Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 2.21 “Yesterday’s Love/Fountain of Youth”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1986.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

Smiles, everyone, smiles!  It’s time to take a trip to Fantasy Island!

Episode 2.21 “Yesterday’s Love/Fountain of Youth”

(Dir by George McCowan, originally aired on March 17th, 1979)

Tattoo has the hiccups so Mr. Roarke pops a brown paper bag beside his head and scares the Hell out of him. Tattoo loses his hiccups and Roarke get the joy of tormenting his assistant.

As for the fantasies, they both involve youth and aging.

Charles (Craig Stevens) and Peggy Atwood (Eleanor Parker) met in 1944, when he was in the Navy and she was a member of the USO.  Now, over thirty-years later, Charles wants to open a bait shop and Peggy wants to get a divorce.  Their children pay for Charles and Peggy to take a trip to Fantasy Island, where Mr. Roarke has recreated the period in which they first met.  He’s also invited all of their old friends to come celebrate Peggy and Charles’s anniversary.  Unfortunately, one of those friends is the totally arrogant Brick Howard (Guy Madison), to whom Peggy was engaged before meeting Charles.  It quickly becomes apparent that Brick wants a second chance and that, unlike Charles, Brick has bigger plans than spending his retirement selling fishing bait.

Will Peggy leave her husband for Brick Howard?  Or will she decide that running a bait shop sounds like a great way to spend her twilight years?  You’ll have to watch the show to find out …. or you can read the next paragraph.

Of course, Peggy stays with Charles!  It wouldn’t be Fantasy Island if the ending wasn’t a happy one.  Add to that, when has anyone named Brick Howard not turned out to be a cad?  As you can guess, this fantasy was a bit predictable but the cast of veteran actors were all likable and they gave it their all.  This fantasy was simple but pleasant.

As for the other fantasy, world-famous explorer Jeff Bailey (Dennis Cole) needs money so Mr. Roarke arranges for him to be hired by aging millionaire J.J. Pettigrew (Lew Ayres).  J.J. has heard rumors that the fabled Fountain of Youth can be found on an island near Fantasy Island.  He offers to pay Bailey a million dollars if he can find it.  Of course, Bailey does find the Fountain but he also discovers that the Fountain is guarded by a fierce tribe of headhunters.  The headhunters have no intention of allowing anyone else to have any of the water’s fountain.  The headhunters may be intimidating but they also believe that a polaroid camera can steal their soul.  Bailey threatens to take all of their pictures at one point and tells them that J.J. possesses “white man magic.”  Seen today, it’s a bit awkward to watch.  To be honest, I imagine it was a bit awkward in 1979 as well.

Using his canteen, Bailey steals some of the water from the fountain but, while he and his girlfriend (Mary Louise Weller) are fleeing the natives, he loses the canteen.  J.J. has a heart attack and appears to be dead but, at the end of the episode, Roarke announces that J.J. is expected to survive and he’s written Bailey a check for a million dollars.  Bailey found the fountain and that was their agreement.  So, I guess that all worked out.

Overall, this episode was uneven.  The anniversary story was sweet but predictable.  The headhunter story was sometimes cingey but still enjoyably campy.  This was pretty much a standard episode of Fantasy Island.  Still, I can’t help but wonder why J.J. didn’t just buy an eternal youth fantasy instead of hiring Bailey to search for the fountain.  I guess that question is destined to be forever unanswered.

Next week’s episode is all about comedians and prisoners!

 

A Movie A Day #335: Ruby and Oswald (1978, directed by Mel Stuart)


The year is 1963.  The month is November.  The city is Dallas.  The President of the United States, John F. Kennedy, is coming to visit and two very different men have very different reactions.  An eccentric and lonely strip club owner, Jack Ruby (Michael Lerner), worries about an anti-Kennedy ad that has just appeared in the Dallas Morning News.  Another loner, a strange man named Lee Harvey Oswald (Frederic Forrest), is busy making plans of his own.  When Kennedy is assassinated, history brings Ruby and Oswald together in a way that a shattered nation will never forget.

This is a curious one.  It was made for television and, according to Wikipedia, its original running time was 180 minutes.  The version that I saw, on VHS, was barely 90 minutes long so obviously, the version I saw was heavily edited.  (In the 70s, it was common for made-for-TV movies to be reedited for both syndication and overseas theatrical release.)  Maybe that explains why Ruby and Oswald felt do disjointed.  In the version I saw, most of the emphasis was put on Jack Ruby running around Dallas and getting on people’s nerves.  Very little time was devoted to Oswald and the film was almost entirely stolen by Lerner. Michael Lerner is a familiar character actor.  You may not know his name but you will definitely recognize his face.  Lerner was convincing and sometimes even sympathetic as the weaselly Ruby.  Ruby and Oswald supported the Warren Commission’s findings, that Oswald killed Kennedy and Ruby shot Oswald out of a sense of loyalty to Jackie Kennedy.  Michael Lerner’s performance was so good that he almost made that theory plausible.

One final note, for fans of WKRP in Cincinnati: Gordon Jump and Richard Sanders, best known as Arthur Carlson and Les Nessman, were both in Ruby and Oswald, though they did not share any scenes together.

Cleaning Out The DVR Yet Again #24: Duel (dir by Steven Spielberg)


(Lisa recently discovered that she only has about 8 hours of space left on her DVR!  It turns out that she’s been recording movies from July and she just hasn’t gotten around to watching and reviewing them yet.  So, once again, Lisa is cleaning out her DVR!  She is going to try to watch and review 52 movies by the end of Tuesday, December 6th!  Will she make it?  Keep checking the site to find out!)

duel

On November 5th, I recorded the 1971 film Duel off of MeTV!

Duel tells the story of David Mann (played by Dennis Weaver).  The name is probably not a coincidence.  David is an “everyman,” if your idea of an everyman is a workaholic who is incapable of expressing his emotions.  David is driving through the California desert.  When he calls his wife (apparently, he left home in the morning without ever bothering to wake her), he tells her that he’s on a strict schedule and that he might lose an important sale if he’s delayed in any way.  You get the feeling, however, that David’s trip is less about business and more about a desire to get away from his life.  His conversation with his wife is strained and, when we watch him interact with a gas station attendant, we’re struck by how awkward David is.

Indeed, the only time that David seems to be really comfortable and relaxed is when he’s safely inside of his car.  When we first see him, he’s listening to a radio talk show and occasionally commenting on what he’s hearing.  David Mann has a better rapport with an unseen talk show host than he does with his own family.

Later, in the film, David is flagged down by a school bus that has stalled on the side of the road.  The bus driver asks David to give him a push.  For his part, David reacts with visible panic at the sight of several hyperactive children rushing towards his car. When they hop on his hood, David starts to frantically order them off.  It makes sense really.  The car is what he loves.

Of course, it’s not just bratty children that David has to deal with.  There’s also a gigantic truck traveling up and down the highway.  When David gets stuck behind the truck, he honks his horn.  He yells at the unseen driver.  He passes the truck at one point, just to have the truck promptly pass him so that it can continue to block him.  When the driver finally does motion for David to pass him, David changes lanes just to discover another car coming straight at him.

The truck’s driver, it turns out, wants to kill David.  Why does he want to kill David?  We’re never quite sure.  For that matter, we’re never quite sure what the truck is transporting, beyond the fact that it’s apparently flammable.  But the brilliance of Duel is that it doesn’t matter why the truck’s driver is trying to kill David. All that matters is that he’s determined to do so.

And David — the man who can’t even figure out how to have a conversation with his wife — must now try to figure out how to defeat a seemingly unstoppable predator…

Today, Duel is probably best known for being Steven Spielberg’s first film.  (It was a made-for-television production that got a theatrical release in Europe.)  Watching Duel (and Jaws, for that matter) it’s easy to imagine an alternative universe where, instead of becoming America’s best known creator of mainstream entertainment, Spielberg instead became one of America’s best horror director.  Duel is a suspense-filled thrill ride, one that’s scary because it remains rooted in reality.  Seriously, who hasn’t gotten nervous when they’ve found themselves sharing the road with a gigantic truck?

(If anything, I’d argue that Duel is scarier than Jaws.  I mean, I live in Dallas so it’s not like I have to worry about getting attacked by a shark.  On the other hand, I drive my car nearly every day.)

Dennis Weaver plays the archetype of what would become the typical Steven Spielberg protagonist and he does an excellent job in the role.  Weaver is on screen throughout the entire movie.  We see the entire story unfold through his eyes and Weaver gives a harrowing performance as a man who is slowly but steadily pushed to the verge of a breakdown by an enemy that he cannot even begin to comprehend.

If you haven’t seen Duel, you need to.

Back to School Part II #4: Summer of ’42 (dir by Robert Mulligan)


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Originally, I was going to finish up the first day of my back to school reviews by talking about A Clockwork Orange.  I figured that, since the second film I reviewed was Andy Warhol’s Vinyl, it would just make sense that the fourth film would A Clockwork Orange.

But, I don’t know.  As I sat down and started to work on my fourth review, I realized that I’m not quite ready to write about A Clockwork Orange.  Instead, I’d rather hold off on that until tomorrow.  So, instead, I’m going to talk about Summer of ’42, another coming-of-age film that came out the same year.

That’s right — A Clockwork Orange and Summer of ’42 both came out in 1971 but — in content and sensibility — they might as well exist in different universes.  In fact, the only thing that they have in common is that they both tend to show up on TCM fairly frequently and that they’ve both influenced countless other films.

Speaking of TCM, that’s where I first saw Summer of ’42.  I have to admit that I’m writing this review from memory and that may not be the best way to review a film.  I saw Summer of ’42 about four months ago and, at the time, I thought it was a well-done but predictable little movie.  I even took notes for a future review but I didn’t get around to writing that review because … well, at the time, it just seemed like there wasn’t a lot to say about it.  Summer of ’42 is a sweet film but almost everything about it is right on the surface.  What you see is what you get.  I’m not surprised to discover that it was the 6th highest grossing film of 1971.  In a year that saw not only A Clockwork Orange but The Last Picture Show, The French Connection, Brother John, Billy Jack, Carnal Knowledge, Dirty Harry, Harold and Maude, Let’s Scare Jessica To Death, Klute, Straw Dogs, Pretty Maids All In A Row, and The Zodiac Killer, audiences were probably relieved to see a film that was neither violent, morally ambiguous, nor apocalyptic.

Instead, Summer of ’42 is a coming-of-age story that was specifically crafted to appeal to a world-weary audience’s nostalgia for the simple and carefree days of World War II.  This is one of those films where an older narrator continually reassures us that we’re seeing the most defining moment of his youth and all of the pretty images are in soft focus.  Hermie (Gary Grimes), Oscy (Jerry Houser), and Benjie (Oliver Conant) are three fifteen year-olds, all of whom are spending their summer on Nantucket Island.  Benjie is obsessed with sex but he’s nerdy.  Oscy is obsessed with sex but he’s a jerk.  Hermie is obsessed with sex but he’s the narrator so we already know that he’s too sensitive to lose his virginity to any girl his own age.

Luckily, there’s a woman in her 20s who is living in a nearby beach house.  Dorothy (Jennifer O’Neill) is beautiful but she’s married.  However, her husband’s a soldier and it is 1942 so, pretty soon, he’s out of the picture.  Hermie develops a mad crush on her and then, luckily for him, her husband dies and she spends a night teaching him the ways of love.  The next morning, she vanishes but leaves Hermie a note, telling him that she will never forget him and that it’s up to him to decide what their night together meant.

(Hermie never gets around to telling us what their night together meant so I guess it’s up to us to decide.  Personally, I just hope Hermie was careful who he told because, nowadays, a 23 year-old can get in a lot of legal trouble if she’s caught having sex with a 15 year-old.  Maybe things were different in 1942…)

As I said before, my initial response was that Summer of ’42 was sweet but predictable.  And that’s the way I still feel about it.  It was well-acted, well-filmed, and Jennifer O’Neill was amazingly beautiful but there was still something about Summer of ’42 that kind of bothered me.  We never really got to know who Dorothy was.  Her entire character was defined by her one night with Hermie.  Yes, I do understand that was kind of the point because the story was being told exclusively from Hermie’s point of view.  But it still bothered me.  Beyond being beautiful, tragic, and ultimately available, who was Dorothy?

But really, it wasn’t just something about the Summer of ’42 that was bothering me.  Instead, it was something about the coming-of-age genre in general.  I have lost track of how many nostalgic films and TV shows that I have seen that feature a narrator talking about the summer that he “became a man.”  It’s amazing how many awkward teenage boys apparently lost their virginity to a beautiful older woman who promptly vanished afterwards.  If, as has been recently suggested, I spent next summer in a rented beach house, am I going to be obligated to be the first lover of every 15 year-old, aspiring writer who happens to come wandering down the beach?  That could be time consuming, depending on how popular the beach is.

I guess what I’m saying is that perhaps somebody needs to remake Summer of ’42 and tell it from Dorothy’s point of view.

Just a thought.