The TSL Grindhouse: Record City (dir by Dennis Steinmetz)


1977’s Record City opens with a montage of rear-focused close-ups of women wearing short shorts and that pretty much tells you all that you really need to know about the film.  It’s crass, shameless, and very much a product of its time.

The film takes place over the course of one day at a California vinyl record shop.  It’s tempting to compare the film to something like Empire Records but, unlike Empire Records, Record City suggests that working in a record store is perhaps the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone.  The store is dirty and grimy.  The customers are rude and played by vaguely familiar comedy actors, all of whom seem to have been bitten by the overacting bug before stepping in front of the camera.  The employees all seem to hate each other.  Marty (Tim Thomerson) keeps getting slapped and kicked by Vivian (Deborah White).  Vivian keeps getting groped by almost every customer and employee who walks by her.  The only thing that Vivian hates more than men is other women.  The store’s owner (Jack Carter) is in trouble with the mob.  The store’s manager (Michael Callan) is lech who wears gold chains, keeps his shirt unbuttoned, and who expects the new cashier, Lorraine (Wendy Schaal), to sleep with him because, after all, he did hire her.  Danny (Dennis Bowen) is the shy guy with a crush on Lorraine.  Rupert (Stuart Goetz) is the nerdy virgin who goes from wearing a bowtie to dressing like a swinger but he still can’t get laid.  Both the customers and the employees are paranoid about “fairies” coming into Record City.  Pokey (Ed Begley, Jr.) wants to hold the place up and who can blame him?  Really, the only likable employee is a black man known only as The Wiz and that’s just because he’s played by Ted Lange.  (Yes, Isaac the Bartender from The Love Boat.)  Lange gets to perform a song at the end of the film.

When the film isn’t focused on the antics inside Record City, it’s all about the talent show that’s taking place in a nearby parking lot.  The talent show is hosted by radio DJ Gordon Kong (Rick Dees) and it gives the film an excuse to trot out a bunch of cameos, some of whom are more recognizable than others.  For instance, Gallagher — the comedian with the sledgehammer — shows up.  Kinky Friedman also shows up, playing himself and looking for records at Record City.  When he spots a woman with a blonde bowl cut and glasses, he accuses her of being John Denver and then grabs her breasts.  And to think — less  than 30 years later, Kinky Friedman would run for governor of my homestate.

Anyway, this is a terrible and rather boring movie but I did find it interesting for one reason.  It’s the reason why I find so many grindhouse films to be interesting.  Shot on location and for no other reason than to make money, Record City is a true product of its time.  There’s no attempt to try to make the 70s look nicer than they were.  There’s no attempt to try to make the record store look like anything more than a tacky establishment.  There’s an honesty to how low-rent the whole thing is.  Watching the movie is like stepping into a time machine and getting a chance to experience the past firsthand.  I was born long after the 70s but, after watching this film, I now feel like I’ve been there.

Film Review: The Concorde …. Airport ’79 (dir by David Lowell Rich)


In 1979’s The Concorde …. Airport ’79, Joe Patroni (George Kennedy) finally gets to fly the plane.

The plane is question is a Concorde, a supersonic airliner that can travel faster than the speed of sound.  When we first see the Concorde, it’s narrowly avoiding a bunch of dumbass hippies in a hot air balloon as it lands in Washington, D.C.  The recently widowed Joe Patroni joins a flight crew that includes neurotic Peter O’Neill (David Warner), who says that he has dreams in which he’s eaten by a banana, and suave co-pilot Paul Metrand (Alain Delon).  Because this is an Airport film, Mertrand is dating the head flight attendant, Isabelle (Syliva Kristel).  “You pilots are such men,” Isabelle says.  “It ain’t called a cockpit for nothing, honey,” Patroni replies.

(One thing that is not explained is just how exactly Joe Patroni has gone from being a chief technician in the first film to an airline executive in the second to a “liaison” in the third and finally to a pilot in the fourth.)

The Concorde is flying to Moscow with a stop-over in Paris.  There’s the usual collection of passengers, all of whom have their own barely-explored dramas.  Cicely Tyson plays a woman who is transporting a heart for a transplant.  She gets maybe four or five lines.  Eddie Albert is the owner of the airline and he’s traveling with his fourth wife.  (Of course, he’s old friends with Patroni.)  John Davidson is an American reporter who is in love with a Russian gymnast (Andrea Marcovicci).  Avery Schrieber is traveling with his deaf daughter.  Monica Lewis plays a former jazz great who will be performing at the Moscow Jazz Festival.  Jimmie Walker is her weed-smoking saxophonist.  Charo shows up as herself and gets kicked off the plane before it takes off.

The most important of the passengers is Maggie Whelan (Susan Blakely), a journalist who has evidence that her boyfriend, Kevin Harrison (Robert Wagner), is an arms trafficker.  Harrison is determined to prevent that evidence from being released so he programs a surface-to-air missile to chase the Concorde.  Patroni is able to do some swift maneuvers in order to avoid the missile, which means that we get multiple shots of passengers being tossed forward, backwards, and occasionally hanging upside down as Patroni flips over the plane.  Oddly no one really gets upset at Patroni about any of this and no one seems to be terribly worried about the fact that someone is obviously trying blow up their plane.  Even after the stop-over in Paris, everyone gets back on the Concorde!  That includes Maggie, who could have saved everyone a lot of trouble by just holding a press conference as soon as the plane landed in Paris.

A year after The Concorde came out, Airplane! pretty much ended the disaster genre.  However, even if Airplane! had never been released, I imagine The Concorde would have still been the final Airport film.  Everything about the film feels like the end of the line, from the terrible special effects to the nonsensical script to the Charo cameo and Martha Raye’s performance as a passenger with a weak bladder.  The first Airport film was an old-fashioned studio film standing defiant against the “New Hollywood.”  The second Airport film was a camp spectacular.  The third Airport film was an example of changing times.  The fourth Airport film is just silly.

And, really, that’s the main pleasure to be found in The Concorde.  It’s such an overwhelmingly silly film that it’s hard to look away from it.  For all of its weaknesses, The Concorde will always be remembered as the film that featured George Kennedy opening the cockpit window — while in flight — and shooting a flare gun at another plane.  As crazy as that scene is, just wait for the follow-up where Kennedy accidentally fires a second flare in the cockpit.  “Put that out,” Alain Delon says while David Warner grabs a fire extinguisher.  It’s a silly moment that it also, in its way, a great moment.

The Concorde brings the Airport franchise to a close.  At least George Kennedy finally got to fly a plane.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 3.3 “Two Balls And A Strike”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Daily Motion.

This week, the nurses go on strike.  Fire all of them!, I say.

Episode 3.3 “Two Balls and a Strike”

(Dir by David Anspaugh, originally aired on October 3rd, 1984)

It’s another depressing few days at St. Eligius.

When negotiations break down, all of the nurses — except for Shirley Daniels — go on strike.  Led by Nurse Rosenthal, they march out of the hospital and join a picket line in the rain.  Triumphant music plays on the soundtrack  Rosenthal gets on her bullhorn and announces that anyone making deliveries to the hospital will be crossing the picket line and not showing solidarity with the union.  Honestly, though?  Screw the union.  It’s a hospital!  It needs supplies.  There are people dying inside of that building and they’re not even going to have the dignity of clean linen because of Nurse Rosenthal and her stupid union.  And another thing …. Rosenthal is the head of union at St. Eligius.  So, why isn’t she marching in the rain and carrying a sign?  Why does she get to stand in the doorway and shout at people?  Get out there and suffer for your union, you British commie!

Obviously, the show wanted me to be inspired by Rosenthal and the union.  Whenever it switched over to the picket line, triumphant music started playing.  I’m with Nurse Daniels on this one, though.  Daniels didn’t vote the union so why should she have to suffer in the rain?  She stays on the job.  “Good luck,” Rosenthal tells her, “you’ll need it.”  And all I can say to that is that at least Shirley Daniels isn’t deserting the hospital’s patients.

While the nurses are on strike, Dr. Canavero is attacked by a hulking man wearing a ski mask.  Canavero is able to fight him off.  Westphall and everyone else at the hospital immediately assumes that the man was Peter White but Peter has an alibi.  He was in radiology when Canavero was attacked.  So, is there a new ski mask rapist haunting the hospital?  The first ski mask rapist storyline was pretty disturbing, especially since Peter got away with it.  I’m not sure I want to go through a second one.

Dr. Craig and Ellen went to couples therapy.  As usual, Dr. Craig got annoyed with the whole thing.  There’s really nothing more fun than watching Dr. Craig get annoyed.  No one gets annoyed better than William Daniels.  Still, it seemed to do Dr. Craig and Ellen some good, with Ellen making plans to go to Hawaii and Dr. Craig acknowledging that he’s not always the easiest person to deal with.

As for Dr. Westphall …. he spent most of this episode depressed.  Westphall is always depressed.

This is my final St. Elsewhere review for 2025.  Retro Television Review is taking a break for the holidays, so I can focus on Awards Season and Christmas movies!  St. Elsewhere will return on January 9th.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 3.2 “Playing God: Part Two”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Daily Motion.

This week, the hospital is a depressing place.

Episode 3.2 “Playing God: Part Two”

(Dir by Bruce Paltrow, originally aired on September 26th, 1984)

There was a lot going on in this episode.

Sister Domenica demanded that Sister Theresa be taken off of life support and she threatened to sue the hospital if it didn’t happen.  This led to Dr. Westphall telling another long and depressing story about his dead wife.  I don’t mean to be flippant about anyone’s tragedies but it’s hard not to notice that almost everything seems to lead to Westphall telling a depressing story.  Westphall is one of the most saddest television characters that I’ve ever come across.

The nurses are closer to striking.  A labor negotiator named Richard Clarendon (Herb Edelman) is brought in by the nurses and it’s hard not to notice that he looks a lot like Helen Rosenthal’s ex-husband.  I think I can already guess where this is heading.

A sick child was brought in by a woman (Tammy Grimes) who claimed to be his fairy godmother.  This gave Fiscus an excuse to get a consultation from Kathy Martin, who has abandoned the morgue for psychiatry and who is no longer dressing exclusively in black.

At home, Dr. Craig struggled with impotence.  At the hospital, Dr. Ehrlich gave an awkward lecture about whether or not one can have sex after heart surgery.

The firefighters are still recovering from their burns.

Clancy got an abortion, despite Morrison’s objections.

And yet, all that drama was overshadowed by the fact that the Dr. Peter White — the drug-addicted rapist who nearly killed more than a few patients due to his own incompetence — is once again walking the halls of St. Eligius.  White won his lawsuit.  I’m not really sure that I understand what the basis of his lawsuit was.  St. Eligius could only ask a select number of residents to return and, even if you overlook the fact that White was accused of rape, it’s not as if Dr. White was ever an especially competent doctor.  It would seem that just his struggle with drug addiction would be enough to justify not asking him to return.  And yet, somehow, Dr. Peter White is once again a resident at St. Eligius.  (The ruling was probably handed down by a Carter judge.)

“You just can’t admit that you were wrong about me!” White snaps at Westphall.

Westphall replies that White is a terrible human being and not worthy of being a doctor and that he will not be allowed to work with any patients at the hospital.  And, for once, I wanted to cheer Dr. Westphall.  He may be depressing but he understands exactly who and what Peter White is.

Whatever the future may hold for the hospital, I have a feeling that it’s not going to be happy.  Two episodes in and the third season has already settled into a pit of melancholy.  That said, melancholy is perhaps the right mood for a medical show.  When it comes to hospitals, there aren’t many happy endings.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 3.1 “Playing God, Part One”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Daily Motion.

Today, we start the third season of St. Elsewhere with some new opening credits!

Episode 3.1 “Playing God, Part One”

(Dir by Bruce Paltrow, originally aired on September 19th, 1984)

The opening of the third season finds that St. Eligius is just as depressing as it’s ever been.

Fiscus leads a group of new residents, including Dr. Elliott Axelrod (played by new series regular Stephen Furst), through the hospital.  Fiscus comes across as being an arrogant jackass.  I guess that’s the appeal of being a second-year resident.  You get to look down on all of the first-years.

Jack is still dating Clancy (young Helen Hunt).  When Clancy tells Jack that she’s pregnant, he’s shocked when she says she’s planning on getting an abortion.  Jack proposes to her.  Clancy says she’s not ready to get married and she’s not ready to have a baby.

Dr. Craig is still yelling at Dr. Ehrlich.  Dr. Ehrlich is still annoying the nurses.

Speaking of the nurses, they’re going on strike!

Three firefighters (one of whom is played by Erin Hudson) are injured while on the job and are rushed to St. Eligius with severe burns.  Luckily, plastic surgeon Bobby Caldwell (Mark Harmon, without that terrible mustache he wore during season two) is on call.

Dr. Peter White is working in a shady clinic and is still suing for his right to be a resident.

A traffic accident leaves one nun in a coma and apparently brain-dead.  Sister Doemnica (Michael Learned) wants to take her off life-support.  Westphall (Ed Flanders), who seems even more depressed than usual, disagrees.  It looks like there’s going to be some conflict about this.  For once, I’m on Westphall’s side.  I’m believer in hope.

Auschlander is still battling his cancer.

In other words, it’s another day at St. Eligius.  The third season premiere did a good job of re-introducing viewers to the hospital.  The snarkiness of Fiscus’s tour nicely balanced all of the more dramatic moments in the episode.  If anything has me worried, it’s the possible return of the loathsome Peter White.  How is the hospital going to deal with the return of a man who they all know is a rapist, even if he was somehow acquitted?  I guess we’ll find out.

Horror On TV: Dead of Night (dir by Dan Curtis)


For today’s horror on television, we’re very happy to present to you, Dead of Night!

From 1977, this television film is a horror anthology, made up of three stories directed by Dan Curtis and written by Richard Matheson.  In the first story, a youngish Ed Begley, Jr. travels through time.  In the 2nd story, Patrick Macnee plays a man whose wife is apparently being menaced by a vampire.  And in the third story, Joan Hackett plays a mother who brings her dead son back to life, just to discover that sometimes it’s best to just let sleeping corpses lies.

The entire anthology is good, though the third story is clearly the best and the most frightening.  Not only is it scary but it’s got a great twist ending.

Enjoy!

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.21 “Rough Cut”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, St. Eligius loses a resident.

Episode 2.21 “Rough Cut”

(Dir by Eric Laneuville, originally aired on May 9th, 1984)

Bobby Caldwell and Joan Halloran decide to stop being Boston’s most boring couple by taking an impromptu trip to Paris.  But then Bobby catches himself in his zipper while trying to put on his pants sans underwear and the trip is cancelled.  Bobby spends the rest of the episode walking very carefully.

Fiscus agrees to pose for a story on eligible Boston bachelors and soon finds himself being photographed wearing only a bow-tie and a pair of black briefs.  That’s more of Howie Mandel than I’ve ever wanted to see.  Potential suitors start to call the hospital.  Fiscus is excited until his discovers that they’re all men.

Dr. Wendy Armstrong commits suicide.

St. Elsewhere was a show that frequently mixed comedy and drama but it was still undeniably jarring how this episode went from Howie Mandel getting half-naked and Mark Harmon stiffly moving down a hospital corridor to Dr. Armstrong downing a bunch of pills and dying in the OR.  Wendy killed herself after she was told that she would be invited back to do the second year of her residency.  (The first two seasons of St. Elsewhere represented a year in the life of its characters.)  Bulimic, feeling guilty about a patient who miscarried, and traumatized by her assault at the hands of Peter White, Wendy ended things.

Before Wendy’s suicide, Westphall, Auschlander, and Craig had decided to cut Morrison from the program.  While Craig and Auschlander respected Morrison as a person, they felt that he was still struggling as a doctor.  Seriously, Dr. Craig?  You took his dead wife’s heart but you won’t find him a place at the hospital?  However, with Wendy dead, Morrison is invited to take her spot.  Morrison accepts.  So, I guess that worked out for him.

To the surprise of no one, Dr. White is also cut from the program.  He loudly announces that he’s going to sue for his right to continue as a resident.  “I’ll be back,” he shouts, sounding like Warren Stacy at the end of 10 To Midnight Remember how that turned out?

10 To Midnight (1983, dir by J. Lee Thompson, DP: Adam Greenberg)

This was a good episode.  Even though I never really cared much for Wendy’s character, her death was still handled well and it was emotionally effecting.  Next week, the second season of St. Elsewhere comes to a close.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.20 “Cramming”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, Peter White goes on trial.

Episode 2.20 “Cramming”

(Dir by Tim Matheson, originally aired on May 2nd, 1984)

Dr. Peter White finally goes on trial, charged with raping Kathy Martin and assaulting Wendy Armstrong.  For his attorney, he hires the same lawyer (Conrad Janis) who previously made the case against him at his disciplinary hearing.  The lawyer asks Kathy Martin about her own reputation at St. Eligius.  (“How many times have you had sex in the morgue?”)  Peter himself manages to pass a lie detector test.  (Sociopaths don’t have the same physical reactions to telling a lie as normal people.)  In the end, Peter is acquitted.

Shirley Daniels blames Kathy for the acquittal, saying that she should have come forward earlier.  As for Wendy, she deals with the trauma by binging and then purging.  When one of her patients miscarries after being admitted to the hospital, it’s determined that Wendy carelessly missed a heart murmur.  When Wendy argues that she’s been under pressure due to the trial, Dr. Craig points out that Wendy missed the heart murmur before the trial even started.  Wendy breaks down into tears.

I have to admit that Wendy Armstrong has never been one of my favorite characters on this show.  She’s the type of doctor who most people would dread having to deal with.  She knows all of the technical stuff but she has absolutely no idea how to relate to patients and she gets defensive whenever anyone disagrees with her.  Even if she hadn’t been attacked by Peter White, it seems like it was inevitable that she would eventually end up overlooking something with one of her patients.  That said, my heart still broke for her in this episode.  One gets the feeling that she’s one bad day away from breaking.

This episode ends with all of the residents taking their National Board exams.  The residents know that five of them will be cut from the program.  Having been acquitted, Dr. White approaches Westphall and Auschlander and announces that he doesn’t have any hard feelings towards them and he hopes that they’ll give him a fair shot.  “I’m innocent,” he lies.

Dr. Ehrlich is also nervous about his exams, cramming everything he can into his last minute study sessions.  His Aunt Cherise (Louise Lasser) comes to visit and help him deal with the end of his marraige to Roberta but Ehrlich is able to dump her off on Dr. Westphall.  After having an awkward dinner with the eccentric Cherise, Westphall realizes that he’s not ready to start dating again.

This episode left me reeling, to be honest.  The acquittal of Peter White was a gut punch.  I know he’s guilty.  Everyone in the hospital knows that he’s guilty.  But he’s acquitted.  Kathy Martin’s name is drugged through the mud.  Wendy Armstrong has gone from being determined to self-destructive.  But Peter White has not only gotten away with his crimes but he’s now apparently convinced that he can go back to being a doctor at St. Eligius.  And who knows?  He probably can.  It’s a messed up world.  It was messed up in 1984 and it’s messed up today.

Next week, we’ll find out which residents made the cut!

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.19 “The Women”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, St. Elsewhere tries something different.

Episode 2.19 “The Women”

(Dir by Bruce Paltrow, originally aired on March 28th, 1984)

Four women share a room at St. Eligius.

Evelyn Milbourne (Eva La Galliene) is elderly, headstrong, and rich.  She’s also about to lose her independence as it’s clear that she can no longer live on her own.

Rose Orso (Brenda Vacarro) is only in her 40s but is already showing signs of dementia.  She struggles to remember who she is.  Her husband is becoming a stranger.  At one point, she grabs some scissors.  At first, it seems like she might be planning on attacking one of the other women.  Instead, she cuts her hair and doesn’t do a very good job of it.

Paige (Blythe Danner) is in for a nose job and she tells a lot of stories about her glamorous life outside of the hospital.  Towards the end of the episode, she confesses that she’s actually a pathological liar who got her nose job because she didn’t have anything better to do.

The fourth woman never speaks.  She’s in a coma.  She dies in the middle of the night and is rolled out of the room with disturbing efficiency.

This episode was basically a play.  A few of the regulars got scenes of their own but, for the most part, the action stayed in that one hotel room and it focused on the four women.  When I first realized what this episode was going to be like, I really thought I was going to hate it.  It seemed like the sort of thing that would bring out the worst in the show’s writers.  Instead, it turned out to be a very well-done and extremely well-acted episode, one that reminded the viewer that every patient has their own story.  After spending most of this season focusing on the doctors, The Women announced that the patients matter too.

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 2.18 “Equinox”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Hulu and, for purchase, on Prime!

This week, Peter White returns to the hospital.

Episode 2.18 “Equinox”

(Dir by David Anspaugh, originally aired on March 14th, 1984)

A college student (Thomas Byrd) comes in after taking a hit to the groin during a touch football game.  It turns out that he might have testicular cancer and it falls to Dr. Cavanero to let him know that he will soon be down a ball.

Dr. Chandler is upset when his new girlfriend prefers to hang out with Luther.  Chandler accuses Luther of “shuckin’ and jivin’.”  Chandler’s girlfriend dumps him for being “mean.”  In a well-acted scene, Chandler talks to Morrison about how he’s expected to act one way as a black man and another way as a black doctor.

Fiscus makes the mistake of giving Elliott Axlerod (Stephen Furst) his lucky baseball cap.  Axelrod spills a urine sample on it and then accidentally sets the hat on fire while attempting to dry it.  Axlerod is having a terrible day until a man dressed like Paul Revere brings his horse into the ER for treatment.  It turns out that Axlerod’s father was veterinarian.  Axlerod cures the horse but he still has to get Fiscus a new hat.

Finally, Dr. White returns.  His charges have been reduced from attempted rape to assault.  Wendy Armstrong is not happy and starts to binge eat.  (And yet, as several nurses point out, she doesn’t gain a pound.  We all know what that means….)  When Kathy Martin sees Peter in the cafeteria, she yells that he raped her.  “You’re crazy,” Peter lies.

The episode ends with Dr. Chandler going for a run outside, stopping, and screaming into the air.

This episode was a bit uneven.  The Axlerod story worked because of the likability of Stephen Furst and not because the story itself was particularly clever.  The Philip Chandler/Jack Morrison conversation was the highlight of the episode, though the ending with Chandler screaming into the void was a bit overdone.

As for Dr. White, I’ve reached the point where I can’t even stand to look at him and I feel foolish for having any sympathy for him earlier in the season.  Hopefully, this season will end with Dr. White going to prison for life because I’m not sure how many more episodes I can handle of him wandering around the hospital with that smug look on his face.

Seriously, St. Elsewhere, take care of this guy soon….