Michael Worth | Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

It’s time for another stupid trip to L.A.

Episode 4.5 “Overkill”

(Dir by Sara Rose, originally aired on August 23rd, 1998)

Jamie is learning martial arts from Master Soo Han (Yoshi Jenkins). When she is saved from a group of muggers by a fellow classmate named Kyle (Matty Liu), she starts to fall in love with him. Soon, he is teaching her how to be a better fighter. For some reason, Jamie doesn’t tell Kyle that she’s a cop. That makes things awkward when Kyle realizes that 1) the man who killed his mother is a student in the class and 2) Kyle is being groomed to be a government assassin.

I’ve always said that you can tell when a show has cast a professional athlete in a guest role because the athlete is always the worst actor in the episode. That was certainly the case here. At first, I was sure that Matty Liu was a professional martial artist. It turns out that he’s actually a pro surfer but still, my point stands. It doesn’t matter how many camera tricks or jump cuts the show uses to make Liu look like a badass, he’s still an amazingly stiff actor. The scenes of him and Jamie falling in love don’t work because he’s not capable of showing any emotion, let alone love.

Speaking of love, Chris is still mad that her husband didn’t select her to be promoted to sergeant. When she discovers a murder victim, she impresses Homicide Detective Thomas (Carl T. Evans) by figuring out that the victim died from a — wait for it — broken neck. WOW! Amazing deduction, Chris! I mean, how difficult is it to spot a broken neck? Even though Chris is neither a medical examiner nor a detective, Thomas invites her to fill in for a sick Homicide detective. Chris accepts.

TC’s not happy about that! Actually, TC’s never happy. He’s been in charge of Pacific Blue for five episodes now and he hasn’t smiled once. He has spent a lot of time glaring. In fact, both he and Cory spend most of their time glaring at other people now. I guess that’s what you do when you’re in charge, management by glaring.

Finally, Bobby and Spazz compete over — wait a minute, I got a name wrong there. What is Spazz’s real name? Is it Granger? Yeah, okay, sorry about that. Bobby and Granger serve as body guards for a French actress (Lydie Denier), who claims that she’s being stalked. Bobby has seen all of her films but she’s more attracted to Spazz, for some reason. Sorry, Bobby! I would have picked you.

Anyway, this was one of Pacific Blue’s dumbest episodes yet. Chris is even more whiny than usual. TC and Cory are useless. Jamie and Kyle’s fight scenes are edited in such a way that one gets dizzy trying to follow them. This episode featured bad acting and worst direction, No wonder Chris wants to transfer to Homicide.

The girl on the back cover of the VHS box is only in the film for 5 seconds.

Danny Davis (Michael Worth) is the light heavyweight kickboxing champion of Ohio but he wants to be the national champion so he approaches Nick Taylor (Lorenzo Lamas) for training. Nick used to be the national champion but he is still haunted by his brutal defeat at the hands and feet of Jack Gerard (Jeff Langton). Nick is now an alcoholic who makes his money on the oil wrestling circuit. (The girls wrestle in oil while Nick kickboxes in a ring. Guess what most of the people in the bar end up watching?) When Danny and Nick first meet, the arrogant Nick refuses to have anything to do with him. But when Nick sees Danny win his match and shout out, “I am invincible!,” Nick decides to take him under his wing. The kid’s good but he needs to learn some lessons about making potentially ironic declarations in the ring.

Nick trains Danny and shows him that all of his talent won’t mean anything if he allows himself to become predictable. Soon, Nick and Danny are making the national circuit and fighting in Las Vegas. But as Danny becomes successful, Nick starts to grow jealous. He starts to feel as if his girlfriend, Maggie (the incredible Kathleen Kinmont), prefers Danny to him and he becomes so insecure that he can’t even perform long enough to cheat with a local prostitute that he picks up in a bar. Making matters worse is that, for Danny to become the champ, he’s going to have to defeat Jake Gerard, the man who ended Nick’s professional career.

Occasionally, late night Cinemax took a break from showing nudity-filled neo-noirs to show films like this one, a low-budget rip-off of Rocky, The Karate Kid, and Kickboxer. Of all the films that came out of this very 90s genre, Final Impact is one of the better examples. The fight scenes are exciting but the real appeal of this film is that it stars Lorenzo Lamas and Kathleen Kinmont, back when they were still a couple. Kinmont was one of the best of the 90s video vixens, beautiful and not a bad actress either. Meanwhile, Lorenzo Lamas was the male Shannon Tweed. Lamas may not have been a great actor but his total lack of shame and his ability to deliver deadpan dialogue like, “No one is invincible,” without cracking a smile made him more entertaining than many of his fellow direct-to-video stars. Lamas lurches drunkenly through Final Impact, taking both himself and the movie far too seriously and playing Nick’s emotional breakdown like an actor begging the Academy to just take a look. It’s fun to watch.

Final Impact ends as these films always do, with a champion being crowned. As far as I’m concerned, everyone in the film is champion, a champion of 90s Cinemax.