So, last night, I was selecting which trailer to feature in the upcoming weekend’s edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation trailers when it was pointed out to me that the Rapture is apparently scheduled for Saturday. Now, I have to admit — this kind of annoys me because I really look forward to my Saturdays. So, if I get raptured, I miss out on my favorite day of the week and if I don’t get raptured …. well, it’s just a lose-lose situation for me.
It also annoys me because it means that, potentially, there won’t be anyone around to read my latest post. Well, I guess there will be a lot of atheists, agnostics, heathens, Unitarians, Canadians, and (if it turns out the Protestants are correct) Catholics around but I imagine they’ll be more upset about not being raptured. And since I’m a Catholic but not a very good one, I’ll be screwed twice and not in a fun, college sorta way either.
Anyway, with all that in mind, I’m going to do an early super-sized collection of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers. In order to keep things manageable, I’m going to divide this weekend’s (potentially final) edition into two posts of 6 trailers each.
Here’s part one:
1) Super Fuzz (1980)
Since I imagine everyone might be bummed out because either 1) the Rapture happened or 2) the Rapture did not happen, I’m going to start things out with a trailer for Sergio Corbucci’s 1980 comedy Super Fuzz. Now, to be honest, Super Fuzz doesn’t look that funny but maybe people had a different sense of humor back in 1980. The important thing is that the movie stars Terrence Hill and it’s “just for the fun of it!”
2) The Exterminator (1980)
But, apparently, crime wasn’t all fun and games in the 80s. I guess when Super Fuzz couldn’t get the job done, they called in the Exterminator. No, not Dale Gribble! That’s King of the Hill, silly. No, the Exterminator appears to be an urban vigilante of some sort. I imagine will see a lot of his type post-Rapture.
3) College Girls (1968)
This trailer is for College Girls which appears to be some sort of late 60s softcore film. I’m not sure that there’s anything really that special about this trailer as much as it’s just always odd to me see these old school sex films and think to myself, “Oh my God, people in black-and-white movies actually do have sex!” Fair Warning: There’s a lot of nudity in this trailer (actually, it’s pretty much just 4 minutes of nudity) along with some out-dated social attitudes so if that offends you, don’t watch it. In fact, I’m kinda surprised that YouTube hasn’t taken it down yet.
(By the way, I checked on Amazon to see if this was available on DVD and oh my God, do you have any idea how many movies there with the words “College Girls” in the title!? Anyway, as far as I can tell, this movie is not available on DVD. Still, searching through all those countless Girls Gone Wild video releases reminded me why I let out a little cheer of delight when Jerry O’Connell got devoured in Piranha 3-D.)
4) The Devil’s Nightmare (1971)
Assuming that we’re all still on the planet after this weekend, I’m going to have to write a tribute to my fellow redhead Erika Blanc, one of the true icons of the European Grindhouse. Until then, here’s a trailer for one of her best films, The Devil’s Nightmare.
5) Slaughterhouse Rock (1988)
I’ve never seen Slaughterhouse Rock though, just judging from the trailer and the year it was made, I imagine that it’s probably not quite as good a film as The Devil’s Nightmare. Just a feeling I’ve got, mind you. However, this film apparently has a cult following because of the film’s new wave soundtrack. I just like the trailer because apparently, choreographer Toni Basil is playing a ghost who can raise the dead by dancing. I’ve actually tracked down the clip of the dance on YouTube and it’s actually pretty cool. I’ve mastered the moves but I haven’t managed to raise the dead yet. But give me time!
6) Convoy (1978)
Finally, seeing as how the world might be ending tomorrow, let’s close out part one with a trailer for a film that can serve as a stand-in for every misguided decision ever made in Hollywood — 1978’s Convoy. This film, based on that annoying novelty song that some old guy always wants to sing during Kareoke Night, was directed by drug-addled genius Sam Peckinpah and it’s supposedly one of the most cocaine-fueled productions in the history of the movies. (It was also apparently co-directed by James Coburn.) Technically, it’s more of a drive-in movie than a grindhouse film but it’s definitely exploitation.
(By the way, I’ve also read that some people think that the truck in the opening of the trailer is supposed to literally be driving through mountains of cocaine.)
Well, that’s part one of this special edition of Lisa Marie’s favorite grindhouse and exploitation trailers. Part two will be posted early Saturday morning. Don’t let yourself be whisked off to another state of being without checking it out.