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Brad heads down the BLACKTOP (2000) with Mad Trucker Meat Loaf!

Posted on by Bradley Crain

BLACKTOP opens on stand-up comic David (Lochlyn Munro) in the middle of his act at an out of the way truckers bar. His girlfriend Sylvia (Kristin Davis) is at the show, and she doesn’t look very happy. After the show, we find out that David & Sylvia’s relationship is not in a good place at all. She wants to settle down and get married, and he wants to keep performing his shows even though his career is going nowhere. When he tells her he’s agreed to perform three more nights the next weekend at that same place, she blows a gasket and wants to get out of there. Conveniently, a nice trucker named Jack (Meat Loaf), who she had only just met a little earlier, is there handy, and she asks him for a ride out of town in his truck, Goliath. He happily agrees, almost too happily, because it turns out he just might be a serial killer. Sensing something’s off and wanting to get his girlfriend back, David takes off after them, hoping to find them before she becomes the next victim.

That’s the basis for this “mad trucker” thriller that premiered on HBO back in October of 2000.  If the story sounds ludicrous to you, just know that it is. It takes a completely stupid decision to kick off the events of the story. Seriously Sylvia, David may be a bit of a loser, but do you have to abandon him and ride off into the night with a trucker you don’t know, who looks like Meat Loaf, just to make a point?!! Don’t you think you may be overreacting?!! Some might say that I’m making too big of a deal about this, that it’s just a plot device to set the story of “terror in a big rig” in motion. You are correct in some ways, but her moronic decision stuck with me through the rest of the movie. Later, when she was supposed to be tough, smart and resourceful, I kept thinking about her dumb decision that put her in this predicament, and how many people had already been killed or seriously maimed because of it.

The story also includes these silly little details like Jack leaving clues for David along the way so that he can have a chance to find them. Somehow Jack can perfectly predict David’s exact route and speed so he can place all these notes at the perfect places on the road, with some of them pretty complicated. And he does this without Sylvia even noticing. Sylvia isn’t exactly the most observant person around. Nothing proves this any more than a scene where Jack has Sylvia sit close to him so he can show her how to drive the big rig. While he’s giving her tips, David is trying to drive up and save her. The mad trucker does all this swerving and slamming on breaks and sliding and plays it all off like he’s just showing her some easy and safe driving moves. Sylvia never realizes David is anywhere near them, and since Jack hasn’t gone full psycho yet, she doesn’t seem to care. Maybe I’m just not that big of a fan of Kristin Davis, either. I never really liked her on SEX AND THE CITY, and I don’t like her that much in this either, even though I did kind of like the scenes where she took off her shirt and wandered around in her bra.

Not to sound like this is pick on Kristin Davis day, because I didn’t care for Lochlyn Munro as David either. He was supposed to be this stand-up comic, but he wasn’t funny at all. I mean some people were laughing because the script said so, but he’s lucky tomatoes weren’t being thrown at him. I found everything bland and boring about him, even though he drove a Red 1959 Edsel. That was actually kind of funny, as he kept taking on the big rig with it. I don’t think I’ve ever seen an Edsel / Peterbilt duel in a movie before, but it happens here several times.      

By far the best part of BLACKTOP for me was watching Meat Loaf as Trucker Jack. Loaf had played a villainous trucker in BLACK DOG with Patrick Swayze a couple of years earlier, so the filmmakers must have reasoned that the public wanted more. I’ll admit that his character in this does seem awfully nice at first, and the people around seem to think he’s a pretty good guy too. But he also has this look in his eyes, and when he stops turning on the charm, he’s ready to kill. He’s a kind and empathetic ear to Kristin’s character one moment, and then he’s cutting off someone’s ear with his big knife the next. He’s fixing a nice meal for Kristin one moment, and then he’s shooting at David right in front of her with his high-powered rifle the next. Once she sees that side of him, she starts trying to fight back, and that’s when he gets to go over the top. When he gets to be crazy Trucker Jack, the kind of guy who hangs sides of beef along with murdered victims in the freezer in his truck; those were my favorite parts of the movie.

I know my review sounds very critical in places, and I don’t want to come off too hard on the film. If you’re looking for some solid big rig stunt driving work, and a very simple story featuring a psychopathic truck driver, you could have some fun with this one. Meat Loaf has some fun in his role, so if you’re a fan you should enjoy his work. Just keep your expectations low and don’t ever think that any of the characters are about to make some smart decisions. That seems to be the recipe for enjoying this trip down the BLACKTOP!

Horror On The Lens: The Naked Witch (dir by Larry Buchanan)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

 

Today’s Horror on the Lens come to us for director Larry Buchanan.

Larry Buchanan was not only born in Texas but he made most of his films here too.  In 1964’s The Naked Witch, a college student is doing a research project on the German-speaking villages in Central Texas.  It’s while visiting one such village that this idiot accidentally brings an ancient witch back to life.  In many ways, this is a typical Buchanan film.  The budget is low and the plot is sometimes incoherent.  But the film is also fairly atmospheric.  In my case, it helps that I’ve actually spent time in Central Texas and I know how creepy things can sometimes get out there.

Enjoy The Naked Witch!

The Last Person You Hooked Up With Dies, Short Film Review by Case Wright

Posted on by casewright

The youtuber didn’t have a title card; so, I made a scary ghost. I hope that it didn’t scare you too much! This is a parody of “It Follows”, the horror movie based on an STD that follows the next person and kills them. I always liked “It Follows” because if you were a child of the 90s, AIDS always the big warning that if you had sex, you would die. I would always ask; “why can’t I just use a condom?” and the response was always the same- “You’d risk your life for sex?” and me being me, I would respond with – “I thought that I already established that?” and they would pearl clutch.

In this short, the protagonist is a virgin who no one wants; so, he befriends the “It Follows” puritanical evil spirit and does ride-alongs with it as it explodes its victims. I thought it was fairly funny. There were some actual stars in the films and it appeared to have an actual budget, which gave me some nepobaby vibes. The films were ok, but I couldn’t understand how the budget would be this big, but then I saw that the channel has 1 million subscribers and 1 million views even for this short; so, I guess people have low standards.

I mean, it’s not horrible- just aggressively mediocre. If you’re a wonder bread as a burger bun kind of guy, this is for you.

Join #MondayMania For Cheer For Your Life!

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Hi, everyone!  Tonight, on twitter, I will be hosting one of my favorite films for #MondayMania!  Join us for 2021’s Cheer For Your Life!

You can find the movie on Prime and then you can join us on twitter at 9 pm central time!  (That’s 10 pm for you folks on the East Coast.)  See you then!

4 Shots From 4 Horror Films: October 12th

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

4 Shots From 4 Horror Films

Diliverance (1972,dir by John Boorman, DP: Vilmos Zsigmond)

The Hills Have Eyes (1977, dir by Wes Craven, DP: Eric Saarinen)

Friday the 13th (1980, dir by Sean S. Cunningham, DP: Barry Abrams)

Without Warning (1980, dir by Greydon Clark, DP: Dean Cundey)

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us for The Stickup!

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasionally Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 2002’s The Stickup!

If you want to join this watch party, just hop onto Mastodon, pull up The Stickup on YouTube, start the movie at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!

Enjoy!

October Positivity: Zack (dir by William Mings)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

In this odd 65-minute film from 1983, Michael David Simms stars John “Zack” Zachary.

Zack is a private investigator, though he’s not the hard-drinking, hard-smoking type that you typically expect to see in the movies or on television.  Instead, he’s rather mild-mannered and polite.  He goes to church every Sunday.  Throughout the film, people from his church pop up and try to convince him to start coming on Saturday at well.  Zack has to work though.  He’s got an important case.

(The only thing that really makes Zack look like a typical television detective is that he has a really nice car.  However, that car spends most of this movie “in the shop.”  As a result, Zack has to drive a broken-down pink car.)

You would think that the case would have some sort of religious angle, given that this is a faith-based film.  That’s certainly what I was expecting and I was kind of looking forward to it.  I thought it would be entertaining to watch Zack uncover a cult of atheists and maybe discover that the fire was actually the first sign of the apocalypse.  However, it just turns out to be an ordinary case.  He’s been hired to investigate whether or not a recent fire in Malibu was an accident or a case of arson.  Someone may have committed insurance fraud and Zack is going to help the insurance company by finding out if they did.  (The fact that the hero works for an insurance company is a big clue that this movie was made a long time ago.)

Early on, Zack is approached by a young man named Jeremy Logan (Matthew Shaker), who says that he wants to be a private detective and that he he would appreciate the chance to work with Zack.  Zack agrees, largely because Jeremy and he go to the same church.  Jeremy helps out with the investigation and he also spends a lot of time talking about all of the various church projects that he’s involved with.  About halfway through the film, they meet a woman (Stephani Hardy) who needs help and they take on her case without payment because it’s the right thing to do.  Luckily, the woman has a clue that helps Jeremy and Zack solve the case of the fire.  The solution to the case doesn’t make much sense but it feels kind of inevitable due to the fact that there aren’t that many characters in the film and, therefore, there weren’t that many possible suspects.

This is an example of an attempt to meld faith-based filmmaking with an established genre.  It’s not just a religious film.  It’s a TV-style mystery!  The mystery really isn’t that interesting, though and the solution is a bit unsatisfying,  That said, Michael David Simms gives a surprisingly good performance as Zack.  I personally have a weakness for low budget films from the 70s and 80s because they were usually shot on location and, as a result, they provide a chance to see what the world used to look like.  If nothing else, Zack works as a time capsule.

Brad reviews BELL, BOOK AND CANDLE (1958), starring James Stewart & Kim Novak!

Posted on by Bradley Crain

I love Jimmy Stewart. He’s one of my favorite actors. If Charles Bronson had never existed, there’s a chance he could be my all-time favorite. I watch IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE (and cry) every holiday season, and I believe his series of westerns with Anthony Mann in the 1950s are some of the best ever made. And then there’s his work with Alfred Hitchcock. REAR WINDOW and VERTIGO are movies I discovered as a young and impressionable movie lover. They helped cement Stewart, and Hitchcock, as legends in my mind. In 1958, the same year that he made VERTIGO, Stewart starred in BELL, BOOK AND CANDLE with his VERTIGO co-star Kim Novak. I’ve owned the movie on DVD for years, but I’ve never sat down and watched it before. That changed today!

In this supernatural, romantic comedy, Stewart stars as Shep Henderson, an engaged publisher in New York City who finds himself falling for his beautiful neighbor, Gillian Holroyd (Kim Novak). The problem is that Gillian just happens to be a witch, and she has a bad past with Shep’s fiancé, Merle (Janice Rule). What starts as a ruse to get back at an old rival eventually turns into true love and Gillian doesn’t know how to handle these new feelings. Is she willing to confess what she’s done and give up her powers for a chance at love? I guess you’ll just have to watch and see! 

Stewart makes almost anything enjoyable just by being himself. That amazing voice, combined with his natural humor and charm, gives me something I can latch ahold of, and I always pull for his characters. Kim Novak is just so beautiful, and downright sexy, as Gillian. This character has spent her life operating by one set of rules and all of a sudden, she’s trying to figure out how to deal with feelings she hasn’t dealt with before. Her ability to cast spells and work magic takes on a different meaning when the hearts of people she loves are at stake, and Gillian soon has a crisis of conscience. Stewart and Novak have incredible chemistry, which goes a long way in helping this complicated romance work.

And then there’s the movie’s setting. I came in October for a romantic story involving witches and warlocks, but I ended up with characters falling in love in New York City at Christmastime. I could see this as a movie I watch every year over the holidays moving forward, especially since Stewart is the star. I know my mom will love it!! 

The film also features an incredible supporting cast that includes Jack Lemmon, Ernie Kovacs, Hermione Gingold, Howard McNear and Elsa Lanchester, who’s especially effective as Gillian’s Aunt Queenie. If you leave the movie feeling like you want to go back and watch the old show BEWITCHED, starring Elizabeth Montgomery, I’ll just let you know that makes perfect sense. This movie was actually an acknowledged inspiration for that classic series.

BELL, BOOK AND CANDLE may feature a witch as a main character, but this story doesn’t feature any scares. It’s a fun romance with a charming premise and a great cast. Even a witch has a chance for love, and when that chance is with someone played by Jimmy Stewart, that’s about as magical as it gets!