Lisa Marie’s Grindhouse Trailers: The Supersized Richard Lynch Edition!


On June 20th, it was announced that the body of veteran character actor Richard Lynch had been found at his home.  Richard Lynch was never a household name but, if you’re a fan of exploitation and grindhouse cinema, you’ve probably seen him at least a few times.  He was the tall, blonde actor with the scarred face who was alway either killing people or having them killed.  Richard Lynch was one of those actors who, as soon as he showed up on-screen, you knew he was the bad guy. 

As an actor, Lynch always brought something special to even the simplest of his roles.  He was always the villain who you knew would probably easily kill the hero if the two of them ever met in the real world.  He was so good at being bad that you often couldn’t help but root for him. 

I first became aware of Richard Lynch when I bought a movie called Premonition on DVD.  This atmospheric 1976 film featured Richard Lynch in the role of a villainous yet oddly sympathetic carnival clown-turned-kidnapper.  When Lynch was on-screen, I literally could not look away.  Even better, the DVD included an interview with the now white-haired Richard Lynch in which he discussed his career.  Imagine my surprise to discover that this rather creepy and scary-looking actor was actually a very articulate and witty man.

A few days after I saw Premonition, I watched another 1976 film on DVD.  This one was Larry Cohen’s Gold Told Me To and, to my surprise, it also featured Richard Lynch. This time, he was cast as an alien messiah who inspired all sorts of mayhem in New York City.  From that moment on, Richard Lynch was one of my favorite of the old exploitation actors. 

After Richard Lynch’s body was found, there were several news stories that mentioned his passing.  Almost all of those stories repeated the story that Lynch’s distinctive facial scars were the result of him setting himself on fire as the result of bad LSD trip in 1967.  A few mentioned that he was a longtime friend of Al Pacino’s.  Most of them took a rather dismissive attitude towards the majority of Lynch’s films.

Over at the A.V. Club, a respectful article was posted and it was quickly followed by a bunch of snarky comments from the usual gang of toadsuckers, the majority of whom didn’t seem to know who Richard Lynch was (presumably because he never guest starred on Arrested Development).

In fact, it seemed like the only place that Richard Lynch got the proper amount of respect was on twitter.  And that’s a shame because an actor like Richard Lynch deserved a lot more.

The sad thing is that actors like Richard Lynch are rarely appreciated because elitist (and wannabe elitist) filmgoers and critics are rarely willing to admit that it does take a certain amount of talent to be an effective and memorable villain.  As an actor, Richard Lynch appeared in some good films and he also appeared in a lot of very bad films but he always gave a good performance.  Unlike so many other actors, he never used subpar material as an excuse to give a subpar performance.  Regardless of the films he found himself in, he always gave it his best and that’s why this super-sized edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers is dedicated to Richard Lynch.

1) God Told Me To (1976)

Arguably, this film from director Larry Cohen was the best movie that Richard Lynch ever appeared in.  Though he doesn’t get a lot of screen time in either the film or the trailer, he easily dominates both, if just for the fact that Lynch plays the God of the title.

2) Deathsport (1978)

Richard Lynch vs. David Carradine.

3) The Sword and The Sorcerer (1982)

Though I haven’t seen it, this film is a favorite of many of my fellow contributors here at the Shattered Lens.

4) Cut and Run (1985)

This film was directed by Ruggero Deodato and apparently, it gained a certain amount of fame after it was banned in several countries.  I’ve seen it on DVD and all I can say is that this is one of the most misleading trailers ever made.  However, this film also features one of Richard Lynch’s most intimidating performances.

5) Savage Dawn (1985)

For some reason, I doubt that the character being played by Richard Lynch is a real priest.

6) Invasion USA (1985)

Judging from the response to Richard Lynch’s death on twitter, this Chuck Norris movie might be the film that he’s best known for.

7) The Barbarians (1987)

This film, which appears to feature Richard Lynch in full villain mode, was also directed by Ruggero Deodato.

8) Bad Dreams (1988)

Richard Lynch is all sorts of creepy in this trailer.  Knowing about his own true life story makes this trailer all the more odd to watch.

9) Trancers 2 (1992)

Helen Hunt’s in this?

10) Werewolf (1996)

This one looks like fun, to be honest.

11) Wedding Slashers (2006)

“Til death do us part…”

12) Mil Mascaras Vs. The Aztec Mummy (2006)

Finally, let’s finish things up with the trailer for this Mexican film in which Richard Lynch was cast as the President of the United States.

Richard Lynch, R.I.P.

6 Trailers To Help Dry Lisa’s Tears


Oh my God, yesterday sucked. 

First off, I was supposed to be seeing Capt. America but when we were standing in line to get our tickets, I started to feel dizzy and then I kinda sorta ended up fainting.  Which I know sounds like something serious but, to be honest, I faint all the time.  I’m like a Tennessee Williams heroine that way.  It’s no big deal except to my sister and my boyfriend who decided that instead of going to the movies, I should go home, lay down, rest, and “take care of myself.”  so, I told them that they were crazy and that I was perfectly fine and they were like, “You’re so full of it, Lisa Marie,” and then I stood up to show them how healthy I was and I guess I didn’t put my feet on the ground correctly because suddenly, I was going down again and anyway, long story short, I ended up being dragged back to the house.

And then once I got back home, one of my longtime twitter followers suddenly decided to unfollow me because apparently, I haven’t been a good enough friend to him.  Which I found interesting considering that I had just spent the past week literally holding his hand while he attempted to get over not one but two girls who never liked him in the first place.  So, yeah, learning that despite my best efforts, I’m apparently just a self-centered bitch who foolishly uses twitter to talk about what I want to talk about as opposed to devoting all of my time to helping some asshole deal with problems that a 12 year-old should be able to freaking handle, well, that kinda sorta hurt my feelings just a little bit.  (Contrary to popular opinion, redheads with big boobs actually do have feelings.  Go figure!) 

However, things are not a complete bust.  First off, as I type this, I’m watching the old episode of Degrassi where Emma and Alex have that huge fight in the school hallway while Paige and Spinner skip school and Ashley gets dressed up like Elvis and then Mr. Simpson finds out his cancer is in remission.  I love that episode.  And, along with watching Degrassi, I’m also putting together the latest edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers.

Things are looking up already.

1) Last House On The Left (1972)

Yep, that’s the kind of mood I’m in.  I’m starting things off with the trailer for the evil grindhouse/drive-in movie to end all evil grindhouse/drive-in movies, the original Last House on the Left.  Why?  Because, as the trailer tells us, the road leads to nowhere…

2) Destroy All Monsters (1968)

If I do get out of my present funk, it’ll be due to trailers like this one.  It’s just so goofy! 

3) Cheerleader Camp (1988)

Erin claims that actual cheerleader camp was nothing like the cheerleader camp in this trailer. 

4) The Park Is Mine (1986)

This Canadian action film stars Tommy Lee Jones, who was also apparently in Capt.  America.  Not that I would know.

5) The Undertaker and His Pals (1966)

Believe it or not, I’ve got this one on DVD and this is one of those films that looks a lot more extreme in the trailer than it actually is.  The film itself is a collection of bad performances, juvenile humor, and silly gore effects.  The trailer looks a lot more sick than the actual film, which is why it’s a classic of grindhouse advertising.

6) It’s Alive (1974)

This is yet another trailer from the fertile mind of Larry Cohen.  It’s alive!  What is it?  It can either be your dream or your NIGHTMARE!  Much like me.

A Spawn of 6 More Trailers


 

It’s Saturday and that can only mean that it’s time for 6 more deadly trailers in this latest edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers.

1) Liz (197?)

Oh my God, I cannot begin to put into words how much I love this trailer.  It is just so shameless and obvious in its intentions and it typifies everything I love about grindhouse advertising.  I’ve never seen Liz or, to be honest, even heard of it before I came across this trailer.  However, just from watching the trailer, I get the feeling about a woman named Liz who has sex.

(By the way, did you know that the name Lisa originally started as a shortened version of the name Elizabeth?  So, this is yet another film that appears to be named after me.  I’m not saying that’s necessarily a good thing since it appears to be about a self-destructive nymphomaniac — yes, yes, I know — but I’m just saying.)

2) God Told Me To (1976)

Directed by Larry Cohen, God Told Me To is one of the best sci-fi/horror/urban thriller hybrids of all time.  Unfortunately, I don’t think this trailer quite does it justice but I’m including it here because this is a rare case where I love the movie more than the trailer.

3) Vigilante Force (1976)

They were hired to clean up the town … instead, they cleaned it out!”  Actually, I take that back, my favorite line from this trailer is the one about “loving not wisely…but very well indeed.”

4) Mean Johnny Barrows (1976)

This is yet another 1970s Fred Williamson blaxploitation film.  This one not only features Williamson killing a lot of people but Roddy McDowall and Elliot Gould as well!

5) Blastfighter (1985)

From director Lamberto Bava comes this love story between a man and his gun.

6) The Deadly Spawn (1983)

I actually really love this trailer.  It’s got this likable “We got together one weekend and made a cheap sci-fi film” sort of vibe to it.

 

6 Trailers For Your Oscar Hangover


Now that the Oscars are over with, it’s time for another installment of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Trailers.

1) The Sicilian Connections (1972)

Since we’re coming down off the Oscars, I’ll start this latest edition off with the trailer for The Sicilian Connection, an Italian rip-off of 1971 best picture winner, The French Connection.  I haven’t seen the actual movie but I love the music that plays in the background of this trailer.

2) Dirty Gang (1977)

This is another Italian crime flick.  This trailer is worth it to just see that wonderful credit “Tomas Milian as Trash.”

3) Trouble Man (1972)

Tomas Milian may have been Trash but Robert Hooks was Trouble.

4) Q: The Winged Serpent (1982)

I’m so happy to include this trailer because I think Arleigh will love it.  David Carradine and Richard Roundtree fight a prehistoric something-or-an0ther.  Michael Moriarty’s in this which can only mean that this is a Larry Cohen film.

5) Dawn of the Mummy (1980)

“Egypt…a nice place to visit but would you want to die there?”  Not surprisingly, this is an Italian film that was released in the wake of Dawn of the Dead and Zombi 2.

6) The Crippled Masters (1979)

I kinda feel that this trailer runs a little bit long but then again, I’m not big into Kung Fu films that don’t star Uma Thurman.  Still, this is one of those pure grindhouse trailers that has to be seen to be believed.