I spent the first week after Halloween in a state of exhaustion. That’s the way it usually is after a successful horrorthon. I got a lot of work done at the office. I had the TV on for background noise for quite a bit of the time. Here’s what I watched:
Allo Allo (Sunday Night, PBS)
With the colonels being held hostage by the Communist Resistance, Michelle came up with a great plan to solve the problem! Rene could simply rob a bank! After all, Michelle said, they had access to the greatest safe cracker in all of France. LeClerc looked confused until he realized she was talking about him. Rene attempted to refuse but soon found himself in a bank, holding a torch while LeClerc attempted to break into the safe. It all led, of course, to an explosion. Monsieur Alphonse was upset that some of his money was set on fire to provide light in the vault. Who can blame him? Meanwhile, Officer Crabtree kept asking Michelle and Rene if there done “ribbing the bonk.” I laughed.
The Bachelorette (Tuesday Night, ABC)
Michelle sent Jamie home, which was good. But then she canceled the Cocktail Party, which …. eh. The whole “I’m going to cancel the cocktail party and go straight to the Rose Ceremony” thing has become the biggest Bachelorette cliché move. It’s right up there with questioning whether someone is on the show for the right reasons.
Baywatch Hawaii (Prime)
Running for two seasons, from 1999 to 2001 (wow, two centuries!), Baywatch Hawaii was an attempt to reenergize the fading popularity of Baywatch by moving all of the lifeguard action to a new state. Mitch (David “The Hoff” Hasselhoff) left California for Hawaii, where he started a new branch of Baywatch. JD (Michael Bergin), Jessie (Brooke Burns), and Newman (MICHAEL NEWMAN!) came with him and were joined by a group of new lifeguard trainees. Of the new cast members, a very young Jason Mamoa played an impetuous lifeguard named …. Jason.
Having binged the original Baywatch earlier this year, I figured that I might as well watch the two seasons of Baywatch Hawaii, just so I could get the complete story. Luckily, both seasons are on Prime.
On Thursday, I watched the first four episode and they weren’t particularly good. The Hoff looked extremely bored and really wasn’t in much of the show. Instead, most of the action revolved around Sean (Jason Brooks), the hardass instructor brought in to train the new lifegaurds and turn them into a team. Every episode, Sean threatened to send someone back to the mainland and, each time, the lifeguards proved themselves at the last minute. The first episode opened with the Hoff having an existential crisis in Hawaii, one that was solved when he saved a little girl from drowning. The second episode featured Sean yelling at the new recruits while the Hoff saved the exact same little girl from suffering a case of secondary drowning at her birthday party. This was followed by an episode where a new lifeguard named Dawn joined the team and immediately started scheming to seal JD away from from Jessie. Finally, in episode #4, Jason was nearly sent home for being too “self-reliant,” which didn’t make much sense to me but whatever. In all four episodes, the Hawiiaian scenery was lovely and everyone had an aesthetically pleasing body and really, that’s the main concern with a show like this.
On Friday, I watched episodes 4 through 8. Sean yelled at the lifeguards. Jason struggled to learn how to work as a member of a team. Dawn kept trying to steal everyone’s boyfriend. So far, this has been a pretty repetitive show. The same could be said of the original Baywatch but that show often seemed to be cheerfully aware of how silly it was whereas Baywatch Hawaii took itself a bit too seriously. The 8th episode did feature the return of Hobie. The Hoff was upset when he discovered that 1) Hobie was marrying a girl that the Hoff had never met and 2) Hobie was apparently embarrassed to introduce the Hoff to the wealthy parents of his wife-to-be. Embarrassed by the Hoff!? Say it ain’t so, Hobie! It all worked out in the end, though. The Hoff saved a wedding photographer who fell in the ocean and Hobie and his girlfriend decided to put off getting married and instead just decided to live together in sin. My aunt would be very disappointed in them.
Classic Concentration (Weekday Afternoons, Buzzr)
This was an old game show, in which contestants tried to match the pictures that were hiding under the squares. I watched two episodes on Wednesday and it was actually kind of a fun show.
Cold Case (Weekday Afternoons, Start TV)
On Monday’s episode, the Cold Case Squad investigated why Lilly never seemed to wash her hair. No, actually, they investigated a 1962 murder that had been disguised to look like a murder. Seriously, though, what was up with Lilly’s hair?
Court Cam (Wednesday Evening, A&E)
I watched two episodes on Wednesday evening. One featured a defendant who told the judge to go “<bleep> yourself” and I have to say that the A&E censorship beeps are so loud that they can actually give you a headache after a while.
Crossing Jordan (Weekday Afternoons, Start TV)
I watched two episodes on Monday but, for the most part, I just had the show on for background noise. In the first episode, Jordan and her team of quirky coroners were outraged over prison conditions. In the second episode, Jordan and the gang were outraged over a religious cult. There was a lot of quirky outrage.
Day of the Dead (Friday Night, SyFy)
Eh. It’s not really a bad show but, after watching three episodes this week to get caught up, I kind of feel that Day of the Dead is just not going to be for me. It’s hard to say why I don’t particularly care for it. The anti-fracking stuff is a bit too on-the-nose but, then again, George Romero wasn’t exactly subtle when it came to making his political points in the latter Dead films either. I think my main problem is that we’re four episodes in and it’s still doesn’t seem as if the show has established any sort of narrative momentum. So, I think I’m done with Day of the Dead for now.
Dennis The Menace (Weekday Mornings, Antenna TV)
I kind of watched two episodes of this show on Tuesday morning. I say “kind of” because I only had the TV on in the office for background noise and Dennis was such a sociopathic little brat that I really couldn’t bring myself to pay that much attention to him. Poor Mr. Wilson!
Fear the Walking Dead (Sunday Night, AMC)
Ghost Whisperer (Weekday morning, Start TV)
I watched an episode at Monday while I was at work. After a college student was scared into a coma, Melinda had to determine if it was the work of Bloody Mary or if it was just a ghost who needed help crossing over. This episode was from the Jay Mohr years so it had all of this weird sexual tension between Rick and Melinda, despite Melinda being married to Jim.
Hazel (Weekday Mornings, Antenna TV)
On Tuesday, I used two episodes of this maid-centered, old sitcom for background noise. In one, Hazel raised money to repair a broken vase. In the next one, she helped out a gardener who was in danger of getting fired. Hazel really needed to get a life outside of work.
I Dream of Jeannie (Weekday Afternoons, Antenna TV)
On Tuesday, I had two episodes on for background noise. One featured Jeannie’s dog causing chaos. The other featured Jeannie ruining the marriage of Major Nelson’s commanding officer. How many lives did Jeannie ruin during her reign of terror?
The Love Boat (Sunday Evening, MeTV)
Match Game ’76 (Weekday Mornings, Buzzr)
I watched two episodes of this old game show on Wednesday. Two contestants tried to match answers with a group of angry-looking alcholics. The entire set looked like it reeked of gin, cigarettes, and skunk weed.
Match Game/Hollywood Squares Hour (Weekday Mornings, Buzzr)
This was a weird game show from the 80s. Basically, it’s 30 minutes of the Match Game, followed by 30 minutes of Hollywood Squares with the same contestants and minor celebs taking part in both. I kind of watched an episode of Wednesday morning but, to be honest, the show was mostly just background noise while I organized the office.
Medium (Weekday Mornings, Start TV)
I caught an episode on Monday, while I was at work. Alison solved the case of a young woman who was pushed off a cliff. Alison and her incredibly understanding husband also wondered whether they should warn a friend that Alison had foreseen him having a fatal heart attack. The low-key and serious approach of Medium provided a clear contrast to the more sensationalistic approach of Ghost Whisperer. But Ghost Whisperer was a much more fun show to watch.
The Office (Sunday Night, Comedy Central)
Jim and Pam badgered Danny Cordray over why Danny didn’t ask Pam on a second date. This episode is a good example of how unlikable Jim and Pam became after they got married.
One Step Beyond (YouTube)
Open All Hours (Sunday Night, PBS)
Granville sadly wondered if he would ever marry. Arkwright told him he was too young to worry about such things, despite the fact that Granville appears to be nearly 50. No wonder Granville is losing his grip on reality.
Saved By The Bell (Sunday Morning, MeTV)
Survivor 41 (CBS, Wednesday Night)
Unforgettable (Weekday Afternoons, Start TV)
On Monday’s episode, Carrie and Al investigated a murder in upstate New York. It reminded Carrie of her sister’s murder, mostly because Carrie has total recall and everything reminds her of her sister’s murder. To be honest, I think if I had watched this show when it originally aired, I probably would have liked it. The photographic memory aspect is interesting and Poppy Montgomery and Dylan Walsh are likable in the lead roles.
Walking Dead: World Beyond (Sunday Night, AMC)
Saved by the Dead remains an entertaining-enough show. I’m still not sure what’s going on but I do enjoy all of the annoyed and rebellious attitudes.