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Late Night Retro Television Review: CHiPs 2.2 “The Volunteers”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee!

This week, we’ve got ourselves a convoy!

Episode 2.2 “The Volunteers”

(Dir by John Florea, originally aired on September 23rd, 1978)

After a high-speed chase causes a robbery suspect to crash his car into a chemical storage facility (which subsequently explodes), three truckers have to get their trucks full of chlorine gas to the next available facility.  Unfortunately, it’s a 170-mile drive over rough terrain and it’s a very hot day.  If the gas gets to hot, it’ll explode.  If It doesn’t get to the storage facility in time, it’ll explode.  In fact, it appears that just about anything can make chlorine gas explode.  Californians might love chlorine for their pool but they don’t want it in the air.

Getraer assigns Ponch, Baker, Baricza, and Jane Turner to escort the trucks to the facility.  Jane Turner (Rana Ford) is a new member of the highway patrol.  She drives a squad car and she’s the first woman and only the second black person who we’ve seen working for the highway patrol on this show.  She doesn’t really do much in this episode and, about halfway through, she breaks off from the main group to help deal with a highway pile-up.  For that matter, Getraer and Baricza end up vanishing as well.  As usual, it’s all on Ponch and Baker.

Despite the danger of a chemical spill killing the population of Los Angeles county, Ponch spends most of this episode trying to get laid.  The episode opens with him leering at a jogging stewardess (Anna Upstrom) and then bragging about how he has a date with her later that night.

“She doesn’t smoke, drink, or dance,” Ponch says.

“What are you two going to do?” Baker earnestly asks.

Ponch arches his eyebrow and grins.

But Ponch is soon distracted by one of the truck drivers, a woman named Robbie Davis (Katherine Cannon), who is quick to yell that not only can she drive a truck but she can vote as well.  Ponch arches his eyebrow and grins.  Baker gets in on the action by saying, “Prettiest little truck driver I’ve ever seen.”

Robbie’s father (Tige Andrews) and the other trucker (Sam Brodie) all totally think Robbie should hook up with Ponch but they’re still amused when, late in the episode, Ponch accepts a ride from a blonde in a convertible.  Ponch arches and eyebrow and grins as he gets in the car.  WE GET IT, PONCH!

It’s not easy transporting chlorine gas.  Along with rough desert terrain, there’s also a group of beer-drinking rednecks who drive by in a pickup truck and threaten to shoot one of the tanks.  All of that drunk driving leads to another multi-car pile-up.  For some reason, one of the vehicles in the pile-up was transporting a tiger, which promptly gets loose and enters a grocery store.  Ponch and Baker grab raw meat from the butcher’s station and use it to trick the tiger into entering an office.  After they shut the door, the owner of the store yells at them for wasting meat.  There’s also a town puts up a roadblock to keep the trucks from coming through because they don’t want chlorine gas getting into the air.  And then there’s an avalanche, which causes chlorine gas to leak out of Robbie’s truck, sending her to the hospital.

Considering everything that happens in this episode, it’s odd that it all feels rather boring.  The best episodes of CHiPs focus on fast motorcycles and beautiful scenery.  This episode featured slow-moving trucks and the desert.  Bleh.  I hate the desert.  This episode also featured a lot of interaction between Robbie, her father, and their friend.  In fact, they were so prominently featured that it wouldn’t surprise me if this episode was meant to be a backdoor pilot for a trucking show.  (This episode aired in 1978, which was a big year for trucker movies.)  But the Davis family just wasn’t that interesting.

This episode didn’t really capture my attention.  Hopefully, next week will see a return of fast bikes and nice scenery.

The Films of 2024: Mea Culpa (dir by Tyler Perry)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

It’s another year and that means it’s time for another bad melodrama from Tyler Perry.

In Mea Culpa, Kelly Rowland plays Mea Harper, an Atlanta defense attorney who is hired to defend Zyair Malloy (Trevante Rhodes, delivering his lines with all of the passion of a first generation chatbot) against the charge that he murdered one of his many girlfriend.  Zyair is an artist, so he lives in a loft with an open elevator and a lot of mood lighting.  He’s been accused of not only murdering his ex but also using her blood and teeth in one of his paintings.  Protestors gather outside of a gallery showing his work and chant, “We hate Zyair!  We hate Zyair!”

Mea just happens to be the sister-in-law of Ray (Nick Sagar), the assistant district attorney who feels that prosecuting Zyair Malloy will be his ticket to the mayor’s office.  Mea’s entire family tells her that she needs to drop Zyair as a client and support her brother-in-law’s ambitions.  However, Mea doesn’t like her family.  Her cancer-stricken mother-in-law (Kerry O’Malley) is always talking how she wishes her youngest son had married someone else.  Mea’s husband, Kal (Sean Sagar), is a total wimp who doesn’t even have the guts to tell everyone that he lost his job and had to go to drug rehab.

Soon Zyair is hitting on Mea and trying to get her into his bed so that he can paint her.  Mea tries to resist but when she finds evidence that Kal has been going to a hotel with Ray’s wife, she gives in.  Except — uh oh! — it appears that there was a perfectly innocent explanation for the visit to the hotel!

Much like A Fall From Grace, Mea Culpa tries to be enjoyably sordid but it’s actually just dull.  You would think that, after 13 films, Perry would have finally learned something about both pacing and how to direct actors but Mea Culpa moves at a snail’s pace and it features some of the worst acting that I’ve ever seen.  The final third of the film features a few surprise twists but the plot also features so many unbelievable coincidences that even a crazy twist can’t save the film from being forgettable.

Tyler Perry is an interesting figure on the American pop culture landscape.  On the one hand, he’s a talented character actor.  One need only rewatch Gone Girl to see how good an actor Tyler Perry can be when he’s not directing himself.  And, as tempting as it may be, one should not discount the fact that his films and his television series have made a lot of money.  Despite what the critics might say, Tyler Perry does have an audience and apparently, he understands what they want.  Tyler Perry has also provided jobs and opportunities for blacks behind and in front of the camera.  Perry makes films featuring blacks playing something more than just the comedic relief or the best friend of a white person and, again, the importance of that should not be discounted.

On the other hand, Tyler Perry is a not-particularly imaginative director and a heavy-handed writer and Mea Culpa is more evidence of that.  As much as one might want to find something praiseworthy about him as a cinematic artist, the fact of the matter is that even Tyler Perry’s “good” films, like A Jazzman’s Blues, aren’t so much good as they’re just not quite as bad as usual.  Given his success and the struggle that blacks have faced trying to move up in the American film industry, I think that everyone would like for Tyler Perry to be a good director but he’s not.  He’s a good actor and a good businessman but as a director, Mea Culpa is all too typical of his output.

Retro Television Review: Miami Vice 2.12 “Phil the Shill”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show can be purchased on Prime!

The Vice Squad goes after Phil Collins!

Episode 2.11 “Phil the Shill”

(Dir by John Nicolella, originally aired on December 13th, 1985)

Switek and Zito call in sick so that they can go to the taping of a silly game show called Rat Race.  While Zito sits in the audience, Switek answers trivia questions about Elvis and competes in an obstacle course race with his spacey opponent (Emo Phillips).  Hosting the show is the very effusive and very British Phil Mayhew (Phil Collins).

As we already know, Switek knows everything about Elvis.  And he’s in better shape than Emo Phillips so, when it comes time for the obstacle course, he reaches and hits his buzzer first.  But Switek’s buzzer doesn’t go off.  Emo’s buzzer works and Emo proceeds to robotically recite a complex string of Elvis trivia.

To his horror, Switek realizes that the quiz show was fixed!

Switek and Zito decide that they want to take down Phil and reveal his con artist ways.  Unfortunately, for them, the rest of the Squad doesn’t care.  Crockett, in particular, is annoyed that Switek pretended to be sick to get a night off of work.  However, it then turns out that Phil has hooked up with Sarah MacPhail (Kyra Sedgwick), the girlfriend and business partner of Tony Rivers (Michael Margotta), a drug dealer that Crockett has spent months trying to set up.

It’s time to call in Izzy and have him pretend to be an interior decorator so that Phil can be tricked into throwing a party that can be attended by …. SONNY BURNETT AND RICO COOPER!  Listen, I know I mention that a lot but I just can’t let it go …. how are Sonny and Rico able to maintain their undercover identities when they’re constantly arresting major drug dealers and taking part in DEA busts?  How come it never occurs to the criminals that dealer Sonny Burnett might have something in common with cop Sonny Crockett?  Does no one ever notice that Sonny Burnett drives the same car and wears the same white suit as Sonny Crockett?

This was a bit of an odd episode.  It was obviously written so that Phil Collins (whose In The Air Tonight set the mood for the entire series) could play Phil Mayhew.  And while Phil Collins does not appear to have been an actor of amazing range, he still does a good job as the weaselly Phil Mayhew.  The Phil scenes are played for humor while the scenes with Tony Rivers definitely are not.  Tony is a violent sociopath who casually kills several people over the course of the episode.  Scenes of Switek pouting about the game show feel awkward when combined with scenes of Tony machine gunning two drug dealers.  Collins does a good job within his range and Michael Margotta is an energetic villain.  However, the best performance in this episode actually comes from Kyra Sedgwick, who does a great job as someone who eventually turns out to be just as ruthless and dangerous her boyfriend.

This is a fast-paced and energetic episode, one that moves quickly enough that the viewer doesn’t really have time to consider the oddness of Phil Mayhew getting involved with the same drug dealer that Crockett happens to be investigating.  Personally, I’m always happy when the members of the supporting cast get to do something more than just stand in the background.  Switek and Zito are a good team.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Degrassi Junior High 3.2 “Can’t Live With ‘Em: Part 2”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi Junior High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1987 to 1989!  The series can be streamed on YouTube!

The tragedy of Wheels continues.

Episode 3.2 “Can’t Live With ‘Em: Part Two”

(Dir by Kit Hood, originally aired on November 28th, 1988)

What a sad episode!

Much as with the previous episode, several storylines play out over the course of this episode.  For the most part, this episode is all about setting up the rest of the season.  Among the things that happen:

Lucy starts to hang out with Paul (Michael Blake), a student at Borden High and she stops hanging out with her best friend, L.D.

Arthur, who has taken to wearing a white scarf to school, finally admits to Yick that his family is rich and that he has been buying and selling stock in a company called Repco.  Yick responds by demanding that Arthur pay for their food when they go to the local diner.

Shane hears Spike talking to Liz about how much she misses having free time.  As soon as Spike gets home from school, she has to look after baby Emma while Spike’s mother goes to work.  Shane approaches Spike and says that he knows that she doesn’t want to talk to him but he’s still going to give her half of his allowance and get a part-time job to help her pay for a babysitter for Emma.

Nancy and Kathleen are still running for school president and getting aggressive in their campaigning.  Kathleen confesses to Melanie that she’s scared she’s going to lose.  Melanie points out that, even if she does come in second, Kathleen will still be Vice President.  Kathleen replies that she doesn’t want to be the second-in-command.  She wants it all.

(Kathleen is rarely portrayed sympathetically on this show but I totally related to how she felt.)

Scooter and Bartholomew Bond debate whether Superman is better than Spider-Man.

Even with all that going on, this episode is dominated by Wheels.  Last week, Wheels was informed that his parents had been killed by a drunk driver.  This week found him struggling with anger, depression, and survivor’s guilt.  He was supposed to be with his parents when they were going to the movies and if had gone with them instead of sneaking out to Joey’s house, Wheels probably would have died with his parents.  Wheels is haunted by a nightmare in which he wakes up to find his parents coming home from the movies.

“I thought you were dead!” Wheels says.

“We are,” his mother replies.

Wheels doesn’t know what’s going to happen.  Wheels is only 14 so living on his own is not an option.  His grandmother and grandfather live miles away so if Wheels goes to live with them, it’ll mean abandoning his entire life in Toronto but that might be better than having to enter the foster system.

When Wheels returns to school, no one knows how to talk to him.  Not even Snake is willing to approach him.  Only Joey tries to talk to Wheels.  The first time, Joey hands Wheels the demo tape that they made for the Zit Remedy.  Wheels breaks the tape.  The next time that Joey approaches Wheels, Wheels beats him up in the school hallway.  Joey — and this is why everyone loves him — doesn’t get angry at Wheels.  When Wheels finally approaches him and apologizes, Joey tells Wheels that he can beat him up whenever he needs to.

“I’m scared,” Wheels says.

Joey hugs him as the end credits role.

Awwwwwww!

This episode was Degrassi at its best, offering a lot of heartfelt emotions but no easy solutions.  Neil Hope (who had lost his own father right before shooting this episode) gives a heart-breaking performance as Wheels and Pat Mastroianni reminds us that, underneath Joey’s bluster, he’s a good person who truly cares about his friends.  Just as with last week, this episode is even more tragic if you know what’s destined to happen to the characters later on in the series.  For now, though, I’m just going to be happy that Wheels had a friend like Joey.

Retro Television Review: Shattered Innocence (dir by Sandor Stern)

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay.  Today’s film is 1988’s Shattered Innocence!  It  can be viewed on YouTube.

Shattered Innocence starts with a young woman shooting herself in a nice bedroom, while someone on the outside bangs on the door.

The rest of the movie shows the events the led up to the suicide of Pauleen Anderson (Jonna Lee).  On the one hand, starting a film with a literal bang is definitely a way to capture the audience’s attention.  On the other hand, letting us know that the story is going to end with a suicide pretty much robs the story of the element of surprise or the ability to take the viewer by surprise.  We know how the story is going to end and it doesn’t take long for us to figure out why it’s going to end that way.

From the minute we see Pauleen as a naive cheerleader with an overprotective family, we know that she’s going to end up hooking up with Cory (Kris Kamm), the local bad boy.  As soon as she graduates from high school and gets a job as a waitress, we know that Pauleen is not going to be staying in Kansas.  As soon as she and Cory end up in California and Cory suggests that Pauleen is pretty enough to be a model, we know that she’s going to end up modeling topless and that she’s going to deal with her nerves and her weight by snorting cocaine.  We also know that she’s going to end up appearing in adult films and that her concerned mother (Melinda Dillon) is constantly going to be begging her to come back home and forget about Los Angeles and its sinful ways.

Apparently based on a true story, there’s not really anything surprising about Shattered Innocence.  It tells a sordid story but, because it was made-for-TV, the scene usually ends right before anything really explicit happens.  (Ironically, by keeping the sordid stuff off-camera, the film invites the audience to imagine scenarios that are probably a hundred times more trashy than anything that could be recreated on film.)  Shattered Innocence gets by on innuendo, with frequent scenes of people saying stuff like, “Did you see the pictures?” or “You may recognize her from her centerfold.”  Nerdy Mel Erman (John Pleshette), who becomes Pauleen’s business partner, first meets her when he asks her to autograph the cover of Penthouse.  Otherwise, this film is actually pretty tame.

In fact, the one scene that really jumped out and made me go “Agck!” was a scene in which Pauleen’s nose suddenly started bleeding as a result of all the cocaine that she had recently done.  That was frightening, just because I’ve always had to deal with nosebleeds due to my allergies.  I hate them and the taste of blood in the back of my throat.  In that scene, I could relate to Pauleen’s shock and embarrassment.

Shattered Innocence tells a story that’s as old as Hollywood itself, which is a bit of a problem.  Too often, the movie just seems to be going through the expected motions.  Jonna Lee was a bit dull in the lead role but Melinda Dillion and John Pleshette both did well as the only two people who seemed to really care about Pauleen.  For the most part, though, Shattered Innocence was sordid without being memorable.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Check It Out! 2.4 “Operation Bannister”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Howard has an operation …. maybe.

Episode 2.4 “Operation Bannister”

(Dir by Alan Erlich, originally aired on October 24th, 1986)

A foolish attempt to impress a blonde customer by lifting and carrying a crate full of bottles lands Howard in the hospital.  He’s scheduled to have a hernia operation.  It should be a simple procedure but there’s a problem.  Howard’s a wimp.

Seriously, Howard spends this entire episode in a state of panic.  First, he has to deal with an ER doctor who is — *gasp* — a woman!  Then he discovers that the doctor who will be operating on him is barely out of medical school and looks like he’s about 16 years of age.  Then, he discovers that his roommate at the hospital is full of horror stories.  I guess it’s a good thing that Howard knows how to escape from hospitals because he ends up doing it several times.  Of course, every time, he’s promptly recaptured and sent back for his operation.

This episode ends on a curious note, with the store’s staff putting on a “welcome back” party three days after Howard’s operation just for Howard to reveal that he once again escaped from the hospital and, instead of getting the operation, he spent three days hiding out in a hotel.  He didn’t even let Edna know what he had done.  Two burly orderlies show up at the store and drag Howard back to the hospital as the end credits roll.

So, did Howard ever actually have the operation?  I’m going to assume that he did but it’s interesting that the episode leaves the storyline unresolved.  Instead of being about the operation, the episode instead becomes a meditation on fear and the foolishness of trying to escape fate.  Howard is very good at running away from his problem but, no matter how hard he tires, the orderlies always track him down.  Like the Grim Reaper, Canadian hospital orderlies cannot be escaped.

I hate hospitals so I could relate a bit more to this episode than some of the other episodes that I’ve seen of this show.  As an American who gets tired of hearing about every other country’s supposedly perfect health care system, I appreciated that this episode showed that hospitals suck no matter what country you’re in.

That said, I have to admit that, while watching, I got a bit annoyed with Howard.  I mean, first off, he shouldn’t have tried to pick up that crate to begin with.  Secondly, if you don’t want to have the operation, don’t have it.  Don’t keep returning to the hospital just because Edna and a bunch of orderlies yell at you.  And if you do decide to return to the hospital, own that choice and stick around until the operation’s done.  I understood Howard’s feelings but he still came across as being a bit of a wimp in this episode.  Nobody likes a wimp.

Next week, according to the imdb, Howard’s niece will make an appearance.  Let’s hope she has more guts than her uncle.

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 4/21/24 — 4/27/24

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Baby On Board (YouTube)

I wrote about Baby on Board here!

Baywatch Nights (YouTube)

I wrote about Baywatch Nights here!

Check It Out! (YouTube)

My review of this week’s episode will drop in about 90 minutes.

CHiPs (Freevee)

I wrote about CHiPs here!

Degrassi Junior High (YouTube)

I wrote about Degrassi Junior High here!  Poor Wheels.

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched an episode in which Dr. Phil confronted a pathological liar named Brittany.  She stormed off stage.  The audience gasped.

On Monday, I watched a two-part episode featuring a crazy woman who insisted that both of her children were paranoid schizophrenic.  Dr. Phil said he would help her if she agreed to delete her YouTube channel.  “No,” the woman replied.  The audience gasped.

On Tuesday, I watched a two-part episode in which a man was falsely accused by his ex-wife and mother-in-law of sexually abusing his daughter.  What a toxic family!  I mean, the guy was kind of a jerk but no one deserves to be falsely accused of something like that.

On Wednesday, I watched a divorced couple yell at each other over who was responsible for their son’s video game addiction.

On Thursday, I watched a two-part episode in which a masseuse named Tarek came on the show to try to clear his name after he was accused of sexually assaulting 18 of his clients.  Tarek asked to be on the show and demanded to take a polygraph exam.  What was weird about that was the fact that Tarek was obviously guilty and a terrible liar.  No one was shocked when he failed the polygraph.

Later, I watched an episode about a mother-in-law who accused her son’s wife of being the “spawn of Satan.”  Yikes!  The wife was actually very nice and had the patience of a saint.

On Friday morning, I watched an episode in which Phil got annoyed with a teenage girl who hoped that getting pregnant would lead to her getting her own reality show.

On Saturday, I watched an episode featuring a young woman who insisted that her mother had kidnapped her son.  The young woman wanted to sue her parents but she also wanted them to lend her the money for the attorney.

Dragnet (YouTube)

On Sunday, I watched my favorite episode of this old cop show.  Friday and Gannon appeared on a talk show and debated an underground newspaper editor and a sociologist.  Someday, I’ll write a full-length review of this episode because, from a historical point of view, it’s really is spectacular.

I followed this up with my second favorite episode, in which Friday enrolled in night school and promptly arrested one of his classmates.

Fantasy Island (Daily Motion)

I wrote about Fantasy Island here!

Friday the 13th: The Series (YouTube)

I wrote about Friday the 13th here!

Highway to Heaven (Freevee)

I wrote about Highway to Heaven here!

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I wrote about The Love Boat here!

Miami Vice (Prime)

I wrote about Miami Vice here!

Monsters (YouTube)

I wrote about Monsters here!

Snub UK (Night Flight Plus)

I watched an episode of this old music show on Friday night.  The music videos were enjoyably trippy.

T and T (Tubi)

I wrote about T and T here.

Welcome Back, Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back, Kotter here!

World’s Most Evil Killers (YouTube)

On Friday, I watched an episode about Arizona’s Baseline Killer.  He was definitely evil and he was a killer so I guess the show delivered what it promised.

World’s Most Evil Prisoners (YouTube)

On Wednesday morning, I watched a profile of Christa Pike, the youngest inmate on Tennessee’s Death Row.  And yes, Christa Pike did appear to be really, really evil.  As a fellow redhead, I was upset to see a member of the 2% behaving so badly.

On Friday, I watched an episode about T.D. Bingham, a leader of the Aryan Brotherhood.  He was definitely a scary guy, as well as being an evil prisoner.  So, just as with World’s Most Evil Killers, this show delivered what it promised.

Retro Television Review: Welcome Back Kotter 3.19 “Epstein’s Term Paper”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC  from 1975 to 1979.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, it’s term paper time!

Episode 3.19 “Epstein’s Term Paper”

(Dir by Bob Claver, originally aired on January 19th,1978)

It’s term paper time!

Freddie Washington’s term paper is on the Dust Bowl, which he turns in despite the fact that, as he explains it, “Dust killed my grandma.”

Vinnie’s term paper is on the Irish Potato Famine.  Vinnie thinks that the potato famine had something to do with no one in Ireland being able to eat French fries.

Arnold Horshack’s paper is on Joseph Stalin and the Purges, despite the fact that Horshack doesn’t know who Stalin was.

As Gabe tells Julie when she stops by his classroom for lunch, he’s really impressed with all the term papers.  In fact, he is concerned because he’s too impressed.  The Sweathogs have never been A-students so why are they now turning in perfect term papers?  Gabe, however, is looking forward to reading Epstein’s term paper on FDR.  Eleven years ago, Gabe turned in a term paper on FDR in which he described FDR as being a “white knight.”

Julie takes one look at Epstein’s term paper and mentions that Epstein used the exact same phrase.

Yes, you guessed it.  The Sweathogs bought a bunch of old test papers from Carvelli (Charles Fleischer) and attempted to pass them off their own.  Only Angie wrote her own term paper.  She got a B minus, which she is happy about.  Vinnie, Horshack, Freddie, and Epstein all gets F’s.  They’re not happy about it because they spent five dollars apiece for those papers.

“I could have written it myself,” Vinnie says, “and gotten an F for free!”

Gabe, however, tells the Sweathogs that he’ll give them one final chance to write new term papers.  Gabe explains that just because he turned in a term paper on FDR, that doesn’t mean that he wrote it.  So I guess the lesson here is that Gabe cheated and now he’s a teacher so cheating isn’t the end of the world.

Considering the subject matter and the fact that Gabe usually tries to encourage the Sweathogs to not take shortcuts, this was a surprisingly slight episode.  One gets the feeling that, if this story had been used during the first season, Gabe would have been a lot more upset about the fake term papers and he would have encouraged the Sweathogs to believe in themselves and their abilities.  However, in the third season, everything was treated as a big joke.  Gabe no longer seems that concerned about the Sweathogs realizing that they’re capable of being more than just Sweathogs.  Watching this episode, I couldn’t help but think about how the Sweathogs lost their edge halfway through the second season.  They used to be believable as delinquents, albeit goofy ones.  By the time the third season began, they had all been reduced to a series of catch phrases and gimmicks.  Robert Hegyes had some funny moments in this episode but it’s still hard not miss the old Epstein, the one who voted most likely to take a life.

As for this episode’s opening and closing jokes, Gabe told Mr. Woodman about his Uncle Murrow the biologist.  Woodman was not amused.  Later, Gabe tried to tell Julie about his Uncle Joe, just for Julie to shout out the punchline before he finished.  Gabe was not amused.

Late Night Retro Television Review: Friday the 13th: The Series 2.1 “Doorway to Hell”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The show can be found on YouTube!

This week, the second season beings with the return of Uncle Lewis!

(For a dead guy, Lewis sure does return a lot.)

Episode 2.1 “Doorway to Hell”

(Dir by William Fruet, originally aired on September 26th, 1988)

The second season begins in much the same way that the first one ended, with Uncle Lewis (played, as always, be R.G. Armstrong) trying to re-enter the world of the living.

This time, he’s doing it through mirrors.  According to Jack, a mirror that “witnesses” an occult ceremony becomes a doorway to the dark realms that sit between Heaven and Hell.  Lewis lives in the dark realms and, since he was a big fan of mirrors, his reflection occasionally appears in the a mirror at Curious Goods.  When Micki and Ryan find evidence that Lewis owned a house, they ignore Jack’s warning and go to investigate on their own.

They discover that the decrepit house is being used as a hideout by Buddy (Charle Landry) and Eddie (Louis Ferreira), two criminals who have just held up a gas station and killed an attendant.  Buddy wants to go straight and was pretty much coerced into taking part in the robbery.  Eddie, on the other hand, is a total psychopath who ties up both Micki and Ryan and laughs when they try to warn him about Uncle Lewis.

The house, not surprisingly, is full of mirrors and soon, Buddy gets sucked into one of them.  When Buddy returns to the house, he’s possessed and shooting electricity from his fingertips.  He kills Eddie and then chases Ryan and Micki around both the house and the dark realms.

Jack and his friend Rashid (Elias Zarou) watch all of this reflected in a shard of reflective glass that they found at the antique store.  Whenever things start to get really exciting or scary at the mansion, we cut to Jack and Rashid staring at shard of glass and saying, “Get out of there, Ryan!”

Eventually, Jack goes to the house, enters the dark realms and distracts Lewis long enough for Ryan and Micki to destroy all of the mirrors in the house.  Jack manages to escape just in time, Buddy apparently become unpossessed and the ghost of Uncle Lewis declares that he will return.  Lewis’s constant shouts of “I’ll be back” are such a cliche that they can’t help but be a bit charming, especially since R.G. Armstrong always seems to be having so much fun chewing the scenery whenever he shows up as Lewis.

The second season premiere did an effective job of reminding old viewers and informing new viewers about what the show was about.  The haunted house was an effectively creepy location and the dark realms were nicely atmospheric.  I do wish that the premiere had not once again deployed the tired idea of Micki and Ryan ignoring Jack’s warning about impulsively investigating something on their own.  I mean, that has never worked out for them.  You would think that Ryan and Micki would have learned the lesson by now.  Otherwise, this episode got the second season off to a good start.