Film Review: The Wall (dir by Doug Liman)

Posted on September 13, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The Wall tells a very simple story.

Opening with a title card that informs us that “President Bush has declared victory,” The Wall takes place in Iraq in 2007. Two soldiers — a sniper named Matthews (John Cena) and a spotter named Isaac (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) — have responded to a call for help that came from a pipeline construction site. When they arrive, they see only dead contractors. Matthews and Isaac spend a day watching the site, finally determining that it is safe to investigate.

Of course, as soon as Matthews approaches the site, shots ring out as a sniper opens fire on him. Matthews falls while Isaac finds himself trapped behind a crumbling wall, shot in the right knee and slowly bleeding out. As Isaac tends to his wound and tries to determine whether Matthews is alive or dead, his radio comes to life. The voice, on the other end, initially claims to be an American soldier but Isaac eventually figures out that the voice actually belongs to the man who just shot him. The sniper is an Iraqi who calls himself Juba. He may or may not be a legendary and feared sniper that Matthews and Isaac were discussing mere minutes before being attacked.

And that’s pretty much the entire film right there. For 81 minutes, Isaac tries not to die while Juba alternates between taunting him and demanding to know why he and the American forces have yet to leave Iraq. Isaac claims that America is rebuilding Iraq. Juba claims that the wall that Isaac is hiding behind used to be a part of a school. Isaac tells Juba to fuck off. Juba replies, “We are not so different, you and me,” revealing that, if nothing else, Al Qaeda snipers apparently appreciate a good cliché. If anything, it reminded me a bit of The Shallows, except Blake Lively was now a soldier and the shark refused to stop talking.

I have to admit that I have mixed feelings about The Wall.

On the one hand, it’s a very well-made film. Visually, the film captures the deadly heat of the desert and it makes good use of its limited setting. It’s far more watchable than any movie that exclusively takes place behind a crumbling wall has any right to be. From what I’ve read, it appears that The Wall‘s depiction of both combat and dying is fairly accurate and the film does a good job of putting you in Isaac’s boots, forcing you to try to desperately figure out where Juba could be hiding.

Also, Aaron Taylor-Johnson actually gives a good performance. Since, with a few notable exceptions, Aaron Taylor-Johnon usually bores me to tears, I was shocked to see how good of a performance he gave as the country-accented Isaac. It’s especially impressive since he’s on screen for almost the entire film. It was hard for me to believe that the same actor who was so unbearably dull in Savages was suddenly so watchable in The Wall. However, he definitely was.

And yet, The Wall is also one of the most thoroughly unpleasant films that I’ve ever sat through. Admittedly, that’s probably the way it should be. War films shouldn’t be pleasant and I don’t think anyone could ever accuse The Wall of romanticizing combat. At the same time, the film itself doesn’t seem to be quite sure what it wants to say about war. Juba and Isaac do briefly debate America’s role in the Middle East but their discussion has all the depth of a twitter fight between Bernie Sanders supporter and a Donald Trump voter. Neither Isaac nor Juba are particularly deep thinkers. They’re both fighting and potentially dying for the benefit of others. Maybe that’s the point. The problem is that the film itself doesn’t seem to be quite sure.

The Wall is one of those films where I respect the craftsmanship behind it while, at the same time, having no desire to ever sit through it again.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #169: My Baby Is Gone! (dir by Steve Bacic)

Posted on September 10, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last Monday, I watched the Lifetime premiere movie, My Baby Is Gone! I should have reviewed it on Tuesday but, to be honest, I spent all of last week trying to figure out if Carrie was actually Laura Palmer and if Dale Cooper ever actually escaped the Black Lodge or not. So, this review is a week late and for that, I apologize even though I think anyone who would require an apology is kind of a jerk.

Why Was I Watching It?

Seriously, what’s been going on with Lifetime lately? It used to be that every Saturday night saw the premiere of a new Lifetime film. Live tweeters across the country would look forward to every new Lifetime film. We transformed several of those films into trending topics. We did our part.

But, for some reason, this year has seen a different Lifetime. More often than not, Lifetime airs an old movie on Saturday and saves the premiere for Sunday. Sorry, Lifetime. I love you but if I have to choose between a new movie and Twin Peaks, Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, The Deuce, Big Brother, and almost everything else that I can watch on Sunday night, anything that Lifetime premieres on Sunday is probably going to end up sitting on my DVR for a while before I actually watch it.

However, My Baby is Gone! did not premiere on Sunday. It premiered on Labor Day, so, for the first time in what seemed like forever, I was actually able to watch and live tweet the movie as it aired. Seriously, Lifetime, get it together. Nobody wants to watch a Lifetime premiere on Sunday.

What Was It About?

Emily (Elisabeth Harnois) is 8 months pregnant. Her husband (Ryan S Williams) seems to be a good guy but he works too hard and sometimes, he misses Emily’s checkups. Her best friend (Nicole LaPlaca) is supportive but she also works with Emily’s husband so, of course, it’s reasonable to assume that they’re probably sleeping together. This is a Lifetime movie, after all. After you’ve seen enough Lifetime movies, you know there’s no way that men and women can ever just be co-workers.

(Unless, of course, they’re cops. In that case, they’re just ineffectual and inevitably end up arresting the wrong person.)

Luckily, someone new has moved in across the street! Kelly (Anna van Hooft) is super-friendly and helpful and — oh my God! — she’s eight months pregnant too! Kelly says that she’s just staying in the house until her aunt returns. What no one knows, of course, is that Kelly’s actually got her aunt tied up in the basement.

Oh, and it turns out that Kelly isn’t really pregnant, either. She’s just wearing a fake belly. It’s actually kind of obvious but, at first, everyone just takes Kelly at her word.

Soon, Kelly is drawing Emily away from her husband and her best friend. She even convinces Emily to decorate the nursery with flamingos instead of butterflies!

What could Kelly’s nefarious plan be?

What Worked?

Uhmm… I’m thinking about it…

Actually, I had a lot of fun live tweeting this film. My Baby is Gone! is one of those movies that literally brings out the best in a snarky audience. There’s just so many implausible developments and none of the characters are likely to be mistaken for a member of Mensa. It’s a fun movie to watch if you’re looking for an excuse to spend two hours wondering how people can be so stupid.

Anna Van Hooft did a great job as Kelly. If you’re going to play a character who is batshit crazy in a Lifetime film, you might as well go all out. When you’re in a movie with a title like My Baby is Gone!, the time for subtlety is over.

What Did Not Work?

Even by the standards of Lifetime, the plot was just too implausible to work. I mean, the whole fake belly thing was a lot more convincing when it used in A Deadly Adoption.

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

My favorite character was Pam (Amelia Burstyn), who was Emily’s doctor’s administrative assistant and who showed absolutely no hesitation about sharing the details of another patient’s visit. It may not have been the best example of professional ethics but sometimes, you have to break the rules.

Lessons Learned

Butterflies are better than flamingos.

Music Video of the Day: The Rat by Blanck Mass (2017, dir by John Marsden)

Posted on September 7, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Hi! Lisa here, with today’s music video of the day. The Rat is the latest video from Blanck Mass, the solo project of Fuck Buttons’s Benjamin John Power.

In this video, Benjamin John Power stares straight at the camera while riding through the It’s A Small World ride in Disneyland. He never blinks. He never betrays any emotion whatsoever. Around the 3:24 mark, there’s suddenly a brief shot of a bunch of maggots. All in all, it’s rather disconcerting but I really wouldn’t expect anything less from Blanck Mass.

I want to quote two possible interpretations that I’ve come across for this video. The first comes from Power himself. In a press release, Power stated:

“The video itself is a bit of fun and was filmed on a family vacation, but somehow I feel it represents discontent within a capitalist regime and a world full of sugar-coated shit.”

Meanwhile, on YouTube, Crimewaveddd offered up this reading of the video:

“we get it you’re attractive”

Personally, I think they both sound good!

Enjoy!

TV Review: Twin Peaks: The Return Part 18 (dir by David Lynch)

Posted on September 4, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The Twin Peaks finale, which began with Part 17, concludes with an episode that we’ll probably still be debating 25 years from now.

The Doppelganger sits in the waiting room of the Black Lodge and bursts into flame. MIKE (Al Strobel) uses the Doppelganger’s soul to create another Cooper (Kyle MacLachlan). One scene later, that Cooper is arriving at his home in Las Vegas, where he is embraced by Janey-E (Naomi Watts) and Sonny Jim (Pierce Gagnon).

In the woods outside Twin Peaks, the real Cooper leads Laura (Sheryl Lee) by the hand. Again, Laura vanishes and we hear the sound of her screaming.

Suddenly, we are again in the waiting room of the Black Lodge. Cooper sits in his chair. MIKE asks him, “Is it the future or the past?” Events from Parts One and Two repeat. Cooper again meets the Arm but this time the Arm asks him not if he remembers the Doppelganger but if he knows the story of the little girl who lived down the street. Again, Laura whispers in Cooper’s ear before being pulled away by an unseen force. Again, Leland (Ray Wise) tells Cooper to find Laura.

And, once again, Cooper starts to walk through the Black Lodge but this time, he finds a room that is full of dead trees. And in that room, Diane (Laura Dern) is waiting for him. “Is it you?” she asks him, “is it really you?” Cooper is shocked but happy to see Diane.

(Is it possible that, even after saving Laura Palmer and therefore eliminating the event that led to him going to Twin Peaks in the first place, Cooper still found himself trapped in the Black Lodge for 25 years? But now, instead of being sent to destroy his Doppelganger, could it be that Cooper has been allowed to leave specifically to track down Laura?)

In the next scene, Cooper and Diane are driving down a desert road. It looks like the same road in South Dakota where the Doppelganger crashed his car when Cooper previously escaped from the Black Lodge. It does not look like it’s anywhere near Odessa, Texas, which will become important shortly.

They pull over to the side of the road. “Exactly 430 miles,” Cooper says. Cooper gets out of the car. He looks at the power lines above. Remember — in the world of Twin Peaks, electricity is magic. Cooper gets back in the car and asks Diane to kiss him. “Once we cross,” he says, “it could all be different.”

They drive forward. Electricity crackles. Suddenly, they’re driving down a highway in the middle of the night. They pull into a motel and get a room. They make love, with Cooper telling Diane to keep the lights turned out and Diane placing her hands over Cooper’s face.

(It was around this time that I started to realize that a lot of unanswered questions — like what’s going on with Audrey and why Sarah Palmer can remove her face — were probably destined to remain unanswered.)

The next morning, Cooper wakes up in a room that appears to be different from the one that he fell asleep in. Diane is gone but there’s a letter on the nightstand. It is addressed to Richard and it is from Linda. Linda’s letter says that she’s leaving because, “I don’t recognize you anymore.”

(Remember during Part One, when the Giant told Cooper to remember Richard and Linda? I’m going to assume that, just as how Cooper was previously Dougie Jones, the “crossing over” that he and Diane did transformed them into Richard and Linda.)

Cooper leaves his motel and it’s a totally different motel from the one that we previously saw him checking into.

A city limits sign indicates that Cooper is in Odessa, Texas. (Lynch does not make my home state look very good in this episode but I’ll forgive him because he’s otherwise awesome.) As Cooper drives down the street, he sees a sign for Judy’s coffee shop–

JUDY!

Cooper pulls into the parking lot and enters Judy’s. He asks the waitress (Francesa Eastwood) if there’s another waitress who works there. She tells him that there is but it’s her day off. When a few rednecks in cowboy hats (really, David?) start to harass the waitress, Cooper beats them up and drops their guns in the deep fryer. Explaining that he’s with the FBI, Cooper asks for the other waitress’s address.

Cooper’s drives up to the waitress’s house. He sees that she has an electric poll (marked No. 6) outside of her house. When Cooper knocks on the door, it’s answered by Laura Palmer (Sheryl Lee)!

Except that she says that her name isn’t Laura Palmer. She insists that her name is Carrie Page and, when she hears that Cooper is FBI, she immediately asks, “Did you find him!?” Cooper tells her, “Your father’s name is Leland. Your mother’s name is Sarah.” When Carrie hears Sarah’s name, she appears to be momentarily shaken and asks. “What’s going on?” Cooper tells her that she is Laura Palmer and that she needs to come with him to Twin Peaks, Washington.

“D.C?” Carrie asks.

“State,” Cooper replies.

Carrie agrees to go up to Twin Peaks with him. Her willingness may have something to do with the dead man who is propped up on her couch.

Cooper and Carrie drive all the way from Texas to Washington State. That’s quite a long journey and, as I watched them slightly driving down yet another dark highway, I again resigned myself to the knowledge that the show would never reveal just why exactly Audrey was screaming in that white room.

Hey, Coop, I know you’re busy but remember Audrey?

(My theory is that, after raping her, the Doppelganger sent Audrey to the Black Lodge, and, just as he did to Diane, manufactured a replacement. But if Cooper saved Laura and the Doppelganger never entered our world, is Audrey in the Black Lodge? In fact, if Laura never died then Ben never had to sale the Ghostwood Estates to get an alibi, which means that he never pushed Audrey to become an environmental crusader and, hence, Audrey was probably not at the bank when the bomb went off.)

Finally, Cooper and Carrie reach Twin Peaks. They drive past the Double R. Carrie says she doesn’t recognize anything, not even the Palmer House.

Cooper and Carrie walk up to the house. (Rather sweetly, Cooper and Carrie hold hands as they approach.) What follows is Lynch at his creepiest, his best, and his most frustrating.

Alice Tremond was played the actual owner of the house that’s used for the exterior shots of the Palmer House.

When Cooper knocks on the door, it’s answered by the house’s owner, Alice Tremond. (Longtime fans of the show will recognize the Alice Tremond name as belonging to one of the inhabitants of the Black Lodge. However, Cooper never met Mrs. Tremond. Only Donna met her and her odd grandson.) Mrs. Tremond says that, as far as she knows, no one named Palmer has ever lived un the house. When asked, she says that she bought the house from Mrs. Chalfont, another Black Lodge inhabitant that Cooper never met.

Stunned, Cooper and Carrie walk away from the house.

“What year is this?” Cooper asks.

Carrie shrugs.

Suddenly, from inside the house, we hear Sarah Palmer’s voice. “Laura!”

Carrie screams. We hear a burst of static electricity and it appears that lights in the house go off. The screen fades to black.

The screaming fades. Again, we see Cooper’s passive face as Laura whispers in his ear.

End credits. Sheryl Lee is credited twice. Once for playing Laura Palmer. Once for playing Carrie Page.

And so it ends.

We’re going to spend years debating what all this means and I don’t want to say too much until I get chance to watch the entire series a second time. (I plan on watching all 18 hours next weekend.) It does appear that, no matter how much Cooper and Laura try to avoid it, all paths lead back to not only Twin Peaks but also to the unspeakable horror that occurred in the Palmer House. Much like Dana Andrews’s obsessive P.I. in the classic film noir, Laura, Cooper is obsessed with saving a dead woman.

I’ll write more on this later, after I’ve had time to rest. For now, I just want to thank everyone who has followed our Twin Peaks coverage here on the Shattered Lens. And thank you to Jeff, Leonard, and Ryan for contributing!

It’s a strange world, isn’t it?

Twin Peaks on TSL:

TV Review: Twin Peaks: The Return Part 16 (dir by David Lynch)

Posted on August 28, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Cooper’s back!

If you needed to sum up the latest episode of Twin Peaks: The Return in just two words, those would be the words to use. After spending 15 hours with just the Doppelganger and Dougie, it is so wonderful to finally have Dale Cooper back.

Tonight’s episode of Twin Peaks was the best since Part 8. In fact, I would rate Part 16 even higher than Part 8 because Part 16 shows that David Lynch is more than just a surrealist. He’s also a filmmaker with a heart. If you didn’t get emotional when Dale said, “I am the FBI,” then you have no feelings, it’s as simple as that. You’re a zombie or maybe you’re a doppelgänger yourself. As we learned tonight, there’s more of them out there than just evil old Mr. C.

Part 16 opens with the Doppelganger (Kyle MacLachlan) and Richard (Eamon Farren) driving at night. The Doppelganger pulls off to the side of a country road. He turns on his truck’s spotlights and shines them on a nearby rock. The Doppelganger and Richard get out of the truck. Richard asks why they’ve stopped. “Pay attention,” the Doppelganger replies, “and you’ll find out.”

The Doppelganger goes on to explain that he’s looking for “a place.” Three people have given him coordinates to the place. Two of the coordinates match. The Doppelganger says that the rock matches up with those two coordinates. The Doppelganger sends Richard to investigate the rock and, in a quite satisfying turn of events, Richard is electrocuted and violently killed. Bye bye, you douchebag.

“Goodbye, my son,” the Doppelganger says, confirming what we all suspected about Richard’s parentage.

Meanwhile, on a nearby hill, a stoned Jerry Horne (David Patrick Kelly) watches all of this play out. (Perhaps it’s because he was too far away or because he was too high but Jerry didn’t seem to notice that the man being electrocuted was his grandnephew.)

In Las Vegas, Chantal (Jennifer Jason Leigh) and Hutch (Tim Roth) are in a van, staking out Dougie’s house and waiting for a chance to assassinate him. As they watch, the FBI pulls up outside of the house. When Special Agent Headley (Jay R. Ferguson) knocks on the front door, no one answers. Needless to say, he’s not happy about that. As usual, he yells at Wilson (Owain Rhy-Davies). Poor Wilson.

The reason no one is home is because Dougie (Kyle MacLachlan) electrocuted himself during Part 15 and he’s now in a coma. Bushnell (Don Murray), Janey-E (Naomi Watts) and Sonny Jim (Pierce Gagnon) are all in his hospital room, looking over him. The Mitchum brothers (Jim Belushi and Robert Knepper) drop by, delivering flowers and finger sandwiches. They also announce that they’re going to go to Dougie’s house and drop off some food so that Janey-E doesn’t have to worry about cooking.

Meanwhile, Bushnell gets a call from the office, telling him that the FBI just came by and that they’re now heading to the hospital to see Dougie.

In front of Dougie’s house, Chantal and Hutch are still hiding out in the van and waiting for Dougie to show up. “It’s going to be a long day,” Hutch says. (Leigh and Roth make such an entertaining couple that you almost feel bad that they’re playing psychotic murderers.) They watch confused as the Mitchum Brothers and their entourage pull up to the house and drop off several trays of finger sandwiches.

Suddenly, a man pulls up behind the van. He’s driving a car that has “Zawaski Accounting” on the side of it. However, this guy doesn’t seem like your typical accountant. For one thing, he’s extremely angry about Chantal and Hutch parking in front of his driveway.

“GO FUCK YOURSELF!” Chantal yells.

The accountant gets back into his car and starts to ram the van. This really pisses off Chantal so she shoots the guy. However, the accountant has a gun of his own and shoots back. This leads to a violent shooutout, one that leaves Chantal and Hutch dead. The accountant surrenders to Agent Wilson, who was also staking out Dougie’s house.

Watching the fight from Dougie’s front porch, Bradley Mitchum wonders, “What the fuck type of neighborhood is this?”

“People are under a lot of stress, Bradley,” his brother explains.

Back at the hospital, Dougie suddenly wakes up. He sits up and he sees MIKE (Al Strobel) staring at him.

“You are awake?” MIKE asks.

“One hundred per cent,” Dougie replies in a confident and authoritative voice…

OH MY GOD, COOPER’S BACK!

“Finally,” MIKE says. MIKE goes on to explain that the Doppelganger is still out there. He hands Cooper the owl ring.

Cooper gives MIKE a strand of his hair and says, “I need you to make another one!” (I assume Cooper is telling MIKE to make another doppelganger.)

“I understand,” MIKE says before vanishing.

It quickly becomes apparent that Cooper really is 100% back. He is no longer blank-faced. He is no longer blandly repeating the last two words that he heard. Instead, he is back to being the talkative Cooper that we all know and love. After getting the doctor to “verify that my vitals are A-okay,” Cooper tells Bushnell that he’s a good man and tells Janey-E and Sonny Jim to go to the car.

(“Dad sure is talking a lot,” Sonny Jim says.)

Before leaving, Cooper is told that the FBI is looking for him. Cooper smiles and delivers the line of the episode: “I am the FBI.”

(Cooper also borrows Bushnell’s gun and calls the Mitchum Brothers, telling them that he’s going to need plane to Spokane, Washington.)

As Cooper, Janey-E, and Sonny Jim drive away from the hospital, the classic Twin Peaks theme music swells on the soundtrack, letting us know in no uncertain terms that Cooper is back and things are going to be okay.

In South Dakota, Diane (Laura Dern) gets a text from The Doppelganger. “: – ) All” As a distorted remix of Muddy Magnolias’s American Woman plays on the soundtrack, Diane takes the elevator up to Gordon’s room, where Gordon (David Lynch), Tammy (Chrysta Bell), and Albert (Miguel Ferrer) are all waiting for her.

In a scene featuring some of the most brilliant work of Laura Dern’s career, Diane tells them about the last night that she saw the Doppelganger. She reveals what the show had already heavily implied, that the last time she saw the Doppelganger, he raped her. Afterward, he took her to “some place like an old gas station.”

Suddenly, Diane says, “I’m in the sheriff’s station. I sent him those coordinates. I’m in the sheriff’s station because I’m … it’s not me.”

Diane pulls a gun from her purse, just to get shot by Tammy and Albert. Diane immediately vanishes.

“Wow,” Tammy says.

Suddenly, we’re in the waiting room of the Black Lodge. Diane sits in a chair. MIKE is across from her. MIKE tells her that she’s not real, that she was manufactured. “I know. Fuck you,” Diane says before her face disappears in a puff of black smoke.

At the casino, the Mitchum Brothers greet Cooper, Janey-E, and Sonny Jim. Cooper tells Janey-E and Sonny Jim that he loves them but that he has to go away. However, he promises that he will return. Even though Cooper is no longer Dougie, he still loves both of them. “We’re a family,” he says, “Dougie — I mean, I will be back.” Cooper reassures Sonny Jim that he is his dad, whether he’s Dougie or not. “I have to go but I’ll see you soon,” Cooper says, “I’ll walk through that red door and I’ll be home for good.”

Cooper leaves with the Mitchum Brothers. As they drive to the airport, the Mitchums ask Cooper if he really works for the FBI. Cooper says that he does. The Mitchums explain that they typically don’t get along with law enforcement. In a classic Cooper moment, Dale says, “I read you 100%. Friends, that’s about to change. I am a witness that you both have hearts of gold.” The Mitchums are touched.

At the Roadhouse, the MC (JR Starr) announces that the Roadhouse is proud to present Edward Louis Severson (Eddie Vedder, whose real name is Edward Louis Severson). As Vedder sings Out of Sand (which, no offense to you Eddie Vedder fans out there, is perhaps the most boring song ever to be performed at the Roadhouse), Audrey (Sherilyn Fenn) and Charlie (Clark Middleton) finally show up. They get a drink at the bar. Audrey raises a toast to Billy.

Suddenly, the MC announces: “And now … Audrey’s Dance!”

Everyone on the dance floor moves to the side, retreating to the shadows. The house band starts to play Audrey’s theme music from the original series. Audrey appears to go into a trance and she starts to do the same dance that, 25 years previously, she did at the Double R while everyone else in town was wondering who had killed Laura Palmer.

Suddenly, a fight breaks out in the Roadhouse. Two men are fighting over a woman named Monique. Audrey snaps out of her trance and runs off the dance floor. She goes to Charlie. “Get me out of here!” she says.

Suddenly, Audrey is in a white room, staring at herself in a mirror. “What!? What!?” she says as the mirror shakes…

And, for now, that’s where we leave things.

Oh my God, what a wonderful episode! Twin Peaks: The Return concludes next week. As much as I want to see where Lynch’s journey is going to lead, I am going to miss this show and its mysteries. After Twin Peaks: The Return ends, it’s going to be hard to just watching mere television.

Twin Peaks on TSL:

Music Video of the Day: Dancing With Myself by Billy Idol (1983, dir by Tobe Hooper)

Posted on August 28, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Hi! Lisa here, filling in for Val, with today’s music video of the day!

On Saturday night, fans of both film and horror were saddened to learn of the death of Tobe Hooper. Tobe Hooper was a Texas original, a fiercely iconoclastic director who totally changed the face of horror when he directed a low-budget shocker called The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

When it came time to pick today’s music video of the day, I decided to see if Tobe Hooper had ever directed a music video. It turned out that he directed exactly one and here it is:

According to almost everyone online, Dancing With Myself is a song about masturbation. However, Idol himself says that the song’s lyrics are actually meant to be quite literal. The song actually is about dancing with yourself. Here’s how it’s explained over on Songfacts:

“This song is commonly thought to be about masturbation, but it’s really more about dancing by yourself. Billy got the idea after watching Japanese kids at a Tokyo disco “dancing with themselves” in a nightclub. The kids would dance in a pogo style up and down, and there were mirrors in the club so they could watch themselves doing it… This song is about more than just dancing. Idol told Rolling Stone: “The song really is about people being in a disenfranchised world where they’re left bereft, dancing with their own reflections.”

As for how Tobe Hooper came to direct the video … well, I have no idea. I imagine he was hired because of his fame as the director of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. This video came out a year after the original Poltergeist, a film that Hooper is credited with directing but which many people believed was actually directed by producer Steven Spielberg. (Poltergeist was a huge hit but the rumors of Hooper being a director-in-name-only permanently and unfairly damaged Hooper’s reputation.) As far as I know, this is the only music video that Tobe Hooper directed.

As for the video, it features neither masturbation nor Japanese nightclubs. Instead, it appears to be taking place in a post-apocalyptic setting. The beginning of the video reminds me a bit of Hooper’s underrated slasher film, The Funhouse.

Anyway, enjoy!

32 Initial Thoughts on Twin Peaks: The Return Part 16 (dir by David Lynch)

Posted on August 27, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

As always, these are just the initial thoughts that I had when I first watched the episode. Later tonight or tomorrow, I will rewatch the episode and post a full recap!

Several friends and acquaintances have already told me that tonight’s episode is amazing. I can hardly wait to see what happened tonight.
These driving scenes always make me think of Lost Highway.
“I’m 25 years your senior…” You’re also his father, Doppelganger!
Agck! So much for Richard. To be honest, that’s the most satisfying Twin Peaks death so far.
I love watching Tim Roth and Jennifer Jason Leigh act opposite each other.
Poor Agent Wilson. Always getting yelled at.
The Mitchum Brothers are the nicest gangsters around.
“These are what you call finger sandwiches.”
I absolutely hate it when people park in front of my house so I totally related to the whole driveway scene.
Well, so much for Chantal and Hutch. It’s probably for the best. They were funny but psychotic.
OH MY GOD, COOPER’S BACK!
“Finally.” You got that right, one-armed man.
GODDAMMIT, COOPER’S BACK!
FINALLY, COOPER’S BACK!
I’d just like to point out that, if not for Sunset Boulevard, Cooper would still be Dougie. Thank you, Billy Wilder.
Oh, thank God — Cooper remembers everything that happened when he was Dougie. I was scared that, whenever Cooper returned, he would have to spend an episode or two getting caught up.
“I’m leaving.” You tell them, Cooper!
“I am the FBI.” And the classic Twin Peaks music playing in the background! I’m so happy right now.
Uh-oh … what does that text message mean? What is Diane about to do…
That is a remix of Muddy Magnolias’s American Woman playing as Diane rides up the elevator.
Let us take a moment to all agree that Laura Dern is brilliant.
Whoa! Where did Diane go!? Actually, I think I know where Diane went…
I was right. There’s Diane in the Black Lodge and … wait, she was manufactured? Oh my God…
So, if the Doppelganger manufactured Diane could that mean that maybe he manufactured Sarah Palmer as well? As you may remember, she did rip that guy’s throat out a few episodes ago…
Considering how indifferent I’ve been to him in the past, it’s amazing how much I love Jim Belushi in Twin Peaks.
Awwwwww! “We’re a family.” Kyle MacLachlan is a great actor.
“I am witness to the fact that you both have hearts of gold…” Awwwww!
Edward Louis Severson is, of course, Eddie Vedder’s real name.
Audrey and Charlie finally made it to the Roadhouse.
“Ladies and gentlemen … Audrey’s dance…” Is the Roadhouse the Black Lodge? It would explain a lot…
Oh my God, Audrey’s in the Black Lodge!
This was a great episode and I can’t wait to rewatch it. I can’t believe that it all ends next week.

Twin Peaks on TSL:

The Things You Find On Netflix: To The Bone (dir by Marti Noxon)

Posted on August 26, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Way back in January, when I first heard about To The Bone, I had high hopes for it.

After all, To The Bone was the directorial debut of Marti Noxon, who is well-known both for her work on Buffy the Vampire Slayer and for co-creating Unreal. To The Bone was reportedly based on Noxon’s own struggle with an eating disorder and it was said to feature an outstanding lead performance from Lily Collins as an artist struggling with anorexia. Even the casting of Keanu Reeves as a doctor sounded intriguing.

And, to me, it didn’t matter that To The Bone got mixed reviews at Sundance. Who would seriously expect critics, especially male critics, to understand a movie about body issues and eating disorders? When I heard that To The Bone had been purchased by Netflix, I did sigh a little. Far too often, Netflix is where good films end up getting lost in a sea of mediocre offering. But then again, perhaps To The Bone was exactly the type of intimate character study that would actually benefit from being viewed on a small screen. After all, it’s not a film about a bunch of space lizard attacking the great wall of China. It’s a film about a young woman struggling with an eating disorder.

When Netflix finally released To The Bone back in July, I was excited.

Then I actually watched the movie.

To The Bone actually gets off to a pretty good start. The first 20 minutes or so are dedicated to establishing who Ellie (Lily Collins) is. She’s 20 years old. She’s smart. She’s sarcastic. She’s an artist. She’s a college dropout who apparently used to have a very popular tumblr that dealt with being thin. She’s also anorexic and, from the first minute that we see her, Ellie looks like she’s on the verge of death. (To the film’s credit, it makes clear that there is a huge difference between being naturally thin and being anorexic. That’s a distinction that is far too often overlooked.) We meet Ellie’s dysfunctional family: her frustrated stepmother (Carrie Preston), the father who often can’t be bothered, and the half-sister (Liana Liberato) who both loves and resents her. The relationship between the two sisters is especially well-handled. Even if it takes a while to get used to Keanu Reeves playing a compassionate but tough-talking doctor, the film still works during his first few scenes.

Then, Ellie joins Reeves’s inpatient program and moved into a house with six other patients and this is where the film started to annoy me. Ellie is such a well-drawn and well-acted character that it makes it all the more obvious that the rest of the patients are not. Instead, the rest of the patients are all easily identifiable types. As soon as they show up on screen, you know everything about them and you know exactly what is going to happen to each and every one of them. From the minute that Ellie reluctantly steps into that house, To The Bone starts to feel less like an honest look at anorexia and more like a well-meaning and predictable PSA. One of the patients is pregnant and always talk about how worried she is that her eating disorder is going to lead to her losing the baby. Can you guess what happens?

And then there’s Luke (Alex Sharp). Luke is the ballet dancer who is recovering from a knee injury. As soon as I saw that Luke was the only male in the house, I knew that he was destined to eventually declare his love for Ellie. But my problem with Luke has less to do with his predictable character arc and more to do with just how annoying a character he is. Luke is relentlessly upbeat. Luke constantly tells corny jokes. Luke just will not stop talking! When Luke leaves a room, he starts singing a song called Sugar Blues. When Luke reenters a room, he is still singing Sugar Blues. SHUT UP, LUKE!

(Whenever Ellie would visit Luke in his room, I would find myself distracted by the posters on his wall. The majority of them said “Jazz Festival” and featured some saxophone clipart. As strange as it may sound, it really started to annoy me that there was no date or location listed. Why would you go through all the trouble of making — or buying, for that matter — a poster for a jazz festival and then not bother to include a date or a location? That may sound like a minor thing but, as I watched the film, that inauthentic poster came to represent everything that felt inauthentic about Luke as a character.)

I guess the main problem with To The Bone is that it never succeeds in convincing us that the inpatient program is actually going to do any good for Ellie. It’s not for lack of trying. However, the scenes in the house are too overwrought and predictably scripted. There’s a scene where Reeves takes the patients on a field trip and it’s supposed to be inspiring but it doesn’t work because, as a first-time director, Noxon doesn’t trust her material enough to allow us to draw our own conclusions. Instead, she beats us over the head with her message. For To The Bone to work, it needed a director like Andrea Arnold, someone who specializes in a naturalistic performances and who is willing to embrace ambiguity and take the time to let a scene play out. Noxon makes the mistake of not trusting her audience to draw the right conclusion and, as a result, To The Bone goes from being an intriguing character study to being the cinematic equivalent of the last 15 minutes of an episode of Intervention.

Though it all, Lily Collins continues to give a good performance. Even when she’s forced to deliver some unfortunate dialogue, she’s the best thing about To The Bone. Unfortunately, the rest of this movie just collapses around her.

Jazz Festival

Playing Catch-Up: The Great Wall (dir by Zhang Yimou)

Posted on August 26, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Remember The Great Wall?

The Great Wall came out in February. Before it was released, I saw the trailer and I thought, “Well, that looks like it might be fun.” However, I never actually saw the film when it was in theaters. I think I was still recovering from Fifty Shades Darker when The Great Wall was released so I put off going to see it. I thought to myself, “That’ll be around for a while.” Of course, I was wrong. The Great Wall played for two weeks and then it was gone.

That may not sound like a big deal when you consider the reviews that The Great Wall received. If not for the fact that Fifty Shades Darker was released a week earlier, The Great Wall would have been the first critical disaster of 2017. Seriously, the critics hated The Great Wall with a passion that took even me by surprise. The comments went beyond the usual snarkiness to outright hatred. Suddenly, The Great Wall — which, to judge from the trailer, looked like a harmless little monster movie — was being held up as an example of everything wrong with modern filmmaking.

The film was even attacked for starring Matt Damon. As I said before, I thought the trailer looked like fun but, apparently, other critics watched that trailer and found themselves asking, “How dare Matt Damon appear in a movie that’s set in eleventh century China!?” And you know what? I get it. Whenever I’m watching a movie about aliens invading the 11th Century, my immediate concern is whether or not the film is historically accurate. It’s bad enough that Americans are being taught that Matt Damon could survive on Mars. Do they also have to be told that Matt Damon saved China from the space lizards!?

Even though I missed The Great Wall when it was playing in theaters, I knew that it was a film that I would see eventually. Whenever a film gets totally slaughtered by the critics, I feel like I have almost a duty to watch the film and judge for myself. Some of that’s because I don’t trust the majority of critics. And some of it’s because, as a natural born contrarian, I’m always hopeful for any chance to go against the consensus. Last month, I finally watched The Great Wall and you know what?

It’s not that bad.

Now, it should be understood that being not that bad doesn’t necessarily mean that The Great Wall is a good movie. It’s a deeply silly movie and, occasionally, it’s also a profoundly dumb one. Matt Damon plays a European mercenary who is sneaking around China, searching for gunpowder. After he is captured by the Chinese and brought to the Great Wall, he is enlisted to help battle a bunch of space lizards. Apparently, the space lizards attack the wall every 60 years but, this year, they’re arriving early. Or something like that. I really couldn’t follow the mythology of the space lizards and that’s probably for the best. The Great Wall is not a film that demands or benefits from a good deal of deep thought. This is one of those films where the best plan is to not ask too many questions because the answers probably won’t make any sense anyway.

As dumb as The Great Wall may be, it’s an undeniably entertaining movie. Under the direction of Zhang Yimou, The Great Wall is a visual feast, full of epic landscapes and swooping cameras. When a seemingly limitless number of space lizards appear out of nowhere and suddenly charge the wall, it’s impossible not to get caught up in the exciting silliness of it all. When the Chinese army takes their positions on the Great Wall and prepare to repel the invasion, it doesn’t matter that none of the characters are particularly fleshed out. Instead, you’re just overwhelmed by the vibrant colors of their armor and the determined fierceness of their expressions. The Great Wall is shamelessly over the top and nicely self-aware. This a movie that knows that it is ludicrous and occasionally incoherent and you know what? The Great Wall is perfectly fine with that.

For all the criticism that he received for appearing in the movie, Matt Damon is ideally cast. Whenever Damon is on screen, it’s as if he’s entered into a conspiracy with the viewer. Matt Damon is one of the few actors who can maintain his balance while walking that thin line between drama and parody. With every arched eyebrow and slightly sarcastic line reading, Damon is saying, “Sure, this is all kind of stupid. But aren’t we having fun?”

When The Great Wall eventually shows up on the SyFy channel, it’s going to be fun movie to live tweet. Some films were just meant to be watched and appreciated with a group of your snarkiest friends. The Great Wall is one such film.

Scene That I Love: The End of the World from Lars Von Trier’s Melancholia

Posted on August 21, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Over the past few years, there’s been many movies about the end of the world.

A lot of them have been pretty bad. I never did find the high heel that I threw at the screen while watching Seeking A Friend For The End Of The World.

And some of them have been pretty good. Dawn of the Planet of the Apes and its sequels come to mind.

And then there’s Lars Von Trier’s Melancholia. Von Trier is always going to be controversial filmmaker but no one has ever matched his brilliance when it came to capturing the end of existence. In Melancholia, a depressed woman (played in a revelatory performance by Kristen Dunst) finds unexpected strength in the end of the world. As can be seen in the scene below, it’s a beautifully sad film, one that ends on a note of triumphant apocalypse: