Late Night Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell 3.11 “Wicked Stepbrother: Part Two”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, the sage of Jessie’s stepbrother continues.

Episode 3.11 “Wicked Stepbrother: Part Two”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 2nd, 1991)

Picking up where the previous episode ended, Eric and Lisa survive wrecking Belding’s car.  Neither one gets checked by a doctor or anything sensible like that.  As a matter of fact, Lisa thinks it’s the most exciting thing that’s ever happened to her.  She had so much fun on her date with Eric that she even asks him if he wants to go to the MC Hammer concert with her.

Meanwhile, Zack and Slater have to figure out how to raise the $610 needed to fix the car.  They decide that, since lying has worked out so well for them so far, they should hold a rigged raffle.  Students pay Zack and Slater for the tickets, not realizing that it’s already been set up for Screech to win.  The raffle takes place in Mr. Sachs’s math class.  As Mr. Sachs solves a math problem on the board, he reads out each number.  The class applauds each numeral.  “I’ve never seen such math enthusiasm!” Mr. Sachs exclaims.  Of course, Screech has the winning number.

When Screech is initially reluctant to hand over the money that he “won,” Eric overhears Zack and Slater threatening him in the locker room.  Eric tries to blackmail Zack and Slater into giving him the money for his date with Lisa.  Zack reveals that the only reason Lisa went on her first date with Eric was because Zack bribed her with the MC Hammer tickets.

Eric confronts Lisa at the Max.  Lisa admits the truth.  Eric says he never wants to speak to her again.  As Jessie watches, Lisa sobs that, “At first, I didn’t like him.  Now, I don’t like me!”  Awww!  Poor Lisa!

Things get even more complicated when Belding returns early and wants to see his car.  It turns out that Eric convinced the auto shop teacher to totally take the car apart.  (“Uh-oh,” the studio audience says.)  When Jessie finds out, she marches into her former bedroom and punches Eric in the face.  That black eye is all Eric needs to realize that he hasn’t been very nice.  Eric puts Belding’s car back together.  Belding thinks that Slater did a wonderful job installing his CD player.

Eric also decides to return to New York but the entire gang comes over and asks him to stay in California.  Yay!  They’re all friends now!  I’m sure we’ll be seeing Eric a lot over the next few episodes.  And even if we don’t see him, I’m sure that Jessie will occasionally mention him, right?  I mean, you can’t just introduce a stepbrother, make him the center of a two-part episode, and then just forget about him, can you?  That would be crazy!

Speaking of crazy, this episode drives me up the wall.  The rigged lottery.  The car prank.  The desperate attempts to keep Belding from realizing that his car was in an accident.  It’s all a bit much and it all could have been avoided by the students of Bayside not acting like idiots.  I abhor idiot plots and that’s pretty much what this entire episode was.

If anything did redeem this episode, it was Slater getting tired of being told to fix the car and snapping, “I don’t need this pressure!”  You tell ’em, Slater!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell 3.10 “Wicked Stepbrother: Part One”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, we meet Jessie’s new stepbrother!  I’m sure he’ll be around forever.

Episode 3.10 “Wicked Stepbrother: Part One”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 2nd, 1991)

Jessie’s mom has gotten married …. again!

Now, in this episode, we don’t actually meet Jessie’s mom.  Nor do we meet her new stepfather.  In fact, she says next to nothing about her new stepfather.  Instead, this entire episode is all about Eric Tramer (Joshua Hoffman), her new stepbrother from New York!

That’s right.  Jessie has a stepbrother and I’m sure that he’s going to be a major part of the show!

(Incidentally, I’m assuming that Eric Tramer was named after script consultant Bennett Tramer.)

Unfortunately, Eric is a little bit cocky.  He’s got that New York attitude.  When Zack pretends to be Jewish so he can skip school on Rosh Hashanah and go to a baseball game, Eric finds out and blackmails him into giving up his locker.  When Jessie calls Slater a “curly Conan,” Eric records it and threatens to play it for the whole school.  Jessie gives up her bedroom to Eric.

(Hey, remember how, during the first season, Zack and Jessie lived right next to each other and Zack would regularly climb in through Jessie’s window?  Apparently, the show forgot about that.)

Eric has a weakness.  He has a crush on Lisa but Lisa doesn’t want anything to do with him.  Zack has a plan.  Belding is away for the weekend and he’s given the keys to his red sportscar to Slater so that Slater can install a CD player.  (Hello, 1990s!)  Zack offers to give Lisa two tickets to the MC Hammer concert if she agrees to go out with Eric.  Then, he and Slater allow Eric to borrow Belding’s car for his date.  Their plan is to take a picture of Eric driving Belding’s car and then …. well, I’m not sure what the next step is.  I guess they’re going to frame Eric for auto theft and send him to prison so that Zack can get his locker back.

Lisa goes out with Eric.  They go to see Casablanca.  Eric does a really bad Bogart impersonation.  Lisa is charmed.  Eric lets Lisa drive the car.  Awwww!  Zack pops up with his camera and takes a picture.  The flash blinds Lisa and she crashes Belding’s car!

“We’re trouble,” Zack says to the audience.

Hey, Zack — your best friend Lisa just crashed a car!  Maybe go check on her and make sure she’s not dead….

This is a two-part episode so we’ll take a look at the conclusion next week.  As for the first part, this whole thing is a good example of people overreacting to nothing.  Because Eric had Screech tape the baseball game, he has video evidence of Zack not being at school.  Well, so what?  Zack skips class all the time and, in this case, his absence was pre-approved.  To get Zack in trouble, Eric would have to prove that Zack was lying about being Jewish and Zack being at a baseball game doesn’t do that.  Then, Jessie gives up her room so people won’t know that she called Slater a “curly Conan.”  Jessie does this to avoid being embarrassed but would it really be that embarrassing?  Slater’s the most popular guy at school and he calls her “mama” in public.  And finally, the biggest overreaction is Zack and Slater deciding to frame Eric for a crime as opposed to just ignoring him.  It just seems like this whole thing could have been resolved by everyone going out dancing or something.

Can things get any dumber?  We’ll find out next week!

The TSL’s Horror Grindhouse: Dead Night (dir by Brad Baruh)


Hey, I’ve got an idea!  It’s Spring Break so why don’t we spend it in a cabin in the middle of a snow storm!?

Great idea!

Let’s go!

Oh, look — we’re at the cabin now and there’s some strange woman passed out front.  What should we do!?

Hey, let’s bring her inside!

Good idea!

Uh-oh, the woman’s inside and she’s alive but she’s acting kind of weird!

Hey, let’s eat dinner!

Now, in all fairness to the characters in 2018’s Dead Night, things are a bit more complex than that.  It’s not just that they decided to go up to a snowy cabin for Spring Break.  The cabin is actually supposed to be a therapeutic location.  James Pollack (AJ Bowen) is dying of cancer and it’s felt that the cabin will not only ease his pain but perhaps increase his life.  If nothing else, the wilderness will bring some sort of inner peace.  Accompanying James are his wife, Casey (Brea Grant) and their two teenage children, Jessica (Sophie Dalah) and Jason (Joshua Hoffman), and Jessica’s best friend, Becky (Elsie Luthman).

As for the mysterious woman who shows up out front of the cabin, they’re just trying to be nice when they invite Leslie Bison (Barbara Crampton) to stay in the cabin with them.  Even though Leslie can’t tell them how she ended up at their cabin, the Pollacks are not the type to just allow someone to die in the snow.  Really, we should all be more like the Pollacks, I guess.

Still, Leslie does turn out to be really obnoxious.  She makes inappropriate jokes.  She rudely asks which member of the family is dying.  She blows kisses at Jason and smirks when Jessica announces that they can’t eat until they’ve said grace.  In fact, the family is on the verge of kicking Leslie out when …. well, things happen.

What things?  We get some hints from a terrifically over the top true crime show, segments of which appear throughout the movie.  Hosted by Jack Sterling (Daniel Roebuck), the show deals with the question of how a perfect wife and mother like Casey Pollack could eventually go insane and chop up her family and friends with an ax.  Sterling tells us that, even though Casey called several people and told them that she had found a strange woman outside the cabin, the police were convinced that this was all just a part of an elaborate lie.

Hmmm….so, I guess we know what’s going to happen, right?

Well, no,  Not quite.  It turns out that the true story is a little bit different from what we might have seen on television.  For instance, Jack Steling’s show says nothing about the weird incident that happened in the early 60s, when a young woman got lost in the wood and was apparently impregnated with a piece of a tree….

If you go over to this movie’s imdb page, you’ll find a lot of angry reviews from people who felt that this movie didn’t have a real plot and that it was too gory but I don’t know.  I kind of liked it.  I mean, it’s a horror movie about people stuck in the middle of the woods.  What exactly are you expecting to get other than some nonsensical ax murders?  I mean, yes, the film doesn’t make complete sense but the cabin and the woods are both wonderfully creepy locations and the film also featured the great Barbara Crampton playing a …. well, I won’t spoil it.  Plus, I watch a lot of true crime television and I can tell you that this film’s satire of the particular genre is spot-on!

So, what can I say?  Suck it, imdb.  I kinda liked Dead Night.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #203: Designed to Kill, a.k.a. Deadly Runway, a.k.a. Fatal Fashion (dir by Doug Campbell)


Last night, I turned over to the Lifetime Movie Channel and I watched a movie that has many names.  When it was originally released on Netflix last year, I believe it was called Deadly Runway.  According to the imdb, it’s also known as Fatal Fashion.  Lifetime aired it under the title Designed To Kill.

Well, no matter which title you want to go with, I watched it!

Why Was I Watching It?

How can I review it without watching it first?  This isn’t rocket science, people!  Beyond that, though, I was in the mood for a good Lifetime melodrama.  Of course, right now, Lifetime is currently only showing Christmas movies from here to eternity.  So, if you want to see the type of Lifetime film that we all know and love, you’re only place to turn is the Lifetime Movie Network.

What Was It About?

Basically, it’s a murderous remake of Pygmalion!

Oh, you doubt me?  Well, consider this — Jennifer Higgins (Linsey Godfrey) — is given a job at the local high school, teaching a class about fashion.  David (Joshua Hoffman) ends up in her class, hoping that he can practice his skills as a photographer.  David is awkward, shy, wears glasses, has no fashion sense, and his hair is almost always a mess.  Jennifer takes one look at him and decides to prove that she can turn anyone into a super model.  Next thing you know, David has new clothes, a new haircut, and a new career.  He almost gets a new girlfriend until Jennifer gets jealous and pushes her off a ledge.

See, there are a few differences between Jennifer and Henry Higgins.  Some of them are obvious.  Jennifer is a woman and is flirtatious.  Henry was a man and a bit of a prick.  But perhaps the biggest difference is that Jennifer Higgins has a tendency to get obsessed with her models and, as mentioned above, Jennifer’s willing to kill people.

Anyway, David is enjoying his new life as a model and Jennifer is enjoying being his mentor but then it turns out that David’s friend, Caitlyn (Ellen Michelle Monohan) has model potential as well!  How will Jennifer handle it when Caitlyn and David are soon appearing on covers together?

What Worked?

Oh Hell, it all worked.  This was so over the top and fun and melodramatic that there was no way not to love it.  Linsey Godfrey was wonderfully insane as Jennifer Higgins and Monhan and Hoffman made for a very adorable couple.  This movie was a lot of fun.

And before anyone starts nitpicking this film or debating whether or not the plot fully made sense, allow me to remind you that if you’re taking a film like this seriously, you’re doing it wrong.  This film was designed to deliver pure entertainment and that’s exactly what it does!

What Didn’t Work?

It all worked!

“Oh my God!  Just like me!” Moments

I related to Caitlyn, mostly because we both have red hair, bad eyesight, and a low tolerance for alcohol.

Lessons Learned

Henry Higgins could have been worse.