Hey, remember that time in 2007 when all the students at Toronto’s Degrassi Community School were turned into zombies? This 10 minute episode of Degrassi Minis takes a non-canonical look at what would happen to everyone’s favorite Canadian high school if there was a zombie apocalypse!
(By the way, this was made in 2007, long before the premiere of The Walking Dead.)
Enjoy watching Drake turn into a zombie!
Remember Freakylinks?
If you don’t, do not worry. To be honest, I had totally forgotten about it until, twelve years ago, my friend Janeen mentioned it to me. Freakylinks is a show that aired on Fox back in 2000. It only lasted one season and it was about this guy (played by Ethan Embry) who ran a website called freakylinks.com. It was a site dedicated to investigating the paranormal. I know it sounds like something else.
Freakylinks was produced by the same company that produced The Blair Witch Project. A few months before the show premiered, in order to try to create some Blair Witch-style buzz for the production, the production company set up a website called Freakylinks.com and designed it to look like it was just some ghost hunter’s Geocities-style blog. While the web site got some publicity, it didn’t translate into ratings and Freakylinks was canceled. However, the entire series was later uploaded to YouTube and below you’ll find a pilot!
Prepare to take a trip into the past, to a time when the internet was still a mysterious and powerful thing and people apparently didn’t realize that anyone with time to kill could make a web site.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!
This week, Janet Leigh boards the boat and probably ends up wishing she hadn’t.
Episode 8.16 “Instinct/Unmade for Each Other/BOS”
(Dir by Richard Kinon, originally aired on January 5th, 1985)
Leslie (Vic Tayback) pays money to a computer dating service and is told to meet his date Shelley in the lobby of the Pacific Princess.
Shelley (Conrad Bain) also pay money to the same computer dating service and he is also told to meet his date on the Pacific Princess. The name of his date? Leslie.
Uh-oh! There’s been a mistake! At first, the plain-spoken Leslie and the fussy Shelley just laugh it off and agree to enjoy the cruise. But then they both fall for Joan Phillipps (Janet Leigh). Joan tells both men that she loves them because she’s enjoying the attention. Eventually, Leslie learns that Joan has been making fun of him behind his back and Shelley discover that Joan has been doing the same thing to him. Leslie and Shelley agree to be friends and hit the New Yok singles scene together.
Uhmm …. okay, then. The main problem with this storyline was that it asked us to believe that Janet Leigh couldn’t do better than Vic Tayback and Conrad Bain.
Meanwhile, Emelyne Namackere (a very annoying Irlene Mandrell) boards the ship with the expectation that her long-distance boyfriend will be waiting for her. Instead, Neil Bonhoff (Bruce Penhall) shows up and introduces himself as a friend of Emelyne’s boyfriend. Neil explains that Emelyne’s boyfriend has gotten married and that he sent Neil in his place. Emelyne is upset but eventually she falls for Neil. She sleeps with Neil and then announces that she knows Neil is going to dump her because men don’t marry women who they don’t respect. (Yikes!) Neil responds by asking Emelyne to marry him. Emelyne says yes and then she discovers that Neil was lying about her boyfriend getting married. Sneaky Neil! But, as is so often the case on The Love Boat, Emelyne is eventually willing to overlook a history of sociopathic deception in the name of love.
Those stories were both pretty bad. Fortunately, the third story is a bit better. Isaac falls for Lynda Miles (Berlinda Tolbert), who is member of a New Age self-help movement called BOS. At first, Isaac just pretends to be into BOS to get Lynda to talk to him but soon, he becomes a believer. His new openness with his emotions makes his co-workers uncomfortable. It’s a very simple story but Ted Lange sells it. As for BOS itself, it sounds like a cult so I’m glad Isaac appears to be over it by the end of the episode.
This episode was pretty forgettable. Irlene Mandrell and Bruce Penhall had an amazing lack of chemistry and their story was almost painful to watch as a result. Janet Leigh deserved better.
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network! It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.
This week, we start the fifth and final season of Pacific Blue.
Episode 5.1 “Reckoning”
(Dir by Terence H. Winkless, originally aired on July 18th, 1999)
The fifth season begins with an episode that, even by the standards of Pacific Blue, is problematic and dumb. Where to begin?
This episode picks up from where the fourth season ended. John Patrone is dead. Bruce Best (Kevin McClatchy), the father of a teenage girl who killed herself after being raped by Patrone, has been arrested for the crime. Bobby has been arrested for tossing the rifle that Patrone used in the harbor. Because Bobby discussed his plans with Granger, Jamie, and Monica, they’ve all been suspended from the force pending the results of an Internal Affairs investigation.
When Assistant District Attorney Tucker (Michelle Clunie) meets with Bobby and TC, Bobby does the usual smug act that all of the members of the bike patrol do whenever they’re in trouble. Bobby starts making demands for a deal that will protect the other three rookies. Tucker proceeds to charge Bobby with being an accessory to first degree murder. Ha! Take that, Bobby.
TC files a formal complaint against Susan Jessop of Internal Affairs, accusing her of sexual harassment and bias. Jessop is taken off the case but Jessop’s boss, Captain Sharp (Gretchen German), turns out to be just as strange as Jessop. (If I had to guess, I’d say that Holly Gaginer had some sort of scheduling conflict that kept her from returning as Jessop and the writers just crossed out Jessop’s name in the script and substitued Sharp’s.) TC is suspended from his command. Cory is named the new temporary commander of Pacific Blue. Cory is also the union rep for the three rookies who are being investigated. How can she both be in management and the union at the same time?
Chris gets mad at TC for getting suspended. She wants to transfer to Homicide and now, being married to him could be a career liability. They have a big argument on the pier. Cory, who really should be too busy running the department to get involved in any of this, sits on her bicycle on watches.
When it’s time for Bruce and Bobby to be taken to the courthouse for their arraignment, a man fires a shot at Bruce. Bruce falls to the ground. Oh wait, that’s not Bruce. That’s TC disguised at Bruce! And luckily, he was wearing a bulletproof vest! Patrone’s lawyer, Steve Plana (Eddie Garcia), is arrested for setting up the assassination attempt.
In the courtroom, veteran television producer Steven J. Cannell shows up as the no-nonsense judge. Tucker starts to call witnesses. Things aren’t looking good for Bobby and Bruce. Suddenly, Father Crane (John Kirby) stands up in the back of the court and announces that Bobby and Bruce are innocent. Father Crane first explains that he was the one who threw the rifle into the harbor. He says he did it after Bobby came to him for advice. Father Crane then goes on to say that he was the one who shot Patrone because that was the only way to stop Patrone’s reign of terror. Bobby and Bruce have been covering for him!
Bobby and Bruce are released and exonerated. Father Crane is convicted. TC later visits Crane in jail and says that he knows Crane is lying about both killing Patrone and tossing the rifle in the harbor. TC mentions that Crane is going to be transferred to a state prison where Patrone “had a lot of friends.” What TC, who has been reinstated as commander of Pacific Blue, does not do is apparently tell anyone that Crane is obviously not guilty. For his part, Crane says that it will be a chance for him to minister to those who really need it. You know, Father Crane, you could have just applied to be a prison chaplain. You didn’t have to confess to a murder you didn’t commit.
Bobby takes the recovered rifle and gives it back to Bruce. Bobby admits that Crane lied about tossing the gun. Bruce admits that he killed Patrone. Bobby says that he still feels like Bruce did the right thing. Bruce thanks Bobby for looking out for him. Hey, guys, there’s an innocent man — A PRIEST! — going to prison for you idiots! Is that somehow not an issue?
Chris tells TC that she knows Father Crane lied about being the murderer. She also says that she doesn’t feel like TC deserves his command. He let Bobby get away with destruction of evidence. He’s letting Bruce get away with murder. Finally, someone’s speaking some sense! Not that it matters. The episode ends with the conversation. Knowing Pacific Blue, I doubt any of this will ever be brought up again.
This episode really annoyed me. Father Crane is going to prison but I guess we’re not supposed to care because at least Bobby is off the hook. Does anyone on Pacific Blue ever take responsibility for their mistakes? This is the fourth episode to feature Jamie complaining about Internal Affairs harassing her because she lied on her application to become a police officer. Gee, Jamie — MAYBE YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE LIED IN THE FIRST PLACE! And now Bobby has basically decided that some murders are okay. Where does it end with these people?
At least this is the last season.
Since we started the day with a documentary about Bigfoot, it seems appropriate to toss one in for the end of the day as well! This television show comes from 1976. Leonard Nimoy hosts In Search of Bigfoot!
Can you find him?
Tonight’s televised horror is The Cloning of Clifford Swimmer. Peter Haskell stars as Clifford Swimmer, an angry jerk who is unhappy with his marriage. He’s come up with a plan, though. He’s going to have himself cloned and then, after leaving his clone with his family, he’ll be free to live his life. However, Swimmer discovers that things never work that simply when it comes to creating a clone. This is a clever story with a great twist at the end.
It originally aired on November 1st, 1974 as a part of ABC’s The Wide World of Mystery.
I love Alfred Hitchcock. And I really love Charles Bronson. When you consider that Bronson was featured three times in ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS, you know I’m all in. Bronson first appeared in the season 1 episode, “And So Died Riabouchinska” which starred the Invisible Man himself, Claude Rains! Now seemed like a good time for a rewatch!
When a juggler named Ockman is found dead in the basement of a vaudeville theater, Detective Krovitch (Charles Bronson), is on the case. The prime suspect is John Fabian (Claude Rains), a ventriloquist whose act revolves around his beautiful female dummy, Riabouchinska, who we find out is modeled after a long, lost love. As Krovitch interrogates Fabian and many others, including his embittered wife Alyce (Wynne Miller), and her lover, the shady manager Douglas, it becomes clear that the ventriloquist has a dark past. We discover a Fabian who is lost in a world of obsession, self delusion and perversion, a world that the victim was threatening to expose. Without giving too much away, this episode blends psychological horror with police procedural and spits out quite the freaky story.
Adapted by Mel Dinelli from Ray Bradbury’s short story, “And So Died Riabouchinska” is an exceptional entry in Season 1 of the ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS TV series. Claude Rains is incredible as Fabian. It’s a thespian tour-de-force, with Rains creating a role that’s creepy, pathetic, and oddly relatable all at the same time. I haven’t seen many of Rains’ most notable works, but based on his performance here, I need to. Charles Bronson, whose strong screen presence was obvious from the beginning of his career, goes toe to toe with Rains (and Riabouchinska) and helps ground the episode in something resembling the real world. It’s not a showy role for the icon, but he conveys the toughness and authority that would go on to define his career. But what sets this episode truly apart is a storyline that explores the human psyche in a way that seems daring for 1956 television. There are parts of this episode that will definitely make you uncomfortable.
Overall, in my opinion, “And So Died Riabouchinska” is an essential episode of the ALFRED HITCHCOCK PRESENTS series. It’s a lot of fun seeing Hitchcock introduce the show at the beginning and wrap it up at the end, but the best part is the fact that the story that takes place in-between is creepy, clever, and very re-watchable.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00. The show is currently on Prime.
This week, the Gang learns a pointless lesson about cheating.
Episode 2.22 “To Cheat Or Not To Cheat”
(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on December 3rd, 1994)
When I was in high school, my best subjects were always things like History, English, Drama, and Creative Writing. I excelled at classes that involved creativity, writing, and research. I absolutely sucked at any class the involved numbers.
In fact, during my senior year, I nearly flunked Algebra II. It just wasn’t my thing. I could usually get the right answer. Indeed, a lot of the time, I would look at a equation and solve it in my head within seconds. The problem was that I had to “show my work” and my work was always sloppy. Whenever I had to actually write out the numbers and the steps, I would end up either making a careless mistake or I would double guess myself.
Fortunately, Erin has taken Algebra II the year before me and she had saved all of her tests. An exam day, I would just wear a short skirt and write all the answers on my inner thigh before going to class. That was how I passed Algebra II. If I hadn’t done that, I would have flunked Algebra II and I would have graduated with a normal diploma instead of my neat advanced diploma.
In short, I cheated and I’ve never really regretted or felt bad about it. I did what I had to do so that I could enjoy the classes that I liked as opposed to spending all year stressing about the one that I struggled with.
This episode of Saved By The Bell: The New Class also deals with cheating though I’m not sure that what happens in the episode actually counts. A school dance is approaching and Brian wants to take Rachel. But unless Rachel gets a B on her History midterm, she’s not going to be allowed to go. When Brian happens to come across a copy of the midterm, he tells Rachel what she should study. Rachel does so and scores an A.
The show calls this cheating but is it? Brain doesn’t tell Rachel the answers. Instead, he simply tells her what to study. Rachel studies and she passes the exam. To me, the important thing is that Rachel studied. To be honest, I don’t see what the big deal is.
The show argues that, since Rachel didn’t know that Brian had seen the exam and didn’t realize that she had “cheated” (instead, she just assumed that Brian had good instincts), Rachel will now think that all she has to do is cram the night before a test and she’ll do well. But again, so what? That’s what most people do. That’s what I did and I had a great time in college. Seriously, when you’re in school, you shouldn’t be worried about grades. You should be worried about having the fun that you’re no longer going to be allowed to have after you graduate.
In the end, a guilt-stricken Brian confesses to Mr. Belding and he gets suspended for two days. As for Rachel, she’s told that she can take a makeup exam. But why should Rachel be punished when she actually did study the first time and she didn’t know that Brian had seen the test?
This is a dumb episode. I haven’t even talked about Screech asking Tommy, Bobby, and Lindsay to fake school emergencies so that Screech can “solve” them and hopefully get a good evaluation from Mr. Belding. (Screech is cheating too! But the show seems to think it’s only bad when Rachel gets an A.) If you’re in high school and you’re reading this, go ahead and cheat. Your teachers are too burned out to care and won’t even remember you were in their class after the school year ends. Enjoy your life.
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!
This week, Ponch meets David Caruso.
Episode 6.12 “Hot Date”
(Dir by John Florea, originally aired on January 9th, 1983)
Ponch, whose fiancée was tragically killed just four episodes ago, is super-excited because his new girlfriend is going to be in town for the weekend. Lori (Catherine Hickland) is a flight attendant and, from the dialogue, it sounds like she and Ponch have been an item for a while. So, was Ponch seeing her while he was engaged? What a jerk!
Unfortunately, Jake (Brendan Burns) and Charlie (David Caruso) are also in town. Jake was busted and sent to prison by Ponch and Bobby. (That’s kind of weird since Bobby is still in his probationary period and hasn’t even been with the Highway Patrol for more than a year. Maybe it was a short prison sentence.) Now that Jake’s out, he wants revenge. He and Charlie take Ponch, Lori, and the annoying housekeeper (Ivy Bethune) hostage in Ponch’s apartment.
Meanwhile, at headquarters, Bobby and Kathy (Tina Gayle), talk two runaways (Brad Savage and Michelle Riskas) into returning home. Kathy also receives flowers from a unknown man. (The first set of flowers is delivered by someone wearing a gorilla suit.) Kathy’s unknown admirer turns up at the station. It turns out to be an old widower (Phil Silvers) to whom Kathy was once polite.
While all of this is going on, Getraer tires to impress the captain (John Ericson) during the station’s annual inspection. I guess he manages to do that, despite Grossman having an expired driver’s license and Officer Webster (Clarence Gildyard, Jr.) getting mud on his car while chasing a criminal. (Was Webster just supposed to let the criminal escape so the car would stay clean?) The whole inspection plot just kind of disappears.
The majority of this episode deals with Ponch being held hostage and it’s pretty dreary. As I’ve explained many times in the past, I absolutely hate episodes that feature people being held hostage because it’s always the same thing. Ponch tries to negotiate. Jake yells a lot. Charlie is dumb but loyal. It’s nothing that hasn’t been done a hundred times in the past. It’s boring. Eventually, Bobby calls the apartment and Ponch is able to tip him off that something’s happening. Bobby, Getraer, and Bruce show up to take down the bad guys.
For whatever reason, everyone overacts in this episode. In the role of Ponch’s houseskeeper, Ivy Bethune is almost unbearable. David Caruso also goes more than a little overboard as Charlie. Unfortunately, none of it does anything to liven up a fairly dull episode.
by B.N. Clark
If you’re a baseball fan, today was an exciting day. Two games were played and both of them ended with an upset victory.
In Game 2 of the NLCS, the Brewers won their second game in a row by a score of 7 to 4. If the Brewers ended up winning the National League pennant over the Dodgers, it’ll be both a huge upset and it will also be the team’s first time to go to the World Series.
Meanwhile, in Game 1 of the ALCS, the Guardians defeated the favor Ray by a score of 7-3. I was cheering for the Rays but I like the Guardians too so this series is almost a win-win for me.
Personally, I’m hoping for a Brewers vs Rays World Series because it would be a first World Series appearance for both teams. I’d love to see some history made!
For now, congratulations to both the Brewers and the Guardians!
