4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Jack Nicholson Edition


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today is Jack Nicholson’s 89th birthday!

It’s been sixteen years since Jack Nicholson last appeared in a movie, the forgettable How Do You Know.  And yet, he remains a screen icon with a filmography that is a cinema lover’s dream.  He’s worked with everyone from Roger Corman to Stanley Kubrick to Milos Forman to Martin Scorsese and, along the way, he’s become a symbol of a very American type of rebel.  Though often associated with the counter-culture, his style has always been too aggressive and idiosyncratic for him to be a believable hippie.  Instead, he’s one of the last of the beats, an outsider searching for meaning in Americana.

Happy birthday, Jack Nicholson.  May you have many happy returns!

4 Shots From 4 Jack Nicholson Films

Easy Rider (1969, dir by Dennis Hopper, DP: Laszlo Kovacs)

Chinatown (1974, dir by Roman Polanski, DP: John A. Alonzo)

The Shining (1980, dirby Stanley Kubrick, DP: John Alcott)

The Departed (2006, dir by Martin Scorsese, DP: Michael Ballhaus)

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 3.22 “Best Laid Plans”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This week, season 3 comes to an end.

Episode 3.22 “Best Laid Plans”

(Dir by John B. Moranville, originally aired on April 19th, 1998)

Heh heh …. they said laid.

The third season finale of Pacific Blue finds everyone at a crossroads, almost as if the showrunners weren’t sure who would be back for the fourth season so they wanted to make sure that everyone had an excuse to leave.  There’s a lot of personal drama in this episode and I guess it would be compelling if any of these people were the least bit likable or sympathetic.

Victor Del Toro is being investigated by Internal Affairs and he spends the majority of the episode telling people that he suspects that he’s going to lose his job.

Cory is dumped by her long-distance boyfriend and leaps into a new relationship with some guy she accidentally punched at a bar.  (She was trying to hit his friend, who was being pretty obnoxious at the time.)

Chris takes a pregnancy test and it’s positive.  TC asks her to marry him.  Despite the fact that Chris was previously hoping TC would ask her to marry him, Chris says no because …. well, because Chris is the worst.  No, actually, it’s because Chris doesn’t want TC to marry her just because he feels like he has to.  Chris and TC have separate scenes where they imagine how wonderful it would be to have a baby and how annoying it will be once the baby grows up to be a bratty teenager.  But then Chris finds out that it was a false positive.

Palermo, meanwhile, is burned out.  He’s feeling old.  He wants to do more than just look at crime scenes.  Plus, he’s having sex with a 22 year-old (played by Saved By The Bell: The Next Class’s Sarah Lancaster) and he’d rather do that then go to work.

Sadly, Palermo does have to go to work.  A gang of criminals is breaking into people’s home and carving letters on their foreheads.  (The letters correspond to their last name — Edwards gets an E and so on.)  It turns out that the leader of the gang blame Palermo for his mother’s death and is spelling out P-A-L-E-R-M-O.  The bad guys are always one step ahead because a member of the gang (Ginny Shcrieber) is working as a receptionist at Pacific Blue headquarters.  Do they not do background checks before hiring people?

Palermo does catch the guy, though only after several people have been permanently scarred.  Once again, you have to wonder why the bike cops are the only people working these cases.  Add that the end of the episode, Palermo announces he’s going to Italy.

That’s one down and four more to go!  Who will be around for season 4?

We’ll find out next week!

Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell: The New Class 1.12 “Tommy A”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00.  The show is currently on Prime.

It’s midterms!

Episode 1.12 “Tommy A”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 27th,1993)

Tommy D has got his driver’s license!

Everyone’s excited because Tommy’s father has promised to buy him a car and that means Tommy will be able to drive them everywhere.  Keep in mind, no one is excited for Tommy.  Instead, they’re just excited that they’re going to get a chauffeur who is too dumb to realize that he’s being taken advantage of.  Consider this your reminder that the first season of Saved By The Bell: The New Class featured some of the least likable character to ever appear on a dopey teenage sitcom.

Uh-oh, Tommy’s father is concerned about Tommy’s terrible grades.  He informs Tommy (and, for some reason, Mr. Belding) that, unless Tommy gets at least one A on his midterms, he won’t get his car.

The gang tries to come up with a class that Tommy could do well in.  This is kind of dumb as it’s already been established that Tommy is an amazing mechanic and that he takes autoshop.  He’s also a jock and therefore, he should do well in his physical education class.  The gang, however, decides to get Tommy an A in his science class.  Because the teacher grades on a curve, the gang tells the nerds in the class that they have the answers to the midterm and that they’ll signal which answer is correct by coughing.  By giving the nerds the wrong answers, they’ll help Tommy get an A….

So, to be clear here …. I mean, what the Hell?  Seriously, who comes up with a plan like this?  Wouldn’t the teacher notice that there are a lot of extra students in the class on the day of the midterm and that they’re all coughing in unison?  As well, it’s one thing to try to help Tommy pass.  It’s another thing to try to make a bunch of other students fail.  Not even Zack Morris would have gone that far.  (As I’ve mentioned before, the first season of Saved By The Bell: The New Class has been oddly mean-spirited.)

It doesn’t matter, though.  Tommy still flunks his science midterm.  Now, he only has one chance left to get an A and it’s in …. ENGLISH!

Oh my God, how difficult is the English midterm going to be?  Apparently, the entire grade will be determined by each student standing in front of the class and giving a one minute speech.  What?  What type of class is this?

Luckily, Scott and Weasel have a scheme.  Weasel dresses up like a janitor and he convinces Mr. Snavely, the strict English teacher, that it would be dangerous to enter his classroom.  Mr. Belding steps in to give and grade the English midterm.  Scott figures that Belding will go easy on Tommy and Scott is right.  Tommy speaks for less than a minute and basically says that everyone should just be themselves.  Belding gives the speech an A.  TOMMY’S GETTING A CAR!

And Megan realizes that she doesn’t have to play dumb to get boys to like her.  That was the episode’s B-plot.  It was pretty dumb and required Megan to behave in a way that was totally out-of-character.

Anyway, Tommy D is now Tommy A.  He thanks his friends for helping him.  Hey, Tommy, they just want a ride!

Next week, the first season ends!

 

Song of the Day: Maria, performed by the UNT One O’Clock Lab Band


Texas Flag, by Erin Nicole

Since today is San Jacinto Day, it seems appropriate that today’s song of the day should come from Texas!

Here is the University of North Texas’s One O’Clock Lab band performing Maria at the Addison Jazz Festival.

Scenes That I Love: Bernie


Happy San Jacinto Day!

You can celebrate by watching my favorite scene from Richard Linklater’s Bernie!  I really love this quick lesson about my home state:

By the way, that line about “Dallas snobs,” always got a big laugh from the audiences at the Dallas Angelika.  It’s important to have a sense of humor.

Don’t worry, Vermont.  You’ll learn how to laugh at yourself someday.

 

4 Shots From 4 Films: Another Special Texas Edition


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today is San Jacinto Day, which means that it is once again time for….

4 Shots From 4 Texas Films

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974, dir by Tobe Hooper, DP: Daniel Pearl)

Slacker (1991, dir by Richard Linklater, DP: Lee Daniel)

Office Space (1999, dir by Mike Judge, DP: Tim Suhrstedt)

Upstream Color (2013, dir by Shane Carruth, DP: Shane Carruth)

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 5.16 “Battle of the Bands”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

This week, it’s a musical conflict!

Episode 5.16 “Battle of the Bands”

(Dir by Leslie H. Martinson, originally aired on January 31st, 1982)

Jon Baker cannot understand the appeal of punk rock.  He says that the punk rockers all seem to be suburban kids so why are they so angry?  They’re not from “the ghetto,” as Baker puts it.

“Suburbs can be a ghetto too, Jon.” Grossie says.

Grossie, who is definitely my favorite member of the Highway Patrol, explains that he likes to keep up with youth culture and, as a result, he understands the difference between Punk and New Wave.  Punk rockers have fans who slam dance while New Wave bands have fans who pogo.  Grossie demonstrates how to do each dance while the other members of the Highway Patrol watch.  When Getraer demands to know why Grossie is slamming himself against the lockers in the locker room, Grossie proceeds to hop out of the room.

This is all important information for Baker to have because there’s a Battle of the Bands coming up.  New Waver Snow Pink (Susan Richardson) is eager to win but her guitars were recently stolen out of her band’s van.  Unfortunately, Snow Pink has been targeted by Pain, a punk band that is led by Thrasher (William Forsythe).  Thrasher doesn’t care about making good music.  All he wants to do is cause trouble!

Now, I will say that Thrasher is kind of intimidating.  That’s more due to him being played by a young William Forsythe than anything else.  He’s a “punk,” which, in the world of CHiPs, means that he has a mohawk and his two bandmates have shaved heads.  (If anything, they look more like Neo-Nazis than punk rockers.  Johnny Rotten would have kicked them out of a moving car.)  That said, when Thrasher flicks his lighter and talks about trashing the club, you believe that there’s a very good chance that he’ll do just that.  Fortunately, the Highway Patrol is there to stop him.

Now, as you probably already guessed, there was no way that CHiPs was going to do a Battle of the Bands episode without giving Ponch a band.  Ponch competes and he sings Kool & The Gang’s Celebration.  It’s disco vs punk vs new wave!  Of course, punk doesn’t really get to compete because the band is arrested.  And Ponch really can’t win because then his character would have an excuse to leave the show.  So, it’s not a shock when Snow Pink wins the Battle of the Bands.

To be absolutely honest, this episode was surprisingly fun.  It was definitely an episode of its era, embracing both music and the moral panic of the 80s.  The punks were unconvincing.  Snow Pink was actually a pretty good singer.  Estrada flashed that blinding grin while singing disco.  Baker once again comes close to getting a romantic subplot.  Grossie gets a monologue about the ideology of punk rock.  What’s not to like?  Bury this episode in the ground because it’s a time capsule!

One final note: Baker, at one point, says that Ponch might leave the Highway Patrol to pursue his musical career.  It’s impossible not to hear the note of hope in Larry Wilcox’s voice.

Retro Television Review: Making It Legal 1.1 “Pilot”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On this Monday, I will be reviewing Making It Legal, which aired once on ABC in 2007 and then never aired again.

Last Monday, I finished up Miami Vice.  For the rest of the week, I was busy.  This weekend, I was even busier.  That’s a polite way of saying that I haven’t had a chance to settle on a new Monday series.  However, I did find a show that only lasted one episode.  So, let’s take a quick look at 2007’s Making It Legal.

Episode 1.1 “Pilot”

(Dir by Gary Halvorson, originally aired on January 31st, 2007)

At the high-powered law firm of Kolar, Dalton, Babbit & Leahy, Josh (Scott Wolf) and Julie (Ashley Williams) are the leaders of the Blue Team, one of the firm’s eight litigation groups.  Both Josh and Julie are hoping to someday be promoted to a partnership.  They’re friends but they also understand that only one of them can become a partner.  Josh is a little uptight and tends to push himself and those around him too much.  Julie is neurotic in the way that most professional women on network sitcoms in days immediately following Friends were neurotic.  One night, after a long day of hard work, Josh and Julie gave in too temptation and made love all over the office.  The sitcom picks up the morning after.  Josh doesn’t want anyone to find out about their one night stand.  Julie agrees and then tells her friend Elise (Ayda Field) who proceeds to tell paralegal Theressa (Kym Whitley)….

Meanwhile, Mr. Kolar (Robert Wagner) has hired Trevor (Ben Savage) and assigned him to work with Josh.  Trevor is the son of a legendary attorney and he’s eager to escape from his father’s shadow.  He’s neurotic because everyone on this show is neurotic.  Josh doesn’t want to work with Trevor and he proceeds to give Trevor a huge amount of files to go through.

Meanwhile, Ethan (Geoffrey Arend), the weird guy of the blue group, continually does bad celebrity impersonations.  I mean really, really bad.  What makes it even worse is that I don’t think they’re meant to be bad.  On a sitcom where every joke is telegraphed and all of the dialogue hits with the subtlety of a sledge hammer, no one mentions that Ethan’s impersonations are bad.  There’s no way this show would have passed up the chance to point out that Ethan’s Christopher Walken impersonation sounds nothing like Christopher Walken.

Watching this pilot, it’s easy to see why Making It Legal didn’t become a regular series.  The pilot is bad, sluggishly paced and not particularly engaging.  Scott Wolf and Ashley Williams have no chemistry.  Ayda Field and Kym Whitley are stuck playing characters who have no personality.  Geoffrey Arend’s character is a bunch of quirks that add up to nothing.  And then you’ve got Ben Savage, who has never been a particularly good actor but who at least knows how to deliver hackneyed sitcom dialogue.  Unfortunately, Trevor still isn’t a particularly likable character.  At one point, he falls asleep on a couch and misses the start of a very important meeting.  Of course, a panicked Trevor runs into the conference room and promptly trips and falls to the floor.  My reaction was that Trevor should have been fired on the spot.

The laugh track disagreed with me, though.  This pilot has one of the most intrusive laugh tracks that I have ever heard.  Every line of dialogue is followed by canned laughter.  Whenever anyone steps into a room, we hear laughter.  When people leave a room, we hear laughter.  Nothing funny has been said.  Nothing funny has happened.  But if enough laughter is heard on the soundtrack, maybe we can be fooled into thinking something funny has happened.

Probably the only thing that really did work about the pilot was the casting of Robert Wagner.  Wagner wanders through the action with a permanent scowl.  He doesn’t appear to be in a good mood.  It’s hard not to sympathize with him.

Next week, I’ll start reviewing a show that lasted more than one episode!

Patrick Muldoon, RIP


This morning, I was saddened to read about the passing of actor Patrick Muldoon.  He died of a heart attack yesterday.  He was 57 years old.

Patrick Muldoon will always be remembered by many for playing Jeff, the “frat boy babe stealer” from Saved By The Bell.  Personally, I thought Jeff and Kelly made for a cute couple and it always bothered me that the show’s writers suddenly changed Jeff from being a nice guy to being a cheater just so Kelly and Zack could (eventually) get back together.  Supposedly, years after the show aired, Muldoon still had strangers yelling at him on the street for breaking up Kelly and Zack.  I felt bad for him reading that.  The man was an actor and he did a good job.

Muldoon went on to play an important supporting role in Starship Troopers, making him the second Saved By The Bell actor to appear in a Paul Verhoeven film.  (Unlike Elizabeth Berkley, Muldoon at least seemed to understand that he was appearing in a satire.)  He also appeared in a countless number of Lifetime films, occasionally sharing the screen with Starship Troopers co-star, Casper Van Dien.  Muldoon was also the first actor to play Austin Reed on Days of Our Lives.  

Here he is in Starship Troopers, getting into a memorable fight with Casper Van Dien.

 

Join #MondayMania For Wrong Swipe!


Hi, everyone!  Tonight, on twitter, I will be hosting one of my favorite films for #MondayMania!  Join us for 2016’s Wrong Swipe!

You can find the movie on Prime and Tubi and then you can join us on twitter at 9 pm central time!  (That’s 10 pm for you folks on the East Coast.)  See you then!