Tonight’s episode of Fear Itself is a macabre zombie story that takes place on New Year’s Day and which features a twist ending! Watch this one with the lights off.
The episode originally aired on July 17th, 2008. Director Darren Lynn Bousman is best-known for his Saw films. Personally, I’m a fan of his 2010 thriller, Mother’s Day.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00. The show is currently on Prime.
We’re back at the ski lodge!
Episode 2.21 “Feuding Friends”
(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 26th, 1994)
At the ski lodge, Mr. Belding’s sprained ankle appears to have healed. However, Tommy still has a broken leg and it’s strange to me that he’s still even at the ski lodge. I mean, this is a school trip and a broken leg is not a minor injury. It seems like most school trips would be abruptly cancelled if a student got drunk and suffered a serious injury as a result. Has anyone called Tommy’s parents?
While everyone else is enjoying the slopes, Megan stays behind and keeps Tommy company. Soon, Megan and Tommy realize that they like each other and they decide to have dinner together. Lindsay freaks out. How dare Megan date her ex-boyfriend!? Bobby gets mad too. How dare Tommy go out with the girl that Bobby likes!? At first, Rachel is neutral but then Lindsay suggests that Megan would date Brian if he ever broke up with Rachel. Rachel gets mad at Megan for something she hasn’t done yet. Brian tries to remain neutral (“I’m swiss,” he says) and Rachel calls him a wimp.
Meanwhile, a snooty fashion photographer sees Screech on the slope and takes a lot of pictures of him. How will Screech take it when he discovers that the photographer is planning to use him as an example of how not to look?
This episode …. actually, I enjoyed this episode. Yes, the whole thing with the photographer and Screech was pretty stupid. But, when it came to everyone getting mad at each other, I could actually relate to that. When Rachel got mad over something that hadn’t happened but which could happen, I felt very seen. In its undeniably Saved By The Bell way, this episode captured the dynamic of what often happens with people who have been friends forever. You fight over stupid stuff but, in the end, you always make up.
This was a good episode. I’m as shocked as anyone.
That said, I’ll be even more shocked if the Tommy/Megan romance is ever mentioned again. Saved By The Bell always has a way of creating couples and then forgetting about them one episode later.
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!
This week, Ponch is busy. The rest of the Highway Patrol is impressed.
Episode 6.11 “Day of the Robot”
(Dir by Phil Bondelli, originally aired on January 2nd, 1983)
Years ago, Emily’s younger brother was killed by a reckless driver. Now, Emily (Melody Anderson) is the leader of a group of young women who drive their motorcycles up and down the highway and keep an eye out for people who run stop signs and make unsafe lane changes. They issue their own tickets. They attempt to make citizen’s arrests. They always call the Highway Patrol before going off in pursuit but Ponch, Getraer, and even Bobby still think that they’re putting their own lives at danger. When two stereo thieves decide to get revenge on Emily for a ticket, can Ponch save the day?
Meanwhile, a robot named MERV has been loaned to the Highway Patrol to help with filing and other tasks. When it turns out that MERV has a short in its system that’s turned it into a “ticking time bomb,” can Ponch figure out how shut it down so it can be repaired before it accidentally blows up the children’s wing of the hospital?
Of course, he can. Ponch can do anything!
This episode was a good example of how, during the show’s final season, everyone at the Highway Patrol was pretty much useless except for Ponch. Ponch is the one who knows exactly what to say to Emily. Ponch is the one who saves a bunch of sick kids from a potentially explosive situation. Ponch is practically the only member of the Highway Patrol who couldn’t easily be replaced by a robot.
One gets the feeling that the show’s producers were getting a little desperate during season 6. Not only have we had a UFO and a tragic death but this season has also given us a robot. Remember how the early seasons mostly just tried to be a realistic portrait of the day-to-day activities of the Highway Patrol?
Those days are over. The episode reminds us that CHiPs is now….
On the plus side, at least the robot was cute.
On tonight’s episode of Fear Itself, a young police officer (Elisabeth Moss) finds herself assigned to be a part of a detail that is guarding a serial killer cannibal named Duane Mellor (Stephen R. Hart). As the night goes on, strange things start to happen and it becomes apparent that Mellor has powers and habits that go beyond just eating people.
You may have noticed that I skipped the fourth episode of Fear Itself. That episode was In Sickness and In Health and it was about a bride-to-be who, on her wedding day, receives a note that reads, “The person you are marrying is a serial killer.” It all leads to a pretty predictable twist. The reason why I decided not to post that episode is because it was written by Victor Salva, a filmmaker who sexually abused the 12 year-old star of his first film and who, after serving 15 months in prison, somehow went on to continue making movies. I’ve made a personal decision not to review anything involving Victor Salva. That said, I do think everyone has to make their own decision as far as problematic filmmakers are concerned so I will say that the episode is on YouTube if you want to watch it.
As for Eater, it’s an intense and atmospheric episode that benefits from Stuart Gordon’s strong direction and which features good performances from both Moss and Hart. You can watch it below!
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Crime Story, which ran on NBC from 1986 to 1988. The entire show can be found on Tubi!
Today, we start the second season of Crime Story!
Episode 2.1 “The Senator, The Movie Star, and the Mob”
(Dir by John Nicolella, originally aired on September 22nd, 1987)
The second season of Crime Story opens with Torello, Abrams, and the Task Force still in Las Vegas. With Luca and Pauli apparently dead as a result of that nuclear blast at the end of the first season, various gangsters are trying to position themselves as Manny Weisbord’s new man in Vegas. Carlo Mastrangelo (Stephen McHattie) is the latest contender.
(And yet, it’s hard not to notice that, during the opening credits, both Tony Denison and John Santucci are listed. Neither appears in this episode other than in the pictures displayed at their funeral. But the credits don’t seem quite convinced that Luca and Pauli are dead.)
Crusading Senator Rourke (Kevin Spacey, in his first major television role) comes to Vegas. Rourke—the son of a former bootlegger and a presidential contender who speaks with a slightly abrasive Boston accent—is holding hearings on the Mob. Also arriving in Vegas is Pamela Palmer (Jenny Wright), a platinum-blonde movie star known for her glamorous sex appeal but who spends almost the entire episode hiding a black eye behind her sunglasses. As Torello discovers, Pamela is Mastrangelo’s occasional girlfriend, but she’s also having an affair with Senator Rourke.
Anyone who has studied history or who has an interest in conspiracy theories will be able to see the obvious real-world parallels. Rourke, with his bootlegger father and his less-than-ideal private life, is an obvious stand-in for both John and Robert F. Kennedy. (Of course, when seen today, the casting of Kevin Spacey in the role brings a whole other dimension to it. Now we instinctively distrust Rourke as soon as we see him, despite the fact that the show portrays him as sincere in his crusade against the Mob.) Pamela is Marilyn Monroe. Mastrangelo and his second-in-command Bobby Meeker (Michael Wincott) bring to mind Sam Giancana and Johnny Roselli, two of the mobsters whose names regularly turn up in JFK assassination lore.
In real life, a heartbroken Marilyn Monroe overdosed and both Kennedy brothers were assassinated. On Crime Story, Torello is able to prevent Mastrangelo from assassinating Rourke, and an emotionally strengthened Pamela is able to leave Las Vegas for what will hopefully be a brighter future than the one that awaited Marilyn. This episode feels like a work of alternative history, one in which the Kennedys lived up to their promise and one determined man like Mike Torello could prevent a nation from being traumatized.
For a history nerd like me, this episode was enjoyable. It held my interest. I liked seeing how the show reimagined history. At the same time, Luca and Pauli were definitely missed. A format in which Torello deals with a villain-a-week doesn’t carry the same emotional punch as watching Torello obsess, episode after episode, on just one particularly nasty villain. Because Luca and Torello were opposite sides of the same driven coin, not having Luca around makes it feel as if Torello is incomplete as well.
That said, this episode ended with a shot of a bandaged man sitting on a beach in Mexico. Could that man be Luca? Hopefully, we’ll find out soon!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi: The Next Generation, which aired from 2001 to 2015! The series can be streamed on YouTube and Tubi.
If you’re a fan of the Emma Nelson death stare, this episode is for you. Emma spends the entire episode giving Sean the death stare.
Episode 3.13 “This Charming Man”
(Dir by Stefan Scaini, originally aired on December 10th, 2003)
Emma says she’s ready to move on from Sean, and for her, that means dating Chris (Daniel Keith Morrison). Chris is happy to finally be with Emma, but it soon becomes obvious that she’s not done being obsessed with Sean. Convinced that Sean and Jay are responsible for stealing both Snake’s laptop and the school’s DVD player, Emma tells Mr. Raditch that she and Chris saw Sean and Jay putting the DVD player into Jay’s car. When Sean learns he’s been fingered by an anonymous tipster, he figures out it was Emma. “You know I’m on probation!” he shouts at her. Raditch tells Sean to calm down. Sean tells Raditch to go to hell. Sean gets two months of morning detention, while Emma smiles.
This is a good example of how Emma is never really held responsible for any of her actions. The truth of the matter is that Jay and Sean are the ones stealing stuff from the school. However, Emma still lied about seeing Jay and Sean with the DVD player. Chris calls Emma out for lying and breaks up with her. After Emma apologizes to him (but not to Jay, Sean, or Mr. Raditch), Chris takes her back. Chris doesn’t seem too worried that Emma literally tried to send her last boyfriend to jail.
From the start of this season to her final appearance on the show, the perpetually self-righteous Emma really did become insufferable. Fortunately, this episode has an amusing B-plot in which Spinner, Paige, Hazel, and Jimmy all take driver’s education together. The problem is that their instructor, Mr. Falcone (Jim Thorburn), is a total hunk, and Paige gets so distracted by his presence in the car that she runs over several orange cones. Spinner, meanwhile, gets so jealous that when it’s his turn to drive, he runs over a cardboard cutout of a family trying to cross the road.
“Really, Spin!?” Paige says from the back seat. “A family!?”
Spinner then accidentally crashes into a parked car. No license for him!
Oh, this plot made me smile. I had such a hard time with driver’s ed, and it was mostly because the instructor wouldn’t stop talking. “Both hands on the steering wheel.” “Watch the road.” “You’re on the wrong side of the street.” “YIELD!” Bleh!
I actually came home from driving school in tears once. My mom immediately went down to the school and yelled at the instructor. Then the owner of the school rode with me to see if I was really as bad a driver as the instructor claimed. Her verdict was that I had a lazy eye, which I definitely don’t. Anyway, the important thing was that I eventually got my license and now I speed everywhere.
Where was I? Oh yeah, Degrassi. Emma’s the worst, but at least this episode featured some quality time with Paige and Spinner.
On tonight’s episode of Fear Itself, a family man (Colin Ferguson) and a serial killer (Clifton Collins, Jr) both have near-death experiences and end up switching bodies. Before you can say “I’m going to take his …. face …. off,” the family man finds himself in prison and the serial killer finds himself living with a family! Why, it would be almost be funny if not for the fact that the killer specializes in killing families.
This episode aired on June 19th, 2008. Ronny Yu also directed Freddy vs Jason.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC! It can be viewed on Peacock.
This week, it’s yet another Falsone episode.
Episode 6.6 “Birthday”
(Dir by Alison MacLean, originally aired on November 7th, 1997)
This episode is an example of the good, the bad, and the ugly.
The good part of the episode is that Mary Pembleton finally goes into labor and gives birth to a son. Andre Braugher was so intense on this show that it was always nice to see an episode where Frank could just be happy.
The bad is that Georgia Rae Mahoney has surveillance camera footage of Kellerman killing Luther Mahoney. The Mahoney stuff is just getting dragged out. As Luther Mahoney, Erik Todd Dellums was a magnificent villain. Hazelle Goodman is considerably less compelling as Georgia Rae but, then again, the writers aren’t doing her any favor by having Georgia Rae always talk like a comic book villain.
The ugly is that the main storyline is yet another Falsone story. This time, Falsone, Lewis, and Stivers investigate the rape and violent assault of a woman named Grace Riviera (Allison Folland). As you might expect, Falsone takes the case — wait for it — PERSONALLY! When one suspect doesn’t give Falsone the answers that he wants in the box, Falsone beats him up. He guarantees Giardello that he will close the case. Giardello responds that he likes Falsone. Well, good for Giardello, I guess.
As I’ve said before, there’s several problems with Falsone’s character. The biggest one is that Falsone doesn’t really have much depth, especially when compared to characters like Pemblton, Bayliss, or even Lewis. He’s a collection of cop show cliches. He’s the epitome of everything that Homicide was supposed to be against. Jon Seda’s one-note performance is jarring when compared to the rest of the cast. Callie Thorne’s Laura Ballard may not be a particularly interesting addition to the ensemble but at least Thorne can show a hint of emotion.
The biggest problem with Falsone is the way that this season keeps trying to force him on the viewer. If a viewer wants to watch Pembelton, Bayliss, Munch, or any of other other detective solve a murder, they’re out of luck. It’s the Falsone show!
This episode ends with Falsone going to the hospital to tell Grace that he’s arrested the man who attacked her, just to discover that Grace died. It’s not the shocking moment that the show meant it to be. And emotionally, it falls flat because it’s a Falsone moment.
Homicide is the series that I want to review. I have no interest in The Falsone Show.
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!
This week, someone gets caught cheating!
Episode 3.8 “Fake IDs”
(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on October 19th, 1991)
Having finally reached the point where he’s ready to move on from Kelly, Zack Morris resorts to lying to get a new girlfriend. He tells USC freshman Danielle (Julie St. Claire) that he’s a fellow Trojan. He claims to be a photojournalism major who spends all of his time in his darkroom. That’s why she never sees him on campus. Wink wink.
When Danielle invites him to the Attic, an 18-and-up club, Zack instructs Screech to use the skills he’s learned in photography class to make fake IDs. Zack, Slater, and Screech sneak out of Zack’s house and hit the Attic. Screech gets chased by an older woman named Reggie. Slater spends the whole night talking about how much he misses Jessie. Zack dances with Danielle. It’s a great night until they spot Kelly’s new boyfriend, Jeff, dancing with a girl who isn’t Kelly.
“Whoa!” Zack, Slater, and Screech all say at the same time.
When Jessie and Lisa hear that the guys went to an over-18 club, they decide they want fake IDs as well. Meanwhile, when Zack tells Kelly about seeing Jeff, Kelly accuses Zack of being jealous. But when Jeff gives a half-hearted excuse for why he can’t go out with her that night, Kelly asks Screech to make her a fake ID as well.
The next night, Zack’s parents are at a Peter, Paul and Mary concert. Zack goes to the Attic with Slater, Screech, Lisa, and Jessie and is shocked when he can’t find Danielle. What Zack doesn’t know is that Danielle called the house to tell him she would be arriving late, and the phone was answered by Mrs. Morris (Melody Rogers). Mrs. Morris stops singing “Puff the Magic Dragon” just long enough to ask, “What’s the Attic?”
At the Attic, Kelly arrives just in time to spot Jeff dancing with his other girlfriend. She yells, “I broke up with a great guy for you!” “It’s not like we’re going steady,” Jeff replies. “We’re through!” Kelly says, and I can only assume that Kelly is also going to quit the job she so desperately needed just a few episodes ago.
Kelly, Jessie, and Lisa go off together so that Kelly can spend a few minutes “yelling in the ladies’ room.” Danielle and Mrs. Morris show up at the same time. Zack introduces his mom as his “young-looking older sister.” Mrs. Morris orders Zack, Slater, and Screech out to the car. They leave, and we’re left to wonder how Kelly, Jessie, and Lisa are going to get home.
To be honest, I kind of hate this episode. Jeff cheating on Kelly comes out of nowhere, and it’s totally against everything we’ve already learned about the character. Previously, the whole point of Jeff’s character was that he was a nice guy who didn’t intentionally set out to break up Zack and Kelly. In this episode, he’s suddenly a jerk.
That said, there are actually a few funny moments to be found, like Lisa trying to shove Zack away while he’s looking for Danielle. Slater’s loyalty to Jessie was actually pretty sweet, and even Screech was a bit less annoying than usual. It’s a well-done episode, even if it only exists to reset the Kelly/Zack relationship.
I just hope Kelly, Jessie, and Lisa were able to find a way home.
2026 Video Music Awards (Sunday Night, CBS)
I had them on but I also mostly had them on mute because I don’t feel like listening to any political speeches. My Sunday attention was divided by the Vide0 Music Awards and old TV shows on YouTube. That said, I definitely did notice Madonna. I know Madonna’s gotten a lot of criticism over her somewhat odd behavior at the VMAs but, to be honest, I thought it was kind of refreshing to just have someone who didn’t really care up on stage. With Madonna, you were never sure what she might say and that was quite a contrast to Taylor Swift and Sabrina Carpenter.
The Amazing Race (Wednesday Night, CBS)
I wrote about The Amazing Race here! And then I wrote about it again!
On Friday, I watched an episode that took place at a bar called Hogwash. The owner of the bar had a drinking problem. Jon Taffer yelled at him until he poured out his pitcher of beer. Whatever works, I suppose.
Big Brother (Sunday and Thursday Night, CBS)
It’s over! It’s finally over! I tried to cover this season of Big Brother over at Reality TV Chat Blog but I have to admit that I never really got into the latest installment. This was one of the blandest seasons that I can remember. That said, I was happy when Rick Devens won on Thursday. They may have hated him on Twitter (and I’m not sure why) but everyone else loved him enough to award him with the title of America’s Favorite Player.
On Monday, I rewatched the first season premiere of Big Brother. Originally airing way back in 2000, this was the very first episode of Big Brother, back when CBS was still pretending that it was a social experiment and Julie Chen was still trying to convince people that she was a serious journalist and not a game show host. As I watched the episode, memories came flooding back of watching the first season with my mom. We both liked Chicken George. We were happy Eddie won. We thought Brittany was annoying. And Curtis Chen was our favorite. I understand that Curtis is a judge now. As for the first episode, it was definitely humorous to watch Julie and special correspondent Ian O’Malley breathlessly talk about how Big Brother was doing something that had never been done before …. except, of course, Big Brother had been done before. Big Brother originated in the Netherlands and the first season of the UK version pretty much ran concurrently with the American version. From the start, Big Brother was pretty silly.
Blind Date (Nosey)
I watched a few episodes on Sunday night. I had totally forgotten about this silly show. Needless to say, I only cared about tracking down the episodes with bad blind dates. The good dates were always boring.
Cheaters (Tubi)
On Tuesday, I relaxed my racing mind by watching two episodes of this classic reality show. I cheered whenever I recognized any place that I had been in Dallas.
The Curse of Degrassi (YouTube)
As always, I started off my October by watching The Curse of Degrassi!
Doctor, Doctor (YouTube)
This was an old sitcom from the 80s, one that starred Matt Frewer as an annoyingly goofy doctor. Jeff, Brad, and I joined our friendly Patrick and Dani in watching an episode on Friday because it featured Dennis Haskins as a charlatan pushing a phony weight loss supplement.
E! True Hollywood Story — Eight Is Enough (YouTube)
On Sunday, I watched this edition of the E! True Hollywood Story almost at random. Eight Is Enough is a show that I had previously never heard of but it did have an interesting story behind it, from Mark Hamill being cast shortly before the release of Star Wars to John Travolta’s much older girlfriend dying shortly after being cast as the mother of eight children. The show was big in the 70s and early 80s so, of course, the special was full of actors talking about getting famous and abusing drugs.
E! True Hollywood Story — Herve Villechaize (YouTube)
I watched this episode of the E! True Hollywood Story on Sunday. What a sad life Herve lived. The special covered both Herve’s time on and his exit from Fantasy Island and also the circumstances of his tragic death. It also took a look at how Herve became an advocate for abused children. Herve was definitely a complicated person but he definitely tried to do some good in this world of ours.
Fear Itself (YouTube)
I’ve been watching and sharing episodes of Fear Itself for this year’s horrorthon. Click here for the first episode and here for the second one, which stars Eric Roberts!
Football Game: Chiefs vs Dolphins (Sunday, Paramount+)
*Gasp* Taylor wasn’t at the game!
Football Game: Cowboys vs Ravens (Sunday, CBS)
They were playing in Brazil! I’m not sure why I watched. I don’t even like football. Maybe I just needed a distraction from the stress that I was under. I’m not surprised the Cowboys lost. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the Cowboys win a game.
Lauren Lake’s Paternity Court (Tubi)
On Tuesday morning, as I scheduled and reviewed the posts for the first day of Horrorthon, I used Lauren Lake’s Paternity Court as background noise. I love the way the people in the courtroom always seems to resent having to say, “Good Day” to Judge Lake.
Saved By The Bell: The New Class (Prime)
Jeff, Pat, Dani, and I watched three episodes on Saturday morning in memory of Dennis Haskins. As the only one of us who had previously watched this series, I got to show off my encyclopedic New Class knowledge.
SCTV (Netflix)
I watched two early episodes on Monday. The one that I truly remember features John Candy and Dave Thomas playing the role of The Incredible Bulk and his human alter ego, Bill Brigsby.
The Steve Wilkos Show (Nosey)
I watched two episodes on Sunday. Steve was yelling at everyone. While none of the old daytime talk shows were particularly good, I have to say that Steve, at the very least, always came across as being more sincere in his emotions than either Maury or Jerry.
I also watched a few episodes on Monday, mostly as a way to distract myself from the stress of preparing for Horrorthon. (I love Horrorthon but it’s a lot work!) One absolutely terrifying episode featured one of the worst mothers I had ever seen. For 30 years, she kept her daughter in the dark about the identity of her biological father. When he turned out to be a decent guy who refused to be bitter about the way he was treated, she got even angrier. I felt so bad for her daughter.
I then went on t0 watch three episodes on Tuesday and ended up feeling like I was wasting my life. But they did provide good background noise for when I was working on this week’s Horrorthon posts. I needed something to keep me focused and Steve Wilkos throwing chairs at people was apparently just what the doctor ordered.
On Wednesday, I wasted yet another precious hour watching Steve Wilkos. An abusive man refused to get out of the chair on Steve’s stage so Steve shoved him to the floor and then threw the chair across the stage. That was satisfying to watch! Still, I have to wonder why Steve even had the chair out there if people weren’t allowed to sit in them.
Survivor (Wednesday Night, CBS)
I reviewed Survivor here!
Unsolved Mysteries (Tubi)
I watched two Robert Stack-hosted episodes on Thursday. Both were from 1995. The first one featured the rather sad case of Philip Taylor Kramer, a former bass player for the band Iron Butterfly who later went on to found a computer company before mysteriously disappearing in 1995. This story came with an update that said Kramer’s van and body were found in 1999 but authorities couldn’t say whether his death was suicide, homicide, or a tragic accident. The second episode featured an update on a woman whose husband mysterious vanished. After seeing a story about himself on Unsolved Mysteries, the husband called his wife. It turned out that he had been attacked during a business trip and had suffered from amnesia for two years. This was followed by a story about a shrine to the Virgin Mary in Kentucky where people claimed to have had religious visions. This was interesting to me because I’ve actually been to that shrine. When I was 10, I visited it with my mom and my sisters. I did not have any visions but I do remember my mom praying for us.
