Late Night Retro Television Review: 4.5 “….The Clock Runs Out”

Posted on June 17, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, Joe Hears meets his fate.

Episode 4.5 “….The Clock Runs Out”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on November 2nd, 1988)

Poor Joe Hearns!

Last episode, Joe went from being a skid row windshield cleaner to being a defense coordinator to being a linebacker on the team. This episode …. well, he dies.

Seriously.

It’s not a particularly noble death either. After a rookie player (played by Kevin Sorbo, of all people) is seriously injured in a prank involving a bull, Hearns decides to go back to the farm and challenge the bull himself. The show ends with the bull charging at Hearns and since Harold Sylvester (the actor who played Hearn) is not listed as having appeared in any episode of 1st & Ten beyond this one, I can only assume that the bull won.

Seriously, what was the point of that whole storyline? Bubba, Jethro, and TD all thought that Joe Hearns would be able to redeem himself on the Bulls. Hearns turned out to be suffering from massive PTSD, the result of having crippled an opposing player the last time he played. This episode, Joe has a near breakdown when one of the team’s new executives reprimands Joe for parking in his spot. And then Joe dies. I guess the lesson here is that he would have been better off if Bubba and Jethro had just left him in that parking lot.

Watching this show, I get the feeling that the writers really didn’t have much direction in the writing room. It’s amazing how often a potentially interesting character like Joe Hearn will be introduced and then dropped an episode later. There have been so many storylines that have been started and abandoned in a similar fashion. This very season started with the Bulls players buying the team and then, three episodes later, they decided that they didn’t want to be team owners after all.

The one thing that remains consistent? The bland affability of OJ Simpson. OJ may not have been a particularly good actor but he certainly was personable. That undoubtedly paid off for him later in life.

Unfortunately, Joe Hearns was not personable. And now, he’s dead.

(Actually, so is OJ.)

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 4.4 “Down and Out in Bulls Stadium”

Posted on June 10, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Episode 4.4 “Down and Out In Bulls Stadium”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on October 26th, 1988)

The first game of the year is approaching and the Bulls, now owned by the Dobbs Corporation, have got a lot to deal with.

Mad Dog has to explain to an aspiring cheerleader (Christie Claridge) that he no longer has the power to make her a Bullette, despite the fact that he promised that he would do so when he was trying to get her to sleep with him.

New quarterback Doug Clayton (Scott Geyer) has to prove that he can lead the team, despite having a reputation for being an intellectual. Doug gave up a Rhodes scholarship so that he could play professional football. That doesn’t sound that smart, to be honest. I mean, will Oxford still be willing to give Doug a chance after he’s suffered twenty concussions?

TD Parker (OJ Simpson) must now work for the Dobbs Corporation, despite previously criticizing the corporation for not promoting enough minorities. TD explains to the press that he and the new owners came to an agreement. He also mentions that the corporation agreed to pay him a lot of money. So, I guess TD’s days as a radical labor leader have been slashed short.

Finally, after Bubba and Jethro spot him living in a parking lot and wiping windshields for a living, they convince TD to hire Joe Hearns (Harold Sylvester) as a defensive coach. Hearns was once a linebacker, which I guess is a defensive position. His career came to an end when he crippled a wide receiver. As a defensive coach, Hearns is a wash. At one point, he nearly runs out onto the field to tackle an opposing player. To me, that would indicate that Hearns has some mental issues and poor impulse control. To Coach Denardo, it means that Joe should be playing instead of coaching. Hearns returns to the lineup and promptly starts to have nightmares about the player he crippled.

Here’s the important thing, though. Doug leads the Bulls to victory in their first game and he makes it a point to praise defensive players like Mad Dog and Dr. Death. Tim Yinessa? Who needs him! Team Doug all the way!

This episode …. actually, it wasn’t that bad. I will admit that I laughed when Hearns had a vision of a wheelchair-bound football player rolling straight at him but that’s just because it was such an absurd image. Harold Sylvester actually gave a pretty good performance as the emotionally damaged, guilt-ridden Joe Hearns. I’m interested in seeing what the show is going to do with the Hearns character and Doug is far more interesting quarterback than the somewhat whiny Yinessa.

This season might be okay!

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 4.3 “Caught In The Draft”

Posted on May 27, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, it’s for the draft.

Episode 4.3 “Caught In The Draft”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on October 19th, 1988)

The Bulls attend the draft and screw everything up. It turns out that allowing the players to own the team was a really bad idea. In fact, it goes so badly that TD Parker (OJ Simpson) really deserves to be fired for suggesting it in the first place. But, nobody wants to get on TD’s bad side, for some reason.

How badly does it go?

The Bulls need a linebacker. Sonny Cowers, the phenom out of Louisiana, is available in the first round. Unfortunately, Mad Dog worries that, if he drafts Sonny, the Bulls will then either release or trade him. Seeing as how Mad Dog owns the team, I’m not really sure how he could be traded or released but whatever. Mad Dog picks a player that the team doesn’t need and Sonny is picked by another team.

Meanwhile, Jethro and Bubba insist on drafting an unheralded running back because they’re convinced the man is in their hotel room and threatening to commit suicide if he’s not drafted. It turns out that the man in the hotel room was just an actor and that the Bulls just got conned into drafting some fat guy from Tennessee.

The Bulls do get a new head coach when TD trades a sixth round draft pick for the new coach of Houston’s term, Ernie Denardo. That’s right, Denardo’s back!

The draft is such a disaster that the bank cancels their loan and the players are forced to sell the team to the fast food company that they were trying to avoid being purchased by in the first place.

I actually liked this episode. I enjoyed the chaos of the draft and it was hard not to laugh at the earnest stupidity of the players. Shouldn’t you guys be trying to draft a quarterback? I thought at one point and, for a second, I felt like a sports expert.

Seriously, they need do need to get a quarterback.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 4.2 “The Inmates Buy The Asylum”

Posted on May 20, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The center cannot hold.

Episode 5.2 “The Inmates Buy The Asylum”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on October 12th, 1988)

If there’s one thing that you can depend on when it comes to this show, it’s inconsistency.

Last week, the players decided to buy the team. This was portrayed as being a genius move on their part. Dr. Death dressed up in a suit and said that he was ready to be a businessman as well as a player. TD Parker (OJ Simpson) told the players that it would be a good idea to take a blade to the typical player/owner relationship.

This week, the players buy the team and everything starts to fall apart. Suddenly, the players are all too concerned with their own petty issues to be smart businessmen. Dr. Death is no longer wearing a suit and shows up for a meeting of all the team owners in a denim jacket. (All of the owners except for one walk out on him.) The team decides to fire Coach Grier. Why? They just don’t like him. T.D. delivers the news to an embittered Grier and admits that the players are not good owners. Gee, TD, maybe you shouldn’t have told them to buy the team!

In other words, the players have seized the means of production and screwed everything up. If nothing else, this episode was a good example of why communism will never work.

Meanwhile, agent Max Green was still in Louisiana, trying to sign college linebacker Sonny Clowers (Gary Kasper). Fortunately, a chance meeting with the preacher of Sonny’s church gave Max an inside track. But with the Bulls be able to get it together in time to draft him?

I guess we will find out next week. As for this episode, it felt as if the writers suddenly realized that it was a mistake to have the players buy the team so they set out to course correct at the last minute. Myself, I’m wondering how being both a player and an owner would work. Who sets the salaries? If a player is traded, is he still an owner?

Seriously, this all seems like a bad idea.

Late Night Retro Television Review: 1st & Ten 4.1 “The Bulls Own Up”

Posted on May 13, 2026 by Lisa Marie Bowman

This week, we start season 4.

Episode 4.1 “The Bulls Own Up”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on October 5th, 1988)

It’s time for a new season of 1st & Ten and things have changed!

Yinessa is nowhere to be seen. Instead, this episode features a college quarterback named Sonny Clowers (Gary Kasper) who is being courted by agent Max Green (Mark Lonow). Also not around is Jill Schrader, the team’s owner. She has sold the team to a fast food chain. The new owner of the Bulls is Charles (Monte Markham). In his first meeting with TD Parker (OJ Simpson), Charles explains that he runs a clean-cut, all-American company and he expects the Bulls to be a clean-cut, all-American team.

In other words, it’s time to trade all of the trouble makers and the drug abusers. Charles doesn’t want a team of individuals. He wants a team of …. well, whatever the opposite of an individual is.

TD is not happy to hear about this. Neither is Mad Dog, who is revealed to come from a fabulously wealthy family. Mad Dog’s father wants Mad Dog to do something that requires more skill than football. Hmmm …. maybe Mad Dog and all the other players could form their own company and buy the team themselves?

That doesn’t really sound like a great idea to me. How can you release or trade a player when that player owns the team? However, TD thinks that it’s a good idea. Zagreb thinks it’s a good idea. And Dr. Death shows up for practice in a three-piece suit, which somehow convinces everyone else that it’s a good idea!

Why do I get the feeling that this idea will dropped after six episodes?

This was an okay season opener. The Bulls being sold to a fast food chain certainly makes more sense than Delta Burke acquiring them in a divorce settlement. OJ Simpson recoiling at the thought of the team being expected to avoid scandal? That was almost to on the nose!

Finally, I can’t end this review without saying Donald Gibb, RIP. On a show not known for great acting, Gibb was definitely the exception.