Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, Bobby goes undercover!

Episode 4.14 “Inferno”

(Dir by Sara Rose, originally aired on January 17th, 1999)

TC is on vacation but, before he leaves, he tasks Cory with discovering who is selling heroin at a trendy nightclub.  To be honest, that sounds like a job for the Narcotics Squad but whatever.  Cory tasks Bobby and Monica with going undercover.  Monica starts to hang out at the club.  Bobby gets a job as a bouncer.  It’s amazing how the same two cops can somehow both patrol the same small stretch of land and also continually work undercover without anyone ever recognizing them.  Their presence at the club still doesn’t prevent a rock star from overdosing or an actor from later shooting himself in front of Monica.

Meanwhile, Cory and Amy ride their stupid bikes around Santa Monica and harass drug addicts.   Amy catches one addict and says that he hasn’t been looking too good lately.  Amy has only been a member of the bike patrol for a few months so why is she acting like she’s been on this show for years?  As silly as the undercover work is, Pacific Blue is still at its most ludicrous when it tries to make the bike cops look like a bunch of badasses,

Bobby’s ex-girlfriend, Rita (Heather Marie Marsden), turns up singing at the club.  Despite Monica warning that Bobby is making a mistake, he allows himself to fall for Rita again despite the fact that Rita is now dating club owner Gary Fein (Scott Paetty), the man who is suspected of being Santa Monica’s biggest heroin dealer.  Of course, it turns out that Rita is the drug dealer.  Eventually, Bobby has to kill his ex-girlfriend to keep her from shooting his fellow bike cops.  Bobby is almost as upset about that as Slater was over losing his salamander.

The episode ends with a Cory/Bobby conversation.  Cory asks if Bobby was in love with Rita and Bobby admits that he had feelings for her.  The scene suggests that Cory and Bobby are secretly a couple.  If I was Cory, I would be hesitant about dating someone who killed his last girlfriend.

TC returns and tells Cory that she did a good job running the department.  Cory thanks him and then looks sad as the episode ends.  If she really felt that way about Bobby, why did she send him undercover in the first place?  Why not send in Granger?  Actually, is Granger still a character on this show?  I haven’t seen him in a while.

This is a dumb show.  You already knew that.  This episode served as a reminder that, along with being dumb, no one on this show is particularly good at their job.  Bobby goes undercover and allows his emotions to get the better of him …. again!  Monica goes undercover and actually does a good job but Cory won’t acknowledge it because she hates Monica …. still!  Amy rides around on her bicycle and harasses people like a corrupt deputy in a drive-in movie.  The fact that everyone is on bicycles just makes everything all the more ridiculous.

Santa Monica, you deserve better!