Lisa Marie’s Six Favorite Super Bowl Commercials!


As you may know, if you’re one of our longtime readers, I only watch the Super Bowl for one reason.  Right now, I know that at least three TSL contributors are happy because the Patriots won.  And I know that at least one is upset that the Falcons lost.  But me — all I care about are the commercials.

What were the commercials like this year?  They weren’t terrible.  As tends to happen with Super Bowl commercials, quite a few of them tried way too hard.  A lot of people are going to go crazy praising the more political of the commercials.  A few commercials attempted to comment on everything that’s going on in this country right now.  That’s their right but I always find it amusing when big, faceless corporations spend millions on commercials bragging about how progressive they supposedly are.

That said, it was fairly easy for me to pick my six favorite commercials this year.  It was also pretty easy for me to pick my least favorite commercial.  Seriously, Febreze, what the Hell?

Here’s my top six.  I’m not saying that these commercials would convince me to buy or do anything.  But they did amuse me and that’s the important thing!

6) Yellow Tail Wine

I hardly ever drink so I don’t have any idea whether Yellow Tail is a good wine or not.  To be honest, I really don’t care.  Nothing bores me more than when people start getting all technical and in-depth about wine.  The important thing is that the kangaroo is cute.

In fact, he’s almost as cute as the beaver in this 2008 commercial from Australia.

5) Tide

“I know, you’re trending.”  This made me laugh out loud.

4) Bai

Christopher Walken and Justin Timberlake need to do more commercials together.

3) Wix.Com

Speaking of pairings that unexpectedly work, I hope that Gal Gadot and Jason Statham will return for this commercial’s sequel.

Finally, for my top two spots, I have to admit that I’ve gone back and forth as to which one of these commercials should come in first and which should come in second.  I was even tempted to declare a tie but, in the end, one commercial managed to cling to the top spot.

First, here’s the runner-up:

2) Snickers

This commercial didn’t get much attention in the days leading up to the game.  It probably didn’t cost a lot to make.  It wasn’t trendy.  It wasn’t flashy. It most definitely wasn’t political.  But, by highlighting the absurdity of Super Bowl commercials, it nearly won the night.  (Plus, it features Adam Driver and who doesn’t love that?)

And finally, my pick for the best commercial of Super Bowl LI…

(Drum roll, please…)

1) Squarespace

John Malkovich!

Lisa’s 6 Favorite Commercials of Super Bowl 2016!


So, as our longtime readers know, the only reason I ever watch the Super Bowl is for the commercials.  Every year, I post my 6 favorite Super Bowl commercials.  Now, I have to be honest, it’s hard to pick 6 from this year’s crop.  This was a seriously bland year!  There were no sexy commercials.  There were no secretly subversive commercials.  There were no commercials so offensive that I simply had to post them just to be annoying.

Instead, we got stuff like the Super Bowl Babies.  And I know that a lot of people loved the Super Bowl Babies but … bleh.  Seriously, it was a really creepy and kind of annoying commercial and I refuse to believe that anyone actually enjoyed it.  I think people saw the babies and thought, “Oh, I have to enjoy this or else it means I don’t love babies.”  The babies were cute but the commercial was super creepy.

And then there was this stupid Puppy Monkey Baby thing.  What the Hell was that supposed to be!?

I have to say — if I was going to have a pet that was half baby, that’s not the half that I would want.

Anyway, I did finally manage to come up with 6 that I did like.  And here they are!  Please understand that being include on this list does not mean that this site or any author of this site is saying that you should use any of the services or products being advertised.  In fact, seeing as how we’re not getting any money for highlighting this excellent commercials, I would suggest that you not use anything featured in these commercials.

Here are the commercials:

6) Coca-Cola: Little Marvels

Those little minicans drive me crazy and I refuse to allow them in either the house or here at the TSL offices.  Just a few days ago, Leonard try to stock some in the break room fridge and I spent the next few hours pouring them all out on the floor just to make a point!  But, taking all that into consideration, I still like this ad because … well, Ant-Man’s cute.

5) Kia: Walken Closet

I liked this one because it featured Christopher Walken and … well, that’s pretty much the only reason.  But it’s a good reason!  If nothing else, it kept me from thinking about how much I hate car commercials.  I hope Walken does a truck commercial next because I want him to explain what torque means.

4) T-Mobile — Drop The Balls

I liked this one because 1) Steve Harvey has a good sense of humor about traumatizing Miss Colombia and 2) it makes fun of Verizon.  Seriously, Verizon commercials are so smug!  Anyway, you tell them, Steve and keep praying for all us heathens.

3) Avocados From Mexico: Avos In Space

I really enjoyed this ad.  I’ll probably hate it after I see it another 100 times but for now, good job!

2) Prius: Getaway Car

I’m still trying to get the Dazzling Erin to buy a Prius so I can make fun of her for getting one.  But, after seeing this commercial, I now understand that a Prius is also a great car to own if you’re planning on fleeing from the police.  Seeing as how I always root for the guy being chased whenever there’s a high-speed police chase, I appreciated this feature of the car.  Add to that, I love the way that the Prius 4 become celebrities because that’s exactly what would happen in real life.

1) T-Mobile: Restricted Bling

It’s Jimmy!  And he can walk again!

And that’s it for this year!  Next year, advertisers, let’s bring back the sexy and the pretentious, okay?  It’ll make it a lot easier to make out a list.

Lisa 6 Favorite 2015 Super Bowl Commercials!


While I did watch the Super Bowl tonight, I have to admit that I only watched it for the commercials.  Back in 2013, I did a post on my favorite super bowl commercials and I meant to do the same thing for 2014 but, for whatever reason, I never got around to doing so.  So, I was definitely not going to miss out this year!

Unfortunately, the commercials really weren’t that great this year.  Perhaps if I was looking for a new car, the constant barrage of car commercials would have been more interesting.  I found a lot of the so-called “empowering” commercials to be condescending.  (To be honest, I always resent the idea that I need a commercial to make me feel good about myself.  I’m stronger than that.)  The McDonald’s commercial where people got free food for telling their mom that they loved them upset me because my mom’s not here for me to tell her how much I love her.  And then there were all the commercials about fathers bonding with their sons (never their daughters, interestingly enough) and those made me want to throw stuff as well.

In fact, when all is said and done, my favorite part of the Super Bowl was not watching that commercials.  Instead, it was watching the dancing sharks.

Dance, Shark, dance!

Dance, Shark, dance!

But there were a few commercials that stood out.  For example, there was the Nationwide dead kid commercial, which made me feel like a terrible person because I started giggling as soon as I saw that the TV had fallen over.  And then there was that GoDaddy commercial that was so offensive that it didn’t even make it to air.  (The commercial featured a lost puppy who, upon finally making his way back home, discovers that he’s being sold online.  Dear GoDaddy, I hate you and your asinine commercials.  Stop trying to be edgy, ‘kay?  Okay.)

Oh!  And don’t forget the Nissan commercial about the NASCAR driver who is a crappy father but then makes up for it by showing up at his son’s school in a new car.

My boyfriend actually paid more attention to the game than the commercials, which is like totally the wrong way to do the Super Bowl if you ask me.  But, for the record, his favorite ad was the Victoria’s Secret Super Bowl commercial.  I’m just happy that he got something out of the game.

Anyway, here are my 6 top Super Bowl commercials.

6) Liam Neeson for Clash of Clans

I really don’t know much about Clash of Clans but this commercial made me laugh because this is how I’ve always imagined Liam Neeson passes the time between Taken movies.

5) Pierce Brosnan for Kia

This is actually one of the few car commercials that I actually enjoyed.  Pierce is aging well and appears to have a pretty good sense of humor about how his career will always be defined by James Bond.

4) Nationwide — Invisible Mindy

Everyone was so traumatized by the Nationwide Dead Kid commercial that the Invisible Mindy commercial kinda got lost in the shuffle.  That’s a shame because it’s actually pretty clever.  What really made the commercial, for me, was the Matt Damon cameo at the end.  It was appropriate because Mindy first came to prominence when she and a friend wrote and performed a play called “Ben and Matt,” which told the story of Matt’s bromance with Ben Affleck.

3) The Snickers Machete Bunch Commercial

Danny Trejo and Steve Buscemi!  Need I say more?

2) The Budweiser Puppy Commercial!

This one made me cry.

1) NO MORE’s Official Super Bowl Ad

And finally, here’s my top ad.  This one was powerful and important and all it was selling was hope for a better future.

The Super Bowl XLVIII ads kick off…


…and there hasn’t even been a commercial yet. Ok, I admit this might seem petty on the surface, but I’m pretty goddamn pissed off. Over the years, I’ve experienced Super Bowl advertisements degenerate from clever, creative entertainment to raunchy, sensationalist garbage, and I’ve accepted it. I’ve seen right-wing nut jobs fork over millions to air their political garbage–anyone recall Focus on the Family’s anti-abortion ad a few years ago?–and I’ve kept my mouth shut. But what I saw in the pre-game show today took tasteless to a new level. For those of you who missed it, Fox got the rights to the game this year, and they exploited their control of the content to interrupt pre-game coverage for a half hour of Fox News and Bill O’Reilly lambasting the president.

Think about that, and forget your opinion of Barrack Obama while you do it. We’re talking about the most televised event in the world, and its exclusive broadcaster this year has set aside tens of millions of dollars worth of content time to advertise for the extreme right wing of the Republican party. “Oh, Bill O’Reilly is relatively moderate, and they just plastered a Fox News logo over it; they didn’t bring up many sensitive issues.” Fuck that. If the KKK sponsored a Super Bowl ad for white hoodies you’d all be shitting bricks. And this isn’t a conventional ad–a business transaction–a hunk of advertisement paid for in full. This is coming directly from the network that ought to be responsible for monitoring advertisement content throughout the game. This isn’t a matter of turning a blind eye for a pay check; Fox shamelessly wants you to know that this program has been brought to you by good, god-fearing straight white people (and their wives).

I suppose they’re not going to lose any viewers over it. I’m still watching–albeit on mute now until the ball’s on the ground–and the money’s already on the books anyway. It was just more dope for the already brainwashed really, and a little salt in the wound for anyone who believes in social justice. But if the NFL accepts without further comment that an endorsement of Fox Sports means an endorsement of Fox News and everything that subsidiary stands for, it’s time we all called it a fun half-century and took up soccer or cricket or something.

My favorite Super Bowl commercials


And the winner is… Well, we all know the score. Congratulations to Baltimore, and I hope to see San Francisco back in the championship in 2014. But that’s not what I’m posting about. Normally my entertainment niche is music, but I had to voice my opinion for a change on the best Super Bowl commercials of XLVII. Super Bowl commercials today might be pathetic compared to years gone by, but one company in particular had me awkwardly laughing my ass off twice tonight. Who’d have thought it would be a company I typically associate with some of the most annoying, stupid commercials on television? My pick for the best Super Bowl commercials of 2013 goes to Go Daddy. Enjoy.

I have to give a runner up shoutout to the Willem Dafoe Mercedes-Benz commercial. Maybe you’ll be hearing more about that one later.