Retro Television Review: Homicide: Life On The Street 5.5. “ME, Myself, and I”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC!  It  can be viewed on Peacock.

This week, the show gets a new co-star.

Episode 5.5 “M.E., Myself, and I”

(Dir by Michael Fields, originally aired on November 1st, 1996)

There’s a new medical examiner in town!  Julianna Cox (Michelle Forbes) drinks too much, smokes too much, and she takes her job personally!  She drives too fast!  She speaks her mind!  She fires the incompetent and the corrupt!  She shows up at crime scenes!  Lewis moves a body before Dr. Cox arrives.  She tells him to never do it again!

She’s a new regular and this entire episode is essentially dedicated to hitting us over the head with the fact that she’s awesome.  And she is awesome and she’s also played by Michelle Forbes so I’m sure she will be a worthwhile addition to the show’s ensemble.  That said, this episode sometimes seem to be so desperate to convince us that we’re going to love Dr. Cox that it forgets to craft a compelling story.  She helps Bayliss to solve a case.  Bayliss likes her.  Well, Bayliss like everyone.  Indeed, Bayliss gets so excited whenever an attractive woman appears that he sometimes seems like a cartoon wolf, with his eyes popping out of his head.

In other news, Kellerman is still under investigation and he’s not taking it well.  The great Edward Herrmann played the officious FBI agent who took over the Box and spent the episode asking the other Homicide detectives if Kellerman seemed to be corrupt.  “How did Detective Kellerman afford a new boat?”  Actually, how did Detective Kellerman afford a new boat?

Pembleton went off his blood pressure meds so he could make love to his wife on his anniversary.  Pembleton — how are you going to recover from this stroke if you keep finding excuses not to take your medication?

Finally, Brodie got kicked out of Bayliss’s apartment so he moved in with Lewis.  Brodie praised a black velvet painting of Teddy Pendergrass, leading to a fight between Lewis and his wife.  It was an amusing scene.  Brodie, you stand accused of murdering a marriage!  The jury finds you guilty!

It was an okay episode.  Homicide is one of those shows that is enjoyable watch because of the ensemble and Michelle Forbes seems like she’ll be a good addition.  When you’ve got a cast this good, you can get away with an episode where not that much really happens.

Scene That I Love: Tom Noonan in Heat


Today would have been the birthday of actor Tom Noonan. Today’s scene that I love is a short scene featuring Noonan from 1995’s Heat. Noonan doesn’t have a lot of screentime but his character is key to the plot. In this scene, Noonan shows how much a great character actor can do, even with limited screentime.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special 1993 Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

Today, we pay tribute to the year 1993 with….

4 Shots From 4 1993 Films

Mi Vida Loca (1993, dir by Allison Anders, DP: Rodrigo Garcia)

Short Cuts (1993, dir by Robert Altman, DP: Walt Lloyd)

Sliver (1993, dir by Phillip Noyce, DP: Vilmos Zsigmond)

The Last Action Hero (1993, directed by John McTiernan, DP: Dean Semler)

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 4/5/26 — 4/11/26


Diff’rent Strokes (Tubi)

It wasn’t by choice!  On Wednesday, I watched a movie on Tubi and then Tubi sent me to an episode of Diff’rent Strokes before I could stop it.  Mr. Drummond’s friend, Larry (McClean Stevenson), visited from Oregon.  Drummond got Larry a chance to audition for his own talk show.  Larry’s daughter (Kim Richards) didn’t want to move and, for some reason, she blamed the whole thing on Gary Coleman.

Fridays (Prime)

This was a comedy sketch show from the early 80s.  I watched the premiere episode on Saturday morning.  There were a lot of familiar faces in the cast, including a dark-haired Larry David.  Unfortunately, none of the skits were really that funny.

The Greatest Event In Television History (Prime)

In this Adult Swim series, Adam Scott recreated the opening credits of classic television shows and destroyed his life in the process.  Jeff Probst hosted.  Jon Hamm guest-starred and “died” shortly after filming his scenes.  (Don’t worry, his ghost later appeared.)  Paul Rudd slept with Adam’s wife.  Host Jeff Probst said, “Adam’s life is now ruined.”   Billy Joel played piano.  I watched all four episodes on Tuesday and it was funnier than it had any right to be.

Jesus of Nazareth (Tubi)

On Easter, I binged this seven hour miniseries from 1977.  Written by Anthony Burgess and directed by Franco Zeffirelli, this gorgeously produced production took the idea of having an all-star cast quite literally.  Even the minor roles were played by familiar faces, everyone from Donald Pleasence to Rod Steiger to Ernest Borgnine to James Earl Jones, Ian McShane, Laurence Olivier, Stacy Keach, Christopher Plummer, and Michael York.  Olivia Hussey played the Virgin Mary.  Anne Bancroft played the Magdalene.  It was very well-done and surprisingly moving.

The Masters (Prime and Paramount+)

I watched a bit of the Masters this week.  On Saturday, when it was storming outside and I had just returned from attending a memorial service for an old friend of my father’s, it provided a nice distraction.

Nero Wolfe (A&E)

I watched the final two episodes of Nero Wolfe on Tuesday.  It was a truly entertaining show, featuring great work from Maury Chaykin and Timothy Hutton.  It’s a shame that it was canceled after only two seasons.

Sledgehammer (Prime)

This was an 80s sitcom, featuring David Rasche as an out-of-control cop.  I watched two episodes on Friday and it was actually pretty funny.  Rasche talked to his gun and made fun of liberals.  I enjoyed it.

I also watched and reviewed:

  1. 1st & Ten
  2. Baywatch
  3. CHiPs
  4. Decoy
  5. Freddy’s Nightmares
  6. Highway to Heaven
  7. The Love Boat
  8. Miami Vice
  9. Pacific Blue
  10. Saved By The Bell
  11. Saved By The Bell: The New Class
  12. St. Elsewhere

Late Night Retro Television Review: Saved By The Bell 1.17 “Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell, which ran on NBC from 1989 to 1993.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime and Tubi!

This week, we have perhaps the dumbest 30 minutes of television ever.

Episode 1.17 “Close Encounters of the Nerd Kind”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 23rd, 1990)

After breaking the school’s video camera, Zack and the gang need to come up with some money and they need to do it quickly!  They see that a tabloid will pay money for pictures of an alien so they send in a picture of Screech.  Thompson (Sean Masterson) turns up at the school to investigate the claim.  Screech pretends to be an alien.  Uh-oh, Thompson’s from the government and he wants to dissect Screech!

This is without a doubt the stupidest episode of Saved By The Bell that I’ve ever seen and that’s saying something.  Everyone in the school — including freaking Mr. Belding — puts on a mask to show Thompson that he’s been fooled.

That’s not very nice, Thompson says.

Neither is telling a bunch of kids you’re from a magazine, Belding replies.

What does that even mean, Belding?

Seriously, I try to cut this show some slack but even when I was an occasionally stoned college student watching Saved By The Bell so I’d have something other to do other than study, I still groaned whenever this episode came on.

Did they ever fix the video camera?  They should have let the government have Screech.

Retro Television Review: Baywatch 1.19 “The Big Race”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch, which ran on NBC and then in syndication from 1989 to 2001.  The entire show can be viewed on Tubi.

Cort needs money!

Episode 1.19 “The Big Race”

(Dir by Kevin Inch, originally aired on March 16th, 1990)

This episode opens with Cort trying to impress a woman who is convinced that he’s rich.  He and Eddie illegally break into someone else’s yacht and Eddie dressed up in a tuxedo so he can pretend to be Cort’s butler.  The meeting goes well into the woman asks Cort to donate $10,000 to a retirement home and Cort impulsively says yes.

Now, he has to come up with $10,000!

Luckily, there’s a water ski race coming up and the grand prize is $15,000.  Cort, Mitch, and Craig enter and …. well, do you need me to tell you that they win despite the efforts of a bunch of snobby vandals?

Meanwhile, Shauni is scared to get in the water.  She’s haunted by slow motion flashbacks of Jill getting attacked by that shark.  (This is the rare episode of Baywatch that actually acknowledges that something that happened in another episode.)  I guess Shauni’s going to have to quit being a lifeguard now.  Oh wait — luckily, someone almost drowns and Shauni’s instincts overpower her fear.  With the help of Michael Newman — NEWMIE! — Shauni finds the courage to do her job.

At least Shauni is still mourning Jill.  No one else seems to care.  Seriously, if you think about it — two lifeguards have died in the line of duty over the past two weeks and no one really seems that upset about it.

No wonder some people stand in the darkness.

Live Tweet Alert: Watch Arcade With #ScarySocial!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, for #ScarySocial, I will be hosting 1993’s Arcade!

If you want to join us on Saturday night, just hop onto twitter, start the film at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag!  The film is available on Prime!  I’ll be there co-hosting and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well.  It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy!

 

Scenes That I Love: “I Love The Smell of Napalm in the Morning” from Apocalypse Now (Happy birthday, John Milius!)


Today, the Shattered Lens celebrates the 82nd birthday of the iconic screenwriter and director, John Milius!

While director Francis Ford Coppola definitely put his own stamp on 1979’s Apocalypse Now, the film started life as a script written by John Milius and the film itself is full of dialogue that could only have been written by Milius.  The most famous example is Robert Duvall’s monologue about the smell of napalm in the morning.  Actually, the entire helicopter attack feels like pure Milius.  Reportedly, Duvall’s character was originally named Colonel Kharnage but, by the time the movie was made, his name had become Kilgore.  It’s still not exactly a subtle name but it’s not quite as obvious as Kharnage.

(When James Caan read the script, he loved the role so much that he was offended to not be offered it and, as a result, he turned down offers to play not only Willard but also Kurtz.)

Happy birthday, John Milius!

“Someday, this war is going to end.”