Retro Television Review: Homicide: Life On The Street 5.10 “Blood Wedding”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC!  It  can be viewed on Peacock.

This week, Pembleton gets his first case as the primary.

Episode 5.10 “Blood Wedding”

(Dir by Kevin Hooks, originally aired on December 13th, 1996)

A robbery at a bridal store leave public defender Meryl Hansen (Delanie Yates) dead.  Meryl was the fiancée of State’s Attorney Ed Danvers.  Danvers was with her when she was shot and he’s now obsessed with getting justice.  He is not happy when he discovers that Pembleton is the primary on the case.  Pembleton is still recovering from a stroke.  In fact, this is his first case as primary since he returned to active duty.  Meanwhile, Pembleton is not happy with the way Danvers keeps trying to tell him how to do his job.

Meanwhile, Giardello meets with the former members of Kellerman’s squad and asks them if they are planning on naming Kellerman to the Grand Jury.  Everyone says that they’re not going to name him …. except for one former detective who explains that, if he names Kellerman, his own sentence will be reduced.  Giardello even goes to the police commissioner (Al Freeman, Jr.) in search of help.  The Commissioner resents Giardello’s independent streak.  He’s not only not going to help, he’s also going to actively make Giardello’s life difficult.

As for Kellerman, he spends his time either sitting on his boat or drinking at the Waterfront or bothering his new lover, Dr. Cox, at work.  When he’s informed that the Grand Jury has been delayed until the end of January, it’s another weight on his shoulders.

In the end, Pembleton does find the man who shot Meryl Hansen but, by the time the Julius Cummings (R. Emery Bright) is captured, he’s already disposed of the gun used in the crime.  There’s enough evidence to put Cummings away for an unrelated robbery but not for murder.  Danvers suddenly wonders if he’s been to quick to compromise as a prosecutor.  After Danvers goes to the jail and tells Cummings that he will spend the rest of his life proving that Cummings is guilty of murder, Cummings hangs himself in his cell.

I have to admit that, for once, I actually found the Kellerman stuff to be more compelling than the main story.  Don’t get me wrong.  Andre Braugher and Kyle Secor were both great.  Zeljko Ivanek was excellent and he had a few good scenes with Melissa Leo, who has been rather underused this season.  But the main storyline felt more like something one would find on Law & Order than Homicide.  Pembleton’s very first case as primary turning out to be a red ball?  It was a bit too much of a coincidence to be effective.

The Kellerman stuff, however, gave Yaphet Kotto a chance to do something more than just give out orders.  Watching him go from detective to detective and slyly ask them if they were going to name Kellerman was a joy.  The scene between him and Al Freeman, Jr. was well-played by both actors.

That said, let’s hope this Kellerman thing gets resolved soon.  Lewis needs his partner!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell 2.3 “Save The Max”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Bayside Radio is on the air!

Episode 2.3 “Save The Max”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on September 22nd, 1990)

Uh-oh!  Max is about to lose The Max!  The land that the Max is sitting on belongs to the school board and, if Max the owner can’t come up with $10,000 in back rent, he’s going to lose the restaurant.  As Jessie puts it, “our favorite hang-out is going to become a parking lot!”

Here’s the thing — so what?  I mean, seriously, is it that hard to find a place to get a hamburger in California?  For the most part, the Max has always come across as being a fairly tacky place.  It’s hard for me to imagine anyone over the age of eleven thinking that Max’s magic tricks were worth watching.  Even more importantly, why didn’t Max pay his rent?  Max is an adult.  He’s a grown man.  Why does it fallon a group of teenagers to take care of Max’s problems?  Pay your own damn bills, Max!

Fortunately (I guess), Zack has recently re-launched the school radio station.  This is the episode where Zack and Screech discover the radio station in the school basement and Mr. Belding appears in a flashback as a 40 year-old hippie high school student with a thick mustache.  I’m not really sure to whom the radio station is supposed to appeal.  Zack pretending to be “Wolfman Zack” is cringe city.  Screech’s mystery theater is embarrassing.  Lisa’s gossip show would probably lead to multiple lawsuits today.  Aren’t these people supposed to be in class?  Are the other students actually okay with Zack and his friends being the only ones who actually get to do anything interesting at school?

The best thing about this episode is that it gives Slater a showcase.  This is the first episode to feature Slater as a guy who is always confident until he’s either talking into a microphone or looking at video camera.  Whenever he knows he’s being recorded, Slater suddenly freezes up.  Slater’s awkwardness is actually pretty endearing and it makes him a more compelling character than Zack.  With Zack automatically being good at everything, it’s actually kind of nice to get to watch Slater conquer his doubts and prove himself.

Do the kids — and Mr. Belding — go on the air for 24 hours in an attempt raise enough money to save the Max?  You bet they do!  But it’s not until Slater grabs the microphone and talks about how the Max was the first place that he ever felt as if he really belonged that the money starts to come in.  I think one reason that the Gang was having trouble raising money is that all of the Bayside students were at the Max for the telethon.  Seriously, I’m really not sure who was donating all that money at the end of this episode.  I guess Slater has groupies.  Hey, why not?  He’s earned them.

Seriously, though — couldn’t Max have just paid his rent!?  What a deadbeat!

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 5/10/26 — 5/16/26


Hollywood Demons (HBOMax)

This week’s episode took a look at prescription drug abuse in Hollywood.  It really didn’t have anything new to say about the subject.

Kyōryū Sentai Zyuranger (Shout TV)

I watched three more episodes of this odd series on Friday night.  The monsters were even more trippy than usual!

The N.Y. Friars Club Roast of Chevy Chase (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched this infamous roast from 2003.  Chevy Chase was roasted by a few people who knew him and by a lot of people who didn’t.  Stephen Colbert made an early name for himself with his no-holds barred set.  I knew this is something that we’re not supposed to admit nowadays but, as I watched the roast, I actually found myself feeling a little sorry for Chase.  It’s one thing to be insulted by your friends.  It’s another thing to be insulted by strangers who genuinely seem to despise you.  At least Paul Shaffer appeared to be having fun as Chevy’s roast master.

Ronda Rousey vs. Gina Carano (Netflix)

17 seconds?  After all the hype, it’s impossible not to be disappointed with the actual fight.  That said, I’ve always felt that Gina Carano was not treated fairly by Disney so I’m glad she appears to be making a comeback of sorts.

Saved By The Bell (Tubi)

My review of Saved By The Bell will be dropping soon, assuming I don’t fall asleep before I can write it.

Watched and Reviewed:

  1. 1st & Ten,
  2. Baywatch,
  3. CHiPs,
  4. Crime Story,
  5. Decoy,
  6. Freddy’s Nightmares,
  7. Hunter,
  8. The Love Boat,
  9. Pacific Blue,
  10. Saved By The Bell: The New Class,
  11. St. Elsewhere

Retro Television Review: Baywatch 2.4 “Money, Honey”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch, which ran on NBC and then in syndication from 1989 to 2001.  The entire show can be viewed on Tubi.

This week is pretty pointless.

Episosde 2.4 “Money, Honey”

(Dir by Monte Markham, originally aired on October 7th, 1991)

When Mitch and Eddie are hired to serve as lifeguards at a Hollywood party, film producer Dita (Leslie Easterbrook) is impressed when she sees Mitch respond to a boating accident.  She decides to make Mitch into a movie star.  Everyone knows that Mitch can swim and run in slow motion but can he deliver scripted lines?  Dita doesn’t care.  She just wants to sleep with him.  That goes against Mitch’s ethics so his film career ends before it even begins.  Meanwhile, Shauni puts together a benefit to protect a sea lion habitat.  At first, it looks like Shauni won’t be able to raise the money but then Mitch donates his movie paycheck to the cause.

This was a montage episode of Baywatch.  There really wasn’t much of a plot but there certainly were a lot of montages.  Watch as Mitch nervously sits in the makeup chair.  Watch as a bunch of bikini-clad beachgoers gather for Shauni’s benefit.  Listen to the music.  Watch the images.  Don’t worry about a thing….

In short, this was a pretty pointless episode.  That said, the sea lions were cute and the scene where Captain Thorpe tried to teach Mitch how to audition did make me smile.  It’s interesting that it took only four episodes for the syndicated version of Baywatch to fall into the pattern that would definite it for the next ten years.

Late Night Retro Television Reviews: Freddy’s Nightmares 2.13 “What You Don’t Know Can Kill You”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Freddy’s Nightmares, a horror anthology show which ran in syndication from 1988 to 1990. The entire series can be found on Tubi!

This week, Freddy is just as confused as the rest of us.

Episode 2.13 “What You Don’t Know Can Kill You”

(Dir by Ken Wiederhorn, originally aired on January 7th, 1990)

Psychiatrist Dr. Rothman (David Hern) has been hypnotizing his female patients and then molesting them.   (This was something that apparently used to happen quite often with Victorian-era hypnotists.)  When a colleague (Phil Proctor) discovers what Rothman is doing, Rothman hypnotizes and programs one of his patients, Derby Brown (Fran Montano), to become an assassin.  However, Rothman screws up the programming and ends up getting shot by a hypnotized Derby.  Derby’s girlfriend suggests that Derby should have plastic surgery to disguise his appearance.  They see a handsome man’s photograph in a newspaper and they decide that’s the face they want.  As a result of the surgery, Derby now looks exactly like Vinnie (Paul Regina, playing both roles).  Unfortunately, Vinnie is a mob informant and there’s a hitman after him.

Got all that?

This episode was pretty dumb.  Paul Regina did a good job as Vinnie and his new doppelganger but, for the most part, I’m not really sure why this was even an episode of Freddy’s Nightmares.  There was nothing supernatural about either story and neither story was particularly scary.  Freddy only appeared in his host segments and he seemed to be fairly bored with the whole thing.

Usually, I love it when a show embraces the melodrama but this episode wasn’t subversive enough to work as a satire.  Despite the over the top plot, it still felt oddly generic.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 3.20 “Amazing Face”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Daily Motion.

The drama continues in Boston.

Episode 3.20 “Amazing Face”

(Dir by Janet Greek, originally aired on February 20th, 1985)

This week, at St. Eligius:

  • Nurse Rosenthal thinks that she’s pregnant.  That sound you hear is me sighing.  Seriously, I liked Nurse Rosenthal during the first season but now I’m kind of sick of her and her sanctimonious attitude, her homewrecking affair with Richard, and her annoying children.  Obviously, the show’s writers really liked Nurse Rosenthal but I’m tired of her.  A pregnant Nurse Rosenthal?  I don’t think I could handle that.  Fortunately, it turns out that Nurse Rosenthal is actually starting menopause.
  • When is Rosenthal going to dump Richard?  We all know it’s going to happen.
  • Dr. Westphall has put his house on the market and boy, is he glum about it.  Westphall continues to be the most depressing human being on the planet.
  • Mrs. Hufnagle has heart surgery.  Before that, however, she steals some scrubs and wanders in on an operation.
  • Fiscus wants to hook back up with Cathy Martin.  When a macho patient makes a misogynistic comment about Cathy, Fiscus throws a punch and gets his ass kicked.  Luckily, Cathy has learned kung fu.
  • The bandages are removed and Andrea Fordham (Ann Hearn) sees her new face.  She now looks like an average teenager.  She tells Dr. Caldwell that she’s still not ready to face the world.
  • Shirley Daniels is a patient at St. Eligius.  She tells everyone who she meets that she killed Peter White and that she can’t wait to go to jail for it.  She promises Doctors Wade and Morrison that she’ll never shoot anyone else.  She also reveals that she’s the one who sent the baby ski mask to Peter’s widow.  She’s knitting a new ski mask for Morrison’s son.  Oh, Shirley!
  • The episode ends with Shirley going to the morgue and flashing back to the time she shot Peter in the testicles.
  • Considering all the hospitals in Boston, was it really a good idea for her to stay at the same one where she happened to kill a doctor, albeit one who deserved exactly what he got?

This episode felt like filler.  Ehrlich acted like a jackass.  Morrison acted like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders.  Dr. Craig was arrogant.  Dr. Westphall was depressed.  It wasn’t a bad episode but there wasn’t anything terribly memorable about it either.

It was just another day at St. Eligius.

Song of the Day: All Time High, performed by Rita Coolidge


Since today is John Glen’s birthday, it only seems appropriate that today’s song of the day should be one of my favorite James Bond themes.  From the underrated Octopussy, here’s one of the few songs that I can sing (though I don’t sound anywhere near as good as Rita Coolidge), All Time High!

All I wanted was a sweet distraction for an hour or twoHad no intention to do the things we’ve doneFunny how it always goes with love, when you don’t look, you findBut then we’re two of a kind, we move as one
We’re an all-time highWe’ll change all that’s gone beforeDoing so much more than falling in loveOn an all-time highWe’ll take on the world and winSo hold on tight, let the flight begin
I don’t want to waste a waking moment, I don’t want to sleepI’m in so strong and so deep, and so are youIn my time, I’ve said these words before, but now I realizeMy heart was telling me lies, for you, they’re true
We’re an all-time highWe’ll change all that’s gone beforeDoing so much more than falling in loveOn an all-time highWe’ll take on the world and winSo hold on tight, let the flight begin
So hold on tight, let the flight beginWe’re an all-time high
(Songwriters: Tim Rice and John Barry)

Late Night Retro Television Review: Hunter 1.5 “Legacy”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Hunter, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1991.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, Hunter and McCall investigate a mob hit!

Episode 1.5 “Legacy”

(Dir by Ron Satlof, originally aired on November 2nd, 1984)

Gangster John Vincent (Tony Girogio) has been gunned down in his own mansion.  Detective Bernie Terwilliger thinks that it’s a case of burglary gone wrong.  Rick Hunter thinks that it was a mob hit and that one of John’s sons is responsible.  He and McCall search for Sandy Newton (Mary-Margaret Humes), the woman who was with Michael Vincent (Vincent Baggetta) the night that his father was killed.

I have to admit that I had totally forgotten that Rick Hunter was supposed to be the son of a mobster.  This episode featured Rick associating with his childhood buddies and, if nothing else, it showed just how unconvincing Fred Dryer was as the scion of a mob family.  Don’t get me wrong.  Fred Dryer was great when he was gunning down a suspect and then saying, “Works for me.”  And Fred Dryer had a fun chemistry with Stepfanie Kramer.  But there was absolutely nothing about Fred Dryer that, in any way, said, “Mobster.”  Surrounding Dryer with a bunch of tough-looking Italian-American character actors did nothing to change the fact that Dryer essentially looked like a former football player from sunny California.

This episode had a predictable story but it also had two good action scenes: a fight on a pier and a mob hit in a warehouse.  It also introduced John Amos as Captain Dolan, who is the new police captain but who appears to dislike Hunter and McCall just as much as the previous captain.  It’s hard not to feel that Amos will be entertaining as he yells at Hunter for not following regulations and costing the city money.

We’ll see how it goes!