As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasionally Mastodon. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We snark our way through it.
Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 1989’s Shocking Dark!
If you want to join this watch party, just hop onto Mastodon, pull up Shocking Dark on YouTube, start the movie at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi: The Next Generation, which aired from 2001 to 2015! The series can be streamed on YouTube and Tubi.
This week, Ellie figures something out about Marco.
Episode 2.14 “Careless Whisper”
(Dir by Laurie Lynd, originally aired on January 13th, 2003)
This episode opens with Marco, Jimmy, and Spinner playing basketball and Marco staring at the shirtless Spinner until Spinner says, “What are you looking at, fag?”
Later, when Dr. Sally (Sue Johanson) comes to give the Health class her annual sex education talk, Jimmy and Spinner ask her how a dude could be attracted to another dude. At this point, someone in the class could have and perhaps should have pointed out that Jimmy and Spinner seem to spend a lot of time together but instead, everyone just snickers.
Everyone except for Marco. As class ends, Marco is quick to tell Spinner and Jimmy that he hates gay people.
Meanwhile, Ellis is wondering why Marco never seems to show her any affection. They’re hanging out. They’re going to the movies. And yet, she feels like Marco is still more of a friend than a boyfriend….
Yes, this is the episode where Ellie figures out that Marco is gay. When Ellie asks him, “Do you like girls at all?,” Marco replies with, “I don’t know.” As we all yell, “No, Ellie!,” Ellie agrees to continue to pretend to be Marco’s girlfriend so that Spinner and Jimmy won’t make fun of him but she says that this isn’t a permanent arrangement….
Seriously, Ellie was always getting her heart broken on this show. First, she agreed to be Marco’s pretend girlfriend. Then she dated Sean, even though he was obviously still in love with Emma. Then she pursued Craig, who was incapable of loving anyone other than himself. And finally, she fell for that narcissistic college newspaper editor. Ellie deserved better and really, while I have sympathy for Marco’s struggle to accept his sexuality while being best friends with the two biggest homophobes in Canada, Marco was always at his most selfish when it came to Ellie.
That said, both Adamo Ruggiero and Stacey Farber give good performances in this episode, as Marco and Ellis respectively. Today, we kind of take it for granted that every high school-based show is going to have at least a handful of gay characters. (By the end of Degrassi’s Netflix run, almost everyone in the school was LGBTQ.) In 2003, though, an extended storyline like this was still a big deal and it undoubtedly took some guts on the part of the showrunners.
As for the B-story, Toby is totally in love with Kendra. Kendra thinks that Toby is getting a bit too possessive. Toby agrees to back off a little. Kendra, you can do better. Sorry, Tobes.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC! It can be viewed on Peacock.
This week, Whit Stillman directs a story of pain and tragedy.
Episode 5.7 “The Heart of a Saturday Night”
(Dir by Whit Stillman, originally aired on November 15th, 1995)
The Heart of a Saturday Night is a great episode of Homicide, with the exception of one decision that annoyed the Hell out of me.
It’s an experimental episode. We watch as the Homicide detectives work three cases — a carjacking the results in the death of a wife and mother, a bar fight at the Waterfront that results in the death of an alcoholic husband, and the assault and murder of a young woman in East Baltimore. While Bayliss, Giardello, Munch, and Lewis investigate the cases, we see the survivors at a group therapy meeting. Rosanna Arquette plays the widow of the man killed in the bar fight. The great Chris Eigeman is the widower of the carjacking victim. Polly Holliday and Tom Quinn play the parents of the murdered woman.
It’s a bit stagey and talky but it works, largely due to the performances of the guest cast and the intelligent direction of Whit Stillman. As anyone who has seen any of his films can attest, Stillman is unusually skilled at making conversation compelling. It’s a powerful episode because it reminds us that while the Homicide detectives are just doing their job, the cases they investigate leave lasting scars on those left behind. Munch is more concerned with the murder at his bar than the carjacking to which he and Lewis have been assigned but Giardello explains that Munch cannot investigate a crime that occurred at a location that he owns. Giardello investigated the murder at the bar and one gets the feeling that he largely just wants to get out of the office. Lewis becomes obsessed with solving the carjacking but we all know eventually he’ll move on because that’s his job. There’s always going to be another murder. But for the victim’s husband, life is never going to be the same again. He’s angry and bitter, especially since he knows the carjackers will probably never be caught. (At the end of the episode, his wife’s name is the only one still in red on the board,) His words aren’t always pleasant but he has every right to be angry. Chris Eigeman’s performance is incredible and heart-breaking. Even more so than the effective but overwrought Bop Gun, this episode captured the pain of being a survivor.
It’s a powerful episode, up until the the moment that the final member of the therapy group shows up and it turns out to be Dr. Cox. As good as Michelle Forbes has been in the role, this is the third episode-in-a-row in which Cox suddenly takes center stage. It’s hard not to feel that the show is demanding that we love Dr. Cox as much as the writers obviously do. The problem is that this is only Dr. Cox’s third episode. The constant spotlight on Cox feels hamfisted and a bit premature. It reminds me of when The Office tried to make us embrace characters like Robert California and Nellie Bertram. (This is probably the only time in history that The Office and Homicide will ever be compared to each other.)
Other than the awkward inclusion of Dr. Cox at the end, this was a powerful episode. Homicide took a risk and, for the most part, it paid off.
Reb Brown, the star of some of the loudest movies ever made, will be turning 78 in four more days but I bet he could still beat the evil doers and encourage us all by shouting, “Go! Go! Go!” A former college football player turned actor, Reb Brown holds the distinction of being one of the first actors to play Captain America and for also starring in classic films like Yor Hunter of the Future, Strike Commando and Strike Commando 2. Though he may not have ever become a household name, Reb Brown is a beloved figure amongst my circle of film-loving friends.
The scene below is from 1988’s Space Mutiny and it featured Reb doing what Reb does best.
4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!
129 years ago, on this date, Douglas Sirk was born in Germany. He would start out his career as a stage director in Germany before coming to the United States in 1937. In the U.S., he made his mark as the director of a series of lushly visualized and often over-the-top melodramas. Never a critical favorite, Sirk was rediscovered and his reputation rehabilitated when film students and critics started to reexamine his work in the late 60s and the 70s. Once dismissed as the maker of tawdry (if popular) melodramas, Douglas Sirk is now seen as a subversive master of irony, one who used his melodramas to comment on American society. It’s fair to say that, without the films of Douglas Sirk, there would be no Lifetime today.
It’s time for….
4 Shots From 4 Douglas Sirk Films
Magnificent Obsession (1954, dir by Douglas Sirk, DP: Russell Metty)
All That Heaven Allows (1955, dir by Douglas Sirk, DP: Russell Metty)
Written on the Wind (1956, dir by Douglas Sirk, DP: Russell Metty)
Imitation of Life (1959, dir by Douglas Sirk, DP: Russell Metty)
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime and Tubi!
This week, we finish up the first season.
Episode 1.19 “Slater’s Friend”
(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 28th, 1992)
Who killed Artie?
That’s the question that Zack, Kelly, Jessie, Lisa, and Screech are left to consider when Slater’s pet chameleon Artie dies. Slater specifically asked them to take care of Artie while he was out of town. When Slater returns to Bayside, both Zack and the girls attempt to fool him with a duplicate chameleon because no one on this show ever just tells the truth. When Slater figures out that Artie is dead, he’s bitter and he’s angry and he even disrupts Coach Rizzo’s (Frankie Como) speech class. Belding, of all people, emerges as the hero, telling Slater that it’s okay to be sad. In the end, Artie is given a funeral and the cast sings Artie Boy.
This episode has long had a reputation for being the worst episode of Saved By The Bell. NBC was so embarrassed by it that they actually didn’t air it until four years after it was filmed. In his highly-suspect autobiography, Dustin Diamond claimed that everyone was trying not to laugh during the funeral scene.
Well, you know what? This episode — as silly as it is — kind of works. If you’ve ever lost a pet, you can relate to Slater’s grief. And really, Slater having a pet chameleon makes sense when you consider the fact that he spent his entire childhood traveling from one military base to another. It’s not like he could really own a cat or even a dog under those circumstances. A lizard on the other hand….
This episode is actually a good example of how good Mario Lopez actually was in the role of A.C. Slater. When Slater says, “It’s just a dead lizard,” your heart breaks for him. When he hugs Mr. Belding, you feel Slater’s pain. Even in an episode that ends with everyone singing a song about a chameleon, Mario Lopez gave it his all.
Worst episode ever? Not hardly! We’ve still got the Tori episodes to review, after all. In fact, my only complaint about this episode is that Coach Rizzo was never brought back. He was my favorite teacher at Bayside!
Another week, another special about boy bands. I watched this 3-hour, two-part documentary on Wednesday and Thursday. Joey Fatone was one of the producers so it’s not a surprise that a major theme of the documentary was that Joey Fatone was a pretty cool guy. This show hit all the usual points — hey, there’s Lou Pealman! — without adding much new insight.
Crime Story (Tubi)
My review will drop this upcoming Monday.
Degrassi: The Next Generation (Tubi)
My review will drop tomorrow night.
Hollywood Demons (HBOMax)
I watched two episodes. The first one was about Stephen Collins (yikes!). The second was about Jerry Springer. Now that Jerry is dead and his show is definitely never coming back, all of his producers are trying to cash in by letting you know that they were anti-Jerry the whole time. It all feels a bit self-serving.
Homicide: Life on the Street (Peacock)
My review will drop tomorrow.
Saved By The Bell (Tubi)
Along with this week’s review episode (which will be dropping shortly), I also watched three Patrick Muldoon episodes on Friday. RIP.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch, which ran on NBC and then in syndication from 1989 to 2001. The entire show can be viewed on Tubi.
This week, we finish off the first season of Baywatch.
Episode 1.21 “The End?”
(Dir by Reza Badiyi, originally aired on April 6th, 1990)
This the end, my only friend, the end….
Earthquake! The ground shakes in Los Angeles and the result is pure chaos. While Mitch oversees the rescue operations, Shauni tries to get over her fear of natural disasters, Eddie helps a pregnant woman deliver twins in his lifeguard tower, Gina finds herself pinned under a shelf at the loft, and Craig and Cort are trapped in an underwater cave. Have none of these people noticed that hanging out with Cort always leads to stuff like this happening?
We see a news report that says that five people died in the earthquake. Fortunately, none of those people were a character on Baywatch. (Though, now that I think about it, when was the last time anyone saw Trevor?) The LAPD dive team saves Cort and Craig. Hobie helps Gina get out from underneath that shelf. Eddie and Shauni work together to help deliver those twins and then, as the sun sets behind them, Eddie asks, “Will you marry me?” Shauni nods as the theme music starts up….
Was this the end? It was meant to be. After a season of declining ratings and raising production costs, NBC decided to cancel Baywatch. I guess the executives figured that, if even a shark attack failed to get people to watch, it was best just to move on. Baywatch decided to go out with an episode about an earthquake because it was a California show and California is all about the ground moving under your feet. It actually turned out to be one of the better episodes of the first season, specifically because it focused on lifeguards and other first responders doing their job. There were no silly plots about gamblers or Mitch’s love life or anything else. This was Baywatch the way it probably should have been. But it was too late to keep the show alive on network television.
That said, the Hoff believed in Baywatch and, working with the show’s producers, he brought it back in syndication. This episode was the end of Baywatch on NBC but it was just the beginning of the show that would go on to epitomize a decade.
Through the Shattered Lens 