Guilty Pleasure No. 17: Girls, Girls, Girls (by Mötley Crüe)

Posted on February 15, 2014 by Arleigh

“Long legs and burgundy lips.”

For some this is the height of hair metal at it’s raunchy. Some even call this song one of the best metal songs out there (though that’s stretching the term metal like it was Plastic-Man). I, for one, call this one of the guiltiest pleasures to come out of the hair metal scene of the 1980’s.

I’ll just let the lyrics speak to the cheesetastic and raunchirific pleasure this song was and remains (especially in strip clubs) to this very day.

Girls, Girls, Girls

Friday night and I need a fight
My motorcycle and a switchblade knife
Handful of grease in my hair feels right
But what I need to make me tight are those

Girls, girls, girls
Long legs and burgundy lips
Girls, girls, girls
Dancin’ down on Sunset Strip
Girls, girls, girls
Red lips, fingertips

Trick or treat, sweet to eat
On Halloween and New Year’s Eve
Yankee girls, you just can’t be beat
But you’re the best when you’re off your feet

Girls, girls, girls
At the Dollhouse in Fort Lauderdale
Girls, girls, girls
Rocking in Atlanta at Tattletails
Girls, girls, girls
Raising hell at the Seventh Veil

Have you read the news
In the Soho Tribune?
Ya know she did me
Well, then she broke my heart

I’m such a good good boy
I just need a new toy
I tell you what, girl
Dance for me
I’ll keep you overemployed
Just tell me a story
You know the one I mean

Crazy Horse, Paris, France
Forgot the names, remember romance
I got the photos, a ménage à trois
Musta broke those French’s laws with those

Girls, girls, girls
At the Body Shop and the Marble Arch
Girls, girls, girls
Tropicana’s where I lost my heart
Girls, girls, girls

Vince: Hey Tommy, check that out, man!
Tommy: What Vince? Where?
Vince: Right there, man! Hey baby, you wanna go somewhere?

Girls, girls, girls
Girls, girls, girls
Girls, girls, girls

Girls, girls, girls

UNCENSORED

Previous Guilty Pleasures:

20 Good Things That I Saw On Television in 2013

Posted on January 4, 2014 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Someday, I want to have my own tv network. I’ll call it Lisa Marie Television (or LMTV for short) and it’ll be like Lifetime but with the Lisa Marie difference. What’s the Lisa Marie difference? Sweetheart, if you have to ask, you’ll never know.

Anyway, as I wait for that day to come, I’m going to continue my series of posts on my favorites of 2013 by telling you about some of the best things that I saw on television over the course of the previous year. Here they are, in random order:

1) The series finale of Breaking Bad

Perfection.

2) The series finale of The Office

After a rough couple of seasons, The Office redeemed itself with a perfect conclusion. How can you do any better than Jim and Pam moving to Texas?

3) Children’s Hospital on Adult Swim

Without a doubt, the funniest 15 minutes on television.

4) Burning Love on E!

E! broadcast episodes of the hilarious, Bachelor-parodying web series in 2013 and gave everyone a chance to follow Julie as she pined for Blaze and asked lucky bachelors, “Will you hold my box?”

5) SyFy Saturdays

This year, my Saturday night ritual was to gather online with the Snarkalecs and watch an original movie on SyFy. And while all of the Normals (as we refer to the rest of the world) were going crazy over Sharknado, the Snarkalecs knew that End of the World was a hundred times better.

6) The only likable team won The Amazing Race 23

I can’t remember their names but I can remember that I liked them more than Tim & Marie, Nicole & Travis, and Leo & Jamal.

7) Bonnie and Clyde

Broadcast on three different networks and over two separate nights, Bonnie and Clyde was big, silly, over-the-top, glamorous, and full of style. It made me want to go out and rob a bank while looking good doing it.

8) Orange is the New Black

We lost a lot of good shows in 2013 but, fortunately, we also gained a few new ones.

9) South Park satirizes Obama and Game of Thrones

I like one of those targets and dislike the other (guess which is which) but the important thing is that both of them have reached a point where they deserve to be satirized. Not surprisingly, South Park continues to be one of the few show to have the guts to ridicule the topics that other shows are too cowardly to touch.

10) Bates Motel

Bates Motel was frequently uneven but it was always worth watching for Vera Farmiga and Max Thieriot.

11) The Space Kitten

That little space kitten that was singing Wrecking Ball at the American Music Awards? Adorable!

12) Jimmy Kimmel

Whether he was causing Kanye West to have a meltdown or posting fake videos on YouTube, 2013 was the year of Kimmel.

13) The Talking Dead

Look, we all know that The Walking Dead is great but, for me, The Talking Dead is usually the highlight of AMC on Sunday night. Chris Hardwick is adorable to begin with but the moment he choked up while discussing the death of Herschel confirmed that he’s not just a host. He’s a true fan as well.

14) Miley Cyrus at the VMAs

It was tacky, it was shocking, it was disturbing, it got people talking and overreacting, and it was everything that television should be. (That said, I would like to point out that — despite what some members of the media seem to believe — twerking existed long before Miley Cyrus decided to make it a part of her act. I was twerking back when Miley was still Hannah Montana.)

15) That episode of Girls with Patrick Wilson

One of the best 25 minutes of television ever, and not just because Patrick Wilson is super hot.

16) The Herstory of Dance and Intro to Felt Surrogacy episodes of Community

Without the guiding vision of Dan Harmon, Community‘s fourth season was undeniably rough. However, these two episodes reminded us that Community still had something to offer. (That said, I’m glad Dan Harmon’s back for season 5…)

17) Colton walks off Survivor …. again

Colton Cumbie is one of the most loathsome people to ever show up on a reality TV show so it was satisfying to see him utterly fail to win Survivor not once but twice.

18) The Big Brother Blog got a new writer named Lisa Marie

This year, Bill Lage asked me to write episode recaps for the Big Brother Blog. Of course, I said yes and, for three months, I had a lot of fun keeping people updated with what all of the loathsome people in the Big Brother house were up to. I made a lot of new friends and I even made a persistent enemy named Maggie Long, a poor little internet troll who just couldn’t handle the fact that I encouraged my readers to “Stay supple!” It was a lot of fun and I look forward to doing it all over again in 2014.

19) Winter Storm Cleon caused the local news people to freak out!

Yes, we did get some snow and ice down here in December. Unlike you folks up North, those of us in Texas only see snow and ice every other year so, whenever it does show up, you can be sure that all of the local newspeople are going to panic. That’s exactly what happened this year and it was fun to watch.

20) Degrassi!

My favorite Canadian show came back!

Tomorrow, we take a look at ten of my favorite books of 2013.

Other Entries In TSL’s Look Back At 2013:

Bleh! 10 Random Thoughts About The 2012 Emmy Nominations

Posted on July 19, 2012 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The 2012 Emmy Nominations were announced this morning and, at the risk of repeating myself, “Bleh!”

I know that I’ve kind of set myself up as the awards-crazy member of the TSL team and that’s a title that I wear proudly. Usually, I love writing up posts about the Oscars and the Emmys and whatever other silly awards might be handed out during any particular week.

But seriously, this year’s Emmy Awards are just making me go, “Bleh,” with boredom.

For the boring list of official nominees, click here.

For the far more interesting list of my personal nominees, click here!

Here’s ten random thoughts that went through my head as I looked over the list of nominees:

1) The best comedy on TV, Community, was totally and completely snubbed with the exception of one writing nomination.

2) The Walking Dead was also snubbed. To be honest, I feel that the Walking Dead’s 2nd season was a bit too uneven to justify it winning but, at the very least, it deserved a nomination.

3) 3o Rock, which hasn’t been interesting for a while, received all sorts of nominations.

4) My three favorite guilty pleasures — Pan Am, The Client List, and Ringer — were completely ignored. I’m not surprised by that but seriously, I was still hoping that the Emmy nominations would be at least a little bit fun.

5) The tyranny of Betty White continues as she was nominated for Outstanding Reality Series Host.

6) I was excited by a few of the nominations: Girls and Veep for Best Comedy Series, Game of Thrones and Boardwalk Empire for best drama series, Claire Danes for best actress in a drama series, Uma Thurman for best guest actress in a drama, and Idris Elba for best actor in a miniseries. Degrassi picked up a nomination as well. Yay!

7) The two most overrated shows on TV, the Colbert Report and The Daily Show, were both nominated for like the 100th time.

8) Both the Office and Dexter were thoroughly snubbed, as they should have been. In the past, I’ve loved both of those shows but this season, they both seemed to take viewer loyalty for granted.

9) Apparently, networks can now pass off their failed shows as being miniseries. That’s the only possible way to explain Ashley Judd picking up a nomination for best actress in a miniseries.

10) With the exception of a nomination for Project Runway, the Lifetime Network was pretty much ignored. When you ignore Lifetime, you pretty much leave me no choice but to ignore you.

Lifetime! My life, my time…

My 2012 Emmy Nominations

Posted on June 14, 2012 by Lisa Marie Bowman

So, for the past few days, I’ve been happily hopping around my section of the Shattered Lens Bunker and do you know why?

Because it’s awards season, that’s why! With the conclusion of the 2011-2012 TV season, Emmy ballots have been mailed and votes are being cast and, come July, we’ll know which shows and performers have been nominated for the 2012 Emmys.

Before that happens, however, I would like to play a little game called “What if Lisa Was Solely Responsible For Picking the Nominees.” Here’s how it works — I looked over and studied the complete list of the shows and performances that have been submitted this year for Emmy consideration. And then, from that list, I picked my personal nominees.

(A complete list of every show and performer that’s been submitted for Emmy consideration can be found here.)

Below are my personal nominations in the major Emmy categories. Again, note that these are not necessarily the shows and performers that I believe will be nominated. Instead, these are the shows and performers that I would nominate if I was solely responsible for picking the nominees.

A complete list of my nominations in every single Emmy category can be found here. (And yes, there’s a lot of Lifetime on the list. There’s also a lot of Community.)

Best Comedy Series

Bored to Death (HBO)

Community (NBC)

Girls (HBO)

It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (FX)

Parks and Recreation (NBC)

Raising Hope (Fox)

Veep (HBO)

Best Drama Series

Boardwalk Empire (HBO)

Breaking Bad (AMC)

The Client List (Lifetime)

Downton Abbey (PBS)

Game of Thrones (HBO)

Homeland (Showtime)

Pan Am (ABC)

Ringer (The CW)

True Blood (HBO)

The Walking Dead (AMC)

Outstanding Miniseries or Movie

Blue-Eyed Butcher (Lifetime)

Cyberbully (ABC Family)

Drew Peterson: Untouchable (Lifetime)

Five (Lifetime)

Girl Fight (Lifetime)

Hatfields & McCoys (History Channel)

The Hour (BBC America)

Of Two Minds (Lifetime)

Outstanding Variety Series

Conan (TBS)

Fashion Police (E)

Key and Peele (Comedy Central)

The Soup (E)

Tosh .O (Comedy Central)

Outstanding Variety Special

Betty White’s 90th Birthday Party (NBC)

Celtic Women: Believe (PBS)

The Comedy Central Roast of Charlie Sheen (Comedy Central)

TV Land Awards (TV Land)

Wendy Liebman: Taller on TV (Showtime)

Outstanding Nonfiction Special

Bobby Fischer Against The World (HBO)

Catholicism: Amazed and Afraid (PBS)

Crime After Crime (OWN)

God Is The Bigger Elvis (HBO)

6 Days To Air: The Making of South Park (Comedy Central)

Outstanding Nonfiction Series

America in Primetime (PBS)

American Masters (PBS)

America’s Most Wanted (Lifetime)

Beyond Scared Straight (A&E)

Inside Story (Biography)

Outstanding Reality Program

Antiques Roadshow (PBS)

Dance Moms (Lifetime)

Kitchen Nightmares (Fox)

Scouted (E)

Storage Wars (A&E)

Outstanding Reality-Competition Program

The Amazing Race (CBS)

The Bachelor (ABC)

Big Brother (CBS)

The Celebrity Apprentice (NBC)

Hell’s Kitchen (Fox)

Project Runway (Lifetime)

So You Think You Can Dance (Fox)

Survivor (CBS)

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Comedy Series

Larry David in Curb Your Enthusiasm (HBO)

Johnny Galecki in The Big Bang Theory (CBS)

Danny McBride in Eastbound and Down (HBO)

Joel McHale in Community (NBC)

Lucas Neff in Raising Hope (Fox)

Jason Schwartzman in Bored To Death (HBO)

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Drama

Steve Buscemi in Boardwalk Empire (HBO)

Bryan Cranston in Breaking Bad (AMC)

Jeffrey Donavon in Burn Notice (USA)

Damian Lewis in Homeland (Showtime)

Andrew Lincoln in The Walking Dead (AMC)

Timothy Olyphant in Justified (FX)

Outstanding Lead Actor In A Miniseries or Movie

Idris Elba in Luther (BBC America)

Rob Lowe in Drew Peterson: Untouchable (Lifetime)

Steven Weber in Duke (Hallmark Movie Channel)

Dominic West in The Hour (BBC America)

Ben Whishaw in The Hour (BBC America)

Outstanding Lead Actress In A Comedy

Zooey Deschanel in New Girl (Fox)

Lena Dunham in Girls (HBO)

Tina Fey in 30 Rock (NBC)

Julia Louis Dreyfuss in Veep (HBO)

Mary-Louis Parker in Weeds (Showtime)

Martha Plimpton in Raising Hope (Fox)

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama

Claire Danes in Homeland (Showtime)

Sarah Michelle Gellar in Ringer (The CW)

Jennifer Love Hewitt in The Client List (Lifetime)

Julianna Margulies in The Good Wife (CBS)

Elizabeth McGovern in Downton Abbey (PBS)

Anna Paquin in True Blood (HBO)

Outstanding Lead Actress In A Miniseries or Movie

Kristin Davis in Of Two Minds (Lifetime)

Anne Heche in Girl Fight (Lifetime)

Rose McGowan in The Pastor’s Wife (Lifetime)

Emily Osment in Cyberbully (ABC Family)

Sara Paxton in Blue Eyed Butcher (Lifetime)

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Comedy Series

Charlie Day in It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX)

Danny DeVito in It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (FX)

Donald Glover in Community (NBC)

Nick Offerman in Parks and Recreation (NBC)

Danny Pudi in Community (NBC)

Matt Walsh in Veep (HBO)

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Drama

Bruce Campbell in Burn Notice (USA)

Peter Dinklage in Game of Thrones (HBO)

Giancarlo Espositto in Breaking Bad (AMC)

Michael Pitt in Boardwalk Empire (HBO)

Michael Shannon in Boardwalk Empire (HBO)

Alexander Skarsgard in True Blood (HBO)

Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Miniseries or Movie

Powers Boothe in Hatfields and McCoys (History Channel)

Justin Bruening in Blue-Eyed Butcher (Lifetime)

Mark-Paul Gosselaar in Hide (TNT)

Sir Roger Moore in A Princess For Christmas (Hallmark Movie Channel)

Tony Shalhoub in Five (Lifetime)

Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Comedy

Alison Brie in Community (NBC)

Kristen Chenoweth in GCB (ABC)

Anna Chlumsky in Veep (HBO)

Gillian Jacobs in Community (NBC)

Cloris Leachman in Raising Hope (Fox)

Aubrey Plaza in Parks and Recreation (NBC)

Outstanding Supporting Actress in Drama

Christine Baranski in The Good Wife (CBS)

Kristen Bauer Von Straten in True Blood (HBO)

Kelly MacDonald in Boardwalk Empire (HBO)

Christina Ricci in Pan Am (ABC)

Sophia Turner in Game of Thrones (HBO)

Deborah Ann Woll in True Blood (HBO)

Supporting Actress In A Miniseries or Movie

Tammy Blanchard in Of Two Minds (Lifetime)

Kaley Cuoco in Drew Peterson: Untouchable (Lifetime)

Lisa Edelstein in Blue-Eyed Butcher (Lifetime)

Jessica Lange in American Horror Story (FX)

Jena Malone in Hatfields and McCoy (History Channel)

Through the Shattered Lens

Where mainstream meets grindhouse, exploitation, otaku and gamers

Tag Archives: Girls

Guilty Pleasure No. 17: Girls, Girls, Girls (by Mötley Crüe)

20 Good Things That I Saw On Television in 2013

Bleh! 10 Random Thoughts About The 2012 Emmy Nominations

My 2012 Emmy Nominations