Late Night Retro Television Review: Freddy’s Nightmares 2.9 “Monkey Dreams”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Freddy’s Nightmares, a horror anthology show which ran in syndication from 1988 to 1990. The entire series can be found on Tubi!

This week, Freddy has a message!

Episode 2.9 “Monkey Dreams”

(Dir by Robert Englund, originally aired on December 3rd, 1989)

At a college science lab, Joe (Joseph Cali) tries to communicate with aliens.  Next door, Jeannie (Sharon Mahoney) tries to teach her monkey to speak.  When Joe starts getting strange messages on his computer, he thinks that it’s an alien code.  Then it turns out that it’s actually just the monkey trying to type out its name on its own computer.  Joe is then murdered by his bookie.

Meanwhile, Dr. Lynch (Sherman Howard) is using the monkey for some experiments to see how much pain a living creature can take.  Dr. Lynch seems to change his mind when he hears the monkey speak.  But it turns out that we were just seeing the monkey’s dream.

“Think about it!” Freddy tells us.

Freddy Krueger, animal rights activist?  I guess it makes sense when you consider that Robert Englund directed this episode.  The episode’s message was heartfelt but it seemed a bit out-of-place on a show about a undead child molester.  Whatever message you want to deliver, Freddy Krueger probably isn’t the best one to do it.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 3.16 “Saving Face”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Daily Motion.

This week, things continue to be awkward in Boston.

Episode 3.16 “Saving Face”

(Dir by Charles Braverman, originally aired on January 16th, 1985)

This episode of St. Elsewhere was even busier than usual.

  • Tough-as-nails Dr. Mary Woodley (Karen Austin) has been hired to oversee the ER.  Dr. Fiscus isn’t happy about it.  He’s going to have to work for a woman?  Agck!
  • Dr. Cavanero is also not happy.  Of course, the last time that St. Eligius hired a new female doctor, Cavanero told everyone at the hospital that she was a lesbian and, for some reason, this led to the doctor having to leave town.  (It was the 80s.)  Maybe, just maybe, there are reasons to have doubts about Cavanero’s professionalism.
  • Dr. Westphall shows Dr. Woodley around the hospital and, as usual, comes across as being the saddest man on the planet.
  • Dr. Westphall informs Jack that he will be allowed to continue on as a resident.  However, Westphall also rather glumly states that he will be watching Jack from now on.  Jack better not screw up or Westphall will “come down” on him.  Personally, I think Westphall is too depressed to really do much of anything.
  • Feeling guilty about Murray’s death, Elliott brings Mrs. Hufnagle a ham.  Mrs. Hufnagle has an allergic reaction and ends up back in the hospital.  “She thinks I tried to kill her!” Elliott says.
  • A teenager (Tim Van Patten) brings in his pregnant girlfriend, who has OD’d.  Dr. Woodley says she is required to call family services.  Myself, I started shouting, “I am da futah!” as soon as Tim “Stegman” Van Patten showed up on the screen.
  • Dr. Caldwell performs extensive plastic surgery on a disfigured young woman.  When Dr. Ehrlich says that the patient looks like she got hit with the “ugly stick,” Caldwell kicks Ehrlich off his team.
  • Nobody wants to work with Ehrlich!  Dr. Craig declines to invite Ehrlich to his 34 year anniversary party.  Cavanero agrees to take Ehrlich as her date.  “What are you doing here!?” Craig snaps as soon as he sees Ehrlich in his living room.
  • Dr. Craig’s younger brother, William (Lou Richards), also shows up.  He was invited at Ellen’s insistence, despite the fact that William and Mark haven’t spoken in over four years.  Mark feels that William has wasted his life and his potential.  But when William proves to be the life of the party, it becomes apparent that Mark is actually jealous of how likable his younger brother is.
  • In the kitchen, Mark and William have a long conversation.  William admits that he’s struggling to pay the bills.  Mark writes him a check.  For a few minutes, the brothers actually reconcile.
  • However, Mark later hears William joking about how much money surgeon’s make and he loses his temper.  In front of the entire party, he calls out William and reveals that he doesn’t have a dime to his name.
  • That night, after everyone else has left and William has gone to the guest room, Ellen tells Mark that he should apologize.  Mark agrees and says he’ll do it in the morning.
  • Later, during the night, Mark steps out of his bedroom and discovers that William has gone home.  He left behind the check, which he ripped in half.  Mark stares at the check and starts to cry.

This was another episode that did a good job balancing the serious and the humorous.  Dr. Ehrlich’s inability to say the right thing will never not be funny.  For that matter, the same can be said of Dr. Craig’s general irritation with everything.  And yet, seeing Dr. Craig break down and cry was truly heartbreaking.  Dr. Craig and Dr. Ehrlich share an inability to socialize and a habit of screwing up even the kindest of gestures.  Even when they try to do the right thing, they somehow always manage to screw it up.

I wanted to cry for all of them.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Hunter 1.1 “Hunter”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Hunter, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1991.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

Today, we start a new series.

Episode 1.1 “Hunter”

(Dir by Ron Satlof, originally aired on September 18th, 1984)

Ah, Hunter.

Hunter is one of those shows that, up unitl now, I’ve never really specifically felt the need to track down and binge but I’ve still seen a handful episodes.  Some of that is because Hunter is a mainstay on the nostalgia channels.  If you fall asleep while watching an old episode of Fantasy Island, there’s a good chance that you’re going to wake up to an episode of HunterHunter is also a mainstay on both Prime and Tubi.  Again, if you fall asleep watching your favorite Eric Roberts movie, there’s a decent chance that you’re going to wake up to an episode of Hunter.

I have to admit that every episode I’ve seen has been entertaining.  It’s the epitome of an 80s cop show, in all of its action-filled, simplistically-plotted glory.  Rick Hunter (played by former football player Fred Dryer) is a cop who gets results by doing things his way.  “His way” typically involves shooting a lot of people.  (Hunter’s catch phrase?  “Works for me.”)  Hunter’s partner is Dee Dee McCall (Stepfanie Kramer), a cop who gets results by doing things her way.  “Her way” typically involves going undercover and …. uhmm, shooting a lot of people.  And while I am certainly aware of the dangers of police overreach and I generally don’t support shooting anyone without just cause, it’s still fun to watch Hunter and McCall break every regulation in the book.  In almost every episode that I’ve seen, Hunter and McCall end up shooting so many people that the action ends up verging on self-parody.  Fortunately, both Dryer and Kramer appeared to be in on the joke.

(From what I’ve seen, I should also mention that Fred Dryer appears to have been a slightly better actor than some of the other former pro athletes who have decided to go into acting.  He may not have had a huge amount of range but he was still better than most of the basketball players who showed up on Hang Time.  If nothing else, he was better at showing emotion than OJ Simpson.)

With Highway To Heaven completed, I decided that it was time to finally take a look at Hunter.

Hunter premiered with a 90-minute made-for-television movie.  The action starts with Los Angeles Police Detective Rick Hunter crammed into a beat-up car that has definitely seen better days.  Because Hunter is the son of a mobster, he’s not totally trusted by his fellow detectives.  Because he’s a cop, he’s not totally trusted by the mob.  And because he’s a shoot-first renegade, all of his partners end up going to the hospital.  Captain Cain (Michael Cavanaugh) is trying to get him to quit the force and that means only allowing him to drive the department’s worst cars, not allowing Hunter to respond to most calls, and trying to partner him up with bowtie wearing moron, Bernie Terwilliger (James Whitmore, Jr.)

Hunter knows that LAPD regulations will allow him to pick his own partner if he can find someone willing to work with him.  The problem is that no one wants to put their life on the line.  Finally, Hunter tracks down Sgt. Dee Dee McCall, the widow of a fallen officer.  Nicknamed the “Brass Cupake” (cringe!), Dee Dee is currently working undercover as a prostitute and is trying to take down Los Angeles’s biggest pimp, King Hayes (Steven Williams).  Hunter has a proposition for her.  Since neither wants a partner and they both prefer shooting first and asking questions later, why not pretend to work together?  They’ll check in  and out at the station together but, otherwise, they’ll separate and work their own cases once they hit the streets.  McCall agrees.

Unfortunately, Captain Cain is not dumb.  He figures out exactly what they’re doing and he tells them that he will have people watching them to make sure that they are actually working together.  Luckily, McCall has just arrested King Hayes.  Hunter shows up as McCall is handcuffing Hayes and immediately sees that Hayes’s bodyguard is driving his car straight at them.

“You want this guy?” Hunter asks.

“That would be nice,” McCall replies.

Hunter, much like Dirty Harry, proceeds to fire several bullets into the car windshield, causing the car to flip over.

With King Hayes and his bodyguard now taken care of, it’s time for Hunter and McCall to investigate the murders of two blonde women who both enjoyed hanging out at country western bars.  McCall puts on a blonde wig and goes undercover at a honky tonk.  Hunter is shocked to see that she is being stalked by Dr. Bolin (Brian Dennehy), the psychiatrist who the LAPD brought in to examine all of their detectives.  As a viewer, I was not particularly surprised to discover that Dr. Bolin was the killer.  You’re not going to cast an actor like Brian Dennehy on a show like Hunter and then just have him spend the entire episode sitting in his office.  McCall and Hunter work together to stop Bolin before he kills again.

The pilot of Hunter was actually a lot of fun.  The pilot may have been violent but it still had a sense of humor.  The show understood that the sight of 6’6 Fred Dryer crammed into a dented station wagon would not only make the viewer smile but it would also go a long way towards humanizing Hunter as a character.  He may be big and cocky and quick to shoot people but he also has terrible luck when it comes to cars, police radios, and bystanders.  At one point, he even gets pepper-sprayed by Dee Dee’s neighbor.  As for Dee Dee, I liked the fact that she was capable and tough without being a stereotypical action girl.  I also appreciated that she and Hunter chose to work together.  I feared, initially, that the pilot would be full of scenes featuring Hunter whining about having to work with a woman and I appreciated that the show went the opposite direction.  From the start, Hunter respects Dee Dee as a cop and it’s made clear that she has nothing to prove to him.  If anything, Hunter has to earn her respect.

Of course, the main appeal of Hunter is that both Dryer and Kramer looked good holding a gun and yelling at people to “freeze!”  As opposed to the wishy washy police procedurals of today, the pilot of Hunter was absolutely shameless about giving the viewers what they wanted as far as bullets and car chases were concerned.

This was a good pilot.  Watching it, I could understand why the show ended up running for 8 seasons.  And, every Thursday, I’ll be reviewing Hunter.  I look forward to the action!

Retro Television Review: Decoy 1.27 “The Sound of Tears”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Decoy, which aired in Syndication in 1957 and 1958.  The show can be viewed on Tubi!

This week, Casey is haunted by the past.

Episode 1.27 “The Sound of Tears”

(Dir by Marc Daniels, originally aired on April 14th, 1958)

A wealthy young man has been gunned down in a New York park.  It falls to Casey to deliver the news to both the man’s mother (Muriel Kirland) and the man’s ex-fiancée, Wendy Jenkins (Suzanne Pleshette).  At first, Wendy is the number one suspect but, as she investigates, Casey comes to suspect that the killer was actually Susan Connor (Molly McCarthy), a family friend who had fallen in love with the victim.

This is an interesting episode, in that it reveals a bit of Casey’s past.  Usually, Casey doesn’t let her personal feelings get in the way of doing her job but, in this episode, she finds herself thinking about the day that a policewoman told her that her husband had been killed in the line of duty.  Casey has a unique understanding of the pain that the three women are feeling and Beverly Garland does a good job of showing the anguish that Casey is going through.

Unfortunately, the rest of the episode isn’t quite as good as Garland’s performance.  From the start, Susan is portrayed as being so obviously unhinged that it’s not really a surprise when she turns out to be the killer.  None of the guest cast, including a young Suzanne Pleshette, are as convincing as Beverly Garland is in the lead role.  Indeed, Charles Mendick — cast of Lt. Doyle — gives one of the worst performances that I’ve ever seen on this show.

On the plus side, this episode does feature some good location footage of 1950s New York.  The noirish black-and-white imagery nicely fits the melancholy story.  The cinematography captures the world in which Casey lives, one in which pain doesn’t just go away after a few years and the guilty are often as traumatized as those they victimize.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 3.10 “Blood on Blood”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, 1st & Ten gets serious.

Episode 3.10 “Blood on Blood”

(Dir by Bruce Seth Green, originally aired on November 27th, 1987)

The Bulls are going to the playoffs!  It’s not because they’ve had a particularly good season.  It’s just that their division rival, Denver, lost a game and that narrowly allowed the Bulls to sneak their way into the postseason.  Coach Grier yells at all the players for celebrating.  He tells them that they have nothing to be happy about.

Well, Zagreb has something to be happy about.  The Bulgarian kicker is about to get married to Anna (Valerie Landsburg) so that he can avoid being deported.  However, at the wild bachelor party that Jethro throws for him, Zagreb strips down to his underwear and dances with a stripper.  Anna happens to show up and she calls off the wedding.  The next day, Jill tells Zagreb that the State Department is no longer trying to deport him.  It turns out that Zagreb’s father was not a communist official but instead a double agent!  (Zagreb says that he read the Communist Manifesto a hundred times for nothing.)  Zagreb no longer has to get married to stay in the country.  Except, now, Zagreb wants to get married….

Meanwhile, Billy Cooper gets his brother, Michael (Linden Ashby), a job as an assistant equipment manager.  Mike has just gotten out of prison.  He was serving time for armed robbery.  When things turn up missing in the locker room, Mike is the number one suspect.  TD Parker (played by OJ Simpson) fires him.  Just imagine getting accused and then fired by OJ Simpson!  Mike is not happy.

Later, Bubba catches another equipment manager stealing from the locker room.  Realizing that Mike was innocent, TD and Billy drive out to the liquor store where Mike is now working.  They hire Mike back.  Yay!  I love it when people get a second chance.  We’d have a lot less crime in this country if people were willing to take a chance on folks like Mike, who made a mistake but who sincerely want to turn their lives around.  Good for TD!  Good for Billy!  Good for America….

Of course, as soon as TD and Billy leave, two bikers rob the liquor store and shoot Mike dead.

Wow, this was a dark episode.  I appreciated the fact that the show attempted to take a serious look at the struggle that someone like Mike would face upon reentering society.  That said, the liquor store shooting happened so abruptly that it felt almost like a parody of a melodrama.  Much like the player dying of steroid abuse earlier in the season, this was the type of big dramatic moment that 1st & Ten didn’t really have the gravitas to pull off.

Next week, the Bulls continue to try to make it to the Championship for the third year in a row!

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 7.15 “How Do I Love Thee?/No More Alimony/Authoress! Authoress!”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, the Love Boat takes a dramatic turn.

Episode 7.15 “How Do I Love Thee?/No More Alimony/Authoress! Authoress!”

(Dir by Kim Friedman, originally aired on January 7th, 1984)

As usual, this week’s episode features three stories.  Two of them are very silly.

Betty White and Carol Channing play two Broadway veterans who are hoping to interest publisher Cesar Romero in Betty’s autobiography.  Cesar is more interested in Carol.  Betty and Carol collaborate on a book that is full of sordid lies.  Cesar says he’ll publish it because “the hicks in the South” will love it.  Carol announces that she is a hick from the South and promptly rips the manuscript in half.  Good for her!

Alan Thicke wants his ex-wife, Michelle Phillips, to marry Fred Willard so that he’ll no longer have to pay alimony.  However, when Alan discovers that Fred is a womanizer, Alan reconsiders his plans.

These two stories feel very familiar.  They’re the type of stories that we’ve seen on many episodes of The Love Boat.  They’re saved a bit because of the comedic skills of Fred Willard and Betty White but, in the end, they’re definitely on the silly side of the cruise.

But then you get the third story, which is not silly at all.  Laura (Rue McClanahan) boards the ship with her husband, George (Dick Van Patten).  Laura is an old friend of Captain Stubing’s and he’s alarmed when he sees that Laura has a black eye.  Laura says she simply walked into a door.  George laughs and says that Laura is a klutz.

Actually, Laura is being abused by her husband.  George’s business is failing.  George is jealous of Captain Stubing.  George hits Laura in their cabin and it’s a shocking moment because 1) this is The Love Boat and 2) it actually looks like that Van Patten may have accidentally hit McClanahan for real.  (Van Patten briefly breaks character, looking shocked, before quickly turning back into the angry George.)  Stubing realizes what’s happening and confronts George.  By the end of the episode, George is promising to “get some help” but it’s significant that Laura doesn’t leave the ship with him.  One gets the feeling that she’s heard that promise before.

At first, it seems strange to have such an serious storyline playing out in-between scenes of Carol Channing and Betty White singing and Fred Willard leering at every woman on the boat but it actually works surprisingly well.  The show makes an important point.  Even on a fun cruise, abuse can happen.  Abuse doesn’t take a vacation.  And abusers can be the people you least suspect, like perennial nice guy Dick Van Patten.  I have a lot of respect for this episode for dealing with a serious subject and doing it well.

This was an important cruise.

 

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 3.21 “Till Death Do Us Part”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, a loved one dies.

Episode 3.21 “Till Death Do Us Part”

(Dir by Michael Levine, originally aired on April 12th, 1998)

When two robbers invade a high-end clothing store and shoot a security guard, they also accidentally shoot and kill Linda, Victor’s fiancée.  In fact, Linda was trying on a wedding dress when she was shot.  She was accompanied by Chris.  In typical Pacific Blue style, even though Victor is the one who has just lost his fiancée, Chris also gets a chance to tell everyone that it’s also something that she’ll never recover from because she was the one who was actually there when it happened.  Chris is so upset that she initially refuses to even change her clothes, even though they’ve been splattered with Linda’s blood.  The show seems to think that this makes Chris into a strong character.  Personally, I think it makes her someone who is so self-centered that she even has to make the death of someone else’s fiancée all about her.  I can only imagine how Victor feels seeing Linda’s blood all over Chris’s shirt.

As for Victor, he goes on a rampage, tearing up Santa Monica until he finds the man who shot Linda.  Victor ignores regulations.  He breaks rules.  He nearly shoots the killer in a parking lot and his partner Cory promises to back him up if he pulls the trigger.  In the end, Victor is not a cold-blooded murderer.  He allows the killer to be arrested.  He tells the killer that he can’t wait to witness his execution.  (Good luck, Victor.  You’re in California!)  But, as the episode ends, it’s mentioned that Internal Affairs is going to want his badge.

(Apparently, that will be dealt with in next week’s episode, which is also the season three finale.)

Watching this episode, I can found myself asking myself if all the other cops in Santa Monica have been fired.  I didn’t see anyone other than the bicycle cops investigating the robberies or the shootings.  I didn’t see anyone from Homicide looking into Linda’s murder.  Instead, the entire episode was full of people trying to look tough while wearing bicycle shorts.

It just can’t be done!

Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell: The Class 1.11 “Weasel Love”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00.  The show is currently on Prime.

This week, Weasel’s found love again.  Or has he?

Episode 1.11 “Weasel Love”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 20th, 1993)

Weasel’s online girlfriend, Natalie (Stephanie Dicker), moves to California and enrolls at Bayside.  At first, she looks and acts just like Tori Spelling during Tori’s time on the original Saved By The Bell.  However, Megan, Vicki, and Lindsay give her a makeover that …. actually, makes her look significantly worse.  But everyone at Bayside insists that it makes her look better so Weasel starts to feel insecure.  Tommy D, Scott, and Mr. Belding (really?) give Weasel a makeover to team him how to be cool.  That coolness goes to Weasel’s head and soon, he and Natalie aren’t speaking.

Uh-oh!  Natalie and Weasel are both in the school band!  Natalie plays piano.  Weasel plays saxophone.  (Needless to say, we never actually see Natalie’s hands when she’s playing piano.)  How is the band going to win that trip to New York if Natalie and Weasel aren’t capable of performing a duet together?

Well, maybe Tommy can hop on the computer and send Natalie a message “from Weasel” apologizing.  Natalie is touched but later, Weasel reveals that he didn’t write the message.  But Weasel and Natalie still talk through their differences and the band wins that New York trip!

As for this episode’s B-plot, Tommy D and Scott trick two of the nerd characters into leaving the band so that they can replace them.  As I watched Scott and Tommy trick the nerds into thinking that they were losing their hearing, it occurred to me that it takes a lot of charisma to make a schemer likable.  Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Mario Lopez had that charisma, which is why the first Saved By The Bell worked despite Zack being a sociopath.  Robert Sutherland Telfer and Jonathan Angel on the other hand….

(Actually, in all honesty, Jonathan Angel was likable as Tommy.  He had the goofy dumb guy thing down.  Telfer, however, didn’t have Gosselaar’s cocky charm.  As a result, Scott usually comes across as being more desperate than confident.)

Anyway, this was another dumb episode.  There’s no consistency when it comes to how characters like Weasel are portrayed so it’s really had to care about their lives one way or another.  This episode, Weasel got a girlfriend.  Even though I haven’t seen the remaining season one episodes yet, I can guarantee that she will never be mentioned again.

Finally, the band sounded terrible.  Leave them in New York.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 5.15 “Bright Flashes”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, it’s lasers and horses in Los Angeles!

Episode 5.15 “Bright Flashes”

(Dir by Leslie H. Martinson, originally aired on January 17th, 1982)

Two dorky university science students — Scotty (Mark L. Taylor) and Richard (Jerry Houser) — have invented a laser that they use to temporarily blind people before robbing them.  They blind Ponch in the middle of a race.  They blind a group of people in front of a bank.  The only person they don’t blind is old cowboy actor Wayne Cato (George Lindsay) but, when Wayne doesn’t chase after them, everyone except for Baker treats him like he’s a coward.

Uhmm, excuse me …. the man is in his sixties!  It’s not his responsibility to go chasing after every crook in Los Angeles.  Maybe the Highway Patrol should do their job!

Wayne feels so guilty that he does chase the robber when they show up to rob yet another bank that he’s standing in front of.  Baker joins in and gets to live his fantasy of ditching his motorcycle for a horse.

This episode was a rare case of Baker getting to the be the main character even though Erik Estrada was healthy and present as Ponch.  It was a bit of a silly episode.  Why everyone got so angry with Wayne Cato was never really explained.  (What was a 60-something retired cowboy to do?)  The funniest thing was the ultra cheap laser special effects, none of which seemed to land anywhere near anyone’s eyes.

Again, it was a silly episode.  But at least Baker got to ride a horse.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 5.21 “Too Much, Too Late”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, Miami Vice comes to a close.

Episode 5.21 “Too Much, Too Late”

(Dir by Richard Compton, originally aired on January 25th, 1990)

Tough NYPD detective Valerie Gordon (Pam Grier) returns to Miami after she learns that her friend Yvonne (CCH Pounder) has become addicted to crack cocaine and has been using her teenage daughter, Lynette (Malinda Williams), to pay her dealer, Swayne (John Toles-Bey).  Returning to Miami also allows Valerie to meet up with her former lover, Tubbs.  Tubbs is happy to see her again and even starts to think about marriage.  When Yvonne turns up dead, Valerie insists that Swayne killed her.  However, Crockett isn’t so sure.  Eventually, it turns out that Lynette murdered her own mother and that Valerie has been trying to frame Swayne for the crime.  Both Swayne and Lynette are arrested.  Valerie returns to New York where, she tells Tubbs, she is going to turn in her badge and retire from the police force.

Meanwhile, Switek tries to resist the temptation to start gambling again.  He even goes to meetings of Gamblers Anonymous but, when he’s stuck alone in his apartment and dealing with the guilt that he still feels over Zito’s death, Switek finds himself overwhelmed.  Soon, he is again placing bets.

This was not intended to be the final episode of Miami Vice.  Switek giving into his gambling addiction and Tubbs growing increasingly burned out were all plot points that were obviously designed to lead straight into Freefall.  Even Tubbs’s decision to return to New York makes a lot more sense once we know that Valerie is there.  However, NBC did not air this episode during the show’s original run because of its subject matter.  Yvonne selling her daughter for crack was considered to be too controversial.  As such, it didn’t air until the show went into syndication.  That’s a shame.  This was a strong episode, one that featured the melancholy atmosphere that made Miami Vice so memorable in the first place.

Well, that’s it for Miami Vice.  It’s a show that started out strong.  The first two seasons were consistently outstanding.  The third season was entertaining, even if it was obvious that the show was starting to run on autopilot.  The fourth season is where the show lost itself.  As for the fifth season, it had its flaws but it was a definite improvement over the fourth season.  While it was obvious that Don Johnson was eager to move on, the fifth season still provided enough good episodes that the show managed to redeem itself before it finally ended.

I’m going to miss Miami Vice.  Even at its worse, it had style to burn.

(I should mention that the whole reason I started reviewing Miami Vice back in 2023 was because I assumed Ron DeSantis would be elected President in 2024 and that people would naturally be curious about a show set in Florida.  Whoops.)

Next week, something new will premiere in this time slot.  What will it be?  I’ll let you know as soon as I know.  For now, let’s just take a moment to remember Crockett, Tubbs, and Elvis.