Continuing this somewhat impromptu tribute to the year 1968, today’s song of the day comes to us from Ennio Morricone’s classic score for Sergio Leone’s Once Upon A Time In The West!
Continuing this somewhat impromptu tribute to the year 1968, today’s song of the day comes to us from Ennio Morricone’s classic score for Sergio Leone’s Once Upon A Time In The West!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983. The entire show is currently streaming on Prime!
Merry Christmas!
Episode 3.15 “Christmas Watch”
(Dir by Phil Bondelli, originally aired on December 15th, 1979)
It’s Christmas in Los Angeles! Bob (Don Reid) and Alice Piermont (Pamela Susan Shoop) are a married couple who drive around in a blue van and rob people. They steal a 15 century bell from an orphanage! How can the orphans have a merry Christmas without their bell!?
Don’t worry, Ponch is on the case! Ponch will not only find their bell but he’ll date their teacher as well. Of course, Ponch is feeling a little down because his family is in Chicago. But then his mother (Anna Navarro) shows up and, in a rare nod to continuity from this show, his mother is played by the same actress who played her the last time that she came down to Los Angeles. Ponch not only get to spend time with his mother but he also gets a boost when a businessman who was earlier cited for driving while intoxicated shows up at the station so that he can thank Ponch in person. The lesson this Christmas? Ponch can do no wrong.
The thieving couple is caught after the are involved in a accident and, instead of waiting for the police to arrive, they just slip a few thousand to the other driver and then try to escape. No such luck. They are captured and the kids get back their bell. Merry Christmas to all, except for the couple going to jail.
This was a typical episode of CHiPs, in which the California sun continued to shine while everyone celebrated Christmas. There were a few decent chases and some nice shots of the local scenery. In the end, Ponch did everything right and got a date. Merry Christmas! It wasn’t a bad episode, especially if you’re a fan of Erik Estrada. Larry Wilcox fans will probably be a little disappointed in how little there was for him to do. It’s the holidays and CHiPs is all about Ponch.
April Davis (Brenna D’Amico) has just inherited a small fortune and she’s got a wonderful boyfriend named Robert. Plus, she lives in Texas! Her life is going wonderfully! But then, a terrible car accident leaves her in a five-month coma. When she finally awakens, she discovers that the people in the other car — a mother and her children — were killed in the accident. Because she had a few drinks before she got behind the wheel and she was texting with her boyfriend while driving, she is now being investigated for vehicular manslaughter.
April is taken home by Robert (Nick Marini) but it turns out that things have changed. As Robert explains it, April was in a coma for five months so he had to handle things until she woke up. As a result, he now has a key to the house. He bought her a new phone to replace the one that was taken by the police. He bought her a new monitor for her computer. Robert’s been on top of everything! What a great guy …. except, there seems to be something different about Robert as well. He’s angrier than April remembered and he’s controlling. He says it’s for April’s own good but who knows for sure? April starts to have strange dreams and nightmares and soon, she’s wondering what’s real and what isn’t.
Released in 2021 and filmed in the lovely town of Corsicana, Texas, Night Night is an effectively dream-like thriller, one that features a good lead performance from Brenna D’Amico and a plot that’s full of twists and turns. Despite the low budget, director Niki Koss does a good job of creating a properly ominous atmosphere. This film really took me by surprise. I was mostly watching because Eric Roberts was in it but the film’s story drew me in pretty quickly.
As for Eric Roberts, this is one of his one-scene wonders. He plays Dr. Nelson and gives April an update on her condition after she awakens. The late Tony Todd also makes an appearance in this film, playing April’s attorney. Neither role is big but the film itself works so well that it doesn’t matter that neither Roberts nor Todd play particularly prominent roles. This was a good, independent thriller. Give it a chance.
Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed:
I did check my stock portfolio this morning. Jeff warned me not to. Erin told me not to. If I had asked my other sisters, I’m sure they would have said, “Don’t do it, just let our broker deal with it….”
But I checked. Agck!
It’s funny. I didn’t really care about money until I had it.
Anyway, today’s song of the day should make sense now.
The best things in life are free
But you can give them to the birds and bees
I need money (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
Your love give me such a thrill
But your love don’t pay my bills
I need money (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
Money don’t get everything, it’s true
But what it don’t get, I can’t use
I need money (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
That’s what I want (that’s what I want)
Money (that’s what I want)
Lots of money (that’s what I want)
Whole lot of money (that’s what I want)
Uh-huh (that’s what I want)
All I want (that’s what I want)
Whoa, yeah (that’s what I want)
Give me money (that’s what I want)
Oh, lots of money (that’s what I want)
All those lean greens, yeah (that’s what I want)
I got that, uh, that’s what I mean (that’s what I want)
All that I want (that’s what I want)
Whoa, yeah (that’s what I want)
Give me money, yeah
Songwriters: Berry Gordy Jr / Janie Bradford
There are all sorts of ways!
Enjoy!
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sunday, I will be reviewing the Canadian series, Degrassi High, which aired on CBC and PBS from 1989 to 1991! The series can be streamed on YouTube and Tubi
This week, the first season of Degrassi High comes to a close!
Episode 1.15 “Stressed Out”
(Dir by John Bertram, originally aired on February 13th, 1990)
The first season of Degrassi High comes to an end with an episode that once again establishes Caitlin as being the worst.
The school year is coming to a close and everyone is stressed about final exams. Michelle is taking speed to stay up and study. Normally, this would be a big deal but this episode only devotes a few scenes to it and we don’t even get a big dramatic meltdown on Michelle’s part. I mean, I guess it’s good that Michelle finally got a plotline that doesn’t revolve everyone being shocked about her dating BLT but why would you do a drug storyline without a meltdown?
The majority of this episode is taken up with Caitlin getting upset because Ms. Avery will not be working at Degrassi anymore. Under the impression that Ms. Avery has been fired, Caitlin passes around a petition. When Ms. Avery says she appreciates the support but that she’s actually the one who decided to quit, Caitlin freaks out (in much the same way that Michelle should have freaked out) and gets all upset and says that she’s not even going to go to the end-of-the-year school party.
Hey, Caitlin — IT’S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!
Seriously, Caitlin — Ms. Avery is an adult. She has every right to quit her job. Now, it does turn out that Avery quit because the school board wanted her to become a substitute teacher. Avery wants her own classroom. Caitlin is still upset. How can Ms. Avery be so selfish to abandon the one student who actually cares about whether or not she has a job or not? Avery really should have just told Caitlin to get a life but finally, Ms. Avery takes a job teaching at another school. So, Ms. Avery will get her own classroom and, even more importantly, she won’t have to deal with Caitlin anymore.
Whatever happened to Caitlin’s court case? Shouldn’t she be doing community service or something?
This finale was a bit of a letdown but it happens. Not every school year ends with something exciting happening. Next week, we start the second and final season of Degrassi High!
2010’s Bed & Breakfast is one of those Hallmark-y films that takes place at a B&B in a quaint little town.
Having recently been left by his actress wife, Jake (Dean Cain) is trying to open up a bed and breakfast, using a house that was left to him by a former employer. Helping Jake out is his brother, Peter (Jake Engvall), a member of law enforcement who not only enjoys drinking beer but also enjoys talking about beer as well. Juliana Paes plays Ana, the niece of the original owner of the house. Ana is from Brazil and she wants to sell the house because her brother is in debt to some local mobsters. But then Ana meets the handsome and single Jake and …. well, you already know what’s going to happen. This is one of those films where the familiarity is the point. You watch it because you know that Jake and Ana are going to fall in love and you know exactly how long it’s going to take for that to happen. Dean Cain is rugged. Juliana Paes is pretty. The town is lovely. It’s a sweet little film that you’ll forget about a few minutes after it ends.
Of course, these films always require a cameo or two. John Savage and Julia Duffy show up as a couple who stay at the B&B and who share a dance at the end of the film. Ted Lange is the judge who settles the issue of who actually owns the house. Eric Roberts shows up as a reviewer who stays at the B&B and decides that it’s a wonderful place that more than deserves a good review. Yay! I will say that it’s always interesting to see Roberts playing someone who is just a nice, polite guy. He doesn’t get to do it all that often. Eric Roberts doesn’t have much screentime in this film but he gets to be pleasant the entire time. It’s a nice change of pace.
Previous Eric Roberts Films That We Have Reviewed:
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Sundays, I will be reviewing Homicide: Life On The Street, which aired from 1993 to 1999, on NBC! It can be viewed on Peacock.
This week, Bayliss loses it!
Episode 3.7 “Happy To Be Here”
(Dir by Lee Bonner, originally aired on November 18th, 1994)
This week’s episode was depressing even by Homicide standards.
Felton’s wife is still missing. Felton confronts both Kay and Megan, convinced that they know something about it. Does it ever occur to Felton that maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t have so much trouble in his marriage if he wasn’t always stumbling around like hulking dunk, sweating through his shirt and smoking up a storm? Be the change, Felton. Be the change.
Sam Thorne, the journalist played by Joe Morton, is assassinated by a Colombian cartel. It turns out that his assassin was a teenager who agreed to do it in return for a new bike. Giardello is shaken by the death of his friend and there’s a wonderfully acted scene in which Giardello visits Sam’s daughter (Maggie Rush). This storyline served to remind the viewer that Yaphet Kotto, even if he spends most of the show in his office, really is the glue that holds this show together. He’s the heart and the moral soul of Homicide.
Meanwhile, Bayliss has gone from being the clean-cut rookie to being someone who appears to be on the verge of having a complete and total breakdown. He’s still seeing Emma Zoole and Lewis is still angry with him about it. Emma likes to make love in a coffin. Bayliss can accept that. Emma wants Bayliss to hit her and that pushes Bayliss over the edge. When he stops by a convenience store to pick up a six-pack of beer, he discovers that he’s a few pennies short. The clerk says it doesn’t matter. He can’t sell Bayliss the beer. Bayliss responds by drawing his gun and robbing the place! When the police arrive, Bayliss is sitting in his car and drinking a beer.
So, I guess Bayliss is going to prison now, right? No, not in Baltimore. Instead, Bayliss shows off his badge. When that doesn’t work, he calls Pembleton. Pembleton comes down to the store and gets the clerk to drop the charges in exchange for Bayliss serving as an unpaid security guard. At the end of the episode, Bayliss is sitting in front of that store and hopefully thinking about how close he came to being sent to prison.
This was a good episode, one that looked at the pressure that goes along with being exposed to the worst that humanity has to offer. Bayliss holding that store was a scene that probably should not have worked but it did, due to the performance of Kyle Secor. In a manner of minutes, Secor took Bayliss from being tired but friendly to being so angry that I was worried he was actually going to shoot the clerk. Not only did we see Bayliss’s dark side but we also saw Pembleton’s good side as he went out of his way to keep his partner from going to prison.
How much darker can things get in Baltimore? We’ll find out next week!
Today’s song of the day is the only instrumental tune to be banned from being played on the radio. Back in 1958, when Link Wray first released this song, it was felt that the title and the sound would promote juvenile delinquency and that the song had to be banned for the mental well-being of the nation’s youth. The radio stations must have made the right decision because we all know how peaceful the 60s turned out to be.
Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi and Peacock!
This week’s episode makes even less sense than usual.
Episode 3.12 “Howard Hemingway”
(Dir by Alan Erlich, originally aired on November 22nd, 1987)
Weird episode.
Howard Bannister notices how many of the store’s customers are also buying trashy romance paperbacks. He also notices how much Marlene and Edna enjoy reading them. Howard decides that he should write a book of his own and become a millionaire!
(Heh heh …. go tell any working writer about the idea of becoming a millionaire off of one book and see how they react.)
Howard struggles. He sits in his office and tries to write a book about a safari. Because this episode aired in the 80s, he uses a typewriter. Because I’ve worked as an administrative assistant, I immediately noticed that Howard was a terrible typist. Soon, the floor of his office is covered in crumpled papers. He just can’t find the right hook for his story. Edna points out that he’s never been on safari. All Howard knows about is running a grocery store.
And so Passion Aisle is born!
Howard writes a book based on Cobb’s and the people that he works with. Since he only appears to work with five other people, I’m a little bit surprised that the book appeared to be as long as it was. Somehow, Howard is able to talk a publisher into publishing his book. Howard doesn’t even have an agent so I’m curious how he pulled that off but anyway….
No one wants to buy the book! Howard finally ends up giving copies away at the store. Some of the customers read it and immediately figure out that the trampy cashier “Arlene” is based on Marlene. The employees at Cobb’s decide that, since the book is based on them, they deserve some of the money that Howard is making off of it. Howard agrees even though there’s absolutely no reason for Howard to have done so. Howard wrote the thing. The employees really didn’t do anything. Still, they get a 50/50 split….
Seriously, I don’t want to overanalyze this but it really bothers me that Howard finally managed to accomplish something on his own and his employees, rather than accepting that, immediately demanded that they be rewarded for his hard work. Just because you inspired someone to write a book or paint of picture or do anything else doesn’t mean that your entitled to financial compensation. Not even Canada has gone that communist yet. Howard should have stood his ground.
But, he didn’t. Everyone got a little bit of money and I assume that Howard is never going to write another book. That’s kind of sad. Howard’s been looking for an escape from Cobb’s since the show began. He finally got one and was immediately punished for his initiative. Poor Howard!