Tag Archives: review

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 7.27 “Best Ex-Friends/All the Congressman’s Women/Three Faces of Love”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, season 7 comes to an end,

Episode 7.27 “Best Ex-Friends/All the Congressman’s Women/Three Faces of Love”

(Dir by Ted Lange, originally aired on May 12th, 1984)

This week, on The Love Boat, Gopher fires Isaac!

You read that right.  Gopher told Isaac, “You’re fired,” and it was one of the most shocking things I’ve ever seen on The Love Boat.  Some of that was because Gopher and Isaac were best friends.  Most of it was because I had no idea that Gopher could fire people.

Why does Gopher fire Isaac?  Because Isaac refuses to fire Tina Burnell (Eugenia Wright), the new barmaid that Isaac is currently dating.  In Gopher’s defense, Tina is terrible at her job.  Also, in Gopher’s defense, it really doesn’t seem ethical for Isaac to hire someone just because he wants to sleep with her.  In fact, that seems kind of icky by today’s standards.  Then again, this episode aired in 1984.  Times were apparently different back then.

The next morning, Gopher rehires Isaac and the two of them forgive each other.  But then Gopher puts in for a transfer to another ship because he feels that he’s too close to everyone on the boat to do a good job.  (Gopher is probably correct about this.)  Isaac finally admits that Tina is not a good enough barmaid and he gently fires her.  He assures her that, with her looks and personality, she’ll be able to find a new boss who wants to sleep with her and she’ll get a new job in no time.  Isaac chooses friendship over meaningless sex.  Awwwww!

I’m being snarky but this story actually worked far better than it had any right to.  Ted Lange and Fred Grandy always made for a good team.  Their friendship always feels real and, all other issues aside, it’s hard not be happy that they’re still friends at the end of this episode.

As for the other stories, Sal Viscuso plays a movie makeup artist who fears that his girlfriend (Heidi Bohay) is going to cheat on him.  He disguises himself as both Burt Reynolds and Doc Bricker in order to test her loyalty.  Amazingly, she’s touched by his devotion.

And finally, 11 year-old Tori Spelling plays a sociopathic little brat who doesn’t want her Congressman father (Sam Goom) to run for governor or marry his campaign manager (Phyllis Davis).  So, Tori starts cutting up newspapers and magazines and using the headlines to create threatening letters.  Somehow, no one has figured out that Tori is the culprit and the Congressman is traveling with a bodyguard.  (Hopefully, the Congressman is paying for the bodyguard himself and not charging the taxpayers.)  Eventually, Tori comes clean but only after she’s caught with a scissors, glue, and cut up magazine.  Personally, I think Tori should have been tossed overboard but instead, she accepts her father’s ambition and her new stepmother’s love.

This was the final episode of Season 7 and it wasn’t a bad one to go out on.  Tori Spelling was a terrible actress even at the age of eleven but the Gopher/Isaac storyline was touching.  Sadly, this was Lauren Tewes’s final episode and she did not get a grand send-off.  Instead, she was fired after this season because, as Tewes has admitted in several interviews, she was struggling with a serious cocaine addiction.  Tewes didn’t get to do much during Season 7 and, when you consider how important Julie was during the early seasons of The Love Boat, that’s a shame.

Out of respect for Lauren’s final episode, we’re retiring the HOW COKED UP WAS JULIE scale.  What’s important is that Lauren herself got clean and went on to appear in Twin Peaks: The Return.  Good for her!

Song of the Day: Andy Warhol from David Bowie

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Today’s song of the day comes from David Bowie and it’s about Bowie’s fascination with Andy Warhol.  Warhol himself apparently didn’t care for this song but Bowie meant it as a tribute.

This song came out in 1971.  25 years later, Bowie would play Andy Warhol in Basquiat.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.9 “Cutting Edge”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, TC goes surfing!

Episode 4.9 “Cutting Edge”

(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on October 18th, 1998)

When an up-and-coming surfer named Kenny Slaughter (Reed Ferichs) is pressured by a corrupt surf board salesman named Rip Cutter (Matt Battaglia), TC befriends Kenny.  He and Kenny go surfing.  They discuss the philosophy of catching a great wave.  “Are you sure you’re a cop?” Kenny asks.

Uhmm, Kenny …. are you kidding?  TC is the most uptight guy on the beach.  Everything about him screams “cop.”

This episode is an example of something that happened quite frequently with Pacific Blue.  One of the bike cops would befriend someone and the viewer would be left to wonder how that could have possibly happened.  Friendship usually requires a modicum of likability and that’s something that no one on this show seems to have.  Whether it’s Chris saying, “Just doing my job,” after nearly running someone down with her bicycle or Cory rolling her eyes every time that she has to deal with anyone younger than her, there are literally no likable bike cops.  Even this episode features Cory complaining about the attitude that Kenny gave her when she arrested him while he and Rip were having a fight on the beach.  It’s hard not to notice that almost every episode features Cory complaining about someone’s attitude.  It’s a bit of a cliche but it’s true.  If everyone you meet is a jerk, that means that you’re the jerk.

TC assigns Monica to work undercover in Rip’s surf shop.  This means that Monica has to frequently come over to TC’s apartment to give him updates.  Because TC can’t tell anyone that Monica is working undercover, Chris gets suspicious about why Monica is always coming over.  Chris and Cory being paranoid about Monica has been going on for nine episodes now and I think that, narratively, it might be a good idea to just move on from it.  It wasn’t that interesting to begin with and, at this point, Chris and Cory are just coming across as being overage mean girls.

Anyway, this episode actually felt like an abandoned Baywatch storyline.  TC’s no surfer.

Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell: The New Class 2.8 “Rachel’s Choice”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00.  The show is currently on Prime.

This week, Rachel’s boyfriend returns.

Episode 2.8 “Rachel’s Choice”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on October 1st, 1994)

Oh, Hell, we’re back at the country club.

Rachel and Brian are now dating but Rachel still hasn’t told her long-distance boyfriend, football star David Conrad (Kevin Bell).  In this episode, it’s mentioned that Rachel has been dating David for two years (so why was she going on out on a date with Scott during season one?) and that David is the “local boy made good.”  Mr. Belding acts as if David is the only good football player that Bayside ever had, which is definitely A.C. Slater erasure.

(It’s weird how Bayside went from being the most exclusive school in Los Angeles during the first series to apparently just some throw-away slum school in the New Class.)

David told Rachel that he would be spending the summer in Europe but — surprise! — he comes home early for Rachel’s birthday.  (David immediately recognizes Screech as someone he went to school with so David is at least 20.  Rachel appeared in the first 4 seasons of The New Class and, when she left, it was because she transferred to another school.  So, Rachel is around 14 or 15 here and has been dating David for two years, which means that David should probably be in jail.)  Rachel has to make a choice between David and Brian.  Now, that could make for some serious drama if both Brian and David were portrayed as being two nice guys who both liked Rachel.  Instead, David is portrayed as being such a soulless snob that there’s absolutely no doubt who Rachel will eventually pick.  Indeed, the whole episode makes Rachel seem shallow and stupid for going out with David in the first place.

Meanwhile, Mr. Belding is concerned that some of the members are joining a different country clubs.  Why does Belding care?  This is just a summer job for him.  Belding assigns Screech to make a video about the club.  Shouldn’t Belding have run that past the actual owner of the club?

These country club episodes are stupid.  By running them concurrently with the high school episodes, NBC created a situation where one episode would feature Brian and Rachel as a couple and the next episode would feature Brian still trying to work up the courage to ask her out.  It’s as if no one at NBC cared.  That’s a shame because the late Christian Oliver was a likable actor and Brian and Rachel were a cute couple.  (In real life, when this episode aired, 22 year-old Christian Oliver was about 8 years older than Sarah Lancaster but let’s try not to think about that.)

Anyway, the country club sucks.  I hope everyone gets a better job next summer.

 

Song of the Day: One Headlight by The Wallflowers

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

We can drive it home with one headlight….

Some songs just get stuck in your head and I think this is definitely one of them.  This is also a song that always used to play in the background at one of my favorite used bookstores.  I associate One Headlight with searching through old books and learning about history.

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 5.25 “Overload”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, the computer goes down and Erik Estrada asks, “What’s a computer?”

Episode 5.25 “Overload”

(Dir by Robert Pine, originally aired on May 2nd, 1982)

Reni Santoni and Michael Anderson, Jr. play two thieves who hijack a truck that is delivering computer chips.  When the truck is involved in an accident, an old woman named Nettie (Helen Kleeb) spots Anderson hiding in the trailer.  She panics and flees from the scene.

Why do the criminals need the computer chips?  Reni Santoni’s cousin (Denis Mandel) is a genius who has built a device that allows him to hack into other computers.  As a test, he hacks into the Highway Patrol’s computer and rewrites their code.  Suddenly, the computers at HPHQ can no longer be used to look up addresses.  Bonnie is shorted on her paycheck.  Getraer, meanwhile, gets paid a thousand more than usual.  Ponch worries because he entered all the numbers in his little black book into the computer and now, he can’t get them out.  Listening to him deliver his lines, one gets the feeling that Erik Estrada didn’t have the slightest idea what Ponch was talking about and, to be honest, I get the feeling that whoever wrote this episode was equally as confused.  Myself, I’m wondering about the logic of using a work computer for that.  I mean, what if he wants to call someone from his swinging bachelor pad?

Eventually, the Highway Patrol does track down Nettie.  Nettie turns out to be one of the most annoying old biddies to ever appear on this show.  Strangely, everyone at the station is charmed by her, despite the fact that she fled from the scene of a serious accident that was largely caused by her bad driving.  Nettie should be going to prison!

This wasn’t much of an episode.  Larry Wilcox looked miserable and annoyed from beginning to end and it’s easy to understand why he decided not come back after the fifth season.  There are times when it really does appear as if he’s considering pushing Estrada off of his motorcycle.  Sorry, Larry, but we all know what show this is!

Only two more episodes to go before we complete this season!

Retro Television Review: Crime Story 1.9 “Justice Hits The Skids”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Crime Story, which ran on NBC from 1986 to 1988.  The entire show can be found on Tubi!

Torello is going to snap….

Episode 1.9 “Justice Hits The Skids”

(Dir by Mario DiLeo, originally aired on November 11th, 1986)

Torello is losing it.

Well, that’s not really a surprise.  Torello has been losing it since the pilot.  However, this episode finds him acting even more intense than usual.  He’s getting divorced.  His best friend Ted Kehoe has been murdered and the federal prosecutor seems to be more interested in trying to prove that Torello is corrupt than in going after Bartoli and Luca.  Torello doesn’t even go to Ted Kehoe’s funeral, leading to everyone thinking that Torello is losing what little grip on sanity he has left.  Even his soon-to-be ex-wife checks in on him.

While Torello stews over Luca, Suzanne Terry attempts to investigate the growing use of drugs in some of Chicago’s poorest neighbors and she gets attacked and put into the hospital as a result.  David Abrams tries to investigate on his own, leading to Suzanne telling him that she needs some time apart from him.  (Before she’s attacked, David takes her out to dinner.  When a racist diner complains and the head waiter asks them to move to a different table, Suzanne wants to leave the restaurant.  David insists that they stay  and finish their meal.  David may see himself as being a righteous crusader but, at the same time, he also comes across as being rather controlling.  It doesn’t seem to occur to him that Suzanne might not want to give any business to a racist restaurant.)  Torello and the Major Crimes Unit then take up the case, even though his superiors tell him not to waste any time on it.

Sweet Haywood (John Canada Tyrell), the drug dealer who attacked Suzanne, is eventually captured.  Sitting in jail, he meets his public defender, who just happens to be David Abrams.  Abrams pulls out a gun and shoots Haywood in the chest.  However, this turns out to just be a fantasy on David’s part.  When the real Haywood demands to know if Abrams is going to keep him out of the jail, Abrams says, “Of course.  That’s my job.  Abrams for the defense.”

The gun-shooting fantasy scene was effective but otherwise, the ending doesn’t make much sense.  Assigning Abrams to serve as the public defender for a guy who was arrested for beating up Abrams’s girlfriend is a massive conflict-of-interest.  If Abrams intentionally offers up a poor defense, Haywood will automatically have grounds for an appeal.  I mean, this is 1963.  This the era of the Warren Court!

Even with that in mind, this wasn’t a bad episode.  David Abrams and Mike Torello are both flawed heroes, which is what makes the show so watchable.  Torello may be fighting on the side of the law but he really does seem like he’s one bad day away from blowing up the entire city of Chicago.  Meanwhile, Abrams clearly sees himself as being the last righteous crusader but he often seems oblivious to how his actions effect other people.  Neither is perfect.  Indeed, each one seems to be just one step away from self-destructing.

We’ll see what happens!

Lisa’s Week In Television: 6/28/26 — 7/4/26

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Election Coverage

Tuesday’s election coverage was boring.  Only Colorado voted this week and who cares?

Family Ties (Paramount Plus)

I watched an episode of this old 80s sitcom on Saturday morning.  Michael J. Fox dreamt that he had to help Thomas Jefferson write the Declaration of Independence.

Full House (Disney+)

I watched four episodes of this infamous 90s sitcom on Saturday.  In one episode, Jesse was fired from his band and replaced by Barry Williams.  (That was actually funny.)  In another episode, Stephanie was tempted to start smoking.  Then, I watched an episode in which Uncle Jesse was revealed to be a high school drop out.  (Loser!)  And finally, I watched a truly terrible episode in which Jesse dressed his baby sons up as Elvis so that they could win a Cutest Twins contest.  Seriously, this was a terrible show but I have a feeling I’m going to end up watching a few more episodes tomorrow.  It’s strangely addictive.

It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (Hulu)

I watched four episodes on Saturday.  The Gang went on Family Fight.  The Gang went to the water park.  Wolf Cola turned into a marketing disaster.  And, Mac and Dennis battled the recession by giving out totally worthless Paddy Dollars.  I still crack up at the idea of Frank selling knives door-to-door.

King of the Hill (Hulu)

There aren’t many classic 4th of July episodes out there.  Back in the day of traditional network schedules, most TV shows were on hiatus during the summer and, as a result, Independence Day never got as much attention in TV Land as Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas.  That said, there are a few good episodes out there.  On Saturday, I watched the “Born Again On The 4th Of July” episode of King of the Hill.  From the show’s 13th season, it featured Bobby going through a religious phase and trying to stop the Independence Day rivalry between Hank and his neighbors.  It wasn’t the strongest episode of King of The Hill — for one thing, Bobby had already gone through a religious phase a few seasons earlier — but no matter.  Even the weaker episodes of King of the Hill are better than the best episodes of many sitcoms.

The Office (Peacock)

The Client, an episode from the second season, is not a 4th of July episode.  It’s the episode where Michael and Jan have a lunch meeting with a client that ends up going late into the night.  Meanwhile, at the office, Pam discover Michael’s screenplay for Threat Level Midnight and Jim organizes a dramatic reading.  Dwight announces that he has some left-over fireworks, which he and Kevin proceed to set off outside of the office.  That was enough for me to justify watching it on July 3rd.

Portlandia (Netflix)

This morning, I watched the 4th of July BBQs episode of Portlandia.  The Mayor had to find fireworks for the city’s celebration.  A couple tried to cycle through every barbecue in town.  A punk rock barbecue led to chaos.  I enjoyed it!  It was nice to see Kyle MacLachlan as the mayor.

Saved By The Bell (Tubi)

On Saturday morning, I watched the 4th of July “Miss Liberty” episode.  (There really aren’t that many good 4th of July episodes out there.)  The Malibu Sands episodes are always strange to me.  Why would Zack work a summer job?  Zack’s rich!

What I Like About You (Tubi)

Tubi has the first two seasons of What I Like About You!  The only problem is that they’ve replaced the cover of What I Like About You that originally played over the opening credits with his blandly generic, early aughts, girl group pop song.  Bleh.  The only reason I ever watched that show was because I liked that cover of What I Like About You.  Anyway, I watched an episode where Amanda Bynes wanted to have a party at the loft and Jennie Garth didn’t want her to.  All of the squeaky voices hurt my ears.