Terron R. Parsons)
I should admit up front that I haven’t seen the first Hayride film. Luckily, Hayride 2 picks up directly from the end of the first film and is filled with so many flashbacks and so much conversation about what happened that it probably doesn’t matter.
Essentially, Pitchfork (Wayne Dean) is a murderous urban legend who turns out to be real. He killed a lot of people in the first film and he stalks those that escaped throughout the 2nd film. Like all good slasher villains, Pitchfork is a relentless killer. He’s also an unrepentant racist, which leads to a genuinely unpleasant scene where he attacks a black detective (Corlandos Scott). Say whatever else you will about the film, Hayride 2 deserves some credit for being on the side of the victims. No attempt is made to turn Pitchfork into an anti-hero and the movie is relentlessly grim.
Hayride 2 is an odd film. The film’s low-budget is obvious in every single scene. The pacing is abysmal and the performances are amateurish. And yet, when taken on its own meager terms, it has a dream-like intensity to it that I appreciated. Then again, I always have had a weakness for low-budget, regional horror films.
Hayride 2 is available on Netflix.
Insurgent (dir by Robert Schwentke)
Insurgent is both the sequel to Divergent and was also 2015’s first YA dystopia film. Shailene Woodley is as good as ever and I guess it’s good that she has a commercially successful franchise, which will hopefully inspire audiences to track down better Shailene Woodley films like The Spectacular Now.
All that said, Insurgent often felt even more pointless than Divergent. For a two-hour film featuring performers like Woodley, Kate Winslet, Octavia Spencer, Ansel Elgort, and Miles Teller, Insurgent has no excuse for being as forgettable and boring as it actually was. The next installment in The Hunger Games can not get here soon enough.
Poltergeist (dir by Gil Kenan)
When a family (led by Sam Rockwell and Rosemarie DeWitt) move into a new house, they discover that everything is not what it seems. For one thing, they come across a bunch of creepy clown dolls. They also hear a lot of scary sounds. They discover that the house was built on an old cemetery. Their youngest daughter vanishes. And finally, someone says, “Isn’t this like that old movie that was on TCM last night?”
Okay, they don’t actually say that. However, as everyone knows, the 2015 Poltergeist is a remake of the 1982 Poltergeist. Since the 1982 Poltergeist still holds up fairly well, the 2015 Poltergeist feels incredibly unnecessary. It has a few good jump scenes and it’s always good to see Sam Rockwell and Rosemarie DeWitt in lead roles but ultimately, who cares? It’s just all so pointless.
Watch the wall-dancing original. Ignore the remake.
Tomorrowland (dir by Brad Bird)
Welcome to the world of tomorrow! Wow, is it ever boring!
Actually, I feel a little bit bad about just how much I disliked Tomorrowland because this is a film that really did have the best intentions. Watching the film, you get the sinking feeling that the people involved actually did think that they were going to make the world a better place. Unfortunately, their idea of a better world is boring and almost oppressively optimistic. There is no room for cynicism in Tomorrowland. Bleh. What fun is that?
Anyway, the film basically steals its general idea from the Atlas Shrugged trilogy. Tomorrowland is a secret place that is inhabited by inventors, dreamers, and iconoclasts. Years ago, Frank (George Clooney) was banished from Tomorrowland because, after learning that the Earth was destined to end, he lost “hope” in mankind’s future. Fortunately, he meets Casey (Britt Robertson), who is full of hope and through her, he gets to return. They also get a chance to save the world and battle a cartoonish super villain played by Hugh Laurie. (Why is he a villain? Because he’s played by Hugh Laurie, of course!)
After all the hype and build-up, Tomorrowland turned out to be dull and predictable. What a shame. The Atlas Shrugged trilogy was at least fun because it annoyed the hipsters at the AV Club. Tomorrowland is just forgettable.
Through the Shattered Lens 