“You are all my children now.”
Hey, does that voice sound familiar? Who would have thought you could dance to Freddy Krueger?
Some people have told me that they find the clown in this video to even scarier than Freddy.
Tag Archives: Lisa Marie Bowman
4 Shots From 4 Horror Films: The 1970s Part Two
This October, I’m going to be doing something a little bit different with my contribution to 4 Shots From 4 Films. I’m going to be taking a little chronological tour of the history of horror cinema, moving from decade to decade.
Today, we continue with the 70s!
4 Shots From 4 Horror Films
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974, dir by Tobe Hooper)
Jaws (1975, dir by Steven Spielberg)
Carrie (1976, dir by Brian DePalma)
The Omen (1976, dir by Richard Donner)
Bonus Horror On The Lens: The Beast of Yucca Flats (dir by Coleman Francis)
Since today would have Tor Johnson’s birthday, it only seems appropriate to share a bonus Horror On The Lens. This is the one film in which Tor Johnson starred, 1961’s The Beast Of Yucca Flats.
The Beast of Yucca Flats is a thoroughly inept film that makes next to no sense and has massive continuity errors. It’s a film that also features Tor Johnson as a Russian scientist who gets mutated by radiation and becomes a monster, but not before taking off almost all of his clothes while walking through the desert. For that matter, it’s also a film about a family that comes together though adversity — namely, being shot at by the police after the family patriarch is somehow mistaken for Tor Johnson. And finally, it’s the story of how a dying monster can find comfort from a rabbit and that’s actually kind of a sweet message.
Here’s the thing — yes, The Beast of Yucca Flats is bad but you still owe it to yourself to watch it because you will literally never see anything else like it. Plus, maybe you’ll be able to figure out what the whole point of the opening scene is.
Because I’ve watched this film a few times and I still have no idea!
Enjoy!
Horror On The Lens: Kingdom of the Spider (dir by John “Bud” Cardos)
Agck! I hate spiders and today’s movie has got a lot of them!
Fortunately, it also has William Shatner and some lovely Southwestern scenery.
Still, if you have a thing about spiders, this film will probably scare the Hell out of you, which makes it perfect for October. Fortunately, William Shatner gives a very William Shatenerish performance and therefore provides some relief from all of the tarantula horror.
Here is 1977’s Kingdom of the Spiders!
October Positivity: Miracle at Manchester (dir by Eddie McClintock)
2022’s Miracle at Manchester tells the story of a high school community that is brought together by one potential tragedy.
Brycen Newman (Kory Getman) is a high school student and an all-around athlete, a star on both the baseball and the football teams. But when he faints during baseball practice and also suffers a sudden nosebleed in the middle of class, his father (played by director Eddie McClintock) rushes Brycen to the hospital. He’s told that there’s nothing wrong with Brycen, beyond the typical teenage growing pain. Take a Tylenol and don’t worry about it, he’s told. That night, Brycen is woken up by a blinding headache. Another trip to the hospital reveals that Brycen has got a tumor in his brain. Brycen is continually given hope, just to have it snatched away. At first, he’s told that the tumor has been removed. But then the tumor comes back. Brycen goes through chemotherapy and even prepares to be sent to Florida so that he can take part in an experimental treatment. No one has much faith that Brycen is going to survive but Brycen’s fellow students rally around him. The football teams shaves their head in honor of Brycen. A priest leads a prayer ceremony in the stands. Journalist Miles Himmel (Nick Avila) follows Brycen’s story and reports all the details, even though he firmly does not believe in miracles. (He even snaps at his young daughter when he hears her talking about a miracle.)
While this is going on, a local mechanic named Ed Hanson (a nice performance from Daniel Roebuck) is fixing cars and, for veterans, charging on a dollar. His wife, who happens to be a nurse at the hospital, tells Ed that he need to get more rest and he needs to come up with a better financial plan than only charging people a dollar for thousands of dollars worth of work. Ed replies that he has no choice. He does it for the veterans and the needy. Good for Ed. We need more people like Ed in the world.
Miracle at Manchester is the type of low-budget, overly earnest filmmaking that typically brings out my cynical side but I have to admit that I actually teared up a bit while watching this film. Some of that is for strictly personal reasons. I lost my mom to cancer in 2008. Last year, I lost my Dad to Parkinson’s. Right now, I’m still in a state where even seeing a hospital room in a film will trigger my tears. But beyond that, it was a heartfelt story and also one that was (perhaps loosely, I don’t know) based on a true story. The film ended with the footage of the actual Brycen. It got to me.
Speaking of my father, after he died, I was organizing his estate and I was surprised to discover that he used to regularly give money to Make-A-Wish. Two representatives of Make-A-Wish appear in this film. Again, I can be cynical when it comes to various charities but Make-A-Wish seems like a good group of people. I’m proud of my Dad for supporting them.
Late Night Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell 1.1 “Dancing To The Max”
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime and Tubi!
Good Morning Miss Bliss failed where it aired on the Disney Channel but Brandon Tartikoff, president of NBC, felt that the show still had a potential future on NBC. Specifically, Tartikoff felt the kids — Mark-Paul Gosselaar, Dustin Diamond, and lark Voorhees — and Dennis Haskins were the ones worth keeping around. As such, Hayley Mills was let go. Max Battimo and Heather Hopper were dropped from the cast. The show was retconned from taking place in Indiana to taking place in California. The show itself was retitled Saved By The Bell….
Episode 1.1 “Dancing To The Max”
(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on August 20th, 1989)
This is it. This is the first episode of Saved By The Bell, the network morning show that would go on to dominate syndication for 20 years. That’s the thing about Saved By The Bell. It’s not necessary to have been anywhere close to being a teenager when this show began. It’s not necessary to have watched the shows when they originally aired. If you grew up in the 90s or the aughts, you knew Saved By The Bell. It was one of those shows that always seemed like it was airing somewhere. Even as recently as two years ago, it was airing on MeTV and there were frequent marathons on E! Today, it’s on Prime and Tubi. That’s not bad for a show that, if we’re to be absolutely honest, really wasn’t that good.
The first episode — which actually premiered in prime time before the show subsequently moved to its Saturday morning time slot — sets up the show. Zach Morris (I know that some people claim that it’s spelled Zack but I’ve always gone with Zach), Screen Powers, Lisa Turtle, and Mr. Belding have all been resecured from the Indiana Hell of Good Morning, Miss Bliss. Now, they all live in California and they all attend Bayside High School. They hang out at the Max, a tacky restaurant owned by a tacky magician named Max (Ed Alonzo).
Joining the ensemble are Jessie Spano (Elizabeth Berkley), Kelly Kapwoski (Tiffani-Amber Thiessen), and AC Slater (Mario Lopez). Both Slater and Zach have a crush on Kelly. Screech likes Lisa. A dance contest is approaching, one that is hosted by Casey Kasem. (All the teenagers on the show go crazy over someone who, realistically, most of them had probably never heard of. Max imitates Casey Kasem saying his name twice.) Screech wants to ask Lisa to be his partner but Lisa’s already been asked by someone else. Kelly can’t choose between Zach and Slater so they agree to have a dance-0ff. Uh-oh, Zach can’t dance! Maybe his childhood friend Jessie will teach him….
Jessie doesn’t have a date because she’s tall. When she tells Kelly and Lisa about being insecure about her height, they joke that she could become a basketball player. This gets a big laugh and I assume this episode aired before the WNBA was a thing. Eventually, Zach tells Kelly to enter the contest with Slater because he’s going with his best friend, Jessie. Meanwhile, Lisa sprains her ankle, get dumped by her partner, and ends up entering the contest with Screech.
It’s interesting to watch the character dynamics in this first episode. Jessie is not the straw feminist she would later become. Slater is a jock but still sensitive enough to comfort Screech. Kelly is actually portrayed as being somewhat shallow. Watching this episode, one gets the feeling that Zach and Jessie were originally meant to be the show’s main couple until someone decided that Zach and Kelly had better chemistry and that Jessie’s feminism and Slater’s chauvinism would make for an interesting combination. Lisa doesn’t like Screech but she doesn’t quite hate him as much she would in later episodes. Even more importantly, Zach is nowhere near as cocky as he would be in later episodes. He’s actually insecure about something.
As for the dance contest, Lisa and Screen dance “The Sprain” and they win, largely due to Slater and Zach bullying everyone into voting for them. “C’mon,” Casey Kasem announces, “let’s all do …. THE SPRAIN!” Everyone starts hopping on one foot and, at home, I cringe like you wouldn’t believe.
God, this was a stupid episode. And yet …. it was very likable. The young cast had a lot of talent. In this episode, even Dustin Diamond’s Screech is tolerable. I cringed at the extremely cheesy dance contest but I also smiled. I guess that’s the power of nostalgia. Sometimes, even the really bad things make you feel good when you rewatch them.
Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 10/12/25 — 10/18/25
Abbott Elementary (Wednesday Night, ABC)
The Abbott teachers go to a baseball game! As our readers may have noticed, my sister loves baseball so I made sure to have her watch this episode with me. She enjoyed it, which made me happy. Myself, I found myself wondering why so many shows — like Abbott with Philadelphia or Dick Wolf’s Chicago shows — take place in cities that most American hate. Like, if I was ever told that I had to pick between Philadelphia or prison, I’d probably pick prison because at least there wouldn’t be as many people yelling. Yet, Abbott is often a rather charming show and I usually love It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia. It’s just weird how these things work.
Hell’s Kitchen (Thursday Night, Fox)
Ugh, this episode made me physically ill. I don’t think I could ever be a professional chef, not if it means having to clean every inch of a fishing boat. (I cleaned my kitchen before watching this episode and my back was killing me by the time I was finished.) As for this episode and this season, it doesn’t seem like a single chef should be trusted to cook food for anyone. Chef Ramsay is doing a lot of yelling and I agree with him.
Law and Order (Thursday Night, NBC)
This week, yet another millionaire was murdered in New York City and there was yet another crazy defense that, for whatever reason, Maroun seemed to have sympathy for. As much as I usually like the “Law” half of these shows, the “Order” part often verges on self-parody. Between Nolan Price’s wimpy summations and Maroun’s eagerness to protect the criminals, I’m surprised they ever get a conviction.
Night Flight (NightFlight Plus)
On Saturday morning, I watched a video profile of KISS, a band that I really didn’t know much about. I enjoyed the juxtaposition between the fearsome makeup and their not-at-all fearsome music.
Snub TV (NightFlight Plus)
On Friday night. Jeff and I watched an episode of this 80s music show with our friends, Patrick and Dani. It was good music. You could dance to it.
Special Forces: World’s Toughest Test (Thursday Night, Fox)
This show is just not that interesting without Jussie Smollett crying about how nobody will accept that “I just want to move on” from filing a false police report. If it was really the world’s toughest test, I don’t think a bunch of out-of-shape reality show participants would be doing as well as they are.
Twilight Zone (Prime)
This week, I watched a few classic episodes — To Serve Man, The Monsters Are Due On Maple Street, Twenty-Two (“Room for one more, honey!”), Will The Real Martian Please Stand Up, Nick of Time, and Nightmare at 20,000 Feet. If the Twilight Zone is not a part of your October viewing, you’re doing Halloween wrong!
The Vanishing Ray (NightFlight Plus)
I checked in with this 1930s serial on Friday night. The bad guys were still after the vanishing ray and the good guys were still trying to protect it. As always, this chapter ended with a cliffhanger and an invitation to return to theater next week for the next installment.
Horror on TV: Halloween Is Grinch Night (dir by Gerard Baldwin)
So, we all know that the Grinch once tried to steal to Christmas and then his heart grew a few sizes but did you know that apparently, the Grinch also tried to steal Halloween?
Until about 9 years ago, I did not. I was going through YouTube, searching for horror films that I could share here on the Shattered Lens, and guess what I came across?
A TV special from 1977 entitled Halloween is Grinch Night!
Unlike How The Grinch Stole Christmas, Halloween is Grinch Night apparently never became a holiday classic. Perhaps that’s because Halloween is Grinch Night is not exactly the most heart-warming of holiday specials. Whereas How The Grinch Stole Christmas tells us about how the Grinch learned the true meaning of Christmas, Halloween is Grinch Night gives us a Grinch who has no redeeming features. There is no hope for this Grinch. This Grinch will steal your soul and probably drink your blood. This Grinch is pure Grinchy evil.
This is the Grinch of our nightmares.
Check out Halloween is Grinch Night below and hope the Grinch doesn’t capture you this Halloween….
Retro Television Review: Baywatch 1.2 “Heat Wave”
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch, which ran on NBC and then in syndication from 1989 to 2001. The entire show can be purchased on Tubi.
Save me!
Episode 1.2 “Heat Wave”
(Dir by Gus Trikonis, originally aired on September 29th, 1989)
Not much of an episode this week, I’m afraid.
California is dealing with a heat wave and no one has air conditioning (really?) so everyone in Los Angeles is heading down to the beach so that they can relax in the hot sand. Eddie and Trevor keep giving each other the side eye because Eddie is a Baywatch lifeguard and Trevor is a country club life guard. Eddie tries to hit on a woman who has spent the entire day relaxing near his tower but it turns out that she’s visiting from Australia and only has eyes for Trevor. “Maybe next time,” she tells Eddie.
Craig is told by his boss that he has to choose between being a lawyer at a big firm or a lifeguard. Craig’s wife, Gina, suggests that Craig quit the law firm and become a beachfront lawyer. She says that he can still be a lifeguard and he can just use their kitchen table as his desk. I don’t know if I would be as understanding as Gina. Craig was making a lot of money as a big corporate lawyer, even if he apparently couldn’t afford to get an air conditioner.
(What the Heck, California? How are you surviving with air conditioning!?)
Meanwhile, two stupid kids get trapped in a storm drain. Mitch sends the junior lifeguards out to look for them. Hobie asks, “What can a bunch of junior lifeguards do?” Mitch replies that this is an opportunity for the junior lifeguards to go to all the places that they’re usually not allowed to go. So, basically, Mitch’s plan to find the missing kids is to put a bunch of other kids at risk. I guess that’s why he’s the lieutenant.
Luckily, the two dumb kids are rescued. One of the kids is the son of Steve Humboldt (Jeffrey Byron), a former Baywatch lifeguard. It turns out that Steve lost custody of his kid in a court case and he basically abducted him. But, after the kid nearly dies, Steve is like, “We’re going to call your mom and go home!” and that apparently makes everything okay under the “He Changed His Mind Afterwards” clause.
This was all pretty dumb. Stay out of the storm drain, kids! It’s not that difficult.
Scenes That I Love: “Help me!” from The Fly
The Fly (1958, D: Kurt Neumann)
One of the great things about the original, 1958 version of The Fly is that, even though it starred Vincent Price, Price didn’t play the Fly. Instead, for once, Price was allowed to be the voice of reason, the guy who said, “Maybe don’t mess around with the laws of time and space.”
Today’s scene that I love is from the ending of the original Fly. Supposedly, Price had a hard time filming this scene because whenever he heard the recording of David Hedison crying out, “Help me!,” he would start laughing. Still, if you know what spiders actually do to the flies that they capture, you can’t help but sympathize with our misdirected scientist in the web. Destroying him with a rock was probably the most merciful thing that anyone could do.
Through the Shattered Lens 