Lisa Marie Reviews An Oscar Nominee: Marty Supreme (dir by Josh Safdie)


Leave it to Josh Safdie to make an anxiety-ridden film about ping pong.

That’s not a complaint, by the way.  Both with his brother Benny and working solo on this film, Josh Safdie has proven himself to be a master at making anxiety compelling.  Much more so than Benny’s 20205 offering, The Smashing Machine, Josh’s Marty Supreme keeps you off-balance.  Marty Supreme may be set in the 50s but it’s deliberately shot in the gritty style of 70s-era Scorese and Lumet.  Meanwhile, the background music is largely made up of classic songs from the 80s.  Timothee Chalamet may play the title role of Marty Mauser, a shoe salesman who also happens to be a ping pong champion.  And the film may also feature recognizable actors like Odessa A’Zion, Gwyneth Paltrow, Fran Drescher, and Emory Cohen (remember him?).   But the majority of the cast is made up of people best-known for not being actors.  Shark Tank co-host and aspiring lead of Canada Kevin O’Leary plays Paltrow’s husband and Marty’s occasional sponsor.  Director Abel Ferrara plays a gangster who is searching for his dog.  Penn Jillette plays a New Jersey farmer who shoots first and asks questions later.  David Mamet, Isaac Mizrahi, early internet sensation Ted Williams, former New York mayoral candidateJ ohn Catsimatidis, rapper Tyler The Creator, and performance artist Sandra Bernhard all show up in small roles, creating a very New York atmosphere that somehow feels both familiar and artificial.  Watching the movie is like living the tourist’s dream of traveling to New York, seeing your favorite Manhattan celebrities hanging out in Brooklyn, and then having them curse you out for owing them money.

As is to be expected from a Safdie film, Marty Mauser is not always a sympathetic protagonist.  He’s been having an affair with the married Rachel (Odessa A’Zion) but, even after he finds out that Rachel is pregnant, that doesn’t stop him from having a purely sexual relationship with former actress Kay Stone (Gwyneth Paltrow), the wife of businessman Milton Rockwell (Kevin O’Leary).  Marty thinks that he’s the world’s best ping pong player, which is why he has a hard time accepting being humiliated at the hands of Japan’s champion, Endo (Koto Kawaguchi).  Marty’s efforts to return to Japan for a rematch lead to an at times dizzying array of complications.  Marty is the type who will steal his lover’s necklace just to return it and apologize after learning that it was only worth two bucks because it was costume jewelry.  Fortunately, Marty is played by Timothee Chalamet, who gives such an energetic and charismatic performance that it’s hard not to be charmed by the character even while his actions might upset, annoy, or even offend you.  The film never claims that Marty is the best ping pong player in the world.  Only Marty claims that.  Instead, the film shows just how unshakeable Marty’s belief in himself is.  It’s hard not to like someone who refuses to accept defeat.

In many ways, Marty is a quintessential American figure.  He believes in himself and he’s not going to apologize for it.  Both the character and the film celebrate the individualism that make America unique.  That 50s setting really does make sense.  Marty truly is the post-war American, dedicated and unapologetic.  And, in that context, the film’s “stunt” casting, for lack of a better description, makes sense as well.  David Mamet, Kevin O’Leary, Penn Jillette, Abel Ferrara, John Catsimatidis, and so many of the other familiar faces that float through Marty Supreme: they’re all people who have gone their own way, even at the risk of alienating the establishment.

Marty Supreme was nominated for 9 Oscars but failed to win any of them.  Indeed, the amount of negative stories that were breathlessly reported about the film’s director and lead actor after the nominations were announced indicates that there was an organized whisper campaign against the film.  (In a sad sign of the time, there was a good deal of negative backlash online from the dishrag brigade, who were upset that the film’s lead character was Jewish.)  Despite being the best of the nominated films, Marty Supreme lost to One Battle After Another.

Lisa Marie’s Early Oscar Predictions For May


These predictions are still too early to really be taken seriously.  The year is getting off to a slow start as far as the Oscars are concerned.  That said, here are my predictions for May!

Check out my predictions for March and April!

Best Picture

The Adventures of Cliff Booth

Digger

Dune Part Three

Fatherland

Fjord

I Play Rocky

Primetime

Project Hail Mary

The Social Reckoning

Wild Horse Nine

Best Director

David Fincher for The Adventures of Cliff Booth

Phil Lord and Christopher Miller for Project Hail Mary

Cristian Mungiu for Fjord

Pawel Pawlikowski for Fatherland

Denis Villeneuve for Dune: Part Three

Best Actor

Tom Cruise in Digger

Rami Malek in The Man I Love

John Malkovich in Wild Hose Nine

Robert Pattinson in Primetime

Dominic Sessa in Tony

Best Actress

Daisy Edgar-Jones in Sense and Sensibility

Sandra Huller in Fatherland

Mikey Madison in The Social Reckoning

Julianne Moore in No One Cares

Renate Reinsve in Fjord

Best Supporting Actor

Steve Buscemi in Wild Horse 9

Colman Domingo in Michael

Matt Dillon in I Play Rocky

John Goodman in Digger

Jeremy Strong in The Social Reckoning

Best Supporting Actress

Sandra Huller in Project Hail Mary

Scarlett Johansson in Paper Tiger

Tao Okamoto in All Of A Sudden

Parker Posey in Wild Horse Nine

AnnaSophia Robb in I Play Rocky

Christopher Nolan takes us to Ancient Greece in The Odyssey Trailer!


I grew up on stuff like Jason and the Argonauts, Clash of the Titans and Jim Henson’s The Storyteller. Part of me looks at Christopher Nolan’s new Trailer for The Odyssey and is hopeful for crazy Harryhausen-like CGI and what his take may be on the Greek Gods. I’m also wondering if it’ll just focus on the humans and will give us something practical like Wolfgang Petersen’s Troy. Either way, The Odyssey will look amazing on the IMAX, I’m sure. The trailer keeps things simple, which is good.

This film hasn’t been on my radar much, but looking at the cast list, the line up is pretty nice. Nolan’s called a few friends back with Anne Hathaway (The Dark Knight Rises & The Devil Wears Prada 2), Elliot Page (Inception & Close to You) and Benny Safdie (Oppenheimer & The Smashing Machine). They are joined by Robert Pattinson (The Batman), Jon Bernthal (The Accountant 2), Lupita Nyong’o (A Quiet Place: Day One), Charlize Theron (Atomic Blonde), Mia Goth (Frankenstein) and Zendaya & Tom Holland (Spider-Man: No Way Home).

The Odyssey releases in theatres next Summer.

The Batman (dir. by Matt Reeves)


I slept on it before writing this, to let the euphoria pass.

Matt Reeves’ The Batman surprised me in a number of ways, some of which can’t be mentioned without throwing spoilers. I’ll perhaps write a second piece on this, but for now, understand that this film has effectively pushed The Dark Knight to the side as my favorite live-action Batman film (The Lego Batman Movie stands on a pedestal all it’s own above all the rest). My favorite Batman stories are the detective tales. Gotham by Gaslight. The Long Halloween. Hush.

On film, the Caped Crusader has moments of investigation, but they often took a backseat either to the action or the resolution came as quickly as a Batcomputer search. For me, The Batman had closer ties to films like David Fincher’s Seven, Alan J. Pakula’s Klute, Bruce Malmuth’s Nighthawks, and even Shane Black’s The Nice Guys to some degree. It does all this legwork while finding a way to avoid giving us the same clip of the Monarch Shooting of the Waynes. That alone is worth it for me. This is Batman. After more than 9 films, you’d be hard pressed to find anyone on the planet younger than maybe six who doesn’t know how he got that way.

Living in NYC, I can relate to Gotham City. On the surface, it’s beautiful. For those who can afford it, there are tons of amenities available to its citizens. Peel back that layer, though, and you’ll always have Crime in a city holding 9 million people. It’s a constant as rain. Gotham City is on the verge of breakdown. Looking at the torn poster filled streets and I was reminded of a cross between Walter Hill’s Streets of Fire and Alex Proyas’ The Crow .and the way most of Manhattan looks now with it’s closed down stores. The city almost serves as a character itself in The Batman. It’s a throwback to some of the classic black and white detective movies my parents grew up on like 1947’s Kiss of Death. For all his gadgets and resources, there’s an argument suggesting the Batman can never really save his beloved city, though we love his efforts.

“Forget it, Bruce. It’s Gotham.” one might as well say.

Visually, the movie is a little dark, but that makes sense given the tone of the film. Cinematographer Greig Fraser (Dune, Zero Dark Thirty) is somewhat new to me, but I’m liking his work, which felt a little like Janusz Kaminski’s Lost Souls. It wasn’t dark to the point where I couldn’t make out elements (and I was sitting in the front row, far left side in my theatre), I’ll say that much. I’ll keep an eye on him in the future.

The Batman takes place in our hero’s second to third year, according to an early narration (much like Blade Runner). Batman has a good rapport with Lt. James Gordon (Jeffrey Wright, No Time to Die) and his butler, Alfred (Andy Serkis, reuniting with Reeves since Dawn of the Planet of the Apes), for the most part, there are some results. Criminals flee when the bat symbol shines in the night sky, because no one really knows where The Dark Knight will strike. A new murder brings both Gordon and the Batman into play, as his opponent leaves various riddles for them to solve. The mystery brings Batman into various circles, including those of Selina Kyle (Zoe Kravitz, Kimi), crime boss Carmine Falcone (John Turturro, The Big Lebowski) and Oz (Colin Farrell, The Gentlemen). They all bring in great performances, including Peter Sarsgaard (Green Lantern), but it’s Paul Dano (Ruby Sparks, There Will Be Blood) who really runs away with things as The Riddler. I’ve never considered The Riddler to be a creepy villain, but this was quite dark, even for DC’s standards. I can’t imagine how it would have turned out if this was a Rated R film. I’m really curious to know.

Lt. James Gordon (Jeffrey Wright) and The Batman (Robert Pattinson) do some Detective work in Matt Reeves’ The Batman

Bruce Wayne has never been an easy character to handle on screen.

There are whole books written on the Psychology of the Batman. Here you have an individual who witnessed his parents being murdered as a kid and grows up in a near empty mansion with butlers and maids. The individual decides to dedicate his life (and vast resources) to studying criminal investigation techniques, martial arts and even Ninjitsu for a singular focus: To rid Gotham City of Crime. Add to this the concept of instilling fear in one’s enemies, and dressing up like a Bat to pummel thugs with fists and gadgets just adds to Wayne’s madness. Pattinson honed in on this and turns Bruce Wayne into a pretty isolated and brooding individual. For someone with nearly unlimited resources, he doesn’t seem happy with any of it at all. At least Keaton pretended to party and Clooney’s Wayne truly did party. Bale’s Wayne let Fox focus on research and development. Hell, even Affleck’s Wayne recognized he was rich and flaunted it like a superpower all its own. Pattinson’s Batman is lean and really looks like the kind of guy you might find stepping out of the shadows just past Wall Street late at night. No offense to Affleck’s Batman, who for some is the pinnacle of what the character should be, but I’ve always associated that look with the older, fresh out of retirement Batman of Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns.

Together, Pattinson and Kravitz’ chemistry was really nice on screen. I’ll admit, I enjoyed the romance between the two. Both characters accept tha they’re Creatures of the Night, and there’s this sweet give and take between the two as they nudge each other. Selina doesn’t have to do crime, and Batman doesn’t have to be the spirit of Vengeance, but they’re caught up in what works best for them. I enjoyed that aspect.

At first listen (about a week ago), I thought Michael Giacchino’s theme needed something outside of the four note motif it had. Hearing the music with the movie is a different beast, and I have to say, it works really well here. In some places, it’s as minimalistic as Hans Zimmer’s Nolan scores.

Now, a little Devil’s Advocate. The main problem I had with The Batman was the same I had with Spider-Man: No Way Home. I understand DC & Warner Bros. want to draw people into the theatre, but in this age where every element of a trailer is scanned and studied, I’d argue that 40% of the action you watched on screen were already somewhat spoiled by the trailer (or trailers, if you watched every one the Warners released). I’m not saying one should refrain from watching trailers – I only watched the teaser and the main trailer – but I would have liked if they held some scenes back. One might also argue The Batman was lighter on action than the other films, but it’s the detective work and the character performances that make up for it.

There’s also a lot of rain. Almost too much. Remember the sequence in Jurassic Park with the first appearance of the T-Rex? I would say that most of The Batman is set under somewhat similar conditions. It felt like it either just rained, was about to, or you were in the middle of a downpour. Then again, so did The Crow. Perhaps that’s just a nitpick on my part.

Also, clocking in at 2 hours and 56 minutes, it’s a long film. You might not really notice it, but I’d go so far to say that the time didn’t feel wasted. I noticed 3 or 4 people who left for the restroom in my showing, if that’s any indication.

Overall, The Batman was a wonderful surprise from the DC side of things, and I’m liking the direction it’s going. It might not be a completely connected universe like Marvel’s lineup, but they’re proving they can still weave some amazing stories with the characters they have.

DCFanDome presents the 2nd Trailer for The Batman!


On the DCFanDome today, Matt Reeves, Robert Pattinson and Zoe Kravitz shared the 2nd Trailer for The Batman, which is looking pretty good!

We’ll let the visuals and Michael Giacchino’s score do the talking. The Batman releases in cinemas March 4, 2022.

Enjoy!

Here’s The Trailer For The Batman!


This weekend, several trailers were dropped for the upcoming installments in the DC Extended universe.  People on twitter certainly were excited, though I have to admit that, with the exception of Wonder Woman, I’ve never cared much about the DC films.

Then again, that could change.  To be honest, I haven’t been that enthusiastic for the new MCU films.  I’m even kind of dreading Black Widow because the way the character was killed off in Infinity War still bothers me.  Speaking of which, with the exception of killing off Natasha, I loved Infinity War but I have to admit that it kind of felt almost like to perfect an ending for the entire MCU.  All the films that follow will be in its shadow.  Meanwhile, the DC films are still finding themselves and that could potentially be interesting to watch.  Or not.  We all remember Man of Steel.

Then again — and yes, I know, I’m indecisive — it’s hard for me to get excited for yet another Batman film.  “This Batman is dark and serious!”  Oh, you mean as opposed to all the other recent Batman films?  Y’know why people loved LEGO Batman?  Because it was willing to poke fun at itself and the character.

Anyway, here’s the trailer for The Batman, with Robert Pattinson in the lead role.  I think Robert Pattinson is an excellent actor who has more than proven that he deserves to be known for more than just playing Edward Cullen.  For the record, though this is a DC film, it’s apparently not considered to be a part of the DCEU.  So, I guess maybe it’s taking place in the same cinematic universe as Joker.

(Seriously, it’s kind of hard to keep all these universes straight….)

Here Are The 2019 Nominations of the Detroit Film Critics Society!


Earlier on Friday, the Detroit Film Critics Society released their nominations for the best of 2019!

Now, back in 2018, the DFCS honored some great films that were overlooked by the Academy, films like Eighth Grade, A Quiet Place, and First Reformed.  I mean, I really, really loved the 2018 DFCS awards.  And you know what?  I’m pretty happy with what they came up with for 2019 as well!  I especially like the nomination for Anna Paquin in The Irishman.  With all the overblown controversy about how many lines she spoke in the film, it is often overlooked that she gave a great performance and, with just the power of her withering glare, pretty much transformed Peggy into the conscience of the film.

Here are the DFCS nominees for the best of 2019!  The winners will be announced on December 9th!

BEST PICTURE
The Irishman
Jojo Rabbit
Marriage Story
Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood
Parasite

BEST DIRECTOR
Noah Baumbach – Marriage Story
Bong Joon-ho – Parasite
Martin Scorsese – The Irishman
Quentin Tarantino – Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood
Taika Waititi – Jojo Rabbit

BEST ACTRESS
Scarlett Johansson – Marriage Story
Julianne Moore – Gloria Bell
Lupita Nyong’o – Us
Charlize Theron – Bombshell
Renee Zellweger – Judy

BEST ACTOR
Robert De Niro – The Irishman
Adam Driver – Marriage Story
Robert Pattinson – The Lighthouse
Joaquin Phoenix – Joker
Adam Sandler – Uncut Gems

SUPPORTING ACTOR
Willem Dafoe – The Lighthouse
Tom Hanks – A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood
Joe Pesci – The Irishman
Brad Pitt – Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood
Sam Rockwell – Richard Jewell
Wesley Snipes – Dolemite Is My Name

SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Kathy Bates – Richard Jewell
Laura Dern – Marriage Story
Scarlett Johansson – Jojo Rabbit
Anna Paquin – The Irishman
Florence Pugh – Little Women

BEST SCREENPLAY
The Irishman
The Lighthouse
Marriage Story
Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood
Parasite

BEST ANIMATED FILM
Frozen II
How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World
I Lost My Body
Klaus
Toy Story 4

BEST USE OF MUSIC
1917
Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood
Rocketman
Uncut Gems
Wild Rose

BEST ENSEMBLE
Dolemite Is My Name
The Farewell
The Irishman
Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood
Parasite

BEST DOCUMENTARY
Amazing Grace
Apollo 11
Horror Noire: A History of Black Horror
Knocking Down the House
Rolling Thunder Review: A Bob Dylan Story by Martin Scorsese

BREAKTHROUGH
Ana de Armas – actress (Knives Out, The Informer, Yesterday)
Jessie Buckley – actress (Wild Rose, Judy)
Kaitlyn Dever – actress (Booksmart, Them That Follow)
Aisling Franciosi – actress (The Nightingale)
Paul Walter Hauser – actor (Richard Jewell)
Florence Pugh – actress (Fighting with My Family, Midsommar, Little Women)
Lulu Wang – director (The Farewell)
Olivia Wilde – director (Booksmart)

Here Are The 2019 Independent Spirit Award Nominees!


Here are the 2019 Indie Spirit Award nominations!  These nominations are meant to honor the best independent films of 2019 and their announcement marks the official beginning of awards season (at least as far as this sight is concerned!)  I hate to say it but I still need to see quite a few of the films nominated below so, for now, I’ll hold off on any editorial commentary.

For those looking for some sort of evidence of how the Oscar nominations can go, the Independent Spirit Awards can be an iffy precursor, just because several of the expensive, major studio contenders aren’t eligible to nominated.  (For instance, neither The Irishman nor Once Upon A Time In Hollywood were eligible.)  That said, for the record, the two biggest Spirit nominees are The Lighthouse and Uncut Gems.  Waves and The Farewell, which have been the center of considerable Oscar speculation, did not do as strongly in the nominations as many people apparently expected.  Make of that what you will!

Here are the nominees!

Best Supporting Female

  • Jennifer Lopez – HUSTLERS
  • Taylor Russell – WAVES
  • Zhao Shuzhen – THE FAREWELL
  • Lauren “Lolo” Spencer – GIVE ME LIBERTY
  • Octavia Spencer – LUCE
  • Best Supporting Male
  • Willem Dafoe – THE LIGHTHOUSE
  • Noah Jupe – HONEY BOY
  • Shia Labeouf – HONEY BOY
  • Jonathan Majors – THE LAST BLACK MAN IN SAN FRANCISCO
  • Wendell Pierce – BURNING CANE

Best Screenplay

  • Noah Baumbach – MARRIAGE STORY
  • Jason Begue, Shawn Snyder – TO DUST
  • Ronald Bronstein, Benny Safdie, Josh Safdie – UNCUT GEMS
  • Chinonye Chukwu – CLEMENCY
  • Tarell Alvin Mccraney – HIGH FLYING BIRD

Best First Screenplay

  • Fredrica Bailey, Stefon Bristol – SEE YOU YESTERDAY
  • Hannah Bos, Paul Thureen – DRIVEWAYS
  • Bridget Savage Cole, Danielle Krudy – BLOW THE MAN DOWN
  • Jocelyn Deboer, Dawn Luebbe – GREENER GRASS
  • James Montague, Craig W. Sanger – THE VAST OF NIGHT

Best Cinematography

  • Todd Banhazl – HUSTLERS
  • Jarin Blaschke – THE LIGHTHOUSE
  • Natasha Braier – HONEY BOY
  • Chananun Chotrungroj – THE THIRD WIFE
  • Pawel Pogorzelski – MIDSOMMAR

Best Editing

  • Julie Béziau – THE THIRD WIFE
  • Ronald Bronstein, Benny Safdie – UNCUT GEMS
  • Tyler L. Cook – SWORD OF TRUST
  • Louise Ford – THE LIGHTHOUSE
  • Kirill Mikhanovsky – GIVE ME LIBERTY

Best International Film

  • INVISIBLE LIFE, Brazil
  • LES MISERABLES, France
  • PARASITE, South Korea
  • PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE, France
  • RETABLO, Peru
  • THE SOUVENIR, United Kingdom

Best Documentary (Award given to the director and producer)

  • AMERICAN FACTORY
  • APOLLO 11
  • FOR SAMA
  • HONEYLAND
  • ISLAND OF THE HUNGRY GHOSTS

The John Cassavetes Award is presented to the best feature made for under $500,000 and is given to the writer, director, and producer. 2020 #SpiritAwards Nominees are:

  • BURNING CANE
  • COLEWELL
  • GIVE ME LIBERTY
  • PREMATURE
  • WILD NIGHTS WITH EMILY

Best Female Lead

  • Karen Allen – COLEWELL
  • Hong Chau – DRIVEWAYS
  • Elisabeth Moss – HER SMELL
  • Mary Kay Place – DIANE
  • Alfre Woodard – CLEMENCY
  • Renée Zellweger – JUDY

Best Male Lead 

  • Chris Galust – GIVE ME LIBERTY
  • Kelvin Harrison  Jr., – LUCE
  • Robert Pattinson – THE LIGHTHOUSE
  • Adam Sandler – UNCUT GEMS
  • Matthias Schoenaerts – THE MUSTANG

Best First Feature (Award given to the director and producer)

  • BOOKSMART
  • THE CLIMB
  • DIANE
  • THE LAST BLACK MAN IN SAN FRANCISCO
  • THE MUSTANG
  • SEE YOU YESTERDAY

Best Feature [award given to the producer(s)]

  • A HIDDEN LIFE
  • CLEMENCY
  • THE FAREWELL
  • MARRIAGE STORY
  • UNCUT GEMS

Best Director

  • Robert Eggers – THE LIGHTHOUSE
  • Alma Har’el – HONEY BOY
  • Julius Onah – LUCE
  • Benny Safdie, Josh Safdie – UNCUT GEMS
  • Lorene Scafaria – HUSTLERS

The Robert Altman Award is given to the ensemble cast, director & casting director of one film: MARRIAGE STORY – Noah Baumbach, Douglas Aibel, Francine Maisler, Alan Alda, Laura Dern, Adam Driver, Julie Hagerty, Scarlett Johansson, Ray Liotta, Azhy Robertson, Merritt Wever

The Truer Than Fiction Award, in its 25th year, is for emerging directors of non-fiction features and includes an unrestricted grant. Finalists:
Khalik Allah – BLACK MOTHER
Davy Rothbart – 17 BLOCKS
Nadia Shihab – JADDOLAND
Erick Stoll & Chase Whiteside – AMÉRICA

The Producers Award, now in its 23rd year, honors emerging producers who demonstrate creativity, tenacity and vision, despite highly limited resources. The award includes an unrestricted grant. These are the finalists:
Mollye Asher
Krista Parris
Ryan Zacarias

The Someone To Watch Award, in its 26th year, recognizes a talented filmmaker of singular vision and includes an unrestricted grant. The finalists are:
Rashaad Ernesto Green – PREMATURE
Ash Mayfair – THE THIRD WIFE
Joe Talbot – THE LAST BLACK MAN IN SAN FRANCISCO

The Bonnie Award will recognize a mid-career female director with a $50,000 unrestricted grant. The 2020 Film Independent #SpiritAwards Bonnie Award finalists are:
MarielleHeller
KellyReichardt
LuluWang

Here’s The Enigmatic First Trailer For Christopher Nolan’s Next Film, Tenet!


Out of nowhere tonight, we suddenly got the first trailer for Christopher Nolan’s next film.  Tenet is a project that has been shrouded in secrecy.  All we know for sure is that it’s an espionage epic of some sort and that it stars John David Washington and Robert Pattinson.

And now, we have a trailer, which features Washington doing …. stuff.  It’s hard to say what he’s doing, of course.  It’s an enigmatic teaser, which shouldn’t come as a surprise since this is a Nolan production.

Great music, though.

Here’s the trailer:

 

Film Review: The King (dir by David Michod)


Imagine a version of Shakespeare’s Henry V where Prince Hal is a lot less regal but a lot more whiny.  Also imagine a version where Falstaff is never publicly rejected by Henry but instead becomes one of his leading generals.  Furthermore, imagine that Robert Pattinson shows ups and does his best imitation of the obnoxious Frenchmen from Monty Python and The Holy Grail.  Also, finally, imagine a film that’s based on three of Shakespeare’s most popular plays but which does’t include any lines from those plays.  Imagine all of that and you’ve got The King.

Yes, The King is an odd film indeed.  It’s also a very long film.  You might expect that from a film based on three Shakespearean plays but, then again, since the film actually doesn’t feature any of Shakespeare’s celebrated language, you have to kind of wonder if it can actually claim to be a Shakespearean adaptation.  For instance, if I made a film about a sullen prince named Hamlet but totally leave out “To be or not to be” or the part where he sees his father’s ghost, am I truly adapting Shakespeare or am I just making a film about a guy named Hamlet?  Interestingly enough, while The King isn’t faithful to Shakespeare, it’s also not faithful to actual historical records.  It’s not Shakespeare and, despite using the name of actual kings and nobles from the 15th Century, it’s not really historical.  It could just as easily be about King Kevin and his struggle to lead the Land of Homily to victory over Possum Kingdom.  It’s hard to really understand what the point of this film is.

Timothee Chalamet plays Prince Hal, who will eventually become King Henry V.  Considering just how acclaimed Chalamet’s previous work has been (including receiving an Oscar nomination for Call Me By Your Name and probably coming close to getting a second one for Beautiful Boy as well), it’s a bit strange just how dull Chalamet is in this film.  As played by Chalamet, the future King of England is alternatively petulant and whiny.  He’s not happy about becoming king.  He’s even less happy about having to behead those who have been accused of conspiring against him.  He hopes to avoid war, even after the King of France taunts him by giving him a ball as an coronation present.  Chalamet wanders through the film with an eternally glum expression on his face.  When he has to rally the troops, he is unpleasantly shrill in a way that will remind viewers of one of Leonardo DiCaprio’s lesser performances.

Joel Edgerton, who also co-wrote the script, is a bit more convincing in the role of Falstaff.  Instead of the cowardly (but wise) buffoon who appeared in Shakespeare’s plays, The King portrays Falstaff as being a great warrior who merely likes to drink too much.  This, of course, means that Hal doesn’t have to publicly rebuke Falstaff or any of his friends but it also makes Falstaff a bit of a pointless character.  In Shakespeare’s plays, both the rebuke of Falstaff and the subsequent hanging of Bardolph were meant to show that the once irresponsible Hal was now placing his role of king above all else.  By removing that aspect of the tale, The King also removes the entire heart of the narrative.  That said, Edgerton is at least convincing as a warrior.

As usually happens when it comes to British historical epics, the film leads up to an eventual battle between the British and the French.  Robert Pattinson plays The Dauphin and gives one of the most brilliantly strange performances of 2019.  Wearing a blonde wig and speaking in an exaggerated French accent, Pattison gets all of the dirtiest lines and he has fun with them.  (“You have zee big balls,” The Dauphin says at one point, “and zee little cock!”)  In fact, Robert Pattinson seems to be the only person in the film having any fun whatsoever.  Chalamet looks miserable.  Edgerton comes across like a professional.  But Pattinson appears to be having the time of his life and you’re happy to see him if just because he provides a (too brief) respite from the film’s otherwise dour atmosphere.

As I said, The King is a strange film.  I’m not really sure what the point of it was.  The battle scenes are effectively bloody and the sets are all convincingly 15th century.  But otherwise, this movie is too pointless and too long.  Just because it’s about the 100 Years War doesn’t mean that film has to feel like a 100 hours.