Retro Television Review: Homicide: Life On The Street 5.15 “Wu’s On First?”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC!  It  can be viewed on Peacock.

This week, the guest stars take over.

Episode 5.15 “Wu’s On First?”

(Dir by Tim McCann, originally aired on Feberuary 7th, 1997)

When a cop is shot and killed, the new Baltimore Sun crime reporter, Elizabeth Wu (Joan Chen), writes up a story about what a great guy the cop was.  She is soon contacted by an informant who reveals that the cop was shot while buying drugs.  Eventually, the informant reveals that he was the one who shot the cop but he claims it was self-defense.  Wu gives up her informant to the police and when Col. Barnfather (who was embarrassed by the revelation that the victim was a dirty cop and who wants to get Wu off of the crime beat) makes a point of thanking her at the press conference, it leads to Wu being exiled from Baltimore and sent to cover the news in “the sticks.”

Meanwhile, Kellerman’s obnoxious brothers (Eric Stoltz and Tate Donovan) show up and try to convince him to move to Miami with them.  Kellerman is tempted but, when it turns out that his brothers have stolen Babe Ruth’s uniform, Kellerman remembers why he left home in the first place.  This episode features Kellerman getting arrested, though Lewis and Dr. Cox both show up to bail him out of jail.  (And don’t worry about his brothers.  They eventually get freed as well.)  In the end, Kellerman stays in Baltimore.  He does, however, give his brothers $155 to help them set things up in Miami.

This episode suffered from the guest star syndrome.  The regulars are all present but, for the most part, they take a back seat to Elizabeth Wu and Kellerman’s brothers.  Joan Chen, Eric Stoltz, and Tate Donovan are all talented but they’re not the reason why anyone would want to watch Homicide.  In Elizabeth Wu’s case, the story really does feel like fan fiction.  A new character shows up out of nowhere, all of the characters talk about how talented she is, and Giardello takes a liking to her.  This episode was co-written by David Simon (who, of course, wrote the book that the entire series was based on) and, much like the final season of The Wire, it makes the mistake of thinking that everyone else would be as interested in Simon settling old scores with The Baltimore Sun as Simon obviously was.

As I watched this episode, I wondered if maybe it was meant to be a backdoor pilot.  Actually, I guess it would count as two backdoor pilots in one.  It’s easy to imagine a show about Elizabeth Wu covering the news in small town Maryland.  It’s also easy to imagine a show about Kellerman’s brothers getting into trouble in Florida.

As it is, this episode doesn’t really feel like Homicide.  It’s a rare misfire.

Brad reviews FELON (2008), starring Stephen Dorff and Val Kilmer. 


FELON is a movie that caught my attention when I was scrolling through Val Kilmer’s filmography on IMDB. I was looking for a movie and performance that seemed worthy of his talents, and this one stood out to me based on its high rating. It was directed by Ric Roman Waugh, who has helmed several solid Gerard Butler films over the last decade, including ANGEL HAS FALLEN (2019), GREENLAND (2020), and KANDAHAR (2023). I decided to go ahead and check it out on a lazy, and hot, Sunday afternoon in Arkansas. 

Stephen Dorff stars as Wade Porter, a man whose life takes a serious turn when he kills a burglar who has broken into his home. He’s sentenced to 3 years in prison for manslaughter and soon learns just how difficult it is to survive in prison. In what may be the best performance of his career, Dorff’s transformation from business-minded family man to brutal, prison survivor is incredible. As hard as he becomes, you never stop seeing the decent man trapped beneath the hardened exterior that prison forces on him. Val Kilmer plays John Smith, a mysterious lifer whose emotional scars and wisdom prove invaluable to Porter’s survival. While Smith may never go down as one of Kilmer’s most well-known characters, he gives an excellent, understated performance that proved he could still command the screen.

After looking through the IMDB profile for FELON, I expected a gritty prison drama with plenty of violence. You do get that, but I was surprised by how much the film affected me emotionally. This movie sets up a scenario that proves how quickly an ordinary guy’s life can be destroyed by one difficult situation, and then how hard it is to hold on to your humanity when your new world is completely built on violence. 

Director Waugh is able to keep the stakes high from the very beginning of the film to its end. Porter not only has to fight with all he has to survive behind the walls of the prison, but he also has to do whatever he can to to hold his family together, especially when it looks like his wife Laura (Marisol Nichols) is going to divorce him. There is a lot of violence behind the prison walls, but it feels ugly rather than entertaining, which adds meaning and a layer of depth to the film. I want to shout out Harold Perrineau, who I know from the TV series LOST. He is absolutely chilling as the evil prison lieutenant Jackson, who lost his own humanity years earlier and who now treats inmates as nothing more than pawns in his own ugly game. His performance is especially affecting when coupled with Dorff’s decent character. 

Val Kilmer put his name on a lot of movies later in his career that aren’t that great. FELON isn’t a classic, but it’s a very strong film. After enjoying their work together in THUNDERHEART, I really enjoyed seeing Kilmer work again with Sam Shepard, who plays his last remaining friend here. It’s a wonderful bonus for a low budget film from 2008. What stayed with me most, though, is the film’s reminder that justice and fairness aren’t always the same thing. Wade goes to prison wanting to quietly serve his time so he can move on with his life, but he quickly learns that survival often depends on abandoning the ideals that allow him to be a man of integrity in the real world. It’s a somewhat unsettling thought that has stuck with me after the movie ended. 

FELON is a film that’s probably never received the attention it deserved, but it’s a good prison drama. Anchored by excellent performances from Stephen Dorff and Val Kilmer, it provides an emotionally compelling story that’s well worth a watch. If you’re a fan of Val Kilmer like I am, this one’s a forgotten gem! 


Scenes That I Love: Putting On The Ritz From Young Frankenstein (Happy Birthday, Mel Brooks!)


Today, Mel Brooks is 100 years old!

Mel Brooks.  What can you say Mel Brooks?  Not only did he help to redefine American comedy but he was also responsible for bringing David Lynch to Hollywood.  Brooks was the one who hired Lynch to direct The Elephant Man.  It can probably be argued that, if not for Brooks, Lynch’s feature film career would have begun and ended with Eraserhead.  Brooks not only hired Lynch but also protected him for studio interference.  When the execs tried to make Lynch remove two surrealistic sequences from The Elephant Man, Brooks stood up to them.  When they requested a more conventional biopic, Brooks defended Lynch’s vision and the result was one of the best films ever made.

Of course, Brooks isn’t listed in the credits of The Elephant Man.  Though he produced the film, he went uncredited because he didn’t want people to assume that the movie was a comedy.  By doing so, Brooks missed out on an Oscar nomination but he also ensured that the film was taken seriously.  It’s hard not to respect someone who was willing to go uncredited to help make the film a success.

Though Brooks, as a producer, was responsible for a number of serious films, there’s a reason why Brooks is associated with comedy.  He’s a very funny man and he directed some very funny films.  In honor of Mel Brooks, here’s a scene that I love from 1974’s Young Frankenstein.

Happy birthday, Mel Brooks!

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Mel Brooks Edition


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking.

Mel Brooks is 100!  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Mel Brooks Films

Blazing Saddles (1974, dir by Mel Brooks, DP: Joseph Biroc)

Young Frankenstein (1974, dir by Mel Brooks, DP: Gerald Hirschfeld)

High Anxiety (1977, dir by Mel Books. DP: Paul Lohmann)

Spaceballs (1987, dir by Mel Brooks, DP: Nick McLean)

Music Video of the Day: Heart and Soul by Huey Lewis & The News (1983, directed by David Rathod)


It doesn’t get more 80s than Huey Lewis and The News.  In this video, we discover that even Huey sometimes feels out of place.  The woman who catches Huey’s eye is played by actress Signy Coleman.

Director David Rathod also did the video for I Want A New Drug.

Enjoy!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell 2.8 “Miss Bayside”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Screech is a pawn yet again.

Episode 2.8 “Miss Bayside”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on October 27th, 1990)

It’s time for the annnual Miss Bayside pageant!

Jessie considers Miss Bayside to be sexist and she tries to organize a boycott.  Lisa says “No way.”  She wants to be Miss Bayside.  Lisa enters and so does Kelly because Kelly’s family is poor and she could really use the extra money that comes from being a beauty queen.  Finally, Jessie goes against her pledge not to compete and enters because she wants to teach everyone about inner beauty.

Zack bets Slater that he can make anyone into the next Miss Bayside.  Slater takes the bet on the condition that he get to pick the person.  And, of course, Slater picks Screech….

Oh, this episode.  When I talk about Dustin Diamond being too young to be on this show, this is the sort of epiosde that I’m talking about.  While Lisa, Jessie, Kelly, and eventually Slater all come across as being confident and happy while competing for the title of Miss Bayside, Screech looks awkward, embarrassed, and almost troll-like.  I’m not even a Screech fan (or a Dustin Diamond fan for that matter, God rest his soul) but even I felt bad for him when he walked out on stage in a 1920s-style bathing suit.  While everyone else on the episode was obviously closer to adulthood than childhood (i.e. Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Tiffani Thiessen were both 16, and Elizabeth Berkley and Mario Lopez were both 17), Dustin Diamond was 13 and looked even younger.  That gives this entire episode a bit of an icky feel.

Screech does win the pageant.  He wins because his robot, Kevin, accidentally gives him a black eye and Zack tells everyone that Slater did it.  Screech gets the sympathy vote.  Sorry, Lisa.  Your dreams don’t matter.  Sorry, Kelly.  I guess you’re never going to be able to afford college.  The importnat thing is that Screech won something that is definitely not going to lead to him being taunted later in life.

Other than Screech’s victory, this episode is remembered for two things.  First, Slater absolutely kills it when he plays the drums during the talent competition.  Secondly, Mr. Belding sings the Miss Bayside song.  Isn’t she he lovely/not even a girl….  It must be said that, judging from this episode, Belding has a terrible singing voice but at least he tries.

Slater should have been Miss Bayside.  We all know it.

Villain of the Day: Judge Holden (Blood Meridian)


“War was always here. Before man was, war waited for him. The ultimate trade awaiting its ultimate practitioner.” — Judge Holden

In Cormac McCarthy’s masterpiece Blood Meridian, Judge Holden stands as one of the most terrifying, yet utterly magnetic figures in American literature. He is not a conventional villain driven by simple greed or revenge; instead, he operates on a cosmic, almost mythological scale. McCarthy crafts the Judge as an massive, albino entity who is completely devoid of hair, yet possesses an uncanny, childlike smoothness. This striking physical presence combines with an immense intellect, making him instantly unforgettable. He dominates every scene he enters, holding both the Glanton gang and the reader captive under his dark, philosophical spell.

At the core of Holden’s hypnotic presence is his utterly arresting physicality. Described as a massive, hairless, albino giant, he possesses an otherworldly appearance that immediately commands both reverence and dread. Yet, this grotesque physical power is contrasted with a startling, almost delicate grace. McCarthy frequently depicts the judge dancing, his enormous frame moving with an effortless, ethereal fluidity that borders on the supernatural. This juxtaposition—a gargantuan, impossibly strong killer who moves like a dancer and possesses the pale, unmarked skin of a newborn—creates a profound cognitive dissonance. He is simultaneously repulsive and fascinating, a living paradox that draws the eye and refuses to let it go.

The Judge also remains mesmerizing because McCarthy refuses to explain him. We never receive a tragic backstory or psychological diagnosis that neatly explains why he is the way he is. In fact, the mystery is the point. Throughout Blood Meridian, Holden often feels less like a man and more like a supernatural force wearing human skin. Different readers have interpreted him as the Devil, a gnostic archon, the embodiment of Manifest Destiny, the spirit of war itself, or simply humanity stripped of every moral restraint. McCarthy never confirms any of those theories, allowing the character to exist in a space between realism and myth. That ambiguity makes Holden endlessly discussable because every rereading invites another interpretation without ever exhausting the possibilities.

Another reason Judge Holden has endured as one of literature’s greatest villains is that he represents ideas rather than merely serving as an obstacle for the protagonist. The Kid spends much of the novel drifting through a world consumed by brutality, but the Judge continually tests him, almost as though he is trying to prove that compassion has no place in existence. Holden’s obsession with domination extends beyond physical violence. He wants mastery over knowledge, nature, history, and ultimately other people’s souls. His habit of sketching artifacts before destroying them reflects this desire for absolute ownership; if something exists outside his understanding or control, he cannot tolerate it. That makes him terrifying in a way that extends beyond the novel’s bloodshed. He embodies the frightening notion that intelligence, eloquence, and culture offer no protection against evil when they become tools for domination instead of wisdom.

Ultimately, Judge Holden’s charisma lies in the fact that he forces readers to confront a deeply uncomfortable idea: that there may be a coherent, even seductive logic to nihilism and destruction. He is not a cartoon villain driven by petty grievance; he is a fully realized intelligence that has looked at the human condition and arrived at monstrous conclusions. Blood Meridian is not an easy novel, and the Judge is not an easy villain — he does not allow readers the comfort of simple condemnation. His eloquence, his energy, and his terrifying completeness as a character make him linger in the mind long after the final page. In a landscape already saturated with literary darkness, Judge Holden stands apart as one of the most profound and deeply disturbing figures ever committed to the page.

Villain of the Day

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 6/21/26 — 6/27/28


Bands of Enchantment (PBS)

On Friday night, I watched a performance by the band Pacifica.  They were okay.  I prefer louder music.

Bring Me The Beauties: The Model Cult (HBOMax)

I watched this 3-part docuseries on Monday.  It was yet another cult documentary.  This time, only good-looking people could join the cult.  That actually made sense to me.  If you’re a cult leader, why would you want to be surrounded by ugly people?

Degrassi: The Next Generation (Tubi)

My review of this week’s episode will drop tomorrow.

Election Coverage

I watched this latest primary results on Tuesday.  Ugh, the DSA in New York.  Never has a group of activist been both so charmless and so successful at the same time.  A lot of people are panicking about that but, honestly, if the DSA was going to win anywhere, it was going to be in New York.  I imagine they’ll do well in Denver next week as well.  DSA appeals to gentrifiers.  (I also remember that the DSA insurgency was declared dead after the primaries in Illinois so perhaps we should be careful about reading too much into any one night.)  It seems like after every “wave election,” there’s a few new congresspeople (and even senators) who end up self-destructing during their first  or second term, people like Katie Hill, George Santos, Madison Cawthorn, Cori Bush, and Jamaal Bowman.  This year, I’m putting my money on Dairaliza Avila Chevalier and, if he wins, Graham Platner as being the most likely to fall apart as soon as they arrive in Washington.

Homicide: Life On The Street (Peacock)

My review of this week’s episode will drop tomorrow.

Saved By The Bell (Tubi)

My review of this weeks episode will drop later tonight.

Watched and Reviewed:

  1. 1st & Ten,
  2. Baywatch,
  3. CHiPs,
  4. Crime Story,
  5. Decoy,
  6. Freddy’s Nightmares,
  7. Hunter,
  8. The Love Boat,
  9. Pacific Blue,
  10. Saved By The Bell: The New Class,
  11. St. Elsewhere