FAST-WALKING – James Woods and Kay Lenz light up the screen!


One of the first movies I ever watched starring James Woods is COP. It’s a 1988 action thriller about a police detective on the trail of a serial killer. I really enjoyed the movie, which was directed by James B. Harris. Harris is a producer and director whose various credits include THE KILLING (1956), PATHS OF GLORY (1957), LOLITA (1962) and TELEFON (1977, with Charles Bronson). Harris also directed James Woods in a movie from 1981 called FAST-WALKING. 

FAST-WALKING is about a prison guard named Frank “Fast-Walking” Minniver. He loves to smoke pot and dream about a future life in a beautiful part of Oregon. In order to make that move, though, he needs to make some money. When a black revolutionary named William Galliot is transferred to his prison, he finds himself with some options, as he receives offers of money from two different sides. On one side is his cousin Wasco, a prison trustee who offers Fast-Walking $25,000 to kill the revolutionary as part of a staged prison race riot. On the other side is Galliot’s own people who offer him a bag of money containing $50,000 if he’ll help Galliot escape. The biggest obstacle to taking the bigger payday is that Wasco threatens to kill Fast-Walking’s lady love Moke, if he doesn’t make the right choice.

The cast is phenomenal in FAST-WALKING beginning with James Woods as the title character. In his best roles, Woods is somewhat morally ambiguous, and we hope he makes the right decisions at the end. This definitely fits that mold. Kay Lenz was sexy as hell as Moke. We’re not supposed to be sure if she’s just using Fast-Walking or if she truly loves him. She plays that balance well. In a surprising turn of events, M. Emmet Walsh gives the most memorable performance of his career, and it doesn’t have a thing to do with his acting. Rather, he does a full frontal nude scene. I’d like to forget this performance, but it’s burned into my psyche at this point. Tim McIntire was the revelation to me, though, as Fast-Walking’s inmate cousin Wasco. This is the only role I really know him from, and he absolutely nails it. The fate of his character is one of the most satisfying parts of the entire film. Unfortunately, McIntire would suffer from drug and alcohol addiction and would pass away a few years after completing his role in FAST-WALKING. I can’t help but think there could have been more great performances if his career would have been longer. 

I recommend FAST-WALKING. It’s not a perfect film, but James Woods, Kay Lenz, and Tim McIntire all make it worth watching. 

TRUE BELIEVER -James Woods & Robert Downey, Jr. take on the system!


I’ve been going through my movies and re-watching some of my favorites. A movie that clearly falls into that category is TRUE BELIEVER starring James Woods and Robert Downey, Jr. I became a fan of James Woods around 1988 primarily based on the strength of two action films that he worked on around that time, those being BEST SELLER (1987) and COP (1988). I spent hours combing through the rental selections at our local Hastings Entertainment store and I remember both of these movies being in the “New Release” section at the same time. They’re both hard hitting, violent films, and Woods is especially good in both. Being an obsessive completist, I found myself searching out the prior work of the star for some more good movies. It was during this time that TRUE BELIEVER was released to the theaters in February of 1989. I enjoy courtroom dramas, and knowing the intensity that Woods brings to his films, I had no doubt I would like it.

The story revolves around Eddie Dodd (Woods), an attorney who used to fight for the cause of the little guy, but now mostly finds himself protecting drug dealers from the law. Enter Roger Baron (Downey Jr.), a recent law school graduate who idolizes Dodd, and is now disappointed to see his legal hero reduced to his current cynical state. When a Korean mother comes into the law offices one day and says her son, Shu Kai Kim, has spent 8 years in prison for a crime he didn’t commit, cynical Dodd doesn’t want to take the case. Young Baron shames him into it though, and soon the two men find themselves taking on the New York District Attorney himself Robert Reynard (Kurtwood Smith) as they try to prove Shu Kai Kim’s innocence and help him taste freedom once more!

Often when people ask me to name my favorite James Woods film, I’ll quickly answer TRUE BELIEVER even though there are many good films to choose from. There are a few reasons for that. First, even though the film is a serious legal thriller with many dark undertones, director Joseph Ruben has given his movie a dark sense of humor. Woods and Downey, Jr. are able to find the humorous elements inherent in their characters and that brings some fun to the otherwise serious proceedings. Second, I really enjoy the story of underdogs taking on the big, bad system. Shu Kai Kim is an underdog who maintains his innocence when all the evidence appears flawlessly stacked against him. Eddie Dodd, the once feared civil rights lawyer who is now a hopeless burnout, is an underdog who appears to be out of his league as he goes up against the most powerful attorney in New York. These underdog story lines give us something to really root for as the story plays out. And finally, the performances are phenomenal from top to bottom. James Woods, an actor known for his electric intensity, is at the top of his game and Kurtwood Smith is a great adversary. Robert Downey, Jr. brings a bright-eyed enthusiasm to the role that compliments the cynical Woods nicely. And Yuji Okumoto as Shu Kai Kim shows us quite a transformation from a man who goes from almost being dead inside as a result of his eight years in prison, to a man who allows a glimmer of hope to seep in for a second chance. I think Okumoto is great in the role. The story takes many twists and turns and I enjoy every moment as it plays out.

TRUE BELIEVER is definitely one of my favorites!

Scenes That I Love: Prohibition’s Funeral From Once Upon A Time In America


Once Upon A Time In America (1984, dir by Sergio Leone, DP: Tonino Delli Colli)

Change comes with a new year.  That’s just an inevitable fact of life.  Sometimes, it’s good chance and sometimes, it’s bad change and sometimes, it’s change that is both good and bad.  That’s certainly the case with today’s scene that I love.

In Serigo Leone’s 1984 masterpiece, Once Upon A Time In America, 1933 brings with it the end of prohibition.  While the nation celebrates the right to once again legally drink, gangsters like the ones played by James Woods and Robert De Niro mourn the loss of their business and try to figure out a new way to pay their bills.

In this scene, Prohibition — that law that was hated by so many — is given a send-off by the people that it made very rich.

Film Review: Cop (dir by James B. Harris)


First released in 1988, Cop stars James Woods as Lloyd Hopkins, a homicide detective who does not …. wait for it …. GO BY THE BOOK!

Actually, has there ever been a movie about a homicide detective who always made sure to go by the book?  I’m sure there has been but I really can’t think of any off the top of my head.  Whenever a homicide detective shows up as the main character of a movie, you can be sure that he’s going to drink too much, carouse too much, and get yelled at by his superiors.  If the movie involves a serial killer, you can be sure that the detective and the killer are going to be mirror images of each other, two renegades who have found differing ways to work out their issues with the world.

As much as we talk about the cliché of the cop who does it his way, would we really want to see a movie about a cop who plays by the rules?  I mean, most people dread having to deal with cops.  It’s not just that cops usually bring bad news.  It’s also that dealing with a cop means having to spend a lot of time while they slowly and methodically go through all of their procedures.  There have been so many times that I’ve been pulled over speeding and I’ve just wanted to yell, “Just write the ticket!”  Most people agree that we need some sort of police force, regardless of what the Defund folks say.  But most people also hate following the rules, especially when those rules feel rather arbitrary.  That’s the appeal of the renegade cop.  The renegade cop fills a purpose in society but, at the same time, he dislikes dealing with all of the usual cop nonsense as much as the rest of us.

As for Lloyd Hopkins, he’s hyperactive, jittery, sleazy, and a terrible father and husband.  He cheats on his wife.  He tells his daughter all about the gory details of his job.  (His daughter, it should be noted, seems to enjoy hearing them.)  He obsesses on the crimes that he investigates and he pursues murderers with a fanaticism that suggests that Lloyd knows that he’s just one bad life choice away from becoming one of them himself.  (And, indeed, Lloyd kills quite a few people over the course of Cop, even allowing one person to get into another room and get a shotgun just so Lloyd will have an excuse to shoot him.)  Lloyd is someone who is dangerous to know but, at the same time, he’s also probably the only person who can stop the killer who is seemingly committing random murders in Los Angeles.

The plot is typical of films about obsessive detectives pursuing faceless killers but Cop stands out due to the director of James B. Harris and the lead performance of James Woods.  Harris creates an atmosphere of continual unease, one in which the viewers gets the feeling that anyone could become the killer’s next victim at any moment.  James Woods, meanwhile, plays Lloyd as being a live wire, someone who simply cannot stop thinking and talking because he knows that the minute he does, he’s going to have to take a serious look at the wreck of his life and his own less-than-stable behavior.  Lloyd may be a self-destructive bastard but he’s a compelling self-destructive bastard and, in this film’s version of Los Angeles, he’s about as close as one can get to avenging angel.  The film is full of good actors, like Charles Durning, Lesley Ann Warren, and Raymond J. Barry, but it is ultimately James Woods’s show.  Lloyd gets the film’s final line and it’s a killer but it works because, by the time he utters it, the viewer feels as if they have gotten to know Lloyd.

Cop is based on Blood on the Moon, a novel by James Ellroy.  I have not read that novel so I don’t know how closely Cop sticks to Ellroy’s original plot.  Nor do I know how James Ellroy felt about Cop, which was the first movie to be based on his work.  That said, Ellroy’s writing and Harris’s film share a dark vision of humanity and a subversive sense of humor.  Ellroy has often declared himself to be the world’s great crime novelist and, from what I’ve read of his work, I would tend to agree.  Cop is certainly not the greatest crime movie ever made (nor is it the best film to ever be adapted from Ellroy’s writing) but it’s still pretty damn good.

Live Tweet Alert: Join #FridayNightFlix for Diggstown!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on Twitter and Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, at 10 pm et, #FridayNightFlix has got 1992’s Diggstown!  When James Woods teams up with Lou Gossett, Jr., it’s time for boxing action!

If you want to join us this Friday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 10 pm et, and use the #FridayNightFlix hashtag!  It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.

Diggstown is available on Prime and Tubi!  See you there!

Retro Television Reviews: A Great American Tragedy (dir by J. Lee Thompson)


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay.  Today’s film is 1972’s A Great American Tragedy!  It  can be viewed on YouTube!

Brad Wilkes (George Kennedy) had a good career, working as an aerospace engineer.  He was able to buy a nice house.  With his wife, Gloria (Vera Miles), he was able to raise a good family.  He was even able to buy a sailboat, one that is the pride of the entire marina.  But then, one day, he’s told that the company is letting him go.

Returning to his home, Brad tells Gloria that he’s lost his job but that everything’s going to be okay because not only does he have a $10,000 pension but he’s sure he can find a new job.  “Of course, I might not be making $35,000 a year….” he says.

(Watching at home, I said, “Pfffft!  I make more than that!”  But, of course, Brad is talking about $35,000 in 1972 money, which would be the equivalent of a quarter of a million today.)

However, Brad soon discovers that getting a new job will not be as easy as he assumed.  It turns out that there are a lot of people out there looking for work and most of them are younger, cheaper, and better educated than Brad.  The bills start to pile up.  His former boss (Robert Mandan) informs Brad that his pension is going to be $7,000 less than he thought.  Brad forces himself to go down to the unemployment office so that he can collect $25 a week and then suffers the humiliation of being offered a loan by his well-meaning son-in-law (played by a youngish James Woods).  Gloria gets a job at the same clothing store where she used to shop and her lecherous boss (Kevin McCarthy) starts to hit on her.

For Brad, the final humiliation comes when he has to sell the boat.  A younger boat owner (Tony Dow, with a huge mustache) puts Brad in contact with a woman named Paula (Natalie Trundy).  Paula wants to buy the boat and, after they take it out on the water, Brad finds himself tempted to cheat on his wife.  It all gets to be too much for Brad and soon, he’s on a plane to Nevada where hopefully one good night at the craps table will be enough to pay his bills….

Watching this film, I found myself feeling very sorry for Brad while, at the same time, becoming very frustrated with him.  On the one hand, his company tossed him out after years of loyal service and then tried to screw him out of his pension.  On the other hand, Brad spent almost the entire movie in denial about how bad things actually were.  It’s one thing to be proud and it’s another to just be stubborn.  Knowing that he has next to no money, Brad still insists on throwing his annual 4th of July party and he even invites his former boss to come over and celebrate.  Brad simply cannot bring himself to admit that his old life is over but really, who can blame him?  He’s not the one who chose to be fired.

A Great American Tragedy was directed by J. Lee Thompson, who also did Cape Fear, The Guns of Navarone, the Planet of the Apes sequels, and several Charles Bronson films.  There are no fight scenes to be found in A Great American Tragedy but Thompson does get good performances from his cast and the film makes great use of George Kennedy’s likability.  The viewer remains sympathetic to Brad, even when he makes mistake after mistake.  A film about a formerly secure family suddenly discovering just how much the economy sucks, A Great American Tragedy remains just as a relevant today as when it was first made.

Retro Television Reviews: Welcome Back, Kotter 1.1 “The Great Debate” and 1.2 “Basket Case”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC  from 1975 to 1979.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

Well, I don’t have anyone but myself to blame.

Ever since I started doing these retro television reviews, people have been suggesting that I should review an old 70s sitcom called Welcome Back, Kotter.  I only knew a few things about Welcome Back, Kotter.  I knew that it was the show that made John Travolta a star.  I knew that it was Marcia’s favorite show on The Brady Bunch Hour.  I knew that Gabe Kaplan played Gabe Kotter, a teacher who returned to his old Brooklyn neighborhood to teach a bunch of students known as the “Sweathogs.”  (Bleh!  What an unappealing nickname.)  It didn’t sound like something I wanted to watch but, being the polite person that I am, I always said, “If it’s ever streaming somewhere, I will.”  The unspoken assumption, of course, was that the show would never be streaming anywhere.

Then, one day, I looked at Tubi and….

Again, I have no one to blame but myself.

As for the show, it was based on the stand-up routines of its star, Gabe Kaplan.  It followed former Sweathog Gabe Kotter (played, of course, by Kaplan) as he tried to teach a new generation of Sweathogs at James Buchanan High in Brooklyn.  Gabe was married to Julie (Marica Strassman).  They lived in a small Brooklyn apartment and Gabe was constantly forcing his wife to listen to corny jokes about his family.  At the school, Gabe’s principal was Mr. Woodman (John Sylvester White), a former history teacher who disliked the Sweathogs.

As for the Sweathogs themselves, there were several but only four were really important.

Vinnie Barbarino (John Travolta) was the handsome but dumb one.

Freddie Washington (Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs) was the cool basketball player who would often say, “Hi, there” in a very deep voice.

Juan Epstein (Robert Hegyes) was the one most likely to kill someone.

Arnold Horseshack (Ron Pallilo) was the nerdy one with the high-pitched voice.  In Kaplan’s original stand-up routine, his nickname was Arnold Horseshit but I doubt that was ever mentioned on the show.

And, of course, there was the theme song.  Welcome Back, Kotter was written and performed by John Sebastian, whose previous claim to fame was appearing on the stage at Woodstock while stoned out of his mind.

Okay, let’s do this thing.

Episode 1.1 “The Great Debate”

(Dir by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on September 9th, 1975)

The very first episode of Welcome Back, Kotter opens with teacher Gabe Kotter (Gabe Kaplan) making out with his wife, Julie (Marcia Strassman), on the couch in their little Brooklyn apartment.  Kotter suddenly stops kissing his wife so that he can tell her a joke about the time his uncle slept in the same bed as his secretary and told her that if she wanted to be “Mrs. Kotter for the night,” then she should get out of bed and close the bedroom window herself.  Julie laughs.  Personally, if my romantic partner stopped kissing me specifically so he could tell an adultery joke, I don’t know if I would laugh.  I’d probably be more like, “What are you trying to tell me with that?”

Fortunately, the theme song starts up and rescues the audience from that awkward moment.

The next day, Gabe goes to work at James Buchanan High School.  He teaches the remedial class, which is populated by underachieving students who have been nicknamed “the Sweathogs.”  Gabe discovers that the Sweathogs have painted a rather garish mural on the wall of the classroom.

Vinne Barbarino (John Travolta) gets up and explains what the mural’s about.

Gabe is impressed by the fact that young John Travolta is a hundred times better looking and charismatic than anyone else in the school.  But Gabe still insists that the Sweathogs wash off the mural.  The Sweathogs agree, before revealing that they also painted the top of Gabe’s desk.

In the teacher’s lounge, Alex (James Woods) makes fun of Gabe’s stupid students.  Gabe make fun of Alex for writing plays with names like “Fiddler On My Sister.”  Alex says that his debate class can defeat Gabe’s class.  Gabe accepts the challenge and….

Wait a minute!  JAMES WOODS!?

Yes, that is indeed a youngish James Woods playing Alex, the school’s pretentious drama teacher.  Woods is okay in the role.  There’s not a whole lot to be done with the character as he’s pretty much just an uptight strawman who is there to be humiliated by Kotter and his class.

As for the debate itself, the resolution is that “Humans are naturally aggressive.”  Alex’s class argues in the negative while Kotter’s class argues in the positive.  Alex’s class is uptight and wears sweaters.  The Sweathogs show up in garish costumes.  With the help of Epstein (Robert Hegyes), Barbarino argues that Jack the Ripper and Atilla the Hun prove that people are naturally aggressive.  When Mr, Woodman (John Sylvester White), who is moderating the debate, says that they need a timekeeper, Sweathog Arnold Horschack (Ron Pallilo) enthusiastically volunteers.

“Can he tell time, Mr. Kotter?” a flustered Woodman asks and I’ll admit that I did laugh.  John Sylvester White delivered the line perfectly.

Sweathog Freddie Washington (Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs) then makes his case but, because his only experience with public speaking is in church, he gives a sermon.  “He isn’t following the rules!” one of Alex’s students shouts.

While Alex’s star debater makes his case, the Sweathogs heckle him so aggressively that the student has a nervous breakdown and starts screaming, “SHUT UP!” at them.  As Kotter points out, this proves that humans are naturally aggressive.  Woodman announces that “This debate is called on account of dumbness.”

Back at the apartment, Gabe tells Julie a joke about Larry and his pet toad.

I have to admit that I enjoyed this episode quite a bit more than I was expecting to.  Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs, John Travolta, Ron Pallilo, and Robert Hegyes had a lot of comedic chemistry as the main Sweathogs and Gabe Kaplan did a good job of projecting a much needed sincerity in the role of Mr. Kotter.  He seemed to truly care about his students.  This was definitely a good episode to start the series off with.

Episode 1.2 “Basket Case”

(Dir by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on September 16th, 1975)

At the apartment, Gabe tells Julie a joke about how his childhood bully beat up his father.

At school, it’s time for the Sweathogs to take a history exam.  Barbarino has all the answers written on his arm but, fortunately, Gabe shows up with water and a paper towel.  Horseshack tries to distribute the tests in another classroom but Gabe stops him.  Epstein shows up with a note excusing him from the exam because of his bursitis but Gabe tosses the note away as soon as he notices that it is signed “Epstein’s Mother.”  Freddie, meanwhile, doesn’t think that grades matter because he’s made the basketball team.  In fact, he draws a picture of himself as “Stilt Man” on his test paper.

When Gabe fails Freddy, the basketball coach and Mr. Woodman ask him to reconsider.  The Sweathogs ask him to reconsider.  And Freddie tells Kotter that he’s not going to take a makeup exam.  Kotter challenges Freddie to a basketball game.  If Freddie win, he passes.  If Kotter, who was basketball star in high school, wins, Freddie retakes the test.  Freddie agrees and….

Well, it turns out that a game between a middle-aged, out-of-shape teacher and a high school star athlete goes about as well as you might expect.  We don’t see the game but we do see Mr. Woodman and the basketball coach carrying a delirious Kotter into the teacher’s lounge.  Freddie apparently destroyed Kotter on the court but he’s so impressed by Kotter’s determination that he agrees to retake the test anyway.

Back at the apartment, Kotter tells Julie a joke about why he never wears hats.  Apparently, he felt his head was too big.  Poor guy.

Again, this was not a bad episode.  I was worried that Kotter would somehow beat Freddie at basketball while the audience went wild but, instead, the episode got laughs by being honest.  There was no way Gabe was going to win that game.  Interestingly enough, this episode was as much about Gabe dealing with the fact that he was getting older than it was about getting Freddie to take his grades seriously.  Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs was particularly strong in this episode.  It may have been a comedy but Lawrence Hilton-Jacobs played it like a drama and, as a result, the stakes felt real.

So, the first two episodes of Welcome Back Kotter took me by surprise.  Will the rest of the show be this good?  We’ll find out over the weeks to come!

Scene That I Love: “Want to go for a swim?” from Once Upon A Time In America


Since today is Sergio Leone’s birthday, it only seems appropriate to share one of my favorite scenes from Leone’s 1984 gangster epic, Once Upon A Time In America.

For some context, Noodles (Robert De Niro) has just gotten out of prison and has been reunited with Max (James Woods) and all of the other hoodlums that he grew up with.  While Noodles was away, Max has been building up their gang and becoming a force in the underworld.  One of the first post-prison jobs that Noodles is involved with turns out to be a hit on another gangster.  Max, however, did not let Noodles know ahead of time that it was going to be hit.

In this scene, Noodles attempts to learn why.

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us For Cyborg Cop and Best Seller!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 1993’s Cyborg Cop!  Selected and hosted by BunnyHero, Cyborg Cop stars David Bradley and John Rhys-Davies.  It’s a film about a cyborg who is a cop! The movie starts at 8 pm et and it is available on YouTube.

 

Following #MondayActionMovie, Brad and Sierra will be hosting the #MondayMuggers live tweet.  We will be watching 1987’s Best Seller, a classic thriller starring James Woods as an assassin and Brian Dennehy as the cop-turned-author who Woods wants to tell his story.  Both Dennehy and Woods give excellent performances in this conspiracy-themed thriller.  It is available on both Prime and Tubi and it starts at 10 pm et.

 

It should make for a night of intense viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto twitter, start Cyborg Cop at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!  Then, at 10 pm et, start Best Seller and use the #MondayMuggers hashtag!  The live tweet community is a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.  And reviews of these films will probably end up on this site at some point over the next few weeks. 

The TSL’s Grindhouse: John Carpenter’s Vampires (dir by John Carpenter)


Wow, there certainly are a lot of vampires in New Mexico!

Well, I guess I can understand the logic behind it.  My family used to visit New Mexico frequently.  We even lived there for a few months when I was a kid.  If you’re looking for a place to hide out, New Mexico is a good place to do it.  You can drive for hours without seeing another car or another person.  Add to that, New Mexico is state where people respect your privacy.  No one’s going to show up at your house demanding to know why you only come out at night.

Of course, if I was a vampire, I might avoid New Mexico because of the bright sunlight.  Seriously, if you’re trying to escape being touched by the sun, the New Mexico desert might not be the ideal place to hide out.  I don’t know, though.  I’ve never been a vampire.

In John Carpenter’s 1998 film, Vampires (actually, John Carpenter’s Vampires because everyone know the power that the Carpenter name holds for horror fans), Jan Valek (Thomas Ian Griffith) is the world’s oldest vampire and he’s looking to perform a ceremony that will take care of that whole sunlight issue.  If he can perform the ceremony, he’ll be the most powerful creature in the world.

Fortunately, the Vatican has put together a team of ruthless vampire exterminators.  Led by Jack Crow (James Woods), these guys have no problem tracking down vampires and riddling their undead bodies with bullets that have probably been dipped in holy water.  Unfortunately, with the exception of Jack and his second-in-command, Tony (Daniel Baldwin), the vampires hunters aren’t too smart because Valek gets the drop on them while they’re partying at a hotel with a bunch of prostitutes.  The only survivors are Tony, Jack, and Katrina (Sheryl Lee), a prostitute who was previously bitten by Valek.

After teaming up with an enthusiastic but inexperienced priest named Father Guiteau (Tim Guinee), Jack tries to find a way to stop Valek. Meanwhile, Tony finds himself falling for Katrina despite the fact that Katrina will soon be transforming into a vampire and he and Jack have pledged to destroy every vampire that they come across.  It leads to several chases, several bloody shootouts, and a lot of panoramic shots of the New Mexico desert.

The first time I ever watched Vampires, I thought it had its moments of demented fun and I thought that James Woods gave a wonderfully frantic performance as Jack Crow but overall, I got a little bit bored with the film’s constant violence.  There’s only so many times that you can watch people die in slow motion before you get tired of it.  The second time I watched the movie, I was able to better appreciate the film’s self-awareness.  As directed by John Carpenter, it’s intentionally over-the-top in just about every regard and it’s definitely not meat to be taken seriously.  It’s a mix of a western and a vampire film and Carpenter is basically saying, “If we’re going to do this, let’s go crazy with it.”  The film still has its flaws, of course.  Daniel Baldwin seems lost in the role of Tony and the film is oddly paced,  It ends awkwardly, with the promise of a direct sequel that was never made.  (There were sequels, don’t get me wrong.  But Jon Bon Jovi is no substitute for James Woods at his most nervy.)  But the important thing is that, on a second viewing, those flaws were overshadowed by John Carpenter’s kinetic direction and the performances of James Woods, Sheryl Lee, and Thomas Ian Griffith.  

The first time I watched the film, I thought it was just another movie about modern-day vampires killing people while being hunted by unconventional extrerminators.  However, the second time that I watched it, I found myself considering that Vampires is actually a movie about Catholics kicking ass!  Yay!  The lesson here is to always do a second viewing.  Flaws and all, Vampires was far better than I remembered.