What Lisa Watched Last Night #185: Did I Kill My Mother? (dir by David Bush)

Posted on June 24, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, along with Prescription For Danger, I watched Did I Kill My Mother? on Lifetime!

Why Was I Watching It?

I actually watched Did I Kill My Mother when it originally premiered, was back on May 12th. Unfortunately, at that time, I was suffering from some sinus and allergy problems that pretty much knocked me out for that entire month so I didn’t write a review. Fortunately, Lifetime was kind enough to give me a second chance at that review by rebroadcasting the film last night!

Thanks, Lifetime!

What’s It About?

At one time, Natalie Romero (Megan Park) had a great future. She was going to leave the small town where she grew up and she was going to go to law school! But then, one night, her father mysteriously died. Natalie’s mother, Laura (Alice Davis Johnson), became convinced that her husband was murdered by local mobsters and insisted on investigating the case even after the police announced that it was closed. As for Natalie, she started drinking and hanging out with losers like Ethan (Jordan Salloum).

One night, when Natalie comes home drunk from the local bar, she has just enough time for a very loud argument with her mother before she goes upstairs and passes out. When Natalie wakes up, she discovers that her mother has been murdered! Despite the fact that the chief of police (Dane Rhodes) is a family friend, Natalie quickly senses that Detective Monroe (Austin Highsmith) considers her to be the number one suspect.

Natalie must now not only solve two murders but also clear her name. The town is full of suspects. Everyone knows that Ethan was obsessed with Natalie and disliked her mom. There’s a true crime author (Stephen Colletti) with a shady past poking around. Even Natalie’s best friend (Karina Willis) seems to be awfully eager to tell Natalie what to say and do. And, of course, Natalie can’t remember what she did or didn’t do on the night of the murder. Could Monroe be correct? Could Natalie have murdered her own mother?

What Worked?

This was a really entertaining movie. Along with giving you two mysteries for the price of one, it also featured a memorable collection of potential murderers. While watching the film, it was easy to imagine that any one of them could have been the killer.

Out of the talented cast, Stephen Colletti really stood out. He played the struggling writer with just the right combination of rakishness and dorkiness. The enthusiasm that he brought to uncovering clues was a lot of fun to watch. Colletti’s best moment? When he commented that a recently deceased character was an “idiot.” “Sorry,” he tells the dead body, with such sincerity that you believe his regret.

The script was full of witty dialogue. This was one of those films where everyone — from the lead character to the most minor of rolls — had the gift of snark.

What Did Not Work?

It all worked! This was an entertaining Lifetime murder mystery!

“Oh my God! Just like me!” Moments

I related to the character of Natalie’s best friend, played by Karina Willis. Like her, I enjoy solving mysteries. When she started to excitedly explain what it meant when a person went to the funeral of someone who they were suspected of having killed, I was right there with her.

(She was right, too! The guilty party always comes to the funeral.)

Lessons Learned

Murders are more fun to solve when you work with your friends!

What Lisa Watched Last Night #184: Prescription For Danger (dir by Caroline Labrèche)

Posted on June 24, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I watched Prescription for Danger on Lifetime!

Why Was I Watching It?

Much like The Wrong Daughter, this was another Lifetime movie that I somehow missed when it originally aired. Lifetime was nice enough to rebroadcast it last night, which gave me a chance to get caught up!

What Was It About?

Imagine two people who appear to have it all.

On the one hand, you have Ivy (Joanne Kelly). Ivy is a smart and successful businesswoman. She’s driven, often to the point of distraction. She’s put her personal life on hold and it’s paid off with a lot of success at a young age. Of course, as a result, she’s still single. And she’s been suffering from terrible migraines ever since college. When she finally pushes herself too far, she collapses and finally has to go to the hospital.

And then there’s Dr. Mark Ryan (Shaun Benson). At first glance, he appears to be intelligent, kind, professional, and dedicated. Of course, there is a woman who is suing him but Dr. Ryan swears that she’s crazy. And Dr. Ryan has been fined in the past for ethical lapses but then again, who hasn’t?

When Dr. Ryan examines Ivy, he announces to her that she has brain cancer but that he has the perfect cure! But what if Ivy doesn’t have cancer? What if Dr. Ryan is lying to her and giving her placebos just because he’s a manipulative sociopath?

And, if that’s bad enough, what if Ivy finds herself falling in love with him?

What Worked?

Joanne Kelly and Shaun Benson both did a good job in the leading roles. Benson, who previously played another Lifetime psycho in Kept Woman, was convincing both as a caring doctor and a totally unhinged madman. You understood why Ivy was willing to trust the doctor and, at the same time, you couldn’t wait to see him get his final comeuppance.

Director Caroline Labrèche did a great job of visually putting us into Ivy’s mind, especially when she was on the verge of collapsing at the start of the film. As melodramatic as the plot was, Labreche actually told her story in a relatively low-key fashion, one that was certainly different from what we typically expect from a Lifetime movie.

What Did Not Work?

At the same time, the film’s relatively low-key approach was something of a double-edged sword. On the one hand, you had to appreciate the fact that the film was attempting to take its story seriously. At the same time, as a regular Lifetime viewer, I couldn’t help but regret that the film didn’t take the opportunity to go totally over-the-top. Maybe I’ve been spoiled by the Stalked By My Doctor films.

(Then again — and this is why you should probably ignore most critics — if the film had gone over-the-top, it’s likely that people online would have complained that it was just trying to be another Stalked By My Doctor. Ultimately, the only critic that matters is you, the viewer.)

“OMG! Just like me!” Moments

I related to Ivy, in both her drive to be successful and her hesitation about dealing with hospitals and doctors. If, God forbid, I was every told that I needed chemotherapy, I would have had much the same reaction as Ivy. Joanne Kelly did a good job of bringing her to life,

Lessons Learned

Trust no one, which seems to be a pretty common lesson to be learned from Lifetime films. If you didn’t already distrust doctors as a result of the Stalked By My Doctor films, you certainly will after Prescription for Danger. (Except, of course, for the doctor who I see for my ADD, because he is seriously a prince!)

Cleaning Out The DVR: Lethal Admirer (dir by Craig Goldstein)

Posted on June 24, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

I recorded Lethal Admirer off of Lifetime on April 15th.

My friends and I have long debated which episode of Boy Meets World is the worst.

My friend Jen has often said that the worst episode was the one where Eric wanted to adopt a kid and she has a pretty good point, there. Some others have said that the worst episode was the one where Cory acts like an immature jackass when his mom dares to give birth on a day that he wanted to spend exclusively with Topanga and, again, I think they have a valid point.

Speaking for myself. I’ve narrowed it down to two possibilities.

First off, there’s the episode where Shawn joins a cult and Cory starts grabbing him and going, “This is a hug, Shawn! THIS! THIS IS A HUG!” The other one is the episode where Cory and Topanga crash a complete stranger’s wedding and Cory makes their special day all about him.

You know which one I’m talking about. Cory and Topanga know no one at the wedding. The only reason that they’re there is so they can get ideas for the own wedding. Still, Cory feels the needs to stand up during the ceremony and give a lengthy speech about how creepily obsessed he is with his fiancée and how he hopes that the newlyweds will be as much in love with each other as Cory is with Topanga.

The worst thing about this scene is that everyone at the wedding is touched by Cory’s speech. Nobody says, “And you are?” No one questions why some strange teenager is making the ceremony all about himself. No one asks why Cory is suddenly the world’s authority on love. Add to that, beyond Cory being incredibly self-centered, it’s just an extremely awkward moment. I mean, it’s bad enough to crash someone’s wedding but then to interrupt with some halfassed speech about yourself? You feel embarrassed for Cory, for everyone at the wedding, and especially for Topanga.

Well, believe it or not, Lethal Admirer contains a scene that is just as thoroughly awkward as Cory’s wedding speech. This scene also takes place at a wedding. Unlike Cory and Topanga, Lloyd (Drew Seeley) is not crashing the wedding. He was actually invited to attend by his friend and former co-worker, Megan (Karissa Lee Staples). The only reason Megan invited Lloyd to come with her is because her boyfriend, Chris (Brian Ames), broke his leg when he fell off a ladder. Megan considers Lloyd to be a friend and even wants to set him up with her sister (Courtney Hope). However, Lloyd is convinced that Megan loves him. As Lloyd explains it, his mother has always told him that he has to take big chances and Lloyd does just that at the wedding reception.

And, oh my God! Anyone who has ever had a friend declare their love at the worst possible moment will be cringing with flashbacks!

Of course, it’s not just that Lloyd has no clue about how to socially interact with people. It’s also that Lloyd’s a little bit crazy. In fact, he’s just crazy enough to have killed both Megan’s former boyfriend and her current boss. Remember that ladder that Chris fell off of? Well, that was no accident. Nor was it an accident that, after Megan moved across the country, Lloyd suddenly showed up in her new city. Lloyd is obsessed with Megan and Megan, for whatever reason, is pretty much clueless until it’s too late.

It’s a typical Lifetime movie scenario but Lethal Admirer is distinguished by a script that makes the very wise decision not to take itself too seriously. It never becomes a full-blown comedy like A Deadly Adoption but the script of Lethal Admirer features enough one-liners and random nonsequiturs to indicate that the filmmakers were determined to have a little bit fun with the typical Lifetime formula. I especially liked the interactions between Megan and her sister. Their relationship rang true.

Also ringing true was the character of Lloyd, who was definitely strange but also just charming enough that you could legitimately accept the idea of Megan wanting to be his friend. Drew Seeley provided an indelible portrait of a nerd scorned in this film. His little smile when Megan assured him that he could pass for an intellectual hipster was both deeply creepy and kind of sweet at the same time.

Lethal Admirer was a good Lifetime flick. If nothing else, it should be shown to everyone as an example of what not to do at a wedding.

Cleaning Out The DVR: I Killed My BFF: The Preacher’s Daughter (dir by Seth Jarrett)

Posted on June 24, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

I recorded I Killed My BFF: The Preacher’s Daughter off of Lifetime on April 22nd.

Could you kill your BFF?

I’d like to think I could not. In fact, as of right now, I have at least six BFFs and I wouldn’t kill a single one of them. To be honest, I doubt that I’m physically capable of killing any of my BFFs. Four of them own guns, which would definitely give them an advantage over me. Way back when I was skipping school and shoplifting makeup, another one of my BFFs was training with the IDF. I wouldn’t even think of trying to kill her, largely because I love her, she’s like a sister to me, and I’m pretty sure she’s been taught a hundred different ways to stop me. So no, I would not kill any of my BFFs. And I wouldn’t kill any of my former BFFs, either. It’s not that I couldn’t, it’s just I imagine I’d be an obvious suspect and then there’s all the guilt and the damnation and all that.

However, there are apparently quite a few people in the world who are not only capable of killing their BFF but who have actually done it! There’s even a Lifetime show about it. I Killed My BFF always starts by detailing how wonderful the friendship was before the friends decided to commit murder. The identities of the murderer and the victim are not revealed until the final few minutes of the show so the whole point of watching an episode of I Killed My BFF basically amounts to spending 50 minutes of trying to guess who is going to snap first.

The show itself was so successful that it’s even led to a mini-movie franchise. The first I Killed My BFF film aired in 2015 and it was an instant classic. Now, three years later, we have a second I Killed My BFF film, The Preacher’s Daughter.

Who is the preacher’s daughter? Her name is Lily Adler (Megan West) and she seems like she’s perfectly happy being a leading member of her father’s (Joe Gretsch) congregation. She’s in charge of the youth ministry and she’s always very prim and proper. Little does the congregation suspect that Lily used to be a wild child who had an abortion when she was a teenager.

The congregation also does not know that Rev. Adler is estranged from his son, Jason (Matthew James Ballinger). After their mother commits suicide, Lily attempts to repair the relationship between her father and her brother but, instead, she just ends up spending a lot of time with Jason’s older girlfriend, Rae (Carly Pope). Soon, Lily is once again drinking and doing drugs. It’s not until Jason’s mysterious death that Lily turns on Rae and starts trying to recruit Rae’s teenage daughter, Scarlet (Katherine Reis), into the church.

It all leads to (you guessed it!) murder!

When it comes to The Preacher’s Daughter, it’s hard to avoid the fact that none of these people really seem to be BFFs. I mean, Lily and Rae do hang out with each other for a while but that’s mostly just because of Jason. And while Lily and Scarlet do become close, it’s debatable whether or not they could really be considered BFFs. If anything, it seems more like a mentor/protegé type of relationship.

But no matter! It was still fun trying to guess who would end up killing who. A sign of the film’s success is that you could easily imagine either Rae, Lily, or even Scarlet turning out to be the murderer. Megan West was memorably creepy in the role of Lily and there’s a baptism scene that deserves a place in the Hall of Fame of WTF Lifetime Moments. Joel Gretsch also does a good job as the charismatic but judgmental Rev. Adler and the film’s ending packs a nice punch.

I look forward to watching future installments of I Killed MY BFF with my BFFs. Hopefully, none of them will ever try to kill me…

Cleaning Out The DVR: Dangerous Seduction (dir by Jean-Francois Rivard)

Posted on June 24, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

I recorded Dangerous Seduction off of the Lifetime Movie Network on May 5th! It’s also known as The Queen of Sin.

So, here’s the thing:

Posy Pinkerton (Christa B. Allen) seems like she should have the perfect life. She’s in her 20s and she’s already engaged to a doctor! Add to that, she’s a talented artist who has an up-and-coming career as a medical illustrator! Seriously, she can make a heart so realistic that you half-expect it start pumping blood through a body!

However, things aren’t always as perfect as they seem. For one thing, Posy is terribly shy and repressed. She rarely goes out or has any fun. Her fiance is the type who turns down a night of wild sex so that he can go to the hospital and check on a patient. I mean, seriously — what type of doctor does that!? (Other than a doctor who doesn’t want to get sued for malpractice, of course…) Posy’s even too shy to really pursue her career. Her best friend and cousin, Laura (Amber Goldfarb), says that Posy needs to have at least one wild fling before she gets married but Posy…

Well, Posy actually kind of agrees, even if she won’t admit it.

Things get complicated after Posy and Laura are the two last people to see a woman who is murdered shortly after she jogs past them. For Laura, it means meeting the handsome and single Detective Dagliesh (Sergio Di Zio). Who cares if the murder gets solved as long as Dagliesh and Laura get together!? They’re a cute couple! As for Posy … well, Posy is now being followed but she doesn’t realize it.

When Posy meets Jack (Richard de Klerk), she is immediately charmed. Remember that one wild fling that Laura recommended? Jack appears to be that fling. Soon, Posy is giving into an alter ego that she created for herself, the so-called Queen of Sin.

What Posy doesn’t know is that Jack works for someone who knows a little bit about sin himself. Charlie (Marc Thibaudeau) is a millionaire who deals with his ennui by hiring Jack and Stella (Inga Cadranel) to capture sex slaves, all of whom are eventually murdered by Charlie once he tires of them….

So, needless to say, there’s a lot going on in Dangerous Seduction but, in the end, it all becomes a fairly standard Lifetime kidnapping film. That’s not a complaint, of course. Lifetime generally makes the best abduction films and Dangerous Seduction deserves some credit for trying to do something a little bit different from the genre. The film starts off as almost a Fifty Shades of Grey type of film, with Posy exploring her sexual fantasies with Jack and then it becomes a murder mystery before ultimately ending up as a “let’s-escape-from-a-mad-man’s-mansion” film.

It’s nicely done. Whether capturing the shadows of Charlie’s mansion or the stark loneliness of a fresh crime scene, the films always looks great. (The film’s cinematography is credited to Sergio Di Rosa.) The actors all do a good job. Though Posy, with her constant self-doubt, can be a bit difficult to take, Amber Goldfarb is likable and fun as Laura and the between-the-lines romance between her and Dagliesh is fun to watch.

Lifetime always reruns their films a few hundred times so keep an eye out for this one!

Gettin’ a Woody: EVERYTHING YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT SEX* (United Artists 1972)

Posted on June 23, 2018 by gary loggins

cracked rear viewer

*(but were afraid to ask)

Say what you will about Woody Allen (and I’m sure some of you will), but from 1969 to 1977 he wrote, directed, and starred in some of the laugh-out-loud funniest movies ever made (after that, things got a bit pretentious, and his output has been hit-or-miss far as I’m concerned). Allen’s inventive mind took Dr. David Reuben’s best-selling sex manual EVERYTHING YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT SEX (*but were afraid to ask) and turned it into a hilarious anthology that skewers not only societal mores and morals, but every segment parodies a different film genre.

Some are better than others, but each has something funny to offer. The first, “Do Aphrodisiacs Work?”, finds Woody as a medieval court jester whose lousy Bob Hope one-liners bomb with the King (Anthony Quayle). The randy jester is dying to enter the Queen’s (Lynn Redgrave) “royal chambers”, but…

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What Lisa Watched Last Night #183: The Wrong Daughter (dir by Ben Myerson)

Posted on June 23, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Last night, I watched The Wrong Daughter on the Lifetime Movie Network!

Why Was I Watching It?

I think I must have missed The Wrong Daughter when it originally premiered on Lifetime. Maybe I was out spying on the neighbors or something. Who knows? Fortunately, Lifetime always shows their movies about a hundred different times during the year so, last night, I got a chance to catch up!

What Was It About?

Kate (Cindy Busby) has a lot to deal with! Not only is she trying to open up her own restaurant but she and Joe (Jon Prescott) are desperate to start a family. In the aftermath of another failed IVF treatment, Kate promptly starts repainting the nursery and talking about how she could turn the room into an office. (Interestingly, they live in a pretty big house so I’m kind of surprised she didn’t have an office already.) However, Joe has a solution! Maybe Kate could try to track down the girl that she gave up for adoption 17 years ago!

Meanwhile, 18 year-old Samantha (Sydney Sweeney) is just about to get kicked out of her group home. Abandoned by her mother when she was born, Samantha has never been adopted. Why not? Well, it might have something to do with Samantha being slightly psychotic. And while you may be thinking that Samantha is probably Kate’s long lost daughter, she’s not! However, her roommate is! When Samantha runs away and steals Danica’s (Sierra Pond) laptop, she discovers a message from Kate, announcing that she’s Danica’s mother and inviting Danica to come see her.

Soon, Samantha is at Kate’s restaurant, dressed demurely, claiming to be Danica, and working her way into Kate and Joe’s life. Meanwhile, the real Danica just wants her laptop back. Samantha, however, is happy being Danica and is willing to do anything — from bribing an old homeless woman to pretend to be the head of the group home when Kate calls to murdering anyone who turns their back on her — to remains so.

What Worked?

This was a pretty good example of the “killer imposter” genre of Lifetime films. Movies like this pretty much live and die based on the performance of the imposter and Sydney Sweeney did a good job playing the duplicitous Samantha. It was especially fun to watch her switch back and forth between being demure Danica and murderous Samantha.

What Did Not Work?

How naive can one person be? That’s kind of the question that I had to ask about Kate, who was both a savvy businesswoman and yet somehow was easily fooled by even the most obvious of Samantha’s lies. As much fun as it was to watch Kate get fooled over the phone by a crazy homeless woman, it was still hard not to wonder how that could have possibly happened in the first place.

“OMG! Just like me!” Moments

From the minute Samantha first climbed through the window of her group home, I started having flashbacks. That’s the same way that I used to sneak out of the house. When you’re growing up in the suburbs, it helps to be a good climber.

Lessons Learned

Protect your laptop with you life.

Four Star Fun: LIBELED LADY (MGM 1936)

Posted on June 21, 2018 by gary loggins

cracked rear viewer

Jean Harlow ! Spencer Tracy ! William Powell ! Myrna Loy ! Four top stars at the top of their game shining bright in LIBELED LADY, a screwball comedy directed by Jack Conway with that trademark MGM gloss. Despite the zany improbability of the script by Maurine Watkins, Howard Emmett Rogers, and George Oppenheimer, the crackling, witty dialog gives all four stars (and supporting actor Walter Connolly) plenty of good material.

Here’s the plot: rich heiress Connie Allenbury (Loy) is suing the New York Evening Star for printing a story about her being a husband stealer. Her price: five million! Editor Warren Haggerty (Tracy), after once again blowing off his nuptials to long-time flame Gladys Benton (Harlow), recruits ex-reporter and frenemy Bill Chandler (Powell) in a crazy scheme involving marrying him off to Gladys (and is she pissed!), hop an ocean liner to London, and return with Connie, using his…

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Insomnia File #36: Punchline (dir by David Seltzer)

Posted on June 21, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

What’s an Insomnia File? You know how some times you just can’t get any sleep and, at about three in the morning, you’ll find yourself watching whatever you can find on cable? This feature is all about those insomnia-inspired discoveries!

Last night, if you were up at 12 midnight and couldn’t get to sleep, you could have turned over to Movies TV and watched the 1988 film, Punchline.

Sally Field is Lilah, a New Jersey housewife who, in between getting her children ready for school and helping her husband (John Goodman) throw dinner parties, is pursuing a career as a stand-up comedian. Everyone says that she has a lot of stage presence but she struggles with her material. She’s even resorted to buying jokes from a seedy man who hangs out in a grimy diner.

Tom Hanks is Steve Gold, the youngest member of a family of doctors. When we first meet Steve, he’s getting kicked out of medical school for cheating on an exam. That’s probably for the best, though. Steve doesn’t want to be a doctor. He wants to make people laugh! Every night, he performs at a comedy club known as the Gas Station. Audiences love him almost as much as he hates himself.

Together … they solve crimes!

No, actually, they don’t. I wish they had but they don’t. Instead, in the tradition of A Star is Born, Steve ends up mentoring Lilah and helping her develop her own voice as a comedian. Lilah attempts to balance her loyality to her family with her friendship with Steve. It’s not always easy, largely because Steve isn’t exactly emotionally stable. On stage, Steve may be in control but offstage, he’s frequently selfish and self-destructive. Complicating things is the fact that, even as he watches her talent threaten to eclipse his own, Steve thinks he might be falling in love with Lilah.

Punchline is an uneven movie, largely due to the fact that, while one role is perfectly cast, another one most definitely is not. Not surprisingly, Tom Hanks is believable as a stand-up comedian. It’s not just that he’s obviously comfortable on the comedy club stage. Hanks also shows that he knows how to tell a joke. To put it simply, he has good timing. As played by Tom Hanks, you can look at Steve Gold and imagine people actually paying money for him to make them laugh.

But then you’ve got Sally Field. At no point is Sally Field believable as a stand-up comedian. That’s not so much a problem at the beginning of the film when Field is supposed to an inexperienced amateur. But, as the film progresses, we’re asked to believe that Lilah could conceivably win a spot on television over Hanks and there’s nothing about Field’s performance that suggests that would be possible. When we laugh at Sally Field’s jokes, it’s because she’s Sally Field and she’s talking about multiple orgasms. However, the comedy club audience doesn’t know that she’s Sally Field. Instead, they just know that she’s a comedian who has absolutely no timing.

Much like The Comedian and the Showtime TV series I’m Dyin’ Up Here, Punchline is one of those films that really goes overboard with the audience reaction shots. The only thing worse than listening to an unfunny comedian is then being assaulted by a shot or the sound of an audience dying of laughter. If someone’s not funny, showing some random guy doing spit take isn’t going to help. One thing that directors rarely seem to take into account is that laughter is rarely neat. It’s rare that a huge group of people both start and stop laughing at the exact same moment. There’s usually a stray chuckle or two to be heard, both before and after the punchline has been delivered. Even Tom Hanks, who actually is funny in the movie, is sabotaged by one scene where a group of patients at a hospital are way too amused by his act.

The film’s a bit too long and it takes its dramatic moments way too seriously but it’s almost worth watching for Tom Hanks. Hanks plays a real bastard in Punchline but you still care about Steve because he’s a likable bastard. As you watch the film, you hope Steve becomes a star even if he doesn’t really deserve it. I mean, he’s Tom Hanks!

Previous Insomnia Files:

The TSL’s Grindhouse: Deceiver (dir by Jonas Pate and Josh Pate)

Posted on June 19, 2018 by Lisa Marie Bowman

I have long contended that the most annoying serial killer of all time was Paul Michael Stephani, a resident of Minneapolis who killed three women in 1980.

Stephani was known as The Weepy-Voiced Killer. (Even his nickname was annoying.) Whenever Stephani committed a murder, he would promptly call 911 and confess while sobbing. As you might expect would happen to someone who was enough of a dumbass to call the police right after murdering someone, Stephani was eventually captured and convicted. Sentenced to 40 years, Stephani died of cancer while in prison and nobody misses him.

Unfortunately, because all of Stephani’s 911 calls were recorded, he’s recently become a very popular subject for true crime shows. It’s not there’s anything particularly interesting about Stephani’s crimes. It’s just that it’s easy (and cheap) to build a show around the sound of him whining on the phone. As someone who probably spends too much time watching true crime realty television, I’ve had to listen to Stephani’s voice more than anyone should ever have to. Making it even worse, there’s currently a show called Evil Calls, which uses a recording of Stephani in its commercials. I’ve actually stopped watching Investigation Discovery just because I’ve gotten so sick of hearing that loser whining, “Please don’t talk, just listen… I’m sorry I killed that girl. I stabbed her 40 times…”

However, the Stephani tapes do provide one valuable service. The sound of Stephani’s pathetic voice reminds us that most serial killers are not the urbanely witty and intelligent figures that we’ve gotten used to seeing in the movies. Most real-life killers are whiny losers who kill for very basic reasons and who are stupid enough to call 911 and confess. Movie killers are a different breed all together.

Take the 1997 mystery Deceiver, for instance.

In Deceiver, Renee Zellweger plays a world weary prostitute. We only see her in flashbacks, largely because she was murdered before the film’s opening scene. Her name was Elizabeth, which brings to mind Elizabeth Short, the legendary Los Angeles murder victim who is better known as the Black Dahlia. Much like the real-life Black Dahlia, Elizabeth’s body was cut into two pieces and left in a park. (According to the film’s imdb trivia section, Elizabeth was also named after Elizabeth Loftus, a psychologist who pioneered the study of false memories.)

Suspicion immediately falls on James Walter Wayland (Tim Roth). The youngest son of a wealthy and powerful South Carolina family, Wayland is an infamous alcoholic. Wayland admits that he knew Elizabeth. He even took Elizabeth with him to a fancy party, all the better to offend his parents. Wayland may be a black-out drunk with a history of erratic behavior but he also swears that he didn’t kill Elizabeth.

Two detectives are determined to trick Wayland into confessing. Detective Edward Kennesaw (Michael Rooker) is a respected veteran, the type of detective who can get a confession out of almost anyone. His partner is Detective Philip Braxton (Chris Penn), who is a bit less impressive. As we’re informed early in the film, Braxton graduated at the bottom of his high school class and has been waiting for a promotion for quite some time.

From the minute that Kennesaw and Braxton start to interrogate Wayland, it becomes obvious that Wayland is hardly your typical murder suspect. He’s certainly more impressive than the Weepy-Voiced Killer. He’s witty. He’s smart. He’s cocky. He admits to being an alcoholic and to suffering from black outs and seizures but he also claims that, unlike every other man who Elizabeth dealt with, he actually cared about her. Wayland also reveals that he knows some details about Kennesaw and Braxton. He knows about Kennesaw’s troubled marriage to a woman (Rosanna Arquette) who has a history of cheating on him. He knows that Braxton is in debt to a local bookie (Ellen Burstyn). And, as the interrogation continues, Wayland starts to suggest that one of the interrogators is hiding an even darker secret.

Deceiver‘s a frequently fascinating film to watch, even if it’s not always easy to follow. If there’s any film that would seem to demand multiple viewings, it’s this one. The majority of the movie takes place in one darkened room and directors Joan and Josh Pate do a wonderful job capturing the claustrophobia of that setting. (Fortunately, there’s enough flashbacks to keep the film from getting too stagey.) Roth, Rooker, and Penn all give intensely stylized performances. They may not feel realistic but they fit in perfectly with the fever dream atmosphere of the film. Roth, in particular, gives a performance that is both mannered and intriguing. It even feel appropriate that his Southern accent is in no way convincing. It just makes sense that Wayland wouldn’t sound like anyone else in the world.

It’s a heavily stylized film, full of odd dialogue and skewed camera angles. It’s a film that often feels like a journey right to the center of an extremely twisted mind. (Of course, the movie is designed so that you’re never quite sure whose mind you’ve entered.) There’s nothing realistic about it but that’s okay. It’s certainly preferable to watching a movie about The Weepy-Voiced Killer.