Here’s the 2nd trailer for David Fincher’s bastadization rip-off remake version of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.
I’m just going to make just a few general comments:
1) This trailer is obviously a lot more plot-specific than the 1st trailer. It’s also a lot less interesting. The snow-filled landscapes still look impressive but the 1st trailer seemed to be fueled by an unstoppable force. The 2nd trailer seems to be fueled by test groups.
2) I’ve always been honest about how much I loved Noomi Rapace’s performance in the original film. Rooney Mara has some big shoes to fill. In the scenes selected for this trailer, she looks like a little girl playing dress up.
3) Not surprisingly Daniel Craig’s Mikael seems to be a much more active and straight forward hero than Michael Nyqvist’s interpretation. In fact, this trailer could just as easily be for the next James Bond film.
4) Of course, this would be great if not for the fact that the best thing about both the original novel and the original film was that Lisbeth was nobody’s sidekick.
5) Christopher Plummer. Again.
And finally,
6) The 1st trailer had a true grindhouse feel to it and that feeling is sadly missing from the 2nd. Here’s the 1st trailer. Watch and compare:
This is one of those public domain films that seems to show up in every other Mill Creek Box Set. It’s a guilty pleasure of mine and the trailer is all tacky goodness. Plus, Erika Blanc’s in it. (And the title has allowed me to have a lot of fun at my friend Evelyn’s expense.)
Before he was hired to direct Zombi 2, Lucio Fulci directed this spaghetti western. Not surprisingly, it’s one of the darkest, most cynical westerns ever made.
Nine years before Four of the Apocalypse, Fulci directed another western, this one with Franco Nero. Have I mentioned the things I would let Franco Nero do to me if I could get my hands on a time machine? Mmmmm….Franco Nero.
I’ve got mixed feelings about this one. I have a total girlcrush on Kate Beckinsale and I support any movie where women get to kick as much ass as the boys. At the same time, it’s hard not to look at this and think: “Again?”
Still, one thing’s for sure. It’s got to be better than Dylan Dog: Dead of Night.
Let’s start out with this celebration of the fact that Americans always do it better. Yes, the film was originally titled American Warrior. Apparently, ninjas are more appealing than just plain old warriors.
What could possibly be more American than Peter Fonda getting mad and killing people? This was an early film from future “mainstream” director Jonathan Demme.
Well, there might be one thing more American than Peter Fonda killing people and that would have to be Nascar. I’m not sure if they called Nascar Nascar back in 1967 but the idea appears to be the same.
Okay, here’s the red band trailer for David Fincher’s unneccessary offensiveinsulting upcoming version of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.
If you want, feel free to visit YouTube and read all the comments from fanboys having Finchergasms over it. My position will continue to be that David Fincher is a very talented director, Rooney Mara was rather bland in both Nightmare on Elm Street and The Social Network, Daniel Craig is boring and overrated but then again, so is the character he’s playing, and finally, Noomi Rapace will always be the Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.
That doesn’t mean that Fincher won’t make a good movie. The trailer is effective and the material seems well suited for Fincher’s vision. In fact, it could allow Fincher to get back to his Fight Club and Zodiac roots after going all boring and mainstream with The Curious Case of Benjamin Button and The Social Network.
Still, perhaps we should remake The Lord of The Rings trilogy next. After all, those first three films are just sooooo New Zealand. We need an American version.
So, last night, I was selecting which trailer to feature in the upcoming weekend’s edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation trailers when it was pointed out to me that the Rapture is apparently scheduled for Saturday. Now, I have to admit — this kind of annoys me because I really look forward to my Saturdays. So, if I get raptured, I miss out on my favorite day of the week and if I don’t get raptured …. well, it’s just a lose-lose situation for me.
It also annoys me because it means that, potentially, there won’t be anyone around to read my latest post. Well, I guess there will be a lot of atheists, agnostics, heathens, Unitarians, Canadians, and (if it turns out the Protestants are correct) Catholics around but I imagine they’ll be more upset about not being raptured. And since I’m a Catholic but not a very good one, I’ll be screwed twice and not in a fun, college sorta way either.
Anyway, with all that in mind, I’m going to do an early super-sized collection of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers. In order to keep things manageable, I’m going to divide this weekend’s (potentially final) edition into two posts of 6 trailers each.
Since I imagine everyone might be bummed out because either 1) the Rapture happened or 2) the Rapture did not happen, I’m going to start things out with a trailer for Sergio Corbucci’s 1980 comedy Super Fuzz. Now, to be honest, Super Fuzz doesn’t look that funny but maybe people had a different sense of humor back in 1980. The important thing is that the movie stars Terrence Hill and it’s “just for the fun of it!”
But, apparently, crime wasn’t all fun and games in the 80s. I guess when Super Fuzz couldn’t get the job done, they called in the Exterminator. No, not Dale Gribble! That’s King of the Hill, silly. No, the Exterminator appears to be an urban vigilante of some sort. I imagine will see a lot of his type post-Rapture.
3) College Girls (1968)
This trailer is for College Girls which appears to be some sort of late 60s softcore film. I’m not sure that there’s anything really that special about this trailer as much as it’s just always odd to me see these old school sex films and think to myself, “Oh my God, people in black-and-white movies actually do have sex!” Fair Warning: There’s a lot of nudity in this trailer (actually, it’s pretty much just 4 minutes of nudity) along with some out-dated social attitudes so if that offends you, don’t watch it. In fact, I’m kinda surprised that YouTube hasn’t taken it down yet.
(By the way, I checked on Amazon to see if this was available on DVD and oh my God, do you have any idea how many movies there with the words “College Girls” in the title!? Anyway, as far as I can tell, this movie is not available on DVD. Still, searching through all those countless Girls Gone Wild video releases reminded me why I let out a little cheer of delight when Jerry O’Connell got devoured in Piranha 3-D.)
Assuming that we’re all still on the planet after this weekend, I’m going to have to write a tribute to my fellow redhead Erika Blanc, one of the true icons of the European Grindhouse. Until then, here’s a trailer for one of her best films, The Devil’s Nightmare.
I’ve never seen Slaughterhouse Rock though, just judging from the trailer and the year it was made, I imagine that it’s probably not quite as good a film as The Devil’s Nightmare. Just a feeling I’ve got, mind you. However, this film apparently has a cult following because of the film’s new wave soundtrack. I just like the trailer because apparently, choreographer Toni Basil is playing a ghost who can raise the dead by dancing. I’ve actually tracked down the clip of the dance on YouTube and it’s actually pretty cool. I’ve mastered the moves but I haven’t managed to raise the dead yet. But give me time!
Finally, seeing as how the world might be ending tomorrow, let’s close out part one with a trailer for a film that can serve as a stand-in for every misguided decision ever made in Hollywood — 1978’s Convoy. This film, based on that annoying novelty song that some old guy always wants to sing during Kareoke Night, was directed by drug-addled genius Sam Peckinpah and it’s supposedly one of the most cocaine-fueled productions in the history of the movies. (It was also apparently co-directed by James Coburn.) Technically, it’s more of a drive-in movie than a grindhouse film but it’s definitely exploitation.
(By the way, I’ve also read that some people think that the truck in the opening of the trailer is supposed to literally be driving through mountains of cocaine.)
Well, that’s part one of this special edition of Lisa Marie’s favorite grindhouse and exploitation trailers. Part two will be posted early Saturday morning. Don’t let yourself be whisked off to another state of being without checking it out.
How can I be your dream? Because even though I’m currently all the way in Arlington, celebrating my niece’s 3rd birthday (Happy Birthday, Shannon! — that’s the cool thing about the Internet, this’ll still be here in the future for her to read), I still made the time to put together this weekend’s edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers. And I can be your nightmare because … well, that’s my little secret.
Several posts ago, I featured a trailer for a movie called Death Has Blue Eyes. (I love that title, by the way. I’m going to call my autobiography Lisa Marie Has Mismatched Eyes.) Judging from the trailer, this movie could have been called Evil Will Have Wide Lapels. Speaking of eyes, this is yet another movie from 1980 to feature someone shooting beams from her eyes. Apparently, eye beams were a big deal in the early 80s.
For example, The Dark came out in 1979 and what does it feature? That’s right — laser beams being shot from the eyes. Seriously, was this a metaphor for all the cocaine that I’ve heard people were snorting back then?
Films in the 70s and the early 80s were apparently not just obsessed with aliens shooting lasers from their eyes. They were also obsessed with character actor Keenan Wynn. He was featured in The Dark and, that same year, he was also featured in Parts: The Clonus Horror. As for Clonus Horror, I’m guessing that it must be a grindhouse version of one of last year’s best films, Never Let Me Go.
Speaking of clones, here’s the trailer for The Clones. Now, some people have claimed that this might be the most boring trailer ever but I kinda like it just because I think the constant switching from the overly dry voice over to the more surreal scenes of the film creates a kinda neat effect. Believe it or not, I actually have a battered old VHS copy of this film. And it’s not half bad. It ends with this really neat gunfight at an abandoned amusement park that — for some reason — just happens to be sitting out in the middle of Death Valley. Oh, and John Drew Barrymore is in it, acting like John Drew Barrymore. (I also love the fact that apparently, cloning was such a new concept at this point that the trailer had to include a guide to make sure people understood how to properly pronounce the word.)
Actually, I guess the 70s most have been scary all around because apparently, not even Hal Holbrook was safe. I’ve heard good things about this movie though I’ve never actually seen it. I know Code Red announced a DVD release but is Code Red even in business anymore? It’s difficult to keep track. Anyway, this looks like a good movie to have on hand if I ever have to justify why I don’t camp.
6) Venus In Furs (196?)
Well, the 70s are pretty icky, huh? Maybe it’d be better if we took our cinematic time machine back to the 60s, when this adaptation of the Marquis De Sade’s Venus in Furs was apparently made and released. I don’t know much about this film beyond the fact that it is not to be confused with Jess Franco’s Venus in Furs, which starred James Darren and Klaus Kinksi.
I love Saturday and not just because it’s the weekend! Nor is it just because Saturday is the day that I traditionally go down to either Northpark Mall or the Galleria and spend way too much money on DVDs, book, lingerie, and handbags. I love Saturday because Saturday is the day that I get to bring you another edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers.
It might not be obvious from the trailer but this is actually a really good, surprisingly somber film. Director Gary Sherman later went on to make the infamous Vice Squad.
3) The Touchables (1968)
The writer of this film, Donald Cammell, later went on to co-direct Mick Jagger in 1970’s Performance. As far as I can tell, The Touchables is not available on DVD. (There is an earlier film called The Touchables that’s available from Something Weird Video but it’s a different movie.) If anyone knows that this film is available, please let me know as I’ve just recently read a book on Cammell and right now, his films are something of an obsession of mine.
“Stanley — a snake that learned that only man kills his own kind…” All film trailers use to feature pompous narration but the best exploitation trailers managed to take the standards of pompous narration to such an extent that it became a work of postmodern art. As for Stanley, I actually own this film. It was on one of those 8-movie compilation DVDs that were all the rage a few years ago. The copy I saw looked like it had just been transferred off of a beaten-up VHS tape (and it probably was) but the movie still gave me nightmares because I’ve got a thing about snakes. (By the way, clicking on the above link will lead you not to the copy I watched but to a “special edition” Stanley DVD. To my best knowledge, the special edition looks a lot better than the copy I own.)
“Johnny Firecloud — a hate story!” This appears to be one of those films that just asks, ‘What else can go wrong?” I mean, not only is Johnny Fireclould having to deal with prejudice but the whole thing apparently involves a nuclear war as well.
Admittedly, I probably wouldn’t have given this trailer a second thought if not for the fact that I’ve gotten into running lately. Still, this trailer does feature the priceless “You can kiss my feet” scene, a scene that is memorable for a lot of reasons, the least being the look on James Coburn’s face. And remember, you’ll love Goldengirl “even after you know her secret.”
(Interesting sidenote: On Amazon, Goldengirl is only available in VHS form. You can either spend $126 to get a “never before watched” copy or you can spend $4.90 to get a used copy.)
At the risk of revealing my inner fangirl, there is nothing — NOTHING, I SAY! — that I am more looking forward to than sitting in a dark theater and watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallow, Part 2 on July 15th.
Let’s just hope that, after this movie comes and goes — Hollywood doesn’t decide to remake the Harry Potter series with Daniel Craig as Harry and Rooney Mara playing Hermione under the direction of David Fincher.
In the 60s, there were gang debs and in the 70s, there were cheerleaders. And there were an awful lot of movies about cheerleaders that apparently were a lot more sordid than Bring It On.
They’re not just cheerleaders — they’re swinging cheerleaders! Believe it or not, this was directed by the same Jack Hill who directed Switchblade Sisters and countless Pam Grier films.
Eventually, filmmakers ran out different adjectives to place before the word “Cheerleaders.” And that is how this movie ended up being called The Pom Pom Girls.
Needless to say, this is the edited version of this particular’s film’s trailer. If I ever get a chance to watch Debbie Does Dallas, I’ll have tobecause I live in Dallas. And if Debbie thinks she’s going to do Dallas better than I do Dallas, she might want to jump off that dream train. Just saying…
(By the way, I know that there’s a small group of you out there who probably think I’m just using this post an excuse to kid my sister Erin about her high school cheerleading days. Perish the thought! In fact, to prove my good intentions, the next 6 trailers will be, in absolutely no way, related to cheerleading.)
I’m including this trailer specifically for one of our regular and loyal readers. He knows who he is and here’s hoping he’s having himself a good weekend.
8 ) The Naked Bunyip (1970)
I’ve never seen this film, I just came across it while I was specifically looking up trashy cheerleader-centric trailers on YouTube. It appears to be an Australian mondo film.
Film looks terrible but I love that tagline: “It seemed like a good idea at the time!” I have a feeling that’s what Ray Milland spent all of 1973 telling himself.
This was on the Fox Movie Channel earlier this week and I actually set the DVR for it. Ben Gazzara chews the scenery of Al Capone and then a really young Sylvester Stallone pops up as Frank Nitti. This is one of those 70s mafia films that tries to be The Godfather, just with less running time and a smaller budget. It’s kinda boring, to be honest.
