2017 in Review: Lisa Marie’s Picks For the 16 Worst Films of 2017!

Posted on January 8, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Well, it’s the second week of January and that means that it’s time for me to now to announce my picks for the best and worst of the previous year! Let’s start things out with my picks for the 16 worst films of 2017!

(Why 16? Because Lisa doesn’t do odd numbers.)

(Also be sure to check out my picks for 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011, and 2010!)

16. Fifty Shades Darker,

15. Snatched,

14. King Arthur: Legend of the Sword,

13. Transformers: The Last Knight,

12. The Glass Castle,

11. Beatriz at Dinner,

10. Alien: Covenant,

9. Rings,

8. The Last Word,

7. The Circle,

6. Fist Fight,

5. All Eyez On Me,

4. To The Bone,

3. The Emoji Movie,

2. The Book of Henry,

And the worst film of 2017 was…

Wolves at the Door

Tomorrow, my look back at 2017 continues with my picks for the greatest moments for the best and most important television show of 2017, Twin Peaks: The Return!

Previous entries in the TSL’s Look Back at 2017:

Playing Catch-Up With The Films of 2017: The Book of Henry (dir by Colin Trevorrow)

Posted on December 25, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

In the movies, child geniuses inevitably turn out to be little creeps at that’s certainly the case with The Book of Henry.

Henry (Jaeden Lieberher) is an 11 year-old with an exceptional IQ, which essentially means that it’s supposed to be cute when he talks down to people and treats them like shit. In fact, Henry is such a genius that he’s managed to make a lot of money on the stock market and he also invents stuff. He practically raises his younger brother, Peter (Jacob Tremblay, who is as authentic as Lieberher is overbaked). He also takes care of his mom, Susan (Naomi Watts). Susan’s a waitress because it’s a rule of movies like this that the single parent of a child genius will always either be a waitress or a physicist. There’s really no middle ground. Anyway, Susan appears to be destined to be forever single but she says that’s okay because Henry is the only man she needs in her life.

(Cringe)

Anyway, Henry lives next door to the Sickleman family. You know that’s going to be a problem because, in the movies, good people never have names like Sickleman. Glenn Sickleman (Dean Norris) is not only the police commissioner but he’s also not a very good neighbor. He’s the type of neighbor who complains if the leaves from your tree gets in his yard. He’s also not really comfortable living next door to a child genius. It’s probably because Henry is kind of a condescending jerk.

Henry suspects that Glenn is abusing his stepdaughter, Christina (Maddie Ziegler, who is best known for Dance Moms). However, before Henry can do anything about it, he has a seizure dies. Uh-oh, turns out that Henry had a brain tumor! A genius killed by his own brain. So. Much. Irony.

However, before he died, he left behind a book and recorded instructions for Susan. It turns out that Henry knew he was going to die because Henry was a super genius who could see the future. (At least, I assume that’s what happened.) So, he decided that his mother should murder Glenn and he even came up with some helpful instructions for how she could do it and not get caught.

Now, let me ask you a question. If you discovered that your recently deceased son spent the last few days of his life plotting how to murder his neighbor would you…

a) Destroy all the evidence and pretend you never saw it

b) Shrug and decide to grant his last wish by following his instructions and killing the neighbor?

I mean, let’s think about this. By all evidence, it would appear that Henry was a sociopath. Even if you accept the idea that he had to kill Glenn to save Christina, you still also have to accept the idea that he coldly and methodically plotted out the perfect way to commit a murder and then, realizing he was going to die, he decided that his mom should commit the murder instead.

This is the type of material that a director like David Fincher, Michael Haneke or Lars Von Trier could have a lot of fun with. However, The Book of Henry was directed by Colin Trevorrow and he takes this weird sentimental approach to the material. Instead of freaking out over having raised a sociopath, Susan immediately starts to follow all of his instructions. What’s amazing is that, even in the recording he made for his mom to listen to after his death, Henry is still a condescending little jerk. At one point, from beyond the grave, Henry directs his mom to take a right turn. Then he adds, “No, your other right.”

But what really gets me about this movie is that, after all the build up, Henry’s big genius plan is for Susan to get a rifle and shoot Glenn. That’s it. I mean, anyone could have thought of that! If you’re going to make a movie like this, at least have Henry come up with some big complicated scheme! At least give us that! I mean, honestly, Susan could have come up with Henry’s plan on her own.

Does Susan follow through with the plan? I’m not going to tell you. But I will tell you that the film’s climax features a school talent show. Maddie Ziegler gets to dance. Jacob Tremblay gets to perform a magic trick. They’re both really talented. Sparkle Motion does not perform and that’s a shame. Sometimes, I doubt Colin Trevorrow’s commitment to Sparkle Motion.

Anyway, to say that The Book of Henry is a bad film doesn’t quite do justice to just how ill-conceived this film really is. Someone decided to make a heartwarming and rather humorless film about a child ordering his mother to commit a murder. You may think it’s a parody at first but no, it’s a real movie. It’s The Book of Henry.

Here Are the 70 Songs That Are Eligible For Best Original Song of 2017!

Posted on December 18, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Today, the Academy announced the 70 songs that will be eligible to be nominated for best original song! So, if you’re putting down bets and making out your predictions, here are your best song possibilities:

“U.N.I (You And I)” from “And the Winner Isn’t”
“Love And Lies” from “Band Aid”
“If I Dare” from “Battle of the Sexes”
“Evermore” from “Beauty and the Beast”
“How Does A Moment Last Forever” from “Beauty and the Beast”
“Now Or Never” from “Bloodline: Now or Never”
“She” from “Bombshell: The Hedy Lamarr Story”
“Your Hand I Will Never Let It Go” from “The Book of Henry”
“Buddy’s Business” from “Brawl in Cell Block 99”
“The Crown Sleeps” from “The Breadwinner”
“World Gone Mad” from “Bright”
“Mystery Of Love” from “Call Me by Your Name”
“Visions Of Gideon” from “Call Me by Your Name”
“Captain Underpants Theme Song” from “Captain Underpants The First Epic Movie”
“Ride” from “Cars 3”
“Run That Race” from “Cars 3”
“Tell Me How Long” from “Chasing Coral”
“Broken Wings” from “City of Ghosts”
“Remember Me” from “Coco”
“Prayers For This World” from “Cries from Syria”
“There’s Something Special” from “Despicable Me 3”
“It Ain’t Fair” from “Detroit”
“A Little Change In The Weather” from “Downsizing”
“Stars In My Eyes (Theme From Drawing Home)” from “Drawing Home”
“All In My Head” from “Elizabeth Blue”
“Dying For Ya” from “Elizabeth Blue”
“Green” from “Elizabeth Blue”
“Can’t Hold Out On Love” from “Father Figures”
“Home” from “Ferdinand”
“I Don’t Wanna Live Forever” from “Fifty Shades Darker”
“You Shouldn’t Look At Me That Way” from “Film Stars Don’t Die in Liverpool”
“This Is How You Walk On” from “Gifted”
“Summer Storm” from “The Glass Castle”
“The Pure And The Damned” from “Good Time”
“This Is Me” from “The Greatest Showman”
“The Hero” from “The Hero”
“How Shall A Sparrow Fly” from “Hostiles”
“Just Getting Started” from “If You’re Not in the Obit, Eat Breakfast”
“Truth To Power” from “An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power”
“Next Stop, The Stars” from “Kepler’s Dream”
“The Devil & The Huntsman” from “King Arthur: Legend of the Sword”
“Have You Ever Wondered” from “Lake of Fire”
“I’ll Be Gone” from “Lake of Fire”
“We’ll Party All Night” from “Lake of Fire”
“Friends Are Family” from “The Lego Batman Movie”
“Found My Place” from “The Lego Ninjago Movie”
“Stand Up For Something” from “Marshall”
“Rain” from “Mary and the Witch’s Flower”
“Myron/Byron” from “The Meyerowitz Stories (New and Selected)”
“Longing For Summer” from “Moomins and the Winter Wonderland”
“Mighty River” from “Mudbound”
“Never Forget” from “Murder on the Orient Express”
“Hold The Light” from “Only the Brave”
“PBNJ” from “Patti Cake$”
“Tuff Love (Finale)” from “Patti Cake$”
“Lost Souls” from “The Pirates of Somalia”
“How A Heart Unbreaks” from “Pitch Perfect 3”
“The Promise” from “The Promise”
“Kaadanayum Kaalchilambe” from “Pulimurugan”
“Maanathe Maarikurumbe” from “Pulimurugan”
“Stubborn Angel” from “Same Kind of Different as Me”
“Dancing Through The Wreckage” from “Served Like a Girl”
“Keep Your Eyes On Me” from “The Shack”
“On The Music Goes” from “Slipaway”
“The Star” from “The Star”
“Jump” from “Step”
“Tickling Giants” from “Tickling Giants”
“Fly Away” from “Trafficked”
“Speak To Me” from “Voice from the Stone”
“Walk On Faith” from “Year by the Sea”

The Academy also announced that 141 films will be eligible for Best Original Score. In the interest of space, I’m not going to post them all here. You can check out the list on Awards Watch!

Watch The Trailer For The Book of Henry!

Posted on March 30, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

The thing I like about this trailer is that it starts out looking like the type of cutesy bullshit that I usually hate (just check out my review of Pay It Forward) and then suddenly, it gets all weird and twisted and stuff.

Naomi Watts and Jacob Tremblay star in The Book of Henry, which is due to released in June. Most films released in June suck but hopefully, The Book of Henry will be an exception.

(By the way, if the bald guy is actually abusing his daughter, I’ll be disappointed. This film will work far better if Henry really is just a manipulative little sociopath.)

Lisa’s Way Too Early Oscar Predictions For January

Posted on January 1, 2017 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Why are these Oscar predictions “way too early?”

Well, unlike every other movie blogger right now, I am not attempting to predict who and what will be nominated on January 24th. Instead, with this post, I am attempting to predict which 2017 releases will be nominated next year! In short, I am attempting to predict what movies and which performers will emerge as Oscar contenders over the next 12 months.

Needless to say, this is more than a little bit foolish on my part. I haven’t seen any of the films listed below. Some of these films don’t have release dates and others are coming out so early in the year that, in order to be contenders, they’ll have to be so spectacular that neither the Academy nor the critics end up forgetting about them. For the most part, the true picture of the Oscar race usually doesn’t start to emerge until the summer.

For now, these predictions are, for the most part, wild guesses and they should be taken with more than just a grain of salt. Each month, I will revise my predictions. At the very least, next year, we’ll probably be able to look back at this post and laugh.

(Whenever trying to make early Oscar predictions, one should remember all of the award bloggers who predicted Nicole Kidman would win an Oscar for Grace of Monaco, just to then see the movie make its long-delayed premiere on Lifetime.)

With all that in mind, here are my way too early Oscar predictions for January!

Best Picture

All Eyez on Me

Battle of the Sexes

The Beguiled

Blade Runner 2047

Crown Heights

Darkest Hour

Downsizing

Dunkirk

T2: Trainspotting

War Machine

Again, for the most part, these predictions are a combination of wild guesses, instinct, and wishful thinking. It’s entirely possible that none of these films will actually be nominated for best picture. (Some might even end up premiering on Lifetime, you never know.) Here’s why I think that some of them might be remembered next year at this time:

All Eyez On Me is a biopic of Tupac Shakur. Assuming the film is done correctly, Shakur’s life would seem to have all the elements that usually go into an Oscar-winning film.

Battle of the Sexes is a film based on a true incident, a 1970s tennis match between a feminist and a self-declared male chauvinist. It’s directed by the team behind the Oscar-nominated Little Miss Sunshine and it stars two former nominees, Emma Stone and Steve Carell.

The Beguiled might be wishful thinking on my part but, at this point, wishful thinking is all I have to go on for most of these predictions. The Beguiled is a remake of a Clint Eastwood film and it’s directed by one of my favorite directors, Sofia Coppola! Much like Battle of the Sexes, its misogynist-gets-what’s-coming-to-him storyline might make it the perfect film for the first year of the Trump presidency.

Blade Runner 2047 is one of the most eagerly anticipated films of 2017 and it’s directed by Denis Villeneuve, who is hot off of Arrival. The Oscar success of Mad Max: Fury Road proved that a sequel can be a contender.

Every year, at least one contender emerges out of Sundance and this year, it could very well be Crown Heights. It tells a fact-based story, about a man trying to win his best friend’s release from prison after the latter is wrongly convicted. That all sounds very Oscar baity.

Speaking of Oscar bait, Darkest Hour stars Gary Oldman as Winston Churchill. If that doesn’t sound like Oscar bait, I don’t know what does.

Downsizing is Alexander Payne’s latest film. It’s about a man (Matt Damon), who shrinks himself. It may not sound like typical Oscar bait but Payne is definitely a favorite of the Academy’s.

Dunkirk is Christopher Nolan’s big epic for 2017. Will it be another huge success or will it just be bombastic? We’ll see. The Academy has a weakness for World War II films and it could be argued that the very successful yet never nominated Nolan is overdue for some Academy recognition. (It is true that Inception received a nomination for best picture but Nolan himself was snubbed.)

T2: Trainspotting is probably coming out too early in the year to be a legitimate contender but who knows? The trailer was great. Danny Boyle is directing it. And, much as with Blade Runner 2047, Mad Max: Fury Road proved that a well-made and intelligent sequel can find favor with the Academy.

War Machine is described as being a satire about the war in Afghanistan. Could it be another Big Short? With Obama out of office, the Academy might be more open to political satire than they’ve been in the past.

Best Director

Danny Boyle for T2: Trainspotting

Sofia Coppola for The Beguiled

Christopher Nolan for Dunkirk

Alexander Payne for Downsizing

Denis Villeneuve for Blade Runner 2047

Again, there’s a lot of random guessing here. Personally, I’d love to see Sofia Coppola receive a second nomination for best director. Payne and Boyle are always possibilities and, if Villeneuve’s work on Arrival is ignored this year, nominating him for Blade Runner would be a good way to make up for it. As for Nolan, he’s going to get nominated some day. Why not for Dunkirk?

Best Actor

Tom Cruise in American Made

Sam Elliott in The Hero

Hugh Jackman in The Greatest Showman

Logan Lerman in Sidney Hall

Gary Oldman in Darkest Hour

In American Made, Tom Cruise plays a real-life drug runner. It sounds like one of those change-of-pace roles that often results in an Oscar nomination. Gary Oldman has never won an Oscar and has only been nominated once. The Academy might want to rectify that situation by nominating him for playing Winston Churchill. And finally, Hugh Jackman as P.T. Barnum in a big budget musical that’s scheduled to open on Christmas Day? It sounds like either a total disaster or the formula for Oscar gold!

Logan Lerman is one of those actors who appears to be destined to eventually be nominated for an Oscar and, in Sidney Hall, he ages over thirty years. Finally, Sam Elliott is a beloved veteran who has never been nominated. If The Hero is a hit at Sundance, it’s easy to imagine the Oscar campaign that will follow.

Best Actress

Jessica Chastain in The Zookeeper’s Wife

Judi Dench in Victoria and Abdul

Nicole Kidman in The Beguiled

Emma Stone in Battle of the Sexes

Naomi Watts in The Book of Henry

As of this writing, Meryl Streep does not have a movie scheduled to be released in 2017, which means that another actress will get the sport usually reserved for her. But who? Jessica Chastain could be nominated because she’s Jessica Chastain and the Academy loves her. Judi Dench plays Queen Victoria for a second time in Victoria and Abdul. The Academy loves movies about British royalty and Dench has already been nominated once for bringing Victoria to life. Naomi Watts plays a loving but possibly crazy mother in The Book of Henry, which again sounds like a very Oscar baity role. If Emma Stone doesn’t win for La La Land, the Academy could make it up to her by nominating her for Battle of the Sexes.

As for Nicole Kidman in The Beguiled — well, let’s call that wishful thinking. My hope is that Sofia Coppola will do great things with The Beguiled and she will get another great performance out of Nicole Kidman. We’ll see if I’m right.

Best Supporting Actor

Robert Carlyle in T2: Trainspotting

Johnny Depp in Murder on The Orient Experss

James Franco in The Masterpiece

Bill Skarsgard in It

Kevin Spacey in Billionaire Boys Club

Admittedly, the guesses here are fairly random but there is a logic behind each nominee. Robert Carlyle was great in Trainspotting so he might be just as great in T2. In Billionaire Boys Club, Kevin Spacey plays a sleazy con artist and that sounds like the type of role with which he could do wonders. If It is to be a success, Bill Skarsgard is going to have to be a terrifying Pennywise. If Heath Ledger could win for playing the Joker, surely Skarsgard could be nominated for playing Pennywise.

As for James Franco in The Masterpiece … yes, it’s more wishful thinking on my part. Franco will be playing Tommy Wiseau, the director of the notorious The Room. Wiseau is, needless to say, an eccentric figure. Not only do I think James Franco could give an award-worthy performance in the role but I also just like the idea of someone getting an Oscar for playing Tommy Wiseau.

Finally, we have Johnny Depp in Murder on The Orient Express. Why not? It seems like someone from that film’s huge cast is destined to be nominated so why not Johnny Depp?

Best Supporting Actress

Jennifer Aniston in The Yellow Birds

Danai Guirra in All Eyez On Me

Kelly MacDonald in T2: Trainspotting

Kristin Scott Thomas in Darkest Hour

Tilda Swinton in War Machine

These guesses are even more random than my guesses for supporting actor. Jennifer Aniston and Danai Guirra will both be playing mothers who lose their sons. A lot of people were surprised when Aniston was not nominated for Cake so here’s a chance for the Academy to make it up to her. As for Kristin Scott Thomas, she’ll be playing Winston Churchill’s wife and the Academy loves historical wives (i.e., Helena Bonham Carter in The King’s Speech and Felicity Jones in The Theory of Everything).

As for the last two predictions, Tilda Swinton is listed because she’s Tilda Swinton. Kelly MacDonald is listed for the same reason that I put Robert Carlyle down for supporting actor. She was just so good in the first film.

So, there you go! Those are my too early Oscar predictions for January! Will they prove to be accurate? Probably not.

But we’ll see how things change over the next couple of months. At the very least, you’ll be able to look back at this post and laugh at me for thinking that … oh, let’s say Battle of the Sexes … would ever be nominated for an Academy Award.

As for me, I’ll be revising my predictions in February. At least by that point, maybe the Sundance Film Festival will have provided some guidance…