Prey of the Jaguar (1996, directed by David DeCoteau)

Derek Leigh (Maxwell Caulfield) is a former Special Ops agent whose son and wife are killed by a drug lord (Trevor Goddard) than Leigh helped to put behind bars.  Inspired by his dead son’s love of super heroes, Leigh puts on a purple rubber suit and learns karate from Master Yee (John Fujioka) while The Toymaker (Paul Bartel) supplies him with an arsenal of weapons.  Calling himself the Jaguar, Leigh goes after the men who killed his family.

Caulfield wears an obviously fake mustache for the first half of the film so that he can shave it off when he becomes The Jaguar.  The camera never stops spinning around.  Most of the fights look fake and the exterior of Derek’s house changes from shot-to-shot.  Stacy Keach plays a high-ranking government official but doesn’t bother to get a haircut or hide his pony tail.  Linda Blair plays a cop and sounds like she sucked helium before filming her lines.  I’m not sure what she was doing in the movie.  She may not have been sure either.  Prey of the Jaguar is a reminder of just how cheap and cruddy most super hero films were before Marvel took over Hollywood.  Of course, Derek doesn’t really have any super powers, beyond getting proficient at martial arts in record time.  He is just wearing the outfit to honor the spirit of his dead son.  That actually makes more sense than most of the Marvel origin stories.  The movie itself was too cheap to work and the actors were so disinterested that they seemed to actively be trying to make sure that there would never be a Prey of the Jaguar 2.

The most interesting thing about the film are the opening credits, which reveal that this film was executive producer by the Wolf of Wall Street himself, Jordan Belfort.

Shrieker (1998, directed by David DeCoteau)

Six college students decide to stick it to the man by avoiding pricey dorm living and instead squatting in an abandoned hospital.  That makes sense because we all know that college is too damn expensive and that student housing is rip-off.  The students may have made a mistake picking the hospital, though.  Guess what?  That hospital was abandoned for a reason!  Years ago, a “shrieking” murderer killed all of the doctors and the nurses.  Some say the murderer was a crazed patient while others say it was a monster summoned by Satanists.  No sooner has mathematics major Clark (Tanya Dempey) moved into the hospital than everyone starts to hear the sound of shrieks coming from the basement.  Not only is there someone else already living in the basement but, somehow, the Shrieker has also been summoned!  Once people start dying, the suspicion is directed at Clark because she’s the newest resident.  But Clark thinks that, thanks to her skill with numbers and computers, she’s figured out who is actually responsible and how the Shrieker selects its victims.  She may have even figured out how to defeat the Shrieker but will she be able to get anyone to listen to her?

From Charles Band’s Full Moon Entertainment, this is one of those low-budget direct-to-video horror films that used to show up on late night Cinemax.  Unfortunately, it’s pretty tame, with none of the gore or anything else that we typically associate with Full Moon Entertainment.  The Shrieker itself looks good but it’s never around for long and too many of its attacks are just filmed as a sudden close-up of the Shrieker’s face.  The characters are all obnoxious but most of them die so it’s not a problem.  Alison Cuffe plays the role of the token communist with a lot of relish but it’s hard not to wonder what Linnea Quigley could have done with that role.  That would have been something to shriek about.

Creepozoids (1987, directed by David DeCoteau)

In 1992, society collapses due to a nuclear war.  In 1998, a group of army deserters are looking for a place to hide from the authorities when they come across an underground bunker in Los Angeles.  The bunker was once home to a research lab.  Even though all of the scientists are dead, the monster that they created is not and soon, the deserters are fighting for their lives, battling not just the monster but also giant rats.

Creepozoids is a low-budget Alien rip-off.  It’s actually a little incredible just how closely Creepozoids copies Alien, right down to a monster that can spit acid and a scene where someone has a fatal seizure while eating dinner.  The monster itself is not badly realized but the giant rats are obviously just stuffed animals that are being tossed on the cast by crew members standing off-camera.  Though the film takes place in what was then the “near future,” it’s an 80s production all the way through.  The top secret government lab as a bulky computer that only one of the deserters knows how to use.  The secrets to genetic modification are stored on a 8-inch floppy disk.  Most 80s and 90s kids will get nostalgic watching this movie.

One of the deserters is played by Linnea Quigley, which is the main reason why Creepozoids retains a cult following.  While the rest of the deserters want to search the bunker and look for supplies, Linnea’s main concern is trying out the facility’s shower.  (Good news, it works!)  Linnea Quigley appeared in many bad films but she always brought a lot of sincerity and good humor to her performances.  In Creepozoids she gamely wrestles with a stuffed rat and proves herself to be one of the best screamers of the 80s DTV horror industry.  The rest of the cast is interchangeable but, as always, Linnea earns her screen queen crown.

Creepozoids is a lesser imitation of Alien but, seen today, it benefits from nostalgia.  I can still remember Creepozoids showing up on Cinemax, late at night and with a warning that the movie featured not only adult language but also nudity and violence.  (Was anyone ever dissuaded by the Cinemax content warnings?)  This is one of the B-movies that made being an 90s kid fun!

Lifetime Film Review: The Wrong Blind Date (dir by David DeCoteau)

“Looks like he was the wrong blind date!”

You tell them, Vivica A. Fox!

The Wrong Blind Date is the latest of the Lifetime “Wrong” films.  Like all of the “Wrong” films, it was directed by David DeCoteau and it features Vivica A. Fox delivering the film’s title.  It may seem somewhat silly to those who don’t regularly watch these films but, if you’re a fan of the “Wrong” series, you will literally sit through just about anything just for the chance to hear Vivica A. Fox say the movie’s name.  The film’s realize this too.  Lifetime films, at their best, are very self-aware.  None are as self-aware as the “Wrong” films.

In this one, Fox has a supporting role.  She plays Beth, who works as a therapist.  One of her patients is Laura (Meredith Thomas).  Laura has got a lot to deal with.  Her daughter, Hannah (Sofia Masson), has just started going to college and is dating Noah (Rainer Dawn).  Laura and her friend, Angela (Lesli Kay), are trying to launch their own design firm.  Laura is also in the process of getting a divorce from her husband, an abusive ex-cop named Michael (Clark Moore).  Michael is controlling and temperamental and he’s also determined to convince Laura not to go through with the divorce.

When Laura puts her profile on a dating website, she’s shocked by the number of replies that she gets.  One of those replies is from Kevin (Matthew Pohlkamp).  Kevin is handsome and charming and he lives in Beverly Hills.  He lists his job as investment banking.  Kevin has money and he’s so interested in Laura that he even finds a way to contact her after she deletes her dating profile!  At first, Laura thinks that Kevin’s behavior is a little stalkerish but then she agrees to go on one date with him.  And that one date leads to another and then another and then….

But wait a minute!  This is a Lifetime film!  Even more importantly, this is a “Wrong” film.  Those of us who have spent years viewing these movies know better than to trust any perfect man who claims to be wealthy.  Laura may not realize that there’s obviously something sinister about Kevin but we do!  Unfortunately, Laura is so used to her husband acting like a jerk that she’s overly impressed when Kevin does things like refuse to pick a fight with an obnoxious drunk.  It’s only after Laura leaves that Kevin returns to the bar and beats the man up.

Yes, Kevin has some problems.  He’s the wrong blind date.  And it soon becomes apparent that he’s lying about who he is, where he lives, and what he even does for a living.  It’s not a spoiler to tell you that Michael has hired Kevin to fool his wife, all as a part of a rather silly plan to convince Laura to take him back.  But when Kevin starts to become obsessed with Laura, not even Michael can stand in his way.

These films are predictable but fun.  We all know better than to trust Kevin but that doesn’t make it any less enjoyable to watch as Hannah vainly tries to convince her mother that she needs to do a little more research into her new boyfriend’s background.  And, of course, there’s the murders.  There’s always a murder or two in a Lifetime film.  Mereidth Thomas and Sofia Masson are convincing as mother and daughter and Matthew Pohlkamp is credible whether being charming or unhinged.  And, of course, Vivica A. Fox says the name of the movie.  It’s Lifetime, what’s not to enjoy?

Cleaning Out The DVR: The Wrong Cheer Captain (dir by David DeCoteau)

“She definitely picked the wrong cheer captain,” Carol (Vivica A. Fox) says toward the end of Lifetime’s The Wrong Cheer Captain and what else can I say but, “Damn right!”

Seriously, Anna (Sofia Masson) may be a good cheerleader and she may have a lot of experience and she may have even been recruited to go to her new high school so that she could be a member of the cheerleading squad but she definitely should not have been named captain.  Not only is Anna failing her classes and vaping on school grounds but she also has a bad habit of murdering people!  Of course, Anna only commits murder because a past trauma and because she wants so badly to succeed as a cheerleader but still, murdering is definitely not a good habit.  I mean, if the school has a no vaping policy, I can only imagine what their policy on murder would be!

Perhaps a better pick for cheer captain would have been Carol’s daughter, Kate (Alexis Salmon).  Of course, Kate is actually pretty busy trying to prove that Anna murdered her best friend so it’s not like Kate doesn’t already have a lot to deal with.  Oddly enough, even though the evidence overwhelmingly indicates that Anna is murderer, Kate can’t get anyone to listen to her.  The principal is skeptical.  The cheerleading coach just wants to win competitions.  And Kate’s mother keeps trying to blame everything on drugs.  She even orders Kate not to hang out with her boyfriend because of his past use of steroids….

Wow, there’s a lot going on at this high school!  Who knew that the world of high school cheerleading was so ruthless?

Well, everyone.  Everyone knows that high school cheerleading is perhaps the most dangerous activity that someone can involve themselves with, especially if they’re starring in a Lifetime film.  And if you’re in a Lifetime film that has the word “Wrong” in the title, it’s even more dangerous!  I’ve lost track of how many Wrong films David DeCoteau has directed by Lifetime but it certainly does seem like a lot of them feature cheerleaders.  They also all feature Vivica A. Fox, usually playing a no-nonsense authority figure and ending the film by using the title as a way to sum things up.  “It looks like you hired the Wrong Landscaper,” Vivica will say and, even though you didn’t actually do the hiring and he was instead only sent by an agency, you nod and agree because you know better than to openly disagree with Vivica A. Fox.  Instead, you face the truth and admit that, even if it doesn’t seem that way, you were still somehow wrong.

The Wrong films have become a bit of a Lifetime mainstay, loved for their campy melodrama, their Canadian locations, and, of course, Vivica A. Fox.  The Wrong Cheer Captain has a lot in common with the other Wrong films but then again, that’s part of the appeal of these films.  They’re like comfort food.  You watch them because of their comforting familiarity and because you know exactly what you’re going to get.  The Wrong Cheer Captain delivers exactly what it promises, cheerleader mayhem and plenty of different takes on the term “wrong.”  Who could possibly complain about that?

Lifetime Film Review: The Wrong Prince Charming (dir by David DeCoteau)

“It looks like you found the wrong prince charming!” Vivica A. Fox says towards the end of The Wrong Prince Charming.

I’ll admit that I cheered a little when Vivica said the line. If you know anything about Lifetime’s “Wrong” franchise, you know that Vivica A. Fox always plays a sympathetic authority figure who, at some point, says something along the lines of “Looks like he was the Wrong Poolboy” or “He messed with The Wrong Administrative Assistant.” One of the main reasons why people like me look forward to seeing the latest “Wrong” films is to see just how exactly the title is going to be worked into Vivica’s dialogue.

Make no doubt about it, there’s been a lot of “Wrong” films. We’ve had wrong blind dates, wrong tutors, wrong cheerleader coaches, wrong teachers, wrong real estate agents, wrong motel owners, wrong boyfriends, wrong girlfriends, and wrong houseguests. It only makes sense that we would eventually have a wrong Prince Charming.

The title character would be Prince Edward (James Nitti), who claims to be royalty but who, we learn fairly early on, is actually just a con artist who works with his assistant Liam (Jonathan Stoddard) to defraud people and corporations out of their money. Edward may be a charmer but he’s also a charlatan who is not above murdering anyone who he feels might be getting too close to the truth. That’s what greed does to people. That’s bad news for Anna (Cristine Prosperi), who is Edward’s latest target. Anna is an attorney. Among her clients is Bridget (Vivica A. Fox). After watching enough of the “Wrong” films, you really do find yourself wondering if maybe Vivica A. Fox is supposed to be playing the same character in every one of them. Maybe she just changes her name frequently as she travels across Canada and gets involved in thwarting the schemes of the wrong people. It would certainly explain a lot about the Wrong Cinematic Universe.

The thing with Lifetime’s “Wrong” films is that you either get them or you don’t. On the one hand, they’re pure melodrama. On the other hand, they’re also self-aware enough to poke fun at themselves. They’re not meant to be taken seriously, Instead, they’re diverting treats that are designed to keep the audience amused while they wait to hear Vivica pronounce someone to be “the wrong whatever.” They’re designed to be fun and usually, they are. The Wrong Prince Charming, for instance, has fun with the fact that everyone in the audience knows that anyone who claims to be a member of a royal family is probably lying to you. I’ve seen enough emails from enough financially burdened royals to know better than to trust anyone who claims to be a prince. When it comes to The Wrong Prince Charming, a good deal of the fun is to be found in catching all of Edward’s mistakes, all of the little moments when he accidentally lets his cover slip and reveals that he’s just some random commoner with a nice smile.

This is Cristine Prosperi’s 3rd wrong film She was also in The Wrong Cheerleader (“He messed with the wrong cheerleader!”) and The Wrong Neighbor. She’s also appeared in a handful of other recent Lifetime films, including Killer Competition and Murdered At 17. Before that, she played Imogen, the quirky stalker, on the final few seasons of Degrassi. Prosperi always does a good job in these films and the same is true here. She’s a sympathetic lead, even though it’s obvious from the start that she’s picked the wrong prince charming.

The Wrong Prince Charming is silly and fun, the type of movie that’s pretty much made to be watched with a snarky friend. I’m definitely looking forward to the next wrong film!

What Lisa Watched Last Night #214: The Wrong Real Estate Agent (dir by David DeCoteau)

Last night, I watched the first Lifetime premiere of 2021, The Wrong Real Estate Agent!

Why Was I Watching It?

It was the first Lifetime film of 2021 so how couldn’t I watch it?

Add to that, I love the “Wrong” series.  The “Wrong” films are all directed by David DeCoteau and they all feature Vivica A. Fox in a supporting (or, in this case, a lead) role.  These films are always a lot of fun and, since they’re all filmed in Canada, there’s always chance you might spot someone from Degrassi in the cast.

(Admittedly, The Wrong Real Estate Agent is the rare “Wrong” film to feature no one from Degrassi.  But it’s the first Lifetime film of 2021 so we won’t hold that against it.)

What Was It About?

Julie (Vivica A. Fox) and her daughter Maddie (Alaya Lee Walton) have just moved into a wonderful, beautiful house but, unfortunately, they’re renting from the wrong real estate agent!  Charles (Andres Londono) used to date Julie and it’s obvious that he wants to win her back.  However, Charles’s idea of how to win someone back involves a lot of lies and a lot of murder.

Soon after moving into their new home, Julie and Maddie begin hearing strange sounds and seeing weird movement in the shadows.  Most disturbingly to me, someone has been using the shower when Julie’s not home.  Seriously, you don’t use someone else’s shower without asking first!

And let’s not even get started on the mysterious room that’s always locked off….

What Worked?

Vivica A. Fox has appeared in all of the “Wrong” films but usually, she’s cast in a supporting role.  She usually plays some sort of no nonsense authority figure who shows up at the end of the film to announce, “He messed with the wrong cheerleader” or “He was the wrong wholesale jewelry importer” or something like that.  In The Wrong Real Estate Agent, she played the lead role and it was a nice change of pace.  I thought she did a good job in the lead role, even if Julie sometimes seemed to be impossibly naïve.

Alaya Lee Walton also did a good job as Julie’s daughter, Maddie.  She and Fox were very believable as mother and daughter and their relationship rang true.

Finally, I loved the house!  That may sound like a small compliment but seriously, a good Lifetime film always features a great house.  So far, the “Wrong” series has been very good about using the right house.  If I ever do move to Canada, it’s going to be because of both Degrassi and the numerous Canadian produced Lifetime films that have left me convinced that every house in Toronto is a mansion.

What Did Not Work?

Charles was just a little bit too obviously crazy.  In general, it’s a good idea to suspend your disbelief when it comes to a Lifetime film and to just kind of go with whatever happens but, in this case, Charles really was so obviously unstable that you kind of wondered how anyone played by Vivica A. Fox could be naïve enough to trust him.

“Oh my God!  Just like me!” Moments

I related to Maddie, particularly when she argued with her mom about whether or not she should shut the window in her bedroom.  Her mom thought the open window was an invitation to sickness and danger.  Maddie knew that she had to keep the window so her boyfriend could sneak in and out of the house.  Of course, Maddie couldn’t explain that was the reason why the window needed to be open but, to her credit, Maddie stayed her calm and talked her mom into letting her keep the window open until it was time for bed.  Good job, Maddie!  I wish I had been that good at winning arguments when I was that age.

Lessons Learned

When it comes to renting or buying a house, make sure you’ve got the right real estate agent.  Because the wrong real estate agent will not only try to get you to go out of your price range (that’s something I learned from watching House Hunters) but he’ll eventually try to kill you as well.

The other thing I learned is that every profession has at least one wrong person.  Someday, I’m hoping to see a film called The Wrong Administrative Assistant or maybe The Wrong Stunt Double.  Seriously, this series can go on until the end of time.

Lifetime Film Review: The Wrong Wedding Planner (dir by David DeCoteau)

“She was the wrong wedding planner!” says Detective Jones (Vivica A. Jones) in the Lifetime film, The Wrong Wedding Planner, and Detective Jones has a point!  Typically, a good wedding planner will put together a memorable wedding without trying to kill the bride.  I mean, I’m sure that there have been murderous but talented wedding planners in the past because, let’s face it, we all go a little bit crazy when it comes to planning the perfect wedding but, for the most part, the aim is for the bride to survive.

Of course, in her defense, Mandy (Kristin Booth) isn’t really a wedding planner.  Though she pretends to be one when she approaches Ashley (Yan-Kay Crystal Lowe), that’s just because Mandy is looking for an excuse to barge into Ashley’s life.  Ashley is engaged to Brad (Steve Richard Harris) and Brad used to be engaged to Mandy.  Needless to say, things did not end well between Brad and Mandy.  Now, Mandy is not only planning the perfect wedding but she’s also looking for revenge!

Will Mandy get her revenge and, more importantly, will Ashley get her perfect wedding?  That’s the question at the heart of The Wrong Wedding Planner.  To be honest, there’s been a lot of Lifetime films like this one and I’ve enjoyed every single one of them because they all deal with some universal truths.  Everyone wants a big and expensive wedding and everyone wants to live in a big and expensive house.  Seriously, Brad’s house is huge and wonderful and I’m pretty sure that I’ve seen it in a few other “Wrong” films as well.  Of course, as soon as Mandy gets into the house, the first thing she does is plant a bunch of hidden cameras so that she can spy on Brad and Ashley.  I probably would have done the same thing but not because I wanted to watch Brad and Ashley make love in the bedroom.  Instead, I would have just wanted to take in the fabulous job that Brad and Ashley did decorating the house.  I mean, seriously, they should be proud.

Mandy’s a bit crazy and Kristin Booth does a good job playing her.  The thing I like about Mandy was that she was totally unapologetic about trying to ruin everyone’s lives.  She didn’t waste any time trying to justify her behavior.  Instead, she just showed up like a wrecking ball and started destroying everything in her path.  She was a force of nature, as any wedding planner should be.

So, yes, Mandy may have been the wrong wedding planer but, in the end, I think she helped to bring Ashley and Brad closer together and she taught them an important lesson about why honesty is important in a relationship.  That’s not a bad accomplishment when you’re not even really a wedding planner.  When I get married, I only hope that my wedding planner is as dedicated to Mandy.  Hopefully, of course, she’ll also be a little bit less crazy than Mandy but then again, sometimes a little insanity is what you need to make your special day perfect.

Lifetime Film Review: The Wrong Stepfather (dir by David DeCoteau)

“He was the wrong stepfather!” Principal Higgins (Vivica A. Fox) announces towards the end of The Wrong Stepfather and she’s got a point.

Admittedly, Craig (Corin Nemec) might seem like a nice guy.  He’s a college guidance counselor who specializes in helping out single moms who are worried that their daughters might not be able to get into college.  Craig will do anything to help out.  He rewrite an admissions essay.  He’ll change grades.  He’ll do just about anything.  Craig is all about family and nothing brings a family together like someone getting into a good college.  Of course, sometimes might break the law or violate the code of ethics in his quest to get everyone into college but that’s just to make sure that no one ever snitches on him.  I mean, that makes sense, doesn’t it?  It’s all about family!

Unfortunately, Craig is so into family that it sometimes leads to him going a little bit crazy.  Yes, Craig is a bit unhinged.  Sarah (Sydney Malakeh) suspects as much as soon as she meets Craig but, unfortunately, Craig is dating her mom (Krista Allen) and everyone else seems to be crazy about him.  Everyone seems to believe that Craig will make the perfect stepfather!  Everyone except for Sarah that is.

The Wrong Stepfather is not only an entry in Lifetime’s Wrong series but it’s also basically a remake of the classic thriller, The Stepfather.  Corin Nemec steps into the shoes of Terry O’Quinn, playing the role of the friendly guy who has anger issues and is just a little bit too obsessed with creating the perfect family.  Nemec does a pretty good job with the role.  Nemec’s a naturally likable actor so any film that features him as a villain will automatically feel a bit subversive.  Nemec’s best scenes are the ones where he intimidates the high school guidance counselor, Mr. Crane (William McNamara).  Nemec and McNamara are two pros when it comes to handling Lifetime melodrama and it’s fun to watch them play off of each other.

As for the rest of the film, I enjoyed it.  You pretty much know that Craig is going to be bad news as soon as he shows up but that sense of familiarity is one of the things that makes a film like this fun.  You don’t necessarily watch a Lifetime film to be surprised.  Instead, you watch them with the knowledge that you will always be one step ahead of the other people in the film.  Sydney Malakeh and Krista Allen make for a believe mother-and-daughter team and it must be said that, for a family that’s apparently struggling financially, they live in a very nice house.  Never underestimate the importance of a nice house in a Lifetime film.  It’s one of the reasons why so many of us watch them!

Anyway, Craig may indeed be the wrong stepfather but he’s the right villain for this movie.  Watch it the next time you’re wondering how you’re ever going to be able to pay for college.  Maybe the wrong stepfather could help you out!

Lifetime Film Review: The Wrong House Sitter (dir by David DeCoteau)

Kirsten (Anna Marie Dobbins) is a professional house sitter who is looking for work.

Dan (Jason-Shane Scott) owns a house.

What could go wrong!?

Well, it turns out that quite a lot can go wrong.  Kirsten may be a house sitter and she may have a few good references and she even shows up with a contract for Dan to sign, which seems very professional, but that doesn’t mean that Kirsten is the right house sitter.  In fact, it turns out that she’s the wrong house sitter and that contract basically gives her the right to stay in the house for as long as she wants.  Dan’s a writer and really, he should have known better than to sign a contract without actually reading it but …. well, he was in a hurry that morning.

So anyway, Kirsten is now living in Dan’s house and telling everyone that she is Dan’s girlfriend, despite the fact that Dan has a girlfriend named Mary (Ciarra Carter).  (Dan also has an editor named Debbie, who is played by Vivica A. Fox.  It’s not a Lifetime “wrong” movie without Vivica A. Fox in a supporting role.)  Dan can either give up the house or he can stay in the house and hope that he finds a way to get Kirsten out of his life.

Really, Dan should have known better than to have hired Kirsten in the first place.  When they first met, it was in a bookstore and Kirsten was talking about how much she loved Atlas Shrugged.  Dan suggested that she check out The Fountainhead.  I’m a libertarian and even I know that its time to run whenever someone says that Atlas Shrugged is their favorite book.  Personally, I would have suggested that both he and Kirsten read Anthem, which gives you all the Ayn Rand you could want but which doesn’t require you to spend half a year reading it.

Regardless, Dan did hire Kirsten and now he’s stuck with her.  And Kirsten really, really wants to make things work with Dan.  In fact, she’s so determined to make things work that she’s willing to kill.  It’s a Lifetime movie, folks.  People are always willing to kill.

Anyway, our regular readers know that I like the “wrong” films, largely because they always seem to feature the nicest houses that one could hope to find in Canada.  Dan’s house is really nice and you can understand why he wouldn’t want to give it up.  The pool alone is worth a few murders.  I mean, I would have totally been up to house sit that particular home and I wouldn’t have been as dangerous about it either.  (Seriously, house sitting is a lot of fun!  You get to sleep in a stranger’s bed without having to worry about seeing them in the morning.)  Jason-Shane Scott has appeared in a few of these films and he brings his well-meaning charm to the role of Dan.  Anna Marie Dobbins is appropriately crazed as the house sitter and Vivica A. Fox, as always, does good work as the no-nonsense authority figure.

Watch it the next time you’re tempted to let a stranger live in your house for a week.