The Eric Roberts Collection: Hansel & Gretel: Warriors of Witchcraft (dir by David DeCoteau)


In 2013’s Hansel & Gretel: Warriors of Witchcraft, Ella (Fivel Stewart) and Jonah (Booboo Stewart) are twins who are sent to an exclusive private school.  The private school is so exclusive that many of the students are the descendants of former students.  If you don’t have the right lineage, you’re not attending this school.

Ella and Jonah soon discover that this isn’t your everyday private school.  Instead, the student body is made up of witches and wizards and so are the majority of the teachers.  Ella and Jonah also discover that they are being targeted.  Can they defeat the other witches and wizards and will their school ever beat Hogwarts at Quidditch?

Now, technically, Hogwarts is never mentioned in this film and no one ever plays Quidditch but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out which insanely popular series of books and films inspired Hansel & Gretel: Warriors of Witchcraft.  There are a few references to witches in the woods and children being eaten but this film definitely has more in common with the works of J.K. Rowling than the work of the Brothers Grimm.  It’s a fairly silly film but it’s enjoyable enough, if you’re a fan of director David DeCoteau’s unique aesthetic.  That means plenty of cheap special effects, a few names in the cast, one scene of gratuitous shirtlessness for Booboo Stewart, and an open-ended conclusion, just in case someone was willing to pay for a sequel.

Eric Roberts plays Mr. Sebastian.  He’s the kind-hearted headmaster at the school.  He doesn’t appear in many scenes but, as always, it’s nice to see Eric Roberts playing a nice guy for once.  At one point, Mr. Sebastian explains what is going on at the school and it doesn’t make the least bit of sense but I guess that’s magic for you.

Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed:

  1. Paul’s Case (1980)
  2. Star 80 (1983)
  3. Runaway Train (1985)
  4. To Heal A Nation (1988)
  5. Best of the Best (1989)
  6. Blood Red (1989)
  7. The Ambulance (1990)
  8. The Lost Capone (1990)
  9. Best of the Best II (1993)
  10. Love, Cheat, & Steal (1993)
  11. Voyage (1993)
  12. Freefall (1994)
  13. Love Is A Gun (1994)
  14. Sensation (1994)
  15. Dark Angel (1996)
  16. Doctor Who (1996)
  17. Most Wanted (1997)
  18. The Alternate (2000)
  19. Mercy Streets (2000)
  20. Tripfall (2000)
  21. Raptor (2001)
  22. Rough Air: Danger on Flight 534 (2001)
  23. Strange Frequency (2001)
  24. Wolves of Wall Street (2002)
  25. Border Blues (2004)
  26. Mr. Brightside (2004)
  27. Six: The Mark Unleased (2004)
  28. We Belong Together (2005)
  29. Hey You (2006)
  30. Cyclops (2008)
  31. Depth Charge (2008)
  32. Amazing Racer (2009)
  33. The Chaos Experiment (2009)
  34. In The Blink of an Eye (2009)
  35. Bed & Breakfast (2010)
  36. Enemies Among Us (2010)
  37. The Expendables (2010) 
  38. Groupie (2010)
  39. Sharktopus (2010)
  40. Beyond The Trophy (2012)
  41. The Dead Want Women (2012)
  42. Deadline (2012)
  43. The Mark (2012)
  44. Miss Atomic Bomb (2012)
  45. The Night Never Sleeps (2012)
  46. Snow White: A Deadly Summer (2012)
  47. Assault on Wall Street (2013)
  48. Bonnie And Clyde: Justified (2013)
  49. Lovelace (2013)
  50. The Mark: Redemption (2013)
  51. The Perfect Summer (2013)
  52. Revelation Road: The Beginning of the End (2013)
  53. Revelation Road 2: The Sea of Glass and Fire (2013)
  54. Self-Storage (2013)
  55. Sink Hole (2013)
  56. A Talking Cat!?! (2013)
  57. This Is Our Time (2013)
  58. Bigfoot vs DB Cooper (2014)
  59. Doc Holliday’s Revenge (2014)
  60. Eternity: The Movie (2014)
  61. Inherent Vice (2014)
  62. Road to the Open (2014)
  63. Rumors of War (2014)
  64. So This Is Christmas (2014)
  65. Amityville Death House (2015)
  66. Deadly Sanctuary (2015)
  67. A Fatal Obsession (2015)
  68. Las Vegas Story (2015)
  69. Sorority Slaughterhouse (2015)
  70. Stalked By My Doctor (2015)
  71. Story of Eva (2015)
  72. Enemy Within (2016)
  73. Hunting Season (2016)
  74. Joker’s Poltergeist (2016)
  75. Prayer Never Fails (2016)
  76. Stalked By My Doctor: The Return (2016)
  77. The Wrong Roommate (2016)
  78. Dark Image (2017)
  79. The Demonic Dead (2017)
  80. Black Wake (2018)
  81. Frank and Ava (2018)
  82. Stalked By My Doctor: Patient’s Revenge (2018)
  83. The Wrong Teacher (2018)
  84. Clinton Island (2019)
  85. Monster Island (2019)
  86. The Reliant (2019)
  87. The Savant (2019)
  88. Seven Deadly Sins (2019)
  89. Stalked By My Doctor: A Sleepwalker’s Nightmare (2019)
  90. The Wrong Mommy (2019)
  91. Exodus of a Prodigal Son (2020)
  92. Free Lunch Express (2020)
  93. Hard Luck Love Song (2020)
  94. Her Deadly Groom (2020)
  95. Law of Attraction (2020)
  96. Top Gunner (2020)
  97. Deadly Nightshade (2021)
  98. The Elevator (2021)
  99. Just What The Doctor Ordered (2021)
  100. Killer Advice (2021)
  101. Megaboa (2021)
  102. Night Night (2021)
  103. The Poltergeist Diaries (2021)
  104. The Rebels of PT-218 (2021)
  105. Red Prophecies (2021)
  106. A Town Called Parable (2021)
  107. The Wrong Mr. Right (2021)
  108. Bleach (2022)
  109. Dawn (2022)
  110. My Dinner With Eric (2022)
  111. 69 Parts (2022)
  112. The Rideshare Killer (2022)
  113. The Wrong High School Sweetheart (2022)
  114. The Company We Keep (2023)
  115. D.C. Down (2023)
  116. If I Can’t Have You (2023)
  117. Megalodon: The Frenzy (2023)
  118. Aftermath (2024)
  119. Bad Substitute (2024)
  120. Devil’s Knight (2024)
  121. Insane Like Me? (2024)
  122. Space Sharks (2024)
  123. The Wrong Life Coach (2024)
  124. Broken Church (2025)
  125. Shakey Grounds (2025)
  126. When It Rains In L.A. (2025)

The Eric Roberts Collection: Bonnie And Clyde: Justified (dir by David DeCoteau)


2013’s Bonnie and Clyde: Justified opens with a long-haired Eric Roberts introducing himself as legendary Texas Ranger Frank Hamer.  Speaking straight to the camera, Roberts-as-Hamer warns us against idolizing the notorious Depression-era outlaws Bonnie and Clyde.  They were murderers!, Hamer tells us with all the fervor of a tent revival preacher.

We then flashback to Bonnie (Ashley Hayes) and Clyde (Jim Poole) driving down a country road.  Clyde is behind the wheel.  Bonnie, a redhead like me!, reads aloud her latest poem about what it’s like to be a notorious outlaw.  Suddenly, Hamer and his men appear on the roadside and open fire.

We then start yet another flashback.  15 year-old Bonnie marries good-for-nothing Roy (Julian Brand) while Clyde and his brother Buck (Hagen Mills) steal a truck full of turkeys.  Jump forward to 1929 and Bonnie is unhappily married and working in a diner that we’re told is in Dallas, Texas.  Oddly enough, there’s a lot of mountains in the background.  I live in North Texas and I can assure you that, as much as things have changed here over the past few years, one thing has always remained the same.  There are no mountains in Dallas County.

Eventually, Bonnie meets Clyde, they fall in love, and they rob banks.  At least, that’s what we’re told.  The majority of the film is told through sepia-toned still shots and newspaper headlines.  Clyde attempts to escape from prison but we don’t actually see him do it.  Instead, we just see a headline.  Bonnie and Clyde rob banks but, again, we don’t really see it as much as we hear about it.  Even when people die during the robberies, we don’t really learn the exact circumstances that led to Clyde opening fire.  Ashley Hayes actually gives a good performance as Bonnie and her scrappy interpretation of the character is probably closer to the truth than Faye Dunaway’s.  As for Jim Poole, he’s much better-looking than the real Clyde Barrow and that’s a good thing.  Who wants to watch an ugly bank robber?  There’s a reason why my distant-relation Pretty Boy Floyd remains a legend.  As for the title, you may be wondering what exactly was justified about Bonnie and Clyde.  You can argue that they were justified in doing what they had to do in order to survive during the Great Depression.  Or you can argue that Frank Hamer was justified in ambushing them.  Or you can assume the film was trying to appeal to (or perhaps just tricks) fans of the Justified television series.  Or you can just not worry about it.

This is the story of Bonnie and Clyde on a budget.  It came out in 2013, presumably to coincide with a 4-hour Bonnie and Clyde miniseries that was airing on A&E at the time.  To be honest, you have to respect the nerve of a film about Bonnie and Clyde that doesn’t actually feature much of them doing what they were famous for.  Cheers to director David DeCoteau for sticking with it and giving Eric Roberts top-billing for a cameo appearance.  And cheers to Eric Roberts for just being Eric Roberts.

Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed:

  1. Star 80 (1983)
  2. Blood Red (1989)
  3. The Ambulance (1990)
  4. The Lost Capone (1990)
  5. Love, Cheat, & Steal (1993)
  6. Love Is A Gun (1994)
  7. Sensation (1994)
  8. Dark Angel (1996)
  9. Doctor Who (1996)
  10. Most Wanted (1997)
  11. Wolves of Wall Street (2002)
  12. Mr. Brightside (2004)
  13. Six: The Mark Unleased (2004)
  14. Hey You (2006)
  15. In The Blink of an Eye (2009)
  16. Enemies Among Us (2010)
  17. The Expendables (2010) 
  18. Sharktopus (2010)
  19. The Dead Want Women (2012)
  20. Deadline (2012)
  21. The Mark (2012)
  22. Miss Atomic Bomb (2012)
  23. Lovelace (2013)
  24. The Mark: Redemption (2013)
  25. Self-Storage (2013)
  26. This Is Our Time (2013)
  27. Inherent Vice (2014)
  28. Road to the Open (2014)
  29. Rumors of War (2014)
  30. Amityville Death House (2015)
  31. A Fatal Obsession (2015)
  32. Stalked By My Doctor (2015)
  33. Enemy Within (2016)
  34. Joker’s Poltergeist (2016)
  35. Prayer Never Fails (2016)
  36. Stalked By My Doctor: The Return (2016)
  37. The Wrong Roommate (2016)
  38. Dark Image (2017)
  39. Black Wake (2018)
  40. Stalked By My Doctor: Patient’s Revenge (2018)
  41. Clinton Island (2019)
  42. Monster Island (2019)
  43. The Savant (2019)
  44. Seven Deadly Sins (2019)
  45. Stalked By My Doctor: A Sleepwalker’s Nightmare (2019)
  46. The Wrong Mommy (2019)
  47. Exodus of a Prodigal Son (2020)
  48. Free Lunch Express (2020)
  49. Her Deadly Groom (2020)
  50. Top Gunner (2020)
  51. Deadly Nightshade (2021)
  52. Just What The Doctor Ordered (2021)
  53. Killer Advice (2021)
  54. The Poltergeist Diaries (2021)
  55. The Rebels of PT-218 (2021)
  56. A Town Called Parable (2021)
  57. Bleach (2022)
  58. My Dinner With Eric (2022)
  59. Aftermath (2024)
  60. The Wrong Life Coach (2024)