Retro Television Reviews: The Bait (dir by Leonard J. Horn)


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Sundays, I will be reviewing the made-for-television movies that used to be a primetime mainstay.  Today’s film is 1973’s The Bait!  It  can be viewed on YouTube!

Tracey Fleming (Donna Mills) is the widow of a cop and an undercover detective herself.  Unfortunately, her superior, Captain Maryk (Michael Constantine), is not convinced that Tracey has what it takes to be in a dangerous situation and, as a result, Tracey spends most of her time riding the bus and busting perverts and low-level drug dealers.  When four woman are raped and murdered by the same serial killer, Tracey writes up a report on what she thinks is motivating the killer.  Captain Maryk is, at first, skeptical about Tracey’s claim that the killer is fueled by a puritanical rage but, when it turns out that the killer has been wiping off his victims’s lipstick (just as Tracey speculated that he was), Maryk starts to think that Tracey might have something to offer the investigation.

Tracey becomes the bait in an operation to lure out the killer.  Leaving behind her son and her mother, Tracey moves into an apartment in the neighborhood that is believed to be the center of the killer’s activities.  Tracey is given a job as a survey taker and soon, she’s walking around the neighborhood and asking random men for their opinions on current events and women’s liberation.  A local waitress (Arlene Golonka) recognizes Tracey as a detective but Tracey lies and say that she’s no longer with the force.  When the killer makes the waitress his next victim, Tracey becomes even more determined to capture him but will she able to get Marsyk and the rest of the force to give her the room to investigate the murders?

This may sound like an intriguing whodunit but, for some reason, The Bait reveals early on that the murderer is a bus driver named Earl Stokely (played, in a very early performance, by William Devane).  There’s really nothing to be gained by revealing the killer’s identity as early as the film does.  Perhaps if the film was split between scenes of Tracey investigating the neighborhood and Earl stalking Tracey, that would have generated some sort of suspense but, with the exception of one bus ride, Tracey and Earl barely even interact before he comes after her at the film’s end.  Devane does give a good performance as a homicidal lunatic but, when viewed today, it’s impossible to watch him in this film without spending most of the time thinking, “Hey, that’s the usually Kennedyesque William Devane, playing a killer bus driver!”

I was not surprised to learn that The Bait was intended to be a pilot for a weekly television series that would have followed the future investigations of Tracey Fleming.  Donna Mills was likable in the lead role and she had a good chemistry with the other actors playing her colleagues so it’s easy to imagine a series in which Tracey solved a new case every week while Marsyk continually underestimated her.  Ultimately, though, that series never happened and The Bait would be the sole televised adventure of Detective Tracey Fleming.

4 Shots From 4 Films: Special Edgar G. Ulmer Edition


4 Or More Shots From 4 Or More Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!

119 years ago, on this date, the great director Edgar G. Ulmer was born in what is today the Czech Republic.  It’s time for….

4 Shots From 4 Edger G. Ulmer Films

The Black Cat (1934, dir by Edgar G. Ulmer, DP: John J. Mescall)

Detour (1945, dir by Edgar G. Ulmer, DP: Benjamin H, Kline)

The Man From Planet X (1951, dir by Edgar G. Ulmer, DP: John L. Russell)

Beyond The Time Barrier (1960, dir by Edgar G. Ulmer, DP: Meredith Nicholson)

Lisa Marie’s Week In Television: 9/10/23 — 9/16/23


Being on vacation this week, I again only watched a small amount of television.  Here’s a few thoughts on what I did watch.

Big Brother 25 (24/7, CBS and Paramount Plus)

I wrote about Big Brother here!

Degrassi Junior High (YouTube)

I watched the first two episodes of this Canadian show on Saturday, in preparation for a future series of reviews.

Dr. Phil (YouTube)

My mind was racing on Sunday morning so, around 3 in the morning, I attempted to calm it and ease myself into sleep by putting on an episode of Dr. Phil as background noise.  Dr. Phil was talking to the daughter of a country music drummer.  She was addicted to drugs and convinced that she was being stalked by strangers.  It didn’t sound like Phil did that much good.

On Monday morning, I watched an episode featuring the creator of Jilly Juice.  “Jilly Juice can cure cancer, grow back limbs, and reverse homosexuality!” Jillian happily announced about her salt-filled concoction before adding, “No, I’m not a doctor or scientist!”  An actual doctor revealed that Jilly Juice actually caused explosive diarrhea.  At one point, someone in the audience ran up on the stage and was grabbed by security.  It made for a bizarre 43 minutes.

On Wednesday morning, I re-watched the classic episode in which two crazy women, Vicky and Darlene, accused a totally innocent woman of running a fake GoFundMe page.  Darlene eventually saw the error of her ways but Vicky was a lost cause.

Fantasy Island (YouTube)

I wrote about Fantasy Island here!

The Hitchhiker (YouTube)

This week, I checked out a few episodes of this Canadian anthology series for a future set of reviews.

The Love Boat (Paramount Plus)

I wrote about The Love Boat here!

Night Flight (Night Flight Plus)

On Friday night and Saturday morning, I watched an episode about music videos and songs that centered around money.  This was followed by a profile of Billy Idol.

South Central (YouTube)

I wrote about South Central here!

The Steve Wilkos Show (YouTube)

My mind was racing on Sunday morning so, around 4 in the morning, I attempted to calm it and ease myself into sleep by putting on an episode of Steve Wilkos as background noise.  I was really tired and out-of-it so I’m not sure what exactly was going on but Steve sure was yelling at a lot of people.

T. and T. (Tubi)

I wrote about T. and T. here!

Welcome Back Kotter (Tubi)

I wrote about Welcome Back Kotter here!

Yes, Prime Minister (Monday Morning, PBS)

Fresh from an uneventful summit in Washington, a jet-lagged Prime Minister Hacker decide it was time to go on television and announce his Grand Design, which would include the return of conscription.  Fortunately, Sir Humphrey was able to manipulate a few polls and the opinions of the other members of the cabinet and the Prime Minister decided that it would perhaps be better to go with a speech that announced (and said) nothing.  The highlight of this episode was Hacker practicing for the broadcast.  Paul Eddington perfectly captured the character’s mix of earnestness and self-importance.  Hacker truly wants to be the best prime minister that he can be but he also doesn’t want to say anything that could run the risk of damaging his future political prospects.  Early in the episode, he was stunned when Bernard explained to him that, as Prime Minister, he was really only required to work seven hours a week.  By the end of the episode, Hacker seemed to be much more comfortable with the idea.

Retro Television Reviews: Welcome Back Kotter 2.7 “Sweathog, Nebraska Style” and 2.8 “Sadie Hawkins Day”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC  from 1975 to 1979.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Julie’s sister shows up and Juan Epstein falls in love.

Episode 2.7 “Sweathog, Nebraska Style”

(Dir by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on November 11th, 1976)

Gabe tells Julie about his Uncle Oscar, who was harassed one day by three bikers and who responded by “driving over three motorcycles in the parking lot.”

Unfortunately, Julie is not really interested in jokes this week.  Her teenage sister, Jenny (Susan Pratt), suddenly shows up in Brooklyn and explains that she has left Nebraska because she had a fight with her longtime boyfriend, Roger Abernathy.  Julie insists that Jenny attend classes at Buchanan High but is horrified when Jenny promptly starts to date Juan Epstein!  Julie even goes up to the school to complain to the principal, Mr. Lazarus, about her sister dating a Sweathog.  (Never mind, of course, that Julie herself married a former Sweathog.)  This episode also establishes that the never-seen Mr. Lazarus is apparently best friends with Juan Epstein.

Jenny finally agrees to return to Nebraska but just because Epstein is planning on going back with her.  Not even Barbarino and Freddie dressing up as farmers and Horshack putting on a cow outfit can convince Epstein to stay in New York.  But then Roger Abernathy calls from Nebraska, apologizes for arguing with Jenny, and Jenny dumps Epstein and heads back home alone.

After Jenny leaves, Gabe tells Julie about his uncle SitDownThere Kotter, who got that name because of the time he stood up in a movie theater and everyone yelled, “Hey, sit down there!”

“That is the worst joke I’ve ever heard in my entire life,” Julie replies.  Gabe looks sincerely hurt.

Actually, Julie doesn’t come across particularly well in this episode, flat out announcing that Juan Epstein is not good enough for her sister and basically acting like the biggest snob in Brooklyn.  It’s hard not to feel bad for Epstein, who seems to have genuine feelings for Jenny but who gets rather abruptly dumped at the last minute.  For all the talk about how moving to Nebraska would be a strange thing for Epstein to do, it probably would have also been a good thing for him.  He would be free of his reputation for “being most likely to take a life” and he could start his own life all over again.  In the end, though, Jenny abandons him and returns to Roger.  According to the IMDb, this is Jenny’s only appearance on Welcome Back Kotter, so I’m going to assume that things went well for her back in Omaha.

Let’s move on.

Episode 2.8 “Sadie Hawkins Day”

(Dir by Bob LaHendro, originally aired on November 18th, 1976)

Gabe tells Julie about his cousin Shermie, who didn’t start talking until he was 9 years old.  Shermie’s first words were “cereal bowl.”

It’s time for the Sadie Hawkins Day Dance at Buchanan High!  Barbarino is scandalized by the idea of girls asking out boys.  “You know when girls should be able to ask us out?” Barbarino tells Horshack, “When they can get us in …. trouble.”  Barbarino does, however, give Horshack some advice on how to get a date.  His hair should always look like it’s been dried by the wind.  Horshack should always use the “Barbarino stance,” which is defined as looking like you don’t care one way or the other. Barbarino sings his Ba-Ba-Barbarino song while showing Horshack how to relax.  The audience loves it.

Barbarino is not the only person who has an issue with Sadie Hawkins Day.  Mr. Woodman hides out in Gabe’s class and pretends to be a student in order to prevent Ms. Fishbeck from asking him out.  Gabe tells Woodman that no one is going to mistake him for a Sweathog.

“Hi there,” Woodman replies, doing his best Freddie “Boom Boom” Washington impersonation.

Eventually, Ms. Fishbeck does manage to track down Mr. Woodman, hiding in the teacher’s lounge and jumping out of a cupboard.  Barbarino, however, is less lucky than either Woodman or Fishbeck.  With the day of the dance rapidly approaching, Barbarino doesn’t have a date!  Barbarino is so self-absorbed that he doesn’t even realize when someone is trying to work up the courage to ask him out.  Later, when one girl does find the courage to ask Barbarino to the dance, Barbarino turns her down because he doesn’t want anyone to learn that he didn’t get a date until the day before the dance.  Gabe points out that Barbarino’s actions don’t make any sense.  “It’s not easy being a living legend,” Barbarino explains.

Despite not having a date, Barbarino does show up at Buchanan High on the night of the dance.  However, instead of joining everyone in the courtyard, he decides to sit in Gabe’s classroom.  Gabe finds him in the room and starts to tell Barbarino a story about his time as a student at Buchanan High.  “No more stories!” Barbarino begs before heading down to the courtyard.  Barbarino confesses to the other Sweathogs that he doesn’t have a date.  However, Judy Borden (Helaine Lembeck), making her first appearance since the end of the first season, reveals that she doesn’t have a date either.  Quickly adopting the Barbarino Stance, Barbarino becomes Judy’s date.  Everyone dances and, even though we’re supposed to laugh at Barbarino ending up with the loud and obnoxious Judy, they actually make a really cute couple.

As the dance wraps up, Gabe tells Julie about his Uncle Atlas, who used to play handball with a guy named Morty.

This episode worked largely due to the performance of John Travolta, who does a good job of portraying both Barbarino’s well-meaning stupidity and his (often hidden) sensitivity.  On the one hand,  Barbarino had no one to blame but himself.  On the other hand, the scene where gazed out the classroom window at all of his friends having fun was actually a little heart-breaking.  Personally, I hope things work out for Barbarino and Judy.  They’re a great couple!

Next week: Horshack wants to become a boxer!

Live Tweet Alert: Join #ScarySocial for Meander!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, at 9 pm et, Tim Buntley will be hosting #ScarySocial!  The movie?  2021’s Meander!

If you want to join us this Friday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 9 pm et, and use the #ScarySocial hashtag!  I’ll be there tweeting and I imagine some other members of the TSL Crew will be there as well.  It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.

Meander is available on Prime!

See you there!

A Blast From The Past: Ace Hits The Big Time (dir by Robert C. Thompson)


Made in 1985 for CBS, Ace Hits The Big Time is a seriously strange little film.

It tells the story of Horace Hobart (Rob Stone, a likable actor), a 16 year-old kid from New Jersey who has just transferred to a new high school in New York.  He’s paranoid about going to his new school because it’s supposedly populated by gang members.  The school is so notorious for gang activity that the members of the gang even make an appearance on the front page of the paper of record, The New York Freaking Times!  Looking at the newspaper makes Horace Hobart so paranoid that he has musical fantasies in which the members of a gang known as the Purple Falcons surround him, start singing, and then beat him up while doing an interpretive dance.

Horace does eventually find the courage to go to his new high school but he insists on calling himself “Ace,” he wears a jacket with a fearsome dragon embroidered on the back of it, and he wears an eye patch because he’s got …. ewwww …. pink eye.  (Remember when Bob Costas got pink eye at the Olympics and traumatized thousands of viewers by insisting on going on the air every night and talking about snowboarding while struggling to keep his eye from popping out of its socket?  Those were crazy times!)  Ace looks so tough that the real Purple Falcons mistake him for being an associate of a notorious New Jersey gang (no, not the Sopranos) and they recruit him to be a member of their gang.  Ace is so convincing as a tough guy that a film crew decides to use him and his friends as extras in a movie!  (Interestingly, the director is really involved in picking and working with the extras.  There’ll be no second unit crap for Ace and the Purple Falcons!)  Unfortunately, another gang insists on trying to make the Purple Falcons look bad.  Fortunately, Ace is able to defuse the tension by baking a cake.  What?

This is like the dorkiest version of West Side Story ever made and I can’t really figure out what the message is supposed to be.  On the one hand, Ace is totally paranoid about any sort of gang violence and goes out of his way to try to prevent a gang war.  On the other hand, even before Ace shows up and starts quoting John Lennon, neither one of the show’s gangs are particularly violent or even intimidating.  The Purple Falcons are pretty much impossible to take seriously because they’re called “the Purple Falcons.”  (They all wear purple, as well.  I guess some other gang had already claimed all the cool falcon colors.)  They really don’t do any sort of “gang” stuff.  Instead, they eat a lot of pizza and appear in a movie.  That sounds like a pretty good deal, actually.  With its mix of dorky humor, random dance numbers, and “tough” gang talk, this is one of those old time capsules that simply has to be seen to be believed.

And here it is!

AMV Of The Day: Time of Our Lives (Ace Attorney)


As I prepare to return from my vacation to the hard but returning work of putting together this year’s horrorthon, this Ace Attorney AMV feels appropriate.

Anime: Ace Attorney

Song: Time Of Our Lives by Chawki

Creator: Ace Gavinners (as always, please consider subscribing to the creator’s channel.  A lot of hard work goes into making an amv!)

Past AMVs of the Day

Retro Television Reviews: T and T 1.11 “Junkyard Blues” and 1.12 “Killing Time”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a new feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing T. and T., a Canadian show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990.  The show can be found on Tubi!

This week, Amy loses her car and her mind!

Episode 1.11 “Junkyard Blues”

(Dir by Dan McCutcheon, originally aired on March 21st, 1988)

“In this episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Amy’s car goes missing and so does Amy.  And I finally get my day in court!”

Amy is not having a good day.  She’s running later for court so she parks her car in a no-parking zone.  When she gets to court, she discovers that she forgot to bring an important file. Fortunately, the judge delays the start of the trial until Amy is prepared to proceed.  (Canadian judges are super nice!)  T.S. Turner tells Amy not to worry.

“Even good guys have a bad day!” he tells her.

Amy’s day is just about to get worse because, upon leaving the courthouse, she discovers that her car has been towed!  She goes from lot to lot, trying to find who towed her car but everyone tells her the same thing.  None of them towed a ’78, black VW convertible.  Amy tracks down the only witness to the car being taken, a 14 year-old named Sydney (Tara Strong).  Sydney is an aspiring journalist and she declares that Amy’s car getting stolen “could be the story that I’ve been waiting for!”

Amy finally returns to the office and, after snapping at administrative assistant Sophie, Amy says, “Pokey’s been stolen!”

“Why would any want to steal Pokey?” Sophie asks.

“It’s a classic!  They just don’t make cars like that anymore!” Amy shouts.

“Easy, Amy,” T.S. says, “If it’s stolen, I’ll find it for you.”

Amy, however, is determined to find the car herself.  T.S. objects and points out that he’s the private investigator and that Amy is the attorney who is due in court on several important matters.  In a move that would get an American lawyer disbarred, Amy tells T.S. to handle all of her court stuff while she looks for her car.  She then thinks that she sees Pokey being driven past the office so she runs outside and chases after it, yelling, “That’s my car!”

Somehow, 14 year-old Sydney figures out that Amy’s car has been taken to a chop shop.  While Amy takes an adolescent that she barely knows into a potentially deadly situation, T.S. Turner goes to court and plays the role of lawyer.  Fortunately, he’s able to get yet another continuance, which is a bit anticlimactic when you consider the potential of Mr. T playing someone pretending to be an attorney.

While T.S. potentially ruins her client’s life, Amy and the teenage girl who she has known for less than a day break into a criminal-controlled junkyard so that they can search for her car.  As I watched Amy and Sydney sneak around the auto yard, I found myself wondering if Sydney had parents and if they knew that she was putting her life at risk to help an attorney find a VW convertible named Pokey.

Fortunately, T.S. gets out of court in time to head down to the junkyard, toss around the car thieves, and help Amy rescue her car from being smashed.  Unfortunately, even after knocking out the thieves (“Goodnight, brother,” T.S. says.), T.S. is still not able to prevent Amy from accidentally destroying her car while trying to figure out how to lower it from the junkyard crane.

“It’s okay, Amy,” T.S. says, “So what if you’re not a good detective?”

“It was just a car,” Sydney says.

“THERE’S NO OTHER CAR LIKE THAT IN THE WORLD!” Amy yells at the teenager who risked her life to help a total stranger.

Presumably because he doesn’t want to have to spend the rest of his life listening to Amy complain about her car, T.S. buys Amy a new black VW convertible.

In the past, I’ve wondered why this show usually only focuses on one of the T’s.  Now I understand that it’s because Amy Taler, the other T, is an incredibly annoying character who will risk other people’s lives and not even say thank you afterwards.  This episode featured too many scenes of Amy yelling about her car and not enough scenes of T.S. gruffly telling people to stay out of his way.  I mean, I love my car too but I’m not going to force a stranger to break into a chop shop with me to search for it.  I’d probably ask my sisters to do it.

Anyway, let’s move on.

Episode 1.12 “Killing Time”

(Dir by Dan McCutcheon, originally aired on March 21st, 1998)

“On this week’s episode,” Mr. T tells us, “Amy and I get put on full alert when an escaped killer come back in town, seeking revenge.”

Years ago, Joe Nichols (played by Geza Kovacs, a favorite of David Cronenberg’s) was convicted of murdering his ex-wife’s new husband.  The key testimony in the case against him was given by his five year-old daughter, Wendy (Mairon Bennett).  And who was the prosecutor who sent Joe to prison?  Amy Taler!

Yes, apparently Amy was prosecutor before she went into private practice.  It’s kind of interesting how the show is continually revealing contradictory details about Amy’s past, almost as if the show’s writers were making up the character as they went along.  Amy tells T.S. that the Nichols case was the last she prosecuted before switching sides.  Joe Nichols was a viscous killer and he needed to be taken off the streets so I’m not sure why the Nichols case would be the one that would lead to Amy resigning from the prosecutor’s office.

Anyway, Joe escapes from prison and returns to whatever Canadian city T and T is supposed to take place in.  The cops think that Joe is coming for his daughter but T.S. thinks that Joe is actually after Amy and decides to stake out Amy’s apartment so that he can beat up Joe when he shows up.  And that’s what happens.

Seriously, that was pretty much the entire episode.  That 30-minute run time pretty much guaranteed that T and T would always keep everything direct and to the point.  Geza Kovacs is as menacing in this episode as he was as Greg Stillson’s bodyguard in Cronenberg’s adaptation of The Dead Zone.  But it’s hard not to regret that this episode lacked the usual T.S. Turner quips.  Other than yelling at a cop for calling him and “interrupting my cookie break,” T.S. didn’t have many memorable lines in this episode which, to me, defeats the whole purpose of casting Mr. T as a private investigator.

Well, that’s two disappointing episodes of T. and T!  Hopefully, next week will be a return to form for both the show and T.S. Turner.

Live Tweet Alert: Join #FridayNightFlix for Diggstown!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on Twitter and Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We tweet our way through it.

Tonight, at 10 pm et, #FridayNightFlix has got 1992’s Diggstown!  When James Woods teams up with Lou Gossett, Jr., it’s time for boxing action!

If you want to join us this Friday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 10 pm et, and use the #FridayNightFlix hashtag!  It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.

Diggstown is available on Prime and Tubi!  See you there!

Scene That I Love: Garrison Meets X in JFK


Today is Oliver Stone’s birthday so, for all conspiracy-loving readers, here is a key scene from Stone’s 1991 film, JFK!  In this scene, Kevin Costner’s Jim Garrison meets the mysterious man known as X (played by Donald Sutherland).  X explains the conspiracy to Garrison.

This scene certainly convinced a lot of people.  Personally, I think Oswald acted alone but one cannot deny Stone’s talent as a filmmaker.