Music Video of the Day: Mission Impossible, performed by Tomoyasu Hotei (2016, dir by ????)

Posted on March 27, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, my sisters and I watched and very much enjoyed Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning. In honor of those 3 hours of sisterly bonding, here is the great Tomoyasu Hotei performing the Mission Impossible theme song.

Enjoy!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Baywatch Nights 1.19 “Epilogue”

Posted on March 26, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Baywatch Nights, a detective show that ran in Syndication from 1995 to 1997. The entire show is currently streaming on You tube!

This week, Griff gets a storyline! Who? Oh yeah, Griff! He’s like the photographer who hangs out at the detective agency sometimes. He was played by Eddie Cibrian and he was listed in the opening credits so I guess he was supposed to be a major character, despite never doing or even saying anything.

Anyway, on to this week’s episode….

Episode 1.19 “Epilogue”

(Dir by Reza Badiyi, originally aired on April 27th, 1996)

Griff is concerned about his old friends, RJ (Jared Murphy) and Rene O’Gill (Julianne Morrs). Their mother has just recently died and Rene suspects that she was murdered by their stepfather, Robert Houston (Ben Murphy). RJ, meanwhile, is a junky for both adrenaline and amphetamines and his girlfriend, Candy (Carmen Electra), seems like she might be a bad influence. Both RJ and Rene are due to receive a good deal of money from their trust funds and, if anything happened to them, that money would go to Robert.

Wanting to learn the truth about her mother’s death, Rene hires Mitch and Ryan to investigate. Because Mitch is a terrible private eye, he decides to have Donna go undercover to discover if Robert is hiding anything. Keep in mind that Donna does not work for the detective agency, has got a club to run, is already training to become a lifeguard, and has absolutely no investigative experience. And, of course, it turns out that there really wasn’t any need to have Donna go undercover because, just as Mitch is terrible at investigating stuff, Robert is terrible at covering up the fact that he’s a murderer.

How does Mitch solve this case? When he discovers that someone has been calling Rene’s answering machine and getting her messages without her knowledge, Mitch says, “Dial Star 69.” That’s the extent of Mitch’s detective work in this episode.

(Answering machines and Star 69, could this show be any more of a product of the 90s?)

The main problem here is that the episode revolves around Griff and his romantic feelings for Rene but since Griff is a character who has only appeared in a handful of episodes and never really made much of an impression, it’s hard to really get either emotionally or mentally involved with his story. When RJ is killed during a jet ski race, Griff gets upset and blames Robert but again, we don’t know Griff, we don’t know RJ, and we don’t know Robert.

The best that can be said about this episode is that it features some fun flirtation between David Hasselhoff and Angie Harmon, though not nearly enough. Probably the most interesting thing about this episode is that it tries to be noticeably more racy than previous episodes and the editing often feels so abrupt that it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that there was a more explicit version of the episode made for Europe. Carmen Electra plays a femme fatale here and she does do a good job of being playfully evil. Later, she would join the cast of regular Baywatch, playing a different character who didn’t murder anyone.

Next week …. oh, who knows? I just want to get to the second season already. That’s when all the aliens and undead Vikings start to show up.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 4.18 “The Searcher/The Way We Weren’t”

Posted on March 26, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Almost the entire show is currently streaming on Daily Motion.

Oh my God, this week’s episode….

Episode 4.18 “The Searcher/The Way We Weren’t”

(Dir by Leslie H. Martinson, originally aired on March 7th, 1981)

This week’s episode was just silly and it’s going to be a struggle to even come up with the usual 500 words to say about it.

Fred Cooper (Jerry Van Dyke) is worried that married life is losing its spark so he wants to relive the early days of his marriage to Dottie (Laraine Stephens). After going through a magic time travel cloud, Fred and Dottie find themselves living in their old house, which they share with Fred’s aunt. Their neighbors are Vic (Jack Carter) and Myra Fletcher (Dawn Wells). Vic is Fred’s boss. He and Myra are also swingers! Apparently, Fred forgot about that but I have to wonder how anyone would forget that? Anyway, Vic offers Fred a promotion but only if Fred will allow Vic to sleep with Dottie. Fred responds by punching Vic out while Vic is hosting a Swingers Convention on Fantasy Island. (Tattoo must have been very happy this week.) Vic realizes that he was in the wrong and Fred still gets his promotion. But is it a real promotion or just a fantasy promotion? Seriously, what the Hell is going on here?

Meanwhile, young heiress Karen Saunders-Holmes (Laurette Spang) comes to the island with her husband, Brian (James Darren). Brian thinks that they’re just on their honeymoon but Karen actually has a fantasy. She wants to be reunited with her father, a man named Noah who supposedly abandoned her when she was an infant and whom she has never met. Mr. Roarke arranges for Noah (Paul Burke) to be released from prison for the weekend and….

PRISON!? Yep, Noah is a convicted murderer and has spent the last two decades in a prison camp. Noah claims that he was innocent of the crime. Anyway, Mr. Roarke introduces Noah to Karen and Brian and says that Noah will be their guide on the Island….

Brian freaks out! It turns out that Brian is actually the man who Noah was framed for murdering. Brian went off and got plastic surgery after faking his own murder, which is why Noah doesn’t recognize him. But Noah soon learns the truth when Brian tricks him into entering a bog of quicksand!

Does Noah survive the quicksand? He does but we’re never told how. Does Brian then freak out and run into the quicksand as well? Of course. Fantasy Island is such a dangerous place!

This was a silly episode. Brian apparently not only had plastic surgery to change his face but also to reduce his age because there was no way he was old enough to a contemporary of Noah’s. And for the swinger’s convention on Fantasy Island …. I mean, what? Mr. Roarke is suddenly okay with a big key party on his Island? How do you forget that you used to live next door to a swinging couple? Like I said, this was just silly. One fantasy features Jerry Van Dyke being way too goofy and the other features James Darren being way to obviously sinister. Neither worked.

So far, the fourth season has really been a mixed bag, hasn’t it? Hopefully, things will improve next week.

Music Video of the Day: Run Your Mouth by The Marias (2024, dir by Bethany Vargas)

Posted on March 26, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s late and I have to be up early tomorrow so I’m just going to let you know that today’s music video of the day is from The Marias, a band featuring lead singer Maria Zardoya and her partner, drummer Josh Conway. I always like the fact that the entire band is like, “We are all Maria’s,” as opposed to doing something like, “Maria and The Three Notes” or something.

Enjoy!

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 1.19 “Crash Diet”

Posted on March 25, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee!

This week, Ponch gets to be a hero! Take that, Baker!

Episode 1.19 “Crash Diet”

(Dir by Don McDougall, originally aired on February 23rd, 1978)

There’s a madman on the freeway and his name is Leonard!

Leonard (Herman Poppe) is a veteran who suffered a traumatic brain injury while serving in Vietnam. He returned home and was making good progress until his wife was killed in a car accident. (Leonard was the one driving.) Leonard now hates cars and, after running away from both his sister’s house and the VA hospital, Leonard sets up camp off the highway. Occasionally, he’ll jump out of the shadows and throw dirt at a motorist. Leonard isn’t trying to hurt anyone but those big clumps of dirt take people by surprise. When he throws a clump of dirt at Ponch, the cops get involved.

Ponch makes it his mission to find Leonard and help him get the help that he needs. And, for once, Ponch manages to do just that. Yay Ponch! Yet, it seems odd that Baker would not be more involved with this case, as it has previously been established that Baker is also a vet and that he also served in Vietnam. One would think that Baker would be somewhat invested in helping Leonard but, in this episode, Baker is mostly along for the ride.

Maybe Baker is preoccupied with the nude volleyball team that he met at the start of the episode. When he and Ponch pulled over a van to give the driver a ticket, they were shocked to discover that the van was full of naked women. It turns out that the local naturalist community has their own volleyball league and the women are all players. Later, Baker and Ponch come across the now-clothed women playing in the park. Ponch and Baker play a game and totally get their asses kicked. That was satisfying to watch.

Meanwhile, Division wants each precinct to lost a total of 1,000 pounds by the end of the week. (It’s like the Weight Loss episode of The Office.) Officer Grossman (Paul Linke) worries that he won’t be able to lose 18 pounds in time. Baker and Ponch each agree to lose an extra five pounds so Grossman will only have to lose 8. Awwww! Then they pull a prank that makes Getraer think that he’s gained 10 pounds. That was kind of mean but I guess Getraer deserved it for …. for what? Trying to make everyone eat healthy and take care of their bodies?

This episode was a mixed bag. The show’s trademark chases were pretty lackluster this week. But I thought Leonard’s story was well-handled, well-intentioned, and sensitively acted. (Yes, even by Erik Estrada.) As well, Paul Linke had some funny moments as Grossman. This episode may not have been CHiPs at its best but it was still an entertaining 40 minutes.

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us For The Firm!

Posted on March 25, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasionally Mastodon. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie ! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be 1989’s The Firm! I picked it so you know it’ll be good.

It should make for a night of fun viewing and I invite all of you to join in. If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto Mastodon, find the link to the playlist under my account, hit play at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag! The live tweet community is a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.7 “Junk Love”

Posted on March 25, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989. The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, Sonny and Rico somehow still manage to work undercover.

Episode 2.7 “Junk Love”

(Dir by Michael O’Herlihy, originally aired on November 8th, 1985)

“What’s a four letter word for dirt?” Switek asks, while on a stakeout.

“Mud,” Zito offers before correcting himself, “I mean …. sand!”

However, according to Switek, the correct answer is Vice!

And indeed, there’s a lot of dirt to be found in this week’s rather sordid episode of Miami Vice. A raid on a brothel leads the Vice Squad to arrest a notorious smuggler and pimp named Ivory Jones (legendary Jazz musician, Miles Davis) and one of Ivory’s girls, a strung-out junkie named Rosella (Ely Pouget). When they find out that Rosella is apparently the girlfriend of a notorious dealer named Juan Carlos Silva (Jose Perez), they decide to use her and Ivory to take Silva down. While Tubbs is convinced that Rosella will say anything get her next fix, Crockett is convinced that Rosella is someone who truly wants to change her life. Hmmm …. isn’t Crockett usually the cynical one?

Silva is sexually obsessed with Rosella, to the extent that he’ll even kill the members of his own organization if he thinks they’re interested in her. The episode’s twist comes towards the end, when Gina does some research and discovers that Silva is not only Rosella’s lover but also her …. ick! …. father! Ewwwww! As with so many episodes of Miami Vice, Junk Love ends with Sonny watching helplessly as a victimized woman throws away her freedom so that she can shoot her tormenter. Miami Vice was a show that always managed to be downbeat, even when the bad guys met a deserved end.

This episode felt like an attempt to recreate the emotional drama of the season one episode that featured Bruce Willis as an arms dealer with an abused wife. Both episodes even feature the same basic ending, just with the setting moved from the courthouse steps to a yacht. Unfortunately, this episode doesn’t work anywhere half as well as any of the episodes that aired during the first season. Jose Perez may be playing an evil character but he simply does not have an intimidating enough screen presence to be convincing in the role. Miles Davis, meanwhile, delivers his lines convincingly enough but his character disappears in such a way that it almost feels as if he left the set before all of his scenes were filmed.

The main thing that I found myself thinking about, as I watched this episode, was how could Sonny Crockett and Rico Tubbs still convincingly go undercover after two years of busting drug kingpin after drug kingpin. You would think the entire Miami underworld would be on the lookout for them. Instead, Sonny is still somehow convincing everyone that he’s actually “Sonny Burnett,” aspiring drug dealer. I’m starting to think the criminals in Miami might not be that smart.

Music Vide of the Day: Cheerleader by Porter Robinson (2024, dir by Hugh Mulhern)

Posted on March 25, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Enjoy!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi Junior High 2.10 “Censored”

Posted on March 24, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi Junior High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1987 to 1989! The series can be streamed on YouTube!

This week, Degrassi tackles freedom of the press and freedom of lockers.

Episode 2.10 “Censored”

(Dir by Mike Douglas, originally aired on March 7th, 1988)

The inside of Joey’s locker is covered with pin-ups. When L.D. and Alexa walk by and see Joey, Wheels, and Snake rating the pin-ups, L.D. is offended while Alexa is amused. (Alexa, I have to admit, has become the character to whom I relate on this show.) When Joey the announces that he would only rate L.D. “a four,” L.D. responds by covering the inside of her locker with pictures of half-naked men. L.D. then goes to the principal to complain about Joey’s pin-ups. When Joey gets in trouble, he complains about L.D.’s locker. In the end, both Joey and L.D. end up in school suspension together. Awwwwww!

However, that’s not the only case of censorship in this episode! When Caitlin overhears the principal talking to two parents who want Spike to be forbidden to attend school until she gives birth, Caitlin decides to use the power of the press. She writes an editorial called “Keep Spike At Degrassi,” in which she announces that everyone knows that Spike is pregnant and that Spike should be allowed to continue to go to class. Everyone who reads it says that it’s the best thing that Caitlin has even written but Mr. Radish, the faculty advisor to the school newspaper, announces that it is a violation of school policy and that it can’t be published. So, Caitlin decides to print up several copies of the editorial and then just hand them out to students in the hallway.

Now, you may have noticed that Caitlin did not talk to Spike before writing or printing up her editorial. And, to Caitlin’s shock, Spike is not at all happy about the editorial, explaining that she’s under enough stress without everyone at the school reading about her life. Spike feels that Caitlin used her and Spike is totally correct. Everyone tells Caitlin that she’s a great writer and she’s a hero for standing up to the school administration but Spike is still pretty much alone and isolated at school. The episode ends with a classic depressing Degrassi freeze frame, this time of Spike walking up the school’s front steps and looking totally alone.

With this episode, Caitlin becomes the first of many crusading journalists to pass through the halls of Degrassi. What sets this story apart from future episodes about the school newspaper is its willingness to admit that not all issues are as a simple as they originally appear. I appreciated the fact that Spike was given a chance to call out Caitlin for essentially using Spike’s problems to promote herself and I liked the fact that the show didn’t pretend like there was some sort of easy or perfect solution for any of the issues that both Spike and Caitlin were dealing with.

Degrassi Junior High has often been called the most realistic and honest teen show ever made and episodes like this one show why.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Review: 3/18/24 — 3/24/24

Posted on March 24, 2024 by Lisa Marie Bowman

As I spend this Holy Week with my sisters, I shall be keeping Kate Middleton in my thoughts.

I’ve seen a lot of social media posts over the past few days that all, more or less, say that, “We should all feel ashamed for spreading rumors about William and Kate.” While I agree that there are a lot of people who should be ashamed, I don’t really appreciate this “we” business. I didn’t make a single joke, post a single rumor, or otherwise join in the online harassment of Kate and William. The same is true of most of the people that I know. Most people are better than that. If anyone should feel ashamed, it’s the members of the media who spread rumors and innuendo for clicks and attention. Don’t let them get away with pretending everyone else was in on it with them.

Here’s what I watched, read, and listened to this week: