10 Films For May the 4th


 

If you want to celebrate the 4th of May but you really don’t feel like sitting through any of the Star Wars films (especially now that you know that Leia, Luke, and Han’s struggle was pretty much for naught), here are ten other sci-films that will keep you entertained without ruinng your childhood memories!

  1. Starcrash (1978, dir by Luigi Cozzi) is not only the best of the so-called Star Wars rip-offs, it’s also one of the best space adventures ever made.  In fact, I would argue that Cozzi’s film is actually more entertaining than Star Wars, just because of Cozzi’s unabashed love of the genre and the fact that Starcrash had a bit more deliberate wit than George Lucas’s film.  Starcrash also had a once-in-a-lifetime cast of Caroline Munro, Marjoe Gortner, Joe Spinell, Christopher Plummer, and David Hasselhoff.  Starcrash is a true pop art masterpiece.
  2. Laserblast (1978, dir by Charles Band) — Fresh from menacing Mark Hamill in Corvette Summer, Kim Milford plays a totally 70s dude who finds a discarded alien weapon and turns into a green monster.  At one point, Milford blows up a Star Wars billboard.  Roddy McDowall is a small-town doctor.  Eddie Deezen and Dennis Burkley are bullies.  The Claymation aliens are adorable, especially when they start arguing with each other.
  3. Moonraker (1979, dir by Lewis Gilbert)– James Bond in space!  I’m well aware that Moonraker does not have a great reputation as far as Bond films are concerned but actually, it’s one of Roger Moore’s most enjoyably ludicrous outings.  Daniel Craig’s Bond could never go into space but Roger Moore could.  That’s why Moore will always be the superior Bond.
  4. The Humanoid (1979, dir by Aldo Lado) — After playing Jaws in both The Spy Who Loved Me and Moonraker, Richard Kiel got to play a leading role.  “I believe that jacket belongs to Mr. Gilmore….”  No, this was before Happy Gilmore!  In The Humanoid, Kiel plays the kindly Golob who is transformed into a hulking, evil warrior.  Good Golob has a beard.  Evil Golob doesn’t.  This movie is a bit long but Kiel is always a delight to watch and it also features a cute dog robot.  Barbara Bach is the evil Lady Agatha, who is kept young by space virgin blood.  Ivan Rassimov, owner of the best hair in Italian exploitation, is Lord Graal.
  5. The Visitor (1979, dir by Giulio Paradisi) — What happens when you mix The Omen, The Exorcist, and Star Wars with a bunch of basketball stock footage?  You end up with one of the greatest Italian films ever!  John Huston is the alien/angel!  Lance Henriksen is the devil worshipper who owns a basketball team!  Franco Nero is Jesus, who lives on the Moon with a bunch of bald children!  Shelley Winters is Shelley Winters!  The Visitor is a film that simply has to be seen.
  6. Battle Beyond The Stars (1980, dir by Jimmy T. Murakami) — This Roger Corman-produced film never would have been made if not for the success of Star Wars.  That said, it’s actually a science fiction version of The Magnificent Seven, featuring the type of cast that only Corman could put together.  Richard Thomas, Robert Vaughn, George Peppard, Darlanne Fluegel, John Saxon, and Sybil Danning, they’re all in this terrifically entertaining space opera.
  7. Flash Gordon (1980, dir by Mike Hodges) — How many people have been driven mad after getting the theme song stuck in their head?  At every watch party that I host, Flash Gordon is always at the top of the list of films that people want me to select.  (Unfortunately, it’s not streaming anywhere for free right now.)  Like Starcrash and The Visitor, it’s a pop art masterpiece.  All together now: “Godon’s alive!”
  8. Space Raiders (1983, dir by Howard Cohen) — Roger Corman produced this film about a dumbass kid (David Mendenhall, who also played Stallone’s son in Over The Top) who stows away with a bunch of lovable space pirates and basically gets everyone killed.  This is worth seeing for Thom Christopher as Flightplan.  This film also features a scene where the kid tries to shout across space.  “HAWK!”
  9. Spaceballs (1987, dir by Mel Brooks) — Mel Brooks sends up the Star Wars saga as only he can.  It’s not totally successful but there are plenty of funny lines and Rick Moranis and John Candy are a delight.  Bill Pullman wisely plays his role straight and allows the supporting crew to get most of the laughs.
  10. Space Mutiny (1988, dir by Neal Sundstrom and David Winters) — “GO!  GO!  GO!” Reb Brown yells as Dave Ryder, the new head of security for Cameron Mitchell’s space fleet.  And Brown has a lot to yell about because John Phillip Law is leading a mutiny in plain sight.  Space Mutiny has a reputation for being one of the worst films ever made.  It may be.  But I still enjoy it.  Every space ship needs a disco.

6 Trailers For May 4th


Star Wars not only launched an entire expanded universe.  It also launched a few thousand rip-offs.  For this weeks edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Film Trailers, we’ve got six trailers that might seem just a little familiar….

  1. Battle Beyond The Stars (1980)

From Roger Corman comes this film, which is as much a rip-off of The Magnificent Seven as it is of Star WarsBattle Beyond The Stars was a surprise box office success when it was first released.

2. Space Raiders (1983)

Also from executive producer Roger Corman, Space Raiders tells the story of what happens when a quirky band of intergalactic outlaws pick up an annoying (and frankly, rather stupid) kid.

3. The Humanoid (1979)

From director Aldo Lado, The Humanoid features the great Richard Kiel as the title character.  There’s also a cute robot, an older mystic, and an evil Empire.

4. Message From Space (1978)

Do you remember another film that had a message from space?

5. Flash Gordon (1980)

Interestingly enough, Star Wars was as inspired by the original Flash Gordon as the Flash Gordon reboot was inspired by Star Wars.

6. Starcrash (1978)

And finally, we have Starcrash, the Star Wars rip-off that is actually better than Star Wars!

A Quickie In Space: Space Raiders (dir by Howard R. Cohen)


Space Raiders

Last Saturday was Roger Corman’s 88th birthday and what better way to celebrate than to watch one of the many low-budget but undeniably entertaining films that the great man has produced?

That’s just what I did on Saturday with my Late Night Movie friends.  The movie we watched was an obscure 1983 science fiction film called Space Raiders.  Now, technically, this film was directed by Howard Cohen but, from the first frame, it was obviously a Roger Corman film.  It was also a lot of fun.

Space Raiders takes place in the distant future, at a time when intergalactic corporations have colonized planets with sullen children and space criminals spend their spare time hanging out in dank space stations.  From the minute the film opens with a scene of robots doing menial labor in a factory while a the factory foreman assures the human workers that the next company picnic will take place on a planet where it doesn’t rain, there’s little doubt that the main message of Space Raiders is that the future sucks.

10 year-old Peter (David Mendelhall) lives on the planet of Proycon III (which, if nothing else, is a great name for a planet).  Neglected by his wealthy parents and apparently being the only child on Proycon III, Peter spends his spare time sneaking into robot-filled factories and capturing space bugs.  That’s what Peter is doing when he witnesses a daring raid by a group of — wait for it — space raiders!  Led by the surly but kind-hearted Hawk (Vince Edwards), the raiders steal a spaceship from the factory.  What they don’t realize is that Peter (and the bug that he had just captured seconds before the raid) has stowed away on the ship.

At first, Hawk is not enthusiastic about Peter being on the ship and Peter just wants to get home.  However, as the space raiders deal with both intergalactic cops and alien gangsters, Hawk and the kid start to bond and Peter gets to know the rest of the crew.

Now, to be honest, the majority of Hawk’s crew were pretty interchangeable but my friends and I quickly decided that our favorite was the one that we named Capt. Forehead (played by Thom Christopher).  Capt. Forehead was an alien who had psychic powers and who carried himself with the wounded dignity of a head waiter having a bad night.  It was hard not to like him.

Captain Forehead

Anyway, Peter’s parents want their son back and, since they work for an evil corporation, they have no problem hiring evil mercenaries to get their son back.  It all leads to a lot of people shooting lasers at each other and exploding spaceships.

Now, honestly, we can get all technical and picky about whether or not the plot of Space Raiders made any sense or whether or not any of the actors gave good performances.  We can even talk about the logic of the scene where Peter –upon realizing that Hawk is on a different spaceship than him — responds by attempting to yell, “HAWK!” across the far reaches of space.

But you know what?

That’s missing the point.

In the way that only a low-budget science fiction film produced by Roger Corman can be, Space Raiders was a lot of fun.  The movie moved quickly, the aliens were fun to look at, and the special effects were charmingly cheap.  Flaws and all, Space Raiders had more humanity than Man of Steel, more humor than Gravity, and it was a lot shorter than Avatar.

Watch it below and see for yourself.