Today, the Academy announced the 74 songs that have been ruled eligible for a Best Original Song nomination! And you know what that means — it’s time for my to post the list! (Our longtime readers should know, by now, how much I love lists!)
The big news is that the 2nd song from the end credits of Love & Mercy — the one that everyone was expecting to be a front runner — has been ruled ineligible. Here’s what is eligible! Be sure to listen to all of these songs before the Oscar nominations are announced in January…
“Happy” from “Altered Minds”
“Home” from “Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip”
Right now, the jury’s out on whether or not Steven Spielberg’s Bridge of Spies will be an Oscar champ or an Oscar also-ran. But, regardless of how things go with the Academy, Spielberg’s follow-up to Bridge of Spies is already scheduled for a July 1st, 2016 release! It’s called The BFG and here’s the trailer!
Here’s the latest trailer for Jane Got A Gun, featuring Natalie Portman, Joel Edgerton, a hot air balloon, and a gun! This movie will be released on January 29th, 2016!
Well, no, actually it’s not. It’s a very serious film that has a few comedic moments. Matt Damon makes a few jokes but that’s largely because he’s trying not to lose his mind and commit suicide. However, The Martian was submitted to the Golden Globes as a comedy. Why? Probably because the producers realized that it would be easier for them to win if their film was the only big-budget drama nominated in the comedy category. It’s dishonest, it’s unethical, and it totally worked. This morning, when the Golden Globe nominations were announced, The Martian was nominated for Best Picture, Comedy or Musical.
I was not a particularly huge fan of The Martian to begin with. The fact that it has now been nominated for Best Comedy while Inside Out was not does not help matters.
Anyway, as for the rest of the Golden Globe nominations … actually, I like a lot of them. Mad Max: Fury Road was nominated for Best Picture, Drama and that should help it regain whatever momentum it may have lost after not being nominated by the SAG. The Big Short was also nominated for Best Picture, Comedy so I guess I really will have to see it, despite having no desire to do so. Trumbo was not nominated for Best Picture but it did pick up nominations for Bryan Cranston and Helen Mirren. Spotlight was naturally nominated for best picture but received no acting nominations, which means that either all the actors are splitting the votes among themselves or maybe Spotlight, while remaining the front-runner, is not as universally loved as some are thinking. It’s impossible for me to say because I haven’t seen Spotlight yet but I have noticed that a lot of critics seem to be more respectful than enthusiastic about it.
(At the same time, my friend, the sportswriter Jason Tarwater, was quite enthusiastic after seeing Spotlight and I usually trust his opinion on these things.)
Anyway, here are the Golden Globe Film nominations!
Did you like The Passion Of The Christ (2004), but felt it needed slapstick comedy to go along with its overuse of slow motion? Well don’t worry, cause Brazilian Star Wars has got your back. Just like Turkish Star Trek is actually an entry in a different series of movies, this is one in a series of films that featured a Brazilian comedy troupe called The Tramps. They basically run around acting like silent comedians. In fact, the movie has little dialog in it. They must have thought it would be fun to stick them into Star Wars cause I guess sticking them into Planet Of The Apes went over so well in 1976.
The movie opens up exactly like Star Wars. By that, I mean a car chase.
Like almost every scene in this movie, it seems to go on forever. Oh, and it starts with the slow motion right off the bat like these two shots.
It turns out the Tramps were being chased because one of them fooled around with a girl who was already with someone. All you need to know is that this means they are stuck camping out in the middle of nowhere. But before Star Wars can enter into their lives, we need some more comedy. Enter the turtle with a candle on it’s back.
This leads to a guy being set on fire.
And don’t let the comedic opportunity of a fire extinguisher and a black member of the Tramps go to waste!
Now comes Star Wars.
But first, let’s get a good look at each Tramp.
Now it’s time to meet this movie’s Luke Skywalker.
Or Flik. I don’t care. I’ll just call him Hunk Skywalker. He’s there to tell them he needs their help to retrieve half of the brain computer. It is being held by Zuco AKA Darth Vader. He offers to pay them their weight in gold. So of course they agree and go to board the ship. Then Chewbacca pops up in the entrance. This is when this film introduces us to another annoying thing it will do. They see Chewbacca, run away, then the footage is reversed, and they go into the ship. They will also sometimes simply repeat a shot several times for…comedy? Regardless, here’s Chewbacca.
Now we go to Hunk Skywalker’s planet and a battle ensues that goes on forever with so much slow motion.
All that’s important here is that Zuco kidnaps this movie’s Princess Leia.
After one of the sand people blows up a hut, we get introduced to the multi-colored ladies.
I guess the movie thought it needed to add some women in because otherwise it was too much of a sausage fest. That, and maybe this already colorful movie needed even more color. I don’t know, they serve about as much purpose as the Tramps in this movie. After a little travel we come to Brazilian Star Wars’ version of the bar scene. It’s a disco!
Here’s another scene that goes on for EVER!!! Actually I think it comes out to about 10-14 minutes of the movie. Dancing, fighting, and Hunk Skywalker talking to a guy named Igor about where to find Zuco. Eventually this nonsense comes to an end. Then just in case we weren’t sure this was the 1970’s.
Yellow tramp gets hungry and refuses to just eat a pill. He goes off and cracks open a giant egg.
And I’m pretty sure that’s what the Phoenix would have looked like if the Tramps were in Harry Potter.
Then Yellow Tramp spots Zuco and his soldiers which means more pointless scenes. They wind up underground.
After Brazilian Farrah Fawcett looks around, they run into a giant spider.
Oh, no!
Eventually, they make their way out. Too bad the spider didn’t get them so we could be spared this Hunk Skywalker dream.
Do I even need to tell you that’s all in slow motion? Then we get a flashback to the car chase at the beginning of the film since it’s crucial we be reminded of that.
After some talking and this…
they go to make an exchange with Zuco. Their half of the brain computer for the princess. This doesn’t go well. They make the exchange but then the princess takes off a mask and it’s this.
But at least this scene gives us a line that should be immortalized right along side “Use the force”.
Apparently, that meant hanging them over spikes.
They didn’t count on Yellow Tramp to be in the box instead of the brain computer. This leads to another scene that goes on forever.
Eventually this comes to an end and they take Zuco’s men prisoner.
After putting the brain computer back together almost everything is fixed like this city emerging from who knows where. At least I think it’s a city.
Now Hunk Skywalker finally asks Zuco where his princess is. Turns out making that fake mask for the exchange killed her in the process. Isn’t that nice. Yellow Tramp decides he is going to stay with the Yellow Lady, but there’s one problem. Turns out when the princess dies, her older sister takes over as princess.
After the movie gives us false hope…
they wake up back home. At first they think it was a dream, but there’s damage from where the spaceship landed. Then Hunk Skywalker flies by and not only is their Jeep full of gold, but the Jeep itself is gold. The End!
I actually watched this for the first time a couple of years ago and liked it. I didn’t like it this time. The scenes really do go on way too long with way too much slow motion. The comedy is unfunny to say the least. This might be fun for a little kid, but for everyone else, it just means we should all be saying “Now everyone will die the primitive way.”
The nominees for the SAG Awards were announced earlier today! The SAG Awards are usually one of the more accurate of the various Oscar precursors. Because so many members of the Academy are also members of the Screen Actors Guild, the SAG Awards are usually a pretty good indication of what films are on the Academy’s radar and which ones aren’t. Occasionally, an actor will be nominated by SAG and then snubbed by the Academy. Last year, for instance, SAG nominated Jake Gyllenhall for Nightcrawler, Jennifer Aniston for Cake, and Naomi Watts for St. Vincent. None of those three received any love from the Academy. But, for the most part, SAG is one of the most reliable precursors out there.
And that’s why so many of us are in shock today! The SAG Awards in no way resembled what many of us were expecting. Other than Spotlight, none of the film’s that many of us expected to be nominated for best ensemble (the SAG’s equivalent of the Academy’s best picture) were nominated (and even Spotlight only received one other nomination, for Rachel McAdams who, up to this point, hasn’t really figured into the Oscar discussion). The Martian was not nominated for best ensemble or anything else for that matter. Creed was totally snubbed. Brooklyn was nominated for actress but not ensemble. Mad Mad: Fury Roadwas nominated for its stunt work and nothing else. Helen Mirren received two nominations, for films that hardly anyone (outside of the SAG, obviously) was really paying any attention to. Sarah Silverman received a best actress nomination for I Smile Back, which I hadn’t even heard of until about a week ago. It’s an unexpected and strange group of nominees.
Keep in mind, it’s not necessarily a bad thing that the nominees are unexpected. Beasts of No Nation and Straight Outta Compton will both receive deserved boosts in their hunt for Oscar gold. At the same time, I have to admit that I wasn’t happy to see either The Big Short or Trumbo nominated for best ensemble because I know I’m going to feel obligated to see them and they both look so freaking tedious and blandly political! But consider this: if The Big Short and Trumbo are both huge Oscar contenders, we may face a situation where both Jay Roach and Adam McKay are nominated for best director in the same year. I think that’s one of the signs of the apocalypse and, at this point, I’m kind of ready to welcome the end of the world.
Anyway, here are the SAG nominations! Look them over and, after the Golden Globe nominations are announced tomorrow, update your Oscar predictions accordingly.
Best Performance by a Cast Ensemble in a Motion Picture
* Abraham Attah – “Beasts of No Nation” (Netflix)
* Chiwetel Ejiofor – “Secret in Their Eyes” (STX Entertainment)
* Michael B. Jordan – “Creed” (Warner Bros. Pictures/Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures)
* Michael Ealy – “The Perfect Guy” (Screen Gems)
* Will Smith – “Concussion” (Sony Pictures Entertainment)
Outstanding Actress in a Motion Picture
• Lauren ‘Keke’ Palmer – “Brotherly Love” (Flavor Unit)
• Sanaa Lathan – “The Perfect Guy” (Screen Gems)
• Teyonah Parris – “Chi-Raq” (Amazon Studios and Roadside Attractions)
• Viola Davis – “Lila and Eve” (Samuel Goldwyn Films)
• Zoe Saldana – “Infinitely Polar Bear” (Sony Pictures Classics)
• “Beasts of No Nation” (Netflix)
• “Brotherly Love” (Flavor Unit)
• “Chi-Raq” (Amazon Studios and Roadside Attractions)
• “Infinitely Polar Bear” (Sony Pictures Classics)
• “Secret in Their Eyes” (STX Entertainment)
Outstanding Documentary – (Film)
* “Amy” (A24)
* “Dreamcatcher” (Rise Films, Green Acres Films & Vixen Films in association with Impact Partners and Artemis Rising Foundation)
* “In My Fathers House” (Break Thru Films)
* “The Black Panthers: Vanguard of the Revolution” (PBS Distribution/Firelight Films)
* “What Happened, Miss Simone?” (A Radical Media Production in Association with Moxie Firecracker for Netflix)
Outstanding Writing in a Motion Picture (Film)
* Andrea Berloff, Jonathan Herman – “Straight Outta Compton” (Universal Pictures)
* Christopher Cleveland & Bettina Gilois, Grant Thompson – “McFarland USA” (Walt Disney Pictures)
* Pete Docter, Meg LeFauve, Josh Cooley – “Inside Out” (Disney/Pixar)
* Rick Famuyiwa – “Dope” (Open Road Films)
* Ryan Coogler, Aaron Covington – “Creed” (Warner Bros. Pictures/Metro-Goldwyn- Mayer Pictures)
Outstanding Directing in a Motion Picture – (Film)
• Alfonso Gomez-Rejon – “Me and Earl and the Dying Girl” (Fox Searchlight Pictures / Rhode Island Ave)
• Charles Stone, III – “Lila and Eve” (Samuel Goldwyn Films)
• F. Gary Gray – “Straight Outta Compton” (Universal Pictures)
• Rick Famuyiwa – “Dope” (Open Road Films)
• Ryan Coogler – “Creed” (Warner Bros. Pictures/Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures)
There was…oh wait, does this sound familiar? Did you just read those two lines and get hit by a sudden feeling of déjà vu? Well, that might be because I used those exact same lines to start my review of the 1965 Italian sci-fi film, The Tenth Victim.
They’re still applicable for this review though. In many ways, the 1984 film Warriors of the Year 2072 (a.k.a. The New Gladiators) is a loose remake of The Tenth Victim. (I imagine some critics would say it’s more of a rip-off than a remake. What you label it will probably depend on how much tolerance you have for Italian exploitation films in general.) Of course, Warriors of the Year 2072 draws inspiration from more than just The Tenth Victim. A Clockwork Orange, Escape From New York, the Mad Max films, Blade Runner; bits and pieces from all of them show up here.
Even if you didn’t already know it, you might be able to guess that this film was directed by Lucio Fulci. The film features Fulci regulars Al Cliver (of Zombi 2 fame) and Howard Ross (of New York Ripper fame) in supporting roles. Cinzia Monreale, who had her throat ripped apart in Fulci’s The Beyond, appears in a cameo in which she again has her throat ripped apart. (Actually, she just hallucinates having her throat ripped apart and is seen alive afterward, as if Fulci himself is saying, “See, it’s all just film trickery. Nobody really gets hurt in my movies.”) Finally, and most obviously, a character graphically loses an eye. It’s simply not a Fulci film without some sort of graphic ocular trauma.
The film also features a theme that would show up in a lot of Fulci’s post-New York Ripper works. Warriors of the Year 2072 is about the role of violent entertainment in both maintaining and destroying society. Which is not to say that the film really has that much to say about it. Thematically, Warriors of the Year 2072 is all surface level but those themes are still present.
As for the film itself, it takes place in the year 2072, so at least the title is being honest with us. The world is now run by competing television networks. The American television network has the highest rated show: Kill Bike, in which men on motorcycles battle to the death. Cortez (Claudio Cassinelli), the program director for Rome-based WBS-TV, is ordered by the station’s owner, the mysterious Sam, to come up with a program that will be more popular than Kill Bike. At first, Cortez tries to put on a show called The Danger Game, where people are forced to hallucinate dying in violent ways. When that show fails to beat Kill Bike, Cortez decided to just rip-off Kill Bike…
And let’s just stop a moment to point out the obvious. Neither The Danger Game nor Kill Bike would feel at all out-of-place on television today. Remember Fear Factor? How different is The Danger Game from that old show?
Anyway, Cortez’s new show is basically Kill Bike with a twist. The motorcycle combat will now take place in the Roman coliseum and the contestants will all be convicted murderers awaiting execution. Fortunately, the very popular star of Kill Bike — Drake (Jared Martin) — has recently been convicted of murder! It’s convenient how that worked out…
As we discover through the magic of slow motion flashbacks, Drake was returning home one night when he discovered that his wife had been murdered by three young men who all appeared to be doing a bad impersonation of Malcolm McDowell in A Clockwork Orange. The three men were then murdered and Drake was convicted. However, Drake insists that he’s innocent and, even when confronted by laughing hallucinations of the three men, he refuses to attack them.
Could it be that someone is framing Drake? Of course! But why…
Well, before we find out the answer to that, we watch as Drake is brought to the coliseum and is trained in gladiatorial battle. He immediately makes an enemy out of the head guard, the sadistic Raven (Howard Ross, who is hilariously over-the-top). He also bonds with the other gladiators, one of whom is named Abdul. Abdul is played by Fred Williamson, largely because it’s not a mid-80s Italian sci-fi dystopia without Fred Williamson.
Warriors of The Year 2072 cannot compare to Fulci at his best. This is no Zombi 2 or The House By The Cemetery. At the same time, it’s definitely better than most of the films that Fulci made after The New York Ripper. Fulci was a supreme stylist and, as a result, Warriors of the Year 2072 is always watchable. Even when you don’t have the slightest idea what’s going on, you still can’t quite bring yourself to look away. Yes, the special effects are nothing special. And yes, it’s obvious that futuristic Rome was just a miniature set. But the cheapness of the film gives it an odd charm. It’s the cheapest future imaginable and somehow, it actually feels appropriate. Why do we always assume the future will be sleek and shiny? Maybe it’ll look like cardboard, like in Warriors Of The Year 2072!
Warriors of the Year 2072 is a campy, frequently silly, and oddly entertaining look at the future of the human race. If you’re a Fulci fan or a lover of Italian exploitation cinema, track it down.
Well, it wouldn’t be right to let a Star Wars month go by without reviewing two of the most infamous Star Wars knockoff movies. This is the Turkish one best known for its training montage. I swear I haven’t heard the theme from Raiders Of The Lost Ark more times in my life then I did watching this movie. The movie is like watching something sci-fi fans in 1982 would have made by mashing together their favorite stuff. The two main things it combines are Star Wars and Battlestar Galactica.
A voiceover provides the setup of the movie while it literally shows footage from Star Wars in the background. I’d make a joke here about the effects looking better than the special editions, but I’m not that much of a fan. Oh, and it goes on for quite awhile it seems. Let me try to paraphrase here. People left Earth and scattered across the galaxy. A struggle to discover the secret of immortality ensued. Despite all this talk about people leaving Earth, there is apparently still an Earth tribe. However, then it says Earth was destroyed. Okay, whatever. Wait, maybe I can’t paraphrase this cause it makes NO SENSE!!!!
Okay, all you need to know is here’s Cüneyt Arkin who apparently also wrote the screenplay for this.
After getting shot down by stock footage from Star Wars, they find themselves on a desolate planet with this bad guy who looks like he belongs in a Turkish Flash Gordon movie.
They begin to wander. His friend thinks they might have landed on a planet inhabited by nothing but women. Turkish Captain America thinks he’s a ladies man in this. They see stock footage of the Sphinx, Pyramids, and hieroglyphics. Then the voiceover kicks in saying they were seeing things that look like another civilization that must have fought an unknown power and enemy millions of years ago. This part made me think of Stargate. Of course it doesn’t take long for them to attract some attention from some weird skeleton-like creatures. And this movie doesn’t disappoint. You get to see plenty of Cüneyt Arkin and Turkish Captain America leaping all over the place.
When you’ve fought weird skeleton things, you just gotta follow it up with reject sand people.
And Cylons!
Then they spot the people of this planet. There’s this guy…
who jumps off there for reasons I still don’t understand. Now we meet Turkish Robbie The Robot.
Oh, and Turkish Robbie The Robot doesn’t mess around.
After several of these Turkish Mad Max: Fury Road guys…
kill some people, Arkin and his friend decide to really fight. All you need to know is there’s a blonde with a kid that you’ll see throughout the movie and the bad guy from Turkish First Blood and Turkish Rambo is here as their leader.
After a little conversation, their leader drops the bomb on Arkin and his friend.
Yep, the 13th tribe. This is apparently a piece of Earth controlled by “the Wizard”. The Wizard being the Flash Gordon guy.
Since this is by the same director of Turkish First Blood, there are of course zombies for, um, reasons?
A fight ensues and Arkin and company are sent to go to the “Green Valley” cause, well, I have no idea what this line means, but here it is.
Yep, you apparently need strong body and believer head for fighting with Nimrod.
After the bad guy severs the heads of several zombies, he creates Turkish Abominable Snowman.
There’s some weird stuff that happens here with dead bodies, but who cares because…
it’s time to punch some fucking rocks!!!
Here are some highlights.
Not sure why the punching rocks thing happens considering Arkin will get gauntlets later. No, not Turkish Wolverine gauntlets, but gauntlets none the less. However, I do know why this happens.
It’s cause you will see Arkin fly around in this movie a lot. They made good use of trampolines in this film.
Now while this may be gone by the time you read this because of the music used, here is the full scene in all of it’s glory!
I don’t care how they make it happen, but I want to see Mark Hamill and Harrison Ford punch some rocks. Even if it’s just an extra they do on the DVD release. This needs to happen!
Now we go to the Turkish version of the bar scene. No worries about who shot first here because it just leads to a fight breaking out with one of the saddest costumes I’ve ever seen.
There’s also this guy who looks like he got lost on the way to a Turkish Kung Fu movie.
The bad guy shows up to say this…
and take them to his lair. After traveling through some stock footage they arrive.
Turkish Captain America meets this lady who is the queen of the planet, but will play basically no role in the film. Her and the bad guy seem to think the key to ultimate power and immortality is the human brain. After explaining his plan, Arkin gets this look on his face.
Gotta give the man credit. I’ve seen in him several of these now and he does do one of the best “I’m not happy and about to beat the crap out of everyone in the room” look. And he does just that. He even severs a guys arm and stabs him with it.
Badass! Of course people move in on Turkish Captain America and he joins in the fight. Unfortunately, it’s not enough and now we get to a scene that rivals the Black Widow capture and the inclines in Turkish First Blood and Turkish Rambo for the least inconvenient character inconveniences. The bad guy tries to bury them alive. Yeah, that’s going to work with these two guys. Of course it doesn’t and they simply pop back up out of the dirt.
By the way, throughout all of this stuff is the Star Wars, Raiders Of The Lost Ark, Battlestar Galactica, Flash Gordon, and other popular themes on the soundtrack.
Now we’re outside again for who knows what real reason. Doesn’t matter. It means it’s time for Arkin to battle the Snowman by jumping all over the place.
Turkish Captain America gets in on the action, but isn’t very successful and gets captured again.
Now is the time for another exposition dump. This is the first of two sequences that are quite confusing. I am obviously watching this with fan subs so it could be that, but I don’t think so. The leader of the humans tells a story that basically amounts to a sci-fi retelling of how Muslims in Arabia kept science alive while Europe plunged into darkness. He says his people are from “Islam, the greatest tribe and an established community that lived on Earth.” Makes sense, it’s a Turkish movie after all. Well, at least it makes sense at this point in the film. It won’t make sense later though. However, he does say that Muslims are a guardian of religions. I’d think this is just a typo, but given what comes up soon, I’m not sure. It probably has to do with the fact that Islam is the third in the Abrahamic faiths which doesn’t exclude the stuff that came before Mohammed. Christ himself is considered a prophet. It’s most likely a part of this film’s ultimate message of unity and peace among people.
After some fighting and…
a scene that has Turkish Captain America in Turkish A Clockwork Orange, Arkin and blonde go into the tunnels to find the sword of power. This is when we get stuff that I’m really not sure of. Apparently, the faithful went underground with Jesus as their guide. This place includes Christian religious imagery too.
You can kind of think of this as Indy going through a holy place to find something at the end that will help him. Then we get a little backstory on how the Wizard emerged from these people with an obsession for immortality. I’m really not sure if this is supposed to mean the people on the surface were separate from those underground or not. It’s confusing and I would want someone like Ed Glaser who makes a lot of videos about Turkish films to explain it to me.
All that’s really important, which is something often said when talking about Turkish Star Wars, is that Arkin has the sword and is ready to deal out some justice.
Even the Cylons have trouble because Arkin can block bullets with that thing.
After the movie drops it’s English title into the film…
Turkish Captain America just casually knocks out Arkin.
Once again, all you need to know about what happens next is Turkish Captain America gets fooled and Arkin has to come to the rescue. Sadly, Turkish Captain America is killed. Arkin gets the sword of power again and melts it down into gauntlets.
Now the movie just becomes an action sequence with a lot of Arkin jumping. Seriously, I think his jumping rivals the slow motion falling down in Brazilian Star Wars. All of this is going on while Earth is threatened with destruction and I guess is destroyed?
No time for that oddity. Just more action.
After defeating the bad guy, Arkin says goodbye, and flies off in the Millennium Falcon.
That’s it! It really is like watching something that was thrown together by sci-fi fans. It certainly is quite a mess, but a fun mess. A fun mess with some of the best movie scores of the time. Even if they were lifted. I do recommend this. Don’t know if I could watch it again, but it is fun to watch once.
