Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 9/13/26 — 9/19.26


Once again, this week was more about getting ready for our annual October Horrorthon than watching television.  Here’s a few thoughts on what I did watch.

The latest season of Big Brother is slowly coming to an end.  I’ve kind of been writing about it over at Reality TV Chat Blog.  As I mentioned over there, I’ve found it next to impossible to really get into this season.  I am, however, looking forward to a new season of Survivor on the 23rd and a new season of The Amazing Race on the 30th!

On Monday and Tuesday, I watched several episodes of the E! True Hollywood Story on YouTube.  Most of the uploads were taken straight from old VHS recordings and, as such, they came with the commercials that aired with the show.  I was in history nerd heaven!  I watched episodes about Rodney Harvey, Growing Pains, Three’s Company, the Brat Pack, and more!

On Wednesday, I watched an episode of SCTV on Netflix.  It was a 30-minute parody of Fantasy Island.  I laughed so hard that I almost fell off my couch.  I loved Eugene Levy and John Candy as Roarke and “Patoo.”

On Friday night, I watched an episode of something called Turn of The Century.  It aired on New York public access television in the 90s.  It was very experimental and deliberately arty and I got bored with it.  It was trying a bit too hard.

I also watched and reviewed episodes of Degrassi, CHiPs, Pacific Blue, Hunter, and Sledge Hammer!

Retro Television Review: Baywatch 2.20 “The Big Spill”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch, which ran on NBC and then in syndication from 1989 to 2001.  The entire show can be viewed on Tubi.

This week, someone has turned a lagoon into a death trap!

Episode 2.20 “The Big Spill”

(Originally aired on May 4th, 1992)

This week, Lane Brody returns!

Now, if you’re like me, your initial reaction to that is to say, “Who?” When I first saw Lane Brody (played by Jeff Lester) at Baywatch Headquarters, I found myself wondering why everyone was so happy to see him, because I didn’t have the slightest idea who he was. For once I decided to do some research instead of just making a wild guess as to what was going on.

What I found is a little messier than the episode implies. Jeff Lester had appeared once in season 1, in “Old Friends”—but as Lance Jarvis, a different character. This episode presents Lane as a former Baywatch lifeguard turned environmental activist and as Mitch’s old friend. The writers seem to have assumed viewers would greet him like a returning regular and be immediately invested in his story.  One has to admire the show’s confidence, if nothing else.

In this episode, Lane is established as being a member of Green Force, a group of environmentalists who take “direct action” against hunters and oil companies. Mitch agrees with Green Force’s belief in protecting the environment, but he feels that their tactics are counterproductive. When Hobie and his friend Brenda (Patricia Supancic) get sick after a dip in a polluted lagoon, Mitch reconsiders his stand.

Lane is convinced that the lagoon was polluted by Transicon Industries. When he sneaks into a Transicon chemical plant to look for evidence, he’s attacked by the company’s goons and then framed for polluting the lagoon himself. With Lane out of commission, it’s up to Mitch and Shauni to break into the plant and find the evidence. Fortunately, Ben Edwards has some wave runners they can use to make their escape. Everyone at Baywatch is united in their love for Lane Brody.

This was another action-oriented installment of Baywatch. The message is sincere, but the villains are such caricatures that it’s hard to take the show seriously. It ends with Mitch and a recovering Hobie surfing in the ocean. It’s a nice moment of bonding.

Finally, I have no proof of this, but I find it interesting that this episode seems to indicate Lane Brody was willing to return to Baywatch, and that season 3 then introduced a new lifeguard named Matt Brody. As far as I know, Lane and Matt weren’t related, but it still wouldn’t surprise me if Matt was originally going to be Lane. Again, that’s all just speculation on my part. It could also just be that someone on the show liked the last name Brody.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Sledge Hammer 1.6 “To Sledge, With Love”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing SLEDGE HAMMER!, a cop comedy which ran on ABC from 1986 to 1988. The entire series can be found on Prime!

This week, Sledge is going back to school!

Episode 1.6 “To Sledge, With Love”

(Dir by David Wechter, originally aired on October 31st, 1986)

When an obnoxious man insists on smoking a cigar in the police station despite it being against the rules, Sledge Hammer shoots the cigar out of his mouth. Later, when Hammer asks Captain Trunk if he’s going to yell at him about shooting the cigar, Trunk asks what difference it would make.

It’s good to see that Trunk is learning.

Speaking of learning, the local high school has been taken over by a gang! It’s time for Sledge Hammer and Dori to go back to school. Unfortunately for Hammer, that means that he can’t shoot or even hit anyone. “You mean I have to wait until this punk is 18 before I can toss him off the roof?” Hammer asks. Sorry, Hammer!

The school has a lot of problems, but the main one is a delinquent named Turk (Shawn Klugman). Turk is more concerned with stealing cars for Mr. Roscoe (Norman Alden) than with going to class. When Sledge Hammer tries to get through to him by showing off his gun and challenging him to a fight, Turk laughs him off. When Sledge Hammer tries to teach Turk that he’s a “homosapien,” Turk angrily declares that he has lots of girlfriends and then walks out of class.

It looks like Turk is a lost cause, but Hammer has one more trick up his sleeve. He reveals how much money Roscoe is making by selling used cars. Turk realizes that he deserves to get paid a lot more than just $500 for his hard work. Turk helps Hammer take down Roscoe and then, at the end of the episode, he announces that he’s going to join the Police Academy as soon as he graduates.

Good work, Hammer!

I enjoyed this episode more than last week’s. While last week’s episode sometimes seemed to be a bit too much of a straight crime drama, this week’s episode returns to the format of nonstop jokes. The entire episode is a parody of those painfully earnest films where a teacher comes to a tough school and manages to change the lives of their students. Hammer changes lives not with confidence-building and smart lesson plans but instead with a big gun. Hey, whatever gets the job done!

How do you thank someone who took you from crayons to perfume? It’s not easy, but I’ll try….

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 4.11 “Santa Claus Is Dead”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Daily Motion.

It’s Christmas in Boston.

Episode 4.11 “Santa Claus Is Dead”

(Dir by Leo Penn, originally aired on December 18th, 1985)

It’s the holidays and, of course, Westphall is depressed.

Are we surprised? It’s Christmas. Everyone else is making an effort to spread some holiday cheer. Westphall is being his usual glum self. Westphall is — and I know this is just going to be the most shocking reveal ever, so I’ll give you a chance to get ready for it — an agnostic who doesn’t celebrate the holidays. WOW! Who would have guessed?

Yes, yes, I know: Westphall is supposed to be the moral center of this show, the man who takes all the burdens of running the hospital on his shoulders. That may have been the writers’ intention, but for the most part he just comes across like a self-righteous bore.

Lizzie (Dana Short) and her boyfriend, Rick (Casey Siemaszko), visit Westphall for the holidays. Rick seems like a genuinely nice guy who is sad because he’s away from his family and their Christmas traditions. Westphall isn’t much help. When Rick gives him a present, Westphall smiles glumly. When Rick talks about how it’s Christmas Eve and his Catholic family usually attends midnight mass, Westphall says that he and Lizzie should go to a movie because “there won’t be any lines.” When Rick and Lizzie decide to go to the midnight service at St. Barnabas and agree to take Tommy with them, Westphall says that he won’t be joining them. If Rick, a Catholic, is willing to spend Christmas with a bunch of Episcopalians, the least Westphall could do is set aside his boring agnosticism for one night.

Dr. Craig hosts his annual Christmas party. Feeling sad about Stephen, Craig drinks too much and ends up crying in the kitchen. When Ellen tells him that it’s time to go to St. Barnabas, Craig refuses and complains that he can’t worship a God who would so “arbitrarily” kill his son. My heart broke for the Craigs. Still, there’s always something annoying about people who have no problem believing in God when bad things happen to other people, then have a sudden crisis of faith as soon as something bad happens to them. On the one hand, I felt Mark pain.  On the other hand, there was a part of me that thought, Hey, Mark — your son was a drug addict who got high and drove. What do you expect God to do about it?

At the hospital, the man hired to play Santa Claus (Aaron Fletcher) has a heart attack and collapses right in front of a bunch of horrified children. At first it appears that Santa is going to live, but after surgery he has another heart attack and dies. Because Axelrod was Santa’s doctor, Dr. Auschlander’s grandson, Max (Danny McMurphy), accuses Axelrod of killing Santa.

Fortunately, before Santa died, Max did tell him that he wants a snow globe to replace one that belonged to his grandmother. (Max accidentally broke it.) After Santa dies, Max’s grandmother discovers that a gift has been left for her under the hospital’s Christmas tree. It’s the snow globe! So the old man really was Santa.

And now he’s dead.

The episode ends at St. Barnabas. Westphall shows up at the service, and Tommy, who usually tries to hit his father, runs down the aisle to hug him. Meanwhile, Dr. Craig walks in the rain.

Wow, what a depressing Christmas episode. It was also a pretty moving one. I will admit that I started crying as soon as Santa had his heart attack. Seeing Santa in the hospital brought back memories of sitting with Dad when he was in home hospice care. I was the one who was there when he died, and I was the one who sat there for two hours, waiting for the hospice nurse to arrive. Back in 2023, I had no idea that would be the last time I would ever give him a Christmas present. As this episode showed, there’s a lot of sadness in the world, but there are also those moments of happiness and, if we’re lucky, community.

Yes, Santa died. But at least he got to deliver one final gift.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Hunter 2.2 “Night of the Dragons”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Hunter, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1991.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, Hunter and McCall get involved in a gang war in Chinatown!

Episode 2.2 “Night of the Dragons”

(Dir by James Whitmore, Jr, originally aired on September 28th, 1985)

McCall’s desire to try out a Chinese restaurant leads to her and Hunter witnessing a shootout and an apparent murder in Chinatown. (It’s “apparent” because the body disappears in all the confusion.) A war is brewing between two gang lords, the Chinese Chang (James Hong) and the Vietnamese Mr. Nim (Arsenio “Sonny” Trinidad). However, when Hunter and McCall try to investigate, they’re told to let the “Asian Affairs Unit” handle things.

Hunter suspects that an old friend, Detective Raymond Lau (Clyde Kusatsu), has gone crooked and is now working for Chang. It turns out Hunter is half-right. Lau is giving information to Chang, but only because Chang has kidnapped his daughter and is holding her hostage. Chang, it turns out, likes to kidnap people. For instance, he kidnaps McCall. How often can McCall get kidnapped? It seems to happen fairly frequently.

This was another action-packed episode of Hunter. Every few minutes, someone is either shooting a gun or threatening to. Meanwhile, McCall just wanted to find a nice Chinese place to eat. It’s obvious that, with the second season, the show had found a formula that worked for it and was determined to stick to it. This episode benefited from strong guest performances from Hong, Trinidad, and especially Clyde Kusatsu.

That said, I do wish this episode had explored its themes a bit more deeply. It’s mentioned that Hunter served in Vietnam, but it’s mostly just a throwaway reference used to explain how Hunter knew that the bullets recovered from a crime scene had been fired by Mr. Nim’s gang. The rivalry between the Chinese Chang and the Vietnamese Nim also serves as a reminder of the Vietnam War, but again, the episode doesn’t really dig into it. At one point, Chang says that Lau is weak because he was born not in China but in America, and again, it’s hard not to feel that the episode missed an opportunity to dig deeper with both men.

(I’ll also mention that, at one point, McCall compares one of the Chinese gangsters to Godzilla. Godzilla, needless to say, is part of Japan’s culture and not China’s.)

This was a good episode of Hunter that felt like it had the potential to be so much more.

Retro Television Review: Sylvan In Paradise 1.1 “Pilot”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  This Thursday, I will be reviewing Sylvan in Paradise, which aired its only episode on NBC in 1986.  The show can be found on YouTube!

Episode 1.1 “Pilot”

(Dir by Terry Hughes, originally aired on August 2nd, 1986)

“Welcome, welcome, welcome,” says Sylvan Sprayberry (Jim Nabors) to the guest checking into the Hawaiian hotel that employs him. Sylvan is tall, goofy, and talkative, and it’s never really made clear how he somehow became the head bellboy at a hotel in Hawaii. At one point, even Sylvan says he can’t believe he’s gone from “pickin’ cotton in Alabama” to working in paradise.

The uptight owner of the hotel, Clinton Waddle (Brent Spiner), fears that Sylvan will embarrass him when the Vice Consul of New Zealand (Michael Ensign) checks in. Sylvan is more concerned with making sure his niece, Lucy Apple (Courteney Cox), has a wonderful wedding when she marries another bellboy, Sparky McCann (Glenn Withrow).

When a guest who claims to be named Roy Rogers (Pat McCormick) gives Sylvan a statue to deliver to “a man in a green jacket,” Sylvan hands the statue off to Sparky so Sparky can get the tip. Unfortunately, both Roy Rogers and the man in the green jacket turn out to be drug smugglers, and the statue is full of cocaine. Sparky’s going to jail! “Golly!” Sylvan says.

Sylvan sure does feel bad about ruining Lucy’s wedding and getting Sparky sent to jail. Plus, the Vice Consul is now insisting on checking out of the hotel. When Sylvan insists on helping the Vice Consul with his luggage, one of the suitcases opens and reveals that the Vice Consul of New Zealand is himself a drug smuggler. Ha! Take that, New Zealand!

Somehow this leads to Sparky getting out of jail. No one has any hard feelings against Sylvan because he’s such a nice guy. Personally, I would have hard feelings, because just about everything that happens in this episode could have been avoided if Sylvan weren’t so stupid. Jim Nabors gives the same performance here that he gave as Gomer Pyle in the 1960s. The only problem is that Gomer was supposed to be young, whereas Sylvan is in his late 50s and looks older. He really has no excuse for not knowing any better. Would you hire someone who screws everything up to be your head bellhop?

The pilot did not become a series. Today, the only thing really interesting about it is that it featured a pre-Star Trek Brent Spiner and a pre-Friends Courteney Cox. Cox is stuck playing a one-dimensional role, but at least Spiner gets to express some annoyance with Sylvan. He was probably speaking for the entire audience.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 5.3 “False Start”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, OJ Simpson is stalked by an abhorrent admirer!

Episode 5.3 “Fale Start”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on October 25th, 1989)

Johnny Gunn, the new quarterback, is injured while leading the Bulls to victory in their latest game.  Westwood, who has an unexplained dislike for Gunn, convinces the drugged quarterback to sign away his power of attorney and then has Gunn undergo a risky surgery.  When Gunn realizes what has happened, he goes to the construction site of Westwood’s new house and knocks a few things over.  The lesson?  When your quarterback has just finished spending several years in prison for manslaughter, don’t upset him.

Dr. Death is stunned to discover that the highest bidder in the “Win a Day With Dr. Death” auction was not Heather Locklear but instead Carlyle Trent (Vince Edwards), a motorcycle-riding millionaire who happens to be gay.  (Trent was obviously based on publisher Malcolm Forbes Sr.)  Trent thinks that Dr. Death might be gay too.  Oh, the hilarity, I guess.  Actually, this storyline wasn’t as homophobic as one might expect from 1st & Ten.  One of cool things about Dr. Death is that, despite his fearsome image, he’s usually the most open-minded and least prejudiced of all of the Bulls.

Finally, TD Parker (OJ Simpson) finds himself being stalked by a woman named Lisa (Laura Alavarez).  Hey, that’s my name!  Anyway, what starts as a one night stand ends with OJ having to talk Lisa out of shooting him and Kristy.  Wow, OJ Simpson getting stalked by a homicidal maniac.  Who would have guessed?

This episode tried to cram three big storylines into just 24 minute and, as a result, everything ended up feeling a bit half-baked.  Last season, for all of its flaws, did seem to have a definite destination in mind,  The Bulls were finally going to win the Championship Game.  This season, on the other hand, has been all over the place.

Get it together, Bulls!

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 8.11 “My Mother, My Chaperone/The Present/The Death and Life of Sir Albert Demerest/Welcome Aboard”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

Is your mind on a new romance?  Are you ready to set sail for adventure?

Episode 8.11 “My Mother, My Chaperone/The Present/The Death and Life of Sir Albert Demerest/Welcome Aboard”

(Dir by Richard Kinon, originally aired on November 24th, 1984)

Your Love Boat crew is sailing to London!

This is another one of those two-hour episodes that was shot on location.  I always enjoy these episodes, even if they are mostly just extended travelogues.  This one actually has a few good storylines to go along with the scenes of the crew walking around London and France.

For instance, Marc Singer plays John Neary, Judy’s ex-husband who boards the cruise in an attempt to win her back.  This was the first storyline to really feature Judy as someone other than just the perky replacement for Julie.  We saw how happy she was at the prospect of getting together with John but we also saw how John consumed her life to the extent that she started screwing up at work.  When John suggested that Judy’s job really wasn’t that important to begin with, we saw why their marriage failed in the first place.  This was the first episode in which Judy really felt like a member of the group.

Colleen Dewhurst played Maud Correll (Colleen Dewhurst), a former actress who is sailing to London with her son, Byron (Peter Barton).  On the cruise, Maud tells Byron that his father is actually the distinguished actor, Sir Albert Demerest (Trevor Howard).  In London, Maud and Sir Albert meet and, in a wonderfully acted scene, Sir Albert says he isn’t sure that he wants to meet the son that he previously didn’t know he had.  “It’s been 20, 21 years,” Sir Albert says, “it’s too late.”  Still, Byron wants to be an actor and he visits Sir Albert at work.  Albert is filming a commercial and he keeps flubbing his lines.  At first, Byron is upset that his father would sell out his talents but eventually, he comes to understand that, sometimes, an actor doesn’t have a choice.  The bills have to be paid.

This story was surprisingly good.  Dewhurst, Howard, and Barton all gave heartfelt performances.  Howard was obviously not in the best of health when he appeared on The Love Boat but his fragile appearance only adds to the poignance of the story.

Speaking of good performances, the great German actress Lili Palmer plays novelist Lily Marlowe.  Lily is a cynic about love and she’s concerned when she sees that her virginal daughter, Samantha (Anna-Alicia), is falling for Roger Wembly (Morgan Stewart).  And when Samantha runs into Roger’s wife in London, it appears that Lily is right.  However, Roger then takes over Speakers’ Corner and gives a speech about how much he loves Samantha and how he and his wife are getting divorced.  He wins over both Samantha and Lily.  While the story might have been a standard Love Boat melodrama (and how convenient was that divorce?), the scenes of Lily, Samantha, and Roger in London were nice to look at.  (Rainy, misty London was lovely.)  And the use of Speakers’ Corner was a reminder of what the UK used to be.

Finally, Kathy Ross (Loretta Swit) decides to test the fidelity of her husband, Leonard (Dennis Holahan), by hiring a prostitute to seduce him.  The prostitute, Monika (Catherine Oxenberg), hopes to get her hands on Leonard’s money by lying and breaking up his marriage with Kathy.  But, after seeing how terrible Leonard feels after Kathy leaves him, Monika has a change of heart and tells the truth.  This was the weakest of the episode’s stories but Catherine Oxenberg did have a few funny lines.

All in all, this was a great cruise!  London brought out the best of The Love Boat.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 4.19 “Near Death”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week’s episode is stupid even for Pacific Blue.

Episode 4.19 “Near Death”

(Dir by Gary Winter, originally aired on April 4th, 1999)

Before I say anything else about this episode, allow me to say this: Ugh.

Okay, so check this out. A group of home invaders, led by Claire (Monica Louwerens) and her husband Milo (Matt Borlenghi), are in a van, fleeing from their latest robbery. TC, Chris, Cory, and Bobby are all chasing after them on their bikes. The van takes a sharp turn, the passenger-side door flies open, and Claire falls out. TC swerves to avoid Claire and is thrown straight into an electrical junction box. TC gets electrocuted.

Cory, Chris, and Bobby all arrive and immediately run over to TC. TC isn’t breathing. There’s no heartbeat. Cory and Bobby perform CPR. TC, meanwhile, is having a near-death experience, which means that we get a montage of old clips. They manage to bring TC back to life, but no one bothers to check on Claire. Claire ends up in a coma and subsequently dies at the hospital. Milo blames the cops for ignoring his wife while all of them gathered around TC.

…and Milo is absolutely right. Don’t get me wrong. It makes sense that Cory, Bobby, and especially Chris would be worried about TC. But it doesn’t change the fact that they basically just left another gravely injured person on the street while they gathered around TC. This is not the first time that something like this happened on Pacific Blue, and it’s yet another example of our heroes being rather selfish people.

Later, Cory announces to all the other bicycle cops that their first priority is to track down Milo and his gang because “this one is personal.” In other words, don’t worry about any of the other crimes that might be happening in Santa Monica because those crimes don’t directly involve any of the show’s stars. As is often the case with this show, it’s never really explained why the case apparently only belongs to the bicycle patrol. We don’t see any burglary detectives investigating the home invasions or anything like that. I guess the bike patrol has jurisdiction over everything.

As for TC, he reacts to his near-death experience by becoming more philosophical. He’s determined to always tell the truth. Over the course of the episode, he insults all four of the rookies: Granger, Cruz, Jamie, and Monica. Later, once TC starts to return to normal, he apologizes to Granger, Cruz, and Jamie but smirks when Monica asks if TC has anything he wants to say to her. “Nope,” he says. It’s kind of weird how this show wants its audience to hate Monica despite the fact that Monica is usually the only one of the cops who can be depended upon to do her job.

This episode really annoyed me. There was just something really annoying about a show about bicycle cops attempting to impart some sort of philosophical message about life. Did no one consider that TC is nowhere near a deep enough character to be believable as someone who worries about the larger questions of existence? Did no one consider that Jim Davidson’s limited range made him exactly the wrong actor for this type of story? In the past, TC was always dull but reliable. In this episode, he’s condescending. Since Chris and Cory were already condescending and have been for several seasons, TC joining them pushed this episode to new heights of unearned smugness.

This was an annoying episode. At least no one went undercover.

Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell: The New Class 2.18 “Breaking Up”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00.  The show is currently on Prime.

It’s Tommy D’s birthday!

Episode 2.18 “Breaking Up”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 12th, 1994)

Lindsay wants to buy Tommy a great birthday present but, unfortunately, she’s broke.  All of her friends are broke.  It looks like they’re going to have to cancel Tommy’s birthday this year.  But then Brian comes up with a plan.  What if they convince Belding to let Brian and Bobby be in charge of the video yearbook and then the use the camera to shoot a birthday video Tommy while, at the same time, screwing over all of the students who actually want a yearbook?

It’s a great idea!  Bobby films Linsday talking about how much she dislikes everything that Tommy is really into, like cars.  Bobby also films Tommy growing close to Katie Keller (Kim Baranof), Brian’s never before-mentioned sister who does not appear to be from Switzerland.  (In all fairness, she could be a stepsister.  The show has never really made it clear just why exactly Brian left Switzerland for Bayside so maybe his mother married an American or something.)  Katie likes cars and videogames, just like Tommy!

Realizing that Tommy and Lindsay’s relationship is in trouble, Brian pays off a lot of other students to tell Tommy that Katie’s been coming onto them.  Wow, way to slutshame you own sister, Brian.  What a jerk.  Anyway, Tommy puts the kibosh on his growing attraction to Katie but, at his birthday party, Lindsay learns about how Brian spread rumors about Katie to save Lindsay’s relationship with Tommy.  Lindsay and Tommy admit to not having much in common and Saved By The Bell: The New Class’s longest relationship comes to an end….

And that’s  not really a good thing for either Lindsay or Tommy D.  This isn’t like when Slater and Jessie used to break up.  Slater and Jessie actually had personalities that went beyond who they were dating.  The same can’t really be said about Tommy and Lindsay.  It’s not the fault of the actors, as Jonathan Angel and Natalia Cigliuti were actually two of the more likable members of the ensemble.  It’s just that Saved By The Bell: The New Class was never about complex characters.

It’s also not about continuity.  Lindsay and Tommy D are still dating in the country club episodes.  Because all of the members of the Gang already knew Screech in the country club episodes, that means that they had to have taken place in the summer after the school episodes.  Plus, in this episode, Brian is not dating Rachel and that again means that the country club episodes had to happen after this episode.  So, Lindsay and Tommy D are either going to get back together or the show’s writers just didn’t care.

What a mess!