Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.
It’s time for another stupid trip to L.A.
Episode 4.5 “Overkill”
(Dir by Sara Rose, originally aired on August 23rd, 1998)
Jamie is learning martial arts from Master Soo Han (Yoshi Jenkins). When she is saved from a group of muggers by a fellow classmate named Kyle (Matty Liu), she starts to fall in love with him. Soon, he is teaching her how to be a better fighter. For some reason, Jamie doesn’t tell Kyle that she’s a cop. That makes things awkward when Kyle realizes that 1) the man who killed his mother is a student in the class and 2) Kyle is being groomed to be a government assassin.
I’ve always said that you can tell when a show has cast a professional athlete in a guest role because the athlete is always the worst actor in the episode. That was certainly the case here. At first, I was sure that Matty Liu was a professional martial artist. It turns out that he’s actually a pro surfer but still, my point stands. It doesn’t matter how many camera tricks or jump cuts the show uses to make Liu look like a badass, he’s still an amazingly stiff actor. The scenes of him and Jamie falling in love don’t work because he’s not capable of showing any emotion, let alone love.
Speaking of love, Chris is still mad that her husband didn’t select her to be promoted to sergeant. When she discovers a murder victim, she impresses Homicide Detective Thomas (Carl T. Evans) by figuring out that the victim died from a — wait for it — broken neck. WOW! Amazing deduction, Chris! I mean, how difficult is it to spot a broken neck? Even though Chris is neither a medical examiner nor a detective, Thomas invites her to fill in for a sick Homicide detective. Chris accepts.
TC’s not happy about that! Actually, TC’s never happy. He’s been in charge of Pacific Blue for five episodes now and he hasn’t smiled once. He has spent a lot of time glaring. In fact, both he and Cory spend most of their time glaring at other people now. I guess that’s what you do when you’re in charge, management by glaring.
Finally, Bobby and Spazz compete over — wait a minute, I got a name wrong there. What is Spazz’s real name? Is it Granger? Yeah, okay, sorry about that. Bobby and Granger serve as body guards for a French actress (Lydie Denier), who claims that she’s being stalked. Bobby has seen all of her films but she’s more attracted to Spazz, for some reason. Sorry, Bobby! I would have picked you.
Anyway, this was one of Pacific Blue’s dumbest episodes yet. Chris is even more whiny than usual. TC and Cory are useless. Jamie and Kyle’s fight scenes are edited in such a way that one gets dizzy trying to follow them. This episode featured bad acting and worst direction, No wonder Chris wants to transfer to Homicide.
Last night, I was tying to not scream in frustration. Tonight, I’m cheering!
After last night’s humiliating loss, I had to share our victory today. It wasn’t necessarily a pretty victory. The Astros never should have gotten within three runs of tying up the game. But it’s a victory all the same. It’s a win and I’m happy!
Todd (Zach Galligan) is married to Emily (Krista Errickson), who was previously involved with Todd’s brother, Berke (Michael Bowen). When Berke comes by for a visit, he discovers that Emily is cheating on Todd with Darcy (Luca Bercovici). A confrontation between Emily, Berke, and Darcy ends with Darcy dead. While covering up the murder, Emily is also plotting to take all of Todd’s money for herself. David Warner appears as the therapist who struggles to keep straight who is double-crossing who.
In the 90s, where could you see the lead of Gremlins being betrayed by both his sexy wife and his no-good brother? Where, in the 90s, could you see the star of Hello Larry try to reboot her career as a Kathleen Turner film fatale? Where, in the 90s, could you see the man who would one day play Buck in Kill Bill playing Zach Galligan’s long-haired brother? Only on Cinemax!
Mortal Passions was an attempt to do a modern noir and it has all of the expected tropes, from the clueless husband to the morally gray relative to the wife who is planning on betraying everyone. Krista Errickson is sexy and dangerous as Emily, ruthlessly plotting Todd’s downfall while walking around in lingerie. Errickson’s femme fatale is never as clever as she thinks she is but fortunately, for her, all the men around her are idiots. Galligan and Bowen are both believable as two of the most easily manipulated people that you’ll ever meet. And then there’s David Warner, phoning it in and getting away with it because he’s David Warner.
Mortal Passions is Late Night Cinemax at its trashiest best!
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00. The show is currently on Prime.
This week, it’s time to learn a lesson about giving blood.
Episode 2.4 “Blood Money”
(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on September 17th, 1994)
Megan is running the school blood drive but no one wants to give blood. Mr. Belding tries to teach everyone a lesson by volunteering but he’s informed by nurse Penny Brady (Emma Caulfield) that he has high cholesterol. Not only does Belding need to start an exercise regimen but he’s apparently too fat to chaperone the school’s hiking trip.
Not wanting the school’s butch gym teacher to chaperone the trip, Brian decides that Screech should be the chaperone. However, Screech is depressed because he has a crush on Penny but he can’t work up the courage to ask her out. Brian tells Penny that he’ll get everyone in the school to donate blood if she agrees to go out with Screech….
Ugh. This is another Screech-is-in-love episode. Dustin Diamond was nowhere near as bad during season 2 as he would be in later seasons but still, watching the previously asexual Screech date someone is not a pleasant experience. Penny discovers that she actually likes Screech (why?) but then Screech hears that she was bribed to go out with him and he gets his feelings hurt.
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE HIKING TRIP?
Seriously, screw the hiking trip. Why is this school always sponsoring a trip somewhere? Just give people their diplomas and stay out of their lives….
Oh no, Tommy D’s previously unseen best friend was in a motorcycle accident! And he has a very rare blood type! Only Screech can save him! Screech gives blood, everyone apologizes for setting him up, and Screech agrees to chaperone the trip and to continue dating Penny. I’m going to guess that didn’t last since Screech ended up dating Allison while working at the country club over the summer.
Meanwhile, some poor biker has gallons of Screech inside of him.
What an episode. The whole problem with the first season is that the students were not very likable. Now, the show actually has likable students but all of the attention is on Screech. It’s like this show just wanted to fail!
“I used to be a regular sheriff.” — Sheriff Ulysses
Ben Wheatley has built a career on making audiences uncomfortable. From the cultish dread of Kill List to the seasick chaos of Free Fire, he specializes in a specific kind of British miserablism that suddenly snaps into shocking ultraviolence. So, the idea of him directing a snowbound, American action-comedy starring Bob Odenkirk felt a little like hiring a surgeon to cater a birthday party. You know the food will be technically proficient, but you are terrified of what might be in the sauce. The 2026 film Normal, written by Derek Kolstad and Bob Odenkirk, is exactly that catering job: it is messy, bloody, surprisingly filling, and leaves you with a weird stomach ache if you think about it too long. But in a summer movie season often defined by joyless CGI sludge, Normal is a blast of R-rated, mid-budget freshness that knows exactly how stupid it is, even if it stumbles on its way to the finish line.
The premise is a beautiful piece of elevator pitch simplicity. Odenkirk plays Sheriff Ulysses, a haunted, world-weary interim sheriff who takes a short-term gig in the tiny, freezing Minnesotan town of Normal. The previous sheriff died under mysterious circumstances (ice fishing accident, sure), and Ulysses is just looking for a quiet place to drink coffee, ignore his wife’s phone calls, and heal. The problem is that Normal, Minnesota, is anything but. As Ulysses walks the beat, he notices the quiet desperation of rural America has been replaced by a strange, Stepford-like prosperity. The knitting store sells AR-15s. The diner’s walls are lined with loaded rifles. The town has somehow raised sixteen million dollars for a new town hall. It turns out that the citizens of Normal have sold their souls—and their town—to the Yakuza, acting as a quiet, frozen Swiss bank account for Japanese organized crime. When a pair of bumbling out-of-town robbers (Reena Jolly and Brendan Fletcher) hits the local bank, the bulletproof glass shatters, and Ulysses finds himself trapped in a blizzard, fighting for his life against an entire town of friendly, flannel-wearing killers.
Having Odenkirk as co-writer explains a lot about why Normal feels different from Kolstad’s other work. Where John Wick and the first Nobody are lean, machine-tooled scripts, Normal has a looser, more character-obsessed texture. The dialogue is full of weird pauses, non-sequiturs, and the kind of conversational detours that defined Odenkirk’s television work on Better Call Saul. You can feel the actor’s hand in every scene where Ulysses just stares at a absurd situation and mutters something mundane like “Well, that’s not ideal.” If you have seen the Nobody films, you know the rhythm Odenkirk plays as a performer. But what makes Odenkirk so fascinating to watch in Normal is how he continues to solidify an idea we haven’t really seen since Liam Neeson stumbled into Taken: the deeply unconventional action hero. Think about it. Before Neeson, action stars were Schwarzenegger, Stallone, Willis—men built like refrigerators. Then Neeson showed up at fifty-six, all grief-stricken eyebrows and theatrical training, and suddenly audiences realized that a sad dad with a “particular set of skills” was just as terrifying as any bodybuilder. Odenkirk is the spiritual successor to that twist.
No one ever looked at the guy who played slimy lawyer Saul Goodman or the hapless comic from Mr. Show and thought, “There is our next great screen fighter.” Yet here we are, years after the first Nobody, and Odenkirk has quietly become the most believable everyman action lead of his generation. Unlike Neeson’s brooding intensity, Odenkirk brings a specific, almost pathetic vulnerability. In Normal, he excels at playing the “sad dad” action hero—the guy whose joints pop when he stands up, who looks like an accountant but moves like a bar fight. Ulysses isn’t a retired assassin; he’s just a cop who is very, very tired. When he dispatches a thug with a fire extinguisher, there is no cool one-liner, just a wheeze and a wince. That grounded exhaustion is the Odenkirk brand, and because he co-wrote the part, it fits him like a tailored suit. He sells the physicality without losing that “I’m too old for this” shuffle, making you believe a middle-aged man could survive a gauntlet of killers purely out of stubbornness and regret. Henry Winkler, as the smarmy Mayor Kibner, chews the frozen scenery with glee, playing a man so polite and effervescent that you want to punch him immediately. Lena Headey shows up as a barkeep with a shotgun, and while she doesn’t get enough to do, she brings the necessary grit.
However, the secret weapon here is actually Ben Wheatley and his “anti-action” philosophy. In a recent interview, Wheatley described the violence in Normal as being akin to Final Destination. That is the smartest thing about this movie. In a typical John Wick movie, the hero is a force of nature; he actively kills people with surgical precision. In Normal, Ulysses doesn’t so much defeat the town as survive it. In one fantastic set piece, a character slips on ice and impales themselves on their own bayonet. In another, a massive sign falls and crushes a gunman mid-monologue. The town itself becomes a hostile, slippery, glass-strewn deathtrap. This gives Normal a chaotic, Looney Tunes energy that separates it from its cousins. You never know who is going to die next or how, and Wheatley directs the carnage with a blackly comic eye. The sound design of bones crunching against frozen asphalt is disturbingly hilarious. This isn’t the graceful ballet of assassination; it’s the slapstick of murder, and it is refreshing. And Odenkirk’s performance is the perfect anchor for this chaos because he always looks slightly surprised to still be alive—a quality Neeson, for all his skills, rarely conveyed. The fact that Odenkirk helped write the script means those reactions of shock and reluctant disgust feel genuine rather than performed.
But let’s address the moose in the room. Normal desperately wants to be Fargo, but it only has the vocabulary of a comic book. The Coen Brothers’ masterpiece works because the quirky dialogue masks a terrifying emptiness. Normal wears its quirk on its sleeve like a cheap souvenir. The film tries to weave in social commentary about the death of rural America, gun culture, and even features a subplot involving a trans nonbinary teen (Jess McLeod) who was the child of the previous sheriff. These moments are handled with a surprising amount of grace—they aren’t preachy, just present. However, the film is moving so fast (the runtime is a lean 91 minutes) that it forgets to give these themes any weight. You get a five-second shot of a wall of guns, and then someone blows up. The commentary is there, but it’s just set dressing for the explosion.
Furthermore, the plot structure is lopsided. The film opens with a cold sequence in Japan with the Yakuza cutting off fingers and looking menacing. It feels like a contractual obligation to remind you this is from the John Wick universe, and it’s hard not to wonder if that was a Kolstad-driven choice while Odenkirk might have preferred more mystery. It completely spoils the slow-burn reveal of the town’s corruption. Imagine The Wicker Man if the first scene showed you the villagers burning the wicker man. The tension of Ulysses realizing that “the call is coming from inside the house” is neutered because we, the audience, already know the Yakuza are lurking in the basement. Also, for a movie called Normal, it is incredibly predictable within its own lane. Once the shooting starts, you know exactly where Ulysses is going to end up (spoiler: a hardware store and then the police station). The film devolves into a familiar Assault on Precinct 13 siege scenario, and while the kills are inventive, the geography of the action gets muddy. Wheatley shoots the snowy exteriors beautifully—the white landscape makes the red blood pop like neon—but during the frantic third act, the editing gets choppy, and you lose track of who is shooting whom. For a movie that prides itself on “anti-action,” it relies heavily on the generic rhythms of action in its final twenty minutes.
Despite these structural hiccups, Normal works because it never overstays its welcome. At a brisk hour and a half, it gets in, blows up a town, and gets out. Bob Odenkirk continues to prove that he is the most relatable action hero of the 2020s—the natural heir to the “unlikely badass” throne that Liam Neeson occupied for a solid decade. Where Neeson brought Shakespearean tragedy to the genre, Odenkirk brings a frustrated accountant’s fury. He looks like he just finished paying his taxes, and you believe he is furious about it. Having co-written the film only deepens that authenticity; this isn’t a star merely showing up to say lines, but an actor who has shaped the material to his exact strengths. Ben Wheatley manages to smuggle just enough British cynicism and nasty violence into the frame to keep genre fans on their toes.
Is Normal a great film? No. It is too shallow and too structurally messy for that. But is it a great time at the movies? Absolutely. It is the cinematic equivalent of comfort food laced with hot sauce. You know what you are getting, but the kick is still satisfying. For fans of Odenkirk’s grumpy charm and Wheatley’s chaotic tendencies, Normal is a perfectly abnormal way to spend an evening. Just don’t go looking for the heart that the title promises; this one is all viscera. And frankly, in an era where most action movies are built from the same digital spare parts, watching a former comedy writer freeze his way through a Yakuza invasion feels like the most refreshing kind of normal we could ask for.
Worlds of Fantasy was a science fiction pulp magazine that ran for 14 issues, from 1950 to 1954. It doesn’t appear to have been a huge success during its initial run but it lives on due its memorable covers.
“Jerry, I’m not a nice person. I’m a mean, selfish son-of-a-bitch. I know you want a story, but I want a killer and what I want comes first!”
— Detective Leo Kessler (Charles Bronson) in Ten To Midnight (1983)
At first, Detective Leo Kessler seems like exactly the type of cop that you would expect to find in a film about a serial killer who knows how to manipulate the system to his advantage. Kessler is tough, plain-spoken, a blue collar warrior who is trying to keep the streets of Los Angeles safe for citizens of every age.
“I remember when the legal meant lawful,” Kessler says, “Now, it means loophole.”
Kessler isn’t thrilled that his new partner, Paul McAnn (Andrew Stevens), is a graduate of Berkley and that he’s got a degree in sociology. Kessler’s doubts are actually justified. One of the first things that McAnn does is drop a wad of chewing gum on the ground at a crime scene. Kessler also knows that Warren Stacy (Gene Davis) is the psycho who has been targeting young women and making obscene phone calls to his daughter, Laurie (Lisa Eilbacher). When McAnn discovers that Kessler has planted blood evidence on Warren’s clothes, McAnn is torn about what to do. “Forget what’s legal,” Kessler says, “and do what’s right.”
But here’s the thing with Kessler. He may say that he’s a mean son of a bitch but he’s not. He’s actually a pretty nice guy. He even discovers that he likes and becomes a mentor to McAnn. Kessler just doesn’t think that someone like Warren Stacy should be wandering around, free to kill. Charles Bronson never gets nearly enough credit for his acting. Leo Kessler isn’t just a touch cop. He’s an old-fashioned guy in a changing world. He’s someone who doesn’t understand why the system is suddenly more worried about the Warrn Stacys of the world than the victims.
He’s also a father.
Leo: “I hate quiche.”
Laurie: “Why did you get it?”
Leo: “I thought it was pie.”
As violent and exploitive as From 10 To Midnight is, I have to admit that I have a sentimental attachment to the film. The difficult-but-loving relationship between Leo and Laurie Kessler reminds me of my own relationship with my Dad. I see a lot of my Dad in Leo and I also see a lot of myself in Laurie. There’s a scene early on where McAnn mentions to Laurie that she’s a lot like her father.
“You think so?” Laurie replies, “I don’t.”
That scene gets me every time because I’ve had people say the same thing to me about my Dad and I used to have the same response. Everyone else picked up on it long before I realized it. For all of Laurie complaints about Leo having always been too busy for her, she’s there to comfort him after he gets kicked off the force. “I’m getting drunk with my old man,” Laurie says. Leo replies that she’s not.
It’s rare to see Charles Bronson cast as a family man. Usually, he played loners, the type of solitary warriors who seemed to have nothing in their lives beyond doing accomplishing whatever their mission happened to be. The Death Wish films did give Bronson a family but they were all dead by the end of the second film. 10 To Midnight features Bronson as not just a tough cop but also Bronson as a father with an independent and intelligent daughter. I think that’s the main reason why 10 to Midnight is my favorite Bronson films.
“No, we won’t.”
— Detective Leo Kessler
Bronson only fires his gun once in 10 To Midnight but he definitely makes a statement with that shot. And after spending 101 minutes watching Kessler trying to stop Warren Stacy, there’s definitely something very cathartic about the simple brutality of the film’s ending. Trying to analyze or understand evil, the film tells us, is pointless.
Sometimes, you just need someone who is willing to say, “No, we won’t.”
One thing that doesn’t get stated enough in this country is that you’re not required to vote at all. One reason I’ve always disliked all of that “Vote or Die” or “Vote Blue No Matter Who” nonsense is because we don’t have mandatory voting in this country. If you feel neither candidate is up for the job, you have the right to say, “I’m not going to vote for someone I don’t trust.” I also don’t buy into this idea, which is popular amongst far too many people who should know better, that voting third party is the same thing as throwing your vote away. It’s your vote and you get to do with it what you want. If you want to use your vote to protest, that’s your right. If you want to use your vote to vote for the candidate who best reflects your views, that’s also your right.
I usually vote so I can cancel out one my cousin’s vote just by voting against whoever she was supporting. That’s honestly one of the most American things that you can do.
Stephen Colbert’s Next Step:
Last week, as I read story after story about Stephen Colbert’s final episode, it occurred to me that I think I only watched his show once during the entire time it was on the air. It was in 2016. I had a cold and I was pretty much just watching whatever came on the television. The only thing I remember about the show was that Tim Kaine was the guest and he wouldn’t stop playing that stupid harmonica. That was actually the first time I thought to myself, “Hillary might lose.”
Otherwise, I never watched Colbert. That’s really nothing against Stephen Colbert or his show. I may have only one watched one episode of Colbert but that’s one more than I’ve watched of Kimmel, Fallon, or Meyers. It’s just that, when it came to Colbert, his guests never really interested me. I used to see the commercials for Colbert while watching Big Brother and Survivor. His announcer always sounded excited when he said, “Tonight, Colbert’s got Sen. Elizabeth Warren and CNN’s Anderson Cooper!” but myself, I just couldn’t imagine specifically making time to watch a talk/comedy show featuring senators and governors.
For all the attention that was given to his exit by the mainstream media, it ultimately felt rather anti-climatic. One need only compare the drama of Conan’s exit from the TonightShow to see how subdued things really were when it came to Colbert. That said, Stephen will be fine. He’s not being exiled to Elba. If anything, he’ll probably be running for office in 2028.
Fjord!
I actually am looking forward to seeing Fjord, the Romanian film that won the Palme d’Or at Cannes this year. It’s a film about a traditional Catholic family who move to a progressive Norway town and soon find themselves being accused of all sorts of things. Given that the film was directed by Cristian Mungiu, I doubt either side will be portrayed as simplistically as some people online are assuming. Romanian cinema fascinating, if just because the excesses and the downfall of Nicolae Ceaușescu tends to give Romanian filmmakers a unique perspective that a lot of American filmmakers just do not have.
For My Dad:
Today is the two-year anniversary of my Dad’s car accident. On May 26th, 2024, I got a phone call telling me that he had been in an accident and that he was in the hospital with a broken shoulder but that he would be fine. Nearly three months later, he passed away. My Dad liked Lynard Skynard. He liked the Eagles. He liked the Steve Miller Band and old school Aerosmith. He liked that “Money for Nothing” song by the Dire Straits. He even liked Pink Floyd which, to be honest, seems about as far away from Lynard Skynard as you can get. I’m sharing this song for him.
In Conclusion
Now get out there and vote! Or don’t. Do whatever the Hell you want.
For today’s song of the day, we have a classic 1960 instrumental from The Ventures. The baton-twirling cheerleader in the video was lifted from an odd 1963 film called The Yesterday Machine.
Since today is the 119th anniversary of the birth of John Wayne, it only seems right that today’s scene should come from the 1962 classic, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance!
The famous steak scene features three of the greatest screen icons of Hollywood’s golden age: James Stewart, John Wayne, and Lee Marvin. Lee Marvin is the bully who is terrorizing the entire town. James Stewart is the idealist who thinks that the law, and not violence, is the answer. And John Wayne is …. well, he’s John Wayne. He’s the only man in town who can stand up to Lee Marvin but, at the same time, he’s also aware that his time is coming to a close. In the scene below, all three of the characters display their different approaches to life and a disagreement with steak nearly leads to violence.
This scene — and really, the entire film — features these three actors at their best. John Wayne is an actor who is often described as having “just played himself” but that’s really not quite fair. While Wayne’s outsized persona definitely does influence how the audience reacts to any character that he plays, he was a better actor than he’s often given credit for being. That’s especially evident in The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, in which Wayne plays a confident man’s man who knows that fate is closing in on him. The coming of civilization (represented by James Stewart) will be great for the town of Shinbone but it will also leave men like Wayne’s Ton Doniphon with nowhere to go. The coming of civilization means that the heroes of the past are destined to become obsolete.
Enjoy this scene from The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance: