Tag Archives: television

Retro Television Review: Malibu, CA 2.1 “Race Your Dream”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Malibu CA, which aired in Syndication in 1998 and 1999.  The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

It’s the second season but I’m too lazy to change the graphic. Sorry, not sorry.

Today we begin season 2 of the bane of my existence.

Episode 2.1 “Race Your Dream”

(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on October 9th, 1999)

The second season of Malibu CA starts with a few changes.

It’s firmly established that Scott and Jason are no longer in high school so I guess they graduated and, instead of going to college, they’re still working as busboys at their Dad’s restaurant.  I don’t know what type of message that sends but it’s probably not a good one.  (Also, I guess the show decided to forget about Scott having a job as a sportscaster.)

Murray is now working at the restaurant as well.

Priscilla Inga Taylor has officially joined the cast.  Gina May is no longer on the show.  Sam actually went to college after graduating.

Stads is still on the show and somehow, she’s even bitchier than usual in this episode.  And when I say “bitchy,’ I don’t mean that she’s an empowering diva who won’t let anyone stand in her way.  I mean that she’s whiny and in a bad mood for now particular reason.

Lisa Jones (Marquita Terry) is a medical student who gets a job as a waitress at the restaurant.  You’d think I would relate to her since we share the same name but nope.  During her job interview, she specifically points out that no one else at the restaurant is doing a good job.  It’s true but still kind of rude.  Admittedly, I’ve never had to actually interview for a job but it seems like criticizing the place where you want to work would be a mistake.  That’s especially true if you’re interviewing for a job that literally thousands of other people could do.

Scott has a crush on Lisa.  Lisa thinks Scott is a slacker.  Jason lies and says that Scott is in training for the U.S. Olympic try-outs.  WHAT!?  That’s what he came up with!  Maybe he could point out that Scott had a job as a sportscaster.  Or maybe he could reveal that Scott is the assistant manager of the restaurant.  Instead, he said that Scott is trying out for the OLYMPIC SWIM TEAM!  SERIOUSLY, LET THAT SINK IN!

Of course, Saved By The Bell: The New Class had an entire season where everyone on the show was a member of the swim team so maybe Peter Engel just had a thing for swimming.

Lisa is friends with someone who actually is a competitive swimmer.  She introduced him to Scott.  Scott gets challenged to a race.  Scott agrees.  He loses but only barely because …. WHAT!?  SCOTT IS SWIMMING AGAINST AN OLYMPIC ATHLETE!  What the Hell was wrong with our Olympic team in the 90s that a member of it could nearly get beaten by some Malibu beach bum?  WHAT THE HELL!?

THE SHOW IS STUPID!  STUPID!  STUPID!  STUPID MINDS!

Anyway, Lisa is impressed that Scott tried.  And Scott is told that there’s an outside chance that he actually could make the Olympics if he starts training….

SERIOUSLY, THIS IS SO STUPID!  Not even One World was this stupid!  Not even Hang Time had the audacity to suggest its characters were going to magically make the Olympic team.  (It is true that Scott is revealed to have been a good swimmer in high school.  I’m a good dancer.  It still doesn’t mean I’m joining The Paris Opera Ballet anytime soon.)

So, basically, season two is going to be the same as season one.

Brad’s Song of the Day – Guns N’ Roses and a memory of “Patience”

Posted on by Bradley Crain

Today is Axl Rose’s 63rd birthday, which reminded me of a very interesting memory I had of the first time I heard the song “Patience.” 

I grew up on Gospel music and Country music, but late in the 80’s I attended a summer camp called Project Caves where we learned about and explored various caverns in North Arkansas. While there, we were paired up with roommates from across the state. As I was getting to know my roommate on the first night, he shared his favorite current music album with me, which happened to be Appetite for Destruction by Guns N’ Roses. He had his cassette with him so we listened to it. And needless to say, I immediately loved it, especially the song “Sweet Child o’ Mine.”  I also loved “Welcome to the Jungle” and “Paradise City,” and we listened to the album almost on repeat over those couple of weeks. By the time I got back home to Toad Suck, I had “Sweet Child o’ Mine” memorized word for word and note for note. I couldn’t wait to tell my brother and sister about the songs. At first they kind of teased me and called me “heavy metal man,” but it wasn’t long before they were listening to (and loving) those songs as well. 

Music awards shows were a big deal around our house in the 80’s because that’s where we got to watch our favorite singers and bands perform. I remember The American Music Awards show being advertised, with one of their live performances to be provided by Guns N’ Roses. For historical reference, the show was on January 30, 1989, and I had recently turned 15. Giddy with excitement, my brother, my sister and I made sure we were in front of the TV that night so we could watch the group perform one of our favorite songs. Which would it be… Sweet Child o’ Mine, Paradise City, Welcome to the Jungle???

And then the performance started with Axl Rose whistling the slowest song imaginable, the song we’d all come to know as “Patience,” which would be released as a new single a few months later. We all looked at each other like WTF?! We listened to the song together in disappointment, but I do kinda remember liking the part at the end even that night. In full disclosure, the song would go on to grow on me, and I even like the song now, but it was NOT the song we were looking for that night. We still bring that up to each other and laugh at times.

Today, however, I share that performance with you! Happy birthday, Axl! And enjoy, my friends!

Late Night Retro Television Review: Monsters 3.8 “Shave and a Haircut, Two Bites”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing Monsters, which aired in syndication from 1988 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on YouTube.

Who needs a haircut?

(What is it with today’s reviews and hair?)

Episode 3.8 “Shave and a Haircut, Two Bites”

(Dir by John Strysik, originally aired on November 18th, 1990)

Tom (played by a young Matt LeBlanc) stands in front of an old timey barbershop and remembers when he was a teenager and he learned the truth about the place.  His friend, Kevin (Wil Wheaton), lived across the street from the barbershop and was convinced that the two elderly barbers who owned the place were actually vampires.  Kevin pointed out the customers were going inside with big jars of blood and then coming with little jars of blood.  Tommy remained skeptical.  I’m not sure why.  Jars of blood are a HUGE red flag.  Still, Tommy warned Kevin that if he continued to follow his vampire theory, he would probably get kicked out of all of his honors classes.  That was a risk that Kevin was willing to take.

Tommy and Kevin snuck into the barbershop one night and searched for evidence of vampires.  Kevin was serious while Tommy treated the whole thing as just being a big joke.  They were caught by the two barbers, Mr. Innes (John O’Leary) and Dr. D’Onofrio (Al Mancini), who revealed that they were not vampires.  Instead, they were just two guys who worshipped a giant slug creature who lived in the basement.  The slug creature stayed alive by drinking the blood that was brought into the barbershop.  In return, it offered up a smaller amount of its blood for the donors to drink.  The blood apparently allowed to people to live for a very long time.  So, I guess they were vampires but not really.

In the present, Tom gets a shave and a haircut and allows Kevin to draw some of his blood.  Then Kevin gets in the barber chair and Tom picks up the razor blade.  They both have noticeable scars on their neck.

This was an odd episode.  It was full of atmosphere and Tom’s voice over contributed to the creepy vibe.  It was generally well-acted.  Not even Wil Wheaton was too annoying.  The premise of the episode was intriguing but the episode’s pay-off fell a little flat.  I was happy that the show did something other than vampires but the weird slug creature really wasn’t that compelling either.  It felt like something out a Lovecraft short story but Lovecraft’s style of horror always works better when it’s something that the reader has to imagine as opposed to actually seeing.  This episode played out like an odd dream.  Even the ending feels like a fragment from a bigger narrative that has been lost to time.

Overall, though, I liked this episode and I appreciated the strange atmosphere.  Monsters was always the most fun when it was weird and this episode was definitely that.

 

Retro Television Review: The Love Boat 5.16 “Green, But Not Jolly/Past Perfect Love/Instant Family”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986!  The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!

This week, Julie wears a wig!

Episode 5.16 “Green, But Not Jolly/Past Perfect Love/Instant Family”

(Dir by Richard Kinon, originally aired on January 30th, 1982)

“Where’s Julie?” Captain Stubing demands and he’s got good reason.  The Love Boat is only a few minutes away from setting sail.  The passengers are checking in and being given directions to their cabins.  And yet, Julie McCoy — the cruise director — is nowhere to be seen!

Fire him, Captain!  Seriously, she’s been erratic this entire season and she seems to have a permanent cold so it’s time to get a new cruise director.

Julie shows up at the last minute.  She reveals that she’s late because she went to see her hair dresser.  And now, she’s a platinum blonde!  She says that she’s proud of her new look.  The rest of the crew pretends to like it.  As for those of us watching, it’s hard not to notice that Julie is actually just wearing a very obvious wig.

Watching this episode, I couldn’t help but think about the fact that, according to a documentary about the show that I recently watched on Tubi, Lauren Tewes was dealing with a fairly serious cocaine problem during the fifth season.  I don’t say that suggest anything bad about Lauren Tewes.  From what I’ve read, cocaine was everywhere in the 80s and she’s hardly the only performer from the time to get into trouble with it.  (Tewes, it should be noted, went to rehab and cleaned herself up.)  Instead, I point that out because a lot of Julie’s actions during the fifth season seem as if they’re best explained by Julie being under the influence.  The moodiness, the impulsivity, the fact that she suddenly doesn’t seem to be all that focused on her job, I think Julie had a problem!  Her hair isn’t platinum blonde.  It’s cocaine white!

Gopher eventually works up the courage to tell her that her new hair color is not flattering.  (And, to be honest, he’s right.)  Gopher gives her some hair dye that he picked up — uh oh! — and Julie uses it — JULIE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? — and she wakes up the next morning with green hair.  Julie spends the rest of the cruise in her cabin while the rest of the crew feels guilty.  Even Vicki has a hard time talking to Julie with her green hair.  Then the rest of the cruse decides to die their hair green in solidarity with Julie, just to discover hat Julie’s hair has gone back to its natural color….

Yeah, it’s silly but I kind of enjoyed the storyline.  I like stories about the crew and the members of the cast had enough chemistry that they could even carry a story as silly as this one.  They’re a fun group to watch.

As for the other two stories, Lynda Day George boards the ship with her hyperactive son (a young Corey Feldman).  She meets a high school coach (John Philip Law) who is not scared by her son.  This was a predictable story but I’m a horror fan and an Italian movie fan so seeing George, Feldman, and Law interacting made up for any narrative flaws.

The third story starred Bert Convy and Tanya Roberts and it was about reincarnation.  I don’t believe reincarnation, mostly because people who claim to remember their past lives never remember anything boring.  Instead, they always remember being members of French royalty or the mistress of a Spanish pirate.  As for this story, Convy lies and tries to convince Roberts that they were lovers in a past life.  But then he has black-and-white visions of a chandelier falling on Roberts.  Maybe they were once lovers at another time!  Honestly, who cares?

This was an above average cruise.  I’m glad Julie finally took off that wig.

 

SHANE (The TV Series) – Episode 6: Killer in the Valley (originally aired October 15th, 1966)

Posted on by Bradley Crain

Episode 6 begins with Shane (David Carradine) and Marian Starett (Jill Ireland) riding their horses out on the far reaches of the ranch. While enjoying the beauty of the land, they come across a very sick man in a wagon. He seems to be running a high fever. As they check into the situation, they find out that the man’s wife is in the back of the wagon dead. Shane realizes that it’s more than likely that the couple has a deadly disease. The man dies shortly after, so they bury them and burn the wagons. 

After returning back to the house, Marian starts coming down with a fever of her own. Shane sends Tom Starett (Tom Tully) to Sam’s general store to get quidine, the medicine they will need to treat Marian. Unfortunately, Sam is all out of quidine, so they’ll have to wait until  Barney the medicine drummer (Joseph Campanella) gets to town the next day. Tom takes a room in Sam’s hotel to wait. When local cattle rancher, Rufe Ryker (Burt Freed), gets wind of the fact that the Starett’s are needing quidine, he starts asking questions and finds out that Marian is sick. He decides he needs the quidine for his own farm just in case there’s an outbreak in the valley. When Barney the medicine drummer finally arrives in town, he immediately smells money and decides to hold out to the highest bidder, which means the wealthy Ryker will get the supply, leaving the Starett’s and everyone else out in the cold. When Tom reports this to Shane, and with Marian getting worse by the second, Shane decides he’s got to do something to get the medicine Marian needs, even kill if he has to. To hell with Ryker or anyone else who tries to stop him! 

This episode of SHANE reminded me of two very specific times in my life when I actually witnessed my fellow man either taking advantage of a terrible situation or panicking in a way that shows complete disregard for their friends and neighbors. The first time was the Arkansas ice storm of 2000. Beginning on Christmas Day of 2000, this once in a century ice storm descended upon our state, resulting in mass electrical outages in our community. I lived in town so my electricity was restored after three long days. I remember hearing of houses “out in the county” that did without electricity for weeks. There was a local business who had an inventory of generators. They promptly doubled the price of their generators and took advantage of their neighbors who were in a critical situation. The second time was when I lived through the COVID epidemic and witnessed people taking every roll of toilet paper and every drop of water they could find from the local grocery stores. Unfortunately the combination of fear, panic, greed and selfishness can bring out the very worst sides of our human nature!

The bad reminders aside, I enjoyed Episode 6 of SHANE. It was nice to see Shane and Marian away from the ranch together just enjoying the afternoon and talking. It was unfortunate that they were interrupted by the plague. It’s also in this episode that we get to see Shane and Marian kiss for the first time. Of course she was delirious with the fever and thinking she was talking to her dead husband Joe, but it was still Shane that she kissed and that counts for something! It was also nice seeing Shane go to town, kick some ass, and reveal the medicine drummer for the greedy coward that he is. And just for good measure, Ryker decided to kick his ass too. I liked that. I’d even go as far as saying that Episode 6 is one of the best episodes of SHANE yet. I’m still enjoying the series and look forward to episode 7! 

Late Night Retro Television Review: Pacific Blue 1.5 “Out Of The Past”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Pacific Blue, a cop show that aired from 1996 to 2000 on the USA Network!  It’s currently streaming everywhere, though I’m watching it on Tubi.

This show is proving difficult to review.

Episode 1.5 “Out of the Past”

(Dir by Terrence O’Hara, originally aired on March 30th, 1996)

Look, I tried.  I really did.

This episode should have fascinated me.  It featured three storylines.  Palermo was told take a vacation when it became obvious that a serial killer known as The Angel (Tim Thomerson) had returned to the beach and was targeting doctors.  Palermo and The Angel had a history, with Palermo failing to capture The Angel during the killer’s previous spree.  This time, The Angel tried to force a journalist (played by Barry Miller) to record his crimes for posterity.

Meanwhile, Chris and TC went undercover as guests at a hotel so that they could catch a thief and a peeping tom.  Chris and TC pretended to be romantically involved and were so dedicated to maintaining the act that they ended up spending a good deal of the episode hanging out together in their underwear.

Finally, both TC and Del Toro were obsessed with catching a speeding biker who continually managed to outrun and outmaneuver them.  Compounding their embarrassment was the revelation that the biker was a woman.

Mystery, empowerment, and lingerie.  Those are three of my favorites things but this episode still managed to thoroughly bore me.  I had to view it three times because I kept getting distracted whenever I tried to sit down and just watch the show.  Admittedly, with my ADHD, my attention span is on the short side but still, this episode of Pacific Blue was remarkable in that, no matter what happened, I just didn’t care.

Why?  Why can’t this show even work in a so-bad-its-good kind of way?  The characters are just boring and interchangeable.  The men are all grim and serious-minded and, physically, they’re all the same type.  They’re all tall and lean and blandly handsome and none of them have any quirks or interests to really make them stand-out.  The women are also bland and spend most of their time smirking at their male co-workers.  Who are these people?  Who cares?

Perhaps the biggest flaw with this episode and the show so far is that the members of the bicycle patrol just look dorky and they peddle around the beach.  The worse thing is when they have to chase a suspect down a flight of stairs and they literally pick and carry their bicycles as they do so.  It’s hard to take bicyclists seriously, even when they’re cops.

Watching the show, I kept thinking about the bicycle cops who used to patrol the campus where I went to college.  No one took them seriously and everyone knew the experience of being yanked over by one of them and being asked, “You been drinking tonight?” when you were totally sober.  It happened to me, one night, when an old ankle injury was acting up and I was walking with a slight limp.  I was already feeling self-conscious about it and getting stopped when all I wanted to do was get home and rest my ankle didn’t help.  The insistence that I must have been drunk or otherwise under the influence and also the assumption that I was obligated to stand around while the cops slowly talked to each other left me feeling violated.  Whenever I see TC or Palermo sitting on their bikes with their oh-so serious “I am a badass” facial expressions, I remember every bad experience that I’ve ever had or I’ve ever seen someone else have with a cop.

My hope is that Pacific Blue, over the course of its run, eventually found a way to make its characters less annoying and more likable.  (For instance, I don’t mind the cops on CHiPs because at least they’re entertaining.)  I guess we’ll find out!

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 6.4 “The Angel’s Triangle/Natchez Bound”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites.  Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week, an angel comes to the Island.

Episode 6.4 “The Angel’s Triangle/Natchez Bound”

(Dir by Bob Sweeney, originally aired on November 6th, 1982)

Death takes a holiday!

Well, not literally.  The Angel of Death, Michael Eden (played by Gary Collins), does come to Fantasy Island but he’s working.  Years ago, he was meant to take soul of Catharine Harris (Carol Lynley), a woman who was in a car accident with her husband, Brent Harris (Doug McClure).  Michael could not bring himself to allow Catharine to die.  So, she miraculously survived.  But now, years later, Michael has been sent to collect the soul of Brent.  Brent and Catharine have come to Fantasy Island to have the honeymoon they missed out on due to the car accident.  Michael has come to make sure that the honeymoon is a tragic one.

Michael very much wants to take Brent’s soul.  If Brent’s dead than maybe Michael and Catharine could (somehow) be together.  But when Brent is taken ill and sent to the Fantasy Island hospital, Michael sees how much Catharine loves her husband.  And he allow Brent to live, which seems a bit unfair to …. well, like anyone.  Or at the very least, anyone who has ever died or lost a loved one.

The interesting thing about this fantasy was that it established that Roarke is apparently not an angel.  When Roarke introduces Tattoo to Michael, Roarke says that Michael “is not like us.”  This leads to a funny moment in which Tattoo, upon hearing that Michael is the angel of death, announces that he some work to catch up on.  I always like it when Tattoo gets to do more than just wave at the airplane.  As for the rest of this fantasy, it wasn’t bad.  Carol Lynley did a good job as Catharine.  Gary Collins was a bit stiff but it kind of worked for his character.  Doug McClure was as goofy as ever.

The other fantasy features Jennilee Harrison as Jenny Ryan, a Vegas card dealer who wants to work on a Mississippi steamboat.  She gets her wish and promptly gets involved with helping a writer named Samuel Clemens (Stephen Shortridge, a.k.a. Beau on Welcome Back Kotter) and a kid named Huck Finn (Adam Rich) hide an escaped slave (Sam Scarber) from a dastardly gambler and slave hunter (Roddy McDowall).  Did I mention that Clemens is having trouble coming up with a plot for his new book?  Jenny inspires Mark Twain, helps Jim get to safety, and returns to the present with a pet frog.  Sure, why not?  This storyline was predictable, largely because I read Huckleberry Finn in high school.  However, Stephen Shortridge was, somewhat surprisingly given his work on Kotter, perfectly charming as Mark Twain and Roddy McDowall obviously enjoyed hamming up his villainy.  (To be honest, when I saw Roddy’s name in the opening credits, I was hoping he’d be returning as Satan.)

This was not a bad episode, especially compared to the previous season 6 episodes.  Both fantasies held me attention and apparently, the Angel of Death will leave you alone if he thinks you’re cute.  That’s good to know!

A Pre-empted Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 3.17 “Return of the Supercycle”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!

Sorry, last night’s review of CHiPs was pre-empted by my own need to get some rest after spending the previous few days dealing with the worst sinus pain ever.  (Well, maybe not ever but it was still pretty bad….)  Here’s last night’s episode of CHiPs, just a few hours late!  Regularly scheduled programming will resume soon.

Episode 3.17 “Return of the Supercycle”

(Dir by Bruce Kessler, originally aired on October 27th, 1979)

The Supercycle is back!  A thief on a supercharged motorcycle is robbing jewelry storefronts.  Baker takes the old Highway Patrol Supercycle out of storage so that he can go after the new Supercycle.  Baker suspects that the Roy Yarnell (George O’Hanlon, Jr) might be up to his old Supercycle tricks again but it turns out that Roy is innocent.  Instead, it’s his mechanic.

In other words: SUPERCYCLE SUPERCYCLE SUPERCYCLE!

Ponch spends the majority of this episode in a hospital bed.  Early on in the episode, Ponch crashes his motorcycle while chasing the new Supercycle and seriously injures himself.  Apparently, the crash was real and Estrada actually did injure himself.  Watching the episode, it’s easy to see that the show dealt with Estrada’s injuries by just giving all of Ponch’s lines to Baker.  For once, Baker is the one who bends the rules and gets to do all the cool stuff.  He even gets to romance a visiting member of the Highway Patrol, Kathy Mulligan (Anne Lockhart).  In any other episode, Ponch would have been the one doing all of that so it’s interesting to get to see Baker actually get to have a life for once.  And yes, before anyone asks, Estrada finds an excuse to remove his shirt even when he’s relaxing in a hospital bed.  No hospital gowns for Estrada!

The sad thing is that Larry Wilcox was definitely a better actor than Erik Estrada and he also looked a lot more believable on a motorcycle.  But, this episode shows that Estrada just had more screen presence.  As easy as it is to make fun of Ponch, Estrada’s over-the-top displays of vanity were often just what CHiPs needed.  Estrada may not have been a great actor but he amusing to watch.  Wilcox has a much more laid back presence.  He’s a believable cop but he’s just not as much fun to watch as Estrada.

Probably the most amusing thing about this episode is that, when Estrada (or his stuntman pretending to be Estrada) is lying on the pavement, Wilcox cannot bring himself to really act convincingly concerned or worried.  CHiPs is a bit infamous for the fact that Larry Wilcox and Erik Estrada did not have a great working relationship.  That’s all I could think about as I watched Baker casually step over Ponch’s prone form on the street.

Anyway, this episode has some spectacular motorcycle jumps and some good chase footage.  There was an occasionally amusing subplot where the men of the Highway Patrol worried that Kathy was reporting their behavior to Sacramento.  (Grossman, played by the invaluable Paul Linke, made me laugh with his sudden emphasis on doing everything by the book.)  The Supercycle was cool.  Everyone should have one.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 3.16 “Theresa”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

This week, a guest star breaks Sonny’s heart.

Episode 3.16 “Theresa”

(Dir by Virgil W. Vogel, originally aired on February 13th, 1987)

Sonny is planning on asking his girlfriend, Dr. Theresa Lyons (Helena Bonham-Carter), to marry him.  What Sonny doesn’t know is that Theresa is a junkie.  Back surgery caused her to develop a dependence on painkillers and, after she got in trouble for writing her own prescriptions, Theresa started dealing with drug dealers.  Theresa’s addiction has left her vulnerable to a long-haired drug lord named Wyatt (Brad Dourif).  Sonny recently arrested Wyatt but Wyatt has one of his dealers tell Theresa that he’ll only give her a fix if she steals the four evidence tapes from Sonny’s houseboat.  Theresa steals one tape.  The other tapes are destroyed when Wyatt bombs a police evidence warehouse!  Seriously, Wyatt doesn’t mess around and, when that warehouse goes up in flames, we’re reminded that Miami is not a place for the weak.  The police are in a war and they have no possible path to victory.  The bad guys are always willing to do what the police can not.

Most of this episode centers around Theresa and Sonny attempting to deal with her addiction and Sonny coming to realize that Theresa will have to return to the UK if she’s ever going to recover.  Even after Sonny gets suspended from the force while Internal Affairs investigates the theft of the tape, Theresa remains Sonny’s main concern.  It was actually kind of nice to see Sonny caring about someone again.  Don Johnson has been a bit inconsistent this season.  (There are several episodes were its obvious he was getting a bit bored with the part.)  But he does a good job in this episode.

As for the guest stars, Brad Dourif is charismatically evil as the smug and New Age-y Wyatt.  Helena Bonham Cater was only 20 when she appeared in this episode and she looked even younger.  That doesn’t exactly make her the most believable trauma doctor in the world.  Because of her youth, she’s miscast and there are a few times when she looks more like Crockett’s daughter than his girlfriend.  That said, Bonham Carter really sells the scene where she reveals her addiction to Crockett and she definitely captures the desperation of someone in need of another fix.

“Life’s not easy when you’re a lover,” Tubbs says at one point, “….or a primary investigator.”  With Sonny sidelined with his suspension and his personal drama, Tubbs got to play the role of concerned best friend and it’s one that Philip Michael Thomas always played well on the show.  If nothing else, you believe that Tubbs would take a bullet for his partner.  The show may end with Theresa returning to the UK and Sonny sadly looking down at the engagement ring that he’ll never give her but, fortunately, he’ll always have Tubbs.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi High 1.11 “All In A Good Cause:

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1989 to 1991!  The series can be streamed on YouTube!

This week, Claude shows that in yourself, you must believe.

Episode 1.11 “All In A Good Cause”

(Dir by Eleanore Lindo, originally aired on January 16th, 1990)

There’s a wonderful moment in this week’s episode in which Claude tells Caitlin that they have a moral obligation to vandalize a factory that is being used to make nuclear weapons.  (Yikes!  In downtown Toronto!?  Really, Canada!?)  Claude says that Martin Luther King, Jr. didn’t let the law stop him.

Caitlin agrees.

The Chicago Seven, Claude continues, didn’t let the law stop them from protesting for what was right.

“Who are the Chicago Seven?” Caitlin asks.

Claude gets frustrated.  “They were seven guys from Chicago.”

“What did they do?”

Claude, after a pause, “They were totally radical!”

Of course, Claude is incorrect.  The Chicago Seven were not seven guys from Chicago.  They were seven (originally eight) guys who came to Chicago from all over the country and they were arrested during the 1968 Democratic Convention.  As for whether or not they were totally radical …. well, it depends on who you ask.  Abbie Hoffman thought they were radical.  Bobby Seale thought all of them were poseurs with the exception of himself.  Jerry Rubin went on to become a businessman.  Tom Hayden went into state politics and married an Oscar winner.  As for the other members …. well, who cares?  There’s a movie about them if you really want to subject yourself to it.

Claude is like a lot of young activists.  He’s passionate and he’s convinced he’s going to save the world but he’s also totally shallow and given to hyperbole.  Claude’s plan to vandalize the factory amounts to spray painting one anodyne anti-nuke message on a wall in the middle of the night.  Caitlin serves as his lookout.  When the cops arrive, Claude runs and leaves Caitlin behind.  That stupid hippie!

Catilin does the right thing  She dumps that pretentious douchebag!  Good for her.  Don’t get me wrong.  I get it.  I went through a period of time where I had a weakness for passionate activists as well.  It was between my first bad boy phase and my second bad boy phase.  But Claude was just so annoying and, even worse, Caitlin dumped Joey for this loser.  Joey may not have known much about politics but Joey also would never have abandoned Caitlin to the cops.

This was a really good episode.  Along with the Caitlin/Claude fiasco, this episode also features Kathleen finally reporting her abusive ex-turned-stalker Scott to the police and getting a restraining order against him.  Good for Kathleen!  (Rebecca Haines really did a good job portraying Kathleen’s ordeal with Scott and, in the best Degrassi tradition, she showed the audience that there was more to Kathleen than they may have originally assumed.)  Even Arthur got a decent storyline this episode.  Eager to show that he could be just as dangerous and daring as Yick, he and Yick toilet-papered Raditch’s house.  What was funny about this plotline is that Arthur wanted to impress Luke.  This is the same Luke who gave Shane the PCP that caused him to fall off a bridge.  Get better heroes, Arthur!

This was an excellent episode.  It’s tempting to hope that Caitlin learned a lesson from this experience but those of us who have watched Degrassi: The Next Generation know better.