Tag Archives: Lew Horn

Retro Television Review: St. Elsewhere 4.9 “Sanctuary”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing St. Elsewhere, a medical show which ran on NBC from 1982 to 1988.  The show can be found on Daily Motion.

This week, Westphall finds something else to feel depressed about.

Episode 4.9 “Sanctuary”

(Dir by Eric Laneuville, originally aired on December 4th, 1985)

Dr. Ehrlich has been demoted to gynecology, the department he most fears. He even begs Dr. Caldwell to allow him to return to plastic surgery, but Caldwell has no sympathy for him. Caldwell tells Ehrlich that he’s a loser and that he’ll always be a loser.

Well, Ehrlich may be a loser, but he also helps deliver a baby in this episode and learns that he can actually get through the day without offending someone. Bobby Caldwell, on the other hand, makes a joke about Lucy’s breasts in front of a patient and ends up getting reported for sexual harassment. When Lucy points out to Auschlander that Caldwell’s statement was both demeaning and uttered in front of a patient, Caldwell argues that Lucy is taking things too personally and that he was just joking. (Ugh. Every woman has had a Bobby Caldwell in her life.) Auschlander asks Lucy to leave the room and then tells Bobby that if he ever makes another joke like that, he’ll be fired. While it’s good that Auschlander makes it clear that Bobby’s conduct was unprofessional, sending Lucy out of the room beforehand only leaves her feeling more isolated. Auschlander is willing to reprimand Caldwell, but only in private, a consideration that Bobby wasn’t willing to show Lucy.

Lucy is angry, and it doesn’t help that Nurse Rosenthal essentially says that Lucy only has herself to blame for being too flirtatious with the doctors in the past. Oh God, this episode was not easy for me to watch. I used to work as an administrative assistant. My boss was a good guy who always treated me with respect. (It undoubtedly helped that he was a good friend of my mom’s and we had more of a father/daughter relationship than a standard boss/employee relationship.) However, I lost track of the number of other men who would tell me that they appreciated it whenever I wore a skirt or who would hang out at my desk and watch whenever I had to lean forward for any particular reason. I would smile and say something silly in response because that just seemed like the easiest way to deal with things. The other women who worked in the building always told me that I should “dress down,” but I didn’t want to do that. I just wanted to be myself.

Meanwhile, Dr. Fiscus loses a patient, a homeless man (Mark Casella) who once helped Fiscus move. Before the man dies, he sees an Egyptian sarcophagus being X-rayed and comments on how people still remember the rulers of ancient Egypt but no one is going to remember him. After he dies, Fiscus and his girlfriend, X-ray technician Mona Polita (Leah Ayres), wrap the man’s body and put him in an empty sarcophagus.

Finally, Westphall’s new housekeeper, Morena (Edith Diaz), is rushed to the ER with back pain. With the help of Dr. Morrison (who speaks fluent Spanish as a result of attending a South American medical school), Westphall learns that Morena was tortured in her native El Salvador. As usual, Dr. Westphall makes Morena’s tragedy all about himself by using her as an example of why the hospital needs to adopt Westphall’s plans to reach out to the community.

The next day, Westphall snaps at the residents about their lack of community spirit. Fiscus finally snaps that he’s sick of being lectured by Westphall and leaves the room. Good for Fiscus! Seriously, Westphall’s self-righteousness has been unbearable this season. Just because Westphall can’t figure out how to communicate with his autistic son, he’s been making everyone else’s life miserable.

This was another rather sad episode of St. Elsewhere. There’s not much happiness to be found in St. Eligius. That said, Lucy’s storyline was touching and also a reminder that, in some ways, 2026 is not that different from 1985. And I was glad that the poor homeless man was given a burial fit for a king. If nothing else, Fiscus will never forget him.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 7.14 “Lady of the house/Mrs. Brandell’s Favorites”

Posted on by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984.  The show is once again on Tubi!

Justice for Tattoo!

Episode 7.14 “Lady of the House/Mrs. Brandell’s Favorites”

(Dir by Bob Sweeney, originally aired on February 25th, 1984)

This was one of the Fantasy Island episode that was not on my DVR.  However, now that the show is once again streaming in its entirety on Tubi, I was still able to watch it. Lucky me.

This is probably the worst episode of Fantasy Island that I’ve ever seen.

This episode gets off to a bad start with Mr. Roarke informing Lawrence that there will only be one guest with a fantasy this week.  That guest is Esther Brandell (Polly Bergen).  Whenever there’s only one guest and that guest is played by a middle-aged actress who was big in the 50s and the 60s, you know you’re about to spend an hour watching an hour of awkward melodrama that you’re supposed to excuse by saying, “She was great in Kisses For My President!”

Mrs. Brandell says that she’s a former sorority house mother who wants her three favorite sorority girls to be her bridesmaids at her wedding.  Actually, Mrs. Brandell was a former madam and the three “sorority girls” all worked for her.  Bebe (Lauren Tewes), Coleen (Randi Oakes), and Lynn (Shelley Smith) have all moved on and want to keep their past a secret.  Over the course of the episode, each will admit the truth to their current partner and each will realize that Mrs. Brandell really did protect and care about them.

This episode basically features the same scene over and over again.  Each of the girls works up the courage (or the anger) to admit that they were once a prostitute.  Their significant other reacts.  One guy tries to blackmail Mrs. Brandell.  Another reveals that he knew all along because “I’m an investigative reporter.”  Bebe’s idiot boyfriend (Dick Gautier) refuses to believe Bebe and insists that she sleep with another man for money so that he’ll be convinced.  What?  Bebe realizes that’s not her lifestyle anymore and she really does love her idiot boyfriend, the same one who pimped her out to some random guy on the Island.

And, through the whole thing, Polly Bergen delivers her lines in a voice that sounds like she just finished smoking a pack of cigarettes.  The truth of the matter is that Bergen is absolutely lousy in the role but the script is probably as much to blame as Bergen herself.  Every scene feels like it’s been cribbed from an old Barbra Stanwyck melodrama.  At the end of the episode, the vice cop (Robert Brown) who used to bust her shows up at the wedding.  “Everybody freeze!” he says.  Oh, thank God, everyone’s getting busted for overacting.  Oh wait — Mrs. Brandell (a widow) is marrying him!

The episode ends with the wedding, which would be touching if any of these characters were actually interesting.  Lawrence gives away the bride because I guess they had do something to justify paying Christopher Hewett’s salary.

This was not a good trip to the Island.  Is this season over yet?

Dick Tracy (1990, directed by Warren Beatty)

Posted on by Jedadiah Leland

The year is 1937 and “Big Boy” Caprice (Al Pacino) and his gang of flamboyant and often disfigured criminals are trying to take over the rackets.  Standing in their way is ace detective Dick Tracy (Warren Beatty), the yellow trench-wearing defender of the law.  Tracy is not only looking to take down Caprice but he and Tess Trueheart (Glenne Headly) are currently the guardians of The Kid (Charlie Korsmo), a young street kid who witnessed one of Caprice’s worst crimes.  Tracy’s investigation leads him through a rogue’s gallery of criminals and also involves Breathless Mahoney (Madonna), who has witnessed many of Caprice’s crimes but who also wants to steal Tracy’s heart from Tess.

Based on the long-running comic strip, Dick Tracy was a labor of love on the part of Warren Beatty.  Not only starring but also directing, Tracy made a film that stayed true to the look and the feel of the original comic strip (the film’s visual palette was limited to just seven colors) while also including an all-star cast the featured Madonna is an attempt to appeal to a younger audience who had probably never even heard of Dick Tracy.  When Dick Tracy was released, the majority of the publicity centered around Madonna’s participation in the film and the fact that she was dating Beatty at the time.  Madonna is actually probably the weakest element of the film.  More of a personality than an actress, Madonna is always Madonna no matter who she is playing and, in a film full of famous actors managing to be convincing as the members of Dick Tracy’s rogue gallery, Madonna feels out of place.  Michelle Pfeiffer would have been the ideal Breathless Mahoney.

It doesn’t matter, though, because the rest of the film is great.  It’s one of the few comic book films of the 90s to really hold up, mostly due to Beatty’s obvious enthusiasm for the material and the performances of everyone in the supporting cast who was not named Madonna.  Al Pacino received an Oscar nomination for playing Big Boy Caprice but equally good are Dustin Hoffman as Mumbles, William Forsythe as Flaptop, R.G. Armstong as Pruneface, and Henry Silva as Influence.  These actors all create memorable characters, even while acting under a ton of very convincing makeup.  I also liked Dick Van Dyke as the corrupt District Attorney.  Beatty knew audience would be shocked to see Van Dyke not playing a hero and both he and Van Dyke play it up for all its worth.  Beatty embraces the comic strip’s campiness while still remaining respectful to its style and the combination of Danny Elfman’s music and Stephen Sondheim’s songs provide just the right score for Dick Tracy’s adventures.  The film can be surprisingly violent at times but the same was often said about the Dick Tracy comic strip.  It wasn’t two-way wrist radios and trips to the Moon.  Dick Tracy also dealt with the most ruthless and bloodthirsty gangsters his city had to offer.

Dick Tracy was considered to be a box office disappointment when it was originally released.  (Again, you have to wonder if Beatty overestimated how many fans Dick Tracy had in 1990.)  But it holds up well and is still more entertaining than several of the more recent comic book movies that have been released.