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Late Night Retro Television Review: Highway to Heaven 3.11 “Jonathan Smith Goes To Washington”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Highway to Heaven, which aired on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and several other services!

This week, Jonathan invades the Senate.

Episode 3.11 “Jonathan Smith Goes To Washington”

(Dir by Michael Landon, originally aired on December 3rd, 1986)

Mark’s sister is getting married but her future stepdaughter desperately needs an experimental drug to survive a rare illness.  Unfortunately, the Senate is voting on a budget that will cut funding for experimental drugs.  So, Jonathan appears to Sen. Fritz McCorkindale (Eddie Albert) and pressures him to rewrite the budget.  Senator McCorkindale is reluctant until he learns that his grandson will also need an experimental drug.  So, it’s time to redo the end of Mr. Smith Goes To Washington, just with Jonathan providing advice to the Senator in his effort to keep the budget he wrote from being put to a vote.  This is one of those episodes where no one else can see Jonathan but they can see the Senator talking to Jonathan and, for some reason, no one wonders why the Senator is talking to himself.

This episode was sincere, earnest, heartfelt, well-intentioned, and ultimately very, very cringey.  Michael Landon’s heart was undoubtedly in the right place but, and this might just be my civil libertarian side coming out, I’m not really comfortable with the idea of an angel telling a senator how to vote on legislation.  This was kind of like that episode where Mark inspires the President to sign an arms treaty.  It was just too naive to be effective.

On another note, Mark refers to his sister as being his only relative but it seems like Mark visits a new relative nearly every episode.  That type of sloppy writing didn’t occur often on Highway to Heaven so I’m going to guess this episode was written and filmed quickly, so deeply did Landon believe in the episode’s message.  Again, you can’t fault Landon for caring and trying to do good but this episode just felt rushed.

Retro Television Review: Malibu CA 1.26 “The Triatholon”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Malibu CA, which aired in Syndication in 1998 and 1999.  The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

This week, season one comes to an end!

Episode 1.26 “The Triathlon”

(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on May 23rd, 1999)

Stads wants to enter the Malibu triathlon but training for it is such hard work and, over the past few episodes, Stads has gone from being an athletic and likable go-getter to becoming perhaps the whiniest character to have ever appeared on a Peter Engel-produced teen sitcom.  Scott volunteers to help Stads train which freaks out Jason because Jason still has feelings for Stads.

First, Jason tries to train for the triathlon too but it’s too much work for him.  So, Jason arranges for Murray to occupy Scott at the restaurant on the night before the triathlon.  Murray demands a lot of shrimp.  He follows Scott into the walk-in freezer.  Murray accidentally locks them in!  I guess they’re dead now.

Meanwhile, Jason pulls out his relationship scrapbook and keeps Stads up so late that she oversleeps and misses the triathlon.  Stads isn’t too upset about it because at least she got to spend time with Jason.  But then, after Murray and Scott are rescued from the freezer, she finds out that Jason arranged for Scott to miss their final training night.  Scott and Stads team up to get revenge and somehow, it leads to Jason dressing up in armor and riding a horse across the beach.

This show is so stupid.

Meanwhile, Traycee slips on the restaurant’s wet flood and decides to sue Peter so that she can appear in a commercial for a personal injury lawyer.  Peter goes out of his way to be nice to Traycee, leading to Traycee thinking that Peter wants to marry her and….

This show is so stupid!

But let’s give some credit where credit is due.  Brandon Brooks (who played Murray) and Priscilla Inga Taylor (who played Traycee) were the best things about the first season, largely because they both so embraced the absurdity of their characters.  While the rest of the cast often seemed to be sleepwalking through their roles, Brooks and Taylor totally threw themselves into their roles and they were responsible for what few laughs the show did achieve.  And I’ll admit that I laughed at Taylor and Brooks during the finale.  (I laughed when Taylor sang her little song about suing Peter.  And I laughed at Brooks muttering, “Surfing” over and over again because he wanted to make sure those were his last words.)  They deserve a lot of praise for their work.

The season finale ends with Stads and Jason, the two least likable characters on the show, sharing a kiss while the audience goes, “Whoo!”  The finale really reminded how much the show changed over the course of the first season.  True, Jason remained a sociopath.  However, Scott actually become a halfway decent human being.  Due to some very bad writing, Stads went from being likable to being whiny.  Murray went from being annoying to genuinely funny.  Peter went from being cool to being dorky.  Traycee went from being a background character to one of the show’s highlights.  And Sam went from being the center of the show to someone who was lucky to get any lines whatsoever.  The pilot featured Jason and Scott as high school students but now, Scott is a part-time sportscaster and we never hear any talk of homework or anything else involving school.  Change can be good but, in the case of this show, it’s just evidence that no one was really sure what Malibu CA was supposed to be about.

Next week, we start the second and final season.  Yay.

 

Late Night Retro Television Review: Monsters 3.7 “Small Blessing”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing Monsters, which aired in syndication from 1988 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on YouTube.

This week, comedians Julie Brown, Kevin Nealon, and David Spade deal with a baby who was born with a lot of very sharp teeth.  Is it a demon or is it just a little blessing?  Let’s find out.

Episode 3.7 “Small Blessing”

(Dir by Roger Nygard, originally aired on November 11th, 1990)

Julie Brown plays the mother of a three-month old baby and, like a lot of new mothers, she is exhausted.  The baby is constantly doing things like crying, crawling out of its crib, and walking on the ceiling.  The baby was also born with over 30 razor sharp teeth and it likes to eat meat.  (I’m going to assume Julie bottle-feeds.)  Julie’s husband (Kevin Nealon) insists that there is nothing wrong with their baby and he gets angry at his wife for constantly being exhausted.  Julie doesn’t know how much longer she can stand being around her carnivorous baby.  When a serial killer (David Spade) shows up at the house, the baby proves its worth.  Julie’s husband comes home to find her holding the baby and talking about how much she loves him.  Awwwww!

This episode was goofy but enjoyable.  It started out as a story about the exhaustion that every mother has felt and then it becomes a comedy in which Julie Brown is the only person who seems to notice that there is anything strange about her baby.  While her husband makes excuses for all of the baby’s odd behavior, Julie knows that it’s not normal for a baby to devour raw meat, climb on a ceiling, and bust its way out of its crib.  But then David Spade shows up with a big knife and the baby proves itself.  Go, Baby!

The main problem is that the baby looked really bad.  It wasn’t a real baby, of course.  It was obviously a puppet and, when I say obviously, I mean it was so clearly a fake baby that it actually worked against the show’s effectiveness.  There was a lot of good things about this episode, including the performances of Julie Brown, Kevin Nealon, and David Spade.  But that fake baby was just too fake to be as effective as it could have been.

Still, this episode proves that even mutant babies deserve love.

 

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 5.15 “I Don’t Play Anymore/Gopher’s Roommate/Crazy For You”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, Gopher thinks that he recognizes a passenger!

Episode 5.15 “I Don’t Play Anymore/Gopher’s Roommate/Crazy For You”

(Dir by Bob Sweeney, originally aired on January 23rd, 1982)

When Rachel (Mackenzie Phillips) boards the ship, Gopher is sure that they’ve met before.  Rachel tells Gopher that he must be mistaken and, in fact, she goes out of her way to avoid him.  Since no one on this ship has ever stopped to consider that getting the cruise line sued would be bad for their career, Gopher continues to follow Rachel around.  Rachel finally tells Gopher the truth.

She does know him.

In fact, they were once quite close.

In college, Rachel was Gopher’s roommate and she played for the football team.  However, after graduating college, she had gender-affirmation surgery and now, she goes by the name of Rachel.  Gopher is stunned and I know what you’re probably thinking.  You’re probably looking at the 1982 air date and assuming that the whole storyline becomes consumed with gay panic as Gopher grapples with having been attracted to his former roommate.  (Doc also hits on her but then again, Doc hits on anyone.)  Well, believe it or not, The Love Boat handles this storyline with a surprising amount of sensitivity.  Yes, Gopher is stunned at first.  But he soon comes to respect and support Rachel’s decision, even if he doesn’t fully understand it.  Physically, the rather slight Mackenzie Phillips is not particularly believable as a former football player but still, both she and Fred Grandy gave good performance in the story.  This week was a case of The Love Boat really taking me by surprise.

Meanwhile, psychiatrist Lisa Lessing (Joanna Cassidy) boards the boat to observe David Jackson (Dick Shawn), an exec who is asking for worker’s compensation because he claims to be mentally ill.  Lisa (hey!) is on board to check on David’s sanity.  Lisa comes to believe that David is not faking but — surprise! — David actually is faking and now he feels bad because he and Lisa have fallen in love.  Lisa decides to pretend to be crazy too.  Uhmmm, okay.

Pianist Paul Krakauer (James MacArthur) has retired from playing because of the crippling arthritis in his hands.  When he meets Irene (Donna Pescow), a maid on the ship, he falls in love and decides to give one last performance so that he can make a quick $25,000 and give it to Irene so she can get an operation to fix her ankle.  Turns out that Doc has some ‘medicine” that allows Paul to play the piano but it takes several hours to take it effect so Paul misses a date that he previously set up with Irene.  Irene is ready to dump David until she finds out why he stood her up.

So, this episode had one surprisingly sensitive and two kind of bland storylines.  (The pianist storyline was ultimately saved by Donna Pescow’s performance as Irene.)  And I’ve got a massive headache and a cold.  Bleh.  That said, this was actually an above-average cruise, featuring some good performances on the part of the passengers and the cruise.  This week’s trip on The Love Boat was worth it.

SHANE (The TV Series) – Episode 5: The Bitter, the Lonely (originally aired October 8th, 1966)

Posted on by Bradley Crain

Episode 5 opens with a man riding his horse down the hill towards a sweaty Shane (David Carradine) who’s plowing a field on the Starett ranch. The man gets off his horse, walks up to Shane and punches him right in the face. He then turns around and heads back towards his horse. Not putting up with strangers punching him in the face on this day, Shane gets up and punches the guy back in the face. The guy then surprisingly proceeds to knock Shane on his ass again, this time telling him his name in the most Bond-ian of ways, “It’s Posey…RG Posey” (Steve Ihnat). Through a variety of circumstances, we learn that Posey hates “sodbusters” who put up fences and work the ground. He hates sodbusters so much that when he rode up on a person he thought was a sodbuster, he just decided to knock the crap out of him.

Hanging out at Sam Grafton’s saloon, Posey tells the local cowhands about kicking Shane’s ass, so local cattle rancher Rufe Ryker (Bert Freed) hires him on the spot. He thinks that any man who has gotten the best of Shane is someone he wants on his side. Over time though, Posey’s hateful and bullying actions towards Tom Starett (Tom Starett), his daughter Marian Starett (Jill Ireland), and Shane are too much, even for Ryker. Posey’s one of those guys who refer to farmers as “apple knockers,” “nesters” and “stump jumpers.” On multiple occasions, he even says they’re not human. Ryker makes it clear to Posey that while he’s working with the Ryker outfit, the Starett’s will be treated respectfully. Not content to leave well enough alone, Posey decides to dam up the stream that flows onto the Starett’s ranch just because he can. When Shane finds out, he rides out to confront Posey, and the two men fight it out with shovels. Ryker rides up on the two men and fires Posey on the spot, and even helps Shane break up the dam. Unable to accept that his own bitterness and hate cost him his job, Posey decides to blame Shane and sets out to kill him. 

Episode 5 is an enjoyable episode. First, it has a couple of exciting action sequences. The scene where Shane and Posey fight with shovels is the best action scene in the series so far. Grown men swinging shovels at each other is extremely dangerous and this episode certainly captures that feeling. I also enjoyed the scene at the very end where young Joey Starett (Christopher Shea) is running through the field with Shane’s gun, trying to warn him that Posey’s on his way to kill him. It’s a well executed scene that had me on the edge of my seat. Second, this episode tackles an important social issue. Posey hates sodbusters “just because they’re different.” As mentioned earlier, in his own mind he’s reduced them to being less than human. This is beaten into our heads in a pretty heavy handed approach, but that’s perfectly fine. The episode aired over 58 years ago and has a strong “message” that illustrates how Posey’s hate has turned him into an angry, bitter man who blames others for his own bad decisions and problems. For a good example of this these days, just open up any social media app and scroll for a bit, and you’ll see how anger and bitterness continue to steal our joy. Finally, I think Steve Ihnat is good as Posey, a man so full of hate that he doesn’t have the first clue about how to actually be happy. Ihnat had a solid television career, appearing in almost every good TV show in the 1960’s. He would even direct the James Coburn rodeo movie from 1972 called THE HONKERS. Sadly, Ihnat would pass away in 1972 at just 37 years of age. 

Overall, I found episode 5 to be very good. It tells an exciting story, while teaching an important lesson about how a person who allows hate to fester in their heart will ultimately end up as a bitter and lonely loser. Shane’s relationship with Marian Starett doesn’t advance much in Episode 5 but they do look at each other longingly at one point. Now that I think about it, with all the hate shown by Posey, it would have been nice to see a little more love in this episode. Oh well, there’s always episode 6 to look forward to! 

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 1.4 “Over The Edge”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

There’s been a murder but don’t worry.  The bike patrol is here.

Episode 1.4 “Over the Edge”

(Dir by Cory Michael Eubanks, originally aired on March 23rd, 1996)

“I need some personal time!” TC announces to Lt. Palermo after TC’s childhood friend, Todd (Dave Oliver), washes up dead on the beach.  It turns out that Todd was killed in a skydiving incident and TC doesn’t think it was an accident.  Todd jumped out of 700 planes without dying so obviously something is up.

(Really?  700?  Did he just spend a year jumping out of plane after plane?  700 is a HUGE number, especially when it comes to risking your life.)

TC’s partner, Chris, is shocked to discover that TC had a friend because apparently, he never mentioned Todd in the past.  Well, Chris, this is only the fourth episode so it’s not like you two have been partners for that long.  This is a weird episode because it assume that the audience has an emotional investment in TC despite the fact that we know next to nothing about him.  We know that TC rides a bicycle.  We know that he comes from a rich family.  And we know he hardly ever smiles because being on the bicycle patrol is suuuuuuuuch an important responsibility.  Otherwise, TC is just kind of a boring guy.  I’m sorry his friend died because I’m sorry when anyone dies but other than that, I don’t really have any emotional connection to any of this.

Anyway, it turns out that Todd fell in with a bunch of Australian extreme athlete types and they shoved him out of an airplane without a properly working parachute.  I’m sure there was a reason why but, for the most part, this episode is just an excuse for TC to look grim while doing the whole extreme sports thing.  I remember that, when I was growing up, you’d always hear all this breathless talk about how someone was doing “extreme sports” but then it would just turn out they were riding a unicycle or rolling down a hill.  Remember bike jousting, where people would joust while slowly riding bicycles and it looked totally stupid but everyone would still go, “Whoa!” while watching?  That was dumb.

Speaking of dumb, I’m still having a hard time taking the idea of cops on bicycles seriously.  Did the people who made this show not realize how stupid the cast looks rolling up and down the boardwalk in their crisp white shirts and blue shorts?  Seriously, it’s hard to take them seriously.  Baywatch was a dumb show but at least those red swimsuits were visually effective.  The bicycle cops on Pacific Blue just look like idiots, no matter how fast they try to peddle.

This show just seems silly right now.  I’ve got over a 100 episodes left to review so I hope things will get better.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 6.3 “The Perfect Gentleman/Legend”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites.  Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

Smiles, everyone!

Episode 6.3 “The Perfect Gentleman/Legend”

(Dir by Philip Leacock, originally aired on October 30th, 1982)

Jimmy Jordan (Paul Williams, who appeared on a lot of these type of shows) is a rock star who witnessed a mob hit at one of his concerts.  Jimmy did what anyone would do.  He called the police.  They offered to protect him if he testified but then they told him that they probably wouldn’t be able to continue to protect him afterwards.  (Uhmm …. hello?  Witness Protection Program?)  Jimmy decided to fake his own death and then go to Fantasy Island.  His fantasy?  To not get caught by the two mobsters who have been sent to make sure that he’s actually dead.

Uhmmm …. that’s weird.  Like all of that was going on Jimmy just decided to go to Fantasy Island?  And then he shows up on Fantasy Island wearing a trenchcoat over his rock star jump suit?  Weird.

Fortunately, Michelle (Leslie Easterbrook) is on the island and her fantasy is apparently to have a new butler!  Soon, Jimmy is calling himself Godfrey and helping Michelle and her family save their business while Tracer (John Davis Chandler) and Killer (Joseph Ruskin) search for him.  Needless to say, Jimmy and Michelle fall in love and leave the island together and, unless I missed something, it appears that Jimmy is planning on just being Godfrey for the rest of his life.  He even drives Michelle and her daughter to the docks so that they can all fly off to the mainland.  I guess the world is going to go on believing that Jimmy’s dead and….

This fantasy raised way too many unanswered questions and Paul Williams was convincing neither as a rock star or a butler.  This is a fantasy that called out for someone like …. oh, I don’t know.  Sonny Bono, maybe.

The other fantasy was a bit of an improvement, just because it featured the unlikely but surprisingly likable pairing of Michelle Phillips and Andy Griffith.  Phillips plays Andrea Barclay, who has a beautiful singing voice but who suffers from crippling stage fright.  Her fantasy is to successfully perform in front of the toughest crowd ever.

Really?  Roarke says, The toughest crowd?

By now, guests should realize that whenever Roarke says something like that, it means your fantasy is going to be interpreted in a bizarre way that you never expected.  Considering that, the last time that Michelle Phillips was on the show, her fantasy to be the most famous woman in the world somehow led to her becoming Lady Godiva, Andrea really should have known better.  Instead, Andrea is shocked when she finds herself in the Old West, where Judge Roy Bean (Andy Griffith) has promised the citizens of Langtry, Texas that his favorite actress and singer, Lillie Langtry (Madlyn Rhue), will be performing for them.  When Lillie leaves without singing, it’s time for Andrea to put on a mask and pretend to be Lillie as she performs in Judge Bean’s saloon.  Yeah, it’s a silly fantasy but Andy Griffith and Michelle Phillips both put their heart into their performances.  Andy Griffith does his folksy-but-intelligent routine while Michelle Phillips especially deserves a lot of credit for taking things seriously.

This episode had the same problem as last week’s.  Everything felt very familiar.  Last week, we had what seemed like the show’s hundredth boxing and dancing fantasy.  This week, we have what feels like the hundredth singing fantasy.  After five seasons, it’s obvious that the show’s writers had started to run out of ideas.

Next week …. Roddy McDowall returns to Fantasy Island!  Yay!

 

Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 3.6 “Counterfeit”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

Tonight’s episode is weird.

Episode 3.6 “Counterfeit”

(Dir by John Florea, originally aired on October 20th, 1979)

Ponch is shocked to discover that he’s carrying several counterfeit twenties.  He turns the money into the Treasure Department, hoping that it will mean receiving an monetary award.  Instead, he’s told that his reward is helping the government crack down  on the bad guys.  Ha!  Take that, Ponch!

That said, you better believe that Ponch is there to help arrest the counterfeiters, who turn out to be a bunch of phony preachers working out of a church.  I know that sounds like the sort of thing that could be interesting.  But, for the most part, these guys are still just generic CHiPs bad guys, even if one of them is played by veteran screen tough guy Ralph Meeker.

Meanwhile, Ponch goes on a date with a woman and is upset when it appears that she’s shallow and doesn’t want to talk about anything that is the least bit intellectual.  That’s our, Ponch!  He’s never shallow!  Fortunately, it turns out that his date isn’t shallow either.  She was just pretending to be shallow to test whether or not Ponch was shallow.  And now, it’s time to dance!  Wait, what?  That doesn’t make any sense.  Ponch — when are you going to settle down?  Disco isn’t going to last forever.

While that’s going on, architect James O’Hara (played by veteran dwarf actor Billy Barty) becomes frustrated with people assuming that he can’t drive because of his size.  He gets tired of all the dumb jokes and the condescending remarks.  As a result, he keeps getting into minor accident whenever he drives on the highway.  This was a strange storyline, largely because O’Hara’s scenes made up over half the episode despite the fact that he had never appeared on the show before and he barely interacted with the members of the Highway Patrol.  A part of me wonders if maybe this episode was meant to be a backdoor pilot for a series about James O’Hara.  The other weird thing about this episode is that O’Hara’s frustration over people making fun of his height was often played for laughs.  The whole thing just felt well-intentioned but oddly tone deaf.

If you’re keeping track, this episode had two Ponch storylines and a storyline about a guy we had never seen before.  Sorry, Baker!  If we had any doubts about who was the favored partner as far as this show goes, this episode erased them.

This whole episode just felt weird.  On the plus side, there was a lot of nice California scenery and there were quite a few accidents, which is the main reason why most people would have been watching the show in the first place.  But this episode really is an example of how a show can get bogged down with a character that we’ve never seen before and that we’ll probably never see again.  The episode just never comes together.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 3.15 “Duty and Honor”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, another figure from Castillo’s past comes to Miami.

Episode 3.15 “Duty And Honor”

(Dir by John Nicollela, originally aired on February 6th, 1987)

There is apparently some controversy over what this episode should be called.  When it originally aired in 1987, it was called The Savage, after the serial killer who is pursued by Castillo.  When the episode later turned up in syndication, the title was changed to Duty and Honor, a reflection of the fact that the episode links back to Castillo’s (and, to a lesser extent, Crockett’s) service in Vietnam.  Since the imdb has chosen to go with Duty and Honor, I’ve decided to do the same.

The episode opens in Saigon, in the early 70s.  A clean-shaved Castillo (with a pony tail!) investigates the ritualistic murder of a prostitute.  It’s one of several murders that have occurred over the past few days, with all of the victims being sex workers.  Jump forward to Miami in the 80s and prostitutes are now once again being murdered.  Castillo recognizes the M.O. and soon, Crockett and Tubbs are investigating the local VA.  The doctor (Gary Basaraba) refuses to compromise the confidentiality of what his patients have told him but he does allow Crockett and Tubbs to speak to some of them.  One of the patients talks about a mysterious man who was known as The Savage, who was used as an assassin by the CIA.  The Savage was obsessed with killing and hated women because one violent encounter led to him getting castrated.

Tranh (Haing S. Ngor), who investigated the Saigon murders with Castillo, comes to Miami and shows Castillo that, whenever an enemy or critic of the United States has been assassinated overseas, it’s always coincided with a serial killer targeting prostitutes.  Tranh believes The Savage has come to Miami to assassinate a South American activist who is in town to give a speech.  Tranh and Castillo’s investigation leads them to the Savage’s CIA handler, Jack Colman (Brad Sullivan).  Colman makes clear that he really doesn’t care what The Savage does on his own time.

And yes, The Savage (played by Michael Wright), is indeed in Miami and he is killing prostitutes.  As played by Wright, The Savage is one of the most frightening villains to show up on Miami Vice.  He’s a relentless and sadistic killer who has no control over his impulses.  The CIA turned him into a weapon of war and now that the war is over, he no longer has a place in the real world.  Instead, he’s a nightmare creature who exists to execute anyone who Colman considers to be a threat.

(Around the same time this episode aired, Michael Wright also played the high school gang lord in The Principal.)

Up until the final twist, this episode is Miami Vice at its best — dark, moody, thought-provoking, and morally ambiguous.  After spending most of the season staring at the floor, Edward James Olmos finally gets to be the center of the action.  Unfortunately, the film ends with Tranh revealing that he was actually a spy for North Vietnam and that he’s now a colonel in the Vietnamese army.  He leaves Castillo a note, saying that he hopes they can still be friends and promote the type of peaceful world where nations will not create men like The Savage.  And while I agree that the CIA should not be breeding assassins, I still have to say, what’s up with all the pro-commie crap this season, Miami Vice?

Anyway, other than that, this was a good episode.  I should mention that Helena Bonham Carter briefly appears as Sonny’s new girlfriend.  Apparently, she’ll be the center of next week’s episode.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi High 1.9 & 1.10 “Sixteen”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1989 to 1991!  The series can be streamed on YouTube!

This week, we have a special one-hour episode of Degrassi High!

Episode 1.9 and 1.10 “Sixteen”

(Dir by Kit Hood, originally aired on January 9th, 1990)

Everyone’s turning sixteen at Degrassi High and they’re all dealing with in their own different ways.

Snake and Joey, for instance, are old enough now to take Driver’s Education.  Snake is nervous. Joey says that he’s been driving since he was twelve.  Both of them end up failing their driving test.  Don’t feel bad, guys!  It took me a few tries too!  Snake actually turns out to be an even worse driver than Joey and even takes out a cardboard family at one point.  Thanks to Joey and Snake’s bad driving, their poor driving instructor ends up with two black eyes and wearing a neck brace.  Nancy (Arlene Lott) finally get her first storyline in forever as she easily shows up Joey and Snake and gets her license on the first try.

(When I was learning how to drive, the instructor claimed that I had a lazy eye and yelled at me so much that I went home in tears.  My mom went to the driving school and raised Hell.  I never had to drive with that instructor again.)

Michelle, meanwhile, celebrates her birthday by moving out of her house.  Apparently, in Toronto, you only have to be sixteen to leave your parents and live on your own.  Michelle moves out because her racist father (Richard Krovsky) is upset with her for dating BLT.  Michelle gets her own apartment but she also has to take a job to pay the rent and she soon finds herself exhausted and sleeping through school.  Concerned with his physical and academic well-being, BLT sets aside his differences with Michelle’s father and tells him where to find her.  Michelle and her dad have a conversation.  Michelle is going to continue to live on her own but her father is going to help with the rent.  So …. okay.  I mean, Michelle left him because she didn’t want to live under her father’s rules and that was understandable because Michelle’s father really is a jerk.  But now that she’s on her own, Michelle’s father is going to pay her rent.  So, presumably, Michelle is once again in a position where her Dad can make the rules.  What if he tells her that he won’t pay her rent if she keeps seeing BLT?

While that’s going on, Lucy shoots a video for LD’s 16th birthday.  LD is still in the hospital, battling Leukemia.  LD doesn’t want anyone to know that she’s sick or that she’s lost all of her hair.  Still, Lucy does tell the Farrell twins about what’s going on.  Anyway, there’s a sweet scene in which Lucy, the twins, and Alexa visit LD in the hospital and bring her a birthday cake.  It was a nice scene and well-acted by Anais Granofsky (who plays Lucy) and Amanda Cook (who plays LD).  This episode was LD’s final appearance on Degrassi High which …. well, that’s kind of ominous, isn’t it?

Finally, Alexa can only watch helplessly as everyone announces that they will be missing her sweet sixteen birthday party.  Even her boyfriend, Simon, is going to be busy filming a commercial on Alexa’s birthday.  “Fine!” Alexa shouts, after cancelling her part, “I’ll be fifteen forever!”  In fact, the cake that Alexa brings to the hospital for LD was actually supposed to be for Alexa’s party.  “I’ll just have my mother bake another,” Alexa says.  Good for you, Alexa!

This was a bit of an uneven episode.  I actually preferred the driving class scenes to all of the birthday drama.  Of course, as a longtime Degrassi fan, I know that Joey is going to grow up to be a used car salesman.  Watching him struggle to drive made me smile.

Next week: Caitlin discovers that Claude is no good!  It’s about time!